Latest / Soul Salon with Ayandastood / Your Dreams Can't Find You When You're HIDING

Transcript

Your Dreams Can't Find You When You're HIDING · Soul Salon with Ayandastood

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  Your dreams are allergic to you hiding and they are attracted, like so turned on
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  by the version of you who is allowing themselves to be seen, okay?
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  Your dreams are allergic to you hiding but they are so attracted, turned on,
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  drawn to the version of you who allows themselves to be seen,
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  who allows themselves to take up space, who allows themselves to be witnessed even as they
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  are in the process of figuring it out, who doesn't wait, who doesn't think they have to have all
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  the answers in order to show up. Like when I say attracted, are you hearing me? Like there is
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  a desire energy that is so drawn to the version of you who shows up.
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  Have you ever been in a room where there's maybe a panel or a talk? It's an event, okay?
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  And then there's the segment of asking questions and I'm always opposed to like I'm not going
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  to ask a question but the people who ask questions in the room who allow themselves to be seen,
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  who share a reflection. Do you notice that after the event, who's the person who has a lot of
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  people who goes up to them, to talk to them, to introduce themselves? It's the people who raise
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  their hand in that room. The people who allowed themselves to be seen and share how they feel,
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  share what they think, become like magnets. I once went to this event where someone shared at
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  the event that she was having an affair, like she was quote unquote the other woman.
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  And she was really vulnerable and I mean this is a reality of our times. This happens, okay?
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  And she was vulnerable and it's one thing to be vulnerable on the internet. She was vulnerable
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  in a room full of people who could have judged her. And you know who had so many people going up
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  to them afterwards to talk to them? This woman who disclosed this truth. Who was brave was sharing
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  her truth. Now we're not going to pass judgment. I believe what we judge becomes our destiny. We're
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  not going to pass judgment. We're just saying she didn't have to share that. She could have sat
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  there and hidden but she chose to be seen. And afterwards she had all these people coming up to her.
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  She was a magnet. She was like honey to the bees in that room. She made herself findable. People
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  knew, oh, if I want to talk about affairs or if I want to talk about shame or if I want to talk
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  about desire, that's what I need to go talk to. She made herself findable. So there's always two
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  of us in every single seat that we sit in. The version of us who's going to keep quiet, who's
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  going to have the idea but not raise their hands, who's going to have the question but say it's
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  not good enough. And then yes, someone else asked it and the guest says, oh, that's such a good
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  question. And you're like, oh my god, I had that exact question. When in a meeting you have an idea
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  and then someone else says and you're like, fuck, I had that exact idea. Just should have believed
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  in myself. You know, when someone makes a video that you were going to make, I mean, you can still make it.
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  But okay, what we want to understand, what we want to tap into is the two of us in this seat.
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  Okay, the version of us who's going to silence themselves and say it's not good enough. I'm not
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  going to keep it to myself. I'm going to hoard my gifts. I'm going to defend myself. And then
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  there's a version of us who allows himself to say, I'm going to ask this question. I'm going to say
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  this idea. I'm going to share this message. So it's like the idea of the two wolves within each
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  of us and the wolf we decide to feed. There are always two possibilities. I mean, obviously we all
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  know there's far more. There's far more, you know, nothing is binary. But we're using this as a
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  mental model that there's the version of us who's playing small and there's the version of us
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  who's willing to take up space. And there are always those two possibilities. In any given moment
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  someone asks you, what do you do? There's a version of you who shrinks, who downplays,
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  who minimizes. There's a version of you who takes up space. There's a version of you who allows
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  themselves to be experienced. And these people, they call them, you know, they rattle some feathers.
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  You know what I mean? People who allow themselves to be seen, they can be triggering, allowing
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  yourself to be seen, not conforming to what the society says you're supposed to be seen as,
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  allowing yourself to take pride in the very things that society is trying to impose a sense of shame
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  on you for. That is radical. That is rebellious. That is revolutionary. So visibility, you know,
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  on the surface it can seem shallow. Why do you want to be? It can seem like egocentric. Oh, you
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  just want to be famous or you just want to be known. You know, you just want to, it's about your
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  ego. But when we look deeper, I know all of us on this frequency, we know it's actually very deep
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  because who allows themselves to be seen in a society will dictate parts of what that society
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  gets to live. What do I mean by this? If you have incredible poets who have amazing poetry,
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  but they don't ever share the poetry, we never become the kind of society that's moved by poems.
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  If you have a bunch of people who have a very loving message to share, such as yourself, but they
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  don't allow themselves to share it, we don't get to become the kind of society that hears loving
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  messages. Are you receiving what I'm radiating? I think you are. Who we become as a collective kind of
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  is in part tied to who allows themselves to be seen. Now, of course, what we know is it's not
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  rarely on to the self. It's systemic because certain voices are repressed and suppressed, but now
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  more than ever, we have the platforms to speak. Many of us now, of course, primarily institutions
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  are the gatekeepers. Still institutions of racism, institutions of sexism, institutions of
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  ageism, because I just know if you're an elder, oh my goodness, we need to hear from you.
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  I just I just I just that just dropped in from source. Okay, we need to hear from you. We need to
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  see you. Oh my word, what the society does. I mean, I'm so grateful. Like we all hold many
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  different identities. I'm just so grateful to be an African woman because something that we do
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  that I really love is we cherish our elders. We cherish all the women. They are like our leaders.
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  In any family, local runs a show of black families is a black woman. And so I feel like that's true
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  in the diaspora. African people, African American people, the role that black women play is very
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  important. And this is true in many different black and brown and communities. But what I want to
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  say with that is what I mean to say with that is a society that is agist, which is what Western
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  societies are. And that doesn't believe all the people should be seen. That believes all the
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  people should be secluded and removed from society and hidden is setting itself up to be unwise,
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  to repeat mistakes of the past is actually an incredible Audrey Lord quote about this. Should I
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  read it? As we move toward creating a society within which we can each flourish,
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  ageism is another distortion of relationship which interferes with our vision. By ignoring
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  the past, we are encouraged to repeat its mistakes. The generation gap is an important social tool
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  for any repressive society. If the younger members of a community view the older members as
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  contemptible or suspect or excess, they will never be able to join hands and examine the living
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  memories of the community, nor ask the all important question. Why? This gives rise to a historical
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  amnesia that keeps us working to invent the will every time we have to go to the store for bread.
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  We find ourselves having to repeat and re-learn the same old lessons over and over that our
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  mothers did because we do not pass on what we have learned or because we are unable to listen.
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  For instance, how many times has this all been said before?
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  And this is by design. So that's why why would the paradigm of patriarchy be ageist? Because as you
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  grow as a woman you come more and more into your power. So what are they going to do? Reduce your
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  power in the social sphere. Because of how potent and strong that you are. Okay, so I just know all the
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  women we need to hear you and see you older non-binary and queer people just elders. All the men too
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  who are on the path of being a loving man in this world. That's something I really stand for by the
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  way. Like I it's so funny that you can't really advocate for the humanity of men without being
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  called a pick me. That's so strange to me. But I am for I'm on the side of people who are
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  invested in love and sacredness. People who are trying to be soft in a world that killed them to
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  be hard. And that has no gender. Okay, that has no gender. And that resonance it's so deep. Okay,
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  and you feel into it. Okay, so anyways, I don't even know where we were going. But what I wanted to
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  say is that allow the possibility that your dreams want to come to you easily. And what's the easiest
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  way for something to reach you is for you to make yourself findable. You could be in a room full of
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  the most magical people. But the one wearing a t-shirt you could be a singer in a room looking for
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  a producer. And they could be producers all around you. But who's the producer you're going to find?
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  The one with a t-shirt that says I'm a music producer. Do you hear what I'm saying? The dream
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  finds you much more easily. It's attracted to you when you make yourself findable. When you state
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  your values, when you state your vision, when you share yourself and you allow yourself to be
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  that version of you who's taken up space. And I know it's going to feel uncomfortable. It's going
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  to feel unsettling because we are taught to shrink so early in our lives. We're taught to take up
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  less and less space. So it's going to feel unnatural. But know that it is your destiny or you wouldn't
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  feel cold to it. So it is natural in a deeper spiritual sense. So it's going to feel unnatural
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  in the embodied socially conditioned sense. But know that it is natural in a deeper spiritual and
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  soulful space. What do I mean by this? It is our nature to be magnetic. It is our nature. Think
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  of a peacock. Think of the sunshine. Think of the bird song. It's our nature. Nature uses
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  attention as a technology. Why is a rainbow so magnificent? Why is the sun so beautiful?
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  Nature wants to be attended to. The male peacock that has all the feathers,
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  wants the female peacock to look at it so that it can perform its mating ritual and mate.
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  It has a goal. Attention is very purposeful. So everything in nature I believe
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  is sort of made and constructed in a way such that it is paid attention to. A baby comes with
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  lungs to scream so that it can get its needs met. It doesn't sit there silently. It screams for
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  what it wants. It doesn't even know how to articulate exactly what it wants. It just screams
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  whether it's hungry, tired, etc. So we have attention and being able to attract attention to us
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  as part of our birthright. It's our birthright to be attended to.
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  When a baby is born we say I'm going to go see the baby. There's something reverent about looking
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  about what we choose to look at. So when we acknowledge that we are part of the cosmos that
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  deserves to be witnessed, just like the night sky, just like the full moon, we deserve to be
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  beheld, like behold me. I'm worthy of being witnessed. I have an inherent magic and majesty
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  to my spirit that deserves to be seen. And for some of us that comes through in the way we write,
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  that deserves to be seen. If you write in a way that moves people, that deserves to be seen.
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  For others of you it's the way that you express through colour and fashion and that's just striking.
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  You know when you're somewhere and you just notice the colours and notice how people call your
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  attention and it's like wow look at her, look at them. Oh my goodness. And there's this like all.
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  What is all but divine attention allowing yourself to be moved by something. Okay so we had a
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  lot to say but what I want you to take away, what I invite you to take away from this is your dreams
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  are really drawn to the version of you who allows himself to show up because it's so much easier to
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  find you. For your dreams to find you, for your dream collaborators, opportunities, mentors,
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  peers, money, abundance, love, partnership. It's all so much easier for them to find you. It's all
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  so much easier for them to reach you when you insist on making yourself findable. We are choosing
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  love over logic. It doesn't have to make sense the way you want to be seen. You want to start
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  calling yourself a magician. You want to start calling yourself a poet. You want to start calling
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  yourself a singer even though people around you are like oh my god what since when are you a coach.
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  We're choosing love over logic. There's something you love about that identity that speaks to you.
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  There's something you love about your inner child that you want to allow to shine through you.
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  So we're choosing love over logic. We're choosing resonance. What calls to you? Because what calls to you
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  calls through you. I'll say that again what calls to you calls through you.
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  And we are choosing magic over mind. What feels like magic to us. And you are part of the
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  cosmos's magic. No one could deny that. Who could deny that? What is in the sunset to behold?
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  What is in the bird song to be an awe of is in you. All the magic in the universe can't be
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  separated from you. So we're going to claim our right to take up space, divine space. It's safe to be
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  judged. We don't need to live our lives pretending like we came to earth to avoid people's judgment
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  that is a life far too small for us. If you make the avoidance of judgment the north star that
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  your life follows you're not going to land somewhere that you feel really represents how grand
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  and gorgeous your life could have been. If you spend your life trying to avoid what people might
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  say about you you're going to look back and you won't be in awe of the life that you led.
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  So what I say to myself you add ten years to your life. So whatever age you are you ask your
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  ten years from now self. What gift could I give to you? I do this quite often. So I'm 30 and I
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  ask myself okay what what does my 40 year old self want from me. What would they love to receive
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  as a gift? And let me tell you avoiding judgment oh no one judged you that's not a gift that I
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  want to give her that's not a gift that she wants to receive. A life more magical than she possibly
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  could have imagined abundant love abundant purpose creativity service feeling like I gave to the world
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  receivership feeling like I also received from the world and allowed that to be juicy.
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  Abundant creativity all of these forms of living and expanding and feeling alive feeling like you are
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  in your spark that's what I want to give to her. And each of those things in some shape or form
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  will involve me being judged. If you pursue an abundant life in that pursuit because most people
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  don't live an abundant life that is systemic I'm not it's definitely not individual that's because
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  of the systems we live in. If you pursue freedom because we're conditioned to distrust freedom
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  and to think we don't deserve to experience it you will be judged in the pursuit of freedom
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  as all people who pursued freedom both for themselves and for the collective were judged.
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  So being misunderstood is like the cost of entry I don't even like cost metaphors or price
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  metaphors being misunderstood is what we are asked to hold let's say that for now I'm going to
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  come up with a metaphor and share it with you but that's what we're asked to hold in order to
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  live a life that is beyond the skin of our current existence you know like this shading snake or the
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  shading that happens in molting that happens throughout nature so that you grow out of the cocoon
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  that was once protecting you is now suffocating you and you know when it's time it's time it's time
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  to lead this cave yes this cave so of the purpose hiding also has a nature a purpose in nature
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  nature uses the technology of hiding as well of a cave of a womb of a cocoon of a shell to hide
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  what is sacred and needs protection but we know when the time to be in the cave has run out it's like
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  we're ready for the next thing now we want to feel the sun and our skin we we feel stagnant we
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  feel like we want more and what's beautiful is that in you pursuing your wanting of more we get to
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  become more through you so your desire has a collective purpose it has a divine purpose it has a
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  creative purpose and we hope that you'll trust that in you taking up space you expand the space for
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  the collective in you giving yourself permission you become the permission for us to experience and
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  receive I'm sending you so much love I hope this has served your deepest consciousness and I will
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  see you on the next soul session I love you bye my darling my love my soul sibling thank you
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  for stepping into the soul salon if you are still hearing or watching this we are soul siblings
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  we are resonating on the same frequency and so something you may struggle with that I struggle with
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  is the fear of being seen you know that visibility is involved in you living your creative purpose
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  and being in your power serving the collective through your gifts through your magic through your
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  medicine in order to do that you know you need to be more seen than you are allowing yourself to be
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  right now I have a gift just for you heart made for us on this frequency and it is a free ebook
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  called the soulful visibility guide that is soulful visibility like we don't just want to be seen we
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  want to be felt we want to be heard we want to move and be moved so I do have a free gift for you
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  and all you need to do is go to my website I understood dot com and there you will be able to
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  input your email address and receive this directly to your inbox this is such a juicy and delicious
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  guide and I change the free offering every few months so you know get it while you can all the
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  links are in the show notes so thank you so much I love you and I will see you on the next
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  sole session okay I love you bye