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The Amazing Generation: Exposing the Tech Wizards (How We Protect Children from Addictive Apps) · Other Peoples Parenting

• 0:01
  There's no reason to be.
• 0:03
  I feel more relaxed at the studio,.
• 0:06
  I swear, than in your own bedroom.
• 0:07
  My own bedroom.
• 0:08
  I know.
• 0:09
  Oh, gosh.
• 0:10
  Listen, remember, it's all editable, so.
• 0:13
  Right.
• 0:13
  That's just power through.
• 0:14
  That's the key.
• 0:15
  We will power through.
• 0:16
  Okay, Are you settled?
• 0:17
  Settled.
• 0:18
  Settled.
• 0:19
  I'm ready to go.
• 0:20
  Okay.
• 0:21
  Hello, everyone.
• 0:22
  Welcome back to another episode of Other People's Parenting, where we read parenting books and review them for you.
• 0:28
  I'm Skylar Hurwitz, immature parent, and this is my mom, Karen Quinn, New York Times bestselling author and founder of Habit Coach and Testing Mom.
• 0:38
  Hello, Mom.
• 0:40
  Hi, Skyler.
• 0:41
  How are you?
• 0:42
  Good.
• 0:42
  We're back in our bedroom studio, so wish us luck, people.
• 0:48
  Oh, God, I hope our other bedroom episodes haven't been, like, too insane for you, but we're just doing our best, guys.
• 0:57
  We're just doing our best.
• 0:58
  We're out here.
• 1:00
  It's kind of fun to.
• 1:01
  To do it in the bedroom with pillow and, I don't know, sleeping dog.
• 1:06
  To give you guys a visual.
• 1:08
  We've got my mom's dog here chewing.
• 1:11
  My mom is in a dining room chair because of her knee, she can't sit on the floor.
• 1:16
  And I'm on the floor tangled up in wires with my laptop in front of me and holding onto my microphone, and it's.
• 1:24
  It's quite a sight to behold.
• 1:26
  Yes, it is.
• 1:26
  But we're reviewing a.
• 1:29
  I think a very good book this week.
• 1:31
  Yes, agreed.
• 1:32
  I'm excited about it.
• 1:33
  So you guys might remember early on in season, season one, we covered Jonathan Heights, the Anxious Generation, which has been a marquee book.
• 1:42
  It came out probably around a year ago at this point.
• 1:45
  Maybe a little less.
• 1:46
  Oh, I.
• 1:47
  I don't know.
• 1:48
  No, actually, I.
• 1:49
  Well, I don't know.
• 1:49
  It's.
• 1:50
  It has spent over 100 weeks on the New York Times bestseller.
• 1:54
  100 weeks.
• 1:54
  Just FYI, guys, that's more than a.
• 1:56
  Year, is about two years.
• 1:58
  That's right.
• 1:59
  Wait, let me count.
• 2:00
  52.
• 2:01
  Yeah, yeah.
• 2:02
  More than a year.
• 2:03
  Yeah, nearly two years, in fact.
• 2:05
  That my math is not that, but I think that's what that is.
• 2:09
  That feels correct to me, so I second that.
• 2:11
  Okay.
• 2:12
  But this is basically the book he wrote for kids that covers the same material just in an easier to digest way with instructions on how they can live a better life than Gen Z has before them.
• 2:28
  Yeah, because he wrote it with someone else.
• 2:30
  Oh, sorry.
• 2:31
  Catherine something.
• 2:33
  Catherine Price.
• 2:34
  Catherine Price.
• 2:35
  Okay.
• 2:35
  Catherine Price.
• 2:36
  Yeah.
• 2:37
  Yeah.
• 2:39
  I don't know who.
• 2:39
  She.
• 2:40
  She has her own bestseller Called how to break up with your phone.
• 2:43
  Oh, I could use that.
• 2:44
  Yeah.
• 2:45
  God, if my phone has like any more apps on it, it's, it's probably just going to catch fire.
• 2:51
  So, teen, care to start us off?
• 2:54
  Yes.
• 2:54
  Macro.
• 2:55
  Okay, let me give you the macro about it.
• 2:57
  Okay, so what this is, is, this is, is a book about the effects of smartphones and social media on younger people's development.
• 3:09
  And the goal is to empower young people to stand up for themselves by choosing a life not dominated by screens or social media.
• 3:19
  Choose a life irl.
• 3:21
  That's right.
• 3:21
  In real life.
• 3:22
  In real life, which teen learned last, only recently learned.
• 3:26
  That's what that means.
• 3:28
  Yes, but a real life life like the one we lived when we were.
• 3:33
  Growing up back in the stone Age.
• 3:35
  Right.
• 3:35
  It's, it's hard to even imagine, you know, kids going back to that life.
• 3:40
  But, but it's, but he makes a very good case for it both in his anxious generation and in this book.
• 3:47
  And the nice thing about this book, what, what I really like about it is it is.
• 3:54
  What do they call it?
• 3:54
  A graphic novel.
• 3:55
  It's.
• 3:56
  Yes.
• 3:56
  Which we love.
• 3:57
  Yeah.
• 3:58
  Because you know what, pictures take up a lot of space.
• 4:01
  That's right.
• 4:02
  And, and there's lots of stories and it, they make it just very palatable for kids.
• 4:07
  So kids are going to want to read it.
• 4:09
  It's for kids ages 9 to 12.
• 4:13
  Are you giving 9 year olds smartphones in these streets?
• 4:16
  Well, I think that it's really smart.
• 4:18
  They're not, I mean, hopefully they're not giving nine year old smartphones, but the idea is to get to kids when they're younger before they've got the smartphones.
• 4:28
  Or before people around them like other peers start getting smartphones.
• 4:32
  Because what we have discovered is that once one child has something all the children around them will want.
• 4:38
  Exactly.
• 4:39
  So they're trying to get younger people to, you know, come along on this journey and agree that some smartphones are not good for them and to, you know, to reject that, that life.
• 4:52
  Reject the lifestyle.
• 4:54
  Exactly.
• 4:54
  Birl.
• 4:55
  Yes.
• 4:55
  All the time.
• 4:56
  All the time.
• 4:57
  That's right.
• 4:58
  And you know, if you look at kids today who, who are already do have phones.
• 5:03
  I was looking at some of the statistics.
• 5:06
  68% of Gen Alpha want to be content creators as their careers.
• 5:12
  There are not going to be any plumbers, any engineers.
• 5:15
  There are going to be absolutely just zero people other than Internet people.
• 5:20
  That's all Internet content creators.
• 5:23
  And when they ask, it's going to.
• 5:24
  Be like Russia after World War II.
• 5:26
  Why?
• 5:27
  What happened in Russia?
• 5:28
  No men.
• 5:28
  Oh, okay.
• 5:30
  All the men were gone.
• 5:31
  Okay.
• 5:31
  That's why women are doctors and lawyers there.
• 5:34
  Oh, okay.
• 5:35
  All right.
• 5:35
  So these are.
• 5:36
  Okay, These are all.
• 5:37
  Everyone's going to be a content creator, but the reason they want to be content creators and is not for meaning or to have a good lot.
• 5:44
  I mean, to have a meaningful life.
• 5:46
  It's because they want to make a lot of money and they want to be famous.
• 5:49
  One thing about content creation that we can confirm is there's actually not necessarily that much money in it.
• 5:55
  That's right.
• 5:56
  That's right.
• 5:56
  Or fame.
• 5:57
  Or fame.
• 5:58
  That's right.
• 5:59
  We've been at this a little while, folks, and let me tell you, it's been the same two or three hundred of you.
• 6:04
  Right.
• 6:05
  That's a.
• 6:05
  Thank you.
• 6:06
  That we love you.
• 6:07
  We do.
• 6:07
  We love you so much.
• 6:08
  And you know what?
• 6:09
  That's enough fan, as far as I'm concerned.
• 6:12
  Okay.
• 6:13
  All right, so jokes on them.
• 6:17
  Well, I think they're going to be sorely disappointed that only, you know, the Kardashians can live the online life.
• 6:23
  Yeah.
• 6:24
  We don't need to tell them how that all started.
• 6:27
  Well, no, that actually started in tv.
• 6:29
  No, it started with a sex tape.
• 6:31
  Oh, it did?
• 6:32
  Yeah.
• 6:33
  Kim Kardashian and Ray J.
• 6:35
  Okay, let's not go there.
• 6:36
  Let's not go there.
• 6:37
  All right, we won't go there.
• 6:38
  All right, so let me say this.
• 6:41
  I just want to give you one review.
• 6:43
  What one father said on Amazon.
• 6:46
  On Amazon?
• 6:47
  Yeah.
• 6:48
  Both of his boys have read the book, and they were captivated.
• 6:52
  They don't have smartphones because he and his wife have always believed in delaying digital exposure, is what he says.
• 6:59
  But after reading it, they ran up to their father and mother and they're saying, gosh, dad, did you know that apps with streaks like Duolingo are designed to hook you?
• 7:10
  And apps that you pay for don't have manipulative features because they don't have to.
• 7:15
  I mean, they're learning stuff they love.
• 7:17
  They're learning stuff.
• 7:18
  Although Duolingo is not a bad app.
• 7:19
  You learn languages on.
• 7:21
  I know, I know that.
• 7:22
  If my kid was on Duolingo playing games, learning French, learning Japanese, I guess.
• 7:27
  That would be good.
• 7:28
  But it does have streaks, and that is designed to hook you.
• 7:31
  If my kid is hooked on learning a second and third language, that's fine by me.
• 7:35
  Okay.
• 7:36
  Okay.
• 7:36
  All right.
• 7:37
  Well, that was one thing this kid learned.
• 7:39
  Okay, so they also did learn.
• 7:41
  Here's something good.
• 7:42
  They learned that girls are way More likely to be anxious and depressed than boys because of this stuff.
• 7:48
  This tracks.
• 7:48
  That is true.
• 7:49
  But anyway, so, so it gets good reviews.
• 7:52
  And, and, and we're going to tell you what's in the book, what the messages of the book are.
• 7:59
  It's very similar to his original book.
• 8:03
  Yeah.
• 8:04
  Just in the sense that like, it gives you the same talking points but just sort of digestible for teens and tweens and.
• 8:11
  Yeah, and, and fun to read because it's, it's graphic, you know, and it's really well done.
• 8:18
  Graphic.
• 8:18
  Yeah, yeah.
• 8:19
  Whoever did the illustrations, like, good on them.
• 8:21
  Yeah, they did a good job.
• 8:24
  And there's a third person who's not listed on the front, who is the illustrator.
• 8:29
  Why would they not credit this person?
• 8:31
  She's, she's credited on the next page.
• 8:35
  Her name is Catherine.
• 8:37
  No, no, no, I'm sorry, wrong person.
• 8:39
  Cynthia Yuan Chang is the illustrator.
• 8:43
  Excellent illustrator.
• 8:44
  Good illustrator.
• 8:45
  Loved every single one.
• 8:46
  Right, okay, so the book opens with a short parable that's called the Greedy Wizards and the Curse of the Stones.
• 8:53
  And it's a story about a group of wizards who created these glittery stones and gems.
• 8:58
  And, and they promised they would bring people friendship, freedom and fun.
• 9:02
  And everyone went out to get them.
• 9:04
  And the wizards got richer and richer, but soon it became clear that their promises were lies, lies, lies.
• 9:12
  And the stones made people feel lonely, anxious and sad.
• 9:16
  But soon some young people realized they'd been trapped by their stones and they decided to break free.
• 9:23
  And they started going on real life adventures and doing things they used to love before falling under the spell of the stories.
• 9:30
  I mean, the stones.
• 9:31
  Excuse me, I can't read.
• 9:35
  The wizards faced resistance as the rebellion grew.
• 9:39
  Which side would win?
• 9:40
  And the answer is going to depend on you.
• 9:42
  So it starts with a kind of a fun story.
• 9:44
  Yes.
• 9:45
  And the wizards are meant to be our tech overlords.
• 9:49
  So like the Mark Zuckerbergs, the Elon Musk's, whoever owns whatever social media apps exist.
• 9:56
  Exactly.
• 9:56
  And obviously the gems are supposed to be the smartphones.
• 9:59
  The smartphones, yes.
• 10:01
  But the book explains how you can still become a rebel, even if you already have a smartphone or a video console.
• 10:08
  You just have to keep reading so it's not too late.
• 10:10
  You can turn your life around.
• 10:12
  Which they've hooked you like the apps.
• 10:15
  That's right, they've already hooked you.
• 10:16
  But you can make a change and it introduces you to the generation before yours.
• 10:23
  And that's Gen Z, who we just.
• 10:25
  Constantly read about their misery and turmoil, living adult lives no, I'm a millennial.
• 10:30
  I am, I am a young millennial and my daughter is an early Gen Alpha or sorry, late Gen Alpha, early Gen Beta.
• 10:38
  I don't quite know when the cutoff is.
• 10:40
  Well, Gen Alpha was born 2012 to 2025.
• 10:44
  Gen Z is 1996 to 2012.
• 10:48
  Yeah.
• 10:48
  Okay.
• 10:49
  So anyway, throughout the book we are going to be hearing from members of Gen Z talking about the mistakes they made because they got smartphones too young.
• 10:58
  And they're going advising the young rebels how they can not make their same mistakes.
• 11:04
  It's funny to me that like Gen Z can speak on authority about anything.
• 11:07
  Well, they can, they can talk about this because their lives were, you know, kind of hurt.
• 11:13
  By what?
• 11:14
  Ruined.
• 11:15
  Well, I don't know if they were ruined, but it's, it's, it's.
• 11:18
  They're paying a price.
• 11:19
  That's right.
• 11:20
  So through the graphic novel we're going to meet six different kids and they're all based on real kids and their story is told.
• 11:28
  And in the first graphic chapter we're going to meet Alex who he's at school with his friends and his friends are all really bummed out because their parents won't give them smartphones, they'll only give them flip phones.
• 11:40
  Dumb phones.
• 11:41
  Dumb phones, that's right.
• 11:43
  But Alex has a smartphone and he spends all his time online.
• 11:47
  Actually throughout the whole book while his friends are hanging out together, playing guitar, learning to sing, skate, living in the.
• 11:54
  Real world, Alex is trapped as an observer whereas all of his friends are participants.
• 12:00
  That's right.
• 12:00
  He's always busy scrolling all the busy, busy, busy.
• 12:03
  That's right.
• 12:04
  Okay, so we get into part one and this part is about the wizards rise and about all their lies.
• 12:11
  I mean this book really goes after the.
• 12:15
  The tech overlord.
• 12:17
  Yes, really does.
• 12:18
  They're not nice about them.
• 12:19
  Well, I mean they are terrible, terrible evil people.
• 12:23
  That's right.
• 12:24
  Don't let their own children use the technology that they create and push on everyone else.
• 12:29
  Exactly.
• 12:30
  We.
• 12:30
  And they say that in the book.
• 12:32
  They say that.
• 12:32
  So it opens with little stories about what life was like for parents who were able to go out and play until street lights came on.
• 12:40
  That's a play based childhood.
• 12:43
  And if you guys remember Lenore Skinazi, she loves to talk about this in her book.
• 12:49
  Yes.
• 12:49
  And he this actually Lenore comes back in this.
• 12:52
  Lenore is all around us.
• 12:54
  That's right.
• 12:54
  She's the Free Range children book.
• 12:57
  Free range parenting.
• 12:59
  Oh, it's pre age parenting, not children.
• 13:03
  Free range chicken.
• 13:04
  I don't know.
• 13:04
  That's what I'm.
• 13:05
  I.
• 13:05
  I think of free range as chicken.
• 13:07
  But anyway.
• 13:08
  Free range parenting.
• 13:09
  Yes.
• 13:10
  Okay, well, it's Lenor.
• 13:12
  We'll talk about Lenor in a minute.
• 13:13
  Okay.
• 13:14
  This was important about, you know, parents who were able to go out and play and have a play based childhood because it helped these parents build confidence and independence, learn from their mistakes.
• 13:29
  And there's all these little stories about what life used to be like.
• 13:33
  It makes it sound like this was hundreds of years ago, like it was prehistoric.
• 13:37
  Isn't it amazing how much things have changed though?
• 13:40
  It's terrifying.
• 13:41
  And what terrifies me even more is how much things will change by the time this is relevant information to my child.
• 13:46
  Yeah, exactly.
• 13:48
  It reminds me of that episode of Black Mirror where everybody has chips in their brain that like records everything that they do.
• 13:55
  And then when they're at the airport, instead of like walking through the security line, somebody just scans your brain chip and watches the last few days back of your life.
• 14:04
  Wow.
• 14:04
  I know.
• 14:05
  Oh, God.
• 14:06
  Scary.
• 14:06
  Okay, well, the book explains how today's generation are no longer having play based childhoods and they've.
• 14:14
  This has been replaced by addictive phone based childhoods.
• 14:18
  And that's called the Great rewiring of childhood.
• 14:21
  That's the name of the shift which he talked about in his book for grownups.
• 14:27
  Playing without having anyone watch you is important because it puts you in discovery mode where you can feel free to take risks.
• 14:34
  And our graphic novel shows Jax, who is teaching himself to skate, while Alex is on his phone scrolling again.
• 14:43
  He's scrolling videos about skating and he keeps asking Jax to do his trick again so he can videotape it.
• 14:52
  So that's poor Alex.
• 14:54
  I know.
• 14:54
  Well, he's the.
• 14:55
  I don't know, he's.
• 14:56
  He's kind of the example of, of the kid who is.
• 14:59
  Where are Alex's parents?
• 15:01
  Well, I mean, you know, there's a lot of kids like that today.
• 15:05
  I mean, you know, and I think children's phones away.
• 15:07
  What.
• 15:07
  What do children need with the Internet?
• 15:09
  It is simply not a place for kids.
• 15:11
  Well, that's, that's what this book is about.
• 15:13
  Okay, so the book explains what life was like in the olden days when there was no streaming, when you had to go to a movie theater to watch a movie.
• 15:23
  So these are like the olden days.
• 15:24
  Yeah, where video games existed, but you couldn't play with other people who weren't in the room with you.
• 15:31
  There were landlines, there were phone booths, there were Internet cafes.
• 15:36
  I got Internet cafes.
• 15:38
  Mobile phones only became popular in the early 2000s.
• 15:42
  I mean, I remember when, you know, people did not have mobile phone.
• 15:46
  It was like I used to see.
• 15:49
  It was so strange when someone had a mobile phone.
• 15:51
  They were also enormous.
• 15:52
  They looked like.
• 15:53
  Yeah.
• 15:54
  You know, wireless landline phones.
• 15:56
  Yeah, they were gigantic.
• 15:59
  That's true, that's true.
• 16:00
  They were not easy, but bulky.
• 16:01
  They were cumbersome.
• 16:02
  That's true.
• 16:03
  And text messages were really hard to send back then.
• 16:06
  You had to hit every button five times to get one letter.
• 16:09
  That's right.
• 16:09
  It was so hard to send a text.
• 16:11
  Never worth it.
• 16:12
  And.
• 16:12
  And in the book, they ask.
• 16:14
  They tell the kids to ask your parents about early social media.
• 16:18
  And the book explains what social media is.
• 16:21
  That it's just an app or a website where people can create profiles.
• 16:24
  And what do you remember as the first social media?
• 16:29
  The first social media that I.
• 16:32
  I remember someone telling me they were going to create a social media platform, and I had no idea what they were talking about, but I think Facebook was the thing.
• 16:40
  I remember.
• 16:40
  You remember MySpace?
• 16:41
  Oh, yeah, I do remember.
• 16:42
  AOL Instant Messenger?
• 16:44
  Well, yeah.
• 16:45
  Were those.
• 16:45
  Were those.
• 16:46
  I mean, AOL Instant messenger wasn't quite social media.
• 16:49
  You couldn't have, like, real profiles.
• 16:51
  But you.
• 16:52
  But there were.
• 16:52
  There was a profile function, but nobody was putting, like, real information about themselves.
• 16:57
  They were like, using these, like, doll websites and, like, making doll web pages.
• 17:02
  Now, I remember MySpace.
• 17:03
  I do remember that.
• 17:04
  But nobody knew exactly how to use it.
• 17:06
  Most people didn't.
• 17:07
  It was supposed to initially be.
• 17:09
  It was made for music sharing.
• 17:11
  And I had a.
• 17:12
  I was on it, on it.
• 17:13
  And I remember just trying to get all these people to like me, but I didn't know any of them, and I don't know why I even wanted them to like me.
• 17:20
  It was just.
• 17:21
  I didn't know what to do with it, you know, it didn't make any sense to me.
• 17:24
  Did you ever go to chat rooms?
• 17:26
  No, I did.
• 17:27
  Big mistake.
• 17:28
  Oh, God.
• 17:29
  Okay.
• 17:30
  I don't even want to know.
• 17:31
  But.
• 17:31
  Yeah, you don't.
• 17:32
  Were a kid.
• 17:33
  Yeah, because no one knew, like, that creepy people were there.
• 17:36
  And you would be like, ASL and asl, age, sex, location.
• 17:41
  And nobody was telling the truth.
• 17:44
  Well, and.
• 17:44
  And parents didn't know to get their kids off of it.
• 17:47
  And that's really what he's talking about with this book and with his first book, is that we let our kids do all this because we didn't even understand it and our kids really got in trouble.
• 17:59
  I mean, there's A lot of harm has been done.
• 18:02
  So anyway, but then, then they talk about tool apps that are useful and they say that's okay.
• 18:10
  Things like calendar apps, calculators, apps that send text, those are fine.
• 18:15
  Other apps can be time wasters and they're addictive by design, like Instagram, TikTok, gaming platforms.
• 18:22
  And then you've got the tricky apps because they're both useful tools and they're addictive time wasters.
• 18:30
  Like YouTube because there's good content there, but it's not.
• 18:34
  Stop watching.
• 18:35
  Yeah, exactly.
• 18:37
  I mean, if you're.
• 18:38
  You can really get lost in.
• 18:39
  In there as well.
• 18:40
  Yeah.
• 18:41
  Okay.
• 18:42
  So many young people in the generation above yours talking to the kids who are reading this book are struggling, and they believe there's a connection between their struggles and the amount of time they spend on smartphones and social
• 18:54
  media.
• 18:55
  And the book gives some stats like, girls who spend five hours or more a day on social media are three times more likely to be depressed than girls not on social media.
• 19:05
  Boys who spend five hours or more a day on social media are two times more likely to be depressed than boys not on social media.
• 19:12
  Which I thought.
• 19:13
  Who spends five hours a day on social media.
• 19:16
  But apparently that's average.
• 19:17
  I'm sure.
• 19:18
  I'm sure people spend more than that.
• 19:20
  Well, that doesn't even count all the other screens they're on.
• 19:23
  Well, people are social media.
• 19:24
  People are always on, like, several screens at once, like a tv, a phone, an iPad, Kindle.
• 19:30
  That's true.
• 19:31
  That's true.
• 19:32
  Well, the book goes over all the false promises that the tech wizards made to young people who used a smartphone.
• 19:39
  Like, they promised them friendship, but in fact, kids actually feel isolated and lonely when they're online.
• 19:47
  They promise them freedom.
• 19:49
  But kids feel more trapped and anxious when they use these apps because the messaging features.
• 19:56
  Well, first of all, the messaging features let those creepy adults message them.
• 20:03
  And he says that, you know, kids are actually overprotected in real life and underprotected online.
• 20:09
  And that's true.
• 20:10
  Yeah.
• 20:10
  Again, the Internet is not a place for children.
• 20:12
  No.
• 20:12
  And fun.
• 20:13
  Many kids wish smartphones hadn't even been invented.
• 20:16
  They feel trapped by having to create content online and respond to posts, and they'd rather just be out riding their bikes, playing sports, skateboarding.
• 20:25
  You know, it's so weird that there's like, they feel pressure to be creating content.
• 20:30
  Well, yeah, I mean, I know.
• 20:32
  I have a friend whose grandchild is quite young, and he's.
• 20:36
  He creates lots of content, and I think he's.
• 20:39
  He's Been doing it and it's adorable.
• 20:42
  But he's been doing it like since he was 6 years old.
• 20:44
  And I think they do see, you know, other kids that get famous creating content and they want to try it.
• 20:52
  So that's crazy.
• 20:53
  Yeah, but that's, that is a thing.
• 20:55
  That is a thing.
• 20:57
  And there's something in the book.
• 20:58
  It's called, it's Meet a Rebel.
• 21:00
  It's a feature in the book.
• 21:01
  And throughout the book they profile different gen zers who ran into issues with their smartphones and they finally stopped using the apps that were harming them.
• 21:12
  And then they give advice to the younger kids coming behind them.
• 21:15
  And so that's a feature of the book and it's all done.
• 21:18
  It's almost like Scared Straight.
• 21:20
  Yeah, kind of.
• 21:21
  Yeah, exactly.
• 21:23
  And there's a new graphic chapter that happens around this time with kids going trick or treating and they're all having this great time, you know, getting candy, making Jack o' Lanterns and you know, go just being out and
• 21:37
  about with their friends.
• 21:38
  And Alex is trying to record everything and post and he is not having fun.
• 21:43
  Very illusory behavior.
• 21:45
  Yeah, but that's where a lot of kids are right now.
• 21:48
  They're just, that's, they're so focused on that.
• 21:51
  So then we get into part two where it's the secrets of the tech wizards.
• 21:55
  So that's where we learn all the secrets behind the scenes.
• 22:00
  And the first secret is tech wizards aren't selling apps, they're selling you.
• 22:05
  Many of the execs, this is what you said, who run tech companies will not let their own children use their products.
• 22:11
  Yes.
• 22:11
  There's this thing called the attention economy.
• 22:14
  And the way it runs is your eyeballs and your information gets passed around in the interest of finding ads that can target you specifically so that these other companies that buy this information have access to people who either
• 22:30
  directly have mentioned being interested in their stuff or based on their behavior indicates that they might be purchasers of whatever it is they're selling.
• 22:41
  So if you're online looking at, you know, you can look at these ads that come up that he, they actually tell you if it says sponsored or suggested for you, then it's an ad.
• 22:53
  Which it didn't always initially you could just post whatever.
• 22:57
  And then I think the FCC or the FTC came in.
• 23:01
  I think ftc and they were like, you guys can't just be advertising things willy nilly.
• 23:05
  Like there are, there are laws showing it.
• 23:07
  Yeah.
• 23:08
  Showing that it's an ad.
• 23:09
  And, and, and they're telling these Kids like, hey, when you click on those things, you're making money for these evil tech wizards.
• 23:17
  And they say there's no way to know if anything on social media is true.
• 23:21
  Yeah.
• 23:22
  There's so much misinformation.
• 23:24
  People are actively becoming dumber the longer they spend on social media.
• 23:28
  Because anybody can say anything with the slightest amount of authority and sound like they know what they're talking about.
• 23:34
  And because you spend so much time there, algorithms basically feed you the same content over and over again the longer you stay on it.
• 23:43
  Right.
• 23:43
  So they, it just reinforces this often incorrect information that you heard.
• 23:49
  Right.
• 23:50
  And they don't check.
• 23:51
  Nobody's checking.
• 23:52
  Yeah, they're supposedly fact checkers and people who like watch the content for terrible stuff that you're not supposed to see.
• 23:58
  But I can't, I don't think so.
• 24:00
  They can't catch everything on Facebook.
• 24:02
  There, there has to be.
• 24:03
  There used to be.
• 24:04
  But then I think people were like, it's we can't do these jobs anymore, that they've cut way back on that.
• 24:11
  I think when X got created under Elon Musk, they just started, he was.
• 24:17
  Like, free for all.
• 24:18
  It kind of became a free for all there.
• 24:20
  And then the others sort of followed a little bit.
• 24:23
  But the point is they're telling kids, look, you can't trust what you read because nobody's really checking or you can't know.
• 24:31
  But you know who does know?
• 24:33
  Your stupid middle school, high school friend.
• 24:36
  They know what's going on.
• 24:37
  That's a much better source of information.
• 24:39
  Because as we know, the Internet is not the pinnacle of research.
• 24:43
  That's right.
• 24:44
  Well, yeah, and critical thinking.
• 24:47
  Okay.
• 24:47
  And then there's a page that really explains how video game creators make money.
• 24:53
  It's selling the game.
• 24:54
  It's the ads on the game, it's the in game purchases.
• 24:56
  So they're trying to explain to them all the different ways you're being played.
• 25:00
  You are being played.
• 25:01
  And nobody likes to, to be played.
• 25:03
  And that's really what, what I think is good about this book.
• 25:06
  It's like saying, hey, kids, you know, look what's happening.
• 25:10
  You, you know, you may not realize this, it doesn't look like you are, but you are.
• 25:15
  And the book explains how, how tech companies create algorithms to show you ads that you'd be interested in, like you were just talking about.
• 25:23
  And the way they say they are spying on you and they're seeing what you look at and what you're clicking on.
• 25:29
  Well, they're not literally spying on you through your phone.
• 25:32
  What they are doing is your records, how long you stay on any given post, and if you click on something, sort of where you hover, and with that information, they understand, oh, this is interesting content to this person.
• 25:45
  I'm going to serve them more of this.
• 25:47
  But they're.
• 25:48
  But their character, Jonathan Haidt is characterizing it as, hey, they're watching you.
• 25:52
  They're spying on you.
• 25:53
  Even though it's being done.
• 25:55
  Yeah, by me.
• 25:55
  Don't love that.
• 25:57
  No, it's being done by, you know, technology.
• 25:59
  Although I will say sometimes they serve me ads that are so unbelievably accurate for things I actually need.
• 26:04
  So it's amazing, isn't it?
• 26:06
  I know.
• 26:06
  I can't.
• 26:07
  I'm like.
• 26:07
  It's like, are you in my mind?
• 26:08
  That's right.
• 26:09
  I'm like, how did you know?
• 26:11
  This is perfect for me.
• 26:14
  They're so good at it.
• 26:15
  I don't even know.
• 26:16
  All right, so the book tells kids how an exec at Meta told Congress that when girls delete their selfies, Instagram knows that they feel bad about themselves.
• 26:27
  So Instagram immediately sends them ads for beauty products.
• 26:30
  Oh, my God.
• 26:31
  If you want to not respect any of these people more than you already don't respect them.
• 26:35
  Watch them testify before Congress.
• 26:37
  Exactly.
• 26:38
  They look so unbelievably dumb if you ask them the simplest of questions, and the answers they give will boggle the mind.
• 26:46
  I know.
• 26:46
  Okay, so then they talk about secret number two, which is, even when an app is free, it can cost you a lot.
• 26:52
  And they say, first of all, you know, apps take up your time and your attention and your life.
• 26:59
  Money, baby.
• 27:00
  That's right.
• 27:01
  Your life is.
• 27:01
  Is a collection of moments.
• 27:04
  And the average teen spends five hours a day on social media, and that's two and a half months a year.
• 27:10
  Oh, my God.
• 27:11
  Just on social media, not including other screens.
• 27:14
  How are.
• 27:14
  This is.
• 27:15
  Okay, this is.
• 27:16
  This is all starting to make sense to me.
• 27:17
  Why Gen Z cannot seem to do a job because they are not used to.
• 27:24
  To doing things that are boring.
• 27:27
  They have no capacity for boredom.
• 27:29
  Right.
• 27:29
  And that's important to develop as a person in this world, right?
• 27:32
  Well, especially if you get a job.
• 27:34
  Jobs are incredibly boring.
• 27:36
  There are moments that are boring.
• 27:38
  Okay, Every job has boring moments.
• 27:40
  But.
• 27:40
  But if you're online all the time, you're constantly being.
• 27:43
  Well, you're constantly being stimulated.
• 27:45
  Your dopamine receptors are just constantly firing, and it's.
• 27:49
  That sort of.
• 27:50
  It creates this dulling effect.
• 27:51
  Because if everything is so thrilling and exciting, nothing really is there's.
• 27:56
  No contrast.
• 27:57
  That's right.
• 27:58
  So then we get back to the graphic novel, and it's a snow day and the rebels are sledding and having fun.
• 28:04
  And then you've got other kids who are scrolling on their computers, watching screens, they are not having fun.
• 28:11
  And they talk about the hidden cost of screen time.
• 28:14
  First you're missing out on experiences, then you're fubbing, which I didn't even know was it.
• 28:20
  I don't even know what that is.
• 28:21
  I know, I never.
• 28:21
  That's not in the lexicon they invented.
• 28:23
  H U B B I N G.
• 28:25
  Fubbing tweens.
• 28:28
  Is that real?
• 28:29
  No, but I'll tell you, I'll go back to fubbing.
• 28:40
  Yeah, yeah.
• 28:43
  That's a thing.
• 28:43
  According to him.
• 28:45
  Okay.
• 28:45
  Hello.
• 28:46
  Why is my mic not working?
• 28:52
  Should be working.
• 28:53
  How long?
• 28:54
  It's just been, like a second.
• 28:56
  Okay.
• 28:59
  It's green years.
• 29:01
  I know, but there's.
• 29:02
  I have no.
• 29:03
  Yeah, okay.
• 29:04
  Okay.
• 29:09
  So now we get into the hidden cost of screen time, missy.
• 29:13
  Wait, what's fubbing?
• 29:15
  Wait, I'm.
• 29:17
  Back up, back up, back up.
• 29:19
  Stop.
• 29:20
  I haven't gotten to it yet.
• 29:21
  I backed up a little bit.
• 29:22
  Okay.
• 29:23
  I backed up.
• 29:23
  Okay, start over.
• 29:25
  So now we get into the hidden cost of screen time.
• 29:28
  First, missing out on experiences.
• 29:31
  Second, phubbing, which is spelled P H U B B I N G, which I had no idea what that was.
• 29:38
  Tweens.
• 29:39
  If you're out.
• 29:40
  Us.
• 29:40
  If this is a real word.
• 29:41
  I.
• 29:42
  I figured it out.
• 29:43
  I went online and.
• 29:43
  Well, no, I know, but, like, do people use this word?
• 29:47
  Well, Jonathan, hate does.
• 29:49
  It's.
• 29:50
  This is what he says it means.
• 29:51
  Okay.
• 29:52
  When someone rudely checks their phone in the middle of a conversation or is half listening because they're distracted by their phone, which happens all the time.
• 30:01
  I don't know if you could really.
• 30:02
  If it really is called fubbing, but it's.
• 30:06
  It's a terrible thing.
• 30:07
  I think he made that up.
• 30:09
  Fubbing.
• 30:09
  I don't know what that even.
• 30:11
  Yeah, I know.
• 30:11
  I'm like.
• 30:12
  Usually things like that you can figure out.
• 30:14
  I know etymology of phubbing, and I'm not seeing it.
• 30:17
  Well, anyway, but the point is, it.
• 30:19
  This is a cost of screen time is that you're talking to your friends and they're, like, looking at their phone, which happens to me all the time.
• 30:27
  I hate that.
• 30:28
  I.
• 30:28
  I don't.
• 30:29
  I apologize if.
• 30:30
  If I'm with people and I have to check my phone for any reason, I always apologize.
• 30:35
  Maybe that's an old person thing.
• 30:37
  I don't know.
• 30:38
  Anyway, missing out on making memories with your friends and sleep.
• 30:43
  You know, teenagers are online all the time, and the blue light distracts from their sleep.
• 30:48
  Okay, so the third secret is that tech wizards are hacking your brain.
• 30:54
  Brain hacking is how you would describe how people get to.
• 31:02
  Okay, stop.
• 31:04
  Energy.
• 31:04
  Energy.
• 31:05
  Oh, energy.
• 31:05
  You're falling asleep.
• 31:06
  Okay, sorry.
• 31:07
  Okay.
• 31:07
  I didn't know what you were telling me.
• 31:09
  Energy up, energy up.
• 31:11
  I was like, chip, chip, chip.
• 31:12
  Okay, I'm losing you.
• 31:14
  Okay, I'm falling asleep.
• 31:15
  Okay, got it.
• 31:16
  Okay.
• 31:17
  All right.
• 31:18
  So now we're getting into secret number three.
• 31:20
  The tech wizards are hacking your brain.
• 31:23
  Brain hacking means that tech wizards can get people to do things that they.
• 31:29
  They aren't supposed to do or don't intend to do or don't even want to do.
• 31:33
  They're spending hours scrolling instead of just doing things in real life.
• 31:37
  Losery.
• 31:39
  Yeah, exactly.
• 31:40
  And dopamine is released from your brain when you do something that's pleasurable to you, and it makes you want to just keep doing the thing that triggered the release.
• 31:48
  And they design all the apps with things like lighting and ringing and rewards, and you get likes and followers and comments and streaks, and that just.
• 31:57
  Just gets people coming back for more.
• 31:59
  It gets people addicted.
• 32:01
  Addicted.
• 32:02
  They do it on purpose.
• 32:03
  They're not.
• 32:03
  Well, yeah, because again, these are our tech overlords are not beholden to their users.
• 32:09
  They are beholden to their shareholders.
• 32:11
  Right.
• 32:11
  So the more attention we feed into the attention economy, the more money they ultimately make.
• 32:17
  Right.
• 32:17
  And they're explaining this to kids in a way that kids can understand it, which is great.
• 32:21
  Don't let them use you.
• 32:23
  Yeah, nobody wants to get used like that.
• 32:25
  Ew.
• 32:25
  Ew.
• 32:26
  Creepy.
• 32:27
  Yeah.
• 32:27
  So you can tell if your brain has been hacked if you sort of.
• 32:32
  If you're always feeling like you're missing.
• 32:34
  Out, hack the mainframe.
• 32:37
  That's right.
• 32:37
  If you feel excited but not really satisfied, if your real life feels dull, if you start losing track of time while you're online and you feel really bad about it afterwards.
• 32:47
  Those are the symptoms of knowing a brain hack.
• 32:50
  Brain hack.
• 32:51
  Brain hack.
• 32:52
  It's like Covid graphic novel goes into a story of kids on spring break, and there's one kid who gets to go to London, but while she's there, she's constantly on her phone.
• 33:04
  And then there's another kid who gets to go camping, and she has a great time being outdoors with her family.
• 33:11
  Because there's no Internet.
• 33:12
  There's no Internet, there's no phone.
• 33:14
  So.
• 33:15
  Yeah.
• 33:15
  So it just Goes to show you that you know, you can.
• 33:18
  You don't need to be on.
• 33:20
  On the phone.
• 33:21
  You shouldn't be on the phone.
• 33:22
  Especially when you're traveling and having these amazing experiences.
• 33:26
  The secret number four is that the tech wizards are rewiring your brain and they explain that anything you do over and over again changes your brain.
• 33:37
  It creates neural pathways and neurons that fire together, wire together.
• 33:44
  Did you make that up?
• 33:45
  No.
• 33:45
  Oh, okay.
• 33:46
  I like it, though.
• 33:47
  When you move your body and exercise, it gets blood flowing, it makes your brain stronger and it puts you in a better mood.
• 33:54
  And that does not happen when you're scrolling.
• 33:56
  Endorphins, right?
• 33:58
  Spending too much time online damages your attention span.
• 34:01
  The second something gets boring, you want to move on to the next thing.
• 34:05
  That's a huge problem.
• 34:06
  Huge problem.
• 34:07
  I don't know if the kids understand that.
• 34:09
  I hope they start to again.
• 34:10
  Someday you're going to need a job.
• 34:12
  One thing about jobs is that they can be boring.
• 34:14
  And if you can't handle the truth, you're just going to get fired.
• 34:18
  That's right.
• 34:19
  That's right.
• 34:20
  Now, if you get distracted by a TikTok notification, it actually takes about 25.
• 34:27
  It says here at my.
• 34:29
  This has to be wrong.
• 34:30
  I wrote this down, but I'm sure I got this wrong.
• 34:33
  Okay.
• 34:33
  I think it must take 25 seconds to get back on track if you get distracted.
• 34:37
  I don't know, man.
• 34:38
  TikTok will suck you in.
• 34:40
  That's why I don't have it.
• 34:41
  Well, what I wrote is it might take 25 minutes, honestly, on track.
• 34:45
  And I'm thinking that cannot be right.
• 34:47
  I think it might be because, like, you start with one video and TikTok is probably the single most addictive app.
• 34:54
  Wow.
• 34:55
  I mean, it does suck me in all the time.
• 34:57
  That's why I try not to even go there.
• 34:58
  I can't believe you even have a tick tock.
• 35:00
  Mom.
• 35:00
  Get off.
• 35:00
  Tick tock.
• 35:01
  Well, I'm not on on very often, but every once in a while I get on.
• 35:04
  It's a vortex.
• 35:05
  It is.
• 35:06
  It.
• 35:06
  No.
• 35:06
  Maybe it does get me for 25 minutes.
• 35:09
  Well, anyway, the book offers it can be right.
• 35:13
  That can't possibly be right, but I guess it is.
• 35:16
  Okay.
• 35:17
  The book offers breathing exercises to strengthen your attention span.
• 35:21
  I don't think this is real.
• 35:22
  Well, no, that's what they do in the book.
• 35:24
  I don't.
• 35:24
  I agree with you.
• 35:25
  I don't know how much that's going to really help.
• 35:27
  I really think getting off the phone will help.
• 35:29
  Help?
• 35:29
  Yeah.
• 35:30
  Okay.
• 35:31
  So kids have a right to a phone.
• 35:33
  Free school day.
• 35:34
  And that means locking up your phones and your smart watches all day.
• 35:39
  Like, and they say, can you imagine hanging out with your friends at school and having no one film you so you can just, you know, be with your friends in between classes.
• 35:48
  That's what kids have a right to.
• 35:50
  Unless you're like, Harmony Corinne, you should not be filming other kids in school.
• 35:55
  Who's Harmony Corinne?
• 35:56
  He's an incredibly talented filmmaker.
• 35:58
  But it's like, unless you're like, the next Steven Spielberg, just like, stay in your lane, guys.
• 36:04
  Yeah, they shouldn't be filming at school.
• 36:06
  Absolutely.
• 36:07
  Tech wizards are making you less creative.
• 36:09
  Your mind needs space and time to wander in order to be creative.
• 36:13
  You need to get bored to be creative.
• 36:16
  And if you're on your smartphone all the time, you're not going to get bored because you're going to get sucked in.
• 36:20
  Boredom is healthy.
• 36:21
  Boredom is normal.
• 36:22
  Boredom is human.
• 36:24
  Being on phones all the time changes your posture.
• 36:27
  You're going to get tech neck hunched over, neck that is not attractive.
• 36:32
  And cell phone elbow and texting thumb.
• 36:35
  Is it.
• 36:35
  Is that like carpal tunnel?
• 36:37
  I think so.
• 36:37
  Okay.
• 36:38
  Yeah.
• 36:38
  This may impact your physical coordination for activities in real life.
• 36:43
  Try picking something up.
• 36:45
  Okay.
• 36:45
  Wait, you can't.
• 36:48
  Secret number five.
• 36:49
  Tech wizards know that their products are hurting kids now.
• 36:52
  I mean, really, if I were a kid, this would really upset me in public.
• 36:57
  The tech wizards say at those hearings that they look so stupid.
• 37:02
  Right.
• 37:02
  They want to make their products safer.
• 37:04
  But anytime someone tries to get them to do anything that to change.
• 37:09
  Change what their product is, they have.
• 37:11
  4 billion lawyers who come out and find ways not to do it.
• 37:14
  Exactly.
• 37:15
  That's what.
• 37:15
  That's what the book says.
• 37:17
  They have many research studies that they keep secret that show all the problems that their products cause.
• 37:25
  What's crazy to me is, like, why would they even run these studies?
• 37:28
  It's like, it's not as if you truly need to do them to know the answers.
• 37:31
  Just look at people.
• 37:32
  Look at everyone.
• 37:33
  If you're on the subway today versus 15 years ago, every single person is hunched over on their phone.
• 37:41
  This is a phenomenon.
• 37:43
  Yeah, it's.
• 37:43
  It's their own research, which is interesting.
• 37:46
  They do research that's really detrimental to them.
• 37:49
  Like instant Instagram has found that.
• 37:52
  That they make body image worse for one in three teenage girls.
• 37:56
  I would say three and three teenage girls.
• 37:58
  I think they're underselling, maybe terrible research.
• 38:01
  They.
• 38:01
  The Instagram says that teens told us they don't like the Amount of time they spend on Instagram, they feel addicted.
• 38:08
  TikTok.
• 38:09
  People who use TikTok are more anxious.
• 38:11
  They have a harder time thinking, remembering, having deep conversations.
• 38:15
  And China knows everything.
• 38:17
  And empathizing.
• 38:19
  And China knows what you're doing and thinking.
• 38:21
  Yeah, that's right.
• 38:23
  They also know that bullies and criminals use their apps to torment kids, to sell them drugs, including fake pills laced with dangerous substances, substances that have killed some teens.
• 38:36
  That's what they say in the book.
• 38:37
  No, I know, I know, but it's such a crazy, absurd example to include, especially when I think of like, the demographic of the.
• 38:43
  This book is like young teenagers.
• 38:46
  Yeah, Preteens.
• 38:46
  They don't know what Fentanyl is.
• 38:48
  They don't know what Silk Road is.
• 38:49
  Well, I know, but they're trying to scare them straight, you know, kind of.
• 38:53
  They're trying to say, look, don't get involved with this.
• 38:55
  Right.
• 38:56
  And get off the web.
• 38:58
  Get off.
• 38:59
  And they know that many adults pretend to be attractive teens online and convince teens to send them inappropriate photos.
• 39:08
  I mean, that.
• 39:09
  That happens and it's very bad.
• 39:10
  And that's a crime.
• 39:12
  Well, yeah, but I mean, and kids to have.
• 39:15
  I'm sure.
• 39:16
  I mean, bad.
• 39:17
  I'm sure.
• 39:18
  I'm sure.
• 39:18
  Again, honestly, even if you do know the person, first rule of thumb, don't ever send pictures of yourself to anyone that are inappropriate.
• 39:28
  Because, I mean, honestly, this is not going to be relevant in a few years because AI can create images of anyone in a few years.
• 39:35
  So stop putting pictures of yourself to feed to our AI overlords so they can make pictures of you doing things you did do.
• 39:42
  Right.
• 39:42
  I mean, it's.
• 39:43
  It's really upsetting.
• 39:45
  And they say tech wizards don't care about you as a person.
• 39:48
  They only care that you use their products and make them money.
• 39:51
  The book comes right out and says the tech wizards don't want you to have real world interests because if you have real world interests, you're not going to look at their apps.
• 40:02
  They don't want you to have fun with your friends in person because they want you to look.
• 40:07
  Look for online communities.
• 40:09
  They don't want you to be able to focus and concentrate because the weaker your attention span, the easier it is for them to distract you.
• 40:16
  They don't want you to know how many people in the generation above yours regrets getting smartphones and social media accounts.
• 40:24
  And they don't want you to think for yourself because if you did, you might become a rebel and fight back.
• 40:30
  I know.
• 40:31
  And then they.
• 40:32
  There's A big story then at this point in the book, it's a graphic novel about a kid who does a science fair project about how tech companies manipulate kids into using smartphones in ways that harm them and make
• 40:45
  them feel bad.
• 40:46
  So there's a, there's a really bright kid who does a good science project on this.
• 40:50
  Good for him.
• 40:51
  Yeah, being irl.
• 40:52
  Exactly.
• 40:53
  All right.
• 40:54
  How to be a rebel.
• 40:55
  So this is the part where they're going to try to get you to say, all right, I'm going to be a rebel.
• 41:00
  And they say rebel.
• 41:01
  Rebels live by this code.
• 41:03
  They use technology as a tool.
• 41:05
  They don't let technology use them.
• 41:07
  They fill their life with real friendships, fun and freedom.
• 41:13
  And they talk about how you can use tech as a tool.
• 41:17
  First they say tech wizards can't rewire your brain if you don't have access to it.
• 41:22
  And no one has access to your brain.
• 41:25
  Shut your brain.
• 41:27
  Right?
• 41:27
  Don't give it to the tech wizards.
• 41:29
  And their recommendation is don't get a smartphone until at least high school, if not longer, and wait until you're 16, if not older, to open a social media account.
• 41:40
  Rebels understand that all that of all times to have a smartphone, having one as a young teen when your brain is developing is so.
• 41:50
  Is just the worst time you can have one.
• 41:52
  That's what they're saying as a young teen is like soft clay.
• 41:56
  By the time you're like 18, it is hardened whatever shape, not by 18,.
• 42:02
  Even older, but it takes longer.
• 42:04
  But again, but so much happens when you're a young teen, like if you let it harden in a shape you do not like, you cannot go back and change it.
• 42:12
  Right, Exactly.
• 42:13
  I mean it's.
• 42:14
  You're too young to be doing all of these things while your brain is developing.
• 42:18
  You know what, kids love to be told that they're too young.
• 42:21
  Well, I guess that's true.
• 42:23
  But I think if you understand that while your brain is developing.
• 42:27
  No, I have a better idea.
• 42:29
  Distract them.
• 42:31
  What do you mean?
• 42:31
  Give them things to do.
• 42:33
  Keep them so busy that they have no reason to be on a smartphone.
• 42:37
  Right, that's the key.
• 42:39
  Distract them.
• 42:40
  Don't even let them ask about a smartphone.
• 42:43
  Well, right.
• 42:44
  Well, yeah, well that's like, that's none of your business.
• 42:47
  Well, that's what this is trying to tell them that you want to live a real play based childhood.
• 42:54
  You want a real childhood where your experiences shape your brain.
• 42:58
  Not online.
• 43:00
  You guys should be doing like ding dong ditch and prank calls.
• 43:03
  You shouldn't be talking to weird strangers.
• 43:06
  On the Internet.
• 43:07
  Well, and that's what it's explaining to them, is that that's what they're inadvertently doing.
• 43:14
  And.
• 43:14
  And they're saying that if you become a rebel, instead of having a smartphone, you just get a basic phone or a phone that can only call people or text people and just use it as a tool because they're
• 43:26
  not so tempting.
• 43:27
  They're not like smartphones.
• 43:30
  And then there's a.
• 43:31
  There's a feature that they introduce at this point in the book.
• 43:34
  It's called meet a Rebel.
• 43:36
  And in this section, we meet various rebels who currently don't have smartphones, and they talk about why and what their life is like without smartphones.
• 43:46
  And then social media.
• 43:49
  Rebels understand that opening a social media account is like handing teen wizards the key to your tech wizard.
• 43:57
  Tech wizards.
• 43:58
  Sorry, teen wizards.
• 44:00
  I'm like, I can't speak.
• 44:01
  Let me do that over.
• 44:03
  Okay.
• 44:04
  I'm keeping this in.
• 44:07
  I'm sorry.
• 44:08
  It's been a while.
• 44:09
  We're losing teens and we're losing teens.
• 44:12
  Teen is fading.
• 44:13
  No, I have had a hard day today.
• 44:18
  I'm trying to keep my energy high because this is an important subject.
• 44:22
  Rebels understand that if you open a social media account, that's like handing the tech wizards the key to your brain.
• 44:29
  Team wizards.
• 44:32
  Tech wizards.
• 44:33
  Tech wizards.
• 44:34
  The key to your brain.
• 44:35
  They encourage you to.
• 44:36
  To compare yourself to others and they make you feel bad about yourself.
• 44:40
  And who needs that?
• 44:41
  Who needs it?
• 44:41
  Who needs that?
• 44:43
  And the book encourages you to inspire others by taking a stand against the tech wizards and choose not to get a smartphone or a social media account.
• 44:53
  And don't be discouraged if no one joins you.
• 44:56
  If you lead, there are people who will follow.
• 45:00
  And you can always blame your parents for not having a smartphone.
• 45:04
  Super fun.
• 45:05
  Well, but you know what?
• 45:06
  It's a.
• 45:06
  Okay, we'll take the.
• 45:07
  We'll take the fall.
• 45:08
  Yeah, okay.
• 45:09
  Just blame your parents.
• 45:10
  Be some on the most.
• 45:12
  I remember when I met my husband, who is barely on social media, and that was one of the single most attractive things about him really, that he just did not care.
• 45:20
  He had it, but he, like, he hadn't posted in like four years.
• 45:24
  Wow.
• 45:25
  See, that's me.
• 45:26
  I.
• 45:26
  I barely am on social media.
• 45:28
  Well, tick tock.
• 45:29
  Which you're apparently.
• 45:30
  No, I don't put stuff on.
• 45:32
  I don't.
• 45:32
  I don't put stuff on Tik tok.
• 45:34
  I just get sucked into it.
• 45:35
  Yeah, right.
• 45:36
  That's what I mean.
• 45:36
  I.
• 45:37
  I don't.
• 45:37
  Yeah, but you don't.
• 45:38
  You barely.
• 45:39
  See, I Mean, I'm a little bit on it, but.
• 45:41
  But barely.
• 45:43
  Okay, okay, I won't.
• 45:45
  I guess I can't say that your father is not on any social.
• 45:49
  My dad is effectively off the grid.
• 45:52
  He's a complete luddite.
• 45:53
  Yeah.
• 45:53
  If you didn't know him in real life, you wouldn't think he existed.
• 45:57
  No, he's barely googleable.
• 45:59
  No, all you find is, like, a picture of him that they made him take at his company.
• 46:04
  That kind of looks like a glamour shot or something from 10 years ago.
• 46:11
  No, he is not on social media.
• 46:14
  Okay.
• 46:14
  Anyway.
• 46:15
  All right.
• 46:16
  How to stay together when.
• 46:18
  When possible.
• 46:18
  Rebels get together in person or they call each other on their basic phones.
• 46:23
  It reminds me of, like, secret communist meetings.
• 46:28
  Yes, that's right.
• 46:29
  Get together in little meetings.
• 46:31
  No, get together with your friends and they say, get a landline or make video calls and they say it's quicker to make plans with phone calls.
• 46:40
  Interjection.
• 46:41
  How can you make a video call on a dumb phone?
• 46:43
  That's a good, good point.
• 46:46
  I guess you can't.
• 46:48
  Well, okay, you're right.
• 46:49
  Okay.
• 46:50
  I feel like Mr.
• 46:50
  Hate did not think this through.
• 46:52
  Not this part.
• 46:53
  Okay.
• 46:54
  Anyway, he's saying, don't use.
• 46:56
  Don't.
• 46:57
  Don't use text.
• 46:59
  Well, he said it's your last choice.
• 47:01
  It's your last choice.
• 47:01
  If you must call someone, you know what you should do?
• 47:04
  Bring back pagers.
• 47:05
  But people don't pick up the phone when you call.
• 47:07
  That's the problem.
• 47:08
  Yeah, I know.
• 47:09
  Everything is spam.
• 47:11
  Well, because texts, you can, you know, reach back out at your leisure, whereas a call feels so immediate and assaulting and invasive.
• 47:18
  He's trying to get kids to just.
• 47:21
  Just call each other.
• 47:22
  That's what they're saying.
• 47:23
  And.
• 47:23
  And, but he's saying, remember, anything you share in a text can be captured by screenshot and shared with other people.
• 47:30
  Teach your child the term discoverable.
• 47:33
  Well, you don't have to teach your kid that term, but you as an adult should know that term.
• 47:38
  Don't.
• 47:39
  Don't write when you can speak.
• 47:40
  Don't speak when you can nod.
• 47:42
  That's right.
• 47:43
  Anything you put in social media, in a text, whatever ever lives forever.
• 47:48
  You're right.
• 47:48
  Right.
• 47:48
  Anyway, he's saying, go old school and write letters or postcards.
• 47:53
  Girl, what do you think?
• 47:55
  Do you think this is too much?
• 47:57
  No one's.
• 47:58
  I don't know.
• 47:59
  They're not going to be you trying to figure out the postal system?
• 48:02
  Are you out of your mind?
• 48:03
  Well, that's true.
• 48:04
  I.
• 48:04
  They've never sent Letters in their life,.
• 48:06
  They've never seen a stamp.
• 48:08
  It's important to know how to send a letter, where to put an address, where to put a stamp.
• 48:11
  You need to teach your kids to write.
• 48:13
  Thank you.
• 48:15
  That.
• 48:15
  That is.
• 48:16
  Is important.
• 48:16
  That is important.
• 48:17
  Let me.
• 48:18
  I.
• 48:18
  In our family.
• 48:19
  Thank you.
• 48:19
  Letters are very important.
• 48:20
  Yes.
• 48:21
  All right, all right.
• 48:22
  But now here's how Dep Rebels deal with fomo.
• 48:26
  Don't worry about having FOMO if you don't have a smartphone team.
• 48:30
  Do you know what FOMO means?
• 48:31
  Yes, I do.
• 48:33
  Fear of missing out.
• 48:35
  Wow.
• 48:35
  I do know that.
• 48:36
  That's the one of the few I know.
• 48:38
  Okay.
• 48:39
  That's the way that tech wizard planned it.
• 48:42
  But rebels say it's worth it because you're going to have an extra two and a half months a year.
• 48:46
  That's like an extra summer break.
• 48:48
  If you back off of this, you could.
• 48:50
  You could learn a whole new skill or get on Duolingo and learn a language.
• 48:54
  That's true.
• 48:56
  Okay.
• 48:56
  If you're worried about being different, don't.
• 48:59
  People are attracted to people who are different.
• 49:01
  Just like you were attracted to your husband who was not really on social media.
• 49:06
  Yeah, that was a part of it.
• 49:08
  I was like, you don't care what anybody thinks.
• 49:10
  He doesn't.
• 49:10
  No.
• 49:11
  No.
• 49:12
  That's good for him.
• 49:13
  Okay.
• 49:13
  Rebels use tech wisely.
• 49:15
  They understand that not all screens or technologies are created equal.
• 49:21
  If a technology can help you learn or accomplish something, it's a useful tool.
• 49:25
  You can watch movies, documentaries, learn about math or science.
• 49:29
  That's all.
• 49:30
  Okay.
• 49:30
  On your.
• 49:31
  On your, you know, screens.
• 49:34
  That's fine.
• 49:34
  Fine.
• 49:35
  But they say don't use tech as a shortcut.
• 49:38
  If you're supposed to write an essay for class, don't use AI to help you do it.
• 49:44
  You are using it to get out of hard work when you do that.
• 49:47
  And it's important that you know how to do hard work.
• 49:50
  Unlike Gen Z.
• 49:51
  Right.
• 49:51
  That's a.
• 49:52
  That's true.
• 49:52
  That's really turned into a problem.
• 49:54
  Yeah.
• 49:55
  Also like plagiarism.
• 49:57
  Guys, teach your kids about plagiarism and why it's bad.
• 50:01
  That's true.
• 50:02
  Yeah.
• 50:03
  Playing a video game with a friend in person is going to be more fun than playing with strangers you don't know.
• 50:09
  Bring back Mario Kart.
• 50:12
  Is that no longer a thing?
• 50:13
  I mean, I don't know.
• 50:14
  I just remember playing it on Nintendo with, like, Sam and a friend of his, and it was just so competitive and vicious because we were all in the same room together.
• 50:24
  Yeah.
• 50:25
  So that's fun.
• 50:25
  That's what they're saying.
• 50:26
  Okay.
• 50:27
  And if something is designed to be addictive, you should avoid it.
• 50:30
  Apps you subscribe to are less likely to be addictive.
• 50:34
  Also, if you subscribe, they're less likely to include ads.
• 50:38
  And when you're faced with any new technology, just ask yourself, can I use it as a tool?
• 50:43
  Can I use it to create real friendship, freedom, or fun?
• 50:47
  Is it designed to be addictive?
• 50:48
  And then decide if it's worth using.
• 50:52
  And then they talk about different ways that rebels use other tech.
• 50:56
  Like.
• 50:56
  Like watches.
• 50:57
  You know, if it receives texts and notifications, that can be distracting.
• 51:04
  So limit the notifications that you don't want that.
• 51:08
  If you get an E reader, don't use one with a web browser on it.
• 51:13
  Don't play video games on a smartphone because it's just too easy to keep playing.
• 51:17
  And if you're gaming, set a timer and don't play more than a few hours every week.
• 51:22
  Week.
• 51:23
  Yeah.
• 51:23
  Good luck with that.
• 51:25
  Well, that's what they're saying.
• 51:26
  That's what they're recommending.
• 51:27
  I mean, you know, look, I think kids will get a lot out of this book.
• 51:31
  They may not do everything, but.
• 51:33
  But I.
• 51:33
  But there's lots of good ideas.
• 51:35
  Play video games in person with friends or online with friends online.
• 51:40
  But don't play with strangers.
• 51:42
  Yeah, don't do that.
• 51:44
  And they say that 1 out of 10 players develop something called Internet gaming Disorder where they.
• 51:51
  This isn't the DSM I get.
• 51:54
  I don't know.
• 51:54
  That's crazy.
• 51:56
  It's like an addiction to video games.
• 52:00
  And YouTube is good for information and learning, but you need to protect yourself.
• 52:04
  Turn off autoplay so another video doesn't automatically play.
• 52:08
  Set timers for yourself.
• 52:10
  Turn off personalized ads and just subscribe to things you really care about.
• 52:16
  And watch out for influencers who make extreme statements.
• 52:20
  Reality is almost always more complicated than those kinds of statements.
• 52:24
  Amen to that.
• 52:25
  Yeah.
• 52:26
  And how to protect yourself from creepy people online.
• 52:30
  Okay.
• 52:31
  Video games have a feature that lets other players talk to you.
• 52:36
  Sometimes strangers will contact you pretending to be teenagers.
• 52:41
  They say normal things at first.
• 52:43
  Hello, fellow kids.
• 52:45
  Well, and they.
• 52:46
  And this is really important.
• 52:47
  They.
• 52:47
  They.
• 52:48
  They're normal, they're nice.
• 52:49
  But then they.
• 52:50
  Later, they become creepy.
• 52:52
  They may ask for money, photos.
• 52:54
  They may threaten you.
• 52:55
  Avoid strangers while gaming or using social media.
• 52:58
  Call the police or tell your parents or somebody.
• 53:02
  Never send a photograph of yourself to any stranger online.
• 53:06
  If someone asks you for one or tricks you into sending one by befriending you.
• 53:12
  And you know, you think they're your friend, then you send them one.
• 53:16
  The other thing that, you got to be careful, too.
• 53:17
  And, like, I don't know how you're going to teach your kids about this.
• 53:19
  Photos have metadata.
• 53:21
  Yeah.
• 53:21
  And you can see where the photo was taken.
• 53:25
  Yeah.
• 53:26
  When, what day.
• 53:27
  And that's a way that people can get your address.
• 53:30
  That's true.
• 53:31
  That's true.
• 53:31
  And.
• 53:32
  And so, you know, what they're saying here is if you ever fall victim to something like that, just talk to a trusted adult immediately.
• 53:40
  Do not feel guilty or ashamed, because this happens to millions of people online all the time.
• 53:47
  You.
• 53:47
  You are not the only one.
• 53:50
  Okay.
• 53:50
  And they talk about healthy tech habits that you can form, like make your screen black and white.
• 53:58
  I guess that makes it less attractive.
• 54:00
  No, it.
• 54:01
  I think it impacts the blue light or something.
• 54:03
  Oh, okay.
• 54:05
  Well, delete or hide apps that cause you problems.
• 54:08
  Rearrange your home screen so it only displays the tool apps, not the time wasters.
• 54:14
  Turn off notifications because that just breaks your attention span.
• 54:19
  And use focus modes to block incoming messages when you're trying to concentrate.
• 54:24
  Use app blockers that let you block distracting websites when you're trying to get work done.
• 54:30
  And keep your devices out of your bedroom at night.
• 54:32
  Give yourself at least an hour before bed.
• 54:35
  And stay off screens.
• 54:38
  And do one thing at a time.
• 54:39
  You can't watch television and do math homework at the same time.
• 54:43
  You just can't multitask, even though everybody thinks they can.
• 54:46
  And that's what they.
• 54:47
  They tell them.
• 54:49
  Then they talk about.
• 54:50
  You could have a.
• 54:51
  What's called a rebel reset for people who are really worried, like they're spending way too much time online.
• 54:57
  You take three weeks off, and three.
• 54:59
  Weeks is how long it takes to make or break a habit.
• 55:02
  Right.
• 55:02
  And they say, here's how to do it.
• 55:05
  You know, tell your friends what you're doing.
• 55:07
  Delete the apps or games that are causing you problems.
• 55:10
  Get a brick.
• 55:11
  A brick?
• 55:12
  Yeah, there's this thing you can get that basically locks you out of certain apps for certain periods of time.
• 55:18
  Okay.
• 55:18
  Get these for your kids too, I'm sure.
• 55:20
  But it's great.
• 55:21
  It's a good way to, like, teach yourself self control.
• 55:24
  Interesting.
• 55:25
  Okay.
• 55:25
  And use the time you've reclaimed to do things that sound fun to you.
• 55:30
  And they say, look, you're going to feel kind of grumpy at first because you're going through withdrawal, but with time, your brain's going to reset and you'll feel better and just go do things that are Fun irl.
• 55:41
  IRL in real life.
• 55:44
  Yes, exactly.
• 55:45
  Okay.
• 55:46
  And then they say, how is this how you can fill up the time with real friends?
• 55:51
  Friendship and freedom and fun.
• 55:52
  I feel like we shouldn't have to explain this to people.
• 55:55
  You.
• 55:55
  You wouldn't think.
• 55:56
  But, you know, people who are online all the time, they may not realize there's a whole world out there.
• 56:02
  Whole world out there.
• 56:03
  And that you should surround yourself with friends who make you happy and make you feel good.
• 56:10
  Real freedom is when you are in charge of your own life.
• 56:13
  You feel comfortable with yourself.
• 56:15
  Fake freedom is doing things and influencer or tech wizard pressures you to do, or because you're worried that people are going to judge you.
• 56:25
  Real fun makes you really feel great when you're having it.
• 56:28
  It leaves you happy and full of energy.
• 56:30
  And it never happens online.
• 56:33
  Almost never.
• 56:33
  It says never.
• 56:35
  Playing video games with friends in person can be really fun.
• 56:39
  You can watch movies, go read a book, listen to music, go to concerts.
• 56:43
  They give you all these ideas of what you can do in real life.
• 56:47
  Leave your house, touch grass, as the teens say.
• 56:51
  Exactly.
• 56:53
  Rebels live in discovery mode, where they're feeling confident and curious.
• 56:59
  And they say yes versus defense mode, where they feel anxious and fearful and they're, you know, worried about what people will think of them.
• 57:08
  And rebels spend time really being curious about them themselves and trying to discover who they want to be in real life and what they like.
• 57:17
  Oh, my brother calling.
• 57:19
  But I'll.
• 57:19
  I'll call him back.
• 57:21
  Okay.
• 57:23
  Okay, let's see.
• 57:25
  And the book encourages you to do the let grow experience that we heard about in the Lenore Skenazi book, the Free range Children.
• 57:34
  I wrote Free range Children.
• 57:36
  Not I really think it was free range parents.
• 57:39
  I think it's free range children.
• 57:40
  I don't know.
• 57:41
  Free range chickens.
• 57:43
  Okay, well, it's the Lenore Skenazy book that we read earlier this year, and she has this Let Grow experience where the idea is that kids start to experiment with doing things on their own, where they pick a real
• 57:58
  world thing to try to do on their own.
• 58:00
  Not with an adult, but they get their parents permission.
• 58:03
  Like, you might want to go run an errand all by yourself or cook a meal for your family or, you know, just something by yourself.
• 58:12
  You make a plan, but you do it without your parents.
• 58:15
  And you might be nervous at first, but then it'll help you become more confident.
• 58:19
  And if you don't have a phone and you're doing something away from home, your parents might be able to loan you a phone.
• 58:26
  That you can borrow just for this occasion.
• 58:29
  Loan you a borrowable phone that doesn't have the Internet.
• 58:32
  Yes.
• 58:33
  Right.
• 58:34
  Or you're just going to go into the forest and be on the Internet.
• 58:37
  And get this.
• 58:37
  It says if the grownups around you are worried about you doing something on your own.
• 58:42
  The book gives kids arguments in favor of.
• 58:48
  Of doing something on your own that they can use to convince their parents to let them.
• 58:53
  This seems like a tightrope.
• 58:55
  It's a very subversive book here.
• 58:57
  It's telling you, here's how you convince your parents to let you do this.
• 59:01
  That sounds.
• 59:01
  Sounds creepy, to be honest.
• 59:02
  But you know what?
• 59:04
  I understand it's for the greater good.
• 59:05
  I think kids, like, respond to that.
• 59:07
  They're like, ooh, this guy's on my side.
• 59:10
  Ooh, yeah.
• 59:11
  So I think, you know, and I.
• 59:12
  Look, as a parent, you probably want to read the book anyway.
• 59:15
  So, you know, if they, you know, try.
• 59:16
  Yeah.
• 59:17
  You'll know they're.
• 59:18
  Their plots.
• 59:19
  Exactly.
• 59:20
  Plotting on you.
• 59:21
  Okay.
• 59:23
  And just, you know, they talk about how rebels do things with other people and in real life, and that's really, you know, they're telling you, look for other people with similar interests.
• 59:34
  Find your friends.
• 59:35
  Find your own friend group.
• 59:37
  You don't need a lot.
• 59:39
  And the book gives you ways to find friends.
• 59:41
  So if you haven't made a lot of friends because you've been online all this time, the book gives you ideas for how you can go out and make friends.
• 59:51
  And once you find your people, figure out what you want to do with them.
• 59:56
  Lots of ideas of things you can do together.
• 59:58
  I mean, boy, they give you, you know, go play Frisbee, go hiking, movie night.
• 1:00:02
  Listen, there's so much you can do besides.
• 1:00:06
  Yeah.
• 1:00:06
  That.
• 1:00:06
  This is what real life is.
• 1:00:08
  Yeah.
• 1:00:08
  This is what we, your parents used to do when they were young.
• 1:00:11
  Doing things with other people.
• 1:00:13
  Exactly.
• 1:00:15
  So they give you all these tips for how you can have fun.
• 1:00:19
  Live your life, don't perform it.
• 1:00:21
  Many people are always stopping and filming their lives, performing for some imaginary audience.
• 1:00:29
  And they say, don't do that, you know, and don't be afraid to look weird.
• 1:00:34
  Laugh at yourself first.
• 1:00:35
  It's okay to mess up.
• 1:00:38
  Ask your friends to put their smartphones away when you're together.
• 1:00:42
  If some of your friends have one, tell them not to film you.
• 1:00:46
  And ask your friends permission before you film them or post anything.
• 1:00:51
  Mostly just because if you post an ugly picture of me, that's bullying.
• 1:00:55
  Is it?
• 1:00:55
  That would be.
• 1:00:56
  Not really in my mind.
• 1:00:59
  Oh, you.
• 1:00:59
  You would take that as bullying.
• 1:01:01
  Well, no, I mean you, you know, you should ask.
• 1:01:03
  You can't just assume that you can put people's pictures up.
• 1:01:08
  I never thought of that.
• 1:01:09
  Gosh, I put pictures up of people without.
• 1:01:12
  Live and learn tn.
• 1:01:14
  Okay, I learned something new.
• 1:01:15
  Okay, there you go.
• 1:01:17
  And they say, find a third place.
• 1:01:19
  Place where you and your friends can hang out.
• 1:01:21
  A park, a pizza place, a mall.
• 1:01:24
  Something where you could in real life go out and do stuff together.
• 1:01:29
  And if you find things that are fun to do together, just keep doing it.
• 1:01:34
  And so that's kind of the message of the book.
• 1:01:37
  And then in conclusion, they conclude the book by saying, you now know how to take charge of technology and to make an amazing life for yourself.
• 1:01:46
  You know how much more fun being a kid was before everyone spent all their time online on screen.
• 1:01:53
  You know what happened to people in the generation before you and how they got trapped by tech and they're sorry that they did.
• 1:02:00
  And you know, the tech company secrets that they don't care about you and they need you more than you need them.
• 1:02:06
  You know how to use tech as a tool.
• 1:02:09
  You know, the best parts of life do not happen on screens.
• 1:02:13
  And you know, if you choose to be a rebel, you'll have real friends, real friendships and real fun.
• 1:02:20
  And that's really the message of this book.
• 1:02:21
  And they deliver it in a way that's just very appealing to kids.
• 1:02:26
  Agreed.
• 1:02:27
  And I do think that the age of the kids, like, you know, like about a 9 or 10 or 11 year old, you know, younger kids are the ones who should read this book because before they get sucked
• 1:02:41
  into all this stuff that I think that's the perfect age for kids to read this.
• 1:02:46
  This.
• 1:02:46
  I think an older kid, it would be a little tricky to get them to buy into some of this because they're already so involved in social media.
• 1:02:57
  Yeah, definitely.
• 1:02:58
  I think that it's.
• 1:03:01
  You kind of probably have to read it alongside them or just show them the graphic novel elements of it.
• 1:03:05
  I don't know that I think that there are concepts in this book that are a little advanced for, for younger kids.
• 1:03:11
  Yeah, yeah.
• 1:03:12
  But you know, you've gotta find a way to communicate to them that, look, this is something that you are going to come up against at some point and you sort of have to make a choice one way or
• 1:03:23
  another pretty early because once you get sucked in, that's sort of like, I mean, being an adult, it's, it's, it's kind of impossible not to have a smartphone if you're A person in the world.
• 1:03:34
  So prolong their childhood as long as possible, because I truly do believe that the Internet ruins innocence.
• 1:03:42
  Yeah.
• 1:03:42
  And like.
• 1:03:43
  Yeah, I mean, it's just.
• 1:03:44
  It's impossible to protect.
• 1:03:46
  It changes every day, and laws cannot keep up with, you know, all the ways in which it changes.
• 1:03:52
  And it will continue to change even more and more quickly.
• 1:03:56
  And so you sort of have to, like, explain to your kid, Listen, like, I am trying to preserve something for you that once the box is open, you just.
• 1:04:04
  I just can't close it.
• 1:04:05
  Right.
• 1:04:05
  So work with me.
• 1:04:07
  There will be kids who have this and other kids who don't, and one isn't necessarily better than the other, but this choice that we are going to make together, make it think.
• 1:04:16
  Make them think.
• 1:04:17
  It's their choice, you know, help them.
• 1:04:20
  Yeah, it'll make.
• 1:04:21
  Because it really does appeal to young kids.
• 1:04:25
  It's.
• 1:04:25
  You know, kids don't like to be tricked.
• 1:04:27
  They don't like to be manipulated.
• 1:04:30
  They like to feel like they're smarter than the tech wizards, you know, and I think that's the message of this book.
• 1:04:37
  They did a really good job with it.
• 1:04:39
  Yeah.
• 1:04:39
  But I also, as a parent, you've got to be a good role model and not be on your phone all the time.
• 1:04:45
  Yeah.
• 1:04:46
  So, you know, you.
• 1:04:47
  You've got to show them, model it, focus, you know, on them at home.
• 1:04:53
  They should not see you on your phone because again, as soon as they do, you've given them justification.
• 1:04:59
  Right.
• 1:04:59
  To say, well, you're always on your phone.
• 1:05:01
  Yeah.
• 1:05:01
  And how annoying is that?
• 1:05:03
  Who wants to live that way?
• 1:05:04
  That's right.
• 1:05:05
  Well, you know, they will do that.
• 1:05:07
  That's okay if.
• 1:05:08
  Yeah.
• 1:05:09
  So, you know, so we have to model what we want from them as well.
• 1:05:13
  But I.
• 1:05:14
  I think it's great that they have put this book out there.
• 1:05:17
  I.
• 1:05:18
  I have some young kids.
• 1:05:19
  I want to give it to myself.
• 1:05:21
  I'm going to get your copy because I know some.
• 1:05:23
  Some young kids.
• 1:05:23
  I.
• 1:05:23
  I'm going to give it to them.
• 1:05:24
  My baby has destroyed my copy.
• 1:05:26
  Oh, she has?
• 1:05:26
  Well, she just kind of, like, ripped parts of the COVID off and.
• 1:05:29
  And licked them.
• 1:05:29
  Oh, all right, well, never mind.
• 1:05:31
  I'll just use my copy.
• 1:05:33
  Use your copy.
• 1:05:34
  My copy shreds.
• 1:05:36
  Yeah.
• 1:05:36
  But I think it's a good book, and I.
• 1:05:38
  I think I recommend it.
• 1:05:41
  You may want to read it first as a parent to see what the message is, but I think you'll like it.
• 1:05:45
  Yeah.
• 1:05:46
  Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:05:48
  And thank you guys so much for joining us for this episode of Other people's parenting, and we will chitchat with you next week.