Latest / Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald / Jimmy Fallon, Ashton Kutcher, and Substance Recovery with Joshua Reed

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Jimmy Fallon, Ashton Kutcher, and Substance Recovery with Joshua Reed · Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: From morning swims in Sandy Cove to coffee in Ranelagh
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• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Heather MacDonald. has got the Juicy Scoop. When you're on
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  Speaker 1: Listen in, listen up.
• 0:53
  Speaker 4: Woo woo.
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Hannah McDonald. Juicy Scoop. Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop. Guys, remember,
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: I'm coming to Sacramento September 29th and San Francisco September
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: 30th for two live juicy scoops. That's where the juiciest
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: scoop is, the funniest stuff. And you go to HeatherMcDonald.net
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: to get those tickets. You always go to HeatherMcDonald.net for everything. Patreon,
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: live tickets, all of it is there. Okay, let's talk
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: about this Jimmy Fallon story that happened over the weekend.
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: Different reports are coming out. Basically, a story was written
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: by Rolling Stone and they interviewed all these current staffers. Now,
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: the Jimmy Fallon Tonight Show has been on hold because
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: of the writer's strike since May. So there has been
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: all these months of the staff not getting together, maybe
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: reflecting on their lives. And then comes this Rolling Stone
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: reporter saying, hey, we're We're talking to a bunch of
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: other people and a bunch of other people that are
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: remaining nameless. We are going to protect their names so
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: they can remain anonymous. So, you know, so nobody gets retaliated.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: Of course, you don't want to, you know, bag on
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: Jimmy Fallon and then, you know, hopefully come back soon
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: when the strike is over. What do you think? All
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: these other people think it was awful. Was it harsh?
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: Whatever.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: And then these people are sitting at home and now
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: they've had several months away from the daily grind of
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: the show to kind of reflect on their experience. So
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: I believe what they're saying is 100% true. I've worked
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: on a late night show before, worked on TV. And
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: even though it's a comedy show and people are laughing
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: so hard through most days, it is stressful. The show
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: has to get done. You have one day to, you know,
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: a few hours to do it, to tape it. And
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: it's competitive and there's a high turnover rate. Yeah, and
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: when you're the showrunner or the writer or the star
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: of it, you're going to have good days and bad.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: And basically that's what they say, that Jimmy had good
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: days and bad. It was like walking on eggshells some days.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: You never knew which Jimmy you were going to get.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: And he, since hearing that the report was coming, did
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: like an emergency Zoom where everybody got on, and he
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: profusely apologized. part of the complaints was that it was
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: really about this one showrunner, this one particular woman, Jamie
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: Granette Biederman. Some of the comments about her was that
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: she ruined people's careers, that they left entertainment altogether, and
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: they believe that he, you know, was compliant and didn't,
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: you know, stop the abuse that they got from her.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: I just really think this is a really hard thing
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: to judge. And because it's such a coveted job, And
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: because you're so excited to finally get there, you do
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: have a lot of stress and anxiety. And it is
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: really hard for people. And they're not likely to quit
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: because it's not like you can just pop over to
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: another job. And if you do quit The Tonight Show
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: because you're like, well, I'm going to quit because you're
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: really stressing me out, Jimmy Fallon. But can you give
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: me a recommendation so I can write jokes for Jimmy Kimmel?
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's not like there's 35 late night shows
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: that you can go to. you know, or whatever your
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: job is there. So that's where the stress is. And,
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: you know, you become friends and you're working with people,
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: but you don't really know who your friend or your
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: frenemy is. That is Hollywood. That is why this honestly
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: is not like an overly shocking story. It's, you know,
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: we heard it about Ellen. We've heard it about other shows. Yeah, people,
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: you know, when the time comes and they reflect back,
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: they're like, this is what I loved about it. This
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: is Looking back, that was kind of effed up. I
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: wish it was different. I wish I would have spoken up.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: Why didn't the boss realize that this was going on and,
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: you know, either reprimand that supervisor or, you know, or
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: why didn't people stick up for each other? Because they
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: were scared if they stuck up for this person who
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: is being, you know, criticized or whatever, that then their
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: job would be in jeopardy. Honestly, even though it's Hollywood,
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: I think it's probably something a lot of people could
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: relate to in any kind of you know.
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: High.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: Powerful type of jobs or, you know, where there's a
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: lot at stake and where they're coveted positions and they're
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: hard to replace. You know, but then the persona is
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: someone being so happy and nice and funny, and I'm
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: sure they are, but even the happiest, funniest, sweetest, most
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: generous comedian, you know, can not have a perfect day.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: And just like someone who has a non- high-profile job,
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: may not have a perfect happy day. You know, saying
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: that you're walking on eggshells, I don't know. I remember
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: walking on eggshells sometimes in my own home with my
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: parents or with certain jobs. It just happens, and it's unfortunate,
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: but I think all of it's good. I predict that
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: they'll come back after this writer's strike. All these people
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: that spoke, you know, negatively about it, hopefully they'll come
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: back and they'll have a better perspective. He'll have a
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: better perspective. And now that it's out there, maybe it'll
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: even run better for another 10 years. I mean, hopefully
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: that's the case. Only one current employee did say that
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: it's such a stressful time in the entertainment and street
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: meeting the strike. I can understand how old experiences and
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: grievances can bubble back up, but none of this sounds
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: like the show that I've worked on for the past year,
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: give or take that. It's like the only quote that
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: I saw where someone was like, I don't hate it.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: I don't mind working there. But, you know, it went
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: on this other part of the article said, you know,
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: there were crying rooms where they'd go into the talent
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: dressing rooms so that they could shut the door and
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: be alone when the talent wasn't there and cry and
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: deal with the stress. And yeah, I think there is
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: a lot of crying in entertainment.
• 7:12
  Speaker 4: I do.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: Whether it's on a TV show or after you leave
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: an audition and get your car and cry. You're putting
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: yourself out there. It's a different kind of industry than,
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: you know, working in construction or whatever, you know, where
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: I don't think someone's saying those type of things to you.
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: And I don't think it's someone that goes into being
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: an engineer or something is a different type of person
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: than that goes in entertainment. So anyway, in summary, I'm
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: just not surprised this happened. One of the incidences was,
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: from 2017 and they alleged that he might've been drinking
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: that day or something. Jimmy Fallon. I don't know where
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: he is with, you know, substance abuse or whatever, but
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: those have always been rumors. Um, again, he's been off
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: the air for a while. Hopefully everyone comes back and
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: is funny and good. Um, this was interesting. Uh, this
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: came up, this was, um, Amy Poehler in Tina Fey's book,
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: Tina Fey has a great book. If you have not
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: read her autobiography, it's so good. And it really is
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: a lot about women and sticking up for yourselves and
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: entertainment and also having her perspective at her age of
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: like what we go through or went through and looking
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: at it in today's lens of the way it is
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: for women. And she said, and the story just mentioned Jimmy,
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: but I don't really think it was about Jimmy, but
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: they were at SNL. And Amy Poehler was new to
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: the cast. And she said some, you know, dirty joke
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: or something. And Jimmy Fallon kind of scolded her for
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: that joke. And she rolled her seat over to him.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: And she was like, I don't care what you think.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: I'm going to keep doing it. And the point of
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: Tina writing about it was, yeah, we're not going to
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: be scolded by these men or whatever. We're all on
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: the same level. We're all working on this show together.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: And she kind of nipped that in the bud. So
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: pulling that story out now maybe looks like Jimmy a
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: little negatively, but I think it was more giving props
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: to Amy and letting, and follow Amy's steps if you're
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: a woman and nip it in the bud and say
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: right then, like, I don't give a shit. I'm here.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: I can say whatever joke I want to say, just
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: like you can. And just because I'm a woman, like,
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to be set to a different standard.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: So that was cool. All right, I haven't talked much
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: about this, but Summer House, a very popular show on
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: Bravo TV, obviously. And Lindsay and Carl were a couple there.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: Summer House is a show where every summer they took
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: these like 20, 30-year-olds and they would rent a summer
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: house in the Hamptons and follow their lives. It's been many,
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: many years. Couples have come, gone, broken up, hooked up.
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: And Lindsay and Carl have been two of the originals.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: And it started that they were just platonic friends. They
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: had different boyfriends, girlfriends. And then they all of a
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: sudden announced they were in love and shortly after got engaged.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: And their wedding was set for this November 17th. And
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: just two weeks ago, Lindsay had posted photos from her
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: bridal shower, garden-themed bridal shower, in which Carl showed up
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: at the end like a lot of fiancés do with
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: flowers and everything. Well, shortly after that is when it
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: was announced that they are not getting married. They have
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: broken up. And it was Carl who broke up with Lindsay. Now,
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: it was filmed for the show. We know that. So
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: this is very much Vanderpump, Scandival 2. And a lot
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: of people wondering why. Why was the breakup? Was it
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: because he was sober and he didn't think she was
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: respecting his sobriety? What was the reason? Was this even
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: a real romance? Was this all for the show because
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: they were friends? He just wrote a letter to his
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: friends and family, in which I guess people got a
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: hold of, in which he apologized for it. He said,
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: we will cover any expenses or costs that any of
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: the guests might have endured that they can't get back
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: because of the wedding being a couple months. Really respectful.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: I feel horrible to Lindsay, but still not really explaining why.
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: So I'm sure we'll see on the show. They still
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: follow each other. Neither of them deleted each other's photos
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: from their Instagram.
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: And I.
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: Mean, I personally just think that, you know, marriage is real.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: And I really think something happened where you just have
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: that moment when people call off weddings. Most people don't.
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: Most people, the people I know that got divorced within
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: like a couple years of their wedding I would ask
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: them and they're like, oh, I knew before I walked
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: down the aisle.
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: I knew.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: Why did you get married? I mean, I just, I
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: figured it would get better. I thought I'd put the,
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: you know, behind. So I think, yeah, I mean, I
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: think he really thought about it and was like, I
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: don't want to spend the rest of my life with
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: this person. I don't see this going. This is not
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: what I want. I don't want it for eternity. And
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: I don't think it's right for me. And Imagine anybody
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: who ends a wedding early, whether it's Kim Kardashian. I mean,
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: Kim Kardashian, before her 73-day wedding with Chris Humphries, her
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: mom said, you don't have to do this. Chris said,
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: you do not have to do this. I know we've paid.
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: I know the world is watching. I know we're filming it,
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: but this doesn't seem right. Several people said it to
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: her and she was like, no, no, it'll be right.
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: You convince yourself. Because you can't imagine canceling something like this. Now,
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: just think of just a regular person canceling their wedding. Now,
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: you have all these public figures coming to your show.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: You have the whole Bravo world watching, rooting you on,
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: the show, all of it. And he chose to say no.
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: I think it's juicy. I think it's sad. But I
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: also think it's Pretty admirable, really, not to just go
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: through with it and be like, well, we can always
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: get divorced because, no, you're wasting her time. She wants
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: to have kids. So it always seems like, though, people
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: never call off the wedding but then stay dating. I mean,
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: that would be pretty weird if they were like, we
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: just don't want to get married, but we're going to
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: still be a couple. So I don't think they're still
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: going to be a couple. But there you go. Well,
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Danny Masterson has been sentenced to 30 years, um, for
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: sexual assault. And he was part of that 70 show.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: And there were three accusers. Um, but he was convicted
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: on two of the accusers and 15 years for each.
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: And they are going to be, um, consecutive, not concurrent.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: So meaning he has to do all the 30 years. Um,
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: But there were letters that were sent by his co-stars
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: from that 70s show, Ashton Kutcher and his wife, Mila. And,
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: you know, just saying he was always a great friend
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: and admirable to me and everything. And the Internet did
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: not like that. They were really disturbed that they would
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: send out that they would have these letters and they
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: felt that it was not being supportive of sexual assault victims.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: Then more stuff came out in which a lot of
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: creators and his one of the– her name is Chrissy
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: Carnell Bixler. She was one of the accusers of Danny.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: She was a former girlfriend of his way back in
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: 2001 when they were doing the show. And she's coming forward,
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: you know, showing– sharing clips of Ashton with Mila when
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: she was under age and putting a lot out there
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: to make people question all of, all of their involvement.
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: And in the fact that, um, there was, there was
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: an incident, there was a horrible crime that happened with
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: Ashton Kutcher. He was dating a girl who was killed
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: and he was part of that trial. And there are
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: reports about like, you know, Did he do everything correctly
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: on discovery of this woman that was killed? And does
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: Danny Masterson have anything to do with it in Scientology,
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: which Danny is one? And, you know, did Ashton do
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: everything right? So people are now getting into this and
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: exploring it and being, you know, really critical, which they
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: have every right to do.
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: And it looks like Danny's probably setting up to appeal
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: as well. So we're going to have to go through
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: this again. But so that was going on all this
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: weekend as well. This was interesting. This is a clip
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: from Conan O'Brien that Page Six pulled. Oh, no, sorry.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: New York Post pulled up. where he's on Conan and
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: Danny Masterson says, oh, this guy does an impression of me.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: And he says, I'm Danny Masterson. Touch my balls. And
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: Conan's like, really? That's the impression? I think you're going
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: to get caught one day. And then there was a
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: little thing like, wow, Conan did one time write for
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: The Simpsons. And you know how everybody thinks that The
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: Simpsons predict the future of the world and pop culture.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: just interesting that all these things are resurfacing, whether they're clips,
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: whether they're meaningless, you know, meaningless things or not, they're
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: being resurfaced thanks to the internet and thanks to different
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: creators and people are examining them. And so Ashton and
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: Mila did make a statement saying, we support the victims.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: We were just asked to speak on our friend and
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: our experience with our friend Danny was this, and that's
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: what we wrote about and nothing else. So there you go.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: This is going on.
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: So this Spanish soccer president, Luis Rubeles, I know I'm
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: saying it wrong. The team won, the female soccer team won.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: And as they were going through and with the coaches
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: and everything, He took this one girl and he kissed her, really.
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: He hugged her and he kissed her on the face like, mwah.
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: And people right away were like, we don't think this
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: is cool. And so now he is maintaining his innocence.
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: He has resigned from his position, but he is set
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: to stand trial by Spanish prosecutors are taking him to court.
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: And if he's convicted, he could face a fine of
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: up to four years in prison. So, um, you know,
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: he's saying it was a consensual kiss, but Jennifer, the
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: woman that he kissed is saying no. I think this
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: is like really, um, it's really interesting because, you know,
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: it's not in America and the stand that they're taking.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: And I think she has every right to be like, no,
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: I didn't like it. It did freak me out. And, um,
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: There's a lot of things as women that happen. I
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: just mentioned one with, you know, Amy Poehler, where you're like, no,
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: that was wrong. Or maybe you look back and you
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: didn't say anything about it. You know, I was just
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: speaking to my sister and she said, you know, one
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: time many years ago, another attorney, when she was in court,
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: somehow she must've mentioned she went to Catholic school or something.
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: And he said, ooh, I'd like to see you in your,
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: Catholic school uniforms. And she's like co-counsel or something and
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: an adult and married and a woman. And she's like,
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: ha ha, and just continues. But like now looks back
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: at that. It was like, that was really fucking gross
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: and inappropriate. And, you know, so I think it's really,
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: I think this is good. You know, I don't think
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: this guy deserves four years in prison in my personal opinion.
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: Probably resigning is the right thing to do. The car
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: is beautiful. Where did you end up going for it?
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: This exclusive place that Dad has connections with. They have
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: more cars for more dealerships than like anywhere else.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: You have to put me in touch.
• 20:28
  Speaker 5: What's it called?
• 20:29
  Speaker 4: It's Dune ADL.
• 20:31
  Speaker 5: Where?
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Dune ADL. There's an accent on the E. Do you mean... Yes,
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: I got it on Done Deal Cars. Lyft, please. You're
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: going past Kimmage?
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: Oh, Kimmage.
• 20:43
  Speaker 5: No.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: Done Deal Cars.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: You couldn't possibly go anywhere else.
• 20:48
  Speaker 5: I'm Darman, and this is What Happens Next. Each week
• 20:51
  Speaker 5: on the show, I sit down with extraordinary people who
• 20:55
  Speaker 5: have faced tremendous setbacks. And yet somehow have found a
• 20:59
  Speaker 5: way to turn them into their greatest strengths.
• 21:02
  Speaker 4: Life is one long lesson of chaos. I'm heading to
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: the Emmys and I have police complaints filed against me.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: When your free will was about to be taken from you,
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: what would you do if it was given back?
• 21:13
  Speaker 5: Where did that need come from where you thought that
• 21:16
  Speaker 5: you had to succeed in order to feel loved?
• 21:18
  Speaker 4: He said, I have a work dad.
• 21:19
  Speaker 5: I need a home dad.
• 21:20
  Speaker 4: What happens next?
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: When I came in, he started crying.
• 21:23
  Speaker 4: Everybody in life encounters hardships.
• 21:25
  Speaker 5: What defines them is not those hard moments that they
• 21:29
  Speaker 5: go through.
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: It's about what happens next.
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: I decided to risk it all. I realized how valuable
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: every day was.
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: You're worth the work.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: Listen, Dara, I'm not going to pull punches.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: You can use your voice even if it's shaped.
• 21:40
  Speaker 5: The stories are different, but the impact is the same.
• 21:43
  Speaker 5: Only one question matters. What happens next?
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: Okay, this I'm super excited about, you guys. A Juicy
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: Scooper sent this to me. Netflix is, I guess this
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: was revealed in Sundance. It is going to be on Netflix,
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: and it is called May December, and it is about
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: Mary Kay Letourneau, the most famous teacher who not only
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: dated her male student who was 13 at the time,
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: but got impregnated by him, went to prison, got out
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: of prison, and got pregnant again by him, and then
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: went back to prison for seven years, then got out
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: of prison while his mom raised the two daughters, and
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: he was just a teenager, and then they got married
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: and raised their kids together until she passed away a
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: couple years ago of cancer. They are doing a movie
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: about this on Netflix. And Julianne Moore plays the teacher.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: And Natalie Portman plays the woman who is going to
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: be playing her in the movie version. So she goes
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: and interviews her and everything. Oh, my God. I cannot
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: wait for this. And when is it coming out? I
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: don't know. Can't come out soon enough for me. This
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: is one of those juicy crime type of stories that
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: I've just been fascinated with and that is happening.
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: Kevin Federline is, according to TMZ, possibly may seek more
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: child support from Brittany because the older boy is going
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: to be 18 and the younger one won't be 18
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: until I think June of 2025. And because he has
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: them full-time, the $ 40, 000 a month was based on them
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: splitting the time. But now that he has them full-time,
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: he may seek more child support from her. Unfortunately, she
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: really is not spending any time, certainly no sleepovers or anything.
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: And I think it's been a long time since she's
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: seen him. And I believe he moved to Hawaii with them.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: And she is continuing. The Brown pumps her back and she's...
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: doing some really kind of crazy dances to Madonna's song,
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: I'm Addicted. And Madonna has said that she wants her
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: to come on tour with her. She is going through
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: a divorce. She was seen in Mexico at a bar
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: out in public and people filming her in a red
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: dress and white boots and sunglasses, just looking like she
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: was having fun. So we'll see. Like I said, I
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: cannot wait to read the book. Bianca Kanye's wife, they
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: are saying now that allegedly her loved ones cannot get
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: a hold of her. They're not in contact with her.
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: They are concerned. The latest outfit, she's still in Italy.
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: She's wearing the nylons, you know, from the egg, the
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: legs egg that you would get. And she pulls it
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: all the way up to her boobs. And then is
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: now holding a purple velvet pillow from like your grandma's couch,
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: walking around Italy like that in a pair of Lucite shoes.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: And that's what she's doing. I don't understand it. I
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: worry for this girl more than anything. The Kardashian clan
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: is not commenting, staying out of it. They're probably just
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: glad that he's in another country and they're not showing
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: up like that for St. Soccer game in Hidden Hills.
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: I don't know, but I would, like I've said, I'd
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: be very concerned if this, what, unless this girl, the
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: only thing that would make me feel better is if
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: I was friends with this girl or was her sister
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: and she was calling me and being like, oh my God,
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: did you see me with a pillow? Are you dying?
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: I am loving all the press I'm getting. No, we
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: have a whole big plan. Sis, don't worry about, I'm
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: coming out with a, we're bringing back new nylons for one. Um,
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: And they're going to be all the rage. And I
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: have a stake in it. I have 51% of the
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: nude nylon Kanye line. And I'm so excited. And I
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: only have to walk around in these weird outfits for
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: like another three weeks. And then I'm coming back to LA, girl.
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: We are going out to dinner. And you're going to
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: see this whole plan worked out. Do not worry about me.
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: That would be the only way I think anyone in
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: her family or friends could not be overly concerned with
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: what the hell is happening here. I want to talk
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: about Real Housewives of Atlanta because even if you didn't
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: watch it, something kind of crazy juicy happened. There's this girl, Drew,
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: on it. She actually was in White Chicks. She's an
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: actress and she is a singer. And she was kind
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: of like didn't have much going on in the first
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: couple seasons. I believe this is her third season. She's
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: had issues with her husband, Ralph. And they share one
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: child together. And then she has another child from a
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: previous marriage. And she wanted him to adopt that child.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: And he didn't. And that bothered her because he said, well,
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: the dad's already involved. But Ralph seems real thirsty. And
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: it gets revealed on the reunion that they're separate or
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: getting divorced. And Drew goes, you've cheated on me for years.
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: You've had all these other women. Here is a screen,
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: you know, a screen grab from this woman who has
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: a photo of her sexy ass or whatever. And it says,
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: I can't, when are you going to bring that D
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: over to me? And it went to Ralph, her husband,
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: and now she has it. And he's like, that's a catfish.
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: That is a catfish. I don't know who that person is.
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: I don't know what this is. And a lot of
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: people were like, oh my God, Ralph, you're lying. You're lying.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: But I'm like, you know what? You know, Is he faithful? Likely,
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: probably not. But could people do this? Could people send
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: stuff like that to these reality stars that they're so
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: invested in their life and like DM Drew and be like,
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: my friend is dating Ralph. Here's the proof from when
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: she texted him. And now she has this. Like, where
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: is this real woman? Where is, you know, them in
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: a hotel room together. Like when, um, Ashley Darby, we
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: saw the photos of her man with someone from Potomac.
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: I don't know, but he's sitting there. Um, she gets
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: up and gets upset. He just sits there. Then we
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: find out that he's trying to be on like Thunder
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: Down Under in Las Vegas. So I just think he's
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: a real thirsty dude. And then, and he's producing her
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: music And then after she's crying her eyes out that
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: the marriage is over, that he's a cheater, that he's
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: humiliating her on TV, gaslighting her, saying like, you're having
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: a lesbian affair. And she's like, no, I'm not. You're
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: the one who's cheated on me with all these women
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: all these years. She comes back and she's like, but
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: before we end the three-part reunion, I'm going to sing
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: my song that Ralph, I think, produced. And she stands up.
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: She's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. You, you didn't want to
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: help me. You didn't want to keep our family together.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: You left the counseling. And she's singing while he's sitting there.
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: And I am like, I don't even know what I'm
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: watching right now. Like, I don't know if this is
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: the most real thing or the fakest thing I have
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: ever seen. And are Drew and Ralph actually in on
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: this to get this song to the top and Or
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: I mean, maybe they aren't in love, but maybe they're friends.
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: Maybe they're friends and business partners. And they're like, look,
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: let it flow. Be mad at me. But then you're
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: going to come out here and you're going to sing
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: this song like you can. Because then he goes, Drew's
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: a great talent. I've always known that. I'm really excited
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: for her singing career. As she's standing singing, it was honestly,
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: it was pretty weird. And I'm surprised more people are
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: not thinking that they're like in cahoots, she and Ralph. But,
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: you know, she's on the show for next season, that's
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: for sure. I'd be shocked if they gave her the boot.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: And meanwhile, this is Drew. I'm sorry, this is Ralph.
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: And Drew's sister yelling at this other girl, Courtney. And
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: Courtney came on the show as Ralph's cousin to just, like,
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: literally say all these awful things about Drew. And I'm like,
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: is Drew part of it? Like, it's very much the
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: way people thought. Like, it was Sandoval. Was that planned
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: or whatever? Or is Carl and Lindsay planned? I don't know.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: Sit back and enjoy because there is some messiness happening
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: and lives are being destroyed and marriages are being destroyed
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: more than I've ever seen in the franchises in general,
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: like really, quite honestly. But it's pretty juicy. Oh, speaking
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: of Sandoval, the rumor is You know how Schwartz and
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: Sandy complained about their partner, Greg something, who is their
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: partner at Schwartz and Sandy's? Supposedly, he has not allowed
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: any filming at the restaurant, which I'm shocked by why
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: he wouldn't want that kind of advertising. But the rumor
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: is that he said no, and he doesn't want Sandoval there,
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: and he wants Sandoval out of the business. I don't
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: know why you would do that. I mean, listen, people
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: are already over it. He's already been seen with several
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: different girls. It seems like people are going there. But
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I mean, if I had a restaurant
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: that was based on Vanderpump rules, I would want the
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: filming to be there. But that's the rumor that he
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: doesn't want the filming to be there. Amy Schumer got
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: in trouble because she did a post and she took
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: a used one of the photos of Nicole Kidman like
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: sitting like she's just sitting like this watching um the U.S.
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: Open and Amy wrote this is how humans um this
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: is how humans sit she had to take it down
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: people thought she was bullying and I don't know it's
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: kind of a weird time like where you're a comedian
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: and you know but you're a high profile comedian like
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: Amy and you just thought that was funny. Like we
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: used to make fun of celebrities and we used to like,
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: you know, that's what we would do on these late
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: night shows and everything that we don't see anymore. And
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: we certainly used to do it on my day of
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: Chelsea lately, a lot more than people do now. And,
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: you know, she is so perfect and everything. So I
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: think she was just, you know, kind of mocking the
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: fact that also when you, I will say when you
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: are a certain age, it is kind of nice to
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: go like this because then you cover your neck. And
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: you know that the cameras are on you while you're
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: watching the tennis. So you're just like this. And she
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: just kind of called her out on it. But then
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: people examine it and they're like, well, you're really famous, Amy.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: And so is she. So why are you calling this
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: other woman out that isn't like so much above you?
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: Like you're almost like Amy's too good to be doing that.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: Which maybe Amy realizes, oh, I guess I can't make
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: jokes about these people anymore. Oh, well, fine.
• 33:47
  Speaker 4: Fine.
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: She probably won't. After this, she's probably like, oh, fuck it.
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: You know, I thought I was coming up with a
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: funny joke and throwing something up for someone's amusement. I
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: don't need to do these jokes. Like, I don't need
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: this kind of shit. You can just come see my
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: show and see me live. Like, I'm not making money
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: off a post about Nicole Kidman. Uh, Kim and Kroy,
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: they're back together. This is like, they filed down twice
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: and now they're back together and, um, You know, this
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: is like the David Bedore situation where he keeps breaking
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: up with Leslie Bedore, but then they're back together. I
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: just got a report that they were out having dinner,
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: looking miserable. You know, who knows and who cares? But
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: these people, you know, they got to live together. And
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: then Elon Musk had his third baby with Grimes, and
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: it's called Techno. Whatever. All right, you guys. I'm excited
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: to tell you about a really interesting interview I have.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: And it's kind of a different way of approaching addiction
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: and people that have addictions and all like the spectrum
• 34:53
  Speaker 2: of it. And I thought it was really interesting, my
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: friend Joshua's concept and his business. And I wanted to
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: share it with you and his story being that he
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: comes from a celebrity background and how he recovered and
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: what he's doing to help others. And now for this interview.
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: I have a very juicy interview right here sitting in
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: front of me. Joshua Reed. Welcome to Juicy Scoop. Thank you.
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: You have a story. You have plenty of stories to
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: tell from fashion to celebrities to drug addiction and what
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: is going on with celebrities. And welcome. Good to have
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: you here from Miami.
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: I'm so happy to be here. Good. I'm a fan.
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: Oh, thank you.
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: I've never watched, but I listen.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: That's okay.
• 35:38
  Speaker 4: And when the housewives come on, I listen anyway, but
• 35:41
  Speaker 4: I don't know any housewives at all. I actually went
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: to stay in Vegas. I went and I stayed with
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: Jill Zarin with a friend of mine.
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: Jill Zarin.
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: And Jill said to me, you don't know who I am,
• 35:50
  Speaker 4: do you? And I said, no. And she said, you're lying.
• 35:53
  Speaker 4: Are you gay? And I said, yeah. She goes to me,
• 35:55
  Speaker 4: you're lying. And I was dead serious. I had no
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: idea who she was. I don't know who any housewives are.
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: I've never watched an episode.
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: I'm very close to Jill Zarin, and I'm sure that
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: probably ruined her weekend.
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: She was really sweet. She was with her husband at
• 36:07
  Speaker 4: the time.
• 36:08
  Speaker 5: Bobby.
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: He passed away, right? Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah.
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he was a sweetheart. They would do Vegas a lot.
• 36:13
  Speaker 4: They were, yeah. They were really very, very nice.
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: Well, we know each other through, wait, I'm just going
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: to say how we know each other. We know each
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: other with my friend who's sitting here in the studio
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: audience of one We have George Perez. I like to
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: call him Jorge.
• 36:32
  Speaker 4: I call him George.
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: Well, I was introduced to you as Jorge, so I
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: don't call him George.
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it switches around.
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: It switches around a lot. And he represented and represents
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: photographers and all this stuff. And that's how I met you.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: And I went to this party for the gents party.
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: We were launching with Kitson. It was a retail launch.
• 36:53
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: So I remember going to that party. That was a
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: fun party.
• 36:57
  Speaker 4: We also, I remember specifically meeting in his kitchen. I
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: think we went out to dinner, but I don't think
• 37:00
  Speaker 4: you remember that.
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: No, I do. I remember going to like a cool,
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: like West Hollywood.
• 37:06
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 37:06
  Speaker 4: That's what we did.
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: Condo party.
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah. That's all. I remember being in the kitchen, you know,
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: times are foggy for me too back then.
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: So let's, so let's get into a little bit about
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: your life. You had mentioned You got started a long
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: time ago and you at Calvin Klein and you took
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: over Carolyn Bissett's job.
• 37:25
  Speaker 4: So Carolyn started the job. She was working out of
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: the store and it morphed into a corporate job, celebrity director.
• 37:33
  Speaker 4: There was somebody in between me and her, another girl
• 37:36
  Speaker 4: that had a job. She started trusting me to do
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: these fittings with celebrities and my boss noticed. And then
• 37:41
  Speaker 4: he promoted me to celebrity director on the men's side.
• 37:44
  Speaker 4: So there was someone else to handle it for the women's,
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: but I would do all the men's fittings, all the
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: celebrity partnerships, traveling with the talent, you know, for the
• 37:51
  Speaker 4: underwear campaigns, going to Milan for the shows, events, all
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: the dressing, red carpet dressing, coming to LA for a
• 37:57
  Speaker 4: few months during award season, dressing all the celebrities on
• 38:00
  Speaker 4: the men's side.
• 38:01
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: And so you were saying one of the things that
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: you did that kind of like really kind of changed
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: fashion and opportunity is since this is New York Fashion
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: Week and we're seeing all the stars there. Something that
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: you did was getting these high-profile men who are into fashion,
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: getting them in the fashion at the fashion show sitting
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: in the front row.
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so my job was very niche. Like I said,
• 38:26
  Speaker 4: it was the men's side of the whole business of
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: Calvin Klein globally. So you were seeing all the women's
• 38:32
  Speaker 4: runway shows. They had all the talent, celebrities, whatever you
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: want to call them. No one was really doing it
• 38:36
  Speaker 4: on the men's side. So we did a men's show.
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: I talked to my boss. I told him I wanted
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: to load it with celebrities. with talent that I really
• 38:42
  Speaker 4: respected that represented the brand. I handpicked everyone. We did it.
• 38:47
  Speaker 4: And yeah, since then people come up to me all
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: the time that work at different fashion houses and say,
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: I had that on my bulletin board. We did that.
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: Now it's, it's really common. Yeah.
• 38:56
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: That's really cool.
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So this was when, um, Jared.
• 39:01
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: Chase.
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: And what year is this around?
• 39:04
  Speaker 4: Um, so 2000, it was probably 2009. I started in 2007,
• 39:06
  Speaker 4: got the, Promoted to the celebrity job 2009, two years in.
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 39:12
  Speaker 4: So I would say around 2009. Jared, Chase, Ryan, Phil V,
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: Kellen Lutz, who was in the underwear campaign at the time,
• 39:19
  Speaker 4: and he was in Twilight at the time. He was huge.
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: So now I want to talk to you a little
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: bit about, because then you in all these, you, let's
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: just go back to these hot guys. So now let's
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: talk about the journey that you've taken your struggles and
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: that you're managed to have all these jobs and all
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: these things, but you also became addicted to prescription drugs
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: and everything. And I just kind of want to hear
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: how that happened. Like, were you you know, there's so many,
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: everybody has a different story. So just tell me, what
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: is your story? Like as a kid, when was your
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: first time you had a sip of alcohol? 15.
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: Um, I was, I was in the closet. So I
• 40:02
  Speaker 4: was gay. I remember feeling, um, uh, like a relief,
• 40:06
  Speaker 4: a little relief in my head of kind of what
• 40:10
  Speaker 4: was weighing over me a lot. Um, but it wasn't,
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: It didn't– it wasn't like I had alcohol, sip alcohol
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: and that was it and I loved alcohol. Alcohol really
• 40:20
  Speaker 4: for me was never– it kind of went along with things. Right.
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: Hand in hand but it wasn't really the problem.
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 40:27
  Speaker 4: But yeah, I did– I think I did drugs very socially,
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: casually growing up and then in college.
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: And what were the drugs you did growing up in
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: high school and college?
• 40:38
  Speaker 4: In high school– yeah, sorry.
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: No, that's okay.
• 40:40
  Speaker 4: In high school, pot. Pot, acid once. That's it. Pills,
• 40:48
  Speaker 4: like Xanax.
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: That was common in high school.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: And where would people get those?
• 40:54
  Speaker 4: God, I have no idea.
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: Someone to spring them to the party. And you'd mix
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: the Xanax with alcohol?
• 41:00
  Speaker 4: Uh-huh, yeah, for sure.
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: And what kind of high gives you that?
• 41:03
  Speaker 4: Just relax, extra relaxed.
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 41:05
  Speaker 4: You know, what a Xanax does for you, intense pride.
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: I don't know, I've never had a Xanax.
• 41:08
  Speaker 4: You've never had a Xanax? No, never. Oh, it just
• 41:10
  Speaker 4: relaxes you. Okay. Yeah.
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: And so then... Okay, so then you're starting to work
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: in fashion and stuff. And at that point, you're still
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: just a social partier.
• 41:20
  Speaker 4: So I did exceed socially in college, for sure. Yeah.
• 41:24
  Speaker 4: But maybe Xanax, whatever, wouldn't happen. But everything, you know,
• 41:28
  Speaker 4: it was just totally on a social level. It was
• 41:32
  Speaker 4: never problematic. From 20 to 27, I had two boyfriends
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: back to back. We never used any drugs, ever. never, um,
• 41:43
  Speaker 4: and then, and drank socially. That's it. I can't even,
• 41:47
  Speaker 4: not even like at home. I think it was just
• 41:49
  Speaker 4: when we went out. Yeah. Um, then, yeah. And then
• 41:53
  Speaker 4: I started using cocaine at like 27.
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: And how did that happen?
• 41:58
  Speaker 4: Someone offered to me, I had never done it, which
• 42:00
  Speaker 4: was kind of, uh, it was, I was 27. Most
• 42:03
  Speaker 4: of my friends had, had done that.
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: I would think being gay fashion, New York, uh, It
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: must have been offered to you prior to that, no?
• 42:11
  Speaker 4: I think so, and I just never– Okay. I think
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: I might have tried it in college or something, but
• 42:16
  Speaker 4: it just really overall never did it. Okay. Yeah, never
• 42:20
  Speaker 4: wanted to do it.
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: And so then what happened when you started doing it?
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: I liked it.
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: And what did you like about it?
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: You know, as I'm learning now, there's such a deeper–
• 42:35
  Speaker 4: reason why I was liking it. But at that time,
• 42:38
  Speaker 4: you know, which I think it starts that way. It was,
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: it was just fun. Um, it made everything a little
• 42:42
  Speaker 4: more interesting. It was, I was able to focus more,
• 42:46
  Speaker 4: a higher, bigger sense of confidence, you know, almost to
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: a level where it was an unrealistic level of confidence
• 42:52
  Speaker 4: at some points.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. Um, you know, Bradley Cooper is sober and you,
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: you had a, you mentioned him.
• 43:01
  Speaker 4: Well, I just remember, um, We took him to the
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: CFDA Awards.
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: What does that stand for?
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: Council of Fashion Designers of America. Okay. So that's kind
• 43:10
  Speaker 4: of like the Oscars of fashion.
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 43:13
  Speaker 4: Every fashion house will usually bring some talent with them. Okay.
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: So you take him to the fashion awards and you
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: go to a party after.
• 43:18
  Speaker 4: He told me he was sober. We brought him to
• 43:19
  Speaker 4: the party after and he wanted me to really quickly
• 43:22
  Speaker 4: walk around the party, say hi to everyone, and then
• 43:25
  Speaker 4: he wanted to go. That's what I do now, sober.
• 43:28
  Speaker 4: And I think back to that because it's just like
• 43:31
  Speaker 4: you kind of, you really don't, there's no need for
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: any more time sometimes than that, you know, when you're socializing.
• 43:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 43:37
  Speaker 4: And that's just, that's what I do now. It's like, well,
• 43:40
  Speaker 4: I'll have a dinner or whatever, but then it's like, hi,
• 43:42
  Speaker 4: do the rounds and I'm out of here. And I
• 43:45
  Speaker 4: remembered that. I mean, that was, you know, it took
• 43:48
  Speaker 4: me 15 years later to get there, but it was
• 43:52
  Speaker 4: just something I remember.
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: There was a movie that he did. That I think
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: is so good that I don't think it really got
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: the love that it should have. But for me, I
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: thought it was fabulous. And I don't know if he
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: was a producer on it or what, but it was called,
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: I think it was called Limitless Bradley Cooper.
• 44:07
  Speaker 4: With the fake pill?
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: And it was a fake pill. And it's like, he's this,
• 44:11
  Speaker 2: I could just relate to, he was an aspiring writer and,
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: but like he wasn't bidding, being creative or motivated. And
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: he gets this pill, which it could be like an
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: Adderall or something.
• 44:23
  Speaker 4: Right, I saw it.
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: But all of a sudden he, in the movie, which
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: is fictional, he starts to, he cleans up his place
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: and he sells a book and he gets into, and
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: everything is great and he looks great and he's a
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: better dresser and he has limitless energy, limitless creativity. And
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: then of course, kind of like this other book that
• 44:45
  Speaker 2: I remember from my childhood, I think it was called
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: Flowers for Algernon, but it was about how like they
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: did this testing on this rat and they realized, oh,
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: the pill made the rat so much smarter. And then
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: they check back with the rat and now it starts
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: getting like dumber and he can't go through the maze.
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: And so in the movie, then he realizes it starts
• 45:05
  Speaker 2: having some adverse effect on people like in other ways,
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: like it doesn't work forever. And I wondered if by
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: any chance, if you do and maybe you don't, Like,
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: did he choose that script because he was sober? Because
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: it really is kind of a story of where you
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: think something can be so great at first, whether it's
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: cocaine or, you know, maybe recreational Adderall and you don't
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: really need it or whatever it is because you're like, oh,
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: or maybe you're shy and all of a sudden you
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: drink alcohol and you're more social and so you're making
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: connections and then it has that adverse effect. It's a
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: really good movie.
• 45:39
  Speaker 4: I mean, that's a really good parallel for drugs in general.
• 45:42
  Speaker 4: I saw the movie. You're so good. Did he choose
• 45:45
  Speaker 4: it because he's sober? I don't know.
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: It'd be kind of interesting to see which came first,
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: because you know what I mean? I feel like the
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: script must.
• 45:52
  Speaker 4: Have spoken to him. I've maybe hung out with him
• 45:54
  Speaker 4: one more time since then, so I don't know. But
• 45:56
  Speaker 4: I think probably from what I read and follow, that
• 45:59
  Speaker 4: sobriety plays a role in every choice he makes.
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 46:02
  Speaker 4: His sobriety.
• 46:03
  Speaker 2: Right. And right now he's... supposedly connecting with the mother
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: of his child. There's photos of them. Irinka?
• 46:12
  Speaker 4: Irina.
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: Irinka?
• 46:14
  Speaker 4: Irina.
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: Irina.
• 46:15
  Speaker 4: Irina.
• 46:16
  Speaker 2: You know what? What's her last name?
• 46:18
  Speaker 4: Shake.
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: That's why. Shake has a K in it anyway. People
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: know I'm not good with names. But no, they're out
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: and they're with their daughter.
• 46:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they're putting the kids first.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: That's amazing. Yeah. Whether it's romantic or not, it's really
• 46:31
  Speaker 2: nice just to see that they're- Yeah, my best.
• 46:32
  Speaker 4: Friend does that with her ex-husband. Yeah.
• 46:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 46:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's what you got to do.
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Okay, so you start doing dabbling in some Coke.
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: Socially, weekends, at night, completely not anything that was a
• 46:48
  Speaker 4: habit or anything that was concerning.
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: Were you starting to buy it yourself? I always wonder,
• 46:56
  Speaker 2: when does it come from? Going to a party and
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: someone being like, hey, you want a line?
• 47:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah, a couple years.
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, can I get the number of Joe Schmo?
• 47:03
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because a couple years in, I just wouldn't want
• 47:05
  Speaker 4: to ask anyone, you know? So yeah, probably like a
• 47:08
  Speaker 4: year or two in. Yep. Yes.
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: And does that feel, was that ever a concern that
• 47:13
  Speaker 2: you're like, now I'm buying it?
• 47:15
  Speaker 4: It was not concerned at all.
• 47:16
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 47:17
  Speaker 4: And then toward the end of my time at Calvin Klein,
• 47:20
  Speaker 4: it was still weekends or event nights. Um, it was
• 47:23
  Speaker 4: getting a little heavy. It was a little concerned and,
• 47:26
  Speaker 4: and it was in New York and New York was
• 47:28
  Speaker 4: just getting a lot for me. And I just thought
• 47:29
  Speaker 4: it was, it was a time to get out of
• 47:31
  Speaker 4: New York.
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 47:32
  Speaker 4: And that's when I, when I went to LA. Okay.
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: So you decide, you know, maybe this is getting crazy.
• 47:38
  Speaker 2: Let me go to LA. And then you were saying
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: you got a job as an agent.
• 47:42
  Speaker 4: Right. So it was a smaller agency. And what I
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: really wanted to do was kind of use that as
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: a springboard and kind of go, because I was working
• 47:49
  Speaker 4: with talent, you know, it's a very particular job. I
• 47:51
  Speaker 4: was really good at it. It's a certain person that,
• 47:53
  Speaker 4: that can have that job. You really have to be
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: a certain person to, to, to carry a job with talent,
• 47:59
  Speaker 4: be private, um, make them comfortable. So I was doing,
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: so I, yeah, I took it as smaller agency. And
• 48:05
  Speaker 4: then my goal was to to go to a CAA
• 48:08
  Speaker 4: or a bigger agency like that. I ended up doing
• 48:11
  Speaker 4: it for a year. And what I did is I
• 48:12
  Speaker 4: started having visions of having my own brand, which is
• 48:16
  Speaker 4: what I ultimately left being an agent to do.
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: And that was the gents.
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: I was gents.
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: And then, okay. And then we had all these celebrities.
• 48:25
  Speaker 4: So yeah, I'm starting.
• 48:27
  Speaker 2: That are wearing your gents hat.
• 48:29
  Speaker 4: I'm starting, thanks to Jorge, to practice laws of attraction.
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 48:33
  Speaker 4: Okay. Okay. Um, Abraham Hicks, who's getting me to, I
• 48:37
  Speaker 4: started just envisioning, um, you know, everything I learned at
• 48:41
  Speaker 4: Calvin Klein, but not, you know, I was working for
• 48:43
  Speaker 4: 10 years before Calvin Klein in fashion at PR agencies
• 48:46
  Speaker 4: and David Urim and I worked. Um, so I started
• 48:49
  Speaker 4: having this vision of creating and building my own brand.
• 48:52
  Speaker 4: I knew I wasn't a designer, but I knew I
• 48:54
  Speaker 4: had an aesthetic and it was basically, um, I saw
• 48:57
  Speaker 4: a really big hole in the market. You remember Von
• 48:59
  Speaker 4: Dutch and Ed Hardy? Yes, yeah. So they were huge.
• 49:02
  Speaker 4: They were baseball hats. They went out of business. I
• 49:06
  Speaker 4: had a vision of creating a brand that would launch
• 49:09
  Speaker 4: on luxury baseball caps that was the opposite of aesthetic.
• 49:12
  Speaker 4: It was really simple, beautiful materials. I mean, our bestseller
• 49:17
  Speaker 4: was a plain black hat I called the director's hat
• 49:19
  Speaker 4: that's it that's all it was there yeah um or
• 49:23
  Speaker 4: they had really iconic imagery that was you know just
• 49:26
  Speaker 4: very classic it was it was you know my aesthetic
• 49:29
  Speaker 4: was really in line and trained from Calvin Klein I
• 49:32
  Speaker 4: mean part of why I got that job was it
• 49:34
  Speaker 4: was a fit with me personally in my aesthetic.
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: So, so this starts doing well. And then when do you.
• 49:40
  Speaker 4: It starts doing really well.
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: When does your trouble start happening with yourself?
• 49:44
  Speaker 4: So it really all started happening. I think I always
• 49:47
  Speaker 4: suffer with anxiety, um, which I think probably so many
• 49:50
  Speaker 4: people that are listening to this will relate to. So I, um,
• 49:55
  Speaker 4: I went to a doctor, um, but it was just
• 49:58
  Speaker 4: kind of like, that's okay. Like kind of, kind of
• 50:00
  Speaker 4: like a pharmacologist. Okay. Friend recommended the doctor. Um, I
• 50:05
  Speaker 4: went in, it was a waiting room. There was like
• 50:06
  Speaker 4: 20 people waiting. Um, he saw me sat down. What's
• 50:10
  Speaker 4: going on? Oh, I'm a little anxious. I mean, I
• 50:14
  Speaker 4: couldn't have been more of a one or two sentence conversation.
• 50:17
  Speaker 4: He prescribed me 90 Klonopin to 92 milligram Klonopin. So
• 50:22
  Speaker 4: three a day. Okay. I don't even, that sounds like
• 50:25
  Speaker 4: a lot. I don't even, okay. Um, and I think
• 50:28
  Speaker 4: it was 90 Adderall, maybe like 20 milligram pills. Um, Uh,
• 50:33
  Speaker 4: Klonopin is a benzodiazepine. So it's in a class of
• 50:35
  Speaker 4: drugs with, with, with Ativan, um, Xanax. Um, I didn't
• 50:42
  Speaker 4: know what a benzodiazepine was. I don't, I think I,
• 50:44
  Speaker 4: like I said, maybe I've taken Xanax casually, socially.
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 50:48
  Speaker 4: Um, but I started taking them, um, as prescribed. It
• 50:53
  Speaker 4: was very helpful at first. Um, what I wasn't doing
• 50:57
  Speaker 4: and where I look back now is I don't think
• 50:59
  Speaker 4: if I was, wasn't an addict that would have maybe
• 51:01
  Speaker 4: done proper research or wouldn't have gotten maybe so dependent
• 51:07
  Speaker 4: upon the drug. But that's kind of when everything started was, was,
• 51:11
  Speaker 4: was that, that visit to the doctor. Um, but it took,
• 51:14
  Speaker 4: it took about two years. Um, I would take the
• 51:17
  Speaker 4: Adderall was really helping me work. I have really bad ADHD,
• 51:19
  Speaker 4: so it really helped with focus. Um, I think it
• 51:24
  Speaker 4: got problematic pretty fast. And I think people around me
• 51:27
  Speaker 4: were noticing the company was really, really moving fast. It
• 51:29
  Speaker 4: was really exploding. We'd gotten really big funding from JP Reps.
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: So now you had, wait, so you had the Klonopin,
• 51:37
  Speaker 2: which is going to help you with anxiety. But then
• 51:39
  Speaker 2: you have Adderall that's going to, I would think, make
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: you anxious.
• 51:43
  Speaker 4: It's just the perfect combination. You just never come down.
• 51:45
  Speaker 4: It was like up all day, Klonopin to go back
• 51:49
  Speaker 4: to bed, Adderall to get up.
• 51:52
  Speaker 5: Wow. Right.
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: And then did you have to ever up your dose?
• 51:56
  Speaker 2: So then do you have to up your dose?
• 51:57
  Speaker 4: I never upped the dose, but he only had to
• 52:01
  Speaker 4: see me like every few months. He was just automatic refills.
• 52:04
  Speaker 4: But then I was noticing I needed more of the Klonopin,
• 52:07
  Speaker 4: not even to feel relaxed, just to feel normal, just
• 52:10
  Speaker 4: to be back to myself before. So I think, and
• 52:14
  Speaker 4: then if I was.
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: And then what about weight? Did you lose weight? Because
• 52:18
  Speaker 2: you're never like hungry if you're doing all this.
• 52:20
  Speaker 4: I wasn't eating a lot. People were- Definitely concerned. Yeah,
• 52:24
  Speaker 4: I was emaciated.
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow.
• 52:26
  Speaker 4: You can see it in pictures. It's all over.
• 52:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah. So then what happened? So you're still doing your business.
• 52:33
  Speaker 4: So it all hit to a head. I went to
• 52:35
  Speaker 4: New York for Jen's. I left my backpack with the
• 52:39
  Speaker 4: Klonopin in it in the lobby of a friend's building
• 52:42
  Speaker 4: to go get something to eat. I think it's on camera.
• 52:47
  Speaker 4: So the guy watching the bags had his friends come
• 52:49
  Speaker 4: and steal it. So the Klonopin gets stolen. No big deal.
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: The doctor never– I really didn't know that it was
• 52:56
  Speaker 4: a big deal I was even taking them to be honest.
• 52:58
  Speaker 4: They get stolen. I slowly just get deathly, deathly ill.
• 53:04
  Speaker 4: Every day worse. Like an enormous, enormous amount.
• 53:08
  Speaker 2: Of– Because you didn't have it. So you were withdrawing.
• 53:11
  Speaker 4: I was withdrawing. You can't stop benzodiazepines like that. Oh, okay.
• 53:16
  Speaker 4: I stopped them cold turkey. And by that point, I
• 53:18
  Speaker 4: don't know if I was between taking them as prescribed
• 53:21
  Speaker 4: and then if I would party or something, abusing them more. Yeah.
• 53:25
  Speaker 2: Party meaning like drinking?
• 53:26
  Speaker 4: No, if I go, yeah, if I did coke or
• 53:28
  Speaker 4: something to calm down. So I could have been taking
• 53:30
  Speaker 4: toward the end, maybe five or 10 a day.
• 53:33
  Speaker 2: Oh my God.
• 53:34
  Speaker 4: Right. Stopped the cold turkey, was in New York. It
• 53:37
  Speaker 4: takes three days to leave your system. So I was
• 53:39
  Speaker 4: good for three days. I got through New York, came
• 53:41
  Speaker 4: back to LA, couldn't move on the couch, freaking out.
• 53:45
  Speaker 4: Everything was scary. The mailman was approaching. I was freaking out. My,
• 53:50
  Speaker 4: my boyfriend was there. He didn't know what to do.
• 53:52
  Speaker 4: That turned into really, really, really getting really sick, blacking
• 53:56
  Speaker 4: out for long periods, which was now I know I
• 53:59
  Speaker 4: was having seizures. Um, I got myself up to a doctor, to,
• 54:04
  Speaker 4: to my regular doctor. She fell back in the, when
• 54:08
  Speaker 4: she saw me, cause I was so emaciated and my
• 54:10
  Speaker 4: whole face was breaking out. So I was, I would,
• 54:14
  Speaker 4: I wasn't ever a big drinker, but during this time
• 54:17
  Speaker 4: when I was feeling so sick, I'd be like, let
• 54:19
  Speaker 4: me have a glass of wine. It would hit the
• 54:20
  Speaker 4: same receptors that would be for the Klonopin. So I
• 54:25
  Speaker 4: would feel better. My body was thinking, oh, I got
• 54:28
  Speaker 4: the benzodiazepine back. One to two hours, 50 times worse.
• 54:32
  Speaker 4: I was just making it worse. So I was broken
• 54:35
  Speaker 4: out from drinking. And this isn't drinking just to have
• 54:39
  Speaker 4: fun or whatever. I would drink because I was suffering
• 54:41
  Speaker 4: so bad from the side effects that it would help
• 54:44
  Speaker 4: relieve the symptoms. But I was just making it worse.
• 54:47
  Speaker 4: Went to the doctor. She said, I don't know what's
• 54:50
  Speaker 4: wrong with you. I'm really, really concerned. I said, while
• 54:54
  Speaker 4: I'm here, can you refill me with Klonopin? She said,
• 54:57
  Speaker 4: who's giving you Klonopin? I said, some doctor on Wilshire. Okay.
• 55:02
  Speaker 4: She left the office. She comes back in with the nurse. Honey,
• 55:08
  Speaker 4: That's how she talks. You're having benzo withdrawal syndrome. You're
• 55:13
  Speaker 4: going to be very sick. You have to go to
• 55:15
  Speaker 4: a rehab. This is what I said to her. I
• 55:17
  Speaker 4: remember perfectly. A rehab. I don't have, I've never have
• 55:22
  Speaker 4: or have any problem with drinking or drugs. And I,
• 55:24
  Speaker 4: and I really didn't. Okay. Yet I was getting addicted
• 55:29
  Speaker 4: to this medicine was prescribed. This was my fault. I
• 55:32
  Speaker 4: was taking more, but it wasn't a concern. But she said,
• 55:35
  Speaker 4: they're the only ones that are going to be able
• 55:36
  Speaker 4: to treat you. You can't go to a doctor. So
• 55:41
  Speaker 4: the next day, my boyfriend at the time, he took
• 55:44
  Speaker 4: me to some place in Tarzana. Is that a city
• 55:46
  Speaker 4: around here? Yes. That's right near here, yeah. I mean,
• 55:49
  Speaker 4: people were walking into walls. They didn't ask me what
• 55:52
  Speaker 4: I was on. They were like, you'll have a bed.
• 55:54
  Speaker 4: You'll take these medications every day.
• 55:56
  Speaker 2: Now, when you go in there, what is the payment?
• 55:59
  Speaker 2: Is this free?
• 56:00
  Speaker 4: Is this your insurance?
• 56:00
  Speaker 5: I was.
• 56:02
  Speaker 4: So I wasn't able to even, my head was such
• 56:06
  Speaker 4: a mush because the benzodiazepine, when you're withdrawing from that,
• 56:09
  Speaker 4: you're losing your mind basically. This is a deeper and
• 56:12
  Speaker 4: separate conversation. But I wasn't even able to compute that.
• 56:17
  Speaker 4: I guess he took me to a place that took
• 56:18
  Speaker 4: my insurance.
• 56:19
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 56:19
  Speaker 4: It was, I literally sat there. I said, do you
• 56:22
  Speaker 4: want to even know what, they didn't care what I
• 56:25
  Speaker 4: was on. Okay. Someone, while I was there, a bell rang.
• 56:30
  Speaker 4: I don't know what it even meant. Someone walked directly
• 56:32
  Speaker 4: into the... It was like one flew out of the
• 56:33
  Speaker 4: cuckoo's nest. I ran out, told my boyfriend at the time,
• 56:36
  Speaker 4: I said, get me out of here.
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: So you didn't even stay a day?
• 56:39
  Speaker 4: No, no. I didn't stay an hour. Okay. I was like,
• 56:41
  Speaker 4: I'm not staying here. Okay. Are you kidding? He took
• 56:43
  Speaker 4: me to another place. It was called The Hills. Okay.
• 56:45
  Speaker 4: It was in West Hollywood.
• 56:46
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 56:47
  Speaker 4: It was Rock Hudson's old house.
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 56:49
  Speaker 4: I was like, I can stay here. So they were like,
• 56:51
  Speaker 4: it's $ 80, 000 for the month. We talked about what I
• 56:54
  Speaker 4: was doing.
• 56:55
  Speaker 2: Did your insurance cover any of the.
• 56:57
  Speaker 4: No, no, no, no.
• 56:58
  Speaker 3: Um....
• 57:00
  Speaker 4: This is where they get shady because they'll tell you,
• 57:03
  Speaker 4: we'll bill your insurance and it's additional 80. Now you
• 57:06
  Speaker 4: don't know if your insurance is paying them 30,000 or 10,000.
• 57:11
  Speaker 4: That's a shady business in itself. And that's kind of
• 57:13
  Speaker 4: my business. What I do now is kind of protect
• 57:16
  Speaker 4: people from that.
• 57:17
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 57:17
  Speaker 4: So to sum up the long story, they said it
• 57:18
  Speaker 4: was $ 80, 000 for the month. I said I could put 20,000
• 57:20
  Speaker 4: on my Amex. They said that we'll take you for
• 57:29
  Speaker 4: a week. We'll start detoxing you, but you need like
• 57:32
  Speaker 4: three solid months. I couldn't even compute it. And that's
• 57:36
  Speaker 4: all I had. So the minute I left there after
• 57:38
  Speaker 4: that week, I just got worse and worse and worse,
• 57:41
  Speaker 4: but I never took another benzodiazepine. I didn't, I didn't,
• 57:44
  Speaker 4: when they told me that's what was making me sick.
• 57:46
  Speaker 4: I didn't, I didn't.
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: Did you take anything else?
• 57:49
  Speaker 4: I would, I would drink alcohol to relieve the symptoms.
• 57:56
  Speaker 4: But when I started realizing that alcohol was making worse,
• 57:58
  Speaker 4: or they told me, I stopped with the alcohol too.
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: And then is that how, so you kind of cured yourself?
• 58:04
  Speaker 4: No, I was sick for like two years.
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: Sick, when you say sick, just like physically sick from,
• 58:10
  Speaker 2: because this was still in your system or I'm confused.
• 58:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, it's a confusing topic. I don't think anyone
• 58:16
  Speaker 4: around me really does still understand and they don't really
• 58:18
  Speaker 4: need to. But basically- Let me stop for one second
• 58:25
  Speaker 4: so I can get my thoughts on this.
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:26
  Speaker 4: Because then this is confusing, I know. I guess... So
• 58:32
  Speaker 4: the way... Yeah, I stopped so cold turkey and not
• 58:36
  Speaker 4: weaning off that I put my body into basically what
• 58:40
  Speaker 4: they call a benzo withdrawal syndrome. You can even look
• 58:42
  Speaker 4: it up.
• 58:43
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 58:44
  Speaker 4: It says all the symptoms there or whatever, but it
• 58:46
  Speaker 4: lasted for basically two years. But in that time, I
• 58:49
  Speaker 4: would drink from... I would drink.
• 58:54
  Speaker 4: I'm trying to think of, because I know I didn't
• 58:56
  Speaker 4: drink the whole time in the rehab, but then I
• 58:59
  Speaker 4: would drink. Sometimes it would be so intense in the
• 59:01
  Speaker 4: middle of the night, I would honestly take vodka and
• 59:03
  Speaker 4: drink it, and then it would just be 50 times worse.
• 59:05
  Speaker 4: So I was making it worse, so it didn't need
• 59:07
  Speaker 4: to last that long, but I had really no one
• 59:10
  Speaker 4: advising me.
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: Um, and were you able to still work during this time?
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: Are you being creative? Are you working?
• 59:19
  Speaker 4: So I, I w I was, it was really, really difficult.
• 59:22
  Speaker 4: I had a partner, a lot fell on him way
• 59:24
  Speaker 4: too much. I had some, another woman running the business. Um,
• 59:30
  Speaker 4: But yeah, I was, no, I wasn't able to go
• 59:33
  Speaker 4: to work a lot of days.
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah. So, but you're able to keep your boyfriend? I
• 59:40
  Speaker 2: think that'd be very hard. It's very hard for anybody
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: whose partner's going through this.
• 59:45
  Speaker 4: So basically when I went for the 10 days, I left,
• 59:48
  Speaker 4: I was sick like really bad, like they said, for
• 59:50
  Speaker 4: four months.
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: And you left after the 10 days because that's all
• 59:53
  Speaker 2: you could afford?
• 59:54
  Speaker 4: That's all I could afford. And I wish they would
• 59:56
  Speaker 4: have explained to me more. But, you know, I was
• 59:58
  Speaker 4: in such a, my brain was such mush. I couldn't
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 4: comprehend it. Four months later, I called them. They said,
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 4: we'll take you back for free.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 4: This was a place called The Hills. It was in
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 4: West Hollywood.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: Do you recommend it?
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 4: It's closed down now. Okay. Yeah, it was great. It
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 4: was really great.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 2: Why did it close down then?
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 4: You know, I don't know. I don't know. I just
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 4: heard it closed down.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 4: I don't know why. I'm trying to think of the
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 4: last guy. He's a guy named Howard. He's really, really
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 4: big in the rehab and recovery space. I can't think
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 4: of his last name though. They took me back for free.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 4: I did a month there. They got me really, really
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 4: straightened out. They had to put me on another medication
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 4: to get my body back and to be able to
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 4: handle kind of the detox from the benzos. They had
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 4: to take me off that. That was another nightmare. I mean,
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 4: it was just, it was just, it was, it was
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 4: a mess, but I got out of there. I stayed
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 4: sober for two months and then I just went fully
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 4: back to my normal life of drinking socially, maybe using
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 4: cocaine socially.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: So do you do that now?
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 4: No, no, I'm completely sober.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: So then what happened then? And when did you like
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 2: decide I can't have anything? Because there is like, oh,
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 2: I've talked about this like with Dr. Drew and stuff.
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: There is like that feeling of like, you know, just
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 2: because you are addicted to cocaine or pills or whatever,
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 2: then you go completely sober. But then a couple of
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 2: years later, people are feeling, oh, I can be California sober.
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 2: I can have a joint here or there. I can
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: have a glass of wine here or there because I
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 2: never had a problem with marijuana or alcohol. And I
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 2: do think maybe, you know, that it can be different
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: for other people because if it was like a pain
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 2: addiction– like a pain pill addiction, and then you get
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 2: over that, you know, a couple years later, why couldn't
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: you have a glass of wine?
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 4: I don't know that maybe I can have a glass
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 4: of wine. Maybe I could. I just, I'm at a
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 4: place where.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: No, for you, I understand, but I'm saying like, I think,
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 2: because we've, you know, like with the whole AA thing,
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 2: you know, which started whatever it was in the 30s
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 2: or the 40s, Of like, you know, you have to,
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 2: you know, you can never have another sip of alcohol again, whatever,
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 2: even if that wasn't your issue, even though it's called alcohol.
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 4: 100%.
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 2: And now people are kind of like, well, and, you know,
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 2: and we discussed before the show that you have some
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 2: thoughts about it and that maybe it really, the principles
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 2: don't totally apply to today for everyone. And so let's
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 2: talk a little bit about that.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 4: So I... Yeah, for me, basically, it's just where it went.
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 4: It just escalated for me. The cocaine just then did
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 4: become a problem. And it went... I'm trying to think of...
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 4: It went to... It never was the benzos again. It
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 4: was the cocaine and....
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 5: So wait.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 4: I'm like.
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 2: This is where I'm confused.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 4: It's a story. And I'm trying... You got to remember,
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 4: I'm trying to think back too.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 2: Okay, but like.
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So you go.
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 2: You get off the pills, you go, then you, you know,
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: but you're still drinking and you're still doing cocaine for occasion.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: Then you go back to the West Hollywood place, the Hills.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 2: They take you for a month for free. And then
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 2: after that, are you still drinking and stuff or no,
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 2: then you're completely done.
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 4: No, I was, I, I, I did, I did no
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 4: drinking or whatever for two months and I felt completely
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 4: better finally from the whole Benzo withdrawal. And I was
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 4: just back to myself and I was just doing kind
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 4: of what I, what I always did.
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 2: Okay, so what I'm understanding is your story is very common.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 4: Very common.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: In and out of different rehabs. The doctor thought he
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 2: was giving you a prescription.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 4: It got me started, but fully as an addict, I
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 4: got addicted. And when I got better from the Benzel
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 4: withdrawal syndrome, it just took another form and continued until
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 4: I realized that everything had to stop for me. Right.
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 2: And so when you see other, you know, celebrities, especially
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: like in Hollywood and, you know, people are like, what
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 2: is the deal? Like, for example, let's just talk about.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 4: Well, I just want to preface this by saying in
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 4: my experience with the talent I've worked with.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 4: Almost most of them are not using drugs. I mean,
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 4: to operate at the level and be on that much
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 4: of your A game, you really can't. Right. And that's
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 4: why so many of them are sober.
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 2: Yes. I mean, I. I can see why they do
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 2: turn sober, but I can see why sometimes they do
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 2: get in a habit of it. Because even when I,
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: back in the day when I was working on this
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 2: TV show, and then I would go to the East
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 2: Coast and do like five shows in a weekend, and
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 2: I went to a doctor, just a normal checkup. And
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: he's like, is there anything else? And he was an
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 2: older doctor. And I said, well, I think I could
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: probably use Ambien or something, because that way when I land...
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 2: you know, in the East coast. And I know I
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 2: need to get this many hours of sleep. Or if
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: I finish performing, I could take that ambient, like, you know,
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: right when I get into the hotel room and get my,
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 2: you know, seven, eight hours before I have to go
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 2: back to the West coast, whatever I was. And right away,
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 2: he was like, no, no, I'm not doing that. This is,
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 2: you know, drink hot tea, whatever, don't watch TV, read
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 2: a book, all those things. And I, so I've never
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 2: had a prescription to Ambien. I've never done that, but
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 2: I can see how almost like Elvis Presley, whatever, how
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 2: the people around you might feed that up and down-ness
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 2: so that you can go on the road, still make
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 2: it down. Or like even a Michael Jackson. I mean,
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: the whole thing of where you got to the place
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 2: of someone having to give him that strong of a
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 2: drug just so he could sleep.
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 4: You know? A hundred percent. You know, I've been there
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 4: and I've seen it.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 2: So, like, I want to talk about your company and everything. And, like,
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 2: explain why... why you think this works breakthrough?
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 4: Well, I just, for, for me, I really had to
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 4: kind of guide myself. I mean, I had my, my
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 4: family was amazing helping support me and be by my side,
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 4: but my, my situation, I think everyone's is that's going
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 4: through some type of addiction is really individualized and, um,
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 4: and having really the right people around you. So let's
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 4: just look, let's look at it this way. You have
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 4: a drug problem. Maybe you think you do. You're not sure.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 4: I don't think it's just something that comes to you.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 4: I'm an, I'm an addict and, You maybe need to
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 4: come to that realization. Okay. So what are your choices?
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 4: You can go to rehab. Okay. That's a huge statement
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 4: to your family, to your, to your job. Is that,
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 4: is that the right move for you? So I think
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 4: minimum with insurance covering at rehab is going to be
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 4: that's 30 K. In addition, it can either be with
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 4: insurance plus out of pocket, but you're going to go
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 4: to a really shitty place. Now, A middle of the
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 4: road or nicer place, we're talking 80 to 150K a month.
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 4: What is a rehab going to do for you? Okay?
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 4: What does it do? I'm going to tell you what
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 4: it does. It's going to separate you from the substance.
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 4: If you can't stop reaching for the benzo or you
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 4: can't stop going to the heroin dealer or the bottle
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 4: or whatever it is, then rehab may be the place
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 4: for you. Separate you from the substance for 30 days.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 4: Then you're out and you're on your own. How are
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 4: you going to live after that? I've been three times.
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 4: I got maybe one, two or tops three tips on
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 4: how to survive as an addict sober.
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 2: So I'm with rehab and I've never been. I have
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 2: had a sibling that went and I used to go
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 2: on a Wednesday night when I was 13 and like
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 2: visit and hear what I called the juicy stories.
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 2: So I got to hear the juicy stories.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 4: What does that mean, the juicy story?
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 2: Like I got to sit there at 13 and hear. No,
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 2: like I would go on a Wednesday night and I
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 2: was 13 and it was for my brother and we'd
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 2: go into Beverly Hills and then the people with their
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 2: loved ones would be there, the people recovering, and then
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 2: they would tell their story. And it was always really
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 2: juicy for me to hear.
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 2: So I was like, oh, I get to hear these
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 2: juicy stories. We go to dinner. But it was also
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 2: really kind of good for me. I think that's one
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 2: of the reasons I never wanted to experiment with drugs
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: or anything because I saw what it did to people.
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 2: I saw this beautiful girl tell her story of how
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 2: like she basically, you know, had to prostitute herself. And
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 2: she was so pretty and she had all this promise,
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 2: but she got addicted. And I remember my mom being like, oh,
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 2: my God, that girl had a face of an angel.
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 2: And like, what a sad story. story because of this.
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 2: So like, I always like understood it. I was always
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 2: interested in it. I loved the show intervention, but I am,
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 2: you know, you see the statistics of you know the
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 2: average person goes back whatever nine different.
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 4: Times so every time I was there I mean almost
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 4: everybody was in there five ten more times and it
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 4: was really really mostly people for opiate addictions I rarely
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 4: saw alcohol Never, I mean, never cocaine or anything else.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 4: Opiates or heroin. Basically, because I asked, I was like,
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 4: when did you think shooting up with heroin was a
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 4: good idea? It was always no. Got the opiates from,
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 4: and I've never taken opiates other than having it prescribed
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 4: as a surgery. So got the opiates from the doctor,
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 4: got addicted to the opiates, moved on to heroin.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 2: Because it was cheaper and they couldn't get more.
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 4: Cheaper and accessible. Yeah.
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 2: Got it. Yeah, which is, you know, such a sign
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 2: of our times for like, right, the last 30, 20 years.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy what's going on with opiates.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: And so, you know, when I hear what you're saying too,
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 2: I mean, now this is just me logically thinking and people,
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 2: I have not been to rehab and, you know, so
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: I'm just saying. But I almost feel like, you know,
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 2: if this is your situation with a loved one and
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 2: the odds are they're going to have to go back
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 2: four times, which now we're looking at a quarter of
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 2: a million dollars or whatever. What is the solution? And
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 2: could the solution possibly be, I know I'm just thinking, okay,
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 2: just like you would pay for a private school or
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 2: you could have a home tutor, like teach your kid
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 2: homeschool at your house. Like, what about it? Just what
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 2: about a sober companion? What about someone just literally moving
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 2: into your house, making sure you're busy all the time,
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 2: making sure you don't have any drugs or with you,
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 2: Wouldn't that almost be less expensive than going over to
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 2: this place?
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 4: It would be much less expensive and something I recommend
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 4: all the time. And I've done it. Oh, okay. I've
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 4: had somebody come stay at my house and me when
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 4: family was encouraging more to me to stay in a rehab.
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 4: You know, as I was learning, it's really hard because
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 4: you lose your voice when you're the addict.
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 2: Got it.
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 4: You lose your voice. No one's listening to you. So
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 4: when I was in there and all the three programs
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 4: I went to were 12-step programs, AA. When I would
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 4: go to AA meetings or whatever, and if I would
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 4: question anything- or it didn't seem like it was helping
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 4: me or working for me, it would fall back on
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 4: me or if anyone would even listen. It's like the
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 4: addicts talking. You don't know what you're talking about. Right. Right.
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 2: And then they're just desperate and they're being told by
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 2: these people, like, do you want your son to live
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 2: or die?
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah.
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 2: And the only other choice is write this check and go.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 4: Into this place. Write this check and this is what
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 4: we're going to teach them and they're going to come
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 4: here and they're going to learn all this stuff and
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 4: do all these things. that never, ever happen.
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 2: Like what things?
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 4: Oh, I mean, I had a list of therapies and
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 4: doing things with your brain and family days, a complete
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 4: list of just the things that never happen.
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 2: And why didn't they happen?
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 2: You mean, so you're there and then all these beautiful
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 2: things that, you mean like the program says you're going
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 2: to do all this, but then you're there and you're
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 2: just squatting in your room or what?
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 4: No, no, no, no. It's like a bootcamp. You're like
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 4: a child. Everything's taken away from you. Laptop. phone vapes
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 4: I guess at some places no there's like things you
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 4: go to like groups they call them every day a
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 4: lot of it was AA based so reading out of
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 4: the AA book playing games there was like sometimes a
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 4: meditation but you have to think of what you're going
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 4: through when you're coming on when you're that addicted to
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 4: a substance and coming off of every day is just
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 4: like building your brain back up to be able to function,
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 4: which takes a few weeks, you know, just to get
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 4: the system, the substances out of your system. So it's like,
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 4: that's why I said, it's really there to separate you
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 4: from the substance.
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 2: So I do want to talk to you a little
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 2: bit about like, why do you think there's some good
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 2: things about AA, but there's some things that you mentioned
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: you don't necessarily agree with in today's world and how
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 2: it could be improved upon?
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 4: So I went to AA, um, In the programs I
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 4: went to, they were 12-step based. And then I went
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 4: to AA meetings, I'd say for about two years. I
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 4: went every day. It's really like, you know, it's kind
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 4: of like listen to what you're told. And I was listening.
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 4: I am so happy that that program is helping so
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 4: many people. And I think you have to, if you
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 4: think that program is helping you, then you should keep
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 4: going to your meetings and I think there's a lot
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 4: of good messages that I found from it, like helping others,
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 4: taking one day at a time, being sober for today. Prayer.
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 4: I mean, then there's a few things that contradict what
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 4: I'm learning about addiction. Like saying you're powerless. I mean,
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 4: I find myself powerless to the substance, but not powerless
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 4: as a human being.
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 2: So it's kind of like the anti-manifesting or like a
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 2: little bit negative thing.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it definitely defies the laws of attraction in terms of,
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 4: you know, speaking like, my name is Josh. And every
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 4: sentence you speak, and I'm an addict. My name is Josh,
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 4: and I'm an alcoholic. Yeah. Every time you speak.
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I think that, yeah, you're right. Why
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 2: is that?
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 4: And then you speak and you share.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 4: Which I never had a problem with. keeping things in
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 4: so i so for me but when you're sharing you
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 4: can't be responded to so you speak right and you're
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 4: not being you can't be responded to.
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 2: You mean you do your speech and then at the
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 2: end everyone just claps and has a cup of coffee
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 2: or whatever.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 4: But right but it can come up to you at
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 4: the end right you know and and and say i
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 4: heard that or but you're not gonna if you're like
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 4: you know i'm struggling with heroin and now i need
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 4: like benzos to come down with um i don't know
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 4: what i should do right someone can call up to
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 4: you i guess at the at the end of the
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 4: class whatever no one's gonna say i'm just be like you.
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 2: Know okay i have a question and i don't mean
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 2: to make light of it but i do okay so
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 2: i mean when i was in la trying to do
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 2: stand-up it's very hard to get any you know spots
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 2: And I remember this girl being like, oh, I go
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 2: to this AA meeting on Robertson. And that's where all
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 2: the agents and everybody is. And I did not do this.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 2: But I did think, I wonder if I could come
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 2: up with like an AA story but be really funny
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 2: and mention I'm a stand-up. And, you know, create a
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 2: funny story because I'm so desperate to get an agent.
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 2: And this is back when it was really hard to
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 2: get an agent. You couldn't just go on TikTok and,
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 2: you know, get a million views for like doing an impression.
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 2: And do you think, and then I remember, okay, also
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 2: for Housewives people, Luann Dilliseps, she got arrested one night
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 2: for trying, thought it was her hotel room and it
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 2: was someone else's hotel room. Whenever she got arrested, she
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 2: was really drunk. And part of her, you know, getting
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 2: out of this situation was to go to AA and everything.
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 2: And in one of the episodes, she brings Sonya in
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 2: Miami to her AA meeting. And Sonya's like, I didn't
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 2: like it. It was depressing. Sonya probably, you know, drinks
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 2: a lot too.
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 4: She's like, it was depressing.
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 2: I don't like it. She goes, but you know, there
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 2: Luann has her routine. She's doing her shtick. And I
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 2: was like, oh my God. Cause then I saw Luann's
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 2: show and she has these like funny bits in between
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 2: her songs that, And I do think she kind of
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 2: practiced her bit there. I mean, you're doing the same story.
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 2: So my question is, did you ever go to these
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 2: meetings and be like, Oh, this guy again? Like I
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 2: heard the story about his ex wife and, and when,
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 2: you know, he drove the car into the snowmobile or whatever.
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 4: Yes. It's, it's welcome for everybody. I mean, do you.
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 2: Ever bow out? Like if you were at the comedy
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 2: store and you like are ready for the meeting and
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 2: you're like, I just need some new material. Like, I've
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 2: heard these three people's like stories.
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 4: Yes, especially when you were- Because your story doesn't change.
• 1:17:17
  Speaker 2: Your story is your story, right? So you can't get your,
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 2: how long can your speech be when you get signed
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 2: up to do it?
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 4: I think they ask for, you can't speak for over
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 4: two or three minutes.
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 2: Oh, it has to be that short.
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a lot of, oh no, there's
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 4: a lot of rules. Like a Tuesday night at the lab.
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 4: There's a lot of rules. And then you, you know,
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 4: there's counting days. So it's like, which is such an accomplishment.
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 4: I've been sober for this many days.
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 4: You know, and then the next day I'd see someone.
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 4: I was sober 47 years. I had a drink last night.
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 4: I'm in the shame. Now I'm at day one. Even
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 4: though they were 47 years sober, they're back at day one.
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 2: Okay, you know what? I was telling my son about
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 2: this the other day. Because they were like, oh, should
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 2: we go out and play another round? It was really hot.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 2: And I go, have you heard the expression, let's not
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 2: and say we did? Like, so if someone had that,
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 2: why did they have to do that?
• 1:18:05
  Speaker 4: Why did they have to do what?
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 2: Why do they have to go to the meeting and say,
• 1:18:09
  Speaker 2: I just lost 47 years? Like, why can't they go, fuck,
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 2: I had a drink. I'm not going to count it.
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 2: I'm just going to act like I'm still sober for 47.
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 2: Like why, or why, why do they have to say like,
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 2: You know, when people say that, it's the same thing
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 2: with breastfeeding. Like, when people want to stop breastfeeding, they're like, oh,
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 2: I have to call the Lecce League and tell them
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 2: I've stopped breastfeeding.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 4: Why? Like, why do you have to do this? The
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 4: last two years in my sobriety, I made it, you
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 4: can call it a relapse or whatever you want to
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 4: define it. I made a conscious decision where I was like,
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 4: I think I'm happier using drugs. And I took three
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 4: months off.
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 2: Of being sober?
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 4: From being sober.
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 2: And what'd you start using?
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 4: Used drugs.
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 2: What drugs did you use?
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 4: It was just, it was really cocaine, not even alcohol.
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 4: Turned into a complete disaster.
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 4: And then I was like, I can't do anything anymore.
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 4: But if, if I didn't have that time, I would
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 4: have never came to that point. For, for me, the key,
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 4: and I think for a lot of people is when
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 4: you stop wanting the substance and So whatever you resist
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 4: is going to– let's see.
• 1:19:10
  Speaker 5: Hold on.
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 4: Whatever you resist persists?
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 4: Whatever you resist persists. If you're wanting something, you're eventually
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 4: going to give in to it. And if you don't,
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 4: you may just need to go to multiple meetings a day. Right.
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 4: And that's okay. Right. That's fine if that's what you need.
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 4: For me, I asked my friend who's in AA, and
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 4: I have a lot of really good friends in AA.
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 4: I said to him– do you miss drinking and drugs?
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 4: And he texted back every day. And I thought, God,
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 4: that must be so hard.
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 2: Because you don't miss, you can say I don't miss it.
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 4: Sometimes, but it's, this stretch, and I've done different stretches
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 4: of sobriety, it's the least that I, I don't want
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 4: the substance anymore.
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 2: Do you feel like for some people with the AA,
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 2: that there's shame in not going to the AA meetings anymore,
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 2: even if you're staying sober?
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 4: So my, I have a great, you know, front guy
• 1:20:05
  Speaker 4: at season eight, he's like 40 years sober, 30, 30,
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 4: he's like 67. I love him. We definitely disagree on topics.
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 4: He tells me AA is all I know. He feels
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 4: so grateful at a program and I'm grateful for him
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 4: to have it. He has a sponsee. The sponsee had
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 4: a relapse after two.
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 2: That means he's a sponsoring someone.
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 4: He's sponsoring somebody. Okay. Okay. So that's kind of how
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 4: the program works. The sponsor had a relapse. The sponsor
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 4: told him you weren't going to enough meetings. That's why
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 4: it happens. Okay.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 4: Does that work or not? It depends if somebody who
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 4: believes in AA or not is the difference of opinion.
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 2: So what is your– tell me about Breakthrough Recovery and
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 2: Wellness and what your philosophy is in recovery.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 4: Okay. So I don't call myself a sobriety expert because
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 4: every day I'm learning how to be sober and I
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 4: think that will be for the rest of my life
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 4: wherever I'm at. What I am is a recovery expert.
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 4: So I work a lot about do you need to
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 4: go to rehab? Do you need to detox? Can you
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 4: detox at home or do you need to go to
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 4: a detox? If you do go to a treatment center,
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 4: which one will it be? But do you definitely need
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 4: a treatment center? What will you learn there? I'll hold
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 4: your hand through the whole process of that. Then I
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 4: have a team, whether if you decide, do you want
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 4: to detox at home or do you want to go somewhere?
• 1:21:30
  Speaker 4: I can recommend different places. Um, and then I also
• 1:21:34
  Speaker 4: do where I, where I talk.
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 2: So it's almost like you're like a concierge consultant kind
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 2: of a thing where they can go to you and
• 1:21:41
  Speaker 2: you can help them figure out the best plan for them.
• 1:21:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah. And then they can, they can work with, for me,
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 4: with me every week to, to continue to go through,
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 4: through their journey. And I do that with a lot
• 1:21:51
  Speaker 4: of people. Um, But like I said, I want to
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 4: go back to like if you're struggling and you're looking
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 4: at your choices, like to go to rehab is going
• 1:22:02
  Speaker 4: to be– you just don't want to go somewhere that
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 4: your insurance covers or is– unless it's all you've got
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 4: and you separate from the substance. But to go anywhere
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 4: decent is you're looking at like $ 80, 000 to $ 150, 000 a month.
• 1:22:18
  Speaker 4: Or then you have AA and you can go to AA.
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 4: There's meetings available to you every day. Everybody's welcome. And
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 4: they made me feel really welcome. But what happens if
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 4: you don't feel that it's helping you? Then what do
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 4: you do? There's not really anything left to do. You
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 4: got to do it yourself. That's kind of where I
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 4: come in.
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 2: And then, okay, got it. And then you recommend.
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 4: We evaluate, recommend, yeah.
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 2: Create a plan.
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 4: Counselors, everything.
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 2: I think that's really important because I just think, you know,
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 2: not everything works for everybody. And, and the world since
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 2: AA was created, it really was for alcoholics and it
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 2: really was created at a certain time. And I definitely
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 2: think there's great things about it, but, you know, you know,
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 2: because of the opioid addiction and what has happened and, um,
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 2: it's just a different world. And it's like, you know,
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 2: I mean, the, the amount of times that people, you know,
• 1:23:15
  Speaker 2: die and it was never intended. It was really like
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 2: something was in a pill and they thought they were
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 2: just going to have a fun night. And it's like, well,
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 2: now it's like, Oh, well they were addicted. No, there's that,
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 2: that they weren't addicted.
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 4: And then you have to, now you have to go
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 4: into fentanyl. Yeah. And that's where they're lacing everything from
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 4: cocaine to opiates, Molly ecstasy.
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 2: The other question people have that this is a con,
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 2: Why would someone want to put fentanyl in their drugs?
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 2: Because then they lose a client forever. What is the
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: point of it? Is it just like a filler of a,
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 2: when you make the fake drugs?
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 4: What is it? I've asked this question a million times
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 4: to myself, to a million other people. The answers I've
• 1:23:57
  Speaker 4: gotten are, so it's cheaper for the supplier. It cuts
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 4: it up. They're also, if you don't overdose from it,
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 4: you get very addicted to it. So you go back.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 4: But that's an amazing question that I've asked myself so
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 4: many times and other people, a lot of whom can't
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 4: give me an answer.
• 1:24:15
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:24:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 2: This has been like this has been amazing. I mean,
• 1:24:21
  Speaker 2: it's it's just really it's such an important thing. And
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 2: I feel for anybody that's struggling. What do you think? Oh,
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 2: I know I was going to. What do you think
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 2: about like there's like apps and stuff that are just
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 2: like to cut down on drinking? Just like. you know,
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 2: you have an app to make sure how many steps
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 2: did I get in? And there's like these things where like,
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 2: you know, you don't want to give it up, but
• 1:24:41
  Speaker 2: you want some type of something to not have as
• 1:24:46
  Speaker 2: many cocktails a week or whatever.
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 4: So I'm just not aware of any apps like that
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 4: or how they work. Yeah. I've never heard about it.
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 2: I've just seen it pop up.
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I mean, I think whatever works for you, you
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 4: got to keep doing it. But it's almost like when
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 4: you're an addict right now, I feel like You have
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 4: to come to the place. You said like as a
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 4: family member, what you can do. They have to come
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 4: to the place where they're ready to get sober themselves.
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 4: And for some people that's a rock bottom or a struggle.
• 1:25:13
  Speaker 4: You know, I was listening to Ben Affleck on Howard
• 1:25:16
  Speaker 4: Stern and it was like such a game changer for
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 4: me because everything I knew that I believe that I
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 4: was told I was wrong or that contradicted, he was
• 1:25:25
  Speaker 4: saying was right. Reward works. Attraction works. The key to
• 1:25:31
  Speaker 4: sobriety is struggle and helping others. Trying to think what
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 4: I'm leaving out there. You know, you got to really,
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 4: really replace addiction with connection. Is that connection to your work?
• 1:25:45
  Speaker 4: For me, it's connection with other people. You know, now
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 4: my purpose is just, I know if my story just
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 4: helps anyone, how helpless I've felt in so many times,
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 4: that's all I want. Yeah. And I want to really
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 4: be able to help anybody Um, especially if they just
• 1:26:02
  Speaker 4: feel like they can't afford it, what their options are. Um,
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 4: I'm not saying that they can afford me, but I
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 4: want to try to work with them and find them help.
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 2: Well, I think that's really great. And, um, we're going
• 1:26:13
  Speaker 2: to leave everything where they can find you, but it
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 2: is at breakthrough. Dot recovery is your Instagram.
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I just set it up because it's pretty private.
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 2: Yes, we're just starting it. And so I'll put all
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 2: this too in my descriptions, but it's breakthroughrecovery.com and breakthroughrecoveryco
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 2: at Gmail if you want to just email and ask
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 2: Josh any questions or whatever. I'm glad you came out here.
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 2: I think this is such an important thing for people
• 1:26:48
  Speaker 2: for everybody because everyone if.
• 1:26:50
  Speaker 4: You're not struggling with some type of addiction I feel
• 1:26:52
  Speaker 4: like everybody has somebody in their lives that has affected
• 1:26:56
  Speaker 4: them with addiction and you just.
• 1:26:58
  Speaker 2: Be really careful and also when you are faced with
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 2: someone writing you a prescription or something I mean I
• 1:27:05
  Speaker 2: even when I gave birth I had one stronger pill
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 2: right after that made me kind of nauseous and then
• 1:27:12
  Speaker 2: the next time I gave birth I was just like
• 1:27:14
  Speaker 2: just Tylenol PM I mean that's all I needed I
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 2: didn't have a cesarean so I was okay But, you know,
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 2: I think try.
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 4: To be careful. Be careful what doctors you go to.
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 4: I mean, my doctors are so hesitant on prescribing anything.
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 4: And I think if you want it, you can find
• 1:27:30
  Speaker 4: a doctor that's going to prescribe you what you want.
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 4: So you almost have to be a bit of your
• 1:27:33
  Speaker 4: own doctor. But I think you're safer in the hands
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 4: of a doctor that is really, really operates on the
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 4: side of caution.
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 2: And like, yeah, really think about it because it's like
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 2: you don't know. You know, how it might affect you
• 1:27:47
  Speaker 2: and how you might, based on what's going on in
• 1:27:50
  Speaker 2: your life or your medical history, that you could become addicted.
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 4: And the definition of an addict, well, I think it's
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 4: like sexuality. It's a range.
• 1:27:59
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 1:27:59
  Speaker 4: So you may be a zero or you may be
• 1:28:01
  Speaker 4: a 10, but you can easily get addicted to something
• 1:28:04
  Speaker 4: and not be an addict.
• 1:28:05
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:28:06
  Speaker 4: You know?
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 4: If that makes sense. No, it does.
• 1:28:09
  Speaker 2: I think that's what I'm trying to say.
• 1:28:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah. There's people that are struggling with addictions that may
• 1:28:14
  Speaker 4: not be an addict and that's why they may decide
• 1:28:16
  Speaker 4: they can go drink wine or whatever they want to do.
• 1:28:19
  Speaker 4: I really think it's different for every case. For me,
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 4: I learned with drugs that I was clearly addicted and
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 4: I call myself an addict. I don't call myself an alcoholic,
• 1:28:30
  Speaker 4: but I call myself an addict and I I can't,
• 1:28:33
  Speaker 4: I just won't indulge in any, any substance.
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 2: Well, thank you so much. I really appreciate you coming in.
• 1:28:40
  Speaker 2: I know you're going to help a lot of people.
• 1:28:44
  Speaker 3: Christmas shopping has already started in our house. My daughter
• 1:28:47
  Speaker 3: is so organised, already planning Christmas gifts from Macaulay. Hair
• 1:28:51
  Speaker 3: care for her aunt and a fab fragrance for her bestie.
• 1:28:54
  Speaker 3: But the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I'm
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 3: an early bird, buying one present a week from now
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 3: till Christmas, which makes budgeting less stressful. I can buy
• 1:29:02
  Speaker 3: in-store or online from Macaulay.ie for home delivery or free
• 1:29:06
  Speaker 3: click and collect.
• 1:29:07
  Speaker 2: So easy.
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 3: Gifts they'll cherish at prices you'll love.