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Why So Many Men Are In Unhappy Marriages · THINK BEFORE YOU SLEEP

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: When we purchased the Julian Price house, they told us
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: that we'd not only get the house, but that we
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: were gonna get the house and the hoarder.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I don't mean to be really blunt. This is no
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: longer your home. All the stuff must leave this house.
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: You have every right to look at all of this
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: and say, my God, you're a hoarder. But the truth is,
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: I do not perceive myself as a hoarder.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: So we can throw that container away with the sand
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: in it?
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: No.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Why not? Can we throw the sand away?
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: No.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: I think it's important that people understand what is required
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: to effectively solve serious problems in a relationship, and more importantly,
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: how the government has made that impossible in a marriage.
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: The reason men are moving away from marriage is not
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: because of irrational fear. It's because there's no possible recourse
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: in the event that the relationship goes south because of
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: what the woman is doing. Women have recourse on men,
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: but men don't have it for women. and in order
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: for there to be a power balance, both sides have
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: to be able to instill consequences if the other side
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: is behaving inappropriately. Otherwise, both parties will be unhappy. No
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: woman is happy being married to a pushover, and no
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: man is happy about being bossed around all the time
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: because he's afraid of family court. This episode of Hoarders
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: is a perfect example of what I'm talking about. It
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: follows a gay couple who purchase a four-story, 31-room house
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: in Greensboro, NC, that was foreclosed on by the bank.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: They were able to buy this mansion for only $ 400, 000
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: because they agreed to deal with the squatter who was
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: in the house. The squatter, Sandra, was a formerly successful
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: interior designer who bought so much crap that she filled
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: up every room of the 31-room house and every hallway.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: This episode was so ridiculous that I almost would think
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: it's fake, but my late aunt was a hoarder, and
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: after she died, my family spent two weeks removing all
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: the garbage out of her apartment. There was literally trash everywhere.
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: And it's the same with Sandra. She is literally collecting garbage.
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: Wayne, can you set this.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: In the wagon? It's just heavy. I'm afraid I'll trip.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: It's a rock. Yeah, I know. You're on the same rock.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: That needs to go with me to the car to
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: wash and use to.
• 2:19
  Speaker 4: Clean up with.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: VHS tapes, CDs, plastic pulls for children, bent trading cards,
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: and broken furniture that people left on the street. It's
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: almost like she's lived 40 years without ever taking out
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: the trash. But anyway, the reason Sandra is being evicted
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: is because she refinanced the house a bunch of times
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: and then didn't pay her mortgage for like five years.
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: She's remained there for about three years fighting the various foreclosures,
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: which is pretty extraordinary, actually. That's a heck of a fight.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: My goal is to have the legal system invalidate the foreclosure.
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: If it gets invalidated, then that puts me back as
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: the real owner of the house, which is.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: What I want. Sandra ran up over $ 2 million of
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: debt and tried to get the loan invalidated. She did
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: this on the premise that the banks were bailed out
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: in 2008, so she wanted the taxpayers to bail out
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: $ 2 million of her irresponsibility and kick out the new
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: owners of the house. This is despite the fact that
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: she thinks it's perfectly fine to own a $ 6, 000 to $ 10, 000 desk.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: And listen to me. It's a $ 6, 000 desk, a $ 10, 000 desk,
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: and it is insane to let those get away. Obviously,
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: she should have sold that when she got into financial troubles,
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: but Sandra has decided that she cares way more about
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: material garbage than she cares about her well-being or even
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: her family.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: I'm Earl. I'm Sandra's brother.
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: You don't want to throw any of this away. Why
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: are you wasting your effort when you could let these
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: folks that are here to help you carry this stuff
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: out of your past?
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: So you understand.
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: Earl, stop it!
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: Okay. Now!
• 4:06
  Speaker 4: I am not a friggin' idiot and I understand.
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: Every bit of it!
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: Listen to how she speaks to her brother. Her brother
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: who has taken three days out of his life to
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: help her clean so that she can keep some of
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: her stuff. She's not grateful at all for that. She
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: would much rather have him gone so she can sleep
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: in her pile of garbage. She even cared more about
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: that house than she did her own husband.
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: In 1979, somebody approached my husband wanting to buy the
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: house and tear it down. And he says, well, if
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: you love me, you'll do it. I went, whoa, whoa, whoa.
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: If you love me, you won't ask me to do it.
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: So he left.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: Now, you have to be careful when you listen, because
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: manipulative people will often leave out important details of the
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: story to make it look like they're on the right.
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: the reality is that her husband didn't just out of
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: nowhere ask her to agree to sell the house. Judging
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: by the way she handles her finances, they were probably
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: deeply in debt, and the husband, as a responsible adult,
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: was trying to sell the house to pay off that debt.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: She ended up choosing the house instead of him. I
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: don't know what their exact situation was with the marriage,
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: but to every other man who is married, that's pretty
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: much it. If a woman decides she's not going to
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: budge on an issue, even if it's her being a
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: drug addict, She has complete power, and what she says goes.
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: Because if she doesn't get her way, then she can
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: own half your stuff. She can garnish your wages for
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: child support and alimony. She can lie and say you
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: abused her, and while she's at that, she can use
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: the kids as human shields. This is why men back
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: down when their wives are abusing them and stay in
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: unhappy marriages. They know the consequences of the contract they've signed.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: If you are having a serious conversation where you're discussing
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: problems in the relationship, and she starts calling you stupid,
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: talking about how much better of a person she is,
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: I do everything for you, you do nothing for me,
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: or she starts screaming, then that's pretty much it. The
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: argument's over.
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: She wins.
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: There are no consequences you can give in response to
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: her abuse because she can just ruin you in family court.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: You are defenseless as a man. And you have to understand,
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: a person like Sandra or a woman who is set
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: in her ways will never ever be convinced with words
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: that she has a problem.
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: Sandra feels that Bank of America never had a clear
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: lean against the home.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: In a conversation with one of Sandra's brothers, it was
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: brought to my attention that she was considering continuing her
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: legal battle to regain possession of the house.
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: She's still hoping that that court No. So?
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: We purchased the house legally, and we're doing all of
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: this to benefit her. We do not want to drag
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: our family through this. We do not want to incur
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: additional legal expenses.
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: We want to keep these crates.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna pull the plug on this entire process if
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: she's gonna go ahead.
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: With the lawsuit. I'm asking the bank to admit they
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: had no intention right to foreclose or sell the property.
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: That's what I'm asking for.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: But if you win that, you've essentially undone everything that's
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: been done.
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: We have a trial in February 27, and I go
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: to court Wednesday.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: You've just cost me $ 200, 000 in legal fees.
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: For what?
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: To defend myself.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: To now go to the bank and defend themselves. Only
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: if you want to do that.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: So I would have bought a house that I no
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: longer own, that you've just as potentially taken back. We've
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: brought all of this in here to help you.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: Wait, wait, wait.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: Sold it for you so you have money.
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: He's trying to maneuver me into positions that will keep
• 7:49
  Speaker 4: him where he is right now, that the house is
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: his and me out of here in two more days.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: I guess we're not saying it clear enough. Like, maybe
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: it needs to come out of your mouth.
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: This has to end.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: Despite that she made a bunch of terrible choices with money,
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: despite that her house was purchased by someone else after
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: it foreclosed, despite the fact that these guys were nice
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: enough to allow her to keep her stuff, even though
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: they owned it, they allowed her to keep her stuff,
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: pick out the things she wanted, sell the really valuable
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: stuff at auction for her, and she's still trying to
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: sue to keep the house. She's perfectly fine with costing
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: the owners, Eric and Michael, hundreds of thousands of dollars...
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: when they are trying to help her. They could have
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: just thrown all of her stuff in the trash. Why
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: is she treating them like that? Because she's getting what
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: she wants. The only way to get her to listen
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: is to take that away, which they did. They threatened
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: to tell the workers to trash all of her stuff
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: instead of letting her keep it or sell it. Now,
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: with a marriage, a man can't do that. If she
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: is a drug addict or a hoarder and she can
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: lie well enough, then she can get the courts to
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: force you to pay for her addiction instead claiming it's
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: for the children. As a man, you can't say no.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: The government forces you with alimony and child support to
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: enable an abuser. I mean, look how bad this all is.
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: Look how little she cares about other people. She had
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: three days to remove all the stuff off the property.
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: After the second day, she stayed up all night so
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: she could pull all the items they threw into the
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: dumpster and put them out in the street so it
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: would be off the property line. And that created a blockade.
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: She had nowhere to take it, and I fully believe
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: that she intended to leave this stuff there on the
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: street and camp in front of it in her van.
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: This is about finding you housing and making you some money.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: What's the most important thing to you?
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: I don't have a need for housing at all. May
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: we please take that off?
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: No, you do. You live in that van right there.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: You do have an issue for me. Does she think
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: people want that? Does she, as an interior designer, think
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: that people want a homeless lady in a car full
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: of trash? with two dogs and a pile of garbage
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: behind her camping out in front of a half a
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: million dollar home? Does she think the neighbors want that? Well,
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: they didn't because one of them called the police and
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: that phone call resulted in the most gratifying scene in
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: this episode of Hoarders. She had until 4 p.m. to
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: remove all the stuff off the street and she missed
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: it by a lot. So the city took their little
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: claw and crushed her crap as they lifted it into
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: a dumpster. Let's watch.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: Couches, pictures, vases, picking them up and dropping them into
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: trucks and smashing them.
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: People on the show seem to be upset about it,
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: but I thought it was a very fitting punishment for
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: the harm she caused the owners of the house and
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: society with her frivolous lawsuits. Now, Sandra didn't start out
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: like this. She was a top-tier designer where at one
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: point people would wait two years to have their houses
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: designed by her. Then she got sued by one of
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: her customers for doing a botched job. After the lawsuit,
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: she probably got into financial trouble because she lost her business.
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: Her husband wanted to sell the house, but she refused,
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: so her husband left her. From there, she just kept
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: spiraling more and more downward with no one keeping her
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: in check. Even though Sandra is a severe case, The
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: reality is that with enough trauma and with enough loss,
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: anybody can do some pretty self-destructive things. When those people
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: start down that path, the only way to get them
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: to stop is to begin removing your support and begin
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: removing your attention. The only time Sandra ever listened to
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: anyone in that episode was because people gave her negative
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: consequences for not listening. Look at it this way. She
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: remained in a house that she wasn't paying for for
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: five years. She only left that house when the police
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: forced her off the property after it was sold. She
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: threatened to continue the frivolous lawsuit to keep the house,
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: but stopped when the new owners threatened to throw her
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: stuff in the garbage. She intended to leave all of
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: her crap on the street and only stressed herself to
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: move it because the city came with big machines and
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: destroyed any crap that was left on the street. No
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: amount of rational conversation is going to change these people.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: So if you are in a marriage where your wife
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: is out of line, there is nothing you can do.
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: Let's say she wastes all the grocery money on a
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: new handbag. What are you going to do? You can't
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: withdraw financial support. That's financial abuse. And if you piss
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: her off enough, she can just divorce you and have
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: the government force you to pay her. This is why
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: so many marriages are in the toilet and why so
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: many men are unhappy. And by the way, without these
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: checks and balances, the women aren't happy either. Do you
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: think Sandra is happy going unchecked, letting her life spiral
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: out of control?
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: No.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: She is a former aristocrat who is now homeless living
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: in a van. A van filled with everything, therefore nothing
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: is valuable. Look at those crazy eyes she makes. Look
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: at how she treats people. She is miserable. She got
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: sued once a couple decades ago, lost her business, broke
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: up her marriage, and then just gave up. If you're
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: in a marriage where your wife gives up, then there
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: is literally nothing you can do except prepare for financial disaster.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: It's really kind of sad. I've watched several men in
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: my life go through it. Recently, I watched one of
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: them gain a good 100 pounds in the past year
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: because of the stress his crazy wife puts on him.
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: And there is nothing he can do to make it
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: better because she refuses to do anything and he knows
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: she will financially destroy him if he creates consequences for
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: her bad behavior. But honestly, if we allow things to
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: get bad enough, any one of us can become like
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: the hoarder in this episode. Any one of us can
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: be thrown into a downward spiral. Maybe some of you
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: have been there And maybe some of you are there
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: right now. You certainly have a good excuse. A lot
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: of people have lost their jobs because of the Chinese flu.
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: I've read many comments from people who just want to
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: throw in the towel and give up. But I think
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: of it this way. There are plenty of people out
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: there who have survived way worse. I recently listened to
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: a story that's linked in the description on the Jocko
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: Willink podcast about a woman, Rose Schindler, who survived Auschwitz
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: as a teenager. Both of her parents died. All of
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: her brothers were murdered. All she had left of her
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: family of 11 were her two older sisters and a
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: few pieces of jewelry. She made it, and she's still
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: alive today. I mean, I'll take unemployment over that any day.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: People have survived a lot worse. Don't allow the stress
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: of this situation to make you weak. There are ways
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: around your situation, and there are ways to ensure that
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: this doesn't happen again with you. Maybe this crisis was
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: the wake-up call you needed to get your life in order.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: Imagine that if instead of facing this living paycheck to paycheck,
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: you had three to six months of your living expenses
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: saved up. Great. Have a nice little vacation. Watch some Netflix.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: Play some video games. Read a book. Who cares? You're
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: doing fine. If you didn't do that this time, make
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: sure you're ready for the next time. Or think of
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: it this way. Maybe losing your job was just what
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: you needed to take a chance at something better. A
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: lot of people get complacent, they get comfortable, and they
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: just sit where they are. This could be a good thing.
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: So instead of giving up, think of ways out. Otherwise,
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: you'll end up miserable like Sandra. But if you sit down,
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: you focus on it, you think about it, you put
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: all of your attention towards it, you get frustrated about it,
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: you're going to think of something. There are plenty of
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: things out there for you. Give it time, and you'll
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: figure it out. But that's enough for this video. If
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: you liked it, hit the like button, subscribe if you're new,
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: comment and share, If you would like to support this channel,
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: then you can do so with PayPal, Patreon, or Subscribestar.
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: All of those links are on my channel page or
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: in the description. Last, if you haven't checked me out
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: on BitChute yet, then you can also find that by
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: clicking the link in the description or on my channel page.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: Other than that, thanks for watching. See you in the
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: next video.