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Stop Waiting to Be Chosen — Choose Yourself Today · Unlocking The Paradigm Portal

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  Hey everybody, welcome back to Unlocking the Paradigm portal.
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  My name is Sarah. So we're going to close out this
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  last episode of the week on a lovely Friday morning by cutting
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  something off at the root. And that is waiting.
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  Waiting to be noticed, Waiting to be picked, Waiting to be
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  validated, waiting for someone else to recognize your value
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  before you feel allowed to move forward.
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  And it might show up as waiting for the e-mail or the text or
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  the call, or waiting for the invitation, or waiting for
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  someone to say fuck yes, you're the one.
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  And at some point you have to stop waiting to be chosen and
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  choose yourself, because your life cannot fully begin while
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  you're standing in the hallway hoping someone open the door for
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  you. And you might not even realize
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  you're doing this. You hold back your real voice,
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  your real goals, your real direction until someone gives
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  you permission. And you may stay quiet in rooms
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  where you have something to say, or you may delay starting
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  projects you care about. You might minimize your ideas
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  before anyone else can. And it's not because you don't
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  believe in yourself. It's because you've been
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  conditioned to wait. To wait your turn, to wait to be
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  asked to wait until you're more qualified.
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  That's been a challenge for me, feeling like I need to
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  accumulate more certifications and qualifications.
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  Or waiting until you're really sure.
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  But here's the shift. Your life isn't an audition.
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  You're not standing backstage hoping someone calls your name.
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  You're already on the stage. Whether you move or not.
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  Time is still passing, whether you want it to or not.
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  Time is passing. Just think about that.
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  And waiting can feel safe in the moment because it feels
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  responsible, it feels polite, it feels careful and cautious.
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  But it comes with a cost, and opportunities pass quietly, and
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  your confidence erodes slowly and you start to forget what you
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  actually wanted in the first place.
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  And the longer you wait, the harder it feels to move.
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  And it's not because you can't, it's because waiting feels
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  familiar. But remember, familiar doesn't
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  mean it's right. Familiar just means it's
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  practiced and it's part of your comfort zone.
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  And the main goal in life is to stretch your comfort zone beyond
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  what you know. And that feels very difficult.
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  And here's another thing that a lot of people struggle with.
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  Choosing yourself doesn't mean becoming selfish.
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  It means becoming responsible for your own direction.
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  And it means deciding that your life is too important to leave
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  in someone else's hands. And choosing yourself looks like
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  backing your ideas before they're polished, or trusting
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  your instincts even when they don't make sense to everyone
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  else. And honoring your time is
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  something valuable, because it is.
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  And moving toward what matters without waiting for consensus
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  from other people. It means deciding that your path
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  isn't up for a vote. You don't need a panel of
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  judges. You need commitment to yourself
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  and commitment from yourself. And the moment that you stop
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  waiting to be chosen, something inside of you will settle.
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  You'll stop scanning the room for approval, you'll stop
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  adjusting yourself to fit others expectations, and you stop
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  shrinking to be acceptable. You become steady and grounded
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  and clear, and your actions stop being reactions to other people.
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  They end up becoming expressions of who you truly are, and you
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  move because you decided to, not because someone else allowed you
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  to. And that, my friends, is
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  leadership over your own life. So choosing yourself, it isn't
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  dramatic. It may sound dramatic, yet it
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  isn't. And it doesn't require some big
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  grand gesture or a total life overhaul.
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  And for reference, refer back to my Don't Blow Up Your Life
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  episodes. And it may look like applying
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  for the thing even if you're not sure that you're going to get
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  it, or signing up for the class that you keep talking about, or
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  that you've dreamed about doing or even thought about doing.
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  It's setting a boundary without writing A5 paragraph explanation
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  of why that boundary is necessary for you.
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  It's saying yes to growth even when it's uncomfortable.
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  And it's saying no to what dreams, what drains you, even if
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  it disappoints someone. It's quiet courage.
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  It's repeated daily. It's small decisions that slowly
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  reshape your life. And here's the truth.
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  There is no magical moment where fear disappears and certainty
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  arrives. And I frequently reference this.
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  There is a note at my office and I love it, and it says
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  fearlessness is not a prerequisite.
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  Do it scared because fear is not going to go away.
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  You face the fear and you move toward it.
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  Confidence doesn't come first. Action does.
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  And confidence grows because you moved, not because you waited
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  until you felt ready. So if you've been waiting for
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  motivation, this is it. Consider this your wake up call.
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  If you've been waiting for proof that you're allowed to take the
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  steps toward who you want to be, guess what you are.
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  I give you full permission. And if you've been waiting for
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  someone to tell you that you're ready, screw them.
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  You don't need them. You're ready.
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  You're ready the moment that you decide to be so.
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  You don't need to be chosen to live a meaningful life, and you
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  don't need to be picked to move forward, and you don't need to
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  be somebody else's fuck yes. To be your own fuck yes.
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  You don't need external permission to become who you are
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  meant to be. Choose yourself.
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  Back yourself and move like your life belongs to you.
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  Because guess what it does. And once you start moving,
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  you'll realize you were never actually waiting to be chosen.
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  You were waiting to believe that you could choose yourself.
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  I have only recently embraced this and it feels empowering.
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  And I will say as a side note, there is grief that comes with
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  it when you realize that others haven't chosen you or other
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  opportunities have not been for you, feel the grief and continue
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  to choose yourself. So I will see you on the other
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  side of the step that you take today.
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  And I would love to hear about it in the comments.
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  So you know, if you get a chance, do all the things like
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  share, subscribe, whatever height points, whatever.
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  But for today, take one step and choose yourself.
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  I will talk to you again soon. Have a wonderful Friday.