Latest / Real Crime with Adam Shand / Broken Trust: A Survivor’s Story | Fleur
Transcript
- 0:05Speaker 1: Appote production.
- 0:10Speaker 2: This podcast contains discussion of child sexual assault and psychological trauma.
- 0:15Speaker 2: It's not recommended for younger listeners, and discretion is advised.
- 0:23Speaker 2: Welcome to Real Crime with Adam Shand. I'm your host,
- 0:26Speaker 2: Adam Shand. There's an old saying that justice delayed is
- 0:29Speaker 2: justice denied. My guest today knows exactly how that feels,
- 0:33Speaker 2: and I'm hoping we can fix that. For three years,
- 0:37Speaker 2: from the age of eight to eleven, Fleur which is
- 0:39Speaker 2: not her real name, was sexually assaulted by her stepfather.
- 0:44Speaker 2: In those years, she suffered in silence as her mother's
- 0:47Speaker 2: husband exploited and defiled her. When she did speak up
- 0:51Speaker 2: in nineteen eighty five, police did next to nothing. The
- 0:55Speaker 2: perpetrator was interviewed but never charged. Fleur bravely told police
- 1:00Speaker 2: what her stepfather did to her in highly credible detail,
- 1:05Speaker 2: but in those days children are often not believed. Luckily,
- 1:09Speaker 2: times have changed remarkably. Fleur was placed in foster care
- 1:14Speaker 2: while her mother tried to save her marriage. Presumably as
- 1:18Speaker 2: I said, the perpetrator was never charged and for him
- 1:21Speaker 2: it all went away, but not for Flur. Forty years later,
- 1:26Speaker 2: Fleur is trying to have her assailant, now in his
- 1:28Speaker 2: mid eighties, brought to justice before he dies. I've located
- 1:33Speaker 2: this man living quietly in the suburbs of Melbourne, the Polisa,
- 1:36Speaker 2: where he is too but he still enjoys his freedom,
- 1:40Speaker 2: while Fleur continues to live the trauma of those days
- 1:43Speaker 2: that he caused. I'm proud to assist Fleur in her
- 1:47Speaker 2: quest for justice, and she's in the Real Crime Studio today.
- 1:50Speaker 2: Welcome Flur.
- 1:51Speaker 1: Thank you. It's quite an introduction. I've not heard it
- 1:56Speaker 1: put quite like that, so it's almost quite confronting.
- 2:01Speaker 2: Your whole story is confronting. And when you contacted me,
- 2:04Speaker 2: I knew this was story I had to pursue and
- 2:07Speaker 2: I should ask you why did you choose me?
- 2:11Speaker 1: Because, like I said, what I think i'd mentioned when
- 2:14Speaker 1: I first made contact that I'd seen some of your
- 2:17Speaker 1: work with TV shows and other podcasts, and so I thought, well,
- 2:22Speaker 1: you seem like someone who this has been your experience
- 2:25Speaker 1: and you would have knowledge specific to that very first
- 2:28Speaker 1: question that I asked you, which was in relation to,
- 2:32Speaker 1: you know, does publicity hinder or assist a criminal investigation?
- 2:37Speaker 1: As to whether that was going to be the right
- 2:39Speaker 1: path for me to take.
- 2:41Speaker 2: Well, I thank you for your trust and confidence in
- 2:43Speaker 2: me to do this, and I'm going to do my
- 2:44Speaker 2: very best. And we should say there has been a
- 2:47Speaker 2: report to police, Queensland Police about this where the offenses
- 2:51Speaker 2: took place, and you've not felt that there's been the
- 2:54Speaker 2: right urgency in this case because the perpetrator is now,
- 2:58Speaker 2: as I said in the intro, in his mid eighties,
- 3:00Speaker 2: and you fear he may die without facing up to
- 3:04Speaker 2: what he's done.
- 3:06Speaker 1: Correct, because this reissuing of a complaint to the police
- 3:11Speaker 1: was I think even pre COVID, And so that's how
- 3:14Speaker 1: long I've been sitting waiting for something to happen. And
- 3:18Speaker 1: as much as there has been bits and pieces and
- 3:21Speaker 1: the police have you know, have done some background work,
- 3:25Speaker 1: you know, trying to track down people from that time
- 3:28Speaker 1: to see what they could offer as a witness, but
- 3:31Speaker 1: it's been at a snail's pace, and you know, I've
- 3:35Speaker 1: been simply told that you know, other cases that are
- 3:38Speaker 1: happening now have been taking priority and so I kind
- 3:43Speaker 1: of always then shoved back to the bottom of the queue.
- 3:47Speaker 2: So how do you feel about that this case when
- 3:49Speaker 2: you know the perpetrator is elderly, he could die any time,
- 3:53Speaker 2: and any chance of your resolving this, there's been the
- 3:56Speaker 2: big issue in your life. Any chance of resolving it
- 3:58Speaker 2: will be gone.
- 4:01Speaker 1: It's frightening, you know, as much as I understand that
- 4:04Speaker 1: if there are cases happening now, of course you know
- 4:06Speaker 1: they need attention. However, and I've said this to the
- 4:10Speaker 1: police officer recently, is you can't keep pushing my case
- 4:14Speaker 1: to the bottom because there is the very real threat
- 4:17Speaker 1: of simply dying from old age, regardless of you know,
- 4:20Speaker 1: any other causes of death, and then you know, everything
- 4:24Speaker 1: completely falls apart, you know, the second that occurs. But
- 4:29Speaker 1: of course, you know, I don't know how much I
- 4:31Speaker 1: can push the issue, you know, without getting pushed back,
- 4:35Speaker 1: you know, or being told that there's staffing limitations, funding limitations,
- 4:41Speaker 1: all of this that. You know. I'm sure they do battle,
- 4:44Speaker 1: but there's got to be a point where mine does
- 4:48Speaker 1: take some priority.
- 4:51Speaker 2: Well, it's about you having your voice and telling your story,
- 4:56Speaker 2: and I guess impressing on the police that time is
- 4:58Speaker 2: of the essence. And I think I get contacted quite
- 5:01Speaker 2: a lot by people with these historical sexual assault cases,
- 5:05Speaker 2: and they're very difficult because usually there's no evidence. There's
- 5:09Speaker 2: one story from a long time ago. There's no contemporary notes,
- 5:13Speaker 2: there's no file, and it's extremely difficult for police picking
- 5:18Speaker 2: up the trail to do anything at the distance of time.
- 5:20Speaker 2: The difference with your case is you have quite a
- 5:24Speaker 2: bit of material. You've got a record of interview that
- 5:27Speaker 2: was done with the perpetrator back in nineteen eighty five.
- 5:31Speaker 2: You've got some handwritten notes I presume by a detective
- 5:34Speaker 2: back in the day transcribing your experience. You've also got
- 5:39Speaker 2: a magazine that was I guess part of the evidence
- 5:43Speaker 2: back in the day, a pornographic magazine. You've got what
- 5:46Speaker 2: happened to you as well. You were put in foster care.
- 5:49Speaker 2: So tell us how did that material come to light?
- 5:53Speaker 2: Because from what I understand your mother and I don't
- 5:57Speaker 2: want to criticize her, because this is a problem that
- 6:00Speaker 2: so many people are faced over the years in marriages
- 6:04Speaker 2: where this has taken place, and really this sort of abuse.
- 6:07Speaker 2: One of my friends down here next sexual assault squad
- 6:10Speaker 2: detective said, this is the last taboo where it's ancestor
- 6:14Speaker 2: or its stepfathers and so forth. Very difficult cases. But
- 6:18Speaker 2: your mother had a certain way of dealing with it
- 6:20Speaker 2: back in the day.
- 6:21Speaker 1: What did she do seemingly lifted the carpet and swept
- 6:24Speaker 1: it under. It was not to be discussed. Essentially, that's
- 6:29Speaker 1: when the lies started, so, you know, lying about why
- 6:34Speaker 1: he wasn't you know, why they weren't together anymore. And
- 6:38Speaker 1: that was a lie that I also had to go
- 6:41Speaker 1: along with. I wasn't to talk to her about what happened,
- 6:46Speaker 1: wasn't allowed to talk to anyone else what happened. And
- 6:50Speaker 1: that's just sort of the way it became. And of course,
- 6:53Speaker 1: unfortunately of the age that I was and not really
- 6:57Speaker 1: able to I guess, articulate the situation well enough to
- 7:03Speaker 1: speak out or to you know, jump up and down
- 7:07Speaker 1: and complain. I guess it was just still reeling from
- 7:13Speaker 1: everything that happened, and you just sort of, I suppose,
- 7:16Speaker 1: accept that this is what you have to do, not
- 7:18Speaker 1: realizing that it's not actually you know, and of course
- 7:22Speaker 1: a lie ends up evolving into other areas of life.
- 7:28Speaker 1: I ended up having a lot of struggles with weight
- 7:32Speaker 1: because I ended up being a comfort eater. I struggled
- 7:35Speaker 1: through school, and of course, you know, if anyone ever
- 7:39Speaker 1: probably questioned my mother about these things, it was never
- 7:43Speaker 1: actually related to you know, the fact that I've gone
- 7:45Speaker 1: through a significant trauma, you know, that would have been
- 7:49Speaker 1: kept quiet, and who knows what she told people about
- 7:54Speaker 1: those scenarios, but it certainly wouldn't have been the truth.
- 7:58Speaker 2: And it certainly would have affected your relationship with your mother,
- 8:01Speaker 2: because when I read the material and I speak to
- 8:03Speaker 2: you over the last few weeks, as we've discussing this,
- 8:06Speaker 2: this term victim blaming comes to mind. That you were
- 8:11Speaker 2: made to feel that you were the one to blame,
- 8:14Speaker 2: that somehow the troubles going on were at your door,
- 8:19Speaker 2: rather than the perpetrator who had just abused your trust
- 8:23Speaker 2: in a horrific way.
- 8:25Speaker 1: Well, I certainly can look back and feel a sense
- 8:30Speaker 1: that she thought I'd made it up, which was part
- 8:33Speaker 1: of then her wanting to pretend it never happened, because
- 8:38Speaker 1: no doubt if she did say anything to him, or
- 8:41Speaker 1: even if she did read that police interview and saw
- 8:46Speaker 1: him denying everything, that she would have taken that as, oh,
- 8:49Speaker 1: he didn't do anything, and therefore I have made this up.
- 8:53Speaker 1: And you know, those thought presses don't happen in isolation.
- 8:57Speaker 1: They then permeate into all your other thought process and
- 9:01Speaker 1: so of course, if you think I've lied and made
- 9:02Speaker 1: the whole thing up. Well, then you're not dive in
- 9:06Speaker 1: wanting to make sure I'm okay, get help and support
- 9:10Speaker 1: for me, guidance, nothing because you think I've lied.
- 9:17Speaker 2: And so nothing was said for years about this and
- 9:21Speaker 2: you were made to feel like you'd made it up.
- 9:24Speaker 2: Were there times when you even doubted yourself that maybe
- 9:28Speaker 2: this didn't happen, Maybe maybe I'm wrong.
- 9:33Speaker 1: I don't think I ever felt that I got it
- 9:36Speaker 1: wrong and it never happened. I think it was more
- 9:38Speaker 1: that weird and this is a weird perspective to have,
- 9:42Speaker 1: but almost it was wrong for me to have said something,
- 9:47Speaker 1: and that it almost wasn't wrong for him to have
- 9:50Speaker 1: been doing that. Like in as bizarre as that sounds,
- 9:54Speaker 1: it was sort of rather than me going, oh, maybe
- 9:58Speaker 1: it didn't actually happen, like no, I certainly do not
- 10:01Speaker 1: hype doubt that it happened, But it was that aspect
- 10:06Speaker 1: of maybe I was wrong to say something, or like
- 10:09Speaker 1: I said, maybe maybe what he was doing wasn't considered wrong.
- 10:13Speaker 1: You know, I was quite an isolated child, you know,
- 10:17Speaker 1: maybe thinking well, maybe this happens in other households. Because
- 10:21Speaker 1: I also, as much as I don't recall exactly what
- 10:24Speaker 1: it was that I said to the teacher at school.
- 10:29Speaker 1: Something about it tells me it wasn't a disclosure in
- 10:33Speaker 1: the way of, you know, being upset and all this
- 10:36Speaker 1: is happening. My gut tells me I must have just
- 10:40Speaker 1: said some offhand comment, but it was enough to prick
- 10:44Speaker 1: their ears up and go, oh, hang on a minute,
- 10:47Speaker 1: that doesn't sound right. And I think that played into
- 10:51Speaker 1: my having no concept that what was happening was wrong
- 10:56Speaker 1: and was not supposed to happen. So I think that's
- 11:00Speaker 1: sort of where it left me that I was I
- 11:02Speaker 1: was wrong to say something.
- 11:05Speaker 2: Let's take a step back, because you said something to
- 11:08Speaker 2: your mother first.
- 11:11Speaker 1: I'm not sure. Unfortunately, this is part of where my
- 11:16Speaker 1: memory fails me. I have faint memory of saying something
- 11:21Speaker 1: to her, and I know that is backed up in
- 11:24Speaker 1: that sort of handwritten statement because it has then stated
- 11:28Speaker 1: there that my mother's response was that sort of she
- 11:31Speaker 1: will talk to him about it. But whether that came
- 11:35Speaker 1: before or after I mentioned at the school. Therefore, as
- 11:38Speaker 1: in was I prompted to say something to my mum?
- 11:42Speaker 2: I couldn't tell you because I was shocked by that
- 11:45Speaker 2: when I read that statement and it said you spoke
- 11:47Speaker 2: to your mother, and she said she'd go and talk
- 11:50Speaker 2: to the perpetrator. And I can't help but feel that
- 11:54Speaker 2: the proper response would have been, I'll go and talk
- 11:57Speaker 2: to the police. I'll get something done about this. I've
- 11:59Speaker 2: got to protect you. And I wonder whether and this
- 12:03Speaker 2: may be unraveled, because I think if police get active
- 12:06Speaker 2: in this case, they can find teachers and other classmates
- 12:09Speaker 2: of that era. It's not impossible, and they maybe able
- 12:12Speaker 2: to unravel it. But certainly it seems like you weren't
- 12:14Speaker 2: believed and you were now the problem. And then it's
- 12:19Speaker 2: something that you've also I think blocked out in your memory,
- 12:23Speaker 2: was you were put in foster care. I can only
- 12:25Speaker 2: imagine you're an eleven year old girl who's been abused
- 12:29Speaker 2: and suddenly you're no longer in your family home, the
- 12:32Speaker 2: perpetrator is in the family home, and you were in
- 12:35Speaker 2: foster care for some period of time.
- 12:38Speaker 1: Yes, again, very very much snapshot memories, and really all
- 12:45Speaker 1: I remember is I'd gone through two different homes. I
- 12:49Speaker 1: have no idea why the change occurred. Could be nothing
- 12:53Speaker 1: to do with me, could be other reasons to do
- 12:56Speaker 1: with the that sual home setups that I always needed
- 13:01Speaker 1: to be moved. But I just have very snapshot memory
- 13:05Speaker 1: of the first and very snapshot is in a vague
- 13:09Speaker 1: memory of what the first family looked like and what
- 13:12Speaker 1: the second family looked like, but probably not enough that
- 13:15Speaker 1: I could, you know, ever point them out in you know,
- 13:17Speaker 1: if you gave me a line up of photos, I
- 13:19Speaker 1: probably couldn't point them out. And I certainly couldn't tell
- 13:22Speaker 1: anywhere like location. I couldn't tell you if they drove
- 13:26Speaker 1: me for ten minutes to get to the house or
- 13:28Speaker 1: for an hour to get to I absolutely have no
- 13:31Speaker 1: memory at all. I just remember being told to pack
- 13:34Speaker 1: some clothes and then I was out, and then yeah,
- 13:39Speaker 1: and even the length of time I was gone, like,
- 13:41Speaker 1: you know, i'd only know that by looking at the
- 13:44Speaker 1: Social services file that I eventually was sent to even
- 13:49Speaker 1: have a gauge of how long I'd been gone for.
- 13:53Speaker 2: And there's one moment in the record which says you
- 13:57Speaker 2: absconded for a period of days, location unknown. Did you
- 14:03Speaker 2: run away or something?
- 14:05Speaker 1: Yeah, So that was a bit of a turning point,
- 14:10Speaker 1: which didn't I didn't set out to achieve this outcome,
- 14:14Speaker 1: but I unfortunately it could have made a difference. And
- 14:19Speaker 1: I don't think really actually did so when I was
- 14:22Speaker 1: about I think I was about fifteen. I'd been out
- 14:25Speaker 1: with a boyfriend at the time, and again still in
- 14:30Speaker 1: all the midst of you know, struggles of school and
- 14:35Speaker 1: home and life, and you know, you're putting a lot
- 14:38Speaker 1: of teenaged anks into all this as well, and it
- 14:41Speaker 1: was I just remember the time, it wasn't so much
- 14:45Speaker 1: sort of conscious you know, I'm going to run away
- 14:48Speaker 1: or I'm going to disappear. It was just more I
- 14:51Speaker 1: just don't feel like going home tonight, And that was
- 14:53Speaker 1: really no more thought than that. And next thing, I
- 14:59Speaker 1: don't know if it was the next day that the
- 15:03Speaker 1: boyfriend's parent and I couldn't actually tell now where I
- 15:06Speaker 1: was for that period of time, wouldn't have a cloe,
- 15:09Speaker 1: But I don't know if my mother had managed to
- 15:13Speaker 1: get hold of the boyfriend's parents, who got hold of
- 15:16Speaker 1: him to say the police are involved, you know, like
- 15:19Speaker 1: where am I kind of thing, and then sort of
- 15:22Speaker 1: you know, that wasn't my attention, So of course I've
- 15:25Speaker 1: made contact to say like, you know, well, you know,
- 15:27Speaker 1: what are you doing? But they were actually getting ready.
- 15:30Speaker 1: They'd gone around to my mother's house. They'd taken a
- 15:33Speaker 1: photo of me because they were getting ready to essentially
- 15:37Speaker 1: put me on the like six o'clock news that evening
- 15:40Speaker 1: in regards to being, you know, a missing teenager and anyway,
- 15:46Speaker 1: because at the time of that going to occur, and
- 15:50Speaker 1: you know, my mother then realizing that she's probably going
- 15:54Speaker 1: to have to do some fast explaining why my face
- 15:57Speaker 1: is on the news, she rang family, rang my father
- 16:03Speaker 1: because my father was not aware of any of this
- 16:05Speaker 1: that had happened to me. I don't know what she
- 16:08Speaker 1: told her side of the family, because none of them
- 16:12Speaker 1: have ever spoken to me. It's just been, I suppose,
- 16:16Speaker 1: this continuation of this wall of silence. So I don't
- 16:18Speaker 1: even know if she was honest with them about why
- 16:22Speaker 1: I may have just not come home. But she apparently
- 16:26Speaker 1: did tell my father, and it was a bit of
- 16:31Speaker 1: a heated conversation that went on. I couldn't tell you
- 16:35Speaker 1: abatim as to what was said. There was a lot
- 16:38Speaker 1: of it I wouldn't have heard because I wasn't right
- 16:41Speaker 1: there present. But one very distinctive thing that my father
- 16:45Speaker 1: said to me after that meeting was, of course, you know,
- 16:49Speaker 1: one of his first questions was why wasn't he told
- 16:52Speaker 1: at the time, and that the staggering response that my
- 16:56Speaker 1: mother gave to that question was she didn't think it
- 16:59Speaker 1: was important, and I don't. I still don't even know
- 17:07Speaker 1: how you how to process that answer. I didn't think
- 17:12Speaker 1: it was important.
- 17:15Speaker 2: I can't either. I can't process that either. And the
- 17:17Speaker 2: remarkable thing about all this is that despite the fact
- 17:20Speaker 2: your mother swept us under the carpet, didn't tell people,
- 17:22Speaker 2: left you in a place of isolation and silence. She
- 17:26Speaker 2: kept the documents, kept the record of interview of the perpetrator,
- 17:31Speaker 2: kept your foster record, kept the statement, even kept a
- 17:35Speaker 2: magazine that was one of the exhibits in the house.
- 17:38Speaker 2: How did you find that material?
- 17:41Speaker 1: So se fast forward to late twenty sixteen, and unfortunate
- 17:48Speaker 1: circumstances required that my two children and myself needed to
- 17:54Speaker 1: move into her place, and in amongst discovering that you know,
- 17:59Speaker 1: clearly her health has declined, and part of declining that
- 18:07Speaker 1: you know, I've noticed for a while. But you know,
- 18:09Speaker 1: there are some things that you don't really hit you
- 18:11Speaker 1: in the face until you're sort of living, you know,
- 18:14Speaker 1: with someone. But obviously I could already see when we
- 18:17Speaker 1: would just visit that, you know, the hoarding that was
- 18:20Speaker 1: taking place, and you know the amount of times I'd
- 18:22Speaker 1: go there and spend my visits, you know, trying to
- 18:25Speaker 1: throw things out just what they've been going on, and
- 18:29Speaker 1: trying to, you know, continue to clean out. And so
- 18:33Speaker 1: this was in the built in wardrobe in her bedroom,
- 18:37Speaker 1: and it was just chocol block with stuff that I'm
- 18:40Speaker 1: sure she didn't even know what was in there herself,
- 18:43Speaker 1: and just pulling things out. And yet it's really quite
- 18:47Speaker 1: shocked as to this paperwork that had come about, and
- 18:51Speaker 1: paperwork that I didn't actually know existed, let alone that
- 18:54Speaker 1: she had it. And it was this. The best way
- 18:58Speaker 1: I can describe it is a penny drop moment where
- 19:03Speaker 1: things just all into place, I suppose it's the best
- 19:07Speaker 1: way to describe it. But also a feeling of my god,
- 19:11Speaker 1: what an idiot I have been all this time because
- 19:16Speaker 1: I just didn't realize And you feel stupid saying this,
- 19:22Speaker 1: but I didn't realize she didn't believe me that that
- 19:26Speaker 1: was what the penny drop was. It was like, oh,
- 19:29Speaker 1: my God, realize it, because you know, even though I
- 19:33Speaker 1: couldn't articulate it at the time as a child, and
- 19:36Speaker 1: then sort of growing up, I knew something was something
- 19:39Speaker 1: didn't sit right, and something had changed in whatever our
- 19:42Speaker 1: relationship was before this occurred, it wasn't the same after.
- 19:46Speaker 1: But I couldn't, you know, articulate that at the time.
- 19:50Speaker 1: But I knew I would see other families and I,
- 19:53Speaker 1: you know, and people are different, so you know, you've
- 19:55Speaker 1: got to be careful making comparisons. But I would just
- 19:57Speaker 1: see other families and how they would interact with each other,
- 20:02Speaker 1: and I could just see something was different the relationship,
- 20:08Speaker 1: the interaction, whatever you want to call it between my
- 20:11Speaker 1: mother and I. There was something different about it. That
- 20:15Speaker 1: was a penny drop moment. And that's when it fell
- 20:17Speaker 1: into place that I realized, my god, that's what it was.
- 20:20Speaker 1: This I suppose almost arm's length distance between us that
- 20:26Speaker 1: I carried thinking I was the cause of the issue
- 20:30Speaker 1: between her and I that I couldn't articulate, like, but
- 20:34Speaker 1: but it was my fault. So then suddenly realizing no,
- 20:38Speaker 1: it wasn't my fault. And so with that then as
- 20:43Speaker 1: well realizing that, you know what, I never actually was
- 20:46Speaker 1: told what happened with the outcome. I think I assumed
- 20:50Speaker 1: that because I knew the police were involved, that they
- 20:53Speaker 1: would have done their investigation and there would have been
- 20:55Speaker 1: a court case. But I was never told, but of course,
- 21:00Speaker 1: you know, nothing was spoken about. So I thought, well,
- 21:03Speaker 1: you know, I want to find out myself what happened
- 21:07Speaker 1: with this case. And so I started off with them
- 21:10Speaker 1: an FOI to QPS, and they came back with sort
- 21:17Speaker 1: of essentially like a hands up as, so, oh, we
- 21:20Speaker 1: don't know, we don't have anything. And so I was like,
- 21:24Speaker 1: what do you mean you don't have anything? I have stuff?
- 21:27Speaker 1: How do you not have stuff? How do I have
- 21:30Speaker 1: a police record of interview and you don't. That makes
- 21:35Speaker 1: no sense. And to go back on to the earlier
- 21:37Speaker 1: point about my fears about you know, this case being delayed,
- 21:42Speaker 1: like I don't know, to bring out a conspiracy theory,
- 21:46Speaker 1: you know, I sometimes wonder whether they're avoiding the topic
- 21:49Speaker 1: because maybe they recognize the stuff up that happened back then,
- 21:53Speaker 1: and so they're trying to avoid recognizing that because obviously
- 21:59Speaker 1: the best chance of conviction was at the time it
- 22:03Speaker 1: will be much more difficult now. But anyway, so from that,
- 22:06Speaker 1: you know, I was advised, well, if the police didn't investigate,
- 22:10Speaker 1: then then I can lodge a complaint now and initiate
- 22:16Speaker 1: an investigation. So that's what I did. Then after I
- 22:21Speaker 1: think sort of a year or two. So this was
- 22:24Speaker 1: about twenty seventeen, twenty eighteen when all of this then started,
- 22:29Speaker 1: and the first officer we started with the case. About
- 22:33Speaker 1: a year or so later, I found out that they'd
- 22:37Speaker 1: closed it and I'm like, what, no one notified me.
- 22:41Speaker 1: It was only because I was trying to chase it
- 22:43Speaker 1: up as to what was happening, because I hadn't heard anything,
- 22:45Speaker 1: and they're like, oh, yeah, the case was closed, And
- 22:47Speaker 1: they came back with this samement saying, oh, clearly it
- 22:50Speaker 1: was investigated thoroughly the first time round. And I'm like, oh, really,
- 22:54Speaker 1: really can you can you show me the evidence that
- 22:56Speaker 1: it was clearly investigated the first time round, And so
- 22:59Speaker 1: I lodged a complaint and so it was reopened now
- 23:03Speaker 1: with the current office. So but we're still talking. We'll
- 23:08Speaker 1: probably you know, four or five years now that you
- 23:11Speaker 1: know this, since it's been reopened then the second time,
- 23:16Speaker 1: which I don't know how long these things normally take,
- 23:18Speaker 1: but that just seems a rather long period of time.
- 23:22Speaker 2: It is, and I think it's your frustration is absolutely justified.
- 23:26Speaker 2: And look at the material. It is comprehensive. You know
- 23:29Speaker 2: exactly what the allegations are when they took place, for
- 23:31Speaker 2: how long your response what happened? Of course, eventually the
- 23:35Speaker 2: perpetrator and your mother did break up, but she kept
- 23:39Speaker 2: his name until the early two thousands, I believe, so
- 23:41Speaker 2: she still continued to cling to the remnants of that relationship.
- 23:45Speaker 2: But what's lacking in the evidence that I've seen is
- 23:48Speaker 2: your mother's statement. I wonder did she make a statement,
- 23:51Speaker 2: because that would have been key. Whatever conversations that she'd
- 23:55Speaker 2: had with the perpetrator would have been used in evidence
- 23:58Speaker 2: to corroborate what you were saying. And I wonder whether
- 24:02Speaker 2: you were just left high and dry in a situation
- 24:05Speaker 2: where it was just he said she said, he was
- 24:08Speaker 2: able to sit there and deny it all and there
- 24:10Speaker 2: was nothing coming up behind to corroborate that.
- 24:15Speaker 1: Exactly. And that's the issue with the fact that whatever
- 24:18Speaker 1: file they had is gone. So I couldn't tell you
- 24:22Speaker 1: whether the record of interview that they did with the
- 24:24Speaker 1: perpetrator is that the only interview they did, or did
- 24:27Speaker 1: they speak to other people? If they did, where are
- 24:29Speaker 1: those records of interview. There's not even a log of
- 24:34Speaker 1: you know expect that they normally have of you know,
- 24:37Speaker 1: dates and times that you know they and who they've
- 24:39Speaker 1: spoken to and when they spoke to them, or who
- 24:42Speaker 1: they're you know, wanting to speak to, like who were
- 24:45Speaker 1: persons of interest if that was necessary for the case,
- 24:49Speaker 1: or But there's just like I said, they had, the
- 24:52Speaker 1: only document they had was this handwritten statement, and they
- 24:58Speaker 1: turned around to me and said, we don't know what
- 25:00Speaker 1: this is. We don't like you know, we don't know
- 25:02Speaker 1: where this has come from. But that's all they had.
- 25:06Speaker 2: It's unsigned, it doesn't give away much of its providence,
- 25:09Speaker 2: but the allegations are very clear, and it seems to
- 25:12Speaker 2: be what is put to the perpetrator in his interview.
- 25:15Speaker 2: It's drawn from this document. Seems very clear, and I
- 25:19Speaker 2: don't want to go into the detail because it is harrowing,
- 25:21Speaker 2: and I really appreciate you talking about this at all.
- 25:24Speaker 2: But what we see is over a period of three years,
- 25:28Speaker 2: a grooming sexual assault that stopped short of actual penetration
- 25:34Speaker 2: fucking use that word, but something that was clearly very
- 25:38Speaker 2: damaging to you and to not be believed. But I
- 25:42Speaker 2: think also to find the evidence in the cupboard, i'd
- 25:45Speaker 2: suggest going back to the cupboard again and see if
- 25:47Speaker 2: there's any more in there. You know that may be
- 25:49Speaker 2: useful to the police. Have you done that.
- 25:53Speaker 1: Or actually no longer in that house, But there's potential
- 25:57Speaker 1: that other documents exist because of the sheer hoarding that
- 26:01Speaker 1: my mother did. That I'm still drowning in, you know
- 26:05Speaker 1: a lot of stuff. You know, I just ran out
- 26:07Speaker 1: of time to sort through things. Things just had to
- 26:10Speaker 1: be boxed up and whatnot and just moved. And so
- 26:13Speaker 1: there's still boxes and crates and filing cabinets full of paperwork.
- 26:17Speaker 1: And one day I might be able to sit down
- 26:19Speaker 1: and go through it and you know, magically come across
- 26:22Speaker 1: something else. But just to point out there it there
- 26:29Speaker 1: was penetration. He did use his fingers, and he had
- 26:38Speaker 1: made a start with his penis. He just hadn't fully
- 26:42Speaker 1: inserted it, but he had inserted essentially, like I suppose
- 26:46Speaker 1: you could say, the head of the penis, and that's
- 26:52Speaker 1: the thing that's part of the groomy. I think he
- 26:54Speaker 1: was slowly working up to where he would have the
- 26:57Speaker 1: day would have come where he would be fully inserting it.
- 27:01Speaker 1: But obviously, you know, having said something, you know, interjected
- 27:06Speaker 1: any further acts from occurring. But absolutely I have no
- 27:11Speaker 1: doubt that if if I hadn't happened to have said
- 27:14Speaker 1: something that these acts would have just continued and potentially
- 27:18Speaker 1: continued for.
- 27:18Speaker 2: Years, which they did for three long years.
- 27:22Speaker 1: Well they already had which yeah, which is why this
- 27:26Speaker 1: wasn't you know, some random you know, active you know,
- 27:32Speaker 1: chrome of opportunity as they say that, you know, it
- 27:34Speaker 1: was the stranger who had to catch me walking down
- 27:37Speaker 1: the street, grab pulled me into the bushes, did what
- 27:40Speaker 1: they did, and then took off and never seen again.
- 27:42Speaker 1: And I'm not making light of those I'm just saying
- 27:45Speaker 1: just bringing up the difference between someone who's got unfettered
- 27:50Speaker 1: access to in the four walls of the home with
- 27:54Speaker 1: potentially a fairly ignorant parent because as mentioned, you know,
- 28:01Speaker 1: was she completely in the dark about these acts occurring?
- 28:05Speaker 1: Did she know and did she turn a blind eye?
- 28:08Speaker 1: Or at the very least should she have known, should
- 28:11Speaker 1: she have been suspicious and still decided to Oh, we
- 28:16Speaker 1: don't talk about those sort of things, you know, that
- 28:19Speaker 1: sort of era and mindset that that carried through as
- 28:24Speaker 1: to you know, why she made up other reasons as
- 28:28Speaker 1: to why the marriage broke down because you know, she
- 28:33Speaker 1: couldn't possibly face telling people the.
- 28:36Speaker 2: Truth for fear of being judged, I guess.
- 28:41Speaker 1: I I don't know, and on course, you know, I'm
- 28:45Speaker 1: never going to get an answer from her anymore. But
- 28:49Speaker 1: that lie is so ingrained in her that even a
- 28:53Speaker 1: few years ago, during an assessment with a medical specialist
- 28:58Speaker 1: you know who just you know, was asking about background,
- 29:00Speaker 1: social history, you know, family background, and asked about you know,
- 29:05Speaker 1: general questions. You know, how many times you've been married,
- 29:07Speaker 1: you know, invariably you know, why did the marriages ended?
- 29:10Speaker 1: And listening to her give reason as to why the
- 29:15Speaker 1: second marriage ended, and I just was just flabbercusted that this.
- 29:22Speaker 1: I think the lie is so ingrained that she completely
- 29:25Speaker 1: believes it.
- 29:26Speaker 2: I should say that your mother is still alive, but
- 29:28Speaker 2: she's suffering dementia, so she's beyond any chance to get
- 29:33Speaker 2: definitive assistance again. But as I read the record of interview,
- 29:38Speaker 2: the perpetrator is able, over an hour or so interview
- 29:41Speaker 2: to deny everything except for one thing. He does admit
- 29:46Speaker 2: that he showed you a pornographic magazine and as if
- 29:50Speaker 2: that you were interested in it.
- 29:52Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the excuse he gives when they ask him
- 29:54Speaker 1: why he showed it to me, and his answer was
- 29:57Speaker 1: because she wanted to see it, which just astounds me
- 30:01Speaker 1: that it just seemed to be accepted as an answer
- 30:05Speaker 1: by the police as well, and not only that, And
- 30:07Speaker 1: this is what leads me to you know, I have
- 30:10Speaker 1: a few reasons as to why I believe I could
- 30:13Speaker 1: not be his first and only victim, but one of
- 30:17Speaker 1: them is because I, you know, also since tried to
- 30:20Speaker 1: lodge a complaint in regards to their inaction on that admission.
- 30:26Speaker 1: And of course it's come back to me telling me
- 30:29Speaker 1: that that wasn't an offense at that time, which you know,
- 30:34Speaker 1: is frustrating, but of course you know, of course, what
- 30:36Speaker 1: can you do about it? But it still says to
- 30:40Speaker 1: me that he seemed to know that. Otherwise, why would
- 30:45Speaker 1: he admit to that unless he knew that they couldn't
- 30:49Speaker 1: do anything about that, And that in itself should be
- 30:54Speaker 1: highly suspicious that this is someone who knows the system.
- 30:58Speaker 1: And even if he hasn't had that accusation landed to
- 31:01Speaker 1: him before. I mean, I've listened and you know, to
- 31:06Speaker 1: enough documentaries on this topic to know that there's a
- 31:10Speaker 1: society of them. They know who each other is, they
- 31:14Speaker 1: interact with each other and pass tips on. And I
- 31:19Speaker 1: think that you know, he's found out from others that
- 31:23Speaker 1: they can't do you for that, because how else would
- 31:26Speaker 1: you know, Why would you admit to that, why would
- 31:28Speaker 1: you say no to everything except that unless you knew
- 31:33Speaker 1: they couldn't do anything about that?
- 31:35Speaker 2: Because you covered this in that handwritten statement. What did
- 31:39Speaker 2: you say was the purpose of showing you that magazine?
- 31:43Speaker 1: So my memory, apart from whatever I've said in there,
- 31:47Speaker 1: just separate to that, my own memories of those magazines,
- 31:50Speaker 1: was his showing me. And I think, you know, obviously
- 31:52Speaker 1: I didn't know these magazines existed, and so it would
- 31:56Speaker 1: have started by him showing me and wanting me to
- 32:00Speaker 1: look through it and start to pick out what I'd
- 32:04Speaker 1: like to try. Essentially as disgusting.
- 32:07Speaker 2: As that is as an eleven year old, this is
- 32:10Speaker 2: a forty three year old man.
- 32:12Speaker 1: This was I was younger, because this is happening over
- 32:15Speaker 1: that three year period. So this wasn't just right at
- 32:17Speaker 1: the end, So I could have been It could have
- 32:20Speaker 1: started when I was eight and praying on the fact
- 32:24Speaker 1: that I have no idea that any of this is
- 32:27Speaker 1: inappropriate or wrong, and just going on thinking, obviously thinking
- 32:31Speaker 1: it's some sort of game or like whatever. He had
- 32:35Speaker 1: managed to convince me of had worked, and yes, so
- 32:39Speaker 1: wanting me to pick out things to try. And there
- 32:44Speaker 1: probably was a time where I had said to you know,
- 32:49Speaker 1: I'd asked him, you know, to get the book to
- 32:51Speaker 1: look through it, because is what this is what the
- 32:53Speaker 1: grooming was, this is what he had been, you know,
- 32:56Speaker 1: getting me to do. And so I was just you know,
- 32:59Speaker 1: being you know, the good child and you know, thinking
- 33:02Speaker 1: I'm doing what what to expect it of me? Which,
- 33:07Speaker 1: you know, it's just horrifying to think that that's that's
- 33:10Speaker 1: where you were.
- 33:12Speaker 2: You've been brainwashed by this individual. And when in the
- 33:16Speaker 2: interview he was asked, okay, you say this didn't happen.
- 33:21Speaker 2: Why do you think Fleur is saying this, he said, well,
- 33:24Speaker 2: I think it's because I make her do the right thing,
- 33:28Speaker 2: falling back on his authority as a father figure. It's monstrous.
- 33:33Speaker 1: Yeah, it's hard to comment on actually, because we talked
- 33:40Speaker 1: about this off air.
- 33:41Speaker 2: The effect that it's had on you and your your childhood,
- 33:45Speaker 2: these important formative years where you are you're into puberty
- 33:50Speaker 2: or forming your views about sexuality, and you have this
- 33:54Speaker 2: monster who's exploiting you at these critical moments. What effect,
- 34:02Speaker 2: how do you think it has had on you and
- 34:03Speaker 2: the way you've formed if you're the world and your sexuality.
- 34:08Speaker 1: Oh look, it's probably even affected me more than what
- 34:12Speaker 1: I realized. It's affected me, but it sets you on
- 34:15Speaker 1: this trajectory, and the one for me just seemed to
- 34:20Speaker 1: be trauma after trauma. There were in comparison, albeit more minor,
- 34:28Speaker 1: but there were other occasions of an assault. You know,
- 34:33Speaker 1: I was assaulted in a cinema and I froze at
- 34:39Speaker 1: the time when it happened, and I mentioned it. I
- 34:44Speaker 1: remember mentioning it to my friend who had gone to
- 34:47Speaker 1: the cinema with After the cinema, and I also remember,
- 34:50Speaker 1: and I don't mean this to be derogatory to my friend,
- 34:53Speaker 1: but I remember it was sort of turned into a
- 34:54Speaker 1: bit of a joke and it was being laughed about,
- 34:59Speaker 1: and I probably participated in the joke, but inside, you know,
- 35:03Speaker 1: you feel this sort of discomforts like and of course
- 35:05Speaker 1: looking back and go why was this being joked about.
- 35:09Speaker 1: There was a family friend of my father's who you know,
- 35:16Speaker 1: he was grooming me towards something and again he so
- 35:23Speaker 1: that started off. He was someone of European descent, and
- 35:28Speaker 1: you know how sometimes they're very I don't know how
- 35:32Speaker 1: to describe it. They're very family orientated, that big families,
- 35:36Speaker 1: you know, they're all kind of you know, giving each other.
- 35:38Speaker 1: You know, you get the double kiss, you know, on
- 35:40Speaker 1: your cheeks, you get the big hugs. And so when
- 35:43Speaker 1: it starts off like that, you put it down to
- 35:47Speaker 1: that's just their culture, that's just the way they are.
- 35:49Speaker 1: But of course it started to slowly mold a bit
- 35:52Speaker 1: more than that, and initially I would just right off, guy, No,
- 35:56Speaker 1: I'm just you know, being silly. It's not that at all,
- 35:59Speaker 1: until there was one incident where it was much more
- 36:03Speaker 1: obvious that, no, this is not just their cultureal you know,
- 36:08Speaker 1: giving everyone hugs. This was this is actually, you know,
- 36:12Speaker 1: more more.
- 36:13Speaker 2: Of an assault, raping you and so forth.
- 36:16Speaker 1: Essentially, yes, and again I kind of froze, and I
- 36:21Speaker 1: reported it to my father, and my father, I guess,
- 36:25Speaker 1: to his credit to a degree, he believed me that
- 36:30Speaker 1: I was probably i know, seventeen eighteen maybe at the
- 36:36Speaker 1: time that this was occurring, and he confronted this friend,
- 36:40Speaker 1: and I think that ended the friendship. Like my father was,
- 36:43Speaker 1: you know, I'm done with you, and I think they'd
- 36:45Speaker 1: been friends for a very long time. But of course
- 36:49Speaker 1: I look back now it's like there was still no
- 36:50Speaker 1: police report made.
- 36:52Speaker 2: Well, that's right again. Again, you say something and it
- 36:56Speaker 2: has an impact on somebody else that you're now responsible for,
- 37:00Speaker 2: and there's nobody in your corner. There's nobody seeking justice
- 37:04Speaker 2: for you. You and I can see why now you've
- 37:07Speaker 2: just said enough of this, enough of this. You found
- 37:10Speaker 2: this material in the cupboard, that you've seen your mother's
- 37:14Speaker 2: lack of action. You know this individual is living in
- 37:17Speaker 2: Melbourne and you think, stuff it, there's going to be
- 37:20Speaker 2: some action. Now. How do you feel about how it's
- 37:24Speaker 2: gone for these years? It's still not happening, it's still
- 37:27Speaker 2: not making progress, and each day brings the likelihood that
- 37:32Speaker 2: this perpetrator will get away with it because you'll be
- 37:35Speaker 2: in the cemetery.
- 37:36Speaker 1: Yeah, it's constantly in the back of your mind that
- 37:40Speaker 1: one of these days, the next phone call from the
- 37:42Speaker 1: police will be to tell me that the investigations closed
- 37:46Speaker 1: because the perpetrator has died. And it's a huge concern.
- 37:52Speaker 1: Hence why sort of you know, I'm trying to find
- 37:55Speaker 1: you know, how can I, shall we say, help encourage
- 37:58Speaker 1: the police to give my case priority because it's a
- 38:03Speaker 1: unique priority. You know, I'm sure there are other older
- 38:06Speaker 1: perpetrators out there of current cases, and maybe the threat
- 38:10Speaker 1: for them dying is also real, But I can't say
- 38:13Speaker 1: that would be all of them, that the threat of
- 38:17Speaker 1: dying from old age is the reason for the priority
- 38:19Speaker 1: for other cases. I think it's just that, oh, there,
- 38:22Speaker 1: they're much more recent, and that's why you know, they're
- 38:26Speaker 1: striking while the iron's hot. So they say, well, it's
- 38:30Speaker 1: I think it's.
- 38:30Speaker 2: A getting a little bit cold again for mine. But
- 38:32Speaker 2: you know what, I find encouraging. That's probably the wrong word.
- 38:36Speaker 2: But despite this trauma, despite all you've been through, you've
- 38:40Speaker 2: had a functional life, You've had your own children, you
- 38:42Speaker 2: work as a theater, nurse in the hospital, you're in
- 38:45Speaker 2: a compassionate, caring profession. You've got on with life despite
- 38:50Speaker 2: these things. And I think for you not to get justice,
- 38:55Speaker 2: you've never complained, you've never given up, but to not
- 38:59Speaker 2: get justice at this stage is a borrent to me.
- 39:02Speaker 2: And I'm sure there are people listening out there right
- 39:04Speaker 2: now who were also victims of historical sexual assault. Now,
- 39:10Speaker 2: don't just sit there, don't just sit there, send us
- 39:12Speaker 2: an email, get in touch with crime stoppers. What do
- 39:15Speaker 2: you hope will happen. Now, I'm good, by the way,
- 39:18Speaker 2: I'm going to send this this podcast to Queensland Police.
- 39:20Speaker 2: I'm going to send it to Victoria Police, and we're
- 39:23Speaker 2: going to demand some answers on this what's actually happening.
- 39:26Speaker 2: If I can find this individual, why can't they, Why
- 39:30Speaker 2: can't they knock on his door and ask him after
- 39:33Speaker 2: all these years, what happened? And also whether he can
- 39:37Speaker 2: go back to Queensland and face up to these allegations,
- 39:40Speaker 2: because you're right, these pedophiles, they're rarely a one off thing.
- 39:47Speaker 2: There's other instances, and we've got dozens and dozens of
- 39:51Speaker 2: historical sexual assault cases involving women just like you, and
- 39:55Speaker 2: he may well be right for one or two of
- 39:57Speaker 2: those or more So. If you don't ask the question,
- 40:00Speaker 2: you don't get the answer. And right now he's likely
- 40:04Speaker 2: to escape out the chimney of the crematorium. And that's
- 40:08Speaker 2: just wrong, it's monstrous.
- 40:10Speaker 1: Yes, And so that's one of my reasons why I
- 40:14Speaker 1: don't believe I would be his first, because when you
- 40:19Speaker 1: look back at the age he would have been when
- 40:22Speaker 1: he came across me, he'd already was in his forties.
- 40:26Speaker 1: I can't, I just can't believe that he suddenly, you know,
- 40:32Speaker 1: developed this behavior in his forties. I don't believe that.
- 40:39Speaker 1: I'm much more likely to believe that there are other
- 40:41Speaker 1: victims who may have come forward and said something and
- 40:44Speaker 1: were also not believed, or I'm sure you've known that
- 40:49Speaker 1: this happened. A lot of cases, people don't say anything
- 40:50Speaker 1: at all. They just bottle it up and do hold
- 40:54Speaker 1: it with them for forty fifty, sixty, whatever year is,
- 40:57Speaker 1: until in their old age they finally will say something,
- 41:01Speaker 1: or they wait till the perpetrators died or relevant party
- 41:05Speaker 1: have died before they say something. I will just go
- 41:10Speaker 1: back to your mention about my functional life. I disagree
- 41:14Speaker 1: that it's been functional. It may in somewhat seem like
- 41:17Speaker 1: that on the outside, but it's been It's been a struggle.
- 41:21Speaker 1: You know. Yes, some are registered nurse, so I have
- 41:24Speaker 1: a degree from UNI. But that was a tough slog.
- 41:28Speaker 1: That was hard because of my struggles, because of my
- 41:32Speaker 1: lack of self esteem of believing that I could do it,
- 41:36Speaker 1: that I was worthy of it, which goes right back
- 41:39Speaker 1: to the same struggles I had in schooling, not being supported,
- 41:43Speaker 1: having this trauma that no one was allowed to know
- 41:45Speaker 1: about alone you know, helped me through the relationship that
- 41:50Speaker 1: produced my two children, was a domestic violence relationship for
- 41:54Speaker 1: many years. And you and again I seem to be
- 41:57Speaker 1: ahead of this curve when it comes to you know, catchphrases.
- 42:01Speaker 1: And so I was a victim of grooming by my
- 42:03Speaker 1: perpetrator before they knew what grooming was. All the same
- 42:07Speaker 1: with a lot that happened in this domestic violence relationship,
- 42:10Speaker 1: which was a lot of the you know, coercive control. Well,
- 42:13Speaker 1: people didn't know what that was then, I mean, domestic
- 42:16Speaker 1: violence itself was barely recognized. And even then, you know,
- 42:22Speaker 1: you really, you know, unless you turned up essentially on
- 42:26Speaker 1: death's door having been beaten to a pulp, you weren't believed.
- 42:31Speaker 1: And even then you probably you might have been sort
- 42:33Speaker 1: of well, what did you do that made him angry?
- 42:36Speaker 1: Like there was and even today, like we've moved a
- 42:39Speaker 1: long way with domestic violence, but we're still a long
- 42:42Speaker 1: way short when it comes to, you know, the prevention
- 42:46Speaker 1: and the management, et cetera. And so every step just
- 42:50Speaker 1: seems to have been a struggle. I I'm single. I've
- 42:53Speaker 1: been single for a long time because you know, one
- 42:58Speaker 1: probably the most important factor to have in a relationship
- 43:01Speaker 1: is trust and I just don't know I can never
- 43:05Speaker 1: could ever trust anyone again, because you know, to be
- 43:09Speaker 1: in a relationship, to have that sort of closeness, that
- 43:11Speaker 1: level of you know, intimacy and so forth, that's a
- 43:16Speaker 1: lot of trust that you in part to somebody else,
- 43:19Speaker 1: and I don't know that I can do that. So
- 43:22Speaker 1: so yes, I disagree with being functional. I think if anything,
- 43:26Speaker 1: I'm probably just that, you know, it's sort of not
- 43:30Speaker 1: really living. It's not you know, there's aspects of happiness,
- 43:34Speaker 1: but I wouldn't say overall it's a happy life. You know.
- 43:37Speaker 1: I'm now, you know, in the position of caring, ironically
- 43:41Speaker 1: caring for my mother with her dementia, despite you know,
- 43:46Speaker 1: essentially the lack of care that was offered to me
- 43:50Speaker 1: in my time of need. And there's you know, other things,
- 43:55Speaker 1: other things in there as well in the mix, just
- 43:57Speaker 1: because you know, life can be crap sometimes. But out
- 44:03Speaker 1: of this, I just obviously I'd like, you know, to believe,
- 44:07Speaker 1: to get a move on. But I would also really
- 44:09Speaker 1: implore that if there was anyone for their own circumstances,
- 44:14Speaker 1: to come forward, because you know, particularly if it turns
- 44:17Speaker 1: out that there's anyone who happened to have the same
- 44:20Speaker 1: perpetrator as me. I would hope that that would send
- 44:23Speaker 1: the investigation forward in leaps and bounds, just by the
- 44:28Speaker 1: sheer fact that there's someone else who can attest to
- 44:32Speaker 1: being a victim of his, because there must be out there.
- 44:36Speaker 1: I just can't believe that there wouldn't be.
- 44:38Speaker 2: I think you're probably right. He was working as an
- 44:40Speaker 2: interstate truck driver in this period, so he was mobile,
- 44:44Speaker 2: he was moving around the country, so it could well be.
- 44:47Speaker 2: I realized talking to you, how I lack the words
- 44:51Speaker 2: to really understand what you've been through and to help
- 44:54Speaker 2: you communicate. And you've done an amazing job in doing that.
- 44:58Speaker 2: And also I can sense the deep well of trauma
- 45:01Speaker 2: there is not just for you, but a whole generation
- 45:03Speaker 2: of young girls and women who suffered these indignities, these
- 45:08Speaker 2: crimes back in the eighties. Because the more I learn
- 45:12Speaker 2: about this, I've done in several cases now and it's
- 45:14Speaker 2: mister cruel in Victoria, cases like that where young girls
- 45:18Speaker 2: were abducted and sexually assaulted, and it was almost treated
- 45:21Speaker 2: as a social welfare issue back then. And that's something
- 45:25Speaker 2: that a child will eventually get over and integrate into
- 45:27Speaker 2: their lives, and your story just brings it home that
- 45:31Speaker 2: that's not the case at all. And I apologize for
- 45:34Speaker 2: even saying the word functional. I realized it's the wrong word.
- 45:37Speaker 2: You've done an amazing job. You said to me last night,
- 45:39Speaker 2: you feel like a broken cup, just in pieces, and
- 45:43Speaker 2: I can't imagine what that's like. I just admire your
- 45:46Speaker 2: strength for putting yourself a through a police investigation when
- 45:50Speaker 2: you've got to dragoon them and push them at every step,
- 45:54Speaker 2: and also do this interview because I'm sure there are
- 45:58Speaker 2: women listening right now, and you know who you are,
- 46:03Speaker 2: you know what you've been through, and you deserve justice too.
- 46:07Speaker 2: So if anything comes out of this, and I certainly
- 46:10Speaker 2: hope it does, and I'm going to keep pushing this.
- 46:11Speaker 2: As I said, I'm going to send the podcast to
- 46:13Speaker 2: Victoria Police and Queen's an police and say is this
- 46:15Speaker 2: good enough? It's one thing back in the day failing.
- 46:18Speaker 2: We understand that there was a lot of reasons why
- 46:21Speaker 2: it didn't go forward then, but today there's just no reason.
- 46:25Speaker 2: So flu, I really appreciate you sharing your story with
- 46:29Speaker 2: us today. And what message would you give to anybody
- 46:32Speaker 2: else who's in your position that.
- 46:35Speaker 1: I understand it's a difficult thing to talk about. You
- 46:39Speaker 1: don't want to be that person, but you know, having
- 46:47Speaker 1: had it buried away for so long has certainly not
- 46:49Speaker 1: done me any favors, and in trying to heal, it
- 46:57Speaker 1: needs to be brought to the surface, as painful as
- 47:00Speaker 1: it probably is. But it's just going to eat continue
- 47:04Speaker 1: to eat away at you if it's not if it's
- 47:08Speaker 1: not dealt with, really, if it's not spoken about with somebody,
- 47:12Speaker 1: at least talk to somebody, you know. If you don't
- 47:15Speaker 1: have a trusted family, a member or friend, you know,
- 47:19Speaker 1: you speak to a counselor even if you don't want
- 47:23Speaker 1: to go to the police. But this has clearly been
- 47:26Speaker 1: eating at me for all this time, and you know,
- 47:31Speaker 1: I have deliver with the frustration that I didn't speak
- 47:34Speaker 1: out sooner because I didn't, you know, essentially know who
- 47:36Speaker 1: to speak out sooner. And like I said, going back
- 47:38Speaker 1: to that penny drop moment, that I feel completely stupid
- 47:42Speaker 1: that expecting that people did do the right thing around
- 47:44Speaker 1: me at the time, and they didn't, And so I
- 47:49Speaker 1: don't think I'll get closure. It is an odd term.
- 47:55Speaker 1: I think sometimes it gets used a lot, but I'm
- 47:58Speaker 1: hoping to get maybe one day to some sort of peace.
- 48:02Speaker 1: Whether it's so it's not continuing to destroy me any
- 48:07Speaker 1: more than what it already has. I wouldn't want that
- 48:10Speaker 1: to be happening to other people as well, more than
- 48:13Speaker 1: it already has been.
- 48:14Speaker 2: And is I agree we use this word closure all
- 48:18Speaker 2: the time. It's not like closing a book or closing
- 48:21Speaker 2: a door. But I think it is about people finding
- 48:24Speaker 2: their voice. And I think your voice is strong, and
- 48:27Speaker 2: it's truthful, and you're seeking justice and I think that's
- 48:31Speaker 2: and the community should support that, and the police should
- 48:33Speaker 2: support that. So Flu, I really want to thank you
- 48:35Speaker 2: again for sharing it with me and for choosing me.
- 48:39Speaker 2: Most importantly, you've taught me a lot through this process,
- 48:41Speaker 2: talking to you over the weeks, and the little bit
- 48:44Speaker 2: of work I've put into it to locate the perpetrator.
- 48:47Speaker 2: I hope the police are doing the same thing. They
- 48:49Speaker 2: go back to that door, knock on his door, so
- 48:50Speaker 2: one day he has to face it, and you might
- 48:53Speaker 2: get a moment where he admits his culpability. Whether he
- 48:58Speaker 2: goes to jail or something, I don't know, but that's
- 49:01Speaker 2: the really least we can expect that our police will
- 49:03Speaker 2: take up the casules on you will be half and
- 49:05Speaker 2: other people as well. So if you're out there, I
- 49:08Speaker 2: urge you have counseling, work out what you can do
- 49:12Speaker 2: and if you can bring a case, call crime Stoppers
- 49:15Speaker 2: one one hundred, triple three, triple zero. PLU. Thank you
- 49:18Speaker 2: so much for sharing the story today. Thank you, and
- 49:23Speaker 2: that's flu. It's an amazing story for mine and you
- 49:26Speaker 2: can see the isolation she suffered from the very beginning
- 49:29Speaker 2: where she was made to feel like she was the
- 49:31Speaker 2: one causing the problem. And you've heard her voice, insistent,
- 49:38Speaker 2: almost polite, saying, please give me justice, and there's more
- 49:42Speaker 2: of you out there. It's not too late. Please get
- 49:45Speaker 2: in touch with police and if polease won't help you,
- 49:48Speaker 2: send me an email. Adam Shanner, writer at gmail dot com.
- 49:52Speaker 2: This has been a real crime with Adam shanned Thank
- 49:54Speaker 2: you for listening. Thanks for listening to this episode and
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