Latest / In The Driver's Seat / The Dream Killer Might Be the Person You Told First
Transcript
- ep33 final in the driver's seat: that feeling when an idea starts coming together and you get so excited you can hardly keep it to yourself. You're imagining what it would look like, looking into the possibilities and thinking, my gosh, I would love to do this. Then you tell someone, and before you're done describing this beautiful vision, they've found seventeen things that That could go wrong. Well, I was having a pretty good time with it until about 30 seconds ago. They may be someone you love, someone whose opinion you value. So even when you recognize that their reaction comes from their own fears, their words can follow you for the rest of the day. You're trying to work on your idea, and now you have Company in your head. Be thoughtful about who gets that invitation. Welcome to In the Driver's Seat. I am Lisa French, a former race car driver turned empowerment coach. I teach people to intentionally create a life they love. Subscribe or follow for more mindset, possibility, and the choices that help us create a life that we're excited to live. Maintaining privacy protects your energy. When you have a dream you're excited about, there's so much pleasure in discovering what it could become. You investigate something and that leads to something else. Before you know it, you've spent an entire afternoon learning about a possibility that wasn't even on your radar a week ago. I love that feeling. Safeguard your excitement. You're developing a vision and your beliefs about it are taking shape as you explore. Keeping it private lets you spend that time discovering what you want and following what draws you forward. Say you've wanted to write a book for years. You finally sit down, start putting your thoughts on a paper, and discover you have more to say than you realized. You're enjoying yourself, you're thinking about the next chapter while you're getting ready for work. Then you mention it to someone who immediately tells you how hard it is to get published, how many books never sell, and how their cousin spent three years writing one and nothing happened. Good grief. My chapter barely has a title and you've already buried the book. Now You have to decide what to do with those comments. You can disagree with every word and still find yourself thinking about them later. Your belief in the book can remain strong while your energy gets pulled toward explaining, defending, or mentally answering someone who has already gone home. Maintaining privacy protects you. From inviting that negativity into the process in the first place. You get to spend the evening writing the next page, enjoying what's coming together, and discovering what you're capable of. I'm intentional about the energy I bring into what I'm creating. The thoughts I entertain, the feelings I nurture, and the beliefs I reinforce all influence how I show up. When I'm excited, I'm curious. I follow an idea, I notice opportunity, I'm willing to take another step because I want to see where it leads. That's an experience I want you to enjoy. And I get to choose how many outside opinions become part of it. Someone else may have very different beliefs about what's possible. They've had experiences that have shaped those beliefs, just as I've had experiences that shaped mine. If they watch someone lose money in a business, starting a business may sound frightening to them. If they've spent thirty years building security in one job, leaving familiar work may seem unreasonable. They can care deeply about you and struggle to understand why. Why you would choose something they would never choose for themselves. Their concern can be sincere. You can appreciate their concern and still recognize whose life experience is speaking to you. When I moved from Iowa to Florida in 2018, there was a lot of enthusiasm around what I was doing. For anyone who's new here, I left a job. and a community I had been a part of for years and moved myself to Panama City Beach. I had never been here and I had an R V as a moving vehicle. The decision to move developed as I explored possibilities. I started looking into things. Something sounded fun, I learned more, and the excitement grew. Eventually I was preparing to go. Once I resigned from my job, People became invested in my story. I was writing blogs and sharing my adventures on social media, and people wanted to follow along. I loved that. It was so fun to show people my new experiences, and I wanted people to feel inspired by it. If watching me make a change helped someone believe they could pursue something they wanted, wonderful. That was part of why I enjoyed telling the story. But sharing also invited opinions. There were questions about what I was going to do, suggestions about how I should handle something, and concerns about me doing things by myself. Most people meant well. They were thinking about my well being. Meanwhile, I felt good. I had strong faith in what I was doing and I believed I would figure things out along the way. I enjoyed the adventure I was living. I remember being aware of that balance. How much did I want to share? How much concern did I want to engage with? I wanted to communicate with people who cared about me, and I also wanted to protect the energy I was bringing into this new life. I couldn't tell you exactly how I handled every post eight years ago. I I do know my conviction stayed strong. And that experience helped me recognize that you can enjoy sharing your life while being thoughtful about how much access you give people to the decisions behind it. With a dream you're still nurturing, you have that same choice about access. You can keep something for yourself while discovering what that means to you and how you want to pursue it. Perhaps you want your paintings displayed in a gallery someday. For now, you're taking a class, trying different techniques, and finding out what you love to paint. There's a whole experience available before you announce the ambition to anyone. Allow yourself to enjoy the experience of becoming the person in your imagination. Each painting teaches you something. You begin noticing what you do well And what you want to develop. Your belief gains substance through your own participation. You've spent time with this dream. You know how you feel when you're involved in it. And you discover how much you're willing to put into it. I want you to have that journey without feeling obligated to provide updates for everyone who knows you. There's something satisfying about having a part of your life that belongs. Only to you. A desire you're exploring, a project you look forward to working on. You can finish something, feel proud of it, and let that be enough for the day. You can also have a frustrating afternoon and work through it without hearing, I knew this was a bad idea. You're allowed to learn as you go. You're allowed to change your mind about the details. Keeping those early steps private gives you the freedom to make those decisions based on what you're discovering. And when you want support, be selective. Find a teacher who can help you develop your skills, a friend who enjoys your enthusiasm, or someone with experience in the thing you're pursuing. Think about who you feel comfortable being excited around, who listens with interest. Who helps you see the possibilities you haven't considered? Those are the perfect type of people to include. I enjoy sharing my life and I love inspiring someone to pursue something they want. I'm also naturally private. Both are part of who I am, and I decide what I share and what I keep for myself. You get to make that decision too. Loving someone doesn't obligate you to involve them in every plan. Their closeness to you doesn't guarantee they'll understand a vision that came to you. Appreciate the relationship and be thoughtful about which parts of your life you bring into it. Your dream deserves your enthusiasm, your attention, and your willingness to keep going. Choose support. That helps nurture those things. Think of one dream you'd love to pursue. When you picture it, what lights you up? Stay with that for a moment. Imagine yourself involved in it, learning, creating, experiencing something you've wanted. Then choose one thing you can do to move toward it. Sign up for a class, start that first page. Pick up the paintbrush. Let yourself experience taking that step before deciding what you want to tell anyone. Pay attention to how it feels to follow through on something because you wanted it. There's satisfaction in knowing you're participating in your own vision. Let yourself enjoy that. My Free Future Self Journal is linked in the description if you like help connecting with a life that you're imagining. It gives you a place to explore that vision and the feeling of living it, something you can return to as you move forward. I want you to feel excited about what's possible for you, having something you look forward to working on and catch yourself smiling when you think about. where it could lead. That's a beautiful part of creating a life you love. Be selective about who you invite into that experience. You can keep a dream close to your heart while you take it seriously enough to act on it. Let your energy go toward bringing it to life. Thank you for being here. Until next time, remember you're always in the driver's seat of your life.