Latest / Freedom Flip / What Your Kids Learn Without Being Told - EP020
Transcript
- 0:00Most people think that motivation creates movement. I think we flip it. Movement creates motivation. And this is something you live by in business and other areas where it's like, just get moving. Don't sit there thinking all day and get lost in our brains. A little bit of movement can create the motivation rather than try and get motivated to get off the couch, get out of the bed, get out of the office, whatever it is. Do you yell at your kids? Get in there. What do you think the underlying reason is that you yell at them?
- 0:22They just never stopped. So much energy. I love them, but I'm paying the ass. I'm just working all the time and I just want to come and relax. How would you feel if you weren't yelling at them? That's not possible. I need to. Do you think maybe they just want your attention? It doesn't look like, but maybe. Because there's a deep fear in them that if they're not getting the attention or don't know how to get the attention of their parents, then they might not be able to survive. That's our survival instinct as children that are dependent on an adult.
- 0:45to survive. I still want to get mad. I still have moments. I'm not special. It's when I'm feeling that anger come up, I'm like, oh, they found something. They found the button. Now I have a choice because they just found the button, right? It's like, boop, okay. Do I blow at the moment, not flipping out on them? Because then they own you. Then they control you. It's not in a competition with my kids. It's showing what I think a true father is, which should be a mountain of consistency, even when the wife is having babies and hormones, even when the kids are flipping out. It's like, how can I be the mountain?
- 1:15We're on. Woo-hoo! I went out on the ocean with a buddy, his uncle, who are my two best friends. Awesome dudes. Both of them are like the guys I spent all my time with down here. The older one's going to turn 70. He's out crushing a single ski, swaloming. And he just had like snowboarding six months ago. He's snowboarding with his son on Black Diamonds. Broke both legs. Broke like a fibula and a tibia, something serious. The doctor said it's like 9 to 12 months.
- 1:42In three months, the doctor didn't believe he was as healed as he was. Brought the nurse and was like, there's no way these charts are right. I've never seen someone healed so fast. And he's like 69. He's not young. My buddy does two hours of exercise a day, like, you know,
- 1:57He'll do like mobility. He'll do bike riding. He'll do some strength exercises. And then when he broke his legs, I mean, think about the last three years, two or three years ago, the guy was kiteboarding and a little fish like jumped out and nipped him. And he didn't realize he was infected because of it. And so then he almost died, had this crazy incident because of, you know, and this can happen to, you know, anytime you come in contact with fish and marine animals, whatever.
- 2:20Then within a year, he's snowboarding, breaks both his legs, is in a wheelchair, can't move, recovers not in eight or nine to 12 months, but recovers in three, just like a complete beast. And now six months after those legs broken, he's slaloming at almost 70. And I watched this and I was like, man, he's like, man.
- 2:39And then I was playing soccer last night. I was like, I don't have the VO2 max, the respiratory. Like I am not in the shape that I think I am at 37. Like he's in probably two times better shape than I am. Not in appearance. Like if you'd see him, it's not pure muscle bound and athletic, but his resting heart rate, his ability for heart rate variability, all these things are like really amazing. Dude, it's been on my mind nonstop for like three days. Just thinking about how he's optimizing his life in a way that's really impressive.
- 3:09But what is he doing to be in that shape? Really good question. Two things that he's mentioned that really struck in a bit deep way. One, he tries to exercise two hours a day. And like, I want to be moving an hour a day. And then what happens? You get busy and you have kids or business or whatever. You don't do it. And then you're going to bed and you're like, you suck. I'm looking in the mirror like, you suck. You didn't do it.
- 3:30And I was like, wait, he's genius. Because if you do two hours and you maybe do walking while you're on a phone call for work or like, you know, a bike ride in the morning and then you do one in the night. And that aligns with Chinese Eastern. You can work out in the morning and then like late afternoon, early evening are the two times that are best for our body and our energy to work out.
- 3:48So it's like, dude, if I just split it up, then if I do even one, I'm at least moving my body seven days a week. If I do two, I'm in like the top 1% in the world. And I'm really optimizing where I'm slalom skiing when I'm 70. So let's get specific. Yeah. So the question is more than what does he do today is what did he do in his 40s?
- 4:09to be where he is right now, is this something that we can replicate or he is just a person that has an incredible physique and therefore that's the situation? So, and also when you say exercise two hours a day, like what the does that mean? Yeah, great question. Let's go through each one. Does he have like a world-class physique or look? No.
- 4:29Like if you saw him, you wouldn't be like, oh, this guy's like a jacked rip 70 year old. He's healthy. He looks good. I actually, his posture is the only thing I think he can improve. And I was going to give him my glasses. I told him I'm going to give him these glasses this week because he kind of bends over on the phone. Everything else. But his movement, like he's better kiteboarder than me, better surfer than me. He's just active. He's extremely active. So he does the deep water diving. He's been doing that for 30 or 40 years where he does...
- 4:54Without tanks, he can go down 50 feet, 70 feet. He spears fish, cuts the fish and makes his own sushi. So he's like hunting his food, fishing, not from a boat. He's down in it. Dude, he was telling me a story about a great white shark bumping him and he had no visibility. So he couldn't see. And he's in a place he knew there were a lot of great whites. And he thought it was his buddy hitting him. And he's like, what are you doing, man? And he's hitting him back. He comes up and he sees his buddy on the boat. And he's like, what was that?
- 5:20And he goes, yeah, I saw a great shark follow you down. And they were like bumping each other as they're going after fish. So he's just, he's a guy that's like all in. So let me zoom out what I've taken away. One, he's, you know, loves riding bikes, loves surfing, loves diving this, I forget what you call it, but it's like these deep dives that really helps with your lung capacity. All of those things. Loves kiteboarding, like kiteboards every day. And then when he says workout two hours a day, he means more movement. So that might be mobility exercise. That might be just you're doing a call on a walk.
- 5:48You're on the treadmill or you're walking around while you're on a call. He might go in the gym for 30 minutes. And he said, he goes, the biggest hack he's found is instead of committing to doing the hour, he tricks his mind or convinces his mind, hey, I'm just gonna ride to the gym. I'm not even gonna go in the gym. Hey, I'm gonna go into the gym, but I'm only gonna do one rep. Hey, I'm gonna, and then once he gets there, and I thought about this flip. Most people think that motivation creates movement. I think we flip it. It's movement creates motivation.
- 6:17And this is something you live by in business and other areas where it's like, just get moving. Like don't sit there thinking all day and get lost in our brains, which I think our society and the current Western world and people get lost in their brains rather than just saying, go. Like let's start moving and we'll be thinking about it getting more motivated as we start trying on the business, on the exercise, on whatever it is. Like a little bit of movement can create the motivation rather than try and get motivated to get off the couch, get out of the bed, get out of the office, whatever it is.
- 6:46Yeah, and I'm just translating this to, well, basically he does whatever he likes to do. And he just spends a lot of time doing that thing that he really enjoys doing. And that might be the hack, the biggest hack. Oh, do you enjoy kite? Okay, just go kite every day. Do you enjoy hiking? Go do that. Bicycle? Do that. Do you enjoy...
- 7:09surfing, pickleball, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Just do that. That is a good way. So what are you going to change in your life? Me? Yes. In addition to stop drinking from that plastic made thing. Sponsored by Waterloo. Waterloo. Plastic in your balls. Let's do it.
- 7:29uh it does have natural flavors but it's 10. so i mean it's probably plastic peter explain to explain to the world natural flavors please explain to the flip it says natural flavors by the way by the way so we is this conspiracy corner or this is oh no proven proven truth corner proven truth corner okay proven truth corner in europe if you look for heinz ketchup it will say
- 7:56Tomatoes. Europe, who cares? We're talking about the USA. In the US, you look at the same bottle of Heinz ketchup. It says, tomatoes, comma, natural flavors. Who the f*** eats ketchup? What are you talking about? I love ketchup. I love ketchup. Now everything makes sense, dude. Now I understand.
- 8:14Ketchup's wonderful. You know that in Argentina, we just had mayo, mayonnaise, mayonesa. Ketchup? Ketchup was like, yeah. As a kid, I used to think mayonnaise was healthy. Mayonnaise, now I just think about it as like most of it. Mayo is healthy, right? It's eggs. No. It helps your bones grow and it makes sure that you don't get sick. This is like cornflakes, right? Cornflakes is very healthy, very nutritious breakfast.
- 8:44The cartoon orange juice that expires three years after you buy it? Like, what can go wrong there? But you look at it, it's 5% from orange juice concentrate. And you're like, what is orange juice concentrate? And why is it only 5%?
- 8:57Peter, you're very young. Just don't worry. This is very good for your health. I'll figure it out. Yeah. The doctors are saying that it's good for you. So therefore, it has to be good for you, right? Dude, it's actually funny. This guy, 55, I think, I just sent you a tweet from him. And he said he feels the best he's felt in his whole life. And it's like different person, but similar ethos and perspective. Let me just tell you what I'm going to change. So when I watched him, I thought, one, why would I only aim for one hour a week or one hour a day of movement?
- 9:25whether that's soccer, kiteboarding, biking, lifting weights, whatever, pickleball, why not aim for two at the very beginning of the day and very end of the day, potentially with my kids, right? They can be playing on me, rolling on me as I'm doing the activity. Because now I won't be frustrated or feel bad when most days I'm going to forget to do two or not have time or whatever, something's going on. But at least I do the one. Like that was just a breakthrough. Like, wow.
- 9:51wait a minute. Oh, that makes so much more sense. I think the second thing is what you said, right? It has to be things you enjoy because otherwise you don't come back to them. I enjoy biking. I enjoy kiteboarding. I enjoy pickleball. I enjoy soccer, right? Easy. I kind of enjoy the mobility stuff less, but it's like, it feels cool that I can squat now. I used to not be able to squat. Now I can go squat. It's like, Ooh, now, even when I drop something, I try and squat instead of hinging my hip and I can feel my glutes engage. For 35 years, I've
- 10:17I never engaged my glutes. So I had no butt and my hamstrings were so tight. Well, it was all because my movement was wrong. And now that I'm 37, I can feel that changing. It's like, oh, wow, I can feel my glute engage. So that's the last one. And then he's a big fan, sponsor of the show, Apple Watch, Ultima, whatever. He keeps telling me to buy this Apple Watch, which I'm like, I don't want any technology. What is Ultima? Whatever the highest Apple Watch is.
- 10:43Oh, okay. Because it tracks your VO2 max. It tracks your heart rate variability. It tracks all the whoop stuff and more. Really? And so I want to improve my VO2 max. Right now it's only like a 40, I think, which is very normal, middle of the row. I want to be in the top 10% or so for my age group. And there's things you can do, like you can do these running exercises where you sprint and then walk. You're buying the apple thing? I think I'm going to do it for Christmas, but I'm kind of flipping it. I think if I start doing that, I don't really like gifts. And my wife wants a gift idea, so she can give me that.
- 11:12If you want to start, why don't you get it now? No, I got to follow the rules. That's outside the rules. Exactly. Yeah. You don't get gifts for Thanksgiving? I don't think so, but that's a great idea. I should just do that. What do you get, like a dry turkey or what is it? Yeah, it's just I try and get the fried turkeys that are from McDonald's and just...
- 11:31This is a very cool story that you're sharing about this. It's a cool hack also. I think what I will change is I'm just going to start. I'm going to switch mayo for ketchup. Nothing else. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, let me think. Yeah, yeah, nothing else sounds good. That's my biggest idea of today. Yeah. In Argentina, our hot dog is as popular as Chile. Yeah.
- 11:58I don't know Chile. But yeah, we... In Argentina, yeah. Pancho. We call it Pancho. Not Poncho. Pancho. That's a Pancho. Yes. Very common. Very, very common. The best ones is where you have mayo, ketchup, and mustard. You have like a big... I call my wife hot dog as her nickname because she loves hot dogs. So maybe she's supposed to be... Maybe she's in a past life was from Argentina. Maybe. Maybe.
- 12:27You didn't say about natural flavors. Can you explain that? And forget about Europe. Just what is the meaning of natural flavors? So someone grabs whatever you're drinking right now, for the three people watching this, just grab that thing that you're drinking, just turn it around, just read the ingredients. And if it says natural flavors, Peter, what does that mean? Carbonate water and natural flavors. What does that mean, natural flavors?
- 12:53I mean, somebody was sitting in a lab saying, hey, we're creating all this garbage that we're going to put in there. What can we call it that's going to sound good on the label? Huh.
- 13:04I got it. Let's call it natural flavors. Done. That's the marketing guy. That's not the lab guy. Yeah, exactly. The scientist says, hey, I got this stuff. It's way cheaper. It's more addicting. It gives it some pop. Here's the thing. I'm going to call it like what all the other labels look like. Blah, blah, blah. Hotrick, doximena. Accent, doximena. Yeah, 30 letters. And the marketing guy is like, oh, yeah. Thanks, Bill. Let me think about that. Natural flavors. That's what we're going to call it. Natural flavors.
- 13:34Are you saying that it's normal that the guys, the lab guys are called Bill or that's more like the bunker? No. In middle America. What is the normal name of a lab guy? It's a good question. I can't. Okay. Let me ask you a different question. I'll call it Milton. Milton is from the office. The old school. Okay. Let me ask you a different question. Bill. Bill.
- 13:58Bill, if I say, I met, you know what? I met Bill and I said, guess what's his job? First thing. I met like middle management. Middle management, any industry? Yeah, just like some insurance, banking, some like very,
- 14:18Very classic. He wears a suit today. When you say classic, you mean boring or you mean what? Yeah, boring just like standard. I say classic like standard. If you, for those watching, if your name is Bill, just drop what's your position and your industry. And if your name is not Bill, but you know a Bill, just drop what's the position and industry. We want to make sure...
- 14:42that Peter is having this right because you need to get this right, you know? You cannot be talking about natural flavors and then you have no... But you said that it's inappropriate.
- 14:52Inappropriate. I know you don't like that. Holly sent a text. Is it racist? No. Then don't share it. It has to be racist. More sexist. Okay, sexist. Okay, good. Then approved. I don't use social media, but when I'm on my wife's phone, occasionally I'll look and I realize my brain is weak. It's kind of like I'm a bad driver now, right? Because Tesla's a great driver. It does all my driving. So now I'm a horrible driver.
- 15:16Because I don't have social media, when I'm on any of it, it's like I'm a kid that's like pure addict. I don't know how to say stop because I'm not in it. So I'll fire off a bunch of funny videos to a couple friends from her phone from her name. And they're all like, these aren't her. And it's changed her whole algorithm to like pretty, pretty dark, sick humor.
- 15:36And so she fires off a video either to on Instagram, like just these reels. They're just so good. It's just unfair to the brain. Like I can't I can't compete. That's why I have to just white flag. I give up. So so she sends a video to me or to the guys or either to me and then I forward to the guys or just just to me. She goes, um, he was like, I don't know, kind of funny. And I was like, what do you mean? Kind of funny.
- 16:00And I said, sent it. And he goes, he starts laughing out loud. He's like, what? Okay, that's really funny that she sent it. And the video is an old woman. It's like a grandma. And it's like a grandson. He's recording her. And he goes, hey, grandma, what's different about hot dogs at a gay party? And the grandma's like, I don't know. And he goes, they taste like asshole.
- 16:25He just erupts. Like the grandma just erupts like, oh, Billy, Sammy, whatever. Just, you know, getting pissed. There you go, Billy again. Billy, f***ing sick bastard. Unbelievable. You know why? Yeah, because he's working in the boring bank all the time. Prisoner and middle management. Look, if you're in a company you love and you find purpose in your job, keep going. You're killing it. If you're not, you can just take the hot dogs and you know what to do. We're in that video. You put them up your butt, but...
- 16:51And then what do you do after you put it up your butt? You obviously, according to the story, serve them to people at the gay picnic. But I don't understand it. Why? I think that's, I don't know. This is beyond my pay grade of this area. No, but it looks like you're knowledgeable about that. So keep going. I have not experienced it. So no knowledge. I sliced my leg open, chasing my son, and I had 10 stitches. So I'm, of course, the ER docs, cool as hell, really down to earth. And I'm like, hey, man.
- 17:21What is the weirdest stuff you have to deal with? And he's like, a lot of stuff up the butt. And I was like, tell me more. He's like, oh, yeah, everything you can imagine. I'm like, gerbils? Not yet. And he's like, haven't seen that yet. What is gerbils? Gerbils are like little rodents. They're kind of like rats, but they're more like friendly. Jesus Christ. There's a weird subculture of people that put them up their butt.
- 17:42Shut up. What? Totally, totally serious. Yeah. No way. So, and I'm talking about all the things people put up their butt. Wait, wait, wait, wait. They put like a little alive animal. Like a little thing that'll go up the butt.
- 17:54And up to where? I don't know. This is, again, above my big grade. But wait, this is wild, dude. So he's telling me, he's like, yeah. I was like, how often? He's in a city with about 2 million people. Like, how often are you dealing with something on the butt? He's like, at least once a week. I was like, really? He's like, oh, yeah. And they always, on the forums, they don't say what's the actual problem until they get past the entry area. And they get in, and the doctor's like, what's up? It's like, how do you get it? And he goes, well, they have to go, like, sit up with their butt up.
- 18:24and then you physically go in and try and get stuff out. But there's a bone, and if whatever the object is passes this bone, stuff can get down, but it can't get back out. So he's like, so if you, and this is a warning to all those kids out there, and adults, be careful what you put up your butt, because it doesn't come back. And then these people are having serious surgery, like through abdominal area to pull stuff out. Pretty wild.
- 18:53The funny thing I was thinking, Pablo, is if you put the video into like chat GPT or an AI, it would be like, oh, these guys are talking about ancestral whatever. I wonder how AI detects humor or sarcasm because sarcasm is very difficult. Like you think about autistic people have very hard time with sarcasm because it's all intonation. It's all body language. It's like very subtle. And it keeps coming to my head of like it's going to say like Pablo is a far left person.
- 19:23you know, believes that white people are bad people, believer. Question about this that I have for you. In Argentina, we don't have a black community at all. So there is some black people in black ethnicity in Uruguay, a lot in Brazil. Chile, I don't think so. So.
- 19:45When I went to the USA, I heard for the first time, oh yeah, black people can't swim. They just sink. And I was like, what are you talking about? And so I want to get your take on that as a white male entitled. It's fascinating, right? We need Dr. Aaron right now to give us the medical advice.
- 20:06He's going to give boring stuff. I'll go to the more controversial thoughts. Here's the deep thought that I have truly. Because just yesterday, we have a woman with us, amazing, from Jamaica. Probably 70. She's helping us at night with our fourth. It's the first time we had somebody at night helping us. Awesome. If you can afford it or have a friend or neighborhood person, highly recommend it. And my father-in-law said, hey, do you want to go out on the boat? And she just immediately looked so scared and goes, no, absolutely not.
- 20:34And I'm going to connect this. Are you ready to hang with me? I've not heard this theory before. So there's a theory. I have a theory also, but I think that we're going to land in the same place.
- 20:43So mice had a study where they were given a rosebed smell and then zapped. And then three generations later in the pups, the mice pups, when you gave it the rosebud smell, like a very pleasant rose smell that all other mice wouldn't care about, it would sheet. It would have like a convulsive reaction. Like it would have this. They could track that it was high stress, the fight or flight, kicking off with the amygdala.
- 21:06And three generations later, right, from the original one that was Zach. And I look at if your grandparent, great grandparent, or maybe six generations back came over on a boat as a slave. That is a traumatizing, horrible experience. You see people die on the boat, fall off the boat. They were kidnapped from their families. And actually not often kidnapped. Oftentimes they were 80% of slaves were actually enslaved in Africa and then sold by fellow black slaves. Yeah.
- 21:33to Europeans or wherever. And this was, you know, later, at least coming to America. So, you know, some other black tribe enslaved you and your family and then sold you. Then you put on a boat. You're going across. You don't know if you can die. You barely have food. You're falling off. Like, you want nothing to do with the ocean. Similar to me, I was a good drowner my whole life. I still am. I was scared of water my whole life. I think I told you this. Like, it...
- 21:55Extreme fear because learning to swim, I never had goggles and I did this swimming thing and I always felt like I was drowning. So until I was in my 30s, I had this deep fear of it. So that's my own, I think it's the epigenetic switch that flips of like there's a deeply encoded fear of water from three to six generations prior. That is an interesting take because biologically speaking, there is nothing that would make...
- 22:21one ethnicity or another one better or worse at swimming?
- 22:27The DNA code doesn't show up any differently. Like, you know, we are biologically so freaking close as anybody. It's just melatonin and skin or culture you grew up with in a country. There's a different culture in Nigeria than other African countries. There's different culture in the north and south of the U.S. Just culturally, there are different things. And oftentimes race or peoples take on that culture. I think that all the gym routines were created by complicators. And this is why I always struggle. I'm like, this is...
- 22:56Everything is so complicated. Why? Why? Why? There are like four machines. Get the bar over your head and then. And everything has a million names and I have to do this amount of sets. I know everything is different. I'm like, Jesus Christ. And he just simplified and streamlined it in such an incredible way.
- 23:12So it's so easy. So easy. Again, we went to the gym one time when we were in Miami and we went together. It's just so simple. Do you do it by yourself or are you using a trainer? Myself? Yeah. The only thing, I'm just thinking how many times I got... Well, the first time right now here in the gym, it was difficult because the machines were different, the weight. So it took me some time to figure out. But man, it's just...
- 23:37So easy. Now I got to say, I started feeling some back pain and I'm like, oh, what's going on here? And then I spoke with, it's like, nothing should give you back pain. Maybe leg day, you are doing something in leg day that it's maybe causing like that. Maybe. But I've been stretching and it's feeling a little bit better. Stretching helps a lot.
- 23:56For me, I would get the back pain because I wasn't engaging my glutes until I was like a year ago. So then it was all on the hamstrings, which becomes tight. And then that pulls on the lower back. So I would get back pain all the time in the gym as well as doing other stuff. Yeah, it's, yes. So, but I really like it. Really like it. Just wake up, go to the gym. I'm doing every other day just to allow recovery. As soon as you wake up? Not as soon as I wake up. I wake up, I get a matcha.
- 24:26Walk the dog, come back, gym. Wow. That's great. Do you feel higher energy and more clarity? Do I feel so? If I compare the alternative, right? The alternative is I don't do any physical activity and I just jump into the computer.
- 24:46Let's say that I get into learning mode. I'm learning something. I definitely feel way more energy by exercising. Yes. At the beginning, it was hard because everything was very sore. Then it affected my sleep at the beginning, but now it's just getting better. I think that since I started, I did it 15 times.
- 25:06and I am very religious with it. I really like it. Leg day is the only day that I don't super look forward to it. That's the only one that I'm like, ugh.
- 25:18Dude, I'll start doing it with you. You just share me the exercises. And then when we're in the U.S., we can do them together. But are you going to go to the gym? Yeah. Okay. It'll just be fun. It'll be fun accountability, even if we're not. Send a video of doing it. Because you're doing it at, what time are you usually doing it then? Well, I'm asleep because it's six hours. You're going to receive my message with the routine done before. And it's very cool because I have three days, right? Day one, day two, and day three. Let me just explain this.
- 25:48Again, this is not, this is financial advice, okay?
- 25:52This is not medical advice. This is financial advice. So three days, day one, day two, day three, day one, leg, day two, back, day three, chest. And the way that it's structured is three or four exercises of the big muscle that I just mentioned. And then there is a couple of exercises of arms. It can be shoulders. It can be biceps, triceps. That's it. And you hit four sets of each. And the reps depends.
- 26:21This is the cool part that I, because I don't know how much weight. And he's like, well, try to aim for 14 reps, 12 reps, 15 reps, something like that. I'm like, okay. And he correct me now. He said, 60 second rest, because you are supposed to go maximum rest.
- 26:42Like 70% of the weight, maximum fatigue. You need to feel that you cannot lift the next one. But also, you have to be careful of the form because people just do bullshit, right? If you are working the biceps, that's the only movement. You cannot be going with the back or going with the whatever. So...
- 27:00That is pretty cool. And what I do is I have the whole routine in WhatsApp and I copy my last routine. I paste it in the message and I am just changing. I see, okay, I'm just going to try two more kilos in this. And then I see the reps so I can see the progress on a week by week basis. And it's pretty epic. Yeah. Dude, include me in that. Just make a new chat with me in it.
- 27:25Seriously. Well, I'm going to send this to you directly. Once you've proven that you are trustworthy, then once I start receiving something, then maybe. Well, I think what's cool is I like you trying to motivate me with this, trying to challenge me, thinking I'm not going to follow through because you know that fires up the boys. I don't know if you're going to follow. I have zero evidence of you following through on anything. Zero evidence. Do amateurs speak at absolutes or professionals? 0.1% evidence.
- 27:56Because I was going to say, do you have any evidence from Miami? Miami, Miami. Every time you said you're going to work out, what did I say? Okay, good luck. See you later. Bye. Bye. I'm going to get some donuts. Man, some McDonald's sounds great right now. No, we went together one time, right? No, we did the gym, the hotel. Was that a different day than we went to the real gym? Or different times?
- 28:26Different days. I can't remember. Did we work out two days? I can't remember if it was two days or the same day where we did the hotel. There was working out in a hotel gym and there was working out in a real gym. I don't know if it was two days. We went to the real gym. Yeah, you pay for that. Thank you very much for paying.
- 28:40Was that the same day? I think so. I think that I couldn't figure out the gym and I was like, oh, let's just go to this other gym. No, dude, I think this will be cool because at the end of the day, we all just create excuses, right? I do it, everybody does it. And the best proven thing is to have a workout buddy. And the question is, if you don't have a workout buddy, could you at least, like I've never heard of this, but this is fun to talk about. Could you have a digital workout buddy?
- 29:02which is basically like when I'm like saying all my excuses, like I don't want to blah, blah, blah. I see Pablo just went up a pound in his weight and I see what he just did six hours before me. Well, okay, I got to go at least do that exercise. I got to do one. It's a fun idea, right? Because it's really accountability and motivation.
- 29:21I mean, my struggle is with food and especially with sweets and especially with, it's just short term versus long term period. And I am not seeing, it didn't click in my head, the severity of the problem done down the road. So I'm like, okay, this is, and I'm.
- 29:45I thought about it, but do you know the difference between knowing something intellectually? You know, the fat doctor understands that he shouldn't be fat and he shouldn't be smoking and he shouldn't be drinking and he shouldn't be hitting his wife, but he does it. So there is a difference between knowing something and doing something. So for me, I understand, yeah, I shouldn't be...
- 30:11eating ice cream. I shouldn't be. It's not very good. It just f***s up my sleep. It f***s up my diet. It f***s up my motivation to do things. It's just my energy level, etc., etc. I just default into short-term, micro-short-term rather than long-term. Me too. I mean, it's my drug of choice. The only thing that works for me is not having it in the house and not going to places that have it.
- 30:37Because if it's inaccessible or hard to access, that's the only thing that works for me. And then if I can get a week... I have Uber Eats. See, I don't order anything on Uber Eats. You're right. That's tough. Uber, it's all your fault, man. If you can get a week out, will you start doing it again? Like if you don't order on Uber Eats... I'm sorry, if you don't eat a sweet for a week, does it reduce your demand? Until I want to. And then I'm like, ah, it's fine.
- 31:04Because for me, I'm probably two weeks. This has been a really good run of like no sweets. And it's like once I get over a week or two, the addictive impulse really dies down. A very good friend of mine just got diagnosed in Argentina with diabetes 2 or something like that. And basically, what's the problem? Well, the problem is that basically he's going to potentially start losing sight and eyesight and a lot of implications that he's like, that's it. You're fine.
- 31:34Yeah, so he was not obese, but I guess that normal 70-year-old normal, which has 10 kilos, maybe 15 kilos, let's say 20 kilos, what is that, like 40 pounds, 30 pounds, 40 pounds extra weight, you know, because he produces less testosterone, he moves less, he doesn't have much muscle, normal stuff that majority of people. And for him, from that day, he just went...
- 32:02cold turkey, eating super clean, lost so much weight. He had his wake-up call right there. And I never had my wake-up call, and I hope to have my wake-up call without having to have that kind of severity. And I think that that's why I negotiate with myself. That's why I am like, ah, okay, and I can have potentially a good behavior in terms of eating, okay? Good behavior and then...
- 32:29Good behavior, I mean for my body. Good nutritional behavior. And then I just, whatever. I fall into the whatever camp. So that's my struggle.
- 32:40It doesn't seem like it's a huge one. For me, a motivation, I watch the videos with my oldest son, my six-year-old. And you can find these videos on YouTube of what happens with diabetes. And when you see what it does, like basically these sugar become, I think, free radicals in the blood. And they just like attach. And then they clump up.
- 33:00And it prevents blood from circulating in places like your hands and feet. So one of my closest friends, his grandpa had diabetes. At 80, he had his foot cut off. And the guy was playing tennis every day at like 85, 86, every day, loving it. At like 87, 88, his foot's cut off. He's dead within six months. Stopped being active, got super depressed, you know, wasn't able to move around and just gone. Oh, yeah, he had diabetes for the foot getting cut off is not like a,
- 33:30in a couple of years thing. It's more of you've had diabetes for an extended time. When you have diabetes, like can you just reverse that by eating healthy and exercising and so on? And once you have it, you have it,
- 33:41That's a great question. You definitely can change it. All diabetes is showing is the amount of blood in your circulating and your sugar. But then it deals with your pancreas and it's the amount of insulin. And then basically your body becomes insulin resistant. Because we've been screwing with it so much where we put all the sugar and then basically after the sugar drops really, it's like a roller coaster. So then we have insulin brings us back.
- 34:05And then it plays with, I think it's our pancreas that's producing insulin. That's what gets completely jacked up. So it's not as fast as you say, because if it's 20, 30 years of just screwing up the insulin system and the pancreas, it's not like overnight. Now, can it be improved? Definitely. But, you know, it's a dangerous game because it's still damaging these organs that can't recover overnight.
- 34:27And it's still doing tissue damage to certain parts of the body where it screws up the circulation. It's my biggest. The three things I want to work on this year most on health are increasing my VO2 max, reducing the blood sugar, the A1C.
- 34:42which is the precursor. I'm not pre-diabetic, but I'm not far from the start of pre-diabetic, which is like very concerning. How? You? It's crazy, right? Because I don't consume a lot of sugar. This is what's so fascinating and that we all... Because for me, what I thought is like, okay, people that are fat or obese or kind of like, those are, no, anyone can be. Anyone. What? Anyone. Oh no, dude, I'm way too high. Like it is my number one. What are you looking at? What biomarker is that?
- 35:10It's the A1C, which is, I think, a three-month average. A1C. A1C. Is this similar to AOC or that's a different thing? She is more in the political space. Or you could be talking about artist, operator, capitalist. Another one. What is that? It's like a porn star? What is that? Three different business owners. What? The artist, the operator, capitalist.
- 35:34Peter, you're losing our audience here. A1C, also called HbA1c, is a blood test that measures your average blood sugar over the last two to three months. Yeah, that's what I thought. HbA1c, is that the visa, the green card that Trump... With the right A1c, you can come into America.
- 35:54Welcome. Wouldn't it be wild if they're testing their blood and they're like, no, you're going to get diabetes. Too fat. Too fat. This is a fat. Gone. Well, you know that in order to get a green card, you go under a medical exam. I didn't know that. Seriously? Yeah. Yep. I don't know what they test for exactly. I know that you have to have certain vaccines and...
- 36:21But I honestly don't remember what exactly. I don't think that is anything crazy. So the quick background, and I'd have to look at my blood work. So 5 to 5.4%, they say, is excellent. Or below 5.7 is excellent.
- 36:39is normal. Pre-diabetes is 5.7 to 6.4%. And I think that's the amount, it would suggest how much of your hemoglobin is sugar coated. So it's looking at your blood and seeing how much of it is sugar coated. Diabetes starts at 6.5%. I think I'm a 5.4 or 5.5, which is, yeah, this is the issue. Because the whole, there's a lot of things in life, right? If the whole scale moves here,
- 37:03Now normal is what 30 years ago used to be like red alert. I mean the stats on how many people had diabetes 50 years ago will blow your mind compared to today. Now you never had childhood diabetes. Now childhood diabetes exists now and not a small amount. So is this the, I'm looking right now at my test results. Is this glucose that I am checking or is it a different thing?
- 37:28No, it's a different thing. So glucose might be an instant... Oh, I have it here. I have it here. What's yours? Oh, I see, dude. It's 5.3. So like you and I are kind of the same. We're not a fat, but we don't have... I wouldn't say we're good. We're not pre-diabetic. No, we are in the limit. That's 5.7. So above average... Sorry, above range according to functional health...
- 37:53dot com not a sponsor but if you send us a check you will be sponsored we're waiting for the check i love it i love it there's one thing okay there you go my feedback for functional health love the dashboard it's amazing i don't want to go to quest laboratory to get my blood drawn i'm paying a lot of money
- 38:14Let me pay you a little bit more. Come to my hotel room, my house. Don't make me drive. Thank you very much. Let's see what my A1C is. Do you want to, this would be a good one for us to both work on our A1C levels. But how do we lower it? So this is the fascinating stuff because a lot of people would make, oh, it's genetic. Oh, your parents and grandparents have diabetes. You're going to get it. I don't subscribe to that.
- 38:35In my own case, I was working with like a functional doctor. She's wonderful. And she said she does hair tests, blood work, spit, urine, feces, all of it. But she said, I need to start eating more red foods because they're high in whatever this thing is that I'm missing.
- 38:52And because I don't have, I have almost none of that in my gut. I'm not breaking down sugar in my gut. And that's why a higher amount is releasing, even though I don't consume much sugar. Does that make sense? Yeah. So you're saying that you don't need enough meat? She was saying more red foods, but. What is red foods? Oh, dude, I'm a 5.3. That's so funny.
- 39:10What is red fruits? Red foods, like peppers, beets, colored red. It kind of sounds like a scam. Just eat red stuff. So they claim overall an optimal HP is 4.8 to 5.5.
- 39:23Overall, H optimal is considered to be between 5.8 to 5.5, yes. Here's another issue I have. For example, while the reference range for glucose is 100 milligrams per deciliter or less, the research reflects that any fasting glucose over 87 milligrams per deciliter directly correlates with increased cardiovascular risk. Peter, too complicated. What do I do to lower? It doesn't say anything here. What's that? It doesn't say what to do to lower it.
- 39:52less sugar or there's something micronutrients. That's all it is. It's because it's very simple. Are you a doctor now all of a sudden? You just read two tweets and now you're a doctor?
- 40:03This reminds me of it. Yeah. Joe Rogan and I are doctors. We'll now be providing prescriptions, supplements. Aaron just had a heart attack, our buddy. The actual doctor just died. He just stroked out that idea. No, dude. VO2 max, glucose, H1B. And I think I had one more thing. But those are the top two things I want to do for health next year. And probably just the movement exercise.
- 40:33So what is your goal for 2020? Your top goal for 2026? The top goal would be being a good dad. I feel pretty strong on that. So what would that mean to be a dad? I mean...
- 40:43For me, I like metrics of like almost never yell or lie to them. So if I yell at them more than once or lie to them more than once, I mean, even do it. Like to me, those are North Stars for me because they're very clear. How many times have you yelled to your kids this year? Zero. I was thinking about this also with the time, right? It's like, okay, I want to sleep eight hours a night.
- 41:05Okay, it's 24 hours a day. Let's subtract eight. That's 24 down to 16. I want to spend three to four quality hours of time with my kids. Okay, that's 16. That gets me to 12. And then it's like, oh, I want to move for two hours, which maybe I do that with my kids ideally. So then you can kind of collapse the four and the two. So best case, it's two hours movement with kids. So it's...
- 41:28It's really, you know, I still have 12 hours left. Worst case, I don't do any of the movement with the kids, but I'm doing a business call or whatever. It's really been 10 hours. It's kind of mind boggling to think, okay, now you have 10 hours to eat food, to do work, to spend time with your partner. If you meditate, all of those things get collapsed, right? And I was kind of just thinking about these hours. What is my perfect day? What is the ideal? I hate the word perfect. What is the ideal day?
- 41:55and it's negotiables is I need to go to bed between nine and latest 10 the night before. I need to set the alarm to go to bed, not to wake up. Ideally, I'm in bed sleeping at nine, right? And this is, and I set an alarm at 8.45 that says bedtime. And I just did it yesterday and it went off. I just still didn't go to bed till 9.30, but maybe 9.45. But I think it started the clock. And yeah, so I think if coming back to your question is I look at the day of the goals as like,
- 42:24The year is really breaks down as how do I live my day? Okay, well, let's think about how I want to live my day. If I don't sleep well, I'm probably going to yell at my kids or I'm more likely to. Okay, sleep's a non-negotiable. What's that? Not you because if you sleep bad, by the way, you are a good sleeper. So that's not a massive problem for you, right? Depends, dude. When I have a new idea or something I'm excited about, I wake up at three and I'm up two to four hours writing down notes from God or someone downloading into my brain.
- 42:54But what I mean is I think that you have that part pretty covered, even though of course it's great to go to sleep at the time that you need to go to sleep. Because of our sponsor. Because of our sponsor. The bird? Amazon. The bird. Amazon. Hummingbird. The bird. Pablo's great idea. Peter, why this is called the bird? Why? I have no idea. So... So...
- 43:16If someone says, someone gave me the bird, that is this, right? Because it's pointing back, it's pointing up where the birds are, where the true problem is. And then why? Think about that. It's pointing to the true problem. Why people refer to a lady that they just hooked up or something like a bird? These are great questions. I have no idea on either one of them. Well, you need to explain to me because you are the American.
- 43:40I would like an answer now. Yeah, please. This is your culture. This is your language. Or give me your f***ing passport. That's it, you know? I love it when you push things. So it's your decision. I'm allowing you to pass. You can keep your passport or... You need to own it. This is your people.
- 44:00I don't know the answers to either of those. Let me come back to the dad question because it's better than the bird. So I'd say don't yell at the kids more than once. Don't lie to them more than once. And spend three to four quality hours with them where I'm not on my phone and I'm aware. Right? That could be...
- 44:20An hour in the morning, half an hour in the morning, that could be two, three hours, including bedtime, dinner, and an hour wrestling or something like that. That's a day of quality parenting to me. And that those days set up the year and it comes back to those three things. It's a great goal. And what is your goal? Your top goal? Asking fewer than nine out of 10 statements are questions to them.
- 44:45Because that leads to interesting discussions and them learning, not me. You have all that totally under control. You are the perfect dad. I'm not joking. I've never seen such a great dad like you are. I'm honored with a compliment. You are...
- 45:00my guru, my light, my mentor, when it comes to how to be a perfect dad. People are going to think you're joking. I'm not joking. Remind them, what did you think I was completely full of when I told you about our house and the kids? So when I met Peter, Peter has this tendency to speak in absolutes, right? So he's like, I never yelled at my kids. I never get upset at my kids. I only ask questions to my kids. And I'm like, there you go.
- 45:28Peter, I don't know where you were born, but you look like an Argentinian. All exaggerating, throwing all this hyperbole bullshit. Whatever. Okay, whatever. That's Peter, right? He gets excited. He just talks a big game. When he's excited, he's like a little kid. You know, it's fine. Whatever. Oh, I just saw Santa Claus. Like, yeah, sure, little kid, for sure. Yeah, that's Santa Claus, yeah.
- 45:48And then Peter invites me to go to his house. It's a great opportunity. I went to, we got invited by another friend to watch an NBA final game. That was awesome. And Peter's like, hey, stay. You can stay in my house and you can see my whole house operation. I'm like, yeah, whatever. Let's go. I'll see this liar. I'll watch the liar and call him out. Because Pablo, that wasn't his intent. I accepted you as a liar. And I'm like, that's fine.
- 46:13You are an exaggerator. That's what you do. You're a complicator, exaggerator. And I just accept you as you are. I don't want to change you. Anastasia, is there a complicator liar? Is that one of the categories? Is that? You are a non-software, exaggerator, complicator that sold a software business. My business partner is going to love when you say that and be like, yeah, that makes sense. It was all me. Like, he didn't do anything. So I go to the house and I was just...
- 46:41I was amazed how accurate your description was because you literally asks questions to your kids all the time. And that creates a massive level of independence in your kids. Because when the kids, the kids ask you questions, of course, you never answer the questions. You just throw the question back to them. And what I really admire, what I love so much is that
- 47:09you are always so calm. So calm. I, well, of course, I am not a dad yet, so you have a lot of experience seeing a lot of crazy shit with your kids. I am thinking, this thing is going to blow up here. This other thing is going to blow up there. The world is going to end very soon. And Pierre is just cruising like if he was, like if he smoked 10 joints two minutes before that thing happening. And I'm like,
- 47:37Don't you see? And he's like, don't worry about a thing. Yeah. He's like total Bob Marley, incredible. And it was such an eye-opening experience. And then I started, of course, paying more attention about how everyone else parents. And I was like, Jesus Christ, this is so stressful for the kids, so stressful for the parents. This is so much work. Yeah.
- 48:06So much work. And then they stop having kids. Parents need to do everything for their kids. They have to answer all the questions. And Peter just asked the questions back to the kids. And at what percentage of time do you feel like they knew the answer from when you were watching? Like when they answer it and they already knew. So they already knew means just for the audience. If the kid says, where are we going? Not even where are we going, but it will be kind of like, can I eat another candy?
- 48:34They already know that the answer is like, no, you shouldn't. No, stop it. But they are asking you the question, right? Or they even like, can I have another apple? Or where is my glass? Or can I have a glass? Or can I have some whatever? They ask questions all the time. I mean, that's great. They are kids. But I would say the majority of the times they already know the answer because they heard the answer before. That's one. But I would say...
- 49:0490% of the time, they know the answer.
- 49:08Because it's a combination between they knew the answer, they heard the answer before, and intuitively they know what to do. And you are just allowing them for independence. You are optimizing for truth, which optimizes for freedom from all parties involved. And it's unbelievable, spectacular to see, spectacular to watch. But one more time, I think that something that is very unique, asking questions, not difficult.
- 49:35It takes retraining from the parent. But the thing about not yelling or not losing your cool, that is very unique. As you say, I aim not to yell at my kids. I aim to... But I think that you are able to do that because somehow you just remain cool. And it might be because of your growing up experience, which you were trained from an early age just to remain stable.
- 50:00It's interesting. I think I was a hothead, right? And just a couple of things. What is a hothead? Angry. I was like very reactive as a kid. And now my whole dad's side, most of my dad's side is bipolar. Like, you know, his mom had five, her dad had five siblings, all five bipolar, four committed suicide.
- 50:17Grandma is bipolar. My dad's one of five. I don't know if it's four or five of them are bipolar. You know, I'm one of six, at least, you know, three of six bipolar. I love my family. I actually think bipolar kind of like dyslexia is a superpower. Like people end up changing the world. But similar dyslexia, it's like you either end up as a standard deviation curve. You're on one edge. So you're either like in jail or committed suicide or you can go change the world.
- 50:43But do you choose alcohol? Do you choose not enough sleep? Do you choose drugs? Like those things send you to the jail or dead very fast. You know, if you can keep straight, you can be sent to this like weird corner of humans don't do this stuff because I really think bipolar is a gift. And I'm somewhere on the spectrum. Like I also think it's a spectrum where you don't have to be all the way, like I'm not full, I'm not on medication for it, but it's part of the reason I don't drink alcohol, caffeine, all that.
- 51:07To answer your original point or to comment on it is I still want to get mad. I still have moments. I'm not special. It's not because of my upbringing. It's not because I'm special compared to anyone. It's when I'm feeling that anger come up, I'm like, oh, they found something. Like they found the button.
- 51:23And now I have a choice because they just found the button, right? It's like, boop. Okay. Do I blow at the moment? Now, the goal is to not go swallow that because I think that's poison going down in your system that you hold on to. It's getting to your breath, not flipping out on them because then they own you. Then they control you. And then it's like, oh, I got the button. Dance clown. I say the comment. You know, the kid says the comment. I'm dancing. Okay.
- 51:49And they're looking for the chink in the armor. They're looking for that hole that they can get right up under the side and, oh, got it. So it's not in a competition with my kids. It's showing what I think a true father is, which should be a mountain of consistency, even when the wife is having babies and hormones, even when the kids are flipping out. It's like, how can I be the mountain? So I take that thing and put it on a list and meditate and go to therapy and psychedelics, whatever your medicine is, to go work on it.
- 52:16and say, I'm not going to allow it to make me a worse dad and a worse person. And this goes beyond just parenting. But look, I have a list just like everyone else. Now, as we invest in that, just like any other investment, it compounds. So the more we're investing in it, the more it's going to compound to where you're like, oh, wow. And all of these things, don't be stressed, assuming we have any listeners. If you're listening, you don't need to ask 99 out of 100 questions.
- 52:41If you go from one question a day, go to two. Just double it. If you're already at five, go to 10. Like get from 10 to 50%. If you're yelling at your kids once a day, let's try and shift to once a week. And I think this is the thing where just like working out, coming back to the other point, is like we all suck. We're all humans. None of us are robots. Perfect doesn't exist. So it's just how do you create accountability partners, right? So maybe Pablo is a fellow dad and I'm like, hey, dude, I flipped out on Billy today, my kid.
- 53:09Billy again. F***ing Billy. Unbelievable. Billy's a middle management eight-year-old mad at life and he's poking my buttons. He's stuck in school. It's the equivalent. He's pissing me off. It's like, okay, now my buddy Pablo is like, oh, dude, you know what? My goal was yell at my kids no more than once a week. I'm at two. It's like create those systems that are accountability to really grow through that.
- 53:30I think that is, and I push when I saw the operations basically in your house or how you deal with your kids, I push it. You need to put this out.
- 53:43You need to start sharing this with the world because it's fascinating. I have never seen this, ever. And I get it, right? Not everyone is going to have the passion that you have to be with your kids all the time. But still, like one, two, three hours a day with the kids. I think that having...
- 54:05And of course, easy for me to say, because I am not in that position yet, but having an understanding, what is the ratio of questions versus answers that you have with your kids? And I think that most people are going to be, sorry, it's not questions versus answers, it's the answers. No, no, no. What I mean is how many questions do you ask them to a question that they ask you?
- 54:26And then how many statements or how many answers are you giving? What is the ratio? And I think that for most people, it's 99% to 1%. Maybe it's 100%. Yeah. And I would guess the range only goes to really 80-20, right? Pareto's principle. They're probably at most 20% questions, maybe even including stuff like, how do you feel? All, I think to make it really simple, because you're the complicator, it's like during the entire day,
- 54:54What's the ratio of questions to statements? A statement could be go do this. A statement could be they ask what time and you say it's 8 p.m. Those are all statements to me. Questions are how do you feel? Questions are what do you think? Those are all questions. And most people are going to be 20% or fewer questions where ideally they can flip it to 80% or more questions. That's the real conversion.
- 55:19as a takeaway for people, one of the things that I think that you ask the most is, what do you think? Right? So they ask you, can I go and play outside? What do you think? Or let's say that you're like, I want that they are careful with the cars. You don't say, hey, be careful with the cars. You ask a question. Hey, what do we need to be careful with? Or if a car is going to, and the kids are close to the road, you don't say, hey, hey, hey. You're like,
- 55:48Do you think that the cars can see you? Will it hurt when the car hits you? Like, imagine the pain. You need to somehow record all this and show examples of how you do it, because I don't think that people can even understand this. I might be projecting my own experience, but I think there is a massive, massive change. And this is, of course, for anyone that wants to be
- 56:15an incredible parent, and anyone that wants to be a less stressful life as a parent. Because, man, I mean, just imagine running a company. I don't know how many entrepreneurs are watching, but imagine running a company. When your employees ask you a question, if you are answering all the questions, man, that's annoying.
- 56:33So similar happens here with the kids. And by the way, all those people that are like, oh, but what if like a shut up, start asking one question at least. Grab the little one, right? I can't have another apple. Oh, and why is that? Whatever. Tying that back to the workout, movement becomes motivation. Just move to do more questions. And then you'll be motivated when you see that they have the answer.
- 56:55It was funny, the girl we've worked with that you were great and said we need to promote, she's wonderful. She goes, it's lazy parenting. I was like, you're right. And I think that is fun to say. The only problem is you can't be lazy in the first 10% because you have to, like you said, rewire your brain. If you don't rewire your brain and work really hard at that first 10%, then it never works. But doing that really hard work for that first 10% allows you to be less stressed and
- 57:22much more lazy as a parent for the rest of the 90%. But what most people do is they're like trying to do all the work for the first 90%, right? They're just doing all of it. And they can only take a break for the 10%. I want to flip it. Do the really hard work for 10%. Work on yourself, work on questions, help them become independent, guide them through these questions, right? Just for 10%. And then 90%, they just know what to do. They can run their whole life.
- 57:48Yes, and using the framework, I think that is from Jeff Bezos, the one-way door, two-way doors, or let's say irreversible decisions or irreversible actions that happen, events that happen, then you really optimize to bring those to zero percent chances of those happening. That is also the amazing thing. Your kids have their t-shirt is dirty.
- 58:12Who cares? You don't care. Your kids have no t-shirt, no underwear. Who cares? Your kids have ice cream in the hair. Who cares? Your kids didn't wash for three days. Doesn't matter. The kids are eating for five minutes and then they get up. Who cares? And I think that is now again, all the incredible, spectacular parents that live a very stressful life. Please drop your comments of why this is terrible, right? But...
- 58:38Peter and again Peter doesn't smoke he looks like he smokes but he doesn't smoke he's chill about it and he spends way more time with his kids than any other parent that I know and especially any other dad that I know because you really enjoy it but the bottom line is you optimize for the most dangerous things to not to happen rather than you don't focus on the 99.9 percent of
- 59:06that don't matter, you focus on the 0.1% that really f***ing matters. Do you remember those? The top five reasons of death for kids at one to four years old? Accidental. The bottom line is the number one thing that you are looking to minimize to 0% chances of happening is death. You do not want the kids to die, period, end of the story. That is a phenomenal rule. So then you research. What are the biggest cause of death? And you have drawn, right? Drowning, swimming pool.
- 59:36Then you have... It's common. What's your most likely reason to die or me? Bear attack.
- 59:44That's so good. Because that's what's wired in our brain. It's like the squirrel is going to go eat my child, right? Especially to these moms who are amazing. They just have a lot of hormones from the pregnancy and the birth, right? They're like, I mean, my wife would be like, the coyote is going to come and get the baby. I'm like, look, this baby is four months old. It's the size of a coyote. Like, we're okay. We can put it on the outside. It's going to be okay. One is electricity, but it's not top, I think.
- 1:00:11So it's accidental deaths. This doesn't include cancer cars. 75% of kids' car seats are incorrectly put in. So then when you have the accident, right, maybe the whole family dies or at least the kid may be improperly restrained. It gets choked or the car seat goes. The last three, this is, I think, 2022 data. It's only roughly 4,000 kids in this, like, one to four.
- 1:00:33So zero to 12 months is choking. Once you get over 12 months over one year, you enter like the one to four, one to five category. It's drowning is number one. It's like 400, 450 kids. Jesus Christ, per year? That's it, per year. No, no. How many? 400,000? 400 to 450, period.
- 1:00:51And I think the category of kids is like 15 million kids. That is in America or everywhere? In America. This is America, right? There's cultural difference in different countries. So I'm just, for people in America. So drowning, car accident. The last three are choking, poison, and fire. And those are all like 200 kids in the United States. So it's sub-2000. So one, this... So wait a second. It's not matching socks? Like that's not the...
- 1:01:16You only have the fluffy trim on one sock and a yellow sock. This is not okay. Having a clean t-shirt is not...
- 1:01:24But think about the flip, right? Not eating all the food, no? There are a lot of parents who see me and are like, he's a horrible parent. His kids aren't in matching clothes. The hair doesn't look good. Who says that? Oh, dude. Bring it to me. Bring it to me. I will take care of that. Not verbally. It's more of like, and people just know I don't really care what the comment is, right? But that is the comment in your whole neighborhood. They look at you and they're like, this guy...
- 1:01:47Yeah, well, like I had my two-year-old naked on the bike once. This hippie guy. Who knows? I'm sure that he sells weed or something. Nobody knows what he does. I'll never forget. I had four kids stacked, like packed in behind me on this bike. They're all in like the cage. And my two-year-old girl is just naked. But she's in the middle of the sandwich. Great story. And we rolled by this woman, this really nice woman, a grandmother. And I stopped saying that. When you say nice woman, you mean like what? What do you mean really? Really?
- 1:02:15She is very friendly, but she has very strong opinions. But you too, and me too. What do you mean? She's a friend, I should say. She's somebody we know. Okay. And she just goes, that one's naked. And I was like,
- 1:02:32Oh, you're right, aren't you? We just kept going. And I think a lot of this comes back to, you had two really important points. One is the death, right? Which is we got to prioritize the death, right? So under the sink, do you have accessible cleaning chemicals? Those look like candy to kids.
- 1:02:52Oh, the detergent, yummy. You don't know they ate it. They're in the little silver wrapper, just like the candies, death, right? I wanna avoid that. Hey, the pool at the friend's house, nobody's watching. That's death, I wanna avoid that. That needs 80% of my brain share. All the other stuff is 20% or less. The second point that you made that's really powerful is, and I wanna ask you first, why do you think the dads don't wanna spend more than an hour with their kids?
- 1:03:16Where do you think they break down? That you're talking about? Yes, dads with the children. First of all, I don't know, and I'm sure that there are exceptions, but I was going to say that I think that the vast majority just breaks down because they are maybe working a job that they don't want to be working, and they have no energy, they have no more patience, and they've been eating shit.
- 1:03:37all day long and they are stressed because it's their job to provide and to provide the safety and they are trying to make it work in this system that or trying to leave this lie that we've been told so i think that it comes to that and therefore the last thing that they want yeah they that's why beer sells so much that's why tv sells so much because like you know what just
- 1:03:59I can numb my brain. I don't want to hear Billy shouting here and there. I think that is all correct. Now, the percentage we have to think about. Here's another thought. How much of it is they don't want someone pressing the button, forcing them to think about how much the job sucks, something sucks, how frustrated they are. They don't want someone pressing the button that reminds them of when they were a kid and what dad said or mom said.
- 1:04:25Because these kids are CIA agents sent to our house to find our weakest moments, our weakest points, our wounds that are in our brain, but they're poking the physical entry point with a comment. The kids are sent to do that. It's like a crazy experiment where they know everything about us. They watch us. We're under surveillance 24-7, 365 days a week. They know everything. Right?
- 1:04:49And how does it feel when I'm tired, I'm stressed, and they poke the button that as a kid, my dad always said, don't do that. And suddenly they're doing it. Boom. Triggers this, right? And I truly think if you flip it, it's like they're teaching us. Treat your children like they're your parents and your parents like they're your children.
- 1:05:10Like the child is teaching us what my issue is. They're pointing at it. They're poking the dang button, giving me the opportunity to understand it. I hopefully am not ignoring it. Everybody does, right? Ignoring it, getting mad at them, wanting to leave, wanting to get away from them, wanting to put the TV on to just get them distracted, right? Because I don't want to face this thing that is so difficult and traumatic from my history, from my day job, whatever, whether it's childhood stuff or whether it's the day-to-day stress, right? It's causing me to face these things I don't want to.
- 1:05:40Let's just go now broader. If someone decides to face it, we're removing these layers. It's like an onion. We're removing a layer of onion. Yeah, maybe we cry. Maybe it's emotional. But then we're getting the core of who we are. And I think at our core, we're actually children, right? We're still children. And there's a positive child and there's a tantrum child.
- 1:05:58And it's our choice which one of those is really coming out. A dad yelling, that's a tantrum child. A dad playing with the kid, that's the beautiful true nature that he has the opportunity as a guide, his child as a guide to bring him back to that. And the greatest compliment I got from my son like a week ago, he's talking to another kid. He's like, Peter should come with us. And they're like, why, Peter? And he's like, oh, my dad. And they're like, what do you mean? He's not a kid. And he goes, yeah, he's a kid. He goes down the slides with us. He climbs on the stuff with us. He does all of that with us.
- 1:06:26And truly, it made me want to get emotional because it's like the greatest compliment I can receive from them is to see that I have removed these dark layers. Think of a boat with all the things on the bottom, right? I'm clipping all this stuff off to just glide through the water like the kids do. They glide through life.
- 1:06:45And that's my goal. And even yesterday, we were with a bunch of kids, and they were trying to catch me. Like, we played tag for 30 minutes, and it's kids that were like seven and below, six of them. And they were just like, half were going one way, half the other way, and I'm dodging them and diving them and going around. And all the other parents were like, this is great. They're going to be so tired. Like, thank you. We don't need any babysitters. Like, he's wearing them out. But I was having fun. And I think we become so calcified in this version because of the stress, because of the whatever, right?
- 1:07:13Or because we have unresolved stuff from our childhood. Like, it's all of those things. And what about people that are just not super interested in that? It's a really good question. So what about people who aren't interested in it? Let's get away from all my, like, childlike stuff. Yeah, because you naturally like that stuff. Dude, it hurts. Going into these issues, whether they're from my childhood or whether it's a kid pointing a button...
- 1:07:36Now I've become acquainted like working out. No, but okay, wait a second. Wait, wait. So let's say you have the girl that wants to... You have two girls only, right? The father that has two girls, and they just want to play dolls. And...
- 1:07:52They want to play dolls for three hours. I'm like, okay, I'm cool playing for 15 minutes, but Jesus. I think there's a lot of ways to answer this. I have three girls, right? They do have interest in dolls. The dolls come with us to the park.
- 1:08:08They don't have interest to dolls. Yeah, they do. They went to American Girl Doll. They bought their little dolls with their dogs. But they're not the typical. The typical, I mean, that they are like building the castle. It's very... Well, because here's the point. Does the doll need a castle? You need to show this.
- 1:08:25Because it's so hard to, I think that you don't understand. Try to answer my question. What happens with people that are not that interested? It's a limiting belief. All right, cool. Okay, pause there. Fantastic. Do you agree that there are people that are business people, entrepreneurs that are interested in different things? So some are more artistic, some are more operational.
- 1:08:49Some are more investors, let's say, allocating resources and so on. Meaning the area, let's say the artistic one, they can do that all day long. They love it. Incredible. Now you put them into the allocating resources, the investor part or the operational part. Oh my gosh, this is extremely consuming. So wouldn't you be able to say the same thing here with the kids? Let's keep running with your theme.
- 1:09:18You still are running a business. A talented person who is excited by the mission and the company, there is work for them to do, right? That uses their superpower. It's the same with kids. So my kids, let's just use one example. We're down in Florida, we got a place here. There was like some mold under this outdoor carpet or mildew or something, just it's out in the sun and blah, blah, blah.
- 1:09:40We flip it up and I'm like, hey, let's get rid of this. The kids are having a blast. My daughters are spraying it with a hose. My son's spraying it with some cleaner solution. Then they're scrubbing. I didn't tell them they had to do it. They just wanted to join in. They wanted to be part of that. And I think this is the underestimation is you can find alignment with your kids of things. They want to be around you. They spell love, T-I-M-E. It's time. They want to be with their parents. They want to be seen as useful.
- 1:10:06They want to be doing it. It doesn't have to be following their lead of, I want to play with dolls and blah, blah, blah. But one, toys, I think, is mostly a scam. So, like, toys is an issue by itself. Only existed for 200 years. Toys are a complete scam. I feel very strongly about this, and we've gotten rid of almost all the toys in our house.
- 1:10:25All right. So that's why your kids were so bored. Now I understand. That is such a good – but let's come back to the core statement to me is you as a dad – I think this is a really important thing that if I'm listening as I'm a dad and I'm questioning all these things. You have a choice.
- 1:10:43Are you stressed out in your home with your kids or not? This is the two roads, right? Yes. There's a stressed road. There's a not stressed. So I'm taking that side. You be the dad. Yes, I'm stressed. Yes. You are stressed. If you are stressed, why? What is the reason you are stressed, Pablo? Papa Pablo?
- 1:11:03Okay, how introspective am I, Peter? You're like the middle of the road dude. Billy Joe. Maybe you've got a small business. Not Billy Joe, but Billy. Billy. You're Billy Joe. Billy. Just good old Billy Joe. Mid-manager at the Bank of America branch. Yes. Jesus. Mid-manager at the branch. But maybe you actually love your job. Like, here's the whole thing. No, that's a different Billy. Okay. Okay.
- 1:11:27You're right. You're not Billy Joe who loves being the manager. I'm not Billy Joe. This is Billy. Billy's mid-manager. You're Billy. Let's own it now. You are Billy. We won't even use the word. Yeah, I'm Billy, overweight, mid-manager. Okay, Billy, are you stressed or not stressed with your kids? I'm stressed with my kids. I'm stressed with my job. What do you think causes you the most stress when you're around your kids? I don't have any Bitcoin.
- 1:11:54Billy, this is a great thought. Let's just put a pin in that and we'll come back to that. It is fascinating that you work in the banking industry of Bank of America, yet you're curious about Bitcoin. Are you a zero coiner? You know what? Let's come back to that. Okay. What was your question? Are you stressed with your kids? Yes.
- 1:12:16Do you yell at your kids? Here and there, yes. Okay. What do you think the underlying reason is that you get stressed or yell at them? They just never stop. So much energy. Sometimes they're a pain in the ass. I mean, I love them. I mean, I love them, but they're a pain in the ass sometimes. You know, I'm just working all the time, and I just want to come and relax. How would you feel if you weren't yelling at them? Would you feel better?
- 1:12:44That's not possible. I need to. Because I need to. I mean, not all the time, but it's... You know, sometimes things get agitated. It's just...
- 1:12:51Do they understand? And do you understand what's agitating? Like when they do something, does it make sense to you why that agitates you? Give me a random example of them agitating you. Just watching the game, trying to have a nice evening, watching the game. They know that I like the game. Yeah, they just come. They start jumping in the sofas. I told them, don't jump in the sofas. You got it at the discount store, and they're just, I don't want to break them. Or the other day, they spilled the Coke in the bag.
- 1:13:21If you could have more fun doing something with them than watching the game and it reduced your stress as a parent, would you choose that route?
- 1:13:29Yes. Okay. So maybe you fixating on watching the game rather than spending time with them. Do you think maybe they just want your attention? Yes. Maybe. It doesn't look like, but maybe. Have you ever heard the phrase that kids spell love, T-I-M-E? No. What is that? Does that make sense? Why do they spell love as time? No.
- 1:13:54Because there's a deep fear in them that if they're not getting the attention or don't know how to get the attention of their parents, then they might not be able to survive. That's our survival instinct as children that are dependent on an adult to survive. So what do you mean that they spell? They spell love. They spell it time, meaning the word love to them is just time. It's just the time with their parents. Time with the parent. Yes. So what does that mean? Let's just look at just the game.
- 1:14:22If I'm a kid and all I want is to one, know that I can survive and get my dad's attention and two, love from my parent is spelled time, T I M E. Could the game, my goal of your goal of watching the game versus their goal of confirming those two things. Could that be the collision, the stressor? Yeah. But if that's the case, then they want my time all the time. And, and I also want to have free time. Again, I'm working all the time and then it looks like I'm also working at home.
- 1:14:51Yeah, so I guess that's a good question. And we didn't even touch on Susie, which is a different story. If Susie... I don't know if that's a good name, but whatever. Let's pause on Susie. Let's just start with you. Are you the man of the house, Billy? Yes. Okay. So if you had a choice to be stressed that day or not...
- 1:15:16And it all comes down to the game. What's more important to you? Not being stressed or watching the game? Which one do you pick? I can only choose one? Yes. I don't want to be stressed. Okay. There's no solution, only trade-offs. Okay. So you've now decided to remove yourself from the game. Because I am trying to watch the game to de-stress.
- 1:15:34Correct. Drinking my bad light. This is beautiful, man. What other things do you do to de-stress, Billy? I jerk off a lot. Billy, I really appreciate your honesty. I have a whole topic. We'll put a pin in that one. This is the next day. Billy, I was there, man. 10 years old, found pornography until I was 27 every day. I feel you, brother. But let's... No, you don't feel me. You...
- 1:15:59Yeah, I'm not feeling you. I understand you. I see you. Okay, fantastic. I've been there. What other things do you do to de-stress, Billy? I have my cocktail, you know, in the afternoon. Yeah. In the evening. I like my food. Do you like making food? Say it again? Do you like making food? Do you like going to a park? Is there anything outside that you enjoy? Riding bikes, walking, playground, any of that stuff?
- 1:16:28Dude, I'm working in Bank of America, coming back home, just want to chill in the sofa. What do you have any hobbies that create movement or that the kids might enjoy as well? Creates movement. I don't know what a baby would answer here. Do you like working out, Billy? Nah. Do you like mowing the grass? Do you like... I would prefer not to do it, but I have to do it. Oh, you have to. Okay. Have you heard of a limiting belief? We can get to that later.
- 1:16:57You have to do it. Do you think your kids would enjoy cutting the grass with you? How old are they? They are 8 and 10. Do you think the 10-year-old could cut the grass? Could they do it with you? He's in his phone all the time. So it sounds like he's choosing the phone as a way to potentially de-stress. That's adding stress. And you're choosing the game to potentially de-stress or hoping to de-stress. Yeah, but you know what? We're fine. We're fine. Did you say you're stressed? Ah, but it happens, you know? You know?
- 1:17:27It sounds like you're choosing the stress route. That's okay. If you want to choose that route, I'm here for you, Billy. This is your choice. All right. We can talk about my investments another day and Susie, okay? Dude, this is good. I mean, this is a good... Well, so here is the thing, right?
- 1:17:47This is a typical hospital intervention. Yeah. But here's the thing. We didn't clarify or you didn't ask me what are my goals. And that's why I was able to take you whatever I wanted. And you were trying very patiently. De-stressing is the goal, right? Because we did clarify. Do you want to take the stress route or do you want a day where you're not stressed? Yes, that was a great question.
- 1:18:09To me, that was the definition of the goal. You're right. I think I can add to say, what is your goal? Is it to not be stressed or be stressed? Because then we can keep coming back to the goal. I didn't say the word goal. Yeah, because I think that if you understand what's the goal and you like the goal and you agree with the goal, then you can keep asking me these A or B questions, like two multiple choices, like two possible answers questions, which leads me there. And you can keep answering jerk off.
- 1:18:37Do you want to de-stress? How? Do you want to be happy? How? I think the problem is when you talk about it, you're right and I agree with everything. But for most people, it's kind of like the iceberg. All we see is the little tiny tip that took down the Titanic, right? Right above the ocean. So here's the ocean. It's a tiny tip. It's all beneath that's what matters.
- 1:19:00It's the iceberg below the water that results in this tiny tip that visually is seen. Now, and I think that's where I struggle. Do I want to do this stuff? Maybe, right? I'm not excited by doing one-on-one calls with people and being like, hey, I'm going to be your coach. Not interesting. Now, creating content and kind of a framework similar to the post-execal paradox, post-wealth paradox that Anastasia is doing, that is interesting to me because if I can create the frameworks that are structured around...
- 1:19:29Because I have friends who are super enlightened in the business world and how they think about the world. And then I watch them with their kids. And I'm like, oof, there's so much stress and fear and tension. And they're fearing all the things that don't matter. And they're not fearing death. And by that, I'm saying they're not actually putting energy towards...
- 1:19:49They're probably enough. They don't know how many kids die. They don't know the most likely reasons. They don't know their own house. Are they cleaning chemicals? Is there water accessible? All of these things. Like those are really, really important. And then they flipped it. They're spending all their energy on things that aren't. And I think that it's just...
- 1:20:06repeating the same way that we were taught, let's say, or that we see others. So there's a lot of mimetic behavior here when parenting, at least that I am able to see. And I pay a lot of attention because I am also extremely interested in this topic.
- 1:20:22A friend of ours that did the Tony Robbins stuff with you, I did a talk with this guy and he did 90% of the talking, but I just kind of asked, like, he seems like an awesome dude and I love this parenting stuff. So it's like, I was like, yeah, well I'm doing this nonprofit. I spent a ton of time with my kids. You know, I have these goals, not yell and not lie to them and only ask questions. And he went, right? It was clear I had hit like a button and he was like, yeah, dude, I yell at my kids all the time. And 30 minutes in, he's like,
- 1:20:47I'm doing the same thing my dad did to me. Like you could see this revelation of like, that's what my dad yelled at me about. And now I'm yelling at my kid and I don't want to be that. And I didn't give him all the examples. I didn't nothing more than like that one sentence of here are my goals that I try and live by. And you could see it like unlatch something like something opened in his heart or his head or his body to be like, whoa.
- 1:21:11in himself like this is interesting to me and he could be a cool one actually because he was so interested in it it comes back to the iceberg it's like most of this stuff the answers are deep deep down below the water inside of us in those dark caves and bringing light shining them and our kids our ci agent kids are the ones that can uncover them better than anyone that's amazing all right brother let's wrap it up all right love you man see ya