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Child Support Issues · 4 The Exchange

• GoFredo: What's ha. the word, everybody? How y'all doing? I got the gang here for the exchange. And we got the question of the week for y'all. Okay. How is society viewing children in separate households? Like co parenting. Like co-parenting the mother and the father are separated. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Right or I'm gonna slide it you first. Well, and if we being honest, society views it as the as the mother wins. It ain't even about it ain't even about the court system or anything like that. Society view it as the mother should win, full custody of the child should give full custody of the child no matter what the situation is, no matter she a good mother or a bad mother, no matter if the dad's good or bad, no matter what the situation is. Excuse me. We know how it's kinda set up is that the dad has to be like overwhelming. As the caregiver, and the mother just has to be so terrible for her to lose, kinda lose custody of her kids for it to give to the dad. I didn't seen too many cases, too many situations. And I know it's exceptions to the rule. There definitely is. But overall, if we keep it at a buck, the mother wins for the children every single time. It kind of just goes to the mother as the number one caregiver, and that's how we view it in society. I'm noticing a shift and a change, especially in this social media era, but overall. It's still moms. Moms dupes when in the kids are all day, all day, every day. That's just how it's going. What about you, Lei? What you think? LayTheDon: agree about 50 % of that and I only said and I only GoFredo: Well that what what what did you agree? What you agree with? LayTheDon: and I'm only saying that because there's a quote that I hear regularly they say mommy's baby daddy's maybe because at the end of the day as a mom you can't really walk away from your kid you can't really just step out there unless you give them up for adoption you can't really just walk away from kill but for a guy You can walk out that kid's life whenever you want and you really don't have to, you don't have to deal with it. You don't have to be around a kid. You don't have to show up. So they kind of make it an obligation for the woman because most mother as a motherly instinct, as a mother, most women, even if like for those who have been at surrogates, like GoFredo: Yeah, LayTheDon: you've grown that attachment to the kid where they like you have the more motherly instincts to be able to better take care of the kid. Not saying that's the case with all situations now in the court system today. Yes, they are more likely to gear. custody to a mom under circumstances, like if a man can actually approve, like prove that, I take care of my kid, I'm there for my kid, I'm not absent father, then a lot of courts will happily give that, you know, give that custody to the father, but it's just the fact that like, GoFredo: Hello. LayTheDon: don't think about the fact that they don't keep receipts. They don't, like I said, a father can walk away anytime a mother can't. GoFredo: I think you wanna be honest with you before we let Cal go. I think I think both can kind of walk away whenever they want to. I think I we didn't seen we didn't seen and heard and been around situations. You know, it used to be a time you can leave your kids at the fire station. You know, drop the kid off and keep it pushing. I think yeah, yeah. So you know, LayTheDon: You're still paying. Still paying. GoFredo: I think both parties can. I just think it's more I don't I don't like you said, it's kinda hard. I'm not really sure what the kind of what the reasoning reason it is. LayTheDon: It's like I said, it's a motherly, it's a motherly instinct thing. you like a mother for some reason, like whenever a kid is born, like granted, I don't have any kids myself, but I've seen firsthand, like you could be really, we could be really frantic. We can really talk. We can be really scared when it comes to having kids. But for some reason, the minute that kid is in our arms, like your mother's motherly instinct just kind of like clicks like that. And you understand wholeheartedly what you're supposed to do for a man. GoFredo: Mm. LayTheDon: Those instincts don't really kick in. for like a woman's dust. It's just something, it's a mother's something that kind of kicks in, men don't have them. GoFredo: I don't know. I I I guess some brothers out here that and not just brothers in black, but I mean brothers out here the dudes in total that's fathers handling a business through and through. Whether they was raised right, whether it's the trauma of them their d it's the trauma of their dad not being there or the way they was raised by their parents, whether it was single parent or two parent household. Wait a minute, we lost a member. They'll be back soon. But whether it's a two parent household, I think when it comes down to it, I think a dad, I just think it's I don't think it's motherly or fatherly is the word. I just think it's some people just handle their business. there go. I just think some brothers there you go. LayTheDon: he back. Kevin: Okay. GoFredo: I just think I just think some some brothers, or some men is just willing to step up to the plate when it comes to it. But before I kinda deep dive into what I gotta say, Kev, what's your what what's your perspective on this? I cause hey, you You gotta go on through that, man. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta go through some situations. So speak to us. What's you what's your perspective on it? Kevin: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I mean I'm I'm I'm going through it. So first of all, let's just kick Lay off the show today. Now I'm just playing. Now I'm just playing. Now I'm just playing. I'm just playing. LayTheDon: That's crazy! Kobi: That's wow. Kevin: I'm just playing. Let's just let's GoFredo: Yeah. LayTheDon: See I told y'all they keep trying to double-sing. Y'all they keep trying to triple-sing me like ladies. GoFredo: Ain't nobody triple titties. Kevin: just nip that in the butt right there. LayTheDon: They trying to triple-tame me. Y'all see this? First-hand! First-hand, y'all saw it. Kevin: Y'all, yeah, yeah, yeah, y'all catch him next week. GoFredo: Guys, y'all catch Y'all catch on next week's episode. LayTheDon: Y'all see? I ain't lying. Kevin: man, nah. but nah nah. I mean y'all y'all both saying some some stuff that's that's spot on though, but I could say this, the the standard for men and women is completely different. and and what you were talking about, like, you know, this be because of like you know what you're talking about, you were making some good some good points, like but the standards for men and women are completely different. So to to a point, when it comes to especially we get to the court the court stuff, how the court is looking at it, they're looking at moms because you know they're supposed to be more nurturing and things like that. But the reality is that doesn't outweigh everything. Just because you're you're a nurturer doesn't mean that a father can't be a nurturer, you know what I mean? So LayTheDon: Right. Kevin: so the standard is different because when you when you look at it, so women are supposed to be the the nurturer and men are supposed to be the provider and things like that. That standard never really goes away in that system. The problem with that is when a GoFredo: Yeah. Kevin: if you look at a a man by himself and a woman by herself, society is and I and I'm speaking from a from more of like a like a government standpoint, they're more likely to help a woman. from a financial standpoint and all that stuff before they looking to help a man because they're looking at men like you should be doing what you're supposed to do. You know what I mean? It doesn't matter if he has kids or not, you know what I mean? But when we throw kids when we throw the kids in there The man is not looked at the same way with that same with that same respect. They're just they're just not. You know, so it makes it it makes it harder. And I GoFredo: True. Kevin: think that a and and I say that because a lot of the time when I when w especially with that financial part, a lot of men they get the they get that rough end that rough end of the stick and they're expected to, you know, in a sense, overextend themselves. To make sure the kids are taken care of. But moms aren't expected to do that. And for me, that's a problem. I don't know what GoFredo: Yeah. Kevin: y'all, what y'all, what y'all thinking? GoFredo: you wanna be honest with you, bro. I think when it comes to that situation, I think you're right. I think when it comes to society because I had something click into my head the other day. Y'all know I'm a big history buff. I do my true crime stuff and a lot of people act like certain things was just decades ago, I mean not decades ago, centuries and centuries and centuries ago. And then when you actually look at what society is now, and like you said, when you look at us in twenty twenty six, we so advanced with technology and everything like that, but from a humanity standpoint, we still in our emphasis when it comes to certain things. Like Kev said, it was a certain time where like men would go out and hunt and do everything and a woman would stay at the house and just Like cook what was already there, clean the house, or clean the shed or whatever, the hut, and take care of the kids and whatnot. Have X amount of kids and then a woman would take care of while the man go to war, do X, Y, and Z. And we kind of still have that mindset today. And like women's rights and everything is still recent. We're still in the infancy of that. To where we still we we're getting women doing quote unquote, as they say, men jobs. But I like Kev said, I think the court system from a standpoint is still, even though society is evolving, our laws in our court system is still in I I still feel like our laws are still in this in this two thousand and it's not two thousand, in this nineteen hundreds still in the nineteen hundreds era. Like I just found out the other day, like in twenty twenty four, I believe, or twenty either in in between twenty twenty and twenty twenty four, in the state of Ohio, it was okay for a man to rape his wife. Like this was just like Between two to six years ago that this law just got put into place. And then like you would think that, wait a minute, how? LayTheDon: Bye. GoFredo: Like you would think that that's impossible. Like we in LayTheDon: there. GoFredo: twenty twenty, but like nah like this law just got put into place where a man could actually like drug his wife and sleep with her and it was legal. And it's don't even make any sense. So like that's our court system. So I I'm with Kev. I believe that the court system plays the bigger factor more than anything. But Kobe, what's your perspective on the whole situation? You kinda in there, hey, you you you got Kobi: Yeah. GoFredo: your daughter too, what you think? Kobi: Me having my daughter and having to go through the court system to set things up, it's a headache, honestly. I would like to just sit down face to face and talk things out, but that's out of the window, and that's been out of the window for the last past five years. I've been on it. I I I've been on this lovely thing I like to call CS, but everybody else in the everybody in the chat know what it is. Child support. Hate it. Kevin: Yeah. Kobi: Hate it. Kev, I don't know if you want it. I I pray that you not. Fredo, Leigh, Kevin: yeah. Kobi: I hope that y'all never get to that state or ever feel that have to go through that. GoFredo: You ain't got worry about me, player. You ain't got worry. I'm good over here, player. I ain't getting LayTheDon: Good. good, yes, Kobi: But GoFredo: covered out too. Hey, I didn't been through too much. I'm out the game for that. Kobi: But that that that that that child support is it could easily be avoided due to the simple fact by having a talk and a sit down and actually co LayTheDon: Communication. Kobi: patting, co parenting. That's how it can be a but being on it, it absolutely sucks. You said what, Fredo? GoFredo: You think it Do you think it can be fixed? No, I was gonna like do you think do you think LayTheDon: Mm. GoFredo: it's something that can be resolved? Like you think it's time, do you think it's Kobi: It can be resolved with a conversation. It's it's it it it doesn't get any more deeper than that. Just communicate it. GoFredo: But I'm s you s but I'm but I'm saying from like from like okay you said from your perspective, but also like do you think that she's Kobi: It's it's from GoFredo: willing to have that conversation with you and get past it? Late funny is it Kobi: Okay. Keeping it up, but no. GoFredo: I'm on lay hell now. Kobi: I don't think she will. She's getting she's getting free money. LayTheDon: Well, the only reason why I said that he's saying is that five years and she ain't done it yet now I is this with five years. She didn't talk to you She Kobi: It's been five years. LayTheDon: comes over was yet Kobi: She she GoFredo: Facts. Kobi: comfortable is like Lay said, she comfortable with she at. Listen, my little one is about to turn eight, December first. I I still got LayTheDon: So you've been paying child support since she was three? Kobi: I still got ten years left in it. Yeah. GoFredo: It's a long time, duh. LayTheDon: Well, I mean, you don't want to decide to sit there and do what grown adults do, as you say. Please say no. GoFredo: Yeah yeah, what he say? I was doing what gro what'd he say last week? I was doing what grown adults do when you ain't supposed to do when you're young. Kobi: I was I was listen. I was young and dumb at Kevin: Yeah. Kobi: I was young and dumb. I was young and dumb. GoFredo: Ha ha ha. Kobi: I was young as that. But the first three years was was good. Now it's having to go through court to GoFredo: Did y'all like break up or something? Kobi: yeah business. Huh? GoFredo: I mean to cut you off. I was just I'm curious. I'm I'm I'm like extra curious about it. Did y'all like break up? And then like did things get rocky after Kobi: Then we break up GoFredo: the Kobi: things got rocky after my daughter got here. Got to the world. So GoFredo: okay. So y'all was together, then y'all had a kid and then that's when things got interesting. LayTheDon: Everything just kind of. Kobi: Yes. GoFredo: Okay. LayTheDon: Yeah, was that the same thing that happened to you y'all together and then y'all and a kid happened and she just went to fec- went- went left? Kevin: Hell no, hell no. LayTheDon: Are you still alive? Kobi: Ha ha ha. LayTheDon: I'm so sorry. GoFredo: You mean to laugh, but Kim called me off garbage, daddy? Kevin: hell dah, hell dah, LayTheDon: Was I not together when it happened? Kevin: Gee, was we was we not was we not together? LayTheDon: Was y'all together when she was conceived? GoFredo: Excuse me. Kevin: Nah, nah, nah. We wasn't no we wasn't together. You know what I mean? I was I was LayTheDon: Y'all was just pro- Y'all was just pro-licating and some shit happened. Kevin: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think she caught me off the henny one night. GoFredo: That's how you frolic. Kevin: That's the only thing I could that's the only thing I could Kobi: Ha ha ha ha. Kevin: you know what I mean? LayTheDon: It's probably kidding. GoFredo: When you frolic. Kevin: I think I think she caught me off the honey one night. And nah but the crazy part is like I ain't in GoFredo: Hey, and he been drinking crown ever since. He been drinking LayTheDon: Bye! Kevin: I'm like, right, I ain't drink I ain't GoFredo: He been drinking crown ever since. Kevin: drink any every cent. LayTheDon: I'm not getting any touch, can I see your six? GoFredo: Yeah. Hey broke at PTSD off the henny. Kobi: Yeah. Kevin: And it makes me mad every time I see a henny bottle, anytime I see a henny bottle, I I throw it. But you know it's a henny bottle so it don't break, so it makes me even more mad, you know what I mean? Kobi: That man tried. Henny got LayTheDon: I'm gonna be having flashbacks. Kobi: him traumatized. LayTheDon: Any trauma? That's that, that's the part, GoFredo: Yeah. Kevin: Biggie. LayTheDon: is that the part of the trauma you ain't healed from? Kevin: yeah. I be trying to break GoFredo: Ha ha ha ha. Kevin: any bottles, you know they don't break. LayTheDon: Okay. Kevin: You know what I mean? sh that that's crazy. GoFredo: Hey no, hey y'all crazy. I ain't gonna let you Kevin: Yo. But nah, nah, I d I didn't know. My situation was LayTheDon: But on a serious note, on a serious note... Kevin: different. I did I didn't know. I didn't I didn't know. I mean, you know. LayTheDon: You could say, we know when you found out. Kevin: Well you know. GoFredo: Yeah, that was crazy. Kobi: That was crazy. Kevin: Yeah. Yeah, y'all, y'all was GoFredo: I was gonna say we always done. LayTheDon: Hey, that was so lame! Kobi: What? But you was going through it that night, boy. GoFredo: Yeah, we was all there. That was crazy. Kevin: I was I was well the thing was this. The thing was this, like I got the news, so I and this like I don't want to stay on it, but like you know, I got the news the night before I flew out. Like the night before I flew out like I'm flying out in the morning, I found out at like like one in the morning, man. I was I was I was quiet for like LayTheDon: I'm Anthony. Kevin: two days, two, three days before I said something. GoFredo: Well. Kevin: I think matter of fact, bro, I told you first. I told Fredo first, and I said, man, I'm I'm stressed out right now. I ain't say a word for like, you know what I mean? Like two days. LayTheDon: That man couldn't even enjoy his vacation. It's crazy. Kevin: Yeah, I couldn't even do it GoFredo: My thing is, Kevin: my vacation. GoFredo: my thing is, why'd you hey we since we on the topic, my thing is like when it comes to that situation, I ain't gonna lie to you, the I think I think men and women ain't ain't shit, if I'm being honest. But when it comes to that situation, Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: Shorty Wilder. LayTheDon: We may see more though. GoFredo: Huh? Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: You said what? Nah, Cap. But look, Cap, but look, check this out. she capping. LayTheDon: I I should more though, but it's Kobi: Hey Lila, you lagging, I can't hear you. You said what? GoFredo: But I I just think with that situation, especially like especially like Shorty knew that bro was going on a trip and leaving. And then you decide to do this early in the morning the day technically the day of the trip. Like that's that Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: was LayTheDon: she was made to show y'all ass why I'm having no fun. GoFredo: Like yeah, like that to me is crazy. Kevin: Well, and it was a timing thing. I don't think she she ain't know she ain't know I was going on a trip until you know what I'm saying? Until I said it in that moment, cause she randomly just hit me up. GoFredo: I thought she knew. Kevin: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We had to smoke. But and that's and that's the part we'll we'll we'll you know we'll get to. When she told me, it wasn't like, you know what I'm saying, that the timeline of it, yo, she told me she was like eight months alone when she told me. You know what I'm saying? It wasn't like LayTheDon: Hey! Kevin: Yeah, she went through the whole she went through the Kobi: So she here took me for eight months? GoFredo: yeah. Yeah. Kevin: whole pregnancy. LayTheDon: DID HEAR THAT FROM YOU FOR EIGHT MONTHS? Kevin: Yo, she went through the whole pregnancy and like tried to lie. So, you know what I'm saying? My situation is a little bit different. It's a Kobi: Women ain't shit. That's what it is. Kevin: little bit is a little bit different. You know what I'm saying? So like I'm not now look, I'm not putting all women in that LayTheDon: No, she ain't Not women. She ain't shit. He's an Iberus. Kevin: My if GoFredo: I I I just say both parties, but Kevin: my view of w of women But listen, if I I'd be biased if I said that for real. Like if I think like all women was like that. If I just say all women is just is just, you know what I'm saying, based on my situation, I would just be completely biased because she was just she did something crazy. You know what I'm saying? That was the that's GoFredo: That was wow. Kevin: the difference. You know what I mean? So like I don't I don't put something like that on all on all women, you know what I mean? But nah and that was like that was a LayTheDon: Yeah, don't put that on Kevin: Yeah, yeah, right. Not e not even you, Lei. Not even you. LayTheDon: Lay ain't shit, but Lay ain't that much not shit. Yeah, I'm not that. GoFredo: Telling about his levels to it. Kevin: That's a different level, right? Right, right. That's a different level. LayTheDon: right. So, all right. If we've been, if we're going, we're going to keep, I'm going to keep it being because and ladies, the GoFredo: That's what we hear for. LayTheDon: ladies might not agree with me. The ladies might not agree with me. My men will probably agree with me. I'm going honest you. I'm not going to say I 100 % don't believe in child support. But I am not one to quickly put a man on child support, especially if he's actively in the kid's life. He's actively doing what he's supposed to be doing. We communicate regularly about the kid. Like I'm not, that's not my first go to unless I am on my last leg and I direly need help. I'm not putting you on child support, but don't think you finish just being around my kid and you're not helping me support them financially, mentally, physically, emotionally and all this. I'm not like. If you decide you just want to be an absent father, cool, just be an absent father. I'm not finna go put you on child support just cause you're absent father. I can raise my kid by myself. However, however, for the fathers who decide to lay there and do the adult shit and you choose not to be in your kid's life and then getting pissed off because you're on child support, that's different. GoFredo: Yeah, yeah, that's different. LayTheDon: Because, because you chose to lay there and make that kid, you chose to not be in that kid's life. So if she does put you on child support, you gonna have to suck that up, bro. You should have been in the kids' lap. Now. GoFredo: I agree with that. LayTheDon: Right. Now. do want to say that for the ones that have multiple kids and no one of us have got multiple kids, fucking god. They have multiple kids with multiple women and you ain't settled down with none of them and you keep making kids and you're constantly getting pissed off being on shop. That's a you problem. That is a you problem. That's you being ancient and keep choosing ancient women. for them and for the women who got multiple baby daddies and that's not in their kids. That's I'm sorry. Keep choosing ancient men. That is your problem. Me personally, like I said, I am not one to push you on child support. don't child support does not raise a kid child support does not support a kid. Half the time child support don't even pay for half the shit the kid actually needs. But. As if we're talking. GoFredo: True. Well, it depends how much a dad make. LayTheDon: Yeah, that depends on like I said, yeah that depends but here's the thing if I'm talking from a from a societal we take the core system completely out the picture Let's be real If a man is single, I he is not in relationship y'all out here, correct? GoFredo: If a man's single LayTheDon: Yes, no Kobi: I'm out here but I ain't flanging. I'm I'm not I'm not slanging. LayTheDon: Right, right if you are for men who are not in relationship most of y'all are still out here and Having GoFredo: yeah, I see you say, yeah. LayTheDon: a kid having a kid having a kid sometimes Is is is is a turn off for a female? Because y'all honestly sit there and be like with the lifestyle GoFredo: Okay. LayTheDon: that y'all currently live that y'all would be willing to Fully take care of a kid five to seven days out the week. Like I'm talking your complete life that you live right now is completely centered around that kid. Do you have the capability mentally to actually be able to do that and still be able to work and do the shit that you do as well as be outside? Kevin: Well it's the thing though. I mean I don't I don't speak for Kobi: How sad will have to wait? Kevin: all men. I don't speak for all men. I speak for myself. My situation was set up so I could do all that. But it's the thing though. I'm I'm growing I'm not outside though. That's the thing. I'm not I'm not really outside. You know what I mean? That's the that's the difference. I get what you're saying. GoFredo: Yeah, I think LayTheDon: You have your own business, which means you make your own hours. I get that. Let's not Kevin: I know what you said. LayTheDon: talk about kids. Pam's not in this question. He's his own. We ain't talking about kids. That is a special case. Okay, you got your own business. You can make your own hours. We get it. COVID. GoFredo: Hey, hey, Lay said, hey, hey, hey, what can what can I say earlier? Hey. Hey. Hey, Lei hit you with the re Kevin: Well well but look, but look. No, no, look. No, I don't want to be a special kid. GoFredo: Lei hit you with the reverse. LayTheDon: For a copy of Fredo with the lifestyle that y'all currently live. I don't mean, I don't know Kobe get bitches, but I know Fredo sometimes get bitches. It depends on the day. what the? Kevin: Hey, hey, hey, hold on, wait a sec. All my guys, hey, hey, listen, GoFredo: Sometimes hey what you hey you know what you hey you hey she's Kobi: This was facts. GoFredo: bugging Kobi: What? Kevin: hey, listen. All my guys handle business. LayTheDon: All jokes, all jokes, all jokes. But I'm just saying, the lifestyle that you're currently living, would you... GoFredo: Hey boy, chill that be bug up in this. Kevin: Hey, I was about to hey you bro, that's what I was talking about. I I'm about to turn into Shannon, Shannon. Skip, skip, skip. GoFredo: Hey hey, stop her. Stop No trolling. LayTheDon: With the lifestyle that you currently live, would you be able to physically or want to physically be able to support a kid daily from five to seven days a week with the lifestyle that you currently live? GoFredo: yeah, Kobe. Kobi: Yes, because I do. Even though I have to travel to go see my little one, I still make sure that I take care of my business GoFredo: Okay. Kobi: here where I'm at by working my nine of five and getting everything for free. LayTheDon: You're not answering my question. You're not answering my question. GoFredo: She said could she said she said would you still go outside with Kobi: I say yeah. LayTheDon: Could you So so right now right now if your daughter got transferred to you and GoFredo: Mm-hmm. LayTheDon: she was able to live with you five to seven days out the week because you Be able to live that life with her currently right now is what I'm asking you every single day and still and still go to work All right, Fredo you outside, Kobi: Yes. I'm not outside right now. I'm not I'm not outside. Yes. Not outside. LayTheDon: right? GoFredo: I'll give it a take. Give it a take. I didn't c I I didn't I d chill down. I'm inside Kevin: Thank you, Richie. GoFredo: now. I'm chillin' now. LayTheDon: Because you be with when when when you was outside we y'all about to say GoFredo: Okay. LayTheDon: I'm like y'all don't be doing shit cuz cuz Maybe I just don't know this Kobi: Right now, when was the last time we went outside? GoFredo: Huh? Kobi: When was the last time we went outside? GoFredo: What like then that year two? Nah, last year. LayTheDon: y'all already know that number six, nevermind. Kobi: We've been we been put up. We've been in the house. GoFredo: Last year. But no, to answer LayTheDon: You got a girl? GoFredo: to answer like question to a LayTheDon: I told you. You got it, girl? GoFredo: you got a shorty? he that is LayTheDon: So how you put up with no shawty? How you put up with no shawty? Which means you ain't gonna no bitch. Kobi: I'm working. GoFredo: BAH! Kobi: I ain't got my I ain't got a I'm I ain't got no time for it. Kevin: Dang, right, he right, right, right. GoFredo: Hey, how he go from just chilling in the crib to get no- Kobi: That's and then that's what it's coming to. I'm in the house, I'm putting up, I ain't getting no ass. GoFredo: Yeah. LayTheDon: Being in that house and being put up is different. If you're put up, GoFredo: Dalia. LayTheDon: that means you put up for somebody. You're in a relationship. You just in the house. Got you. yeah, remember he said he don't know. Alfredo. Kobi: Okay, I'm in a house. I'm a homebody right now. I ain't been outside. GoFredo: Hey, look. Hey, hey. Hey, well, to answer Lake Hey, y'all, hey, y'all there. Hey, I'm just gonna quickly answer your question. To to be able to do that and still go outside, I don't think so. I I and I ain't gonna lie, I speak for I s I I I will Kev. I ain't gonna lie, I speak for all men because I just don't think it's possible. I think for for you to do that, you gotta have a foundation around you. You gotta one, you gotta have enough money, depending on the age of the child, you gotta have enough money to babysit the child. We living in crazy times now, so you gotta get somebody that's trusted to watch your kids, Kevin: Mm-hmm. GoFredo: no matter what the situation is. So to have your kid five days out the week and work and handle your business and still decide to let's say if I got my daughter, son, or whatever the case like that may be, Monday through Friday, and I get the weekend off, nine times out of ten, I'm not finna I'm not trying to go outside. Like I'm not I ain't even trying to go outside. Just to be honest. Just because of the simple fact you done worked all week and Kobi: You exhaust it. GoFredo: took care of your child, you got it's responsibilities that need to come into place and going outside ain't one of it. Now I ain't saying everyone LayTheDon: songs of bettering. GoFredo: Yeah, I ain't saying I'm inside all day, you know, and all year. It's gonna be certain moments that I do wanna you know, we don't wanna pop out and be an adult basically. But like like how you say like how some of these moms have Homo said something, how some of these dudes is and some of these people is to go outside as often as they do. I ain't with it. And to what to Lei point LayTheDon: Are you keen to support? GoFredo: Yeah, but Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: to to what you said, Lei, I honestly think when it comes down to it, like what you said or not not putting a dude on child support at first and whatnot, I agree with you on that. But I also think it's a mentality thing. And I also believe that I with me personally, I just blame the mother and father when it comes to that. That's why I said to like to to add more context to when I said men and women ain't shit. It's not all. I'm just saying it's just certain people and people know who I'm talking about. It's like, and it's no disrespect. Like, and I know like women gonna kill me for this when I say this, but I've been y'all know I already heard me say this. Hey, that dude that that dude that that that put a baby in you with everything like that, and you coming out here and saying he ain't shit and he ain't this, that, and the third. I ain't gonna lie to you. He wasn't shit from the get-go. And that game that you thought he was saying wasn't real game. You know how many times I didn't I I know this for all three of us, and I mean all four was me included. How many times we talked to our homegirl? LayTheDon: Nah, three, you stay at three, you right. GoFredo: Well I'm saying all well it's technically four was me included, but like we you funny. But we all didn't talk to like our homegirls. LayTheDon: Peace. GoFredo: And and you would be like, hey, what's going on here? And then you'd be like, and you'd be like, girl, he didn't say this, this, this, and this, or hey yo, bro, he done said da-da-da-da. It's like, and you feel for that. And you thought he was telling you the truth. It's like, it's like when a dude pull up in the in a in a hoop there, he telling you it's a beans and you and you believed him. Like, come on now, like it don't make any sense. So like that, so I'm like, I I'm gonna get get flacked for that, but I'm just keeping it a buck because a lot of these niggas ain't got game like they I'm sorry, a lot of these dudes ain't got game like people think they do. Like I hear too many times and that's just be like, come on, man, I got a homegirl that's going through something that's just like you fail for that. He ain't even spit nothing, he ain't even say nothing. I knew he was lying from the get-go, he sold you a dream. You ain't even give him a chance you ain't even give him a chance. Like you ain't even give him a chance to show the real you, to show you the real him. Because he was false flagging all the way through and you fail for it. And that's the same way where it goes for like men. Kobi: that delusion and flaw false flagging. GoFredo: That bro, like that's that that's that's me. I think it's a lot of like y'all know how I feel about it. I think I truly do believe like if if women got if if women as a whole got their act together, they really could run the world. I I I truly believe that. And my honest opinion, only reason I say that is because a man would fall for like a good woman at the end of the day. If the problem is that a dude know if one woman, like, if you ain't going, I go to the next one and she gonna fall for this weak line I'm going with. Some dudes don't even gotta play with some dudes don't even gotta get an elite game if they got it because so many fall in front of just the same old routine. So where it becomes a habit. So that that's that's with me. And I don't think people doing their Car Facts when they land in bed with somebody. LayTheDon: artifacts is crazy, but okay GoFredo: I don't think they Kobi: Yeah, I agree with the carpet. Hey. GoFredo: is. I don't think people let's can we keep it a bug? I don't think they're doing their cough acts. And I think some women is just rooting. LayTheDon: You soon. GoFredo: I think some women is just like some women are just getting pregnant by a dude just because he's financially stable. Or they getting pregnant by a dude just Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: because they in a rel yeah, you see like or they're or they're in a relationship and it's going bad and they hope it'll change them. You know, you got those situations. I think you got too many situations where LayTheDon: They're going both ways. GoFredo: Yeah, you know, or you got the dude that wanna trap a woman because she bad or she thick and this, that, and the third, or she look good, or whatever the case like that, or she financially stable and dude poking holes in kinds. So I think it goes vice versa when it comes to that. I just that's why I say men and women ain't shit when it comes to that. Just because everybody out here playing games and don't nobody really care for the kid. We do live in society where and this this has been in American history where kids don't matter. But everybody say kids the future. I don't I don't I don't think I d if if Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: we look at society as a whole, I don't think people really care about kids as a whole. Just look how society is. Hat pedophiles only getting like probation, two weeks, all this other stuff, two years, and then they out willing and dealing like nothing ever happened. You know? So that's me. That me when it comes to it. But I do think everybody ain't shit though. LayTheDon: I got a question. What do you think is the mentality between people, I can't say couples because they're not together, that continuously having this kids by the same person over and over, not married, not together, child support for all three of them. but still having multiple issues back and forth because one, y'all got kids and you on child support, but y'all keep having kids back to back with the same person. What do you think goes through those Kobi: Places. LayTheDon: people heads specifically? Kobi: Placement. Kevin: it's yeah, yeah, I was gonna I was gonna say, yeah, I I was about to say exactly what you were saying, Covey, complacency. people get so used to the same situation because GoFredo: Mm-hmm. Kevin: you're not it the well I'm I I'm saying like this. The the kids part kinda it is kinda two separate things 'cause when you with the same person for so long, you get complacent and doing the same thing. So like, you know, if you had one kid and It's like kinda cool. A lot of dudes gonna be, I'm gonna have another one, and then they don't care if even another one comes after that because they're complacent with it. You know what I mean? And you haven't required him to take a next step, meaning like you haven't you you've given somebody two, three, four, five, who knows how many kids, and GoFredo: Mm-hmm. Kevin: you're not married or anything that. LayTheDon: No one will be finger-cruised. Kevin: And you're not married because you haven't required them to marry you or anything like that. So If you haven't required it to happen, why would they do it? GoFredo: But but Kev, think of it like this though, bro. They got child support in their back pocket. Because now, like with our court systems now, a lot of women just as soon as it don't work out, they just immediately go to the court system. Like like Lay said, like Kevin: Well well that's LayTheDon: But I'm talking about on the go for it. You got women too. I'm saying the men that have kids with the same women over and over, you still bitching about child support. You didn't have kids with the same person, y'all not together. And you want child support Kevin: Well that's well, I was gonna say LayTheDon: for every goddamn kid. Kevin: What well that's what I'm saying. That well that one like that that one's like a little bit different because I ain't gonna lie, at a certain point, at a certain point it's like, bro, you just you just being kinda dumb. At that at that point, if you just you if you you mean it GoFredo: Yeah. Yeah. Basic yeah, basically. Basically. LayTheDon: That's what I mean. Kevin: like that, like yeah, you just gonna keep having kids the same person. She already put you on on support. You know what I mean? Naturally that's gonna happen at that's gonna happen again. You know, I mean go what is the thing though too. I'm not even gonna say it's just she's gonna keep putting you on. What happens with child support is this, so I well it's different in whatever county you live in, it's different. It's GoFredo: Yeah. Kevin: not even safe to say whatever county you live in is gonna be different. So basically, every like in my county, every three years you're supposed to update like you know what your income is, all those things, right? LayTheDon: Mm-hmm. Kevin: So if you just saying, yeah, now I got this kid. Now I got this kid. It's not that she's necessarily taking you, it might not be necessarily that she's taking you to court, but she's just saying this is what it is now. And the government's going, all right, if that's what it is, then this is what it is now. You know what I mean? So at a certain point, it's like you gotta be smart enough to go, all right, look, like if I'm not gonna be with this person, I don't need to keep having I don't need to keep having kids, period, with anybody I'm not gonna be with. So like these GoFredo: True. Kevin: dudes, like when you have When you have when it it's these guys like you got like three, you know, two, three big moms, I don't really have sympathy for you in that situation at all. I I don't. LayTheDon: at all. Nile. GoFredo: zero zero Kevin: I don't have no sympathy. I don't have sympathy for you. You know what I mean? Especially like let's be real, the child support calculator, it's an algorithm that's saying, now this is one thing I can say I don't agree with about child support per se because it's based on like it's a it's an algorithm that they that they put together. I don't agree that now after a cer after a certain threshold, I don't agree that somebody should be able to tell me this is how much money you should spend on your child. We've all grown up. There's no, there was no there is no math in your house when you were a kid that said your mom had to spend this amount on each kid in order GoFredo: Yeah. Kevin: for you to LayTheDon: Right. Kevin: it that that never happened. That GoFredo: Okay. Kevin: never happened. So I don't agree that the government should be able to say, This is how much money you make this money. This is how much money you should spend on the kid. Because if that was the case, I'd have had a lot more stuff when I was a kid. I'd Kobi: Ha ha ha. Kevin: have had a lot more stuff if that was the case. They they they doing that to me. I'm over about to call my mom up and be like, hey man, I think you missed out on some stuff. I mean you might owe me a check or two. But LayTheDon: What's that? GoFredo: Bro, this man kill. Hey, that's I ain't gonna lie to you, bro. That's that's real talk. I think when it comes to like you said, the dude that goes and have three, four baby mamas, or you know, one baby mama with two, I mean one, yeah, one baby mama got two kids, another baby mama with another kid, and vice versa, or the dude that got one baby mama but had multiple kids with her and still doing dumb stuff like stuff like that. I ain't got no sympathy for them because you continue to keep basically messing up. But I to to to go to what you said, I agree. Our court system is flawed when it comes to that. And I know a lot of, you know, we probably gonna get a lot of flack for this, but at the end of the day it's true. Because it I'm looking at like look at the from the celebrity standpoint and whatnot. Like I a a perfect example to let you know how this is an alarming system. Like y'all remember the the Kim Kardashian and Kanye West dispute that went viral and went crazy. Like he had to pay her basically millions of dollars, like she not already a millionaire. So like what is that money doing for the kid that she Kevin: Right. GoFredo: can't already do financially? Like because our system is set up to where it's like an a it's it's it's basically taking care of like if and this gone from what I've seen. Like it's basically taking care of the mother more than it is the child for a standpoint. Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: Like I d and and I'm just keeping I'm just keeping it at a buck with that. Like I said, I we're gonna get some flack for that. I know I am, but at the end of the day it's true. Because at the nobody's telling a woman to bring her paperwork to to the court anytime she gets child support. Bring all her paperwork, all her files, and everything like that, because the money that gets sent to her for the child is for the child. Now if you spend it on rent, if you spend it in on Your car note, if you spend it on bills around to for your ch that's technically still for your child, that's different. But how many times have we seen Facebook, Instagram, women bragging about they got a check? Hey girl, let's go out. Da da da this, that, and the third. They gone, they putting Kevin: Mm-hmm. GoFredo: it on social media, bragging about it. And at the end of the day, it's like, wait a minute, Joel, you supposed to be how about you take that money and go maybe invest that into your child, put that towards a college fund or anything like that. But at the end of the day, they're using that money to even do something else. And obviously That's not all. But it is cases like that. It is cases and it's too many, to be honest with you, that's like that. That's an alarming rate where it comes to the child support system. That's why I feel like it's flawed. I feel like if a man pays child support, good or bad, whether he's a good father or a bad father, no matter what the situation is, if he paid child support, I think the mother should bring documentation to the court system just like he gotta bring documentation to the court system about him sending her money. Because this dude's out here paying you know, thousand, two, three, three, four thousand dollars in child support. Regular men, I ain't talking about celebrities now, regular men paying that much money in child support and still having to take care of their child. And then people gonna and then women gonna say, well, this they kid, dah dah da, but listen, shorty, you're not doing that. All all your money is going to the child as a whole. Or whatever you bring in is going to yourself and Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: the child. The money that the father brings in, it goes to or the as they call them, the sperm donor father, whatever they want to call it. That money goes to the child and his bill, and he also got to get school clothes, and he also got to get shoes, and he also got to do X, Y, and Z. And when he don't do that, you tell you you going online saying he ain't shit. When you get a check, yeah, money and whatnot. So it's that type of thing for me that's kind of weird. And like I said, I know, you know, it's exceptions to the rules and everything like that, but I do think our system is flawed when it comes to that. I think we can do better. That's what I want to say. Kevin: Yeah. LayTheDon: Quick quick thought I'm pretty sure y'all seen this story, and I just want to get your thoughts on it I can't remember if it was a basketball player or football player That clearly told the woman like yo like they fucked up obviously created a kid and he was like I don't want nothing to do with a kid I don't want nothing to do with a baby mama da da da but obviously they were trying to put him on child support and They gave GoFredo: Basketball Anthony Edwards. LayTheDon: him They gave him what the amount Kevin: I think. LayTheDon: was for 18 years and he wanted to pay all of it up front and the court told him no. GoFredo: No, he no, they let him do it. Kevin: Yeah, yeah, yeah, they let do it. GoFredo: They let him do it. LayTheDon: Okay, Kevin: Yeah, yeah. LayTheDon: so how do y'all feel about the fact that like a child support is supposed to you know, obviously I get it You don't want to do that shit for 18 years and in a sense It's supposed to be the mom's child to be able to allocate that money for you know that 18 years I don't think I don't know how much shit calls between you know, the child born 18 years, but like Do you think that's reasonable to be able to allocate? Set amount of money before 18 years not knowing what the fuck might come up but I get it You don't want nothing to with the kid But like if it's supposed to be some poor supporting the kid that you helped create it like do you I think that was fair Kevin: be honest with you when Kobi: No. Kevin: that situation came up when that situation came up I had I had mixed feelings about it but looking at it realistically I'm cool with it and the reason I'm cool with it in their situation is because let's be honest she went after him for the check she went after GoFredo: Yes. Kevin: him for the check okay it wasn't like you know this was a mutual you know I'm saying somebody he was dating or something like that she went after him for the check She was upset when that decision came because she said, What if he makes more money? She was there for the check. You know what I mean? He gave you plenty LayTheDon: Right. I get that. Kevin: of money. He gave you plenty of money to take care of a kid. And at the end of the day, it's one of those, I'm not, you know what I mean? That's that's his choice. Would I go about it in that way? And like, you know, just be hey, here, take the money. I don't want the kid. No, I wouldn't do that. But respectfully, he said, you know what? I don't really want nothing to do with this kid. This is enough money to take care of the kid. He still took care of his business. So we can't say that he LayTheDon: You did. Kevin: didn't. You know what I mean? Now, the GoFredo: Yeah. Kevin: other side of raising the kid is that kid gonna have who knows what type of you know emotional issues this kid may have, depending on how they come up. Who knows? But as far as did he take care of his business and financially, yeah, he did. She just wasn't happy with the result that she got, but she made a she she made a stupid choice by GoFredo: Mm-hmm. Kevin: engaging in that situation and she got a stupid result. So I'm I'm not really mad at it. GoFredo: You play s hey you play stupid games, you win stupid prizes. Kobi: I Kevin: And be a millionaire. So who and and then you're a millionaire, so so you know what I mean? You got you got plenty of money to live, so GoFredo: Hey, hey, before I let you go, Kobe, listen, she she played around and she found out. And I honestly think what what Anthony Edwards did, I honestly think it changed the game. And I think a lot of we we we'll I think we'll start seeing a lot more celebrities that has that that has that bag LayTheDon: Yep, we shall eat. GoFredo: be able to do that. I think it's gonna be a lot more celebrities or people that got that type of money start doing that or pay maybe pay half. I wouldn't be surprised if we see somebody pay 10 years up front or five years up front and then stack Kevin: Okay. GoFredo: their money up and keep going along the lines from now. Because at end of the day, like like Kev said, she was going for the bag and then she got her bag and it wasn't what she wanted it. Cause she 'cause like she wanted to because at first she wanted to go to Cali instead of Atlanta, where she stayed at, because Cali has a higher child support and it didn't work in her favor. And so he paid it up for 18 years and now it's that. And now to me personally, Like Kev said, it sucks because her dad is Anthony Edwards and you know, she'll probably be able never be able to to see him or be around him because of the decisions the decision that her mother made and this like that toxic energy there between the two of them. And then like for her trying to go back to the court system and everything like that, being mad, trying to, you know, trying to find a loophole and everything like that when, you know, he did his when he technically he did his due diligence. Now is it fair, is it cool? I don't I don't think so because from the child perspective, I think that sucks. But at the end of the day, like he technically did his due diligence. He said he told you what it was and he did what he said. He and like y'all heard what I said the last what two episodes ago. I respect people that stand on business. And he stood ten toes on it. And now you gotta live with the results of that. So that money that you got, because she not broke either, but that money that you got for that, like I said earlier, invest that, flip it, do what you gotta do, maybe put it in her college funds or something like that. LayTheDon: See better than we know, GoFredo: Yeah, you but you gotta make something happen with it. And if we being honest, you know, I know it's a lifestyle being rich and everything like that, but come a million dollars to raise a child for eighteen years, you you gonna be all right. Not including the money you gonna make throughout. So you you should be working. You should be doing something throughout that time. Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: But that's more than enough money to raise your child and handle your business. You got money to fall on. But what what you what you thinking, Kobe? Kobi: I think we all had some good takes on everything that happened. Me and Kev have personal connections to this topic. So we all had some good things to say. I liked everything that we said today. we're gonna wrap it up. This is episode about how society is Huh? Huh? GoFredo: Think twelve. Take twelve. I think twelve, ain't it? Think we had number twelve, ain't it? Kobi: Think so. I think I think we end on episode twelve. Episode twelve. this episode twelve, GoFredo: Okay, Kobi: the end. how is society with the kids? GoFredo: Kid. Kobi: And we we we here it's Foday Change. I want everybody to like, comment, and subscribe and see y'all later.