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The #1 Reason Most Youth Pastors QUIT Within The First 2 Years · Ministry Coach: Youth Ministry Tips & Resources

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: What is the number one reason most youth pastors quit within the first two years?
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: That's what we're talking about today on the Ministry Coach Podcast.
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Ministry Coach Podcast, where we bring you weekly tips and tactics to help you fast track the growth and health of your youth ministry.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: My name is Jeff Laskola and this is Kristen Laskola, and today we're going to talk about the number one reason that youth pastors quit within their first two years.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: Now, there could be a lot of reasons, but I'm just going to talk about the one that I think is the culprit for most of them.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: I think anytime you quit, it's a mixed bag of scenarios and emotions and circumstances, and it usually is not a very light decision.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: But I've noticed an underlying cause.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: No matter what the circumstances, this seems to be present somewhere, and that is loneliness.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: And I don't mean loneliness like in your personal life, like I have no friends or family.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: That is a hard situation, but that's not usually what leads to quitting your job.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about leadership loneliness.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: That's a very specific brand of lonely that I think a lot of youth pastors suffer from.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: And if it goes on too long, what it does is it were leadership lonely.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: So now you can't overcome a particular circumstance or a particular season or a particular problem because through the lens of loneliness those things are insurmountable and cause you to throw in the towel.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: You don't see a way out, you don't see it ever getting better and the like kind of depressive heart colors.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: The way that you see those things, so, what do we mean by that?
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: So I think the biggest thing on the positive side that brings job satisfaction to anybody, but specifically youth pastors, is the people around you, the team, and so the people around you could be like the, your volunteers, your interns, your, your leaders, the people who work most closely with you, like the people in your youth ministry?
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: In your youth ministry itself.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: So I feel like you can put up with a lot of challenges if you're arm and arm with people that you genuinely love, that love you, that have your back, that are supportive, that are cheering you on, that are encouraging you constantly.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: And I think back to my really early days in youth ministry, after I switched from our main campus to our first off-site campus.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: That was probably the worst our ministry ever was.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: We didn't have a permanent location.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: We were at a community center.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: We had only like 11 students.
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: They were awesome students, but it was just a very small ministry and we only had a handful of leaders.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: We weren't growing.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: There were so many like infrastructure things we had to put in place.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: Yet I look back at those times as some of the best because of who was around me.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: We were recently watching some old youth ministry videos that when Jeff was one of my leaders and my very first intern, this guy named Bryant and one of our really good friends named Dana, and then we had this awesome leader named Zach join and it was just like the five of us and we were just like we don't have a lot, but we've got each other.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: And I feel like because we had so much fun.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: Like I remember we would go on Tuesdays to the junior high school to attend their Christian club, but we'd all go together so we weren't lonely, barely have any kids, but oh well, we were together.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: And then we'd make a day of it and go to lunch after at pedro's tacos and just sit out on the patio for an hour or two just laughing and having a great time.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: We would make the most ridiculous, cringy youth group videos just for fun.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: Like we wouldn't even show them to the students.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Like we would do like blue day, like let's make a weird, like I'm blue, whatever.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: And just like these obnoxious videos, but we'd have the best time doing it.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: So, while the youth ministry from the outside it was like we're holding on and we're doing okay, it wasn't like this place is blowing up and it's awesome and everyone wants to come.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: It was like holding its own.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: But if I were doing that by myself, I think I would have been so discouraged of, like, what's going on, like why aren't we growing?
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: And we, you know, you focus on things differently when you're alone.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: Like well, I went to the Christian club but I had to show up by myself and sit by myself and try to get to know kids by myself.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: But when you have that safety and numbers of peers because, like, the students are your friends but not your friends, you know what I mean Like they're not the ones who are going to carry you through, emotionally, through the well, this sucks today and only one girl showed up for our girls event.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: True story, painfully awkward.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: But it's like you have each other and you're just like well, we'll get them next time and you can see things more positively because your heart isn't lonely.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: But when it's lonely, those blows knock you down, and so I don't really know what I would have done if it weren't for you and Bryant and Dana and Zach, but how we were just kind of charging this hill together and some weeks were awesome, some weeks weren't, but we were always having a good time and we were genuinely friends.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: And I think when you look at the people you're running side by side with, can you say that those people are your friends?
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Do you enjoy being with them?
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Or are they just people who show up and you guys kind of do ministry and then they go home but there's no life happening.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: I really encourage you.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: Try to find that running mate, those people that you would hang out with even if it weren't for youth group, because that's going to salvage your lonely heart on the days where youth ministry is just like no, no you know this is not going well and to clarify, though, I mean it doesn't mean they have to be your BFFs.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: No, you know this is not going well and to clarify, though, I mean it doesn't mean they have to be your BFFs like, but they are the people.
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: It's like that, always that work person where you're like if you quit.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: I'm gone, you know.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: And just like that really strong connection where, yeah, I mean you would hang out with them, but it doesn't necessarily have to be your like, tell them everything, best friend in the whole wide world.
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: But within the context of ministry and life, I guess, yeah, you would say this, but I think it really does have to be someone you would be willing to hang out with outside of a Tuesday or Wednesday night Right.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: Like we started, I think, after the Office, the finer things club.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: Right, we started, I think, after the Office the finer things club and we would come over to your house here and someone would choose the movie and then you would choose the meal to go with the movie.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: You'd have to theme it and we'd make dinner together, watch a movie together.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: And that had nothing to do with youth ministry, we just were like, hey, let's do something fun on.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: Friday night and I think it's like, yeah, it doesn't have to be your best friends in the whole wide world.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: I'm sure you have your best friend spot filled, but just people who you really would wanna hang out with.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: I think that just makes ministry consistently enjoyable when it is difficult, because at least you can look at the people around you and say I don't like what we're doing and I don't like how this is going.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: But I don't like who we're doing it for but I like who I'm doing it with and there's a lot of things I can do because I'm doing them with the right people.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: But, like even when you're, I remember certain camps where I didn't have, like, my crew with me.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: The problem seemed bigger, the problem seemed like more insurmountable.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: The problem seemed more painful and daunting, Whereas I felt more confidence that I could face challenges when I had someone who was a friend, who I felt like had my back, who was encouraging me, that I could kind of let loose with a little bit and be honest with and like that.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: I didn't have to say little buttoned up youth pastor around but I could be like dang, I'm frustrated, Be like I know.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: Dude, that sucked All right.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: Well, let's go to bed, We'll get it in the morning.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: You know, just someone to be like, hey, take a break, I'll go do it for you, or you know, you've already talked to too many students today.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Let me take this one.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: This kid's crying, I got you, you know, and having people that see you, you know and are partnering with you, that is like you can't put a price tag on that.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: And then you know the relationships with other church staff and your church leadership is really important too, because you could be a little bit siloed from the church staff overall and that increases leadership loneliness as well, to where you and the senior pastor are rowing against each other.
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: You are never rowing in the right direction or the same direction and it's constant tension.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I think that's a category of loneliness that makes you feel again that feeling of problems are bigger than they are because your heart is so tangled up with this person or, like the peers that you work with, maybe you don't get along well with one of the other pastors or one of the other staff members, and it's this constant grind, grind, grind and that creates work loneliness and leadership loneliness, but being in harmony as far as it depends on you, as the Bible says but being in right relationship with people really is such a boost of energy and confidence and longevity fuel to your leadership.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I think you gain resilience in the context of relationships, and so I think the question that all of us are going to hopefully process this week is am I mistaking problems for being unsolvable, Like I'm ready to throw in the towel?
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: Is it really the problem?
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Or could you be falling victim to leadership loneliness, to where you just feel disconnected from team and leadership and coworkers and there's no health in those relationships?
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: So it's actually not the problem you can't solve, it's the resilience you don't have because you're disconnected.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: Have you siloed yourself?
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: And I think youth pastors can kind of get into that, Like, well then I'll just do my job if I can't get along with you and I'll stick my head in the sand.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: Then I'll just do my job if I can't get along with you and I'll stick my head in the sand and I'll just focus on me.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: And that seems like a good solution for a little while.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: But it really creates this disconnect within the staff or within leadership within the church that it will start to bleed out in certain ways and you don't even realize it.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: It's just you feel icky, Problems are big, Everything sucks.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: You start getting bitter where, like one relationship could be the difference between you leaving and loving your job?
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: Now, some of that is going to depend on you.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: If there's some brokenness that you need to fix and some of that maybe going to depend on you.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: If there's some brokenness that you need to fix and some of that maybe you're like, well, I would love to have a BFF leader, like where do I find that person?
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: Some of that's going to depend on prayer as well.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: If you're just like you're right, I need that Like homie, like to do ministry with.
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: Why not pray and ask God like I'm lonely in my leadership role.
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: I just wish I had a running mate.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: I just wish I had someone who I would look and see their car in the parking lot and get so excited that they were there today.
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: Can you send me that person?
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: Like where are they?
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: And you'll be so surprised.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: Like every time I've prayed for something like that specific for my ministry, god always comes through Like we need a.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: Where am I ever going to find a girl's small group leader for seventh grade?
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: I?
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: I've asked everyone.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: I know there's no one left and then I pray and like oh, where did you come from?
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: Like random person introduces us or they come up to me after church or I get a email out of the blue like God can come through, you don't have to be like all right, strategy 101, how to recruit a ministry best friend.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: It's like you could pray for that person to come into your ministry.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: Like kind of just pouring that heart out to God, of like I want to keep doing this but I need some relationship here or else I'm going to burn out.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: And you know, it's true, you probably will Like without someone by your side to keep you going and talk you off a ledge once in a while, or just let you vent and be frustrated and then keep going.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: Because I think sometimes youth pastors feel like they have to keep up this act or this persona, like you're just dying on the inside because the kids were just so bad.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: You know, on a youth group night you're just like, no, just praise god that they were here, hearing the word, even though you were like, oh my gosh, I had to like call three parents and send two home and these kids were fighting and this and that.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: But wouldn't it be nice just to be able to look at someone at the end of the night who gets it because they were there and be like what was that?
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, if we had a night like that every week, I don't know if I'd still be here.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Like you've got to be able to just say what you think sometimes and not have to be the performative youth pastor.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: And if you're not close to anyone on your team, you probably will slide into the role of performative youth pastor.
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: You won't be authentic or real or whatever.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: But who's that safe person?
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: And your spouse is, obviously, but sometimes somebody there who saw it happen.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: If your spouse doesn't help out, it's just like can we just talk about what just happened that was so stressful, get?
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: Can we just talk about what just happened that was so stressful?
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: Get it out, talk about it, eat some chocolate, high five, call it a night you know, but I don't know what I do without those people.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: I have so many on my team that have my back and are my biggest cheerleaders, my biggest supporters, and now they know me so well that when something happens, they'll give me a look like oh no you know, but and then we bounce back like just showing your cracks a little bit of like, oh, I did not like that, or okay, that was stressful, or who that kid, that was a lot I, or that parent totally screamed at me for something like I mean just having that soft landing of your team to say that was rough.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: We saw that, okay.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: Well, how about let's try again next week?
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: Right what do you guys think so?
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: Hopefully that makes sense.
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: But just be cautious of the leadership loneliness being the real culprit of the reason you want to quit, Because that could be the underlying issue of a problem You're thinking is unsolvable but might not actually be.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and a lot of those friendships and the bonds that you have with people that you're working with on your team and youth ministry really become fostered through, not just there at youth ministry but all the things that you do outside of that.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Like you just two nights ago or whatever it was was, you had all your leaders over to hang out, had breakfast for dinner, it was so good, still thinking about it because it's interesting from my perspective.
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: I'm not part of your team and there was at least six or seven people there that I honestly had never even seen before.
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: But even me being I mean, I was just kind of popping in and out, I wasn't even really a part of it.
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: I feel connected even with some of those people.
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: I was just sneaking you food upstairs.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: I know I was hiding but I feel like hanging out and talking and laughing, all of a sudden it's like, oh, there's a connection.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: You know, like I feel like I kind of know you now and the more of those that you kind of allow to happen, that's that bond is going to grow, whereas, like it's like any job, where it's like the only time you see each other is, you know, when you're part-time, shift and clock in and clock out.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: I've.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: I used to work at a marriott property where we had to dress up like I was in a suit and tie every single day and sometimes when there'd be an outside of work casual like event, you're like that's what you that's what you dress like normally.
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: Oh, like I'm feeling I I'm getting to know the real you all of a sudden.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: Just something as simple as that you're a horrible.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: You're horrible.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: You can't match anything.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: Your style is awful, no, but it's just interesting when you see people outside of the normal environment and you do things fun together and you laugh together and you bond that way, then all of a sudden you become closer and closer and then it just makes the time when you are together in the trenches different and more.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Um, what's the word I'm looking for?
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: Like there's just that connection I feel like is there's no other, better way of saying it's just the connection that you have is deeper?
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: when you give those opportunities to get to know each other outside of the of the task you guys are normally doing yeah, and it really does give you the strength to do difficult things.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: How?
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: often do you do those like how many times a year do you do leader?
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: Leader night out leader night where there's no student, it's just the leaders.
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: For the sake of having fun, not training.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: Oh, I don't train yeah, we don't for those nights like what, how many?
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: How many times a year do you say you do that?
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: so so we do it every three months, which ends up, obviously simple math, being four times a year.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: And then the big one is the leader retreat, so it's four leader night outs and a leader retreat, and that one we do a weekend, two nights, three days.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like Veterans Day weekend, I think, in November days.
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like veterans day weekend, I think, in november.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: So it's great we could actually do an extra night because monday's off, but yeah, we stay in a cabin and literally we don't do any.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: Like jeff said, no training, no, like brainstorming or anything like.
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: That's like we are here to eat and have fun and play games and sleep and relax and do whatever we want, cause everyone is so busy and all my leaders work, like don't mistake, like oh well, do they not have jobs?
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: They can just la-di-da play all the time?
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: No, everyone works.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: A lot of them are married, with children and careers and all this stuff.
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: But that's all the more reason why, when you do these, things to make this stuff, but so that's all the more reason why, when you do these things, to make them legitimately fine.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: That's what I was gonna say.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: It's like so that's why we come to play and I believe, like fun.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: I don't know if everyone needs it as much as I do.
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: I think maybe I just project like, well, you must need it as much as I do.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: Remember I came home the other day I was telling Jeff turns out I'm not depressed, I just needed to have some fun, cause I was like dragging at the end of summer, like, oh, I can't go one more day.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: And then my friend and I went for e-bike rides and lunch and coffee went down to the beach and I'm like, oh, I guess that's all.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: I needed I feel like a totally normal person again, and so I try to make that for my leaders Like we are here to have fun.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: Don't you dare work.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: We're doing some fun stuff.
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: I don't want to hear about anything unless it's a funny story about a student.
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: We're not going to solve any problems, we're just going to play VR or we're going to eat or we're going for a hike, I don't know, but it's going to be fun.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: So never underestimate the spiritual power of fun.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: You know, with your leaders, we are so good at planning fun stuff for our students.
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: Right and full circle.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: That's the reason why we do those things for the students is so they connect, yes, and they get to know each other and build those relationships.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: It's the same thing.
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, I guess bottom line is those relationships build resilience in you and plan ways to make sure that is happening.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: Well, let's do a question of the day, and this is gonna be a tough one.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: I tried to make this very tough personally.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: This is an elimination, so you can only keep two of these and the rest will be eliminated.
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: And I can read them more than once if you need me to, and save your comments to the end, because some of them I'm giving for the viewer and listeners.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: They may like these things I already know some of the opinions you have on some of them.
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: Give my opinions to myself.
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: You can only keep two of these mayonnaise, ranch, ketchup, mustard, salsa, salsa though what I like to comment on that you weirdo.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: Nobody says salsa, except for my mom.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: She also says spatula.
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: Salsa, hot sauce, soy sauce, barbecue sauce.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh.
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: Again, really quick, you can only keep two Mayonnaise, ranch, ketchup, mustard, salsa, hot sauce, soy sauce, barbecue sauce.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: I probably am going to say I'm going to keep hot sauce.
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: It's tough.
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: I could get by without soy sauce, because I'll use ponzu instead.
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: So I will use salsa.
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: You work with junior hires, don't you Fighting loopholes?
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I can create my own salsa if I used salsa.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: Salsa.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: And hot sauce.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: Salsa and hot sauce.
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: Salsa and hot sauce.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: Salsa.
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: Wow, okay, mine was going to be um, cause I don't like ponzu, soy sauce and ranch.
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: I thought really hard about ranch, but I think Caesar will do the trick.
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: What about you guys put in the comment section below pick two that you can keep.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: The rest of them will be eliminated.
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's hard.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: It is hard.
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: I was going to say three, but I wonder if it will vary by placement in the country.
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: Probably Because like.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: I could see some people.
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: Barbecue sauce.
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, being able to live without barbecue sauce.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: This is a community comment of the day.
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: This comes from Reginald Miniweather, who says Hello, ministry coaches, you two are a jewel to the body of Christ.
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: I just found your podcast, about a month ago, and you two have blessed my heart tremendously.
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: I will be taking over as the youth pastor for my church and I'm so nervous.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: Your content has given me so many ideas and resource suggestions I would probably never have found if I didn't watch your podcast.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: Keep up the awesome job.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Thanks Reginald.
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: Thanks Reginald.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: That's awesome.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: Can we call you Reggie?
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: It's very encouraging to hear.
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: It was great.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: I loved that.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: Appreciate it.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: Thank you, guys, so much for watching and listening and we'll see you next time.
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: The reality is, most youth pastors quit within the first two years, and this is why.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: And this is the reason why.
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: And this is the reason why the reality is, most youth pastors quit within the first two years.