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Farnoosh Torabi on Why Your Home Isn't the Investment You Think It Is · Own It with Angie Hicks

• 0:00
  - What does financial independence actually look like
• 0:03
  for women and what gets in the way of it?
• 0:06
  Farnoosh Torabi grew up watching her mom defer
• 0:09
  to her dad on every financial decision,
• 0:12
  and now she's spent her career making sure
• 0:14
  other women don't have to.
• 0:16
  Farnoosh is a personal finance journalist and author
• 0:19
  and the host of the podcast, "So Money".
• 0:22
  I'm Angie Hicks, co-founder of Angie,
• 0:24
  and welcome back to Own It, where we discuss what it takes
• 0:28
  to own your home without it owning you.
• 0:31
  In today's episode, why financial independence got left out
• 0:35
  of the conversation when it comes to women,
• 0:37
  what to do if your partner takes the lead on finances,
• 0:40
  and what Farnoosh says owning it actually means.
• 0:44
  Here's my conversation with Farnoosh Torabi.
• 0:47
  Let's get started.
• 0:49
  I love your origin story, so, you know, it's
• 0:52
  because I really think it speaks to the passion you have
• 0:54
  for women in finance.
• 0:57
  With your parents, they'd fight about money,
• 0:58
  which I don't think is so uncommon in the world.
• 1:01
  Your mom would defer to your dad,
• 1:04
  which, also, probably not that uncommon,
• 1:08
  but how did that lead you down your career path?
• 1:11
  - I think it was that story that you just shared
• 1:14
  of growing up in an immigrant household where,
• 1:17
  like many traditional households, the dad took care
• 1:21
  of the finances and the mom, in my case, wasn't working.
• 1:24
  Eventually she did finish her college degree.
• 1:27
  She did get...
• 1:29
  She got going on multiple jobs, made her own money.
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  And I think that was also important to witness,
• 1:34
  to sort of see the benefits
• 1:36
  of when a woman actually would then go out in the world
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  and get a piece of her own financial life
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  and bring that back into the house
• 1:44
  and see her be more empowered.
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  And as soon as I could get my first work permit,
• 1:49
  I was out working in a restaurant.
• 1:51
  I was babysitting.
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  I loved earning.
• 1:54
  I just loved earning, but I also loved doing work
• 1:56
  that supported people.
• 1:59
  And then fast-forward to when I actually have to decide,
• 2:03
  I selected journalism ultimately
• 2:06
  because again, it combined everything.
• 2:09
  It combined the storytelling, the being in service
• 2:12
  of your reader in this case.
• 2:14
  And mentors would say, "Pick a lane.
• 2:17
  Get really clear on what kind of stories you want to tell
• 2:22
  and how you want to help people."
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  I guess I picked money
• 2:25
  because honestly, it was the first internship
• 2:27
  that accepted my application.
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  Money Magazine literally was like, "You can come work here.
• 2:31
  Nobody else wants to work here at your age."
• 2:33
  And I loved it.
• 2:35
  I loved...
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  For me, it was a big learning curve too.
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  I think my parents did a really great job of giving me
• 2:42
  the curiosity and the confidence around money,
• 2:45
  but the literacy still was lacking.
• 2:48
  And in fact, my father gave me one of the biggest lies.
• 2:51
  He didn't know it at the time, but this perpetual myth
• 2:54
  about credit scores, he was like,
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  "Farnoosh, you have to carry a balance if you want to..."
• 2:59
  - Oh yeah.
• 2:59
  People are like, "You must have debt in order
• 3:01
  to have a good credit score."
• 3:02
  Yeah.
• 3:03
  - All this to say that I was in my 20s feeling
• 3:06
  like I earned.
• 3:08
  I had a place in this world to learn about money.
• 3:10
  - So you said Money Magazine was the one that was willing
• 3:13
  to take you and you hadn't really thought money's
• 3:16
  where I want to go, but that's where you ended up.
• 3:19
  And I think we'll give a little career advice
• 3:22
  to the young out there.
• 3:23
  When you get offered opportunities when you're young,
• 3:25
  just say yes.
• 3:27
  - Yes.
• 3:28
  You don't know what perfect is.
• 3:29
  And I'll give you another secret.
• 3:31
  There's no such thing as a perfect job.
• 3:33
  And for me, it was about going somewhere that,
• 3:39
  first of all, wants me
• 3:41
  because you know you're going to be nurtured there.
• 3:43
  You know you're going to be mentored there.
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  It was in New York City
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  and I'm in a building with a lot of other journalists,
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  a lot of other magazines.
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  That is not a little thing, that exposure.
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  My father would always tell me,
• 3:58
  because I would say, "Oh, I'm so lucky."
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  He's like, "There's luck,
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  but then there's also identifying your luck."
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  I remember being in the newsroom one day.
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  I was in my early 20s.
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  I was just a junior reporter,
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  and the publicist for the magazine came into the newsroom
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  and said, "Does anybody here want to go on CNN
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  and talk about our new issue?"
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  - And you're like...
• 4:18
  - Yeah.
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  Before I even knew what I was supposed to do,
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  I said yes, because I knew that ultimately I wanted
• 4:24
  to transition into television.
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  It worked out and that clip ended up getting me my next job.
• 4:30
  - That's great.
• 4:31
  - There you go. That's great.
• 4:31
  Yeah, I mean, and that is so true.
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  So I love that.
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  So you've said that women were told to go to college,
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  get the job, pursue the career,
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  but financial independence piece was left out.
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  So what went wrong?
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  - As a culture in America, we don't really talk about it.
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  I think for women, it's a particularly dangerous thing
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  to not talk about because here's the thing,
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  I have a brother, he's going to enter a world
• 4:59
  that is willing to embrace him when it comes
• 5:03
  to his ambitions around money.
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  Whereas I think with women, we don't have
• 5:08
  that embracive world when we step out of our parents' home
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  and go into the real world.
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  And even if we got all the literacy,
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  there's two steps to this.
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  There's learning about it and then there's entering a world
• 5:19
  that says you can do this and you should do this.
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  I remember I did all the things.
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  I went to college, I went to graduate school.
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  When I did get married
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  and making more than my husband, because what do you expect?
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  What do you expect when you tell all the girls
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  to go to college,
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  all the girls to go to graduate school and make the money?
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  They're going to do those things.
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  And there was no script,
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  there was no sort of welcoming party, let's just say,
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  for a woman who makes more than her husband.
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  I felt like I got to that point,
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  and while we were okay with it in our relationship,
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  God forbid I ever brought it up at a dinner party.
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  This is not the sort of thing that my parents are going
• 6:00
  to brag about to their friends.
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  That's actually why I wanted to write about it
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  because I though, what does that say about
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  where we are in society, the irony of everything
• 6:08
  that we've accomplished, and yet this paradox?
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  So that became one of my books called "When She Makes More".
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  - Yeah, it's fascinating.
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  So my husband decided to become a stay-at-home dad.
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  I look at our kids now, they're in their 20s
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  and I'm just like the influence of having him
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  that active in their life is fabulous.
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  I can tell it in their confidence.
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  I can tell it in a lot of different things.
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  - And that's something that I learned in working with women
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  and writing about women's financial complexities
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  and encouraging women to earn more is that we forget
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  that men might have other ambitions besides-
• 6:46
  - Besides working, yes.
• 6:48
  - Besides working and making being the breadwinner.
• 6:51
  - Yes, exactly.
• 6:52
  Exactly.
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  So a lot of women feel like they're supposed to own a home
• 6:58
  by a certain age.
• 6:59
  Where does this pressure come from
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  and what should we do with it?
• 7:03
  - Oh my gosh.
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  It comes from every direction.
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  You name it, it's the advertising, it's our families,
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  it's our peer pressure, it's social media.
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  It's sort of this measure of success
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  that we have for adulthood.
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  You're not really an adult until you own something
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  and preferably a home.
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  But last I checked, a majority of adults under the age of 35
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  are living at home with their parents.
• 7:29
  - Correct.
• 7:30
  And now it's the smart financial decision.
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  - It can certainly be.
• 7:34
  And what I want to say to anybody,
• 7:37
  women, men, if you feel defeated
• 7:40
  by this current housing market, it's not your defeat,
• 7:43
  it's the defeat of our system.
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  There's a shortage of supply.
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  Everybody's got the 2.75% mortgage that they got
• 7:50
  and they refinanced during COVID
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  and they got the golden mortgage handcuffs.
• 7:54
  They're not giving that up.
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  Because where are they going to move?
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  - Right.
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  - They can't afford a home,
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  ironically, even though their homes have appreciated
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  and they have a lot of equity.
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  So that's one thing.
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  And then, of course, there's the cost
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  of carrying, which is 6%,
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  6.5% current mortgage rates,
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  plus the housing prices have gone up.
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  And so the math isn't mathing, as we say.
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  We have a lot of systemic problems in our country
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  that make just affording a home unreachable for the majority
• 8:28
  of young people right now.
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  But that said, it doesn't mean
• 8:32
  that you can't have a fulfilling
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  and successful life without owning.
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  I know many of my friends
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  who could buy, they have the means.
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  They're choosing to rent because they prefer the flexibility
• 8:44
  and they're instead using
• 8:46
  what they would've put towards a mortgage
• 8:48
  or taxes into the stock market
• 8:50
  and growing wealth in that way more aggressively.
• 8:53
  - Yeah, and I think that's the important point.
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  It's how are you creating that savings?
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  How are you making sure you're doing that
• 8:59
  and not using it for your travel fund?
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  So if someone's listening today
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  and is trying to decide whether
• 9:04
  to buy a home in the next year,
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  what are three financial checkpoints they should evaluate
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  before making that decision?
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  - We say like the three Cs, you need cash, you need credit,
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  you need collateral,
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  but I always like to say 20% is a good sort of rule of thumb
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  for your down payment simply
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  because then you can avoid the PMI,
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  which is private mortgage insurance.
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  It's also more skin in the game, right?
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  If your home depreciates in value, which again,
• 9:36
  won't be your fault, it's just market circumstances,
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  and then you have to sell, you won't be at risk of having
• 9:41
  to sell underwater, which means
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  that you owe more than the home is worth.
• 9:44
  The other thing is your credit that, especially couples,
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  I would say, really get aware of your credit scores
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  because often couples, they borrow together
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  and they assume
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  that maybe one partner has equal credit score,
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  equal credit standing than the other.
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  It may not be the case.
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  And the thing about credit is if you want
• 10:03
  to improve it, it takes time.
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  And the best mortgage rates
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  and the best terms, loan terms are usually going
• 10:10
  to borrowers with credit scores in the high 700s out
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  of 850 and higher.
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  So that's the other thing.
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  And then have savings in your bank
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  for other things that will come up as a homeowner,
• 10:25
  closing costs for one.
• 10:27
  But also, the first year
• 10:30
  of owning a home is such an unknown.
• 10:32
  You don't know.
• 10:33
  I mean, first year we moved into our house.
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  - You don't know what you don't know.
• 10:36
  - Yeah.
• 10:37
  Our fridge broke, that was a huge repair.
• 10:40
  We had a leak, that was a huge repair.
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  And so these are the things that we always say try
• 10:46
  to have about one to 2% of the value of your home saved
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  for those repairs.
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  Some of them will be routines,
• 10:54
  some of them will be surprises.
• 10:55
  And not only for that too, but just for your own security.
• 10:58
  At the risk of losing your job in that first year
• 11:01
  as you've become a homeowner,
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  I know it's happened to people.
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  I can name a few in my friend circle.
• 11:07
  Unfortunately, that's where having your own savings,
• 11:11
  six months, nine months of your bare bone living expenses,
• 11:15
  at least the mortgage, property taxes,
• 11:17
  insurance put aside somewhere.
• 11:20
  - I'm a young person and I'm like, I need to first go
• 11:25
  and save that six to nine months
• 11:27
  - Yes, for myself. kind of rainy day fund.
• 11:30
  That rainy day fund, right?
• 11:32
  So I want to do that first
• 11:33
  and then I need to go save the down payment.
• 11:35
  - Right.
• 11:36
  That's going to depend on your budget.
• 11:38
  And of course, we try to keep our monthly housing costs
• 11:42
  to no more than 30% of our income.
• 11:46
  That's your mortgage and hopefully,
• 11:48
  you can squeeze in there your property taxes and insurance.
• 11:51
  - Yeah, that was going to be my question is should we think
• 11:53
  about that 30% as the all-in kind of insurance,
• 11:57
  the property tax, the mortgage?
• 11:59
  - Especially if you have other debts,
• 12:01
  if you've got student loans
• 12:03
  and other sorts of debt overwhelm.
• 12:06
  And Angie, we're hearing a lot of boomers,
• 12:10
  baby boomers gifting money to their adult children
• 12:15
  sooner than later for the purposes of them being able
• 12:18
  to afford that down payment
• 12:20
  where in personal finance culture,
• 12:23
  there's a growing sentiment, growing appreciation
• 12:26
  for this concept of dying with zero.
• 12:29
  Generational wealth is very important to people
• 12:31
  who have themselves saved and invested a lot,
• 12:35
  but that doesn't mean that generational wealth can
• 12:37
  only start when you're gone.
• 12:40
  - Right. You can start
• 12:41
  to invest in the next generation while you're alive.
• 12:44
  And in fact, now more than ever, it's so appreciated, right?
• 12:49
  Let's say you live a long life
• 12:50
  and your kids are in their 60s, 70s, when you pass away,
• 12:54
  that's when you're going to give them some money
• 12:56
  so they could finally buy a house.
• 12:57
  - Get started.
• 12:59
  - Right, get started.
• 13:01
  If you have the capacity, of course, this isn't
• 13:03
  for everybody, but we do know that there is this transfer
• 13:05
  of wealth that's just sitting there waiting
• 13:09
  to come into the next generation's hands.
• 13:12
  - Right.
• 13:13
  Assisting with the house is not
• 13:14
  so dissimilar than assisting with college.
• 13:17
  - Yeah, and I think that's a taboo in our culture to say
• 13:20
  that you have either helped your kids
• 13:22
  or as a kid, I've received help from my parents.
• 13:25
  This is the thing when it comes to money, there is a badge
• 13:28
  of honor around doing it all yourself.
• 13:30
  The reality of someone just coming up
• 13:32
  and being successful on their own, that's not a story.
• 13:37
  Yes, there are self-made people.
• 13:39
  I'm not saying your parents helped you with your business
• 13:42
  or were investing your money,
• 13:43
  but even if you had the encouragement
• 13:48
  and the support and the moral support,
• 13:50
  that is worth its weight in gold.
• 13:52
  - I agree.
• 13:53
  - You don't have to just write a check.
• 13:54
  It's really about telling the next generation,
• 13:57
  "You're worth it.
• 13:59
  You deserve it.
• 14:00
  Here's how to do it.
• 14:01
  Here are my mistakes."
• 14:02
  - And being honest about it, yeah.
• 14:03
  So you've said a primary residence isn't
• 14:06
  really an investment, but it is interesting.
• 14:08
  I've found in our surveying over the last few years
• 14:13
  that people are less
• 14:14
  and less thinking about the money they're putting
• 14:16
  into their house from an ROI perspective
• 14:19
  and are thinking more about it for making the home livable
• 14:22
  for them and their experience and things like that.
• 14:24
  So I'd love you to walk through your thinking
• 14:27
  on don't think about your house as the investment tool.
• 14:30
  - A home, sure.
• 14:33
  It will appreciate hopefully,
• 14:34
  and we know that the charts show
• 14:36
  that over the decades home values have generally gone up
• 14:40
  in our country, but not as much as the stock market.
• 14:44
  And then when you start to do the deductions, right,
• 14:48
  that alone is not a fair way to characterize an investment.
• 14:52
  You can't just say that the ROI is positive
• 14:54
  because the equity grew.
• 14:56
  You also have to then take into account the cost
• 14:59
  of carrying that investment.
• 15:00
  And so the net of it for a lot
• 15:02
  of homeowners is actually nothing.
• 15:05
  It's negative financially.
• 15:08
  And so I think for those people taking that survey,
• 15:11
  it's really about what is their definition of investment?
• 15:15
  How are they looking at it?
• 15:16
  If you're looking at it purely
• 15:17
  from a mathematical standpoint,
• 15:19
  your money in the stock market is going
• 15:22
  to grow more and have more of a net benefit at the end
• 15:26
  of the 20, 30, 40 year cycle simply
• 15:28
  because the stock market, there's no overhead.
• 15:32
  There's no property taxes.
• 15:34
  You're not painting your stocks every year.
• 15:37
  You're not getting a new roof for your stocks,
• 15:40
  you know what I mean?
• 15:41
  Whereas, of course, you have to keep up a home
• 15:44
  and there are all those additional costs
• 15:47
  and the interest, of course, for carrying the mortgage.
• 15:49
  And so at the end of the day, yes, you might cash out
• 15:52
  and have some equity to pull out,
• 15:54
  but don't fool yourself to think that having the opportunity
• 15:56
  to have that equity came at a cost.
• 15:58
  You paid for that equity.
• 16:00
  You paid for that day where you could cash out that equity
• 16:04
  in that you kept the home standing in a good place
• 16:07
  to then be able to sell it to earn that nest egg.
• 16:11
  - So in listening to you, some people might be like,
• 16:13
  "Okay, well maybe she's anti-house."
• 16:16
  - No.
• 16:17
  - But you've owned four homes, right?
• 16:19
  - Yeah. You've been a homeowner
• 16:21
  a long time.
• 16:22
  - I best case and worst case scenario it.
• 16:24
  For me as a mom, I'm not saying you have to own a home
• 16:28
  as a parent, but it's been very beneficial to be able
• 16:31
  to have a place
• 16:32
  that we know psychologically no one can kick us out,
• 16:36
  you know, and that we can make changes
• 16:40
  and grow into this home for as long as we want to,
• 16:44
  as long as we can afford to.
• 16:45
  No one else is calling the shots.
• 16:48
  But I have rented as well in between owning,
• 16:52
  because it's a tool.
• 16:54
  You need to rent sometimes to be able to let a home close
• 16:58
  and settle and take the money out
• 17:00
  and then take your time-
• 17:01
  - Before you reinvest, right.
• 17:02
  - To reinvest, right.
• 17:03
  - So when two people buy a home together
• 17:05
  without having real financial conversations first,
• 17:09
  you alluded to this one a little bit, what usually happens?
• 17:12
  - It's not even just about the house.
• 17:14
  Typically, when two people are sharing a life together,
• 17:16
  one person knows a lot more about the money
• 17:18
  than the other person.
• 17:19
  The consequence of that is one person can feel like there's
• 17:22
  more capacity to spend and take risks than the other.
• 17:26
  So it's very important that at the least,
• 17:28
  I always say if you're not the money person
• 17:30
  in the relationship, which it's not a criticism.
• 17:34
  I think sometimes it's efficient for one person
• 17:37
  to be more kind of the CFO of the household,
• 17:41
  but that doesn't excuse the other person
• 17:43
  from knowing nothing.
• 17:45
  So you have to at least know what your carrying costs are
• 17:49
  for the home and that your home is an asset
• 17:54
  that you want to protect,
• 17:56
  and you want to be smart about the investments.
• 17:59
  There are certain investments that will pay off.
• 18:01
  And we know, you know this better than anybody,
• 18:03
  that renovating your kitchens, your bathrooms, doing sort
• 18:06
  of the foundational upkeep, that is the stuff
• 18:09
  that actually you see pay off in.
• 18:11
  It's not necessarily the design of the home
• 18:15
  or rather the aesthetic design of the home.
• 18:17
  - Right, right, right, because that stuff comes and goes.
• 18:19
  Comes and goes. - It does.
• 18:21
  Walls can get knocked down and paint can change, right?
• 18:23
  - Right, exactly.
• 18:25
  So you've spent your career helping women understand
• 18:27
  that financial independence is non-negotiable.
• 18:31
  So for a woman who owns a home,
• 18:33
  but lets her partner handle most
• 18:35
  of the financial decisions, where does she start?
• 18:38
  Where do you start kind of getting involved?
• 18:41
  - Conversation, communication.
• 18:43
  You have to schedule it.
• 18:46
  But it first starts with a vulnerable conversation,
• 18:49
  coming to your partner and sharing kind of the concerns
• 18:52
  that you have, the things that are keeping you up at night.
• 18:54
  If you get resistance to that, pay attention.
• 18:59
  - Yeah.
• 19:00
  - It should be...
• 19:00
  The only correct answer in that situation is,
• 19:02
  "Of course I understand.
• 19:03
  Let's do something about that.
• 19:05
  Let's bring in a financial planner.
• 19:07
  Let's you and I sit down.
• 19:09
  I can show you how I look at the finances every month.
• 19:12
  Come with your questions."
• 19:14
  That is the only okay answer from your partner
• 19:17
  as far as I'm concerned.
• 19:18
  And it's not about you not trusting your partner
• 19:22
  or feeling like they're not the right person to be...
• 19:26
  It's more about this is our life together
• 19:30
  and two people co-piloting this is better than one.
• 19:33
  And maybe you're piloting it a little bit more,
• 19:36
  but I need to always know where the emergency exits are,
• 19:38
  how to take over if you need a break.
• 19:41
  At the minimum, you want to know what your partner earns,
• 19:45
  you want to understand the tax returns,
• 19:47
  so be sure you're CC'd on all of those emails
• 19:50
  with the accountant.
• 19:51
  If your partner is doing his
• 19:53
  or her own meetings with financial experts, you want
• 19:57
  to join those meetings.
• 20:01
  You want to know what the credit scores are.
• 20:02
  You want to know the passwords, the username
• 20:04
  and passwords to all of the bank accounts.
• 20:07
  There are dashboards that couples can share online,
• 20:10
  different apps that will allow you to see all
• 20:13
  of your accounts on one dashboard, which is nice.
• 20:17
  And that way you don't have to log
• 20:18
  into 13 different accounts.
• 20:20
  It sort of pulls everything for you.
• 20:22
  And that transparency is
• 20:26
  ultimately what you're looking for.
• 20:28
  You want communication, transparency, and trust.
• 20:31
  And sometimes, that takes systems and scheduling,
• 20:34
  but sometimes it's just getting into this habit
• 20:38
  of talking about money more casually with one another.
• 20:42
  So if you're out in the supermarket
• 20:44
  or the grocery, you text each other,
• 20:46
  "Hey, we were going to get this thing for the kitchen.
• 20:49
  I found one, it's on sale, but it's $200.
• 20:51
  What do you think?"
• 20:52
  And chances are, your partner is going
• 20:54
  to be like, "Fine, sure."
• 20:55
  But it's just feeling included in that.
• 20:59
  I always get curious when someone comes home
• 21:01
  with a new car.
• 21:04
  You're like, "How did that happen?"
• 21:05
  - How did that happen?
• 21:07
  Those commercials, like those Christmas time commercials,
• 21:09
  "Honey, I got you an..."
• 21:11
  Those terrify me because I'm like,
• 21:13
  How did they think that was okay?
• 21:15
  - Right, right.
• 21:16
  Yeah, exactly. - There must be so much money
• 21:18
  going around that an $80,000 car is
• 21:22
  like no sweat off your back.
• 21:23
  - Right, right, right, right.
• 21:28
  Yes.
• 21:28
  You know, let's go with the sweater,
• 21:30
  not the large financial asset.
• 21:32
  - I mean, clue me in a little bit, you know?
• 21:36
  - So as we wrap here, I'd love for you to reflect
• 21:40
  what does it actually mean to own it?
• 21:42
  Not just your house, but really your financial life.
• 21:45
  - It means creating a life for yourself
• 21:47
  where you have options.
• 21:49
  Owning it means having options.
• 21:51
  You can't own anything if you're stuck,
• 21:54
  if you feel compromised,
• 21:56
  if you feel like you only have one strict path to follow,
• 22:00
  building a life for yourself that actually meets you
• 22:02
  where you're at and fulfills you is not free.
• 22:07
  And so when you do that, your life opens up, doors open up.
• 22:12
  You get suddenly more confident in creating new solutions
• 22:16
  and strategies for yourself.
• 22:17
  There are many times in your life
• 22:18
  where you may feel dead-ended,
• 22:20
  but the person who owns it, who has financial independence
• 22:25
  will not say, "Well, I guess this is just what I got to do."
• 22:28
  They'll go, "No, I'm going to figure this out.
• 22:30
  I'm going to call up some resources.
• 22:32
  I'm going to create something for myself, a path,
• 22:35
  a new blueprint that is going to be more my speed,
• 22:40
  makes me happier,
• 22:41
  and so I don't have to do what I'm "supposed to do",
• 22:44
  or that I'm being "`forced to do".
• 22:46
  And I think for women, whenever I meet someone who's like,
• 22:50
  "But why?
• 22:51
  My husband takes care of the money,"
• 22:52
  or, "I don't know,
• 22:54
  I'm just not really good at the money stuff,"
• 22:56
  I say, "Do you like having options?"
• 22:59
  Because that is the life that money can afford you.
• 23:04
  And when situations get hard or tough or boring
• 23:08
  or just not your cup of tea, whether it's at work
• 23:12
  or in your household or in life, money affords you options
• 23:17
  and for nothing else, you should want that for yourself.
• 23:21
  - Having financial independence doesn't mean being rich.
• 23:24
  It means having options when life doesn't
• 23:26
  always go as planned.
• 23:28
  If your partner handles all the finances
• 23:30
  and you don't, it's time to get more involved.
• 23:33
  Not because there's something wrong, it just means
• 23:36
  that you need to know where the emergency exits are.
• 23:38
  Know what you earn, know what you owe,
• 23:41
  and know what it takes to keep your house standing
• 23:43
  each month.
• 23:44
  Be a copilot, not a passenger.
• 23:46
  Before you buy a home, Farnoosh has three things to check,
• 23:49
  your cash for the down payment, your credit score,
• 23:53
  and your savings cushion for that first year,
• 23:56
  because I can tell you that first year is going to be full
• 23:59
  of surprises that you didn't budget for.
• 24:01
  Have six to nine months
• 24:02
  of bare bones living expenses set aside
• 24:05
  before you sign anything.
• 24:07
  And remember, your primary residence isn't
• 24:09
  your investment portfolio.
• 24:11
  It will grow in value,
• 24:13
  but it is going to cost you a roof, a furnace,
• 24:16
  an air conditioner, and years of carrying costs.
• 24:19
  So it's important to go in
• 24:20
  with eyes wide open about that math.
• 24:23
  And here's the one that really stuck with me.
• 24:25
  No one cares about your money more than you do.
• 24:28
  Not your partner, not your parents,
• 24:30
  and sorry, not your bank.
• 24:32
  It's not a warning, but a permission slip.
• 24:35
  Own that and everything else opens up.
• 24:38
  That's it for "Own It Today",
• 24:39
  and a big thanks to Farnoosh for joining us.
• 24:42
  If this episode spoke to you, share it with a woman
• 24:45
  that you know that could use it, your best friend,
• 24:47
  your mom, your sister.
• 24:49
  I'm Angie Hicks, and I'll see you next time.