Latest / Be It Till You See It / 718. Success Is Just Being Aware of How We Feel

Transcript

718. Success Is Just Being Aware of How We Feel · Be It Till You See It

0:00
[SPEAKER_02]: What if success isn't about discipline?
0:03
[SPEAKER_02]: What if we didn't actually need like get more discipline and just get more, just buckle down and get everything right?
0:12
[SPEAKER_01]: And what if that wasn't what we did?
0:13
[SPEAKER_02]: What if actually what we needed is just some more regulation.
0:17
[SPEAKER_01]: Welcome to the be it till you see it podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring.
0:24
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm also Logan, prize instructor, and fitness business coach.
0:28
[SPEAKER_01]: I've trained thousands of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt.
0:36
[SPEAKER_01]: My friends, action brings clarity.
0:40
[SPEAKER_01]: and it's the antidote to fear.
0:43
[SPEAKER_01]: Each week my guess will bring bold, executable, intrinsic, and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it until you see it.
0:52
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a practice, not a perfect, let's get started.
1:00
[SPEAKER_02]: Hey, be a babe, what if what if success isn't about discipline, what if we didn't actually need like get more discipline and just get more just buckle down and and get everything right and what if that wasn't what we did what if actually what we needed is just more regulation, you know.
1:21
[SPEAKER_02]: Hi, I'm Russell Ogan.
1:22
[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to be able to tell you see it podcast.
1:23
[SPEAKER_02]: I am doing a solo episode this week and it's about regulation and this comes actually because we've had some got some great episodes coming out, where we're talking about like midlife, period of pause, because all the things that makes life life, but you know,
1:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm increasingly aware of all the podcasts I've done where people ask me what like success means to me and it's really funny because whenever I answer like oh I'm doing that right now my success is being in control of my own schedule and really if we think about it success is just like being aware of how we feel right and so look I will say like I was a
2:07
[SPEAKER_02]: As a kid, I remember when my speech therapist met with me and they were like, okay, we want to work with you.
2:14
[SPEAKER_02]: That's like, oh, I couldn't possibly work with you.
2:16
[SPEAKER_02]: I have so-and-classes on these days.
2:18
[SPEAKER_02]: I have dance class on these days.
2:19
[SPEAKER_02]: I have gymnastics on these days.
2:20
[SPEAKER_02]: I have softball on these days.
2:21
[SPEAKER_02]: I have, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I
2:30
[SPEAKER_02]: So, and then in high school, I had a job as soon as they let me have a work permit.
2:34
[SPEAKER_02]: So I had I was in sports.
2:35
[SPEAKER_02]: I had a job and you know, I was taking AP classes like always been a busy person.
2:42
[SPEAKER_02]: And, you know, what happened is you go through your life and then systems don't work anymore and the thing is is that, you know, what we know is that after 36 you're probably in some parent and a puzzle state, so my only lovely, so we're younger, yes, it's coming.
2:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Those of you who are on the other side, hey, we go, but things change and we have an episode on astrologically like also about things change and.
3:06
[SPEAKER_02]: The thing that's so weird about being at a certain age is that you can have achieved so much and then you can still blame yourself for having not enough discipline, or lacking discipline, or lacking organization, or will power motivation when you feel stuck, or you hit a wall, or you feel overwhelmed.
3:26
[SPEAKER_02]: And then what happens is we want to go buy another planner or we send it for another course, or we just knew we could up earlier, or we go into this weird shame cycle, and then that kind of feels good.
3:39
[SPEAKER_02]: Like there was this, I remember someone showed me a meme, it was, I'm amazing.
3:44
[SPEAKER_02]: And then it goes, I suck, this sucks.
3:48
[SPEAKER_02]: I can't do this.
3:49
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't know what I'm doing.
3:50
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm amazing.
3:51
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
3:51
[SPEAKER_02]: It's like this like creatives like cycle and the reality is it's like sometimes we do that.
3:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, all this all the stuff is going wrong.
3:58
[SPEAKER_02]: I just like discipline.
3:59
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to get another planner.
4:01
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to sign up for these things.
4:02
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to do this and okay now I feel better because we took some action and action always bring clarity.
4:07
[SPEAKER_02]: So it does make things feel better, but it doesn't actually.
4:11
[SPEAKER_02]: It doesn't, it just becomes part of this cycle that will just keep repeating itself because it's not about the discipline, right?
4:19
[SPEAKER_02]: It's, this is, this is not a character flaw you have.
4:23
[SPEAKER_02]: When we go into these spirals, it's often just a biological state.
4:27
[SPEAKER_02]: It's a dis-regulated state, right?
4:29
[SPEAKER_02]: And I wanted to say, we will talk about this more, but I am not saying, I'm not suggesting that I am regulated all the time.
4:41
[SPEAKER_02]: I do want to acknowledge that like, oh, awareness is key.
4:44
[SPEAKER_02]: And being aware of when these things are happening is the first thing you can do, right?
4:48
[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm teaching people how to teach Pilais for the first time.
4:53
[SPEAKER_02]: And some people already have been teaching a little bit, but now they're going through comprehensive training with me.
4:57
[SPEAKER_02]: And you can't know all that stuff.
4:59
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, I can talk to you about it, but like first, you have to, you just have to be aware that that is the side kicks and you're seeing something happen.
5:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Like you have to start there, right?
5:08
[SPEAKER_02]: So that's where we're gonna start.
5:10
[SPEAKER_02]: There are two versions of you.
5:10
[SPEAKER_02]: My love, there is a regulated you.
5:12
[SPEAKER_02]: And that you, you know that you, that's the you that's common.
5:15
[SPEAKER_02]: As I said, that does take the messy action or like the first next step.
5:19
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's almost like people like throw in tennis balls at you and you're like whackin' them back.
5:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Right, whackin' them back.
5:24
[SPEAKER_02]: I love a regulated me.
5:25
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, woo, my inbox is at zero.
5:29
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, you need that.
5:29
[SPEAKER_02]: I'll get that to, no problem.
5:31
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't go, oh my god, they need that thing right now.
5:33
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, oh, yeah, no problem.
5:34
[SPEAKER_02]: Here you go.
5:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Here's this.
5:35
[SPEAKER_02]: How many of you do these things?
5:36
[SPEAKER_02]: The regulated me is,
5:38
[SPEAKER_02]: not dilulu, but definitely at ease able to take on hard things.
5:45
[SPEAKER_02]: Excited by what I'm saying.
5:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, too.
5:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Not annoyed by requests from people that are last fucking minute.
5:50
[SPEAKER_02]: The regulated me is like, oh, you want this?
5:52
[SPEAKER_02]: I can take this on.
5:53
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, yeah, no, I'll go do that.
5:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, oh, I'll all do seven more new things.
5:56
[SPEAKER_02]: The regulated me is just feels at ease with things.
6:00
[SPEAKER_02]: And
6:01
[SPEAKER_02]: doesn't have this like, put the fuck, right?
6:06
[SPEAKER_02]: It's so funny when when my husband freaks out about the internet and on his office, and I'm like, oh my god, can you calm down?
6:13
[SPEAKER_02]: I can hear it across the house.
6:15
[SPEAKER_02]: And then of course, there's the other side.
6:16
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, there's a disfigulated view.
6:18
[SPEAKER_02]: There's a disfigulated, made me.
6:20
[SPEAKER_02]: The one that gets overwhelmed, trapped in task process, mindlessly scrolling, or over, like, you can over snack, or you can do seven other things, but the thing you need to do, or
6:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Why is this computer not working?
6:34
[SPEAKER_02]: And so can you think about like a time like that?
6:36
[SPEAKER_02]: I'll just say when I get disregulated when a few things happen all the same time.
6:42
[SPEAKER_02]: So my sleep goes bad.
6:45
[SPEAKER_02]: And then because my sleep goes bad, I don't really feel good in my movement.
6:48
[SPEAKER_02]: And so I tell myself, oh, I don't need to move because I didn't sleep very well.
6:53
[SPEAKER_02]: That's probably true.
6:54
[SPEAKER_02]: But then I'm, you know, I'll just start work early.
6:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Wrong, wrong, always the wrong answer.
7:01
[SPEAKER_02]: I should not do that.
7:02
[SPEAKER_02]: I should do something else that is forming to regulate myself.
7:05
[SPEAKER_02]: So that when I do go to work at their normal time, I would actually see all the things as the regulated version of me, right?
7:12
[SPEAKER_02]: But of course, now we're tired.
7:13
[SPEAKER_02]: Now we didn't fill our cup.
7:15
[SPEAKER_02]: And now we're seeing things.
7:16
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's like, why is this person understand that?
7:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Why is this?
7:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Why is this going on?
7:19
[SPEAKER_02]: When you feel yourself like, why are they?
7:21
[SPEAKER_02]: Why is that person?
7:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Why is this person?
7:23
[SPEAKER_02]: When you're upset in the car and traffic?
7:25
[SPEAKER_02]: It's a dysregulated, you babe.
7:27
[SPEAKER_02]: Right, and it's not that you need more discipline.
7:31
[SPEAKER_02]: So biological state and what we need is to figure out what are regulated and dysregulated states.
7:39
[SPEAKER_02]: Look like, feel like sound like, smell like, just noting the things, so that we can be aware.
7:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Because until we are aware, we can't change anything.
7:49
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
7:50
[SPEAKER_02]: And I just want to also add my loves who are getting late diagnosed ADHD.
7:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Hello, I see you late diagnosed, ADHD.
7:58
[SPEAKER_02]: The reality is I thought I was going crazy.
8:02
[SPEAKER_02]: I was like, why all the sense of frustrated by all these things?
8:05
[SPEAKER_02]: Why am I getting irritated about this thing?
8:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Why is that?
8:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Is this a pyramid of pauses?
8:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Because this sucks.
8:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And when I found out, I was like, no, this is my brain's operating system.
8:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Am I ADHD people?
8:16
[SPEAKER_02]: You will just go by another journal.
8:18
[SPEAKER_02]: That is not the next thing.
8:19
[SPEAKER_02]: You should do, because you're probably, you know, you got to stack of them.
8:22
[SPEAKER_02]: You don't use, but you're like, oh, pretty journal, that is.
8:25
[SPEAKER_02]: I have pretty journals that are just for decor.
8:26
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't even try to write in them anymore.
8:28
[SPEAKER_02]: I am aware that I'm buying them just for the look of it.
8:31
[SPEAKER_02]: our nervous system is functioning differently.
8:34
[SPEAKER_02]: And it does things outside of what we often desire, does like a dopamine hype.
8:40
[SPEAKER_02]: I will tell you right now, there's a lot of things that I do, just for the dopamine of it all, and having awareness around that really does help.
8:46
[SPEAKER_02]: But our brain is also three steps ahead of everyone, right?
8:50
[SPEAKER_02]: Like my psychiatrist said, I can help you focus, but I can't keep you from saying, yes, to things you don't have time for.
8:57
[SPEAKER_02]: And so really understanding yourself is one of the most important things I could say you need to do in order to feel successful, right?
9:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Because again, we could define success as whatever it is.
9:11
[SPEAKER_02]: But if you are dysregulated, you're always gonna feel like you're not successful.
9:15
[SPEAKER_02]: right, if you're unaware of how you operate on what you need, right?
9:19
[SPEAKER_02]: So systems really, really work.
9:22
[SPEAKER_02]: My ADHD people I know you don't want them, but they really, really work.
9:24
[SPEAKER_02]: But also, even if you don't have ADHD, if you are bouncing, pairing it up with kids and your aging parents and you run your own business or you work for a high stress business or all of us in this life.
9:39
[SPEAKER_02]: There's a lot of life going on and I just want to say, you know, I don't have children and my parents are independent right now.
9:45
[SPEAKER_02]: So I have more time than my friends who are older than me.
9:50
[SPEAKER_02]: who don't have kids, but their parents are aging.
9:53
[SPEAKER_02]: And they have more needs.
9:54
[SPEAKER_02]: And my friends are in a different place in their life about what they're thinking about, what they're planning for, what versus me, like they are getting ready for retirement.
10:01
[SPEAKER_02]: I am still building that.
10:02
[SPEAKER_02]: So we often compare ourselves to other people in our life and we have to be really mindful of that.
10:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Right?
10:08
[SPEAKER_02]: I also don't get to blame myself, well, you don't have to kid.
10:10
[SPEAKER_02]: So you should have time for this.
10:11
[SPEAKER_02]: That's not healthy either.
10:12
[SPEAKER_02]: My loves who don't have children.
10:14
[SPEAKER_02]: We have to be honest with all of us have so many
10:21
[SPEAKER_02]: If we are operating from a regulated state, when we're answering questions or answering requests, we will actually give a better answer to those things so that we actually can stay regulated.
10:33
[SPEAKER_02]: But when we are in a disfiguration and we're trying to do all these things one, we're not doing out of place a love.
10:38
[SPEAKER_02]: That is for sure not happening.
10:39
[SPEAKER_02]: There is no love in a different disfigulated state.
10:41
[SPEAKER_02]: And we start to just get overwhelmed by the mundane, the things that we have to do every day anyways, right?
10:47
[SPEAKER_01]: So, I just want to say that because I know that there's a lot of people who just have a lot and they're like, okay, just need this one more.
10:52
[SPEAKER_02]: I just need one thing that will make this easier.
10:54
[SPEAKER_02]: They're probably isn't, but if you can be aware of what you need to do to feel like you're coming from a regulated state, then you are going to be able to make decisions from better place.
11:07
[SPEAKER_01]: And sometimes those decisions are to say, no, right?
11:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And then those who love Pilais, I do want to
11:15
[SPEAKER_02]: When we do our Pilates, if we are just doing choreography, that will be like a dis-regulated state.
11:24
[SPEAKER_02]: For example, you're doing the 100 and the carrot is bouncing everywhere or you're on the mat and your head is bouncing everywhere.
11:29
[SPEAKER_02]: That is not regulated.
11:30
[SPEAKER_02]: That is not connected.
11:32
[SPEAKER_02]: But you're doing the 100 and the carrot doesn't move.
11:33
[SPEAKER_02]: You're doing the 100 and everything feels strong.
11:35
[SPEAKER_02]: It's hard.
11:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Life is hard.
11:38
[SPEAKER_02]: But it feels possible.
11:40
[SPEAKER_02]: I think that that is where I'm
11:43
[SPEAKER_02]: we can all wrap our brains around.
11:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Life isn't gonna feel easy and then hard in an easy and hard.
11:49
[SPEAKER_02]: It can actually feel hard all the time, but possible, like you're in control of how you feel and how you operate in it, right?
11:58
[SPEAKER_02]: So I've been mentioning and regulated and dysregulate, but like maybe we need to talk about what it looks like.
12:03
[SPEAKER_02]: So a lot of people might think dysregulated is just like a tip or tantrum.
12:07
[SPEAKER_02]: But the, and I have those, like sometimes I'm like, I just want to have a temper tantrum, like a three year old.
12:12
[SPEAKER_02]: There's something that feels really good about screaming right now.
12:16
[SPEAKER_02]: but it also can be hyper arousal, like fight or flight, right, compulsively overworking or micromanaging people or having this invisible clock of anxiety, you're feeling rushed to do things but like, you made up the deadline or there is no deadline.
12:31
[SPEAKER_02]: I will also say, if you read the big leap, we talk about this that book a lot on this podcast episode 400 is author and you know, when I'm dysregulated, I will tend to worry about things I have no control over.
12:44
[SPEAKER_02]: And then I will also look for all the things that haven't been done.
12:49
[SPEAKER_02]: They're all these are all so all bad.
12:51
[SPEAKER_02]: By the way, that's all going to happen and none of this is done.
12:54
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's like right, none of those things are done, but that doesn't have anything to do with what could go wrong here.
13:00
[SPEAKER_02]: And has nothing to do with the thing we need to work on.
13:02
[SPEAKER_02]: But I will just pile it on.
13:06
[SPEAKER_02]: You can have hypo arousal, though that's a freezer fun state.
13:10
[SPEAKER_02]: So procrastination does the guys is researching or people pleasing to avoid conflict or, you know, just taking up a couch state, right?
13:19
[SPEAKER_02]: And going, oh, I'll just, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm creating, I'm percolating, right?
13:23
[SPEAKER_02]: So you can be dysregulated in calm, looking calm, but really, you're not working on the thing you want to be doing, right?
13:31
[SPEAKER_02]: Does that make sense?
13:36
[SPEAKER_02]: will play a video game when I am feeling out of sorts because there's something about moving these colors around that helps bring my heart right down and bring me into a different place and then I can go, okay, hold on, what am I avoiding?
13:55
[SPEAKER_02]: So I just want to say, it's okay to end up doing those things.
14:00
[SPEAKER_02]: But being aware of that, what you're doing is what you're doing.
14:03
[SPEAKER_02]: It's really, really important.
14:04
[SPEAKER_02]: I think a lot of times we go through life very unaware, right?
14:08
[SPEAKER_02]: In Pilates, if I tell someone, you know, to pull their shoulders back there, there is far back as they can go.
14:14
[SPEAKER_02]: That person is unaware that their shoulders are very much forward.
14:18
[SPEAKER_02]: And they don't have the ability to pull them back.
14:20
[SPEAKER_02]: So I have to first make them aware of what
14:23
[SPEAKER_02]: back means because they think back is what they're doing, but it's not.
14:27
[SPEAKER_02]: And then I have to help them.
14:29
[SPEAKER_02]: Right?
14:30
[SPEAKER_02]: And you know, there's a perfectionist shut down cycle that also happens, right?
14:35
[SPEAKER_02]: You set some impossible standard.
14:38
[SPEAKER_02]: Hi, see you.
14:38
[SPEAKER_02]: This is all or nothing.
14:40
[SPEAKER_02]: Mine set.
14:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Then you can't meet it.
14:42
[SPEAKER_01]: Then you panic.
14:44
[SPEAKER_01]: And then you just shut down and give up.
14:47
[SPEAKER_02]: And you have to note telling anybody about that thing that you're going to do because then you can go to the cycle
14:54
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
14:56
[SPEAKER_02]: I see you.
14:56
[SPEAKER_02]: I've been there.
14:57
[SPEAKER_02]: I understand, you know, I'm going to go the gym every single day.
15:02
[SPEAKER_02]: Then the first day you hit traffic.
15:04
[SPEAKER_02]: There's a new construction site.
15:06
[SPEAKER_02]: You get there.
15:06
[SPEAKER_02]: You forgot your pants.
15:07
[SPEAKER_02]: So now you can't do anything.
15:09
[SPEAKER_02]: And you're like, this didn't work at all.
15:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And then you shame blame yourself.
15:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Then you have a shit day.
15:13
[SPEAKER_02]: And then you, you didn't do enough reflection on how to solve the problem for tomorrow.
15:18
[SPEAKER_02]: So then tomorrow comes and you're like, I can't do it.
15:22
[SPEAKER_01]: it's not fun.
15:24
[SPEAKER_02]: So here's what we have to do.
15:25
[SPEAKER_02]: We actually have to redefine the goal of what we're trying to achieve in regulation and also probably what successes for us, right?
15:35
[SPEAKER_02]: So I wanted to say that being regulated does not mean that we are a monk who never gets upset that is crazy and unattainable.
15:45
[SPEAKER_01]: unattainable.
15:47
[SPEAKER_01]: Come on, unattainable.
15:49
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
15:49
[SPEAKER_02]: I have seen monks in an I am impressed by them, but you guys, they have nothing else to do, but be regulated and calm as fuck.
15:57
[SPEAKER_02]: They have nothing else to do.
15:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Someone else makes sure that they are fed, so I make sure that they have clothing, so I make sure that they have a roof over head.
16:03
[SPEAKER_02]: They have nothing to do with prey and meditate.
16:07
[SPEAKER_02]: You, my love, are not a monk.
16:08
[SPEAKER_02]: You have so many things to do on top of it, so it's not about someone
16:14
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's also important that we talk about the success and being regulated is not the absence of triggers.
16:21
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't like when people say you triggered me because that's not real unless someone actually knows what your triggers are and does it on purpose.
16:27
[SPEAKER_02]: But yes, you can be activated, how my therapist would call it activated over trigger, but you can be activated by something I say or do.
16:36
[SPEAKER_02]: And that doesn't mean you are unsuccessful or you are like, I'm not a regular person.
16:40
[SPEAKER_02]: No, it's actually the speed of what you acknowledge it and then recover.
16:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
16:45
[SPEAKER_02]: So today I had some bad news that came before I had the record on this and it really sent me to state and I saw myself wanting to spiral worse than the thing that I was made aware of.
16:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
16:56
[SPEAKER_02]: And I was like, hold on.
16:59
[SPEAKER_02]: Hold on, we don't have to go there.
17:00
[SPEAKER_02]: That has nothing to do with the thing that's making us sad right now.
17:04
[SPEAKER_02]: And we can feel those feelings take a moment.
17:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Let's think of all the things we can do to maybe be part of solving that problem.
17:14
[SPEAKER_02]: And also, it wasn't my problem to solve, so I really actually have to fill my feelings.
17:19
[SPEAKER_02]: And send someone good hope.
17:21
[SPEAKER_02]: And then I have to go back to the thing, right?
17:26
[SPEAKER_02]: Because if I let this thing derail my whole day, then I'm even more behind.
17:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And then what am I going to do?
17:32
[SPEAKER_02]: Probably go through that chain perfectionist cycle.
17:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Now, if what was going on, I had control of taking action, then taking action would be the step to take, and I might still be behind, but I actually can acknowledge that I was because I was taking some action to solve the problem.
17:45
[SPEAKER_02]: But it's the speed at which you actually acknowledge a difference.
17:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Right, I have somebody in my mentorship program who's like, I want to stop negative self-talk.
17:51
[SPEAKER_02]: You're probably not going to stop that, but what you can do is get faster at catching how that you are.
17:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
17:58
[SPEAKER_02]: So how long does it take you?
18:00
[SPEAKER_02]: So right now is it taking you 20 minutes, 10 minutes to realize you're doing some negative stuff talk.
18:06
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, can we can we get that to be a little shorter and a little shorter and then eventually you say the first line like so up right back.
18:12
[SPEAKER_02]: I think how quickly can you recover if you know what your activators are.
18:19
[SPEAKER_02]: What boundaries can you put in place?
18:21
[SPEAKER_02]: Can't put boundaries in place?
18:22
[SPEAKER_02]: That person or that thing's gonna activate you?
18:24
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, I quickly can you acknowledge that and go through recovery so that it doesn't derail you.
18:28
[SPEAKER_02]: So it doesn't put you in just regular state.
18:30
[SPEAKER_02]: It can still upset you, it can still frustrate you, it can still fill your feelings, but to literally take you off your course, my love at such a bummer, right?
18:39
[SPEAKER_02]: That'd be such a bummer because then the things that you're here on this planet to do, you and Billa do, right?
18:44
[SPEAKER_02]: And there's another way to redefine the goal.
18:47
[SPEAKER_02]: It's called a gateway effect.
18:48
[SPEAKER_02]: You cannot access creativity, strategic decision making our genuine confidence when your body thinks a tiger is chasing it.
18:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Our lizard brain goes into flight or fight or is searching out for an ant tiger that's going to eat it.
19:02
[SPEAKER_02]: And when that's where your brain is at, you can't be creative.
19:05
[SPEAKER_01]: Impossible.
19:06
[SPEAKER_01]: You're trying to survive.
19:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Trying to survive.
19:10
[SPEAKER_02]: So I see this a lot.
19:12
[SPEAKER_02]: The time that I'm recording this, there's a lot of people who are upset about in my industry about something that was posted that I have known, no, nothing about nor did I seek out because they do not care.
19:22
[SPEAKER_02]: because going and seeking that out would just dysregulate me.
19:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Because of course, I would get up step by what I saw.
19:28
[SPEAKER_02]: And then it would make me sad about people.
19:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And then it make me worry about how this could negatively affect my business.
19:33
[SPEAKER_02]: And then it make me worry about my financials.
19:34
[SPEAKER_02]: And then it make me worry about my life future.
19:36
[SPEAKER_02]: And then it make me go, why am I even trying this new thing that people could be so shitty about?
19:38
[SPEAKER_02]: So I don't go look at that stuff, but I am made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made of made
19:48
[SPEAKER_02]: And the thing that I found was that so many people were fighting me on seeing the thing, because I wrote this post about being in a creative practice and not judgment and blah, blah, knowing why you're teaching and not caring who is a person who trained you.
20:05
[SPEAKER_02]: And I notice how many people wanted to fight me on how it needs to be louder for those people who need to hear it.
20:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm like, well, they don't want to hear it.
20:14
[SPEAKER_01]: They're in a state they don't want to eat.
20:15
[SPEAKER_01]: Why would they listen to me?
20:16
[SPEAKER_01]: They don't want to be there.
20:17
[SPEAKER_02]: They want to be in their awful world.
20:20
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's interesting that you want to be in that awful world with them.
20:23
[SPEAKER_02]: You're letting them do that to you.
20:25
[SPEAKER_02]: When you could just put blinders on and go, that's for those people over there.
20:27
[SPEAKER_02]: That seems to go crazy.
20:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Why would I even give them any attention because I have an impact to make over here?
20:32
[SPEAKER_02]: So if you keep opening up your socials and the things that you see are causing your brain to go into a tiger's chasing me, you've got to change your algorithm, I love that world is shit, right, I get that and you know what I really struggled in the last couple of years.
20:52
[SPEAKER_02]: with promoting things that will help people because like, there are people dying.
20:56
[SPEAKER_02]: There's genocide's happening all the time.
20:58
[SPEAKER_02]: And so every time I open my phone, this person fucking did this, these people died.
21:02
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's not that I can't, I don't care about that stuff.
21:04
[SPEAKER_02]: It's that I have to make sure I only see that stuff after I've done the things that I can do.
21:10
[SPEAKER_02]: Because I actually don't get to side who the leaders are.
21:14
[SPEAKER_02]: In those cases, because I voted as fuck as hard as I could, you know, and I have to go, what can I do?
21:20
[SPEAKER_02]: So I walked dogs for a shelter.
21:22
[SPEAKER_02]: I stay informed in politics, but before and after work only so that I do not feel like a tiger's chasing me.
21:31
[SPEAKER_02]: Right, and I don't know.
21:32
[SPEAKER_02]: I hope that I think it's just really important to understand.
21:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Babe, I don't think you need more discipline.
21:38
[SPEAKER_02]: I think you need to be aware of when you're being disregulated and what's just regulating you.
21:43
[SPEAKER_02]: So that you can do the things you want to do.
21:47
[SPEAKER_02]: So, on our next episode, we are going to do some practical irregularization in some self-trust, you know, I always like to do information and then strategy.
21:56
[SPEAKER_02]: So, that's what I do.
21:57
[SPEAKER_02]: So, my love and tell Thursday, can you and me favor and just notice your states throughout the day?
22:03
[SPEAKER_02]: Notice when you feel it's so easy to tackle that inbox and when it feels so hard.
22:08
[SPEAKER_01]: Just notice, don't do anything about it.
22:10
[SPEAKER_01]: Just notice.
22:15
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, please give me a huge favor if our episodes are helping you in any way.
22:20
[SPEAKER_02]: Can you please share them with a friend who needs to hear it?
22:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Leave a review, tag me and sharing it so I can see what you loved about it.
22:29
[SPEAKER_02]: Whatever it is, it would really mean the world to me.
22:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And if you wanna support this podcast in any way aside from leaving a review or share it with a friend, you can be an OPC member.
22:39
[SPEAKER_02]: Yep, let's learn the best things you could do because at OPC we are a place where you could practice.
22:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Moving your body important to yourself and listening to it and understanding when you feel great and just getting to know yourself so much.
22:50
[SPEAKER_02]: Being curious, being a community, having some accountability, not more discipline, having fun, finishing this optional.
22:58
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23:04
[SPEAKER_02]: And if that doesn't work for you, then thanks for being here.
23:06
[SPEAKER_02]: Thanks for being here, thanks for being here.
23:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Thanks for downloading this episode.
23:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Thanks for listening all the way through.
23:10
[SPEAKER_02]: You're amazing.
23:11
[SPEAKER_02]: Until next time, be a TCA.
23:13
[SPEAKER_01]: That's all I got for this episode of the BItal you see at Podcasts.
23:17
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23:21
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23:25
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23:29
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23:31
[SPEAKER_01]: Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it.
23:34
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23:37
[SPEAKER_01]: Have an awesome day.
23:40
[SPEAKER_01]: Be it till you see it as a production of the blue pod cast network.
23:44
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23:55
[SPEAKER_00]: It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Leslie Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.
24:00
[SPEAKER_01]: It is transcribed, produced, and edited by the epicteam at Desenio.co.
24:05
[SPEAKER_00]: Our theme music is by Ellie at Apex production music, and our branding by designer and artist John Franco Chilfe.
24:12
[SPEAKER_01]: Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.
24:15
[SPEAKER_00]: Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website.
24:19
[SPEAKER_00]: And finally, the Meredith route for keeping us all on point and on time.