Latest / I Do, Part 2 / Bring Me A Man in 2026

Transcript

Bring Me A Man in 2026 · I Do, Part 2

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: iHeart podcasts, bring you the ultimate summer of love Tree.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: This is Famously Available. Hey, it's Ben Higgins back with
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: you on Famously Available. Make sure to catch up on
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: the last episode. I am handing over the microphones to
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: all three of our amazing famously Available women, Kathy, Dianna,
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: the Mercedes. I want to know what they're looking forward
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: to in twenty twenty six as we enter the new year.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: So let's jump back into their conversation.
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: Man, it feels like everybody's had a tough twenty twenty five.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Is there anything that you're looking to leave behind?
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: Ooh, you're going to laugh when I say it. So
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: I said it last year too, and I will say
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: I've made improvement this year. What is it? Interrupting people
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: while we are laughing.
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: But that's a good goal. That's a good goal, you
• 0:59
  Speaker 4: know what I mean.
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: I am better this year than I was last year,
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: So I I you know, I left half of it
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: behind last year. I want to leave the other half
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: behind this year.
• 1:09
  Speaker 4: That's an awesome goal. I love that.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: It's funny because I believe as people, we think that
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: our opinion is so important that we need to be
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: heard right Instead of actively listening. That is equality that
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: is really important to me when I'm looking to date
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: is someone who is an active listener. But we as humans,
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: I believe it is in our nature. We think that
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: our opinion is so important. We think we need to
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: be heard, and truth of the matter is is nine
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: times out of ten, it's really not important.
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: Or we don't like silence. We're awkward, awkward, so let's
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: fill it. You know before I'm going to interrupt you
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: because you might not say anything and then it'll be quiet, so.
• 1:45
  Speaker 5: Then we will. Yeah. I feel that I'm kind of
• 1:49
  Speaker 5: like that where I'm like, I don't want anything to
• 1:50
  Speaker 5: ever feel awkward, so I'm always like, okay, I need
• 1:53
  Speaker 5: to like start talking. What can I say? And I
• 1:54
  Speaker 5: still like it keeps going Okay, something I want to leave.
• 2:00
  Speaker 5: In twenty twenty five, this one's like kind of deep,
• 2:03
  Speaker 5: but I feel like it's like the thing that like
• 2:06
  Speaker 5: is coming to me is like negative talk when it
• 2:10
  Speaker 5: comes to like myself, I feel like I get like
• 2:13
  Speaker 5: when I'm on dates or when I'm like even if
• 2:15
  Speaker 5: I meet new people, like, I'm like, do they think
• 2:17
  Speaker 5: I was weird? Like you know what I'm saying and
• 2:20
  Speaker 5: I'm so unapologetically myself, but at the same time, I
• 2:23
  Speaker 5: still do have these voices in my head. No one
• 2:25
  Speaker 5: would ever know except for me that I'm like, did
• 2:28
  Speaker 5: they think I was weird? That's like my biggest thing
• 2:30
  Speaker 5: is like do they think I was weird? Which is
• 2:31
  Speaker 5: so crazy because I know it's not true, and I
• 2:34
  Speaker 5: know that it's just the enemy in my head trying
• 2:36
  Speaker 5: to like bring me down. So that's something that I
• 2:39
  Speaker 5: really want to like just kick out and say, Syinara,
• 2:42
  Speaker 5: stay in twenty twenty five.
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: I love that for you. Yeah, you're not alone, Just
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: so you know you're not alone.
• 2:48
  Speaker 5: I know, I know. It's a very common thing.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there, I can take one thought and turn it
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: eight way sideways in a matter of seconds.
• 2:55
  Speaker 5: Yes, Oh I'm an overthinker for sure.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: We all could do that. But to be aware, self
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: aware enough that you're doing it that right, there is
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: half the battle, Mercedes. Yeah, for all of us. If
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: you recognize it, then you can sort of say, nope,
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: I'm not going to let that happen. I'm going to
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: turn from that before it really gets its grips on me.
• 3:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's something that I have also been working on
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: this year, and I don't always see the improvement in myself.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: It is much easier for me to see the improvement
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: in you guys or someone else.
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: But I would say that I go down the rabbit
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: hole less.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: It still happens because I am human, so I have
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: to have some grace with myself. But I go down
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: the rabbit hole less, I spin out of control, just
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: a little bit less. And so I'll take those as
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: wins because you used to. I could spend days mother
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: mother effing anyone.
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: So what do you want to leave behind or is
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: that what you want to leave behind? Diana?
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: Well, no, no, Mine is kind of deep too, and
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: I think that's just because of the transformative year that
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: I have had. But I want to leave my old
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: self behind.
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: I think there's all of you behind.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: Nope, no, but I just think that what I have
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: gone through over the last few years. And Kathy, we
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: have discussed this, like, divorce is grief, right, there are
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: many many versions of grief, and my divorce was very
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: much grief for me, and I rode every wave and
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: so there is this beautiful piece where like I still
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: am me, but I also get to be a different
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: version of me, and I think I have spent a
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: lot of time feeding into myself and doing a law
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: of work, you guys, doing a law of work all
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: the therapy. I am a person of growth. I will
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: I will jump on any experience to learn more about
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: myself and to be better with myself. I'm going to
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: a retreat in January and I'm going to meditate, and
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: I'm going to listen to my own like inner voice
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: and be one with God, you know. And I am
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: so excited because so ex I have always been like that, like, please, yeah,
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: tell me what I did wrong. I want to work
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: on that. I want to grow. I want to be better.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: I want to be better for myself. But I also
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: just want to be a better woman and a better mother.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: I don't want my children to experience the same grief
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: and heartache that I have that I have had, and
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: so I just want to be a better person. So
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: I say that I want to leave my old self
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: behind because I think it's really wonderful that I get
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: to learn more about myself this year and I get
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: to choose greatness. I get to choose to be different,
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: I get to choose to pause. You guys, I too,
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: Kathy believe that my opinion is very important that I.
• 5:30
  Speaker 4: Need to be heard as it is not everybody needs
• 5:33
  Speaker 4: to hear it.
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: Wait, I have a question for both of you though,
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: And I think Deanna, you and I have touched on this,
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: but your horrific divorce. Mercedes, I don't know. I'm sure
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: in your fabulous, beautiful twenty seven years of life, I'm
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: sure you've had heartache and this appointment because we all have,
• 6:01
  Speaker 3: none of us escape it. My question do you both?
• 6:03
  Speaker 5: Then?
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: I ponder this all the time because of my husband's suicide,
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: Because of what I've been through, I am a better person.
• 6:11
  Speaker 3: I did a ton of grief therapy. Here's my question.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: Do you think it takes that kind of cataclysmic, catastrophic
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: event for us to work as hard as we are
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: working to be better people? Like? That's what I wonder,
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: like sometimes say, God, really, you know? Did I need this?
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: Couldn't you just like broken my wrist or something? You know? Slightly?
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: I kind of love this question, Yeah, I mean I
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: love this question. And Mercedes, I know that you're a
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: Christian as well, so I don't believe in a punishing God.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: I believe we are given free will to make decisions.
• 6:49
  Speaker 3: I agree.
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: We are allowed to do that.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: And therefore there are consequences for our actions when you
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: try to deviate from the path you are meant to
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: be on. When you deviate from that, you get to
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: reap the consequences, whether they are good or bad, consequences
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: for our choices and our actions. So, if you are
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: allowed allow yourself to relinquish full control and let your universe,
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: your God, your higher being, whatever it is, have full
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: control of your life. If you can truly do that,
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: then you could have less heartache, less grief, less things
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: if you're able to get yourself on the right path.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: But as humans, we are allowed fore will to make
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: our own decisions, and therefore sometimes we have consequences for
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: our actions. So if I'm going to use myself, for example,
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: I sometimes look back at my marriage. I'm not sure
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: why I married that person, other than my children are
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: my greatest gifts. I was meant to have Addison and Austin.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: They were made for me. That's what I believe. Call
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: me nuts whatever you want, I believe my children were
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: made for me.
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: They were a gift.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: My God knew that I needed them in my life,
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: that I needed those kids and the only way to
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: have those two children was to have them with my
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: ex husband.
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  Speaker 4: They are my greatest gift.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: I could not have made them without him. But because
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: of some of the decisions that I made and the
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: path that I walked, I had to endure grief and
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: heartache and pain, and he did as well. Because ultimately,
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: I don't believe that we are supposed to spend a
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: lifetime together.
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: I don't know, what do you think, Mercedes.
• 8:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean I'm with you, like the same thing. Like,
• 8:35
  Speaker 5: I do not think God does anything to punish us.
• 8:38
  Speaker 5: I think God is like, he's not chaos, He's not
• 8:42
  Speaker 5: so anything outside of that I don't think is necessarily
• 8:46
  Speaker 5: from him or was meant for us. But I do
• 8:49
  Speaker 5: think back to Kathy's question, like my heartbreak, I had
• 8:54
  Speaker 5: never so I experienced heartbreak when I was twenty three
• 8:58
  Speaker 5: or four. I think, worst thing ever. And I know
• 9:02
  Speaker 5: that it probably it did like I was a twenty three,
• 9:04
  Speaker 5: twenty four year old whatever like, But genuinely I was like,
• 9:07
  Speaker 5: I do not wish this feeling upon anyone. I felt
• 9:12
  Speaker 5: like I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep.
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: It was.
• 9:14
  Speaker 5: It was genuinely the worst thing ever. And because of
• 9:18
  Speaker 5: that I feel like I had so much hate in
• 9:21
  Speaker 5: my heart towards that person, because I'm like, why would
• 9:23
  Speaker 5: you do this to me? Like why are we doing this?
• 9:25
  Speaker 5: Like can we try to figure it out? Whatever? But
• 9:29
  Speaker 5: I will say because of that, it gave me values
• 9:33
  Speaker 5: that I love about myself now. Like the only way
• 9:36
  Speaker 5: I got over that was because I prayed for him,
• 9:38
  Speaker 5: and I was like, he needs he needs healing, and
• 9:41
  Speaker 5: it has nothing to do with me. It has everything
• 9:43
  Speaker 5: to do with him, and he needs healing, so let
• 9:44
  Speaker 5: me pray for him. And it made me forgive him.
• 9:46
  Speaker 5: And now everything I do in life, like if someone
• 9:50
  Speaker 5: makes me mad or someone does me wrong, like I
• 9:52
  Speaker 5: pray for them and it's I don't know. It just
• 9:55
  Speaker 5: completely changed my thought and it took me like a
• 9:58
  Speaker 5: year to get there, but now I feel like it
• 10:01
  Speaker 5: because I went through heartbreak and because I went through that,
• 10:04
  Speaker 5: now I have something about me that I know what
• 10:07
  Speaker 5: to do when people do do me wrong. And it
• 10:10
  Speaker 5: just completely changed my life.
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: That's beautiful too. Yeah, just to be clear, that's beautiful, Mercedes.
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: And by the way, do not diminish when you say
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: I was only twenty three or twenty four. Do not
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: diminish your heartbreak, what you went through, that's as real
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: as anything that I've gone through. That's your life, and
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: your life has all as much value as our lives do.
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: So yeah, But just to be clear, though, I wasn't
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: saying that God punished me. I was saying, if God
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: wanted my attention, obviously my husband of the free will,
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: I agree with you, Dianna to do what he did.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: But at the same time, I also believe that God
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: is in control of our lives, and so I'm thinking
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: God was trying to really get my attention, which he did, uh,
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: you know, whiplash. But that that was my question sort
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: of now a question, more of a comment. I wish
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: that it didn't we didn't. I wish Johnny, you didn't
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: have to go through the horrible divorce to get you
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: where you are today. I wish I didn't have to
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: go through what I went through. Mercedes, I wish that
• 11:20
  Speaker 3: that hadn't happened to you. But I realized saying that
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: at the same time, you know, as we close out
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: this fabulous here, that these that life lessons. I mean,
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: life is what happens to us on the way to death.
• 11:32
  Speaker 3: You know, we have all these lessons, and I just
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: I sometimes wish it they weren't quite so stringent, quite
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: such a big smack across the face. And having said that,
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: I am a much better person. I joke all the
• 11:43
  Speaker 3: time that the guy that gets me, mister Wright, who
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: is right around the corner, he is getting so much
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: of a better version of me than than my husband had,
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: which is sad to say.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: I hate the saying that there's beauty and pain, Yeah,
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: because there is is right the pain and exactly what
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: you said you went through, Mercedes, like we've all done it, right,
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: We've all done it. I did it just a few
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: years ago. There were days I could not get out
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: of the bed. Had I not had children, I would
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: not have gotten out.
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: Of the bed. It is awful.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: But then there when I say that rebirth, you guys
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: for me, look at the beauty in that, Look at
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: the beauty in that. Yes, I would have absolutely And
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: my ex husband is not my only heartache, right, I had,
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: like grateful to have loved many times and loved really
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: great guys like I wouldn't change that for the world.
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: I might change some of this circumstances.
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: I might take a few bad decisions back, But like
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: I am grateful to have loved and lost than to
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: have never loved it all. And I hate cliche sayings.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: I hate them, hate them, hate them, pay them, but
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: it is true I would have taken it over anything.
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: Well, I just want to say, we're we're going to
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: move into what we think about twenty twenty six. Here
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: a second, bet, I just want to say, for me,
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: one of the other fabulous things about twenty twenty five
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: is getting to know both of you and your beautiful
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: such incredible women. But one thing I've learned from both
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: of you that I don't even think you set out
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: to teach me, is that we all it doesn't matter.
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: You know, Mercedes, you're the youngest, Deanna you're in the middle,
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: and I'm bringing up the rear. Hear. But we all
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: are looking for love, We're all looking for connection. We
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: all have families, we love, We all work hard, and
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: that gives me joy to know that there's some consistency
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: in the world that you know, we're on this journey
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: and we're working hard to be the best we can be.
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: But we all Age doesn't really Again another cliche, age
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: is only a number. We usually talk about that in
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: terms of dating. I'm talking about it in terms of you,
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: two guys. Age is only a number. I value you guys,
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: your opinions, your thought, your friendship. So I just wanted
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: you to know that I.
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: Love you guys.
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: I think there is some path for us all, and
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: look at the three of us. Is that we're on
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: the right path right now. The three of us were
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: meant to meet each other this year and do this
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: podcast together. We might not walk off here with the
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: man of our dreams. Oh yeah, oh okay, take me
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: with you.
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: Take me with you.
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: And by the way, Mercedes and Dianna, you will too,
• 14:20
  Speaker 3: believe you know, it's still we're We're in the moment
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: of believe. That's my word for twenty twenty six. What
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: is yours? My word is believe. I believe that good
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: things are out there and we just need to open
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: our eye. Need to keep my eyes open and wait
• 14:35
  Speaker 3: for it and believe that it will happen. And I
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: do believe it. Yeah, what about you, guys, what's your word?
• 14:42
  Speaker 5: My word for twenty twenty six? Let's go with maybe
• 14:49
  Speaker 5: like alignment. That's so good, Like I hope that like
• 14:55
  Speaker 5: everyone that comes into my life is aligned with where
• 14:58
  Speaker 5: I am. That's that's the word amusing and even even
• 15:03
  Speaker 5: people but like also like job opportunities everything, Like I
• 15:08
  Speaker 5: hope it's just all aligned with who I am as
• 15:10
  Speaker 5: a person and my values.
• 15:13
  Speaker 4: I want to steal that. I don't think I have
• 15:15
  Speaker 4: a word.
• 15:16
  Speaker 3: You can have the same word.
• 15:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe I might.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: Maybe I might borrow Mercedes word because I have lots
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: of feelings for it. Like you know what, I think.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: I really want some peace. I want some peace. Yeah,
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: but I have multiple words. I don't know that I
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: can choose one. I want peace, I want acceptance. I
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: want to be fully and holy loved as I am
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: as I was made.
• 15:37
  Speaker 5: I love that.
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: Was that too much to ask?
• 15:39
  Speaker 5: Oh no, not at all.
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: Like I said, keep your eyes open and believe it's
• 15:44
  Speaker 3: coming for you.
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: Well, I don't know how far.
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: However, the line starts here, so it's behind getting lied by.
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well there we are, there we are.
• 16:07
  Speaker 5: Are you on riah or anything? Would you ever do
• 16:09
  Speaker 5: dating apps?
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: I have done dating apps.
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: Kathy and I have had this conversation because I was
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: trying to encourage her to get on them and try it.
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: I applied to be on Riya, but apparently I'm not
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: cool enough either.
• 16:20
  Speaker 4: Mine has not been approved. Yeah, no, you.
• 16:24
  Speaker 5: Guys definitely aren't too old.
• 16:26
  Speaker 4: What's the end? How do you get in on Riya?
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Because it mine just continues to say that my application
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: is being reviewed.
• 16:32
  Speaker 5: Oh I don't know. I mean you have to have
• 16:35
  Speaker 5: did you put like people like references?
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: I did, yeah, and I have like a lot of
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: my references were celebrity friends who are also on the app.
• 16:43
  Speaker 5: Weird.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: Okay, I need you all to suddenly a list of
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: who's on there, because when I applied, they did not.
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: I don't even remember. I don't think I got a
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: response back.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: They pull it from your contacts and sometimes you're in
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: review for a period of time, and I guess they
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: only let us an amount of people on the app,
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: like they meet at one point in time in your area.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: But they'll pull your your references from your contacts. Once
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: you do it, you click on whomever might be on
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: Riya and that person can be your reference. And so
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: I have done that. So I didn't get approved to
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: be on Riya, but I've done bumble And that's for
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: another podcast, Mercedes.
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: That was a bit of a show, shall we say.
• 17:25
  Speaker 5: Okay, I was.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: Really surprised at how many men wanted to send me
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: pictures of their genitalia.
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: Oh and I really bumble. Yeah, And I just didn't
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: want that. It's just not what I'm in it for.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: I don't think the penis is attractive anyway, let alone
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: sending me a picture of it.
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: I don't want it.
• 17:43
  Speaker 5: I don't want it.
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: I don't want it.
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: Yeah, No, that's weird, and especially on the Yeah, no, no.
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: I did meet a couple of guys that I went
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: out with that turned into second or third dates. One
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: guy in particular, I dated off and on for a
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: year and a half and I really really liked him,
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: cared about him, and I have nothing but wonderful things
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: to say. But I just think in the long run,
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: the things that I need to align in the long
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: run weren't there. Like I could never imagine introducing him
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: to my children. Yeah, and that's a huge red flag
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: for me.
• 18:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah. There was one and I can't think of the
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: name of it. I just thought of the name of it,
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: Keller International that approached me when I came off the show.
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: But they wanted me to pay thirty five thousand dollars.
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: It's a membership deal and I just didn't really feel
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: like it sort of felt like I would be I
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: don't want to say prostitution.
• 18:41
  Speaker 5: But they wanted you to pay thirty five thousand dollars
• 18:45
  Speaker 5: for them to find you a man.
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: So there are several apps you guys that are like
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: that where you have to pay a lot of ship Yep,
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: you pay a membership in Mercedes. It's a lot of money. Like,
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: it's like a thousands of dollars. I don't want to
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: invest that much to go on seventeen for states.
• 19:00
  Speaker 3: Well, I figure if if. When she called me right
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: afterranking off the show, she said, you know, we saw
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: you on the show. We think you'd be great. Da
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: da da da da, And of course then asked me
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: to go and say, I'm somebody's island. Do you know
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: what I'm talking about? Some guys a date an island,
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: some famous Hollywood person and somebody knew who It wasn't like,
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: really you got invited to go to that. I was
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: like yeah, And by the way, that was thirty five
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: thousand dollars to go there as well. You know there's
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: a lot.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: No, yeah, those sound like pyramid schemes to me. What
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: I think the three of us need to get on board.
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: Richard Branson, That's what it was.
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well he's listened. He's a multimillionaire for a reason.
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: But what I think the three of us need to
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: start doing is we need to all send our emails
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: to iHeart and and maybe what needs to happen is
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: they need to do the next couple of podcasts in
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: twenty twenty six as a matchmaking service. Maybe we need
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: to have a matchmaker come on and set the three
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: of us up. And now that we have done you know,
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: the dates, maybe we should start exploring. Because I did
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: hear this in Bryce's interview as well. He was like,
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: it was kind of hard to date with eighty other
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: people around. Maybe we start exploring, you know, in our
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: next couple of episodes, more traditional dates. And I believe
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: our listeners would like that as well, a more traditional
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: situation where we actually get to know someone and see
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: if there's something there.
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: But maybe, you guys, we need.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: To talk to our producers as if they're not listening
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: right now, I have a match.
• 20:29
  Speaker 3: Ida you sound like a producer, But with that not
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: I mean, I'm.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: Really pulling for the three of us, okay, And maybe
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: we need a matchmaking service here.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: Can I just need to point out something. I never
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: got a concert date, but after watching yours concert date,
• 20:47
  Speaker 3: I'm going to take a hard pass on this.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: Listen, Kathy, you can you can learn from our mistake.
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: So okay, although I would say I think Mercedes went
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: really well, but but yeah, let's let's you know, concerts
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: are fun.
• 20:59
  Speaker 4: They're fun. Let's let's let's do this. Let's do this,
• 21:03
  Speaker 4: all right.
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: I will one more question I have for you. I'm
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: loaded with questions. That's another thing I asked any questions.
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: I'm going to try to stop that too, all right,
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: how do you plan to prioritize loving yourself in the
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: new year. I stay up late night thinking of these questions.
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: You're just your head.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: Look at her, Mercedes, if you need her head is
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: just out of control.
• 21:23
  Speaker 4: She's just spinning down the rabbit hole right now.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: I will answer first, if that's okay, I'm already practicing this.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: I have been practicing this for the last I don't
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: know eight plus months. Is prioritizing myself putting myself first,
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: and that goes across the board with everything. Because I
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: told you guys a lot what my prayer is when
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: I wake up in the morning, is like, you know,
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: thank you for my gifts. I've got a lot of them,
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: and I'm really, I'm really really grateful for everything that
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: I have and the way my life is going, in
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: the path that I'm going down. But truthfully, I want
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: to be a better woman. I want to be a
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: better now.
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: How do you plan to do that?
• 22:01
  Speaker 4: Though, I'm about to tell you Ken, oh.
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: Sorry, I thought you were saying just one.
• 22:05
  Speaker 4: I want to bet.
• 22:07
  Speaker 3: Six can't come soon or not.
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: We're almost there, Cathy, you just hold on tight. I
• 22:13
  Speaker 4: want to be a better woman.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: I want to be a better mom, and I want
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: to be a better partner some someday. Right those are like,
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: those are my top three priorities right now in myself.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: And so what I'm doing is I'm diving into myself
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: and that comes with self care, like waking up, making
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: sure I'm doing my prayer and my meditation. I have
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: to do that, you guys, to get myself right before
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: I can be present for anyone else. And then it's
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: really just feeding into myself and being really aware and
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: listening to my own intuition of what I need. And
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: some days I really want to go out and I
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: want to be social and I want to meet people,
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: and some days I want to lock myself in my
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: house and binge television and go to bed at seven
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: thirty at night. So I am truly just trying to
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: tap into my own intuition and understand what it is
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: that I need my soul's purpose for this upcoming year
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: and really really listen hard because I want to be
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: on that path, because y'all, that path has got to
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: be better than my own path for myself, and you
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: have seen me in the last year. That path has
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: got to be better than anything else that I have
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: experienced in twenty twenty five. And so I am trying
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: to sit with myself in the uncomfortable pieces and listen
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: to my own intuition and really be sure of those
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: decisions before I jump the gun.
• 23:28
  Speaker 4: On those things. And a lot of that looks like
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: just being alone.
• 23:32
  Speaker 5: I feel like for me, I feel like just taking, yeah,
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: taking care of myself and putting myself first and listening
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: to what I need. I feel like I'm a helper,
• 23:44
  Speaker 5: I'm a giver and I love, love, love that about myself,
• 23:47
  Speaker 5: but sometimes people take advantage of it. So again, like
• 23:51
  Speaker 5: with what I was saying earlier of me being like
• 23:53
  Speaker 5: this is me, take it if you will. Like, I
• 23:56
  Speaker 5: just want to be like so in the zone with
• 23:59
  Speaker 5: myself and know that we do have goals that we're
• 24:03
  Speaker 5: going to reach. But like I have to be I
• 24:06
  Speaker 5: have to put myself first, and sometimes that's hard for me.
• 24:08
  Speaker 5: But I think that once I figure out how to
• 24:11
  Speaker 5: do that, I'm going to be a lot happier.
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: You're so wise beyond your years. It's just a really beautiful.
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: Thing, Diana, because honestly, my answer is a combination of
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: both of you. I want to spend more time in
• 24:24
  Speaker 3: the morning praying, meditating, getting myself right before I get
• 24:28
  Speaker 3: up out of bed, but also listening. Uh what you said,
• 24:33
  Speaker 3: Merced is sort of listening to myself. And because I
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: also am a gimber, I'm also checking on my friends
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: all the time, trying to help and instead of sitting
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: back and being a little bit quiet with myself and saying,
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: you know, what do you need Kathy. So it really again,
• 24:48
  Speaker 3: this is proof that the three of us, regardless of
• 24:50
  Speaker 3: the age difference, we all have the similar challenges, similar goals.
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: I love here.
• 24:56
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, we're not putting on ourselves on the back
• 25:00
  Speaker 5: twenty six can know.
• 25:01
  Speaker 4: We are not.
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: No, we are not.
• 25:04
  Speaker 4: I love you, guys.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: I'm so glad we're doing this, and I'm really really
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: glad to be doing it with the both of you.
• 25:09
  Speaker 3: I second that second that.
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: Happy holidays you guys.
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: Happy happy Highs, Happy New Year, Happy Christmas, happy Kwanza,
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: whatever you're celebrating.
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: Here's to twenty twenty six.
• 25:21
  Speaker 5: Yes, it's gonna be a good year. I can feel
• 25:23
  Speaker 5: it's all going to find our.
• 25:25
  Speaker 3: Man fabulous here.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: If we don't find him, we'll find ourselves right exactly.
• 25:31
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 25:31
  Speaker 4: I love you guys.
• 25:32
  Speaker 3: Have a great day, you guys too.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: Thank you night Wow, ladies, thank you, thank you for
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: letting me be a part of this journey along with
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: all of you listeners. It's been a great fun getting
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: to know all of you on a deeper level and
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: seeing you not give up on love at any age.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: I'm hoping we make some love connections in the new
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: year for all of you. But until then, I've been
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: Ben