Latest / The Purpose and Progress Podcast Show / Undefeated: The Psychology of Strong Leadership, Cohesion, and Performance with Al Philip-Neri

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Undefeated: The Psychology of Strong Leadership, Cohesion, and Performance with Al Philip-Neri · The Purpose and Progress Podcast Show

0:00
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: But the reality of being undefeated is,
0:03
it's a mindset. It's a mindset that you will just continue.
0:07
You'll persevere. You're not just going to AKA throw in the
0:11
towel and be like, I'm done. You're going to sit there and be
0:15
like, okay, that was painful. Whether it was emotional,
0:19
physical, financial, spiritual, relational. It was painful, but
0:23
what can I do different next time? What was the lesson that I
0:27
learned that can move the needle forward? Too many people, they
0:32
dwell on on the sorrow. The failure. Well, the failure is a
0:36
failure. It already happened, so it can either dictate. Or you
0:40
can say, okay, next time, I'm going to do this differently. Or
0:44
next time, I'm going to say this. Next time, I'm going to
0:48
try this. Okay, I'm a little bit weak in this area. I need to go
0:53
get guidance, a mentor, a book, a podcast in this area. So the
0:57
reality is, from the failure, the only question I ever tell
1:01
people is, okay, what's next that's going to move the needle
1:05
forward. Period.
1:07
Dr. Jim Price:: Hello, I'm Dr. Jim Price, and welcome to The
1:10
Purpose and Progress Podcast. This is the place where we
1:14
explore how purpose can guide our actions, and how growth can
1:18
become a part of our everyday lives. On the show, I talk with
1:22
amazing guests, from educators and creators to everyday people
1:27
with extraordinary stories about the challenges they face, the
1:31
lessons they've learned, and how to keep moving forward. My goal
1:34
is to share conversations that inspire you to live
1:37
intentionally, embrace growth, and take meaningful steps to
1:41
your own purpose. Let's get started.
1:47
Hello, welcome everyone. I'm your host, Dr. Price. And this
1:51
is The Purpose and Progress podcast show, where we share
1:54
inspirational stories from industry leaders who motivate
1:58
and share their stories to success. Sometimes, we always
2:02
see the success, but we don't know the story behind the
2:04
success, and the obstacles, and the challenges that entail that
2:08
person to get where they're at. Life is always a thing where
2:11
you're learning, growing and nurturing yourself to be better
2:15
and do better. Today is no different. We have a wonderful
2:19
guest. He is a performance psychologist, executive coach,
2:23
and founder of Cohesion HQ, where he helps organizations
2:27
improve leadership, culture, and execution by understanding human
2:31
behavior. Drawing on career spanning correctional
2:34
leadership, higher education, organizational psychology, and
2:39
executive coaching. He shares practical insights on finding
2:43
purpose through adversity, building resilience under
2:46
pressure, why behavior drives performance, and the psychology
2:51
behind effective leadership. As the author of the Execution
2:55
Advantage, brings actionable strategies to help leaders
3:01
achieve stronger teams and more consistent results. I was trying
3:07
to always say the introduction and then say the name, but then
3:09
I said the name. It's all great to have you, . Great to have you
3:14
as a guest today. I'm so happy to have you. How are you? Yeah,
3:17
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: I'm good, man. I'm good. Happy to be here,
3:19
Dr., Dr., Dr., two Dr., right?
3:24
Dr. Jim Price:: It's so glad to have you. I think we wanted to
3:29
touch upon people. I like I talk about people see the success,
3:32
but they don't always know the story. So like with you, what
3:39
inspired and influence you to begin your journey to success to
3:44
get to build into where you are today?
3:47
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: My journey is long, my story's diverse. But
3:50
at the end of the day, if I answer the root question of what
3:54
did it take to create success, and I will just say, you hear
3:59
the word resilience, you hear the word you can't give up, you
4:03
never quit, right? Failure is not an option, things of that
4:07
nature. But the word I use is undefeated. And it's not
4:11
undefeated in the sense of a scoreboard, wins and losses. I
4:15
have had numerous defeats in my life. I mean, numerous. That's
4:19
athletically, career, professional, self-employed, et
4:23
cetera, et cetera. Numerous defeats. But the reality of
4:26
being undefeated is, it's a mindset. It's a mindset that you
4:30
will just continue. You'll persevere. You're not just going
4:35
to, aka, throw in the towel and be like, I'm done. You're gonna
4:39
sit there and be like, okay, that was painful. Painful.
4:43
Whether it was emotional, physical, financial, spiritual,
4:47
relational. It was painful. But what can I do different next
4:51
time? What was the lesson that I learned that can move the needle
4:55
forward? Too many people, they dwell on the sorrow. The
4:59
failure. Well, the failure is a failure. It already happened, so
5:03
it can either dictate. Or you can say, okay, next time I'm
5:07
going to do this differently. Or next time, I'm going to say
5:11
this. Next time, I'm going to try this. Okay, I'm a little bit
5:16
weak in this area. I need to go get guidance, a mentor, a book,
5:20
a podcast in this area. So the reality is, from the failure,
5:23
Dr. Jim Price:: That's such a a critical part where you
5:24
the only question I ever tell people is, okay, what's next
5:28
that's going to move the needle forward? Period. That's it. It's
5:33
that simple. What's next that's going to move the needle
5:36
mentioned that understanding that failures are part of
5:36
forward? Whatever happened, happened.
5:47
success too. You're going to fail at many things before you
5:51
get to that over the hump where you get to success. And I think
5:54
being able to learn from failure is definitely such a critical
5:58
thing. Would you say that's kind of like, in terms of business
6:02
aspects and with personal growth and development, I feel like
6:07
learning from failures is probably a critical thing as
6:11
well in terms of what your experiences have been.
6:15
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: I think you learn from both. You learn from
6:18
failure, and you also learn from success. And I think people say,
6:22
well, it's easy to learn from success. Sure, sure. But it's
6:26
hard to be humble and have humility when you have a lot of
6:30
success. So those are usually the real lessons. Are when you
6:34
have success, it's really about humility, and being humble more
6:38
than it is is the lesson. The lesson usually comes from
6:42
something that hit hard of what you can do different next time.
6:46
So it's weird how success and failure can teach you similarly,
6:50
or it can teach you different depending on your path of
6:54
growth. But you hit the nail on the head, right? If we had a
6:58
long time to go through my whole background, growth is critical.
7:02
But in order to grow, you have to be self-aware. You've got to
7:06
be self-aware. You'll never grow until you're truly honest with
7:10
you. And it's okay to be you. And there's things you do really
7:14
well. There's things that you do average, and there's things
7:18
you're really bad. And it's okay to just be self-aware and say,
7:22
okay, in this endeavor, what do I need to really be good at? And
7:27
then who do I need to surround myself with that's really good
7:31
at all the things that I'm average or not good at? And how
7:35
do I create collaboration? How do I create partnership? How do
7:39
I do that? And a lot of business owners, I feel like, especially
7:43
if finances are hard, right? You can't just throw dollars. And if
7:47
you're starting out, it's tough. I always tell people then to
7:51
look to collaborate. There are people who want to do something,
7:56
but maybe don't quite have the guts to say, I'm going to start
8:00
something by myself. But there are really good right hand man
8:04
per se, or right hand lady per se that know sweat equity can be
8:08
traded out for the greater good, versus it's not like coming out
8:12
of your checkbook because you don't have any money right now
8:16
to be able to pay for somebody, but they've got something that
8:20
could help you move forward. So I always encourage people to
8:24
really go down the lane of collaboration, especially when
8:28
you get started out. And the whole business thing of don't do
8:32
business with your family, whatever. It's actually, don't
8:36
do business with somebody that you can't separate business and
8:40
personal or separate a tie from. That's actually the real truth.
8:44
If both of you are business minded and you can agree that at
8:48
some point a business dissolves, but you can be professional and
8:53
still be at Thanksgiving dinner, cool. Then what's wrong with
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doing business with family? But if you can't, and that gets
9:01
really muddy, then you don't do business with family. So it's
9:05
really unique in this world, or in my journey where I've been
9:09
self-employed for 22 years. And before that, I had a 12 year
9:13
government stint. The things I've seen, the things I've
9:17
learned, I don't always go with kind of like the, what's
9:20
mainstream. And mainstream doesn't always work for all people.
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9:58
That is truth right there. That doesn't always work. Marketing
10:02
and stuff, and promotion, a lot of people don't always know how
10:05
important those things are. And networking too. You mentioned
10:08
about it's important to make those connections. And when
10:11
people feel like they have a connection with you, they're
10:13
more likely to want to do business with you and look into
10:16
whatever you're offering, whether over service or anything
10:19
like that. For you, what probably has been some of the
10:23
hurdles you faced on your path? Maybe hurdle that you can think,
10:26
like, hey, that really taught me a lesson or something. Or I
10:30
learned from that experience to kind of grow and nurture myself
10:34
from that.
10:35
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: Many. But I'll focus on at least one that
10:38
was pretty profound. I was the lead athlete. I fought in the
10:42
ring for a long time. So when I became an entrepreneur, I left
10:46
government service. One of the businesses I wanted opening was
10:50
legit. And then fight came for a long time. I know a lot of
10:54
people, and my father told me, no. He was like, don't do this.
10:58
This is your passion. Go coach for somebody else. Which I was
11:03
already doing. Had been doing. And I was like, I want to do
11:07
this. And so I partnered up. I partnered up with somebody that
11:11
also was a phenomenal athlete and have a lot of experience and
11:15
things that nature. And me and him hadn't really had the right
11:19
discussion. We had many discussions, but we didn't have
11:23
the right discussion. And the right discussion is, what did we
11:27
really want the true focus or value of the gym to be? I
11:31
thought our common ground was we were both competitors, so I
11:35
thought that was our common ground. And that wasn't the
11:39
common ground, but we didn't realize that until after we were
11:43
in a 7 year lease. And so now you're in a 7 year lease, and I
11:47
thought he would want to have a fight team, amateurs, pros,
11:51
etcetera. And he was like, no, no, no, no. I don't want anybody
11:56
to compete. I just want to do it for the fitness, self-confidence
12:00
and things. And I'm like, oh, oh! So that taught me about
12:04
having the right conversation. The right conversation wasn't
12:08
that either one of us were bad business partners or anything
12:12
like that. We just never really had that level of high level
12:16
detail conversation, which you're like, well, why not? I
12:20
don't know. You're going on passion. You're going on
12:24
enthusiasm. You're going on excitement. And then the irony
12:28
was that business is a really hard business to monetize. Okay.
12:32
It's really really difficult. There's a way to do it. There is
12:36
a way to do it, but it's really really difficult to do. But what
12:40
I really realized from that was that I was passing up
12:44
opportunities because I had a schedule. So it's really weird
12:48
because I came out of government, I had a very strict
12:52
schedule, very stringent. Well, I wasn't really, aka,
12:55
entrepreneurial then. I may have tried a side hustle or two.
12:59
Coaching, personal training, stuff like that, but I hadn't
13:03
got in this entrepreneurial jar. So now I'm in this
13:07
entrepreneurial jar, and I'm a believer of the law of
13:10
attraction. You throw yourself out there, man. You throw
13:14
yourself out there enough times. You throw yourself out there
13:18
hundred times. People start to be like, hey, I've got an idea.
13:23
Have you ever thought about, here's an opportunity. Well,
13:27
what happened was the gym consumed a schedule. I had to be
13:31
there. So now, what I really, really learned was I'm not
13:34
telling people not to follow your passion, but I was missing
13:38
opportunity because I had a schedule. So I've started to
13:42
say, okay, when the 7 year lease is over, I'm done. If he wants
13:47
to keep the gym, keep the name, all good. But I'm going to be
13:51
done because I want to be free. And I want to be free to say yes
13:55
to hundred different things that make sense that I want to try to
14:00
experiment with. So the one thing I've been really, really,
14:04
really, really cautious of in the last, I was probably like
14:08
since 2012-ish, I guess that's when our lease expired. Give or
14:12
take. I know I got to work hard, but not when something has a
14:16
strict schedule because I don't really like that. I'm not afraid
14:20
to work hard, but I want to work hard on my terms, my hours that
14:25
mold around family and things that nature, not because the
14:29
doors have to be open. Not telling your audience it's the
14:33
wrong thing, dude. I personally won't ever do a brick and mortar
14:37
business that has hours that you got to be there. And a lot of
14:41
your audience might be like, well, dude, you'd have employees
14:45
until they call in sick, right? And so you got to think through
14:50
these things. I guess to give your audience really the visual
14:54
appeal, think of your average 7/11 or liquor store. Just think
14:58
about it. Something comes to mind. Know it does. I know it
15:02
does. It's pretty much the same family there all the time.
15:06
Whether it's husband, wife, brother, sister, kids, doesn't
15:10
really matter. It's the same family member there all the
15:14
time. Because one of the things in business you have to realize
15:18
is that payroll. So human talent, which is what I
15:21
specialize in, is the biggest line item on your P&L. So the
15:25
way those businesses stay profitable is they keep it very
15:29
family driven. But ask them when is the last time they went on
15:34
vacation, or they went to Disneyland, or they did
15:37
anything? They didn't, because they're in that business with no
15:41
employees, because that is the biggest line item on the P&L. So
15:46
just think about that, audience. Think about that for a few
15:50
seconds, and then start saying, okay, what am I trying to build?
15:54
What am I trying to accomplish? And that might be it, which is
15:58
fine because it's your life. But for those it isn't it, let's
16:02
find a different way, a different path.
16:05
Dr. Jim Price:: Wow. That is so true right there, and it
16:08
resonates heavily. A lot of times, you know, we're looking
16:13
at business in terms of what the outcome can be. But even with
16:19
that, you end up getting tied into your business, and then
16:25
time becomes limited. Now you're in that wheelhouse of just that
16:31
repetitive cycle and stuff like that. And over time, that
16:34
definitely becomes stressful and lead to a lot of things
16:38
happening that maybe you weren't expecting to happen. Life always
16:42
has a sudden that happens unexpectedly that you're just
16:45
not expecting. That thing that just comes out of nowhere, and
16:48
you're like, oh, man, now you have to deal with those aspects
16:51
of whatever the business is and stuff like that. But all of that
16:54
is a part of that whole sphere when you talk about business
16:58
relations and making connections, and networking, and
17:02
growing business, and sacrificing a lot of people.
17:06
They're sacrificing just to thrive in these businesses and
17:10
stuff, and forgetting about self care and being able to do things
17:13
for themselves, and for their family and stuff like that. All
17:17
that resonates heavily. I know you also have the book. I want
17:22
to get into that a little bit. Your book, what that entails.
17:28
Cover that a little bit.
17:30
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: The book is called The Execution Advantage.
17:33
And just in case any anybody's looking it up right now, there
17:37
is another Execution Advantage. But you'll know mine because my
17:41
picture's on, so you'll know mine. So The Execution Advantage
17:45
is basically, what I did is I thought through what I offer
17:51
companies, teams, individuals regarding execution. The end
17:54
result is execution, so that you can have whatever outcome that
17:58
you want. But you got to execute to be able to get the outcome. I
18:02
sat there and say, there's got to be a way for me to
18:07
systematize and compartmentalize into my own frameworks that I
18:12
could then teach, whether it's from the book or workshops, and
18:15
things that nature. So what I did is I started with the first
18:20
pillar in the framework, basically understanding human
18:23
behavior. So you have to truly understand how people are
18:29
naturally wired. Now, how do you do that? There's a million
18:32
different assessments that do that, and I have one if people
18:34
need one. But I'm not going to argue with you about which one's
18:37
the best. Because if you have one, it's okay what do we do
18:40
with this data. And the reality is I want you to take a shift in
18:44
lens on how you look at somebody, and I always use the
18:47
example of being a hand dominant. So I'm left hand
18:51
dominant. I've been writing with my left hand for my whole life.
18:55
Understanding behavior means, how about you have me continue
18:58
write with my left hand all day, every day, in whatever role you
19:01
put me in. The minute you switch me over to my right end, this
19:05
now requires thought behavior modification, stress, panic,
19:11
anxiety. That's what happens when you take somebody out of
19:15
their role of dominance or naturally wired tendencies. You
19:19
create something not pleasurable. This is not
19:23
pleasurable, and it's going to take me a lot of time to perfect
19:27
this to the level of perfection this has. You as a leader, as a
19:31
coach, as a CEO, are you really going to wait 50 plus years for
19:36
me to perfect writing with my right hand? Absolutely not,
19:40
because that doesn't make sense in your business. So how about
19:42
we figure out how to get people on the right bus, in the right
19:45
seat? So that's what I talk about in the first pillar of the
19:48
framework. So that's the applied behavioral psychologist in me.
19:53
Pillar 2 is alignment. So now that you've got people on the
19:59
right, in the right seat, how do you align them? That was my PhD
20:03
research. My PhD research was all about how to create cohesion
20:07
in high-stake environments. So I came out of government service,
20:10
special operations, ran a juvenile prison, elite
20:13
athletics. We always had high stress going on. So knowing that
20:19
we were aligned was really, really important. But guess
20:22
what? Nobody ever gives anybody a playbook on how to create
20:25
cohesion. Right now, the buzzword is culture. Well,
20:28
culture is a result. It's a result of something. You can
20:33
have good culture, bad culture. It's a result of something. So
20:37
the reality is you want to go after having strong cohesive
20:41
unit. So my framework, I have 5 pillars in the framework that
20:46
teaches somebody how to create a cohesive unit. Okay, great. So
20:50
we got the right people in the right bus. We've got them
20:52
aligned. Oh, that's perfect. Well, now we got to pressure
20:56
test them. Because when things get crazy is when people fall
21:01
apart, when things break down. So now I say, guess what? We got
21:06
to come in and got to apply pressure. And so most people
21:09
were like, why is this guy talking about pressure? No, man.
21:12
I just go to work to work. I don't want pressure. Okay, cool.
21:16
That's because you're looking at pressure through a negative
21:18
lens. How about we look through pressure as a positive lens. So
21:22
I use the example all the time of a 5 year old riding a bike,
21:25
learning how to ride a bike. So for those of you in your
21:27
audience that are parents, at one point, if your child is
21:31
5-ish, give or take, you're teaching them how to ride a
21:33
bike, right?Some may be four, some may be six, some might be
21:37
10, whatever. But you're teaching them how to ride a
21:40
bike, and that is stressful to you and the kid. But it's also
21:44
exciting. And then the training wheels have to come off, and you
21:48
got to teach them to break, break, break. And you got to
21:50
teach them how to push the pedals backwards to break. But
21:53
what I ask you as a leader, as a parent is, what is your
21:56
attitude? It's encouraging, it's patient. You don't put some
22:01
crazy unreasonable deadline on. You don't expect perfection
22:05
today. You expect for them to fail. You expect for them to
22:08
want to quit. But your attitude towards all of that is what?
22:13
Mature, encouraging, loving, kind. I'm not talking about
22:20
decreasing standards. You want the child to be able to ride the
22:23
bike, right? And then you want to be able to teach a child how
22:26
to ride uphill, downhill. Eventually, they're going to
22:28
ride to school, whatever the case may b, the grocery store,
22:30
whatever, cornerstone. But it's your attitude. So imagine if you
22:34
pressure as growth. So leaders, what if we come in and we apply
22:39
systematic, deliberate, calculated, calibrated pressure
22:43
so your team can grow? And you know what ends up happening?
22:47
Just like what happens on the bike and the parents, is you end
22:50
up creating trust. Because you, as a parent, have to trust your
22:53
child that they can go ride the bike in the neighborhood.
22:56
Correct, that they can ride the bike to school. That they can
22:59
ride the bike to the corner store. You have to have trust.
23:01
If not, you're not going to ever let you get do it. Well, what if
23:04
your team, through applying deliberate, calculated,
23:07
calibrated pressure, has trust for one another? That is now
23:12
collective. And that is the theory I used in my PhD
23:16
research. Is this is how we create trust? A collective
23:19
trust. Now, when you have trust on top of people being in the
23:23
right bus, in the right seat, and they're aligned, and now you
23:26
have trust because they can handle pressure, you know what
23:30
you can do? You can predict execution. When you can predict
23:33
execution, you can predict scale. When you can predict
23:36
scale, you can get the outcome you want. Period. That's what
23:39
the book talks about.
23:40
Dr. Jim Price:: Wow, that's something amazing. Sometimes,
23:46
people don't always understand how human behavior influences a
23:50
lot of the things that we do. Everyday, our social
23:53
interactions that we have with others influences how people
23:56
envision and see us and things of that nature. And I think it's
23:59
amazing how your book structures and pillars in that way, where
24:03
people can get like a real clear indication of of learning about
24:07
that, and learn about the structure of human behavior. And
24:11
even with the aspect of the team, you mean unity and trust,
24:15
being able to build trust, that is so huge. Even me, the thing
24:19
that I see at school, we build trust with the staff, with the
24:23
kids, with the students. Such a big thing. It's such a big. I'm
24:28
so glad that you were able to share that a little bit. If the
24:33
audience wanted to get a hold of your work, where could they go
24:38
to be able to purchase your work and connect with you?
24:40
Dr. Al Philip-Neri:: Yeah. So to purchase the book, it's on
24:42
Amazon. I don't have it on Audible, so don't beat me up.
24:46
But it is there. You can also go to theexecutionadvantage.com,
24:49
and that'll take you to the correct link of the book. So
24:52
theexecutionadvantage.com. So if you want to buy the book, and I
24:55
do get asked this question, can I read the book and implement
24:58
what you're talking about? Yeah. For the most part, if you've
25:01
already got an analytics tool and things that nature,
25:04
absolutely. Now, to purchase me, as you put it, your best way to
25:10
purchase me or to connect with me is LinkedIn. I'm the only ,
25:15
so you're not going to be competing, or wondering, or
25:17
anything like that. I look how I look, so you're not going to get
25:21
that mistaken either. Dr. Al Philip-Neri on LinkedIn, connect
25:26
with me, send me a message. Again, I work with companies,
25:29
the whole organization, C-suite, middle managers, teams, athletic
25:33
teams, individuals. The one thing I have not done is
25:38
pigeonhole myself in a box regarding who I will help and
25:42
who I will serve, so ERG groups, etcetera. I'm all about, if I
25:46
can help you get from here to here, which is execution by
25:50
using my framework, then that's what we will do. And whether
25:55
that's a workshop, a year's worth of workshops, consulting,
25:59
Zoom, like I told you, I would not pigeonhole myself to a
26:03
schedule, or pigeonhole myself in a box. I'm here to serve your
26:08
audience that best fits for what their needs are, and what their
26:12
company or the team's needs are.
26:15
Dr. Jim Price:: Absolutely. This has definitely been a
26:17
stimulating and thought provoking conversation. And I
26:21
think it's always people who are in the business world and are
26:24
thinking about the aspects of how things carry over into
26:27
building trust and all those things. I think your book and
26:30
your work is definitely speaking volumes in that direction to
26:34
help others. And hat's what it's about, helping others to see
26:38
their value, see their worth, and things like that. So this
26:40
has been such a great motivational conversation. But
26:44
like always, I want our audience to definitely pull pieces of
26:48
everything here together and go out and purchase, connect and
26:52
purchase, and make those moves to better your company, better
26:55
yourself, and work on your own growth. So absolutely,
26:58
definitely appreciate you having on being on the show, Dr. Neri.
27:02
It's definitely been a great conversation. And as always,
27:06
it's about motivation and growth, personal growth, and
27:09
understanding your worth, and all those things that entail
27:12
becoming better each day. Like always, I say to stay prayed up,
27:18
and stay blessed. And once again, this is The Purpose and
27:21
Progress Podcast Show with your host Dr. Jim Price, and we'll
27:24
see you next time. Bye bye.
27:29
Thank you for joining me on this episode of The Purpose in
27:32
Progress Podcast. I hope today's conversation gave you insight,
27:36
inspiration, or a fresh perspective to help you move
27:39
forward with purpose. If you enjoyed the episode, please
27:42
subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who could
27:45
use a little encouragement. You can also support the podcast
27:49
through the donation link in the show notes. Every contribution
27:52
helps us keep sharing stories that uplift and inspire.
27:55
Remember, your purpose is waiting, and progress never
27:58
stops. I'll see you next time.