Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #125 Angry Bottoms, First Day Of School Panic And Unhelpful Toddlers

Transcript

#125 Angry Bottoms, First Day Of School Panic And Unhelpful Toddlers · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I thought I shipped myself at the park. This is recently,
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: this is over the Christmas break, so obviously it's.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Festive festive season.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Yes, I spent a lot of time on the booze
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: on the boozer, and we were down to the park
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: and I was sitting there and I slipped out a
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: farts and I thought I shipped myself. And I said
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: to it, oh, I think I shipped myself. Instead of
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: like laugh, thought it was funny, she thought it was disgusting.
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: There is only that reaction to that.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: She was like so disappointed, and she was like, do
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: you know what that's divorcible?
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Oh wow?
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: And I said that all it would take and she
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: was like, it's not very funny. Anyway, I wipe myself and.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: I was clean.
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: So you didn't chet yourself.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: I didn't. It just felt like I did. How good
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: it feel like you did? Just the velocity of the fart,
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: your fart. Happy.
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: I'm happy that you guys are still happily married.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I know how to get at a quick divorce
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: to ship myself in public.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Welcome back to.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: Two doting dads, well, one doting dad and another doting mom.
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: Laura, I'm back again.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: I'm bar you're back. This is a podcast all about parenting.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: It's the good, the bad, and the.
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: Relatable, reasonable reasonable, the reasonably relatable.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I didn't I wasn't going to tell you that shitting
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: myself story. I forgot till you just reminded me.
• 1:34
  Speaker 4: What was it that I said that actually reminded you
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: because I can't.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: Did you shoot yourself again? And I was like, I
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: was like, how do you know? No, it wasn't. It
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: wasn't a ship myself. I did shit myself the other day.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: Though. No, we can't talk about me sitting myself.
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: I haven't said a single thing. I'm just sitting here
• 1:52
  Speaker 4: with my mouth closed. And the more silent I am,
• 1:55
  Speaker 4: the craziest stuff comes out of your mouth.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: I want to tell you a little story actually before
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: we kick off. Trap on in everyone. No, no, this
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: happened yesterday last night. Actually. So I live in close
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: proximity to like.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: A group of shops that there's a couple of like restaurants, takeaway,
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: so convenient, convenient. It's just like it's just the hill.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: So I ride my electric bike. It's great, nice, it
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: is nice. Had a couple of beers yes afternoon, and
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: I drove down to pick up. They do five dollars
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: tacos at this place, which is great. Not that that's
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: specifical any anything to do with the story.
• 2:32
  Speaker 4: But all of these flags all yeah, and the picture
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: is that you might have shuit yourself.
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: This is not sh myself.
• 2:39
  Speaker 4: It sounds like sorry, Jess. She's just looking at us.
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: She's used to it, rolling her eyes like that, are
• 2:44
  Speaker 4: we here already?
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: She gets paid?
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Okay, I beg to do anyway. Anyway, So I rode
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: the electric bike down and what I do is I
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: don't ring this.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: Place to order.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: I go down order because they do beers on tap,
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: and I have a beer away for the food.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like my little escape. Yeah.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: Nice, it's a little bit of metime. Fill my cup up,
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: as one would say. But anyway, I pulled up yesterday
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: my electric bike. I went, I ordered, got a beer,
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: sat near the door near my electric bike. I'm sitting
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: there mine my own business, and the lady come up
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: behind me and said, your food's ready and handed me
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: the food was in an Uber Eats bag.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: I picked it up.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: I walked over to my bike, sat on my bike,
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: and this guy leans over and he goes, have you
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: run out of content ideas?
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: Have you?
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: And I was like what he was like, are you
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: drive an Uber now? Because I'm holding it over eats back.
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: I thought what you were going to say is that
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: because you had an e bike, the woman thought you
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: were an Uber driver.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she does know that. She handed some delivery.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, no no, she handed me the bag.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: But a fellow patron of the restaurant leaned over to
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: me and said, have you run out of content ideas?
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: And he was a delightful two doting dad's listen.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So if you are listening, thank you for that.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: It was very funny and very comedically timed.
• 4:05
  Speaker 3: Do you remember his name?
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: No, i'd even ask.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: I just was like, fuck you, Just so you know,
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: I am not out of content ideas, and I don't
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: ride Uber to make ends meet.
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: And if you do, there's nothing wrong with that.
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: There isn't no, there isn't anything wrong with that. Just
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: so the general public. No, I don't drive for Uber.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: Unfortunately, if you were looking forward to receiving your delicious
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: tacos with hat show myself. I'm delivered by Ash, it
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: won't be happening. Hey, I have something that I wanted
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: to ask you, because when we're recording this, it's a Wednesday.
• 4:40
  Speaker 4: We're doing this in advance everyone, But in terms of
• 4:43
  Speaker 4: timing and what's happening in the world, tomorrow is a
• 4:46
  Speaker 4: very big day in both of our households, and that
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: is because Oscar is starting school and Marley is starting school.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: How are you feeling about it?
• 4:53
  Speaker 4: I should ask how Oscar's feeling about it, because I
• 4:55
  Speaker 4: know it's big for him, but I also think it's
• 4:57
  Speaker 4: it's like such a huge day in the life of
• 4:59
  Speaker 4: a for the first time that your kid's going to school.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, look, I was just really excited he's got I mean,
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: I think he'll be really excited, really excited tomorrow morning
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: when he's in the uniform, he's got his school backpack on,
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: cry school hat on, and do you know what also
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: is he's going to the same school I went to.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: So it's a bit surreal in that way. I haven't
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: I think tomorrow I'll be a bit more emotional about it.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: I haven't really put a lot of pressure on it
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: because I'm like, because that would just put pressure on him.
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: I thought you were about to say you hadn't put
• 5:41
  Speaker 4: much thought into it, and I was like, well, I
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: don't surprise me.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: Thanks, No, I put a lot of thought into it.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just I haven't openly shown a lot of
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: pressure about the whole situation because I don't want him
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: to feel any more pressure on him because he's only
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: a little boy, and I think it'd be really good
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: for him. He needs it, he needs the learning he needs.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: Like Marley, like they're quite they're quite sponges. I mean,
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Lola and Macy a bit different. Always, yeah, the first kids,
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: Like I'm feeling tomorrow after he's off, and maybe after
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: we pick him up tomorrow, then I'll be like, you know,
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: I'll probably be able to decompress a bit about it.
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: We I mean, firstly, it's a big thing because Matt's
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: not here right so like and for Marley, she is
• 6:32
  Speaker 4: like such a little clone of Matt, Like there's such
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: their buddies. They do everything together. And I definitely think
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: that she's feeling it that Matt's not here in different ways.
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: She doesn't how to communicate it, but she she it
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: makes her sad, you know, and he'd be so gutted,
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: he would be.
• 6:47
  Speaker 3: So gut it completely.
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: But when it comes to Marley starting school tomorrow, so
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: many things, Like Matt's usually the organizer in our household. Yeah,
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: he's the one that would organize the school uniforms. He's
• 6:56
  Speaker 4: the one that would like book in for the after
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: school activities, like stuff that normally gets done by him.
• 7:01
  Speaker 4: I find myself doing and I'm not very good with
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: the life admin side of things. So even yesterday I
• 7:07
  Speaker 4: bought their school unif her school uniform ages ago. But
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: the uniform shop is closed and the only time it's
• 7:13
  Speaker 4: open is during the same duration that I'm at work,
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: so it's impossible.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: Eight till eleven or something else.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: Only open for one hour on a Wednesday, and I'm
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: in radio.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, They're like we could, Hey, you could buy you
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: could buy your kids uniform. However you need to come
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: at midnight between twelve and twelve oh one, and you
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: have to bring cash but not Australian currency. They make
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: it so hard, so hard. Yesterday I was like, Ape
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: was like, we need to just go by the school
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: and quickly grab something else. And I was like, okay,
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: no worries and she was like, ah, they're closed.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: I was like, oh okay. She was like yeah, they're
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: only open tween eleven and eleven oh.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: Five, I'm like, fuck hell, they let certain people in.
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: Also, can we just say, like to all the parents
• 7:54
  Speaker 4: out there, who are the actual P and C committees
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: who run these things? Because no one's getting paid for
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: doing this stuff. So that's why that the opening hours
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: are so terrible. Lunch break, you're good people, better than
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: us anyway. Yeah, so Marley up until today, the day
• 8:10
  Speaker 4: before school, did not have a backpack, It did not
• 8:12
  Speaker 4: have her school hat. She's got shoes and she's got
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: to hand me down school uniform for her cousins.
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: But nothing else wrong with that, Absolutely nothing wrong with that.
• 8:20
  Speaker 4: But there was something that felt really and miss sending
• 8:22
  Speaker 4: my kid to school without her dad and without like
• 8:25
  Speaker 4: two very important pieces of the uniform and my message
• 8:29
  Speaker 4: because there is this insane WhatsApp group now that's happening
• 8:32
  Speaker 4: with all of the parents.
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, kill me. I don't hate that.
• 8:35
  Speaker 4: There is a hundred, one hundred people in a group chat.
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: Parents said in her group chat, it's the whole year.
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: I've never been in a more robust group chat in
• 8:46
  Speaker 4: my life. And every day it's like who's kids doing soccer?
• 8:49
  Speaker 4: Who's kids doing ballet? Whose kids doing it? And I'm like,
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: I can't wait.
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: I do.
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: I genuinely can't wait to meet them all. I hope
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: maybe some of your listeners. But I'm a I'm a
• 8:59
  Speaker 4: group chat mute.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Usually yeah, I'm like five people in a group chat.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: I'm like, this is a good number if I if
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: someone invites me to a group chat, there's got more
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: than five people in it. The next thing that comes
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: up on that group chat is ashes removed, has left
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: the group. I've left the group and I don't care.
• 9:15
  Speaker 4: No, do you know what we're taking the piece? But
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: I will say this, it was the first time that
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: actually it really came in handy because there was I
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: was like, oh, I have a question about school.
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: I don't have any uniform.
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: I was I can ask the brains trust.
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: So I messaged the massive WhatsApp group and I was like, hey, guys,
• 9:32
  Speaker 4: I'm in a bit of a pickle. I don't actually
• 9:34
  Speaker 4: have any of the stuff that I need. And so
• 9:37
  Speaker 4: many other parents were like, oh my god. Asks either
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: like and then other parents were like, don't worry about
• 9:41
  Speaker 4: You could send your kid in a sequin gown and
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: they wouldn't care.
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: At that school, they don't worry about it.
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: So it made me feel heaps better and I was like, Okay,
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: maybe this, maybe this group chat thing was less.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: Everyone's as useless as me. It's it is a lot,
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: it's a lot.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: I didn't do any of it, So you're one has
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: step ahead of me because April is our admin person.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm doing everything without April. The castle falls down.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: It's like, I know that there was all this stuff
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: that you had to buy for your kids, but also
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: for the classroom as well.
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: In certain instances.
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: Ash has not read a single form. I know that
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: there's stuff that you need for school. I remember going
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: once and I think I had a ruler.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, one of those flop ones.
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: It doesn't break, so I well, I don't know. Apparently
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: at the school that Marla's going to, you don't need
• 10:28
  Speaker 4: to take any stuff except for uniforms and you send
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: them school.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: Like I use these gold pens.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: She's going to stay, Like, what's what's for lunch?
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: Cavia, lobster, the usual. She's got a private chef. Yeah,
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: they've got a chef. Shut up.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: She's gone to public school too, and we had like
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: it was like a like a I had to buy tissues.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: For the classroom and do you know what?
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: And that's fine because they're public schools and I'm happy
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: to do that, but I know some parents can't afford that,
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: sort of like can't afford the cost of living.
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: Look at me pretending like I care about everyone else.
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: Ash ash every week you do your dandas to get
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: yourself cancer.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: And still here. It's to me. People expect it out
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: of my man, They really do, they do.
• 11:21
  Speaker 4: Look, I think one big thing I want to say
• 11:22
  Speaker 4: though about this, because like I would have loved to
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: have been able to do this record after we'd taken
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: them to school, like I know exactly like how they
• 11:29
  Speaker 4: reacted and everything else. But there's part of me that
• 11:31
  Speaker 4: feels way more emotional thinking about it than I thought
• 11:35
  Speaker 4: I would. And I and I think that part of
• 11:37
  Speaker 4: that is because I think back on when I was
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: in primary school and imagining how big everything felt, like
• 11:44
  Speaker 4: that school becomes the center of your world. The friends
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: that you have at that school become the center of
• 11:49
  Speaker 4: your world, Like the little crush you have on that
• 11:51
  Speaker 4: boy that actually doesn't matter in the loring run. You
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: think that that's like the most important thing. And and
• 11:56
  Speaker 4: I guess like for me knowing that like Mally's gonna
• 11:59
  Speaker 4: have those experience is in school and she's going to
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: have to like figure out what it is to socialize
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: with real friends and to have friendship breakups and all
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: that sort of stuff.
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: This is the start of that And that's a lot
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: to think.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: About it like that, and it just reminds me of
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: like I have. I have thought about it like this
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: a little bit as well, Like I've thought about like
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: the experiences and the emotions that I had.
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah, like think about the first girl you had a
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: crush on in primary school April.
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: No, it made me think about because it's the start
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: of term and I was a one of those kids
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: that used to cry every term at the start.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: So plus, yeah.
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: That wasn't me. I was like, get me out of
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: my house and go back to school.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: But it made me think about how I felt because
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: I used to walk to the same school, the same
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: primary school. My mum used to walk me. She used
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: to get the bus from out the front of the
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: school and go into the city. And you know, two
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: working parents. I barely saw them really, but like it may,
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I remember going back to school every term right up
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: until I went to high school and I would.
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: Cry, Oh, that breaks my heart, thank you.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: And it makes me think, like Oscar's got gonna have
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: those feelings of what I felt going to and I
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: can't really remember what those feelings were, but I think
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to be home with my mom.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: I think I just wanted to be home with my parents.
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: But I look at him now and I'm like, you're
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: going to have those feelings, and it does scare me
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: a little bit, because you're right, everything about what's going
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: to happen from tomorrow is going to shape the person they're.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: Going to become. The friend.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: Like, yes, he's going with his friends, which is great,
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: but there's so much of the unknown that he doesn't
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: know yet that's coming tomorrow.
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: And there's also no way of explaining to a kid that, like,
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: none of this stuff is going to matter when you're
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: twenty or you're thirty. Absolutely, but it is the biggest
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: thing that happens to them. And you know, and I
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: just think about like girls that were mean to me,
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: all things that happened, and at the time, it was
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: absolutely soul destroyingly devastating.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's.
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: Because it's everything.
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: It's a whole world and I think the thing that
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: makes me emotional is like I fear for Maley having
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: those feelings and not being able to fix it, and
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: also knowing that I can't fix it, and I shouldn't
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: fix it because that's like the essence of resilience building
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: exactly right.
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: But I want to fix it. I don't want it
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: to feel that way.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: I don't want You don't want to put your kids
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: in a position where they're going to have to feel
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: those big those feelings that when you were a kid
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: now and as an adult, when you look back and
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: you're like, the embarrassing things you did, the little bits
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: and pieces that you did that you look back that
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: sort of sit in your mind subconsciously, that a little
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: bit traumatic in a way.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: You don't want them to feel that.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: You're like, I want everything to be happy for you,
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: want everything to be But it's you're right, it's so
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: good for them to like experience the sadness of having
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: to go back to school, because then you're like, I
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: appreciate the other things outside of.
• 15:01
  Speaker 4: It, maybe, and they also all need to embarrass themselves,
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: like a talent show or something like that's just the
• 15:06
  Speaker 4: first day.
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: It's a bride of passage. We've all been there.
• 15:09
  Speaker 4: I once stood on stage and sung Tears on my
• 15:12
  Speaker 4: Pillow by Celindion.
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: And did big arm actions, and then.
• 15:15
  Speaker 4: I got bullied for an entire year for it because
• 15:18
  Speaker 4: I fucking deserved it, to be honest, that is good gear.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: Years on my pillow, that's great pain.
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: And I was in year three in my heart God
• 15:28
  Speaker 4: like you Sorr.
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: You just lost a whole lot of subscribers.
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: Then, sorry, I remember, and I've told this story on
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: the pot I think before where one of the teachers
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: created it because there was always like dance class and
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: stuff like promise you. So they decided that they wanted
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: to have an all boys dance class. So me and
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: all my friends joined, and then we got bullied for
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: it and we all quit. We quit the boy band.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: The teacher cried so and now I look back back
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: then I was like, but now I'm like, oh no,
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: because she was like this is something back then would
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: have been like, this is an all boys dance class.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: It's cool. This is cool, man done something think of
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: like Backstreet Boys.
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: You were that actually screams that you were living out
• 16:15
  Speaker 4: her dream.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: Not yours. That's what that's And then we all went.
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: We all got bullied for it, and we're like.
• 16:20
  Speaker 3: Oh, that sounds like a teacher that has attachment issues.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: This issue is just like it's like mister g oh
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: Summer high TI.
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was like she was like that.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: She was like, you've got like a professional quality at
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: a teacher's price.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: And then she's like, I've got an all boys dance crew.
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: Oh wait.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: They all just quit and she cried and I felt
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: horrible about it, but like we all got bullied for that.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: Still when I bring it up, the other bullied for it.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: I'm still forty. We're talking about forty old? Are you me?
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: It's a secret thirty five? I'm thirty five this year?
• 16:56
  Speaker 4: Are you you are a baby?
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: Fuck? This one shits me. People are like thirty six
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: and they're like.
• 17:03
  Speaker 4: Oh, you're just a little boby, little boby, we should
• 17:08
  Speaker 4: be talking about you as a child.
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: Look a little baby baby. I'm starting to sweat.
• 17:13
  Speaker 3: I'm thirty nine.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: In a couple of weeks, I know. April asked me
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: and she was like, how was Laura. I was like.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: Old, she's fast dust, She's that old.
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: Literally, yeah, everything's got a pension guard. Everything creaks. Now
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: my back hurts, but for no reason. I like hurt
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: my ribs.
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: It's just because I've sneezed.
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but you sleep wrong?
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah well that no, that's actually happens. My shoulders heard
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: every night from sleeping. But that's a whole other story. Okay,
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: look something else. Getting away from the kids and stop.
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: What did you get the backpack? And do you get
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: the hat? I think so?
• 17:51
  Speaker 3: I think I think that Annie Kate went and picked
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: him up.
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: Matts sister.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: She Everyone was like Molly can't go to school without
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: these things. Yeah, because people rallied.
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what, It's like I've experienced with Oscar
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: before where in terms of inclusivity. So I think we
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: went to like rugby training once and it was it
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: was like the first rugby training when no one had
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: any kid, blah blah blah. I think maybe we were
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: a week It might have been a week late because
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: we were away and we went to the first training
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: with Oscar and he was just in normal clothes and
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: everyone was in their kid stuff and their kid and
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: it broke him. And I felt horrible not to put
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: any pressure on you.
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: But it's good, like I said, resilience building. If she
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: goes there with her Gabby dollhouse backpack. She's going to
• 18:35
  Speaker 4: either be like I stand out on I'm a star,
• 18:37
  Speaker 4: or she's going to be like, Okay, this is a hurdle.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: This is going to be one of those things that
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: he hid in the bathroom. And look, it doesn't kill you,
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: make too strong exactly, and.
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: Like he's never been the same, but he's fine. He recovered,
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: all right.
• 19:01
  Speaker 4: I did want to talk to you about something that
• 19:03
  Speaker 4: I know has been really upsetting for you lately. We've
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: been talking about it in group chats. Oh yeah, the
• 19:08
  Speaker 4: Australian media has been talking about it, and if anything,
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: I'm worried about the future of this podcast to be honest.
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Look, I don't know if you should be worried
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: for me. Are worried for Matt, because I've reached worried
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: for me, I've reached out. No, I don't worry about you.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: I've reached out to all the other lifeguards on Bondai
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: Rescue and now we're all chummy.
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: Have you really?
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm just getting some backup after that reeks of desperation.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: Don't know, I'm just out of BONDI going.
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: So if you don't know what we're talking about.
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: Obviously, Matt being on I'm a Celebrity, he has striped
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: up quite a romance with Harrison, who is one of
• 19:47
  Speaker 4: the lifeguards from Bondai Rescue.
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: They've called themselves Marison. I think that just sucks.
• 19:53
  Speaker 4: I got the instant dick for my own husband, Marathon.
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: Surely we go out with something other than that.
• 19:58
  Speaker 4: So we had to do these. Sandra Sully comes on.
• 20:01
  Speaker 4: So if you haven't watched IM a celeb or a
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: whole season before, about three quarters of the way through,
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: so I would say any day now, Sandra Sully comes
• 20:08
  Speaker 4: on with this like news from Home segment.
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, so.
• 20:11
  Speaker 4: Like she'll read out letters from loved ones or she'll
• 20:14
  Speaker 4: show photos from loved ones. No one called me for
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: all the big things that they're miss You picked her
• 20:19
  Speaker 4: on the emails.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: You didn't get that email. I'm not on an email.
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: I would something, okay, So like news from Home, right,
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: and my My news from Home was like some things
• 20:30
  Speaker 4: were funny, some things that were obviously nice and sentimental,
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: like Lola had her fourth birthday, and then at the
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: end of it, I was like, Harrison, stop.
• 20:36
  Speaker 3: Cutting my grass.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: I was like, I really hope they include that stop
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: cutting my grass more like it.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: My mother in law yesterday said to me, she was like,
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: how do you feel about it?
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: And I'm like what she was like, She's like.
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: Oh, we love a bromance and it's it's a it's
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: a good move.
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: It is a good it is a good move.
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: Australia does love a bro mat I love it.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: And look, I'm on it seems like a nice guy.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: I's got no kids, so it's got no life experience.
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: I'm not bitter at all.
• 21:06
  Speaker 4: That's not two things that, to be fair, I think
• 21:09
  Speaker 4: I would normally find them really funny.
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: I found one of them quite funny. But one of them,
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: I was.
• 21:12
  Speaker 4: Like, that made me kind of annoyed at you what.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: Because I know, I know, are you watching math?
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: It's it's not it's not my husband.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: No.
• 21:26
  Speaker 3: So there's been two things that he's done.
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: The first thing, and let me put this in perspective,
• 21:32
  Speaker 4: I am very sensitive because I'm on my own at
• 21:36
  Speaker 4: the moment, like I'm doing everything with the kids and
• 21:39
  Speaker 4: managing multiple like I'm.
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: Managing a renovation, like but I'm doing a lot.
• 21:45
  Speaker 4: I'm doing a lot of Plus I'm also managing his
• 21:47
  Speaker 4: social media, like, I can't be doing.
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: Any more recording podcast? What else am I doing? You
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: might as well just be him too.
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: So I'm doing a lot of stuff for him to
• 21:58
  Speaker 4: support him.
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: Can I just say one thing, you do a great job, thanks,
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: as that's what I needed all Listen's going to love that.
• 22:03
  Speaker 4: See everyone, Ash's got a heart. So there was this
• 22:08
  Speaker 4: joke around and it was kind of like a like
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: a trivia how well do you know your camp mates?
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: And so it was a question this or that and
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: there and the rest of the camp mates had to
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: guess what they thought the person who had been asked
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: the question would guess. So, for example, Matt went into
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: a room and he his question was, if you won
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: a holiday to Bali, who would you take your wife?
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: Or Harrison hilarious.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: Hilarious, I can take a joke.
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: Would have found that very funny had I not had
• 22:37
  Speaker 4: a really hard day with the kids. So he came
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: out and was like, all very funny, ha ha. The
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: stupid thing though, is like the camp mates were objectively like, Okay,
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: how would he really answer this? Like what's the honest answer?
• 22:48
  Speaker 4: What would any normal husband write down? And they wrote
• 22:51
  Speaker 4: down Laura Oh, you take your mates and then stands
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: there and he's like, I know that this is going
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: to piss off Laura.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: He also said some zings. He's like, I know that
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: this upset her.
• 23:00
  Speaker 4: He's like, but I'm taking And the grand reveal was
• 23:03
  Speaker 4: Harrison and everyone who was because I was watching with
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: Falcon and a couple of Matt's really good friends, and
• 23:07
  Speaker 4: everyone was like so funny, and I just could feel
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: the lack of laughter on my face. I was watching
• 23:14
  Speaker 4: the TV like stoneface. I can't fucking wait to go
• 23:17
  Speaker 4: on a Bali girls trip and you're not coming, And
• 23:19
  Speaker 4: that's the first thing I'm going to do when you
• 23:21
  Speaker 4: get home. And then the second thing he said recently
• 23:23
  Speaker 4: was that he'd rather eat a mango than have sex
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: with me live on National TV.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: So that's okay.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: This is what I wanted to ask you because I
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: have been in and out watching.
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: I've got a laugh too.
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: You're not a dedicated viewer.
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: No, it's the ads man, it kills you.
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: And also that's a ADHD sit through an Adverbs.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: Also went to have an ADHD appointment today stood me up,
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: which is.
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: So annoying because I mean, you being organized is part
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: of the thing like, yeah, I was.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: It was a telehealth and it was like, you're in
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: the lobby and I was like, it's been thirty minutes.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: You need to check that you actually got the time right? No,
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: I did. I figured it that But was your mistake
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: there's mine?
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, that was a true question.
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: It was theirs.
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: You shouldn't even have to go for the diagnoses, like
• 24:12
  Speaker 4: you should just be like I missed the appointment because
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: I was disorganized.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: It was in it and I was like to Apral'm
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: like I've been in this virtual lobby for like fifteen
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: twenty minutes. She's like, maybe this is the test. It
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: is and forty minutes. Anyway, I got a call from them.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: I fixed it anyway, just skewed us off track there. Sorry,
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: what was I saying? Yeah, I can't I can't. Yeah,
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: I can't sit through that long of anything, like I
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: cannot do it.
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: We know, Oh, okay, just just check it. I can't
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: stop fidgiting with things anyway.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: And I missed the Mango thing and I forgot to
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: ask our producer, yes, what it meant?
• 24:49
  Speaker 4: So the Mango for anyone who did miss it and
• 24:51
  Speaker 4: may have seen that, I'd post it on Mat Stories
• 24:53
  Speaker 4: I was on his grid, was that basically they've split
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: the team now, so it's women verse men.
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: The men won the challenge that the men got.
• 25:02
  Speaker 4: The food that night, and the food was steak and vegetables,
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: and then for dessert, the dessert is like the elite dessert.
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: They got a mango or multiple mangoes.
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: Right, that's pretty good.
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: And the women's team were obviously super upset by it
• 25:14
  Speaker 4: because they were starving having rice.
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: And horrible beans.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: She's got some.
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: The beans are so flavorless because there's no salt, there's
• 25:21
  Speaker 4: no nothing. And the boys had like the best meal ever.
• 25:24
  Speaker 4: And so Matt's sitting there and he's like eating the
• 25:26
  Speaker 4: mango and he goes, I know, I shouldn't say this
• 25:28
  Speaker 4: out loud, and he's like, then then says it a
• 25:31
  Speaker 4: completely normal volume. He's like, I shouldn't say this out loud,
• 25:33
  Speaker 4: but I'm going to say it so that everybody hears.
• 25:35
  Speaker 4: He's like, if I had the choice between having sex
• 25:38
  Speaker 4: with my wife and eating this mango, I would choose
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: this mango.
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: That's fair. I think that's fair.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: Same to be honest, fair, Yeah, I think if April
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: was like, either you can have sex with me, or
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: you can eat this delicious mango?
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: Oh can you color up for me?
• 26:00
  Speaker 3: But can you do it with the little lines?
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Look, I mean I saw that was just in
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: the moment. Yeah.
• 26:08
  Speaker 4: And do you know what's funny is that the producers
• 26:10
  Speaker 4: so like I get emails most days from like different
• 26:13
  Speaker 4: producers to tell me and update me on things because
• 26:15
  Speaker 4: I can't speak to him, but I do get bits
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: of updates, and every day it's almost like they're just
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: reassuring me that he does actually miss me, because every
• 26:22
  Speaker 4: day they're like, I know it didn't make it onto
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: the show, but he talks about you and the girls
• 26:25
  Speaker 4: all the time. Just just want you to know how
• 26:28
  Speaker 4: much he loves you and adores you. And I was like,
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: thanks for that, because what you're showing doesn't really reply.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: I'm a bit but hurt the mango.
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: Just maybe one sentimental moment we can have anything at all.
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: I'm just jealous of a fucking mango and Harrison at
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: this point And yeah, exactly, me too. Actually, did I
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: tell you? Did I tell you? My sister was like, hey,
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: are you holding up to me?
• 26:49
  Speaker 4: It's because everybody is worried that the absolute wheels fall
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: off this wagon without mad here, they're like.
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: Fucking Ash on his arm.
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: No, she was like, you pretty much were inseparable for
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: two years and then now you can't have in con him,
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: And that's what it was.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: That's what it's like. It must be for you for years,
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: and then now you carr contact him.
• 27:05
  Speaker 4: Yes, except Ash. I have children with him, so doesn't matter.
• 27:10
  Speaker 4: Speaking of my children. There's one other thing I wanted
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: to tell you.
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: So Lola, Lola has.
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: I don't know how to describe her.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: I know that you guys have.
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: Talked about Lola a lot on the show, obviously, like
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: she is a unique little character.
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: She is full of personality.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: How did you describe her on your podcost I called.
• 27:30
  Speaker 3: Her the personality higher of our family.
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: But I think that that actually might be quite offensive
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: and maybe no, it's not the way I meant it
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: to be.
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: She's just so annoying.
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: No, she's so funny.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: She is very funny.
• 27:42
  Speaker 4: She's just like so different to any other kid I've
• 27:45
  Speaker 4: ever met.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: You never know, and I noticed this with Lola from
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: the outside looking in, And look, I think I have
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: a pretty good relationship with Lola.
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: I'm like Matt, you don't know what face she's going
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: to pull at you.
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: When she looks at you, you have no idea what
• 27:57
  Speaker 4: you're going to get, what you're going to get.
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: To me, she is quite consistent normally because she has
• 28:02
  Speaker 4: matt to hate. But I just get like the most.
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: I don't even know how to describe it. Like, so,
• 28:07
  Speaker 4: for example, when I leave for work in the morning,
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: she'll be like, Mommy, kiss me, and I get like
• 28:11
  Speaker 4: this routine of kisses, right, this is how she says
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: goodbye to me every day. And she's very specific about
• 28:16
  Speaker 4: little things. But she'll kiss me on the lips. Then
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: she'll kiss me on this cheek, kiss me on this cheek,
• 28:20
  Speaker 4: kiss me here on the nose, kiss me here on
• 28:21
  Speaker 4: the head, kiss each ear.
• 28:23
  Speaker 3: Then she'll go back and do that whole rotation again.
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: Then she'll say I have to hug you twice, and
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: so then she hugs me twice, and then I'll be out.
• 28:29
  Speaker 3: The door and she'll be like one.
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: More time, one more time.
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: And she just is a genuinely a very sweet and
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: funny kid. And she has very big feelings, and I
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: think it's because she can't and doesn't know how to
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: control them more communicate them properly, yet that sometimes they overflow,
• 28:46
  Speaker 4: and that's what Matt often cops. The problem is is
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: that there's no one else for her to direct that
• 28:50
  Speaker 4: at at the moment, So it is one hundred percent
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: all love for me and all hate for me. Like
• 28:54
  Speaker 4: I'm getting everything at the moment.
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: Happy, she's four now.
• 28:59
  Speaker 4: Everyone who the Lola? So she knows she can't hit me, right.
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: We've had many conversations about it because often when she
• 29:08
  Speaker 4: gets so like, you know, upper level in terms of
• 29:11
  Speaker 4: like her anger or energy, the only way that she
• 29:15
  Speaker 4: kind of.
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: Like explodes is that she starts hitting.
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: She either hits her sister or she hits me, and
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: she really really hits now, like she's quite a big little.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: Mate. It really big wind up from across the room.
• 29:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so she she hit me so hard in the face.
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: There was when I was talking about do you remember
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: the other week? I was mentioning how she hit me
• 29:30
  Speaker 4: in the face. So we had some big chats about that.
• 29:34
  Speaker 4: She hasn't hit me since, but oh god, and oh.
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: Is it a butt? So she what she hits? So
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: now she goes to.
• 29:45
  Speaker 4: Hit me, and I'm like, you're not allowed to hit me, Lola,
• 29:46
  Speaker 4: Like with stern voice, and she gets so enraged by
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: the fact that she can't hit me and wants to
• 29:52
  Speaker 4: that she goes da and then she'll turn around, grab
• 29:56
  Speaker 4: her butt cheeks and just moon me, just full cheek
• 30:01
  Speaker 4: moon just and screaming whilst whilst I have an angry
• 30:04
  Speaker 4: little buttthole staring at me, and she'll full moon me
• 30:08
  Speaker 4: with the most aggressive moon you have ever seen a
• 30:10
  Speaker 4: toddler do.
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: How is that now?
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: Her?
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: Like coping?
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: Megan is and I don't know, I don't know how
• 30:17
  Speaker 4: we've got here in public? She only does it at home,
• 30:20
  Speaker 4: and it's because she's often naked, so like she never
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: wears clothes this kid, and I notice that she's always naked.
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: But even when she is not naked, she'll like, ah.
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: They try to rip her shirt off, RiPP her pants
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: down quick quick. I got to get my butt out.
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: I'm so angry. What the coping mechanisms to moon me?
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: It's like a way of it's definitely her way of,
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: like I'm going to act out even more.
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: What do I need to do? Skin? Skin?
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: But I can't react to it, so like I can't.
• 30:53
  Speaker 4: It's actually really hard because I want to laugh, but
• 30:56
  Speaker 4: I can't do anything, because I think if I get
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: annoyed at her or I react in anyway, she will
• 31:01
  Speaker 4: just in her head be like, oh cool, that's working.
• 31:02
  Speaker 3: I'll keep doing that.
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Well it's funny. So that's it.
• 31:07
  Speaker 3: That's where we're at now.
• 31:08
  Speaker 4: Now we've gone from her hitting me to her full
• 31:10
  Speaker 4: blown mooning me.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: I think every improvement, do you think?
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know what I prefer I'm not going
• 31:16
  Speaker 3: back to hitting me.
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: Can you stop that? Can you just hit me with
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: everything you've got? Please? If you could put more clothes
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: on and then hit me, that'd be great, preferently in
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: the eye, so I never have to see that again.
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: That's good, that's good anyway.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: My look, I think the naked thing is a second
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: child thing, and it like Macy.
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: They just don't give a fuck. Yeah, they don't care, they.
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: Don't feel embarrassment, they don't feel anything.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Macy has tried to be more helpful around the house.
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: I would say she doesn't really get angry. She's she's
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: very much at the moment where she talks back a
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: lot because I just don't think she gets it. It's infuriating.
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: What is she saying?
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: Just no, she drives furiates me. I'm like, Macy, can
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: you move now?
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: Fucking hell? Fuck me.
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: But she started to try and be more healthful around
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: the house, which is great. So she'll take things to
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: the bin. She'll put things back like where she thinks
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: that they go.
• 32:17
  Speaker 4: That's kind of handy. Didn't get her to do stuff. Yeah,
• 32:20
  Speaker 4: take your nappy to the bin and then they do it.
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: Do you find the nappy like in your bed?
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: Oh fucking well, Like, I'll get out of the bed,
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: I'll roll over and I'll roll into a fucking nappy
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: from the night before. I'm like, oh Jesus.
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: But she blamed Macie because you left a.
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: Nappy in the bed, and I'm blaming her, blaming the
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: three year old. But she she's gotten so helpful. The
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: other day, I went and got into the shower.
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: It's not a rare occurrence. I shower every day, so
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: you know, thank you.
• 32:47
  Speaker 3: I'm proud of you.
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: And she's learned how to open the door because April,
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: she always walks in on April in the shower.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: But she walked in on me to be helpful.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: She rang, I left my phone in the lounge room,
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: and she thought that I might need it in the shower.
• 33:02
  Speaker 3: Because you're always on your phone.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: No, she just thought that's it just belonged to I
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: suppose it belongs in my hand.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: Damn. Anyway, she actually walked in, she was like, dade it.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: I was like, move the shower curtain and I was like, yeah,
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: like what's up. She's like, here you go.
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: She's like, you left your phone and I'm like, oh,
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: Like how do I get angry with her? She's trying
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: to be helpful. I'm like, not not in the shower.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: She's like no, no, no, here go, and she won't take
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: no for an answer. So I'm standing there in the
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: shower holding my phone.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: The shower's on, and I.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: Was like to Able, I'm like April, it's like what
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: Maces like, okay, bye, and just like left me with
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: the phone in the shower and Abril just pokes it
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: everyd of the corn and she goes, I'll give it here,
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: take my phone.
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: My phone's drench.
• 33:48
  Speaker 3: I think it's I like this age.
• 33:50
  Speaker 4: I like the age because you can use it to
• 33:52
  Speaker 4: your advantage, Like it is helpful when you can call
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: out to your kid and they bring you things.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: You're like toilet paper. Yes, yes, that's the only reason
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: I had kids. There, I said it that wow.
• 34:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and also now you never have to be without
• 34:07
  Speaker 4: your phone, thanks Mabee.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: She's actually waterlogged and water Cameron doesn't work anymore.
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: Thanks.
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: But I you know, when she was doing and I
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: was like, oh, you do that thing where you go, oh,
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: thank you, like you want to encourage them being helpful
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: even though they're not.
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: They're actually costing me thousands of dollars for pretty much.
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: The toilet paper one is really good, because yeah, I
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: used to be like April out a toilet paper and
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: she'd be like, oh half and puff and grunt and
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: carry on to make me feel bad about shitting.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: Everyone shits. But then I'll be like, may see or
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: Oskar He's like, yeah.
• 34:43
  Speaker 4: The problem with asking a kid though, is then they
• 34:45
  Speaker 4: come into the bathroom and they never leave.
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: In the middle of doing a pol folds his arm,
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: leans on the world. Yes, what did you doing? That
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: was me this morning.
• 34:53
  Speaker 4: I was trying to do a bo when Molly came
• 34:54
  Speaker 4: in and wanted to tell me about her dream, and
• 34:55
  Speaker 4: I was like, let's have a chat.
• 34:57
  Speaker 3: Girlfriend.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: She just sat on the floor in front of me
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: and we had let's spill some tea.
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: There's nowhere else to go kill some tea where you
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: drop off some pook. Totally, that's exactly how it happened.
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: April.
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: Also, the kids like always go like, they don't walk
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: in on me and the toilet because I think, but
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: they always.
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: I always I walk past.
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: The toilet and the doors open, and April's there doing
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: a week and I'm like, what are you doing? She's like,
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: I just thought it'd be easy if I just left
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: the door open. I'm like, why she's given up.
• 35:22
  Speaker 4: They're gonna come in, and she's given up because she
• 35:25
  Speaker 4: knows exactly how this goes down.
• 35:26
  Speaker 3: That's what that is.
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: You can't see my toilet unless you're literally walking down
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: the hallway.
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: And then you're like, you.
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: Have your own toilets?
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: No? No, no, like, no, fuck off. How many bathrooms
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: you got?
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: We live in a palace. Yeah, that's right. The castle
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: has like twelve bathrooms. Once for mummy, which is Ellie, once.
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: For Matthew, it's my husband, shut up, I'm the kids,
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: and then there's the sweet that's mine.
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: So mine. Do we have any questions? No, hang on,
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: I'm finished. Get to the barb fucking fish boy, don't
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: rush me anyway? What was I saying?
• 36:04
  Speaker 3: I don't know something about doing a ship and your
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: kids watching?
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: Oh no, I always come around the corner. Well, I
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: come around the corner and April's on the toll and I'm.
• 36:11
  Speaker 4: Like you as then it scares you that she's on
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: the loop because I was like, shut the door.
• 36:18
  Speaker 3: None, But then we're a door open family. I don't care.
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: So okay, if April is taking a ship with the
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: door open, that's that's a no for me.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: But doing away fine. The other day.
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: The other day she was doing away the door open,
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: and I made a laugh and she fired.
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: Into a bow''t want this anyway? I don't care. Let's
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: get into some listener question.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: Should we were moving on that quick? Whose podcast isn't there?
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: We're going to sit here all day and talk about ship.
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: We started with ship and we're ending the ship. Okay,
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: this is from Harley.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: Harley, don't try all right, let me it is.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: Harley says, we just found out we are having twins.
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: Damn can right?
• 37:04
  Speaker 3: No double the fun.
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: No, We're already have a nearly two year old, so
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: we'll have three under three. Any tips with twins do
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: you know who had a similar situation to this, a
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: woman named Tigan Natoli.
• 37:19
  Speaker 4: She had basically had one child and then had no twins,
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: and then one or one and then twins.
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: It must have been one of them twins, because like
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: if you had twins and like I got two, then
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: like why would you have your third? No.
• 37:30
  Speaker 4: I think she like accidentally got pregnant, like literally was
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: in postpartum and accidentally got pregnant, like very very shortly afterwards. No,
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: But there's what I mean is is And the reason
• 37:40
  Speaker 4: why I'm bringing her up is because it might be
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: nice now for you to seek out people who are
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: on social media who have been in similar situations.
• 37:47
  Speaker 3: And she's talked about it a lot.
• 37:49
  Speaker 4: She works for Mama Mia, who's a competing podcast, but
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: she works for them and has done a lot of
• 37:54
  Speaker 4: write ups around what it was to parent like three
• 37:58
  Speaker 4: children under the age of two, Like what an insanity,
• 38:01
  Speaker 4: insane thing that they had to do. But they survived it,
• 38:04
  Speaker 4: and you know, they have this beautiful family and the
• 38:07
  Speaker 4: kids are now all a little bit older, and they
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: had this amazing relationship and you know, I think the
• 38:12
  Speaker 4: first few years, you don't need anyone to tell you
• 38:14
  Speaker 4: how hard that's going to be.
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: It's going to be super hard.
• 38:17
  Speaker 4: But then you're going to get to the phase of
• 38:20
  Speaker 4: when your youngest are two and they're all friends and
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: they can all bring you to all the paper at
• 38:25
  Speaker 4: the one time and genuinely like.
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: Just sit in the same time.
• 38:28
  Speaker 3: You'll all be there with a full audience to watch.
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: But the thing is is like the really really hard
• 38:34
  Speaker 4: intensity of that early parenting part, like which I don't
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: think anyone unless they've lived the experience of having twins
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: can give you advice on that is not forever. And
• 38:44
  Speaker 4: sometimes it feels like it's forever when you're in it,
• 38:46
  Speaker 4: and then you wake up one day and your kids
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: are going to school.
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: You know it just it does. It doesn't last.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: It's not not going to be hard like that, like
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: regardless whether it's one. It's like it's hard with one,
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: just like what you're doing with that one. It's just
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: going to be double.
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: Like surely there has to be like community groups on Facebook,
• 39:04
  Speaker 4: and and I think like seeking out people who are
• 39:07
  Speaker 4: in the same situation is going to be like the
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: most the most comforting thing that you can do, because
• 39:12
  Speaker 4: it's going to remind you that, Okay, you're going to
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: be all right, and you're going to get through this bit.
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: It's important to not feel to not feel that you're
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: alone in it.
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: You're the only one experiencing that.
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: And that's usually when we talk about vulnerable situations and
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: stuff like that, it's people saying I thought I was
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: the only one. So my advice, I don't have twins,
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: My advice is, yes, seek out other people just so
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: that you can feel normal, right, but also like give
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: yourselves a break as intense as it's going to be
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: just checking with each other all the time. Yeah, because
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: it's going to be intense.
• 39:44
  Speaker 4: Also, I mean, I guess like the other thing now
• 39:47
  Speaker 4: is is like you know, you're pregnant, you're having babies,
• 39:50
  Speaker 4: they're coming in nine months. It is also nine months
• 39:53
  Speaker 4: to prepare for what additional support you might have around you,
• 39:56
  Speaker 4: whether that's how other people in your life can show
• 39:58
  Speaker 4: up to help you know, whether it's grandparents or figuring
• 40:02
  Speaker 4: out daycare or does those what do those other support
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: systems look like? Because I think everyone needs to have those.
• 40:08
  Speaker 4: Usually it's not until you're in the depths of parenting
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: that you realize, fuck, I'm doing this all on my
• 40:11
  Speaker 4: own and I need some help, but I think if
• 40:14
  Speaker 4: you've got twins, it's probably going to be harder for
• 40:16
  Speaker 4: you to implement them after the fact. So like having
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: those really honest conversations with the people around you.
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: Who you might be able to lead on to see what.
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: They like, how you can navigate this period if you
• 40:27
  Speaker 4: need the help, would probably be the biggest that got
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: the biggest conversations to have now that you could, I
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: think as well, but far out Honestly, twins. I struggle
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: with having two kids really really close in age for
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: the first eighteen months, but then it came. It got
• 40:43
  Speaker 4: really good after that, but that first eighteen months was part.
• 40:46
  Speaker 4: And you know, it comes down to whether you've got
• 40:48
  Speaker 4: good sleepers or good eaters or good like you can
• 40:51
  Speaker 4: get unicorn babies akamally, and then you can get like
• 40:55
  Speaker 4: devil spawn sleepers like Lola who will only sleep if
• 40:58
  Speaker 4: they're sitting up right.
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: You know, like there's total on you.
• 41:01
  Speaker 4: There's totally different experiences of what a kid is and
• 41:04
  Speaker 4: ninety nine point nine percent of it comes down to sleeping.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: And like I said, my advice is give yourselves a
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: break and don't go so hard on yourself. If you
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: feel like you've if you feel you're in the thick
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: of it and you're doing something wrong, like just go
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: easy on yourself a little, because it's nothing worse than
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: a baby telling you you're doing the wrong thing, and
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: then you get in your own head and you're like,
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: am I do I not know how to do that?
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: It just makes it worse.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: So just give yourself an opportunity to find people in
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: like minded situations so that you don't feel alone.
• 41:31
  Speaker 4: Oh my god, I can't even imagine that moment of
• 41:33
  Speaker 4: sitting in the ultrasundroom and being like, holy shit, it's
• 41:37
  Speaker 4: twins and we have a baby at home.
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: Wild, I don't Yeah, thankfully I've had a sex with
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: me so well.
• 41:44
  Speaker 4: I mean, like, I know you love talking about it, Ash,
• 41:47
  Speaker 4: but like about and I talking about whether you're wanting
• 41:49
  Speaker 4: to get another running a third Imagine if we ended
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: up with twins and we ended up with four kids,
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: you name.
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: One of them after me?
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: No, Laura, as always, thank you for filling in the
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: void that is your husband.
• 42:05
  Speaker 3: Nobody can fill those shoes.
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: I think you did a pretty good job. Thank you.
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: And also guys like thanks. I've had some nice messages
• 42:12
  Speaker 4: from people who have listened. So I really thank you
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: to nobody for sending me meet one. So I appreciate that.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I need it for this self. A lot of
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: people have been like, oh, it's great, so see.
• 42:21
  Speaker 4: Later, matust be me, must be me, Matt Harrison, you
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: can run away again.
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: I have your own podcast.
• 42:28
  Speaker 3: No, guys, it's been a real treat. Thank you so
• 42:30
  Speaker 3: much for having me.
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: And maybe next week I'll be in the South African jungle.
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: Meant to Matt, maybe you join me.
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: But that it would be very funny. Make sure you
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: do vote.
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: You can vote up to ten times a day, although
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: a friend of mine voted twenty two times yesterday.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: Absolutely so if you haven't seen, you can go on
• 42:47
  Speaker 4: to ten play and you can vote to save Matt
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: for I'm a celebrity. Like the votes really count now.
• 42:52
  Speaker 4: But the thing is is you can keep voting and
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: then you can refresh the page and vote again. It
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: says you can only vote ten times, but I voted
• 42:59
  Speaker 4: upward of twenty times some days. You just keep voting
• 43:01
  Speaker 4: until you get a message that says you have exhausted
• 43:04
  Speaker 4: all votes. Because you might get an error message, just refrasha,
• 43:07
  Speaker 4: go again, Go.
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: Again until you see that you.
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: Have exhausted all votes message and that's it. That's great. Wow,
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: dis guys. Yeah, if you miss you as well, we
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: haven't finished yet. Sorry, you never know. Next week we
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: have Nick Cody on the on the pod who's filling
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: in for.
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: Matt and Laura that you potentially won't be here.
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: We'll find out.
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: Anyways, what a suspenseful hook that was.
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Thank you.
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: If you enjoy this episode, please leave us a review
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: five stars. If you like, leave us a little message
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: for Laura, she loves it. Otherwise, join us on socials
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: which is two learning Dad's Instagram TikTok, and of course
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: in space.
• 43:46
  Speaker 4: I think you guys still have some calendars. We're getting
• 43:48
  Speaker 4: a bit deep in the year now. Maybe we'll discount
• 43:50
  Speaker 4: them soon, but get us off get your calendars for
• 43:53
  Speaker 4: the Rauntry rant.
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: Yes, all the money goes to Rise Up, a charity
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: that helps victims and families that are by domestic violence.
• 44:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so you don't even have to use the calendar.
• 44:03
  Speaker 4: You can just cut out the pictures of Ash and
• 44:04
  Speaker 4: Matt and put them up on your wall.
• 44:07
  Speaker 2: Cute, Yeah, very cute.
• 44:09
  Speaker 3: Anyway, guys, that's it from us.
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: Thank you. Bye bye. Yeah you do.
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: I actually do podcasting, so well.
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: Back to you. You really are thank you. Can we
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: snip that up please, I'd love to keep that bit
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: you do podcasting.
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: You're a fantastic podcast so that any time like you
• 44:28
  Speaker 4: shit me, I'm like remember this.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: Sorry.
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: Two Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and torrestraight Land
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: the people's today