Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / What to do When Your Outcome Doesn't Match Your Expectations | a conversation about waiting with Barb Roose

Transcript

What to do When Your Outcome Doesn't Match Your Expectations | a conversation about waiting with Barb Roose · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

0:05
SPEAKER_00: My name is Amy Wicks and I love to talk about the gospel message your heart was created to hear.
0:11
SPEAKER_00: All things Enneagram and helping you be confident that you are the best mom for your kids.
0:18
SPEAKER_00: I'm a mountain mama who somehow ended up on a cul-de-sac in the Medwest.
0:22
SPEAKER_00: I was alone and without family or community.
0:25
SPEAKER_00: But the Lord, he didn't let me stay there.
0:28
SPEAKER_00: He helped me turn my broken-hearted moment into a whole-hearted decision to get intentional with my faith, my marriage, and my kids.
0:37
SPEAKER_00: I share broken-hearted perspective with story, but with wholehearted purpose and plans so you can live a life full of confidence and abundance.
0:46
SPEAKER_00: Think of this podcast as your on-the-go mom pal, mixed with a little bit of Enneagram coaching.
0:52
SPEAKER_00: So get to that pile of laundry or hit the treadmill or load up the kids in the car for that grocery run.
0:58
SPEAKER_00: And be ready to be encouraged and challenged while you listen.
1:02
SPEAKER_00: This is the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
1:10
SPEAKER_00: Hey friends, I'm so glad you're here today.
1:13
SPEAKER_00: This month we are focusing on how we make the most of our time and opportunities, or as I like to call it, wholehearted minutes.
1:21
SPEAKER_00: Today's guest is Barb Roos, speaker and author who's passionate about equipping women to win at life with Christ-empowered strength and dignity.
1:31
SPEAKER_00: She not only has the study that we will be talking about today, which is called I'm Waiting God, Finding Blessing in God's Delays, but she also has a new Bible study, surrendered available next month.
1:45
SPEAKER_00: Barb is a deep well of wisdom and resources.
1:49
SPEAKER_00: This conversation is rich with encouragement.
1:53
SPEAKER_00: We will talk about what it looks like to wait on God, what to do when the outcome doesn't match your expectations, and of course, we'll have some Enneagram conversation.
2:02
SPEAKER_00: A little disclaimer.
2:04
SPEAKER_00: We had this conversation a while back.
2:06
SPEAKER_00: So I've come to learn a few things about my true dominant type, which I have yet to share.
2:13
SPEAKER_00: But just so you know, I have learned that I don't lead as a type three after all.
2:18
SPEAKER_00: I'll keep sharing pieces of my journey in conversations to come.
2:22
SPEAKER_00: But until then, as you listen, you may discover there is more you would like to know about the Enneagram.
2:28
SPEAKER_00: The Enneagram can be overwhelming and it's sometimes hard to know where to begin.
2:33
SPEAKER_00: But I've created my Easy Enneagram resources to help you make your journey so much easier.
2:40
SPEAKER_00: If you haven't already, you can get your Easy Enneagram quick start, where I give you the next steps with easy to find links and resources.
2:48
SPEAKER_00: And then if you want to learn what the Enneagram is, what it can do for you, and what can be dangerous about the Enneagram, the next step is the Enneagram 101 video guide.
2:58
SPEAKER_00: Check out easyeneagram.com or the links available in the show notes with all the information.
3:04
SPEAKER_00: Now let's dive right into this conversation.
3:15
SPEAKER_00: Well, Barb, I am thrilled to meet you today.
3:19
SPEAKER_00: I am so excited to share with my friends your message and this conversation today.
3:25
SPEAKER_00: So I've given them a little, a little, you know, inside scoop ahead of time.
3:29
SPEAKER_00: This is Barb, this is my friend, this is who she is.
3:32
SPEAKER_00: But give us a little bit more.
3:34
SPEAKER_00: What inspired this message and study?
3:37
SPEAKER_00: I'm waiting on God.
3:38
SPEAKER_00: Because I think that we all, at least if we're not there, you know, as far as we're waiting on God right now, we have been there and we will be there again.
3:48
SPEAKER_01: So share your story.
3:51
SPEAKER_01: Right.
3:52
SPEAKER_01: Well, part of what inspired the message is just because I am human and I live on this earth, and there are times when I get annoyed when the person in line in front of me is taking too long.
4:04
SPEAKER_01: And there are times when I kind of me.
4:09
SPEAKER_01: No.
4:10
SPEAKER_01: Or when I was when I was teaching my children how to tie their tennis shoes and it took them forever.
4:17
SPEAKER_01: And I was going to hurry up.
4:19
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
4:20
SPEAKER_01: And so deep in my little heart, I've always wanted to let's go, let's go, let's go.
4:26
SPEAKER_01: Uh, but then also one of the spiritual reasons why I wrote this study was because in our family, uh, an issue came up that I couldn't fix, something that I prayed about, that God didn't instantly answer the prayer.
4:40
SPEAKER_01: And it took a decade.
4:42
SPEAKER_01: And it was a waiting room challenge where I had to learn how to sit and trust God in a space where I couldn't make something happen.
4:53
SPEAKER_01: And when we sit in the waiting room of life, uh sometimes we're able to read the magazines, we we get the cup of coffee, we look out the window, but we all know what it feels like to watch the doorway to see when something's gonna be over and hope that it all turns out okay.
5:11
SPEAKER_00: Right.
5:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I I know that feeling well, and I'm in the middle of it.
5:16
SPEAKER_00: I think that's the interesting thing about waiting on God is that we may have some something in our life that we finally have the answer or the fruition of, or, or you know, we we get to be on the other side of that outcome.
5:31
SPEAKER_00: But oftentimes there are one or two things going on in the moment that we're waiting on that answer, and we might have some things figured out.
5:39
SPEAKER_00: And the often though, I'm so guilty of forgetting those answers in that season of waiting on God and remembering that He came through before and it seemed like forever then, but it did happen, especially when I'm in the middle of another season of waiting.
5:56
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely, because our memories can get really short.
6:01
SPEAKER_01: I always think about my children.
6:03
SPEAKER_01: When my kids were little, my my girls are 27, 24, and 19 now.
6:08
SPEAKER_01: Uh, but I remember they used to come downstairs and ask for a cookie or ask for a snack.
6:13
SPEAKER_01: And if I was busy and didn't give it to them immediately, they would fall out on the floor and lose their little minds.
6:19
SPEAKER_01: I know, right?
6:20
SPEAKER_01: Right.
6:20
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
6:21
SPEAKER_01: And they had they had forgotten that I had fed them day after day after day.
6:28
SPEAKER_01: They had forgotten that I had met their needs.
6:30
SPEAKER_01: And I believe, in a spiritual sense, uh, for me, I've been that way with God.
6:34
SPEAKER_01: When I said, God, will you do this for me?
6:36
SPEAKER_01: And he doesn't immediately do it, and I fall out on the floor, and God's in heaven going, Did I not show up and take care of you every day?
6:45
SPEAKER_01: Have I not provided for you?
6:48
SPEAKER_01: So it's this thing inside of us that when we we feel like God isn't answering our prayers, that some of that frustration does come when we forget about his faithfulness.
7:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's so true.
7:02
SPEAKER_00: I that's usually what I'm guilty of.
7:04
SPEAKER_00: And I am guessing that some gratitude and worship is part of the journey, is it?
7:12
SPEAKER_01: Truly.
7:13
SPEAKER_01: Those are two of the most beautiful ways for us to put ourselves in a place where the waiting room stops feeling like a prison.
7:22
SPEAKER_01: I don't know who's listening today, but I imagine that some of your listeners have been praying for a baby.
7:29
SPEAKER_01: They've been month after month in fertility.
7:32
SPEAKER_01: Some are praying for Mr.
7:34
SPEAKER_01: Wright.
7:35
SPEAKER_01: Uh, some have been praying for a job that reduces financial stress.
7:40
SPEAKER_01: Some are praying for a prodigal child.
7:42
SPEAKER_01: Whatever it is, we're not talking about trying to catch a sale on some curtains at Target.
7:48
SPEAKER_01: Like this, this is real.
7:51
SPEAKER_01: This is this is, and that's why I wrote the Bible study because it is a real issue.
7:58
SPEAKER_01: And part of the pressure of waiting, the frustration is that as long as we're watching for what we're waiting for and it doesn't seem to move, that's when we start feeling discouraged.
8:09
SPEAKER_01: But on one hand, when we have gratitude, and gratitude is remembering what God has already done, and on the other hand, we have worship, and worship is the posture of God, I know you're gonna show up.
8:20
SPEAKER_01: When we can figure out how to live between those two spaces, live between those two ditches, then our waiting room journeys feel less desperate, and we then can see the blessing and and walk in the blessing of what God is doing for us every single day.
8:37
SPEAKER_01: That's so good.
8:39
SPEAKER_00: We talk a lot here about the fact that wholehearted decisions are actually birthed from brokenhearted moments, right?
8:46
SPEAKER_00: We kind of come to the end of ourselves.
8:49
SPEAKER_00: For I mean, that sort of sums it up.
8:51
SPEAKER_00: And we have that brokenhearted moment and we can do one of two things with it.
8:55
SPEAKER_00: We can spiral downward and out of control, or we can spiral upward and make that wholehearted decision that we will love the Lord with all of our heart, mind, soul, strength, and love others.
9:08
SPEAKER_00: As we're propelled that way, oftentimes it takes a little while, but we look back and we go, oh, that was the brokenhearted moment.
9:15
SPEAKER_00: That's what I learned from that.
9:16
SPEAKER_00: And that threw me into the arms of God.
9:18
SPEAKER_00: For you, what are some of those?
9:20
SPEAKER_00: Because I I bet there are many.
9:22
SPEAKER_00: What is one or some of those brokenhearted moments that led you to that whole-hearted decision that it was worth, worth it to wait on God?
9:30
SPEAKER_01: Part of the Bible study of that 10-year unanswered prayer, uh, it was an addiction issue that had moved into our family.
9:40
SPEAKER_01: And the brokenheartedness of it wasn't just that it was an addiction issue.
9:46
SPEAKER_01: The brokenheartedness of it was watching someone that we loved and cared about day after day be consumed by something that we could not control.
9:57
SPEAKER_01: And as the days stretched into months and the months stretched into years, um, the brokenhearted happened every day.
10:04
SPEAKER_01: And it wasn't just the sadness of watching, it was the impact on our family.
10:10
SPEAKER_01: And as I prayed, because sometimes I would pray and say, God, you could take care of this, you could fix it right now.
10:16
SPEAKER_01: Right.
10:17
SPEAKER_01: And yet God wasn't.
10:19
SPEAKER_01: And and I knew that God had the power too.
10:22
SPEAKER_01: And this journey in my heart of if God isn't doing this, then what is God doing?
10:29
SPEAKER_01: And it comes down to what you said.
10:31
SPEAKER_01: It's that the brokenheartedness leads us to a decision to pursue wholeheartedness in Christ.
10:37
SPEAKER_01: And so I prayed and I studied my Bible and I stopped looking and saying, I'm waiting on God to remove the addiction issue.
10:46
SPEAKER_01: The blessing and freedom came at the point when my posture switched from waiting to I'm worshiping God for who he is, what he's done, how he's taking care of us, how he's providing us, how he gives us strength and joy.
11:03
SPEAKER_01: So moving from I'm waiting, which is brokenhearted, to I'm worshiping, which is wholehearted, right?
11:11
SPEAKER_01: That is where I was able to experience God's best blessing for our lives.
11:16
SPEAKER_00: That's so good.
11:17
SPEAKER_00: Just this week I was sharing with a friend.
11:20
SPEAKER_00: I um I'm part of uh international, oh no, it's called Bible Study Fellowship.
11:26
SPEAKER_00: I think it's an international thing as well.
11:28
SPEAKER_00: But we're going through Acts and the Early Church.
11:31
SPEAKER_00: Fantastic, you know, shout out to them.
11:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm always a one to recommend that if you're looking for some place to gather with others or to study online.
11:39
SPEAKER_00: But we are reading through Hebrews and Hebrews 11, I think that's yep, 11, it kind of talks about the patriarchs of our faith, the great ones, the ones that, you know, are all throughout the Old Testament.
11:53
SPEAKER_00: And it lists them all.
11:55
SPEAKER_00: And as I was kind of dissecting that chapter, it was a big chapter.
11:59
SPEAKER_00: I'm going, you know, oh, you know, this is telling me about faith, and it this person shapes faith this way, or their action of faith looks this way.
12:07
SPEAKER_00: But as I came to the end of it, the biggest overarching theme that I got out of it for me was that they did see a part of the promise fulfilled in their lifetime, but they didn't see the ultimate, right?
12:24
SPEAKER_00: And I I saw in that here they were testified to be great, and here they were acknowledged for their faith, but it wasn't faith because of the outcome, because they received the outcome, it was faith because they they hung on to the truth through the process.
12:40
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, oh, dang it.
12:44
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
12:45
SPEAKER_01: Well, I love that end of Hebrews chapter 11.
12:49
SPEAKER_01: I was actually just teaching on that recently.
12:52
SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's awesome.
12:52
SPEAKER_01: Especially because the verses at the end, as it talks about the great faithful and their names, Moses and Rahab and all of them, but those the people in the end, the verses like 36, 39, uh, these are individuals who, as it says they hadn't received the promise, but they live by faith.
13:11
SPEAKER_01: Right.
13:11
SPEAKER_01: I love the encouragement in that because they just trusted God.
13:17
SPEAKER_01: They didn't know that Jesus was coming, when he was coming.
13:21
SPEAKER_01: They did not have the experience of the Holy Spirit living within them.
13:24
SPEAKER_01: And how much of an encouragement that is to me, how it encourages all of us, because now we do have Jesus.
13:31
SPEAKER_01: We saw that he came, he lived, he predicted his own death, burial, resurrection, and he pulled it off.
13:39
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
13:39
SPEAKER_01: And we have the spirit living within us.
13:42
SPEAKER_01: And so all of that is such a beautiful testimony to us today, uh, to just keep walking by faith.
13:50
SPEAKER_01: But I also love that section at the end of Hebrews 11 because those individuals, not all of them had happy endings to their story of walking with God.
14:02
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
14:03
SPEAKER_01: Right.
14:03
SPEAKER_01: And it talks about how some were sought in half and tortured.
14:07
SPEAKER_01: And and it it it really provides a much needed reality check for us, especially as American Christians, because we think if we pray long enough, hard enough, that God will give us what we want.
14:20
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
14:20
SPEAKER_01: And um and for me, the greatest spiritual lesson of my life has been will I live for God's glory no matter the outcome of my story.
14:32
SPEAKER_01: Because my story didn't have a happy ending.
14:35
SPEAKER_01: And yet I can stand in joy and confidence and say, To God be the glory, great things He has done.
14:44
SPEAKER_00: That is powerful, sister.
14:46
SPEAKER_00: That is so good.
14:48
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
14:48
SPEAKER_00: That'll preach.
14:50
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I I think it puts everything into perspective.
14:54
SPEAKER_00: And your waiting will probably look different than my waiting.
14:57
SPEAKER_00: And waiting is really hard.
14:59
SPEAKER_00: But when we look at it in the light of the word and what you know the saints before us went through, I go, all right, if they can do it, I can do it.
15:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm hanging around.
15:12
SPEAKER_01: That's a beautiful, I love that, and that's such a beautiful way to capture it that if they can do it, that we can.
15:19
SPEAKER_01: Because the scriptures tell us there's this great crowd of witnesses who are cheering us on.
15:24
SPEAKER_01: And I remind myself of that, that I know that God is with me and for me, and I know that the spirit is empowering me.
15:32
SPEAKER_01: But I also love, especially when we feel like uh everything is against us, right?
15:37
SPEAKER_01: I love that there is a cheering section in heaven that's saying you can do this.
15:43
SPEAKER_00: That's all right.
15:44
SPEAKER_00: You go, girl, keep on going.
15:47
SPEAKER_01: Is that what you is your cheering section of the same?
15:50
SPEAKER_01: You go, girl.
15:50
SPEAKER_01: That's right.
15:52
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
15:53
SPEAKER_01: There's a cheering section in heaven telling us all you go, girl.
15:56
SPEAKER_00: That's right.
15:56
SPEAKER_00: That's right.
15:57
SPEAKER_00: They are.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: I love it.
16:00
SPEAKER_00: Oh man.
16:00
SPEAKER_00: Well, okay, so the other thing we really like to talk around here about around here is the Enneagram.
16:07
SPEAKER_00: And I believe I have it correct that you and I are fellow Enneagram threes.
16:11
SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah.
16:13
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
16:14
SPEAKER_01: Now, mine has always been a little disputed because I'm a three that looks a lot like an eight.
16:19
SPEAKER_00: So uh you and me both.
16:21
SPEAKER_00: Who knows, right?
16:24
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
16:24
SPEAKER_01: Now, are you a three-two or a three-four?
16:27
SPEAKER_00: You know, I've gone back and forth on that one.
16:29
SPEAKER_00: I've I think my home environment, I grew up in a pastor's home, really fostered that two wing.
16:36
SPEAKER_00: But maybe I'd be more naturally a four.
16:38
SPEAKER_00: I've because you know, we we gotta flap that wing when we're writing and when we're doing all this content creation.
16:45
SPEAKER_00: You probably are familiar with that.
16:46
SPEAKER_00: How about you?
16:47
SPEAKER_00: What do you identify with closest?
16:49
SPEAKER_01: Um, the two is still tricky for me, but I really I'm I'm I really am a two.
16:54
SPEAKER_01: I'm not so much a four.
16:56
SPEAKER_01: Gotcha.
16:57
SPEAKER_01: Gotcha.
16:57
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, not so much.
17:00
unknown: Yeah.
17:00
SPEAKER_01: I mean, and I love the part, the creative part and things like that.
17:04
SPEAKER_01: Um, but no, I'm a pretty three-two, pretty strong three-two.
17:07
SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
17:07
SPEAKER_00: So you you're able to stay up on that positive side really well.
17:11
SPEAKER_00: You don't go down into the melancholy.
17:13
SPEAKER_00: And you're the you're the best kind of friend when we need a little bit like, all right, girl, brush yourself off, get going.
17:22
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely, which is why I felt a little more like an eight, because I was more like, get up, get going, let's roll.
17:29
SPEAKER_00: No moping around here.
17:31
SPEAKER_01: Right.
17:31
SPEAKER_01: Well, but actually, in part of my waiting room journey over the years, uh, God used that to really show me what compassion looks like.
17:40
SPEAKER_01: Oh, wow.
17:41
SPEAKER_01: And to show what encouragement looks like.
17:44
SPEAKER_01: And to be able to speak some words into myself over the years of great compassion.
17:49
SPEAKER_01: Things like, Barb, today you're doing the best that you can.
17:53
SPEAKER_01: Uh, Barb, today, it's okay for you not to be okay.
17:57
SPEAKER_01: Uh Barb, go ahead and sit down.
18:01
SPEAKER_01: You don't have to take care of this right now.
18:03
SPEAKER_01: Or uh you don't have to figure the answers out today, Barb.
18:07
SPEAKER_01: The answers will come.
18:08
SPEAKER_01: Uh, during that long waiting room journey, those are phrases that became a part of the language that I spoke to myself, which I really feel strongly about.
18:19
SPEAKER_01: No matter what our personality type is, that we learn to speak to ourselves, especially as women, yeah.
18:25
SPEAKER_01: Great compassion and love.
18:27
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
18:28
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's fantastic.
18:30
SPEAKER_00: I think also as a type three, we're we tend to be the go-getters.
18:34
SPEAKER_00: And whether you lead as a three, seven, or eight, and I I always say I'd prefer to be a seven personally.
18:40
SPEAKER_00: I I kind of like that.
18:41
SPEAKER_00: But uh we we tend to be the assertive types.
18:44
SPEAKER_00: And in that assertive stance, that usually means we're the type of people who aren't going to wait for resolution, we're gonna go out and figure it out or find it some way or another.
18:56
SPEAKER_00: So, how how did you learn to wrestle that, or what did it look like to wrestle that when you were in the waiting room?
19:05
SPEAKER_01: I love that you asked this question because um, so my I'm waiting God Bible study, it released in September 2019, so just not that long ago.
19:16
SPEAKER_01: So, my new Bible study is titled Surrendered, Letting Go and Living Like Jesus.
19:21
SPEAKER_01: It comes out in April 2020.
19:24
SPEAKER_00: Oh man.
19:24
SPEAKER_01: So that gotcha that captures that part of my journey.
19:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
19:30
SPEAKER_01: Because while I was in the waiting room, I had to understand the power of surrender, that that letting go, that surrendering wasn't an act of weakness, but rather it was an act of self-control, discipline, and faith.
19:46
SPEAKER_01: And how I had to to stand in the posture of going, do I trust what God is doing in my life?
19:55
SPEAKER_01: So, in that Bible study, there are six surrender principles, like I'm not in control of others or outcomes.
20:01
SPEAKER_01: I would have to whisper that to myself.
20:04
SPEAKER_01: I have to, I have to learn how to walk by faith, not rush to follow my feelings.
20:10
SPEAKER_01: Um another one was uh pushing my plans will stress me, but following God's timing will bless me.
20:18
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's write that down, people.
20:21
SPEAKER_01: Yes, that it's it's in the surrendered study, but there were there were six principles that I had to kind of develop for myself.
20:29
SPEAKER_01: And some of it came from I was involved in and I'm still involved in a recovery 12-step program for loved ones of someone with addiction, uh, because it ultimately ended up um killing my marriage, my 26-year marriage.
20:46
SPEAKER_01: Um my spouse walked away, and it was it was it was excruciatingly painful.
20:53
SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
20:53
SPEAKER_01: But yet in that God showed up and in that he he was able to bring blessings out of a broken place.
21:04
SPEAKER_01: But I had to do my part, and my part was learning how to trust God with what he was doing with my life.
21:11
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, man, and the surrender piece, it isn't easy.
21:15
SPEAKER_00: In fact, my sister tattooed it on her foot because she realizes she needs to be reminded of it every day.
21:22
SPEAKER_00: So that's a good word, right?
21:24
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
21:26
SPEAKER_01: So she actually tattooed surrender on her foot.
21:29
SPEAKER_00: That's I know, right?
21:31
SPEAKER_00: It is powerful.
21:32
SPEAKER_00: I love it, and she walks it out, and that was part of it, putting it on her foot and walking out surrender every day.
21:38
SPEAKER_00: And yeah, so I well, this is awesome.
21:41
SPEAKER_00: I'm so glad because I'm glad not only to share that I'm waiting on God, but my friends, depending on where they at are where they are at in their seasons of life, they could pick up surrender, and that might be the word that they need right now, too.
21:54
SPEAKER_00: That's so good.
21:55
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
21:56
SPEAKER_00: All right, so this year I am on a mission to have more fun.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: Because I turned 40 last year.
22:03
SPEAKER_00: And the year before that, my sister challenged me.
22:06
SPEAKER_00: Hey, and this is the same sister.
22:08
SPEAKER_00: I have two of them.
22:09
SPEAKER_00: One of them, this is the same one with the tattoo.
22:11
SPEAKER_00: But she was like, I think you need to plan 40 days of fun.
22:15
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, what?
22:17
SPEAKER_00: I can't do that.
22:18
SPEAKER_00: That's a good plan.
22:20
SPEAKER_00: How do I have 40 days of the five of the five of the five?
22:21
SPEAKER_00: That is a broom.
22:22
SPEAKER_00: That's a broom.
22:23
SPEAKER_01: You need to hold on to that sister.
22:26
SPEAKER_01: She is brilliant.
22:26
SPEAKER_00: She is brilliant.
22:27
SPEAKER_00: She's she's eight years my younger and so much wiser most of the time.
22:32
SPEAKER_00: But I I really took that.
22:34
SPEAKER_00: And so for about 18 months, I've been letting that you know I let that sit in my heart.
22:39
SPEAKER_00: And I really went to the word of God, even going, what does fun look like?
22:44
SPEAKER_00: What is celebration?
22:45
SPEAKER_00: What does God say about it?
22:46
SPEAKER_00: And so I he and I have had a ton of fun talking and I've had a ton of fun writing it down.
22:52
SPEAKER_00: And so I'm always going, okay, so every day can't be a day at Disneyland.
22:58
SPEAKER_00: That's not the kind of fun that we're talking about, but we are looking for the wholehearted celebration piece.
23:04
SPEAKER_00: So when we want to make a decision, I think if we make it fun or we see what negative things it might replace, um, it might stick, right?
23:13
SPEAKER_00: We might actually do it again.
23:14
SPEAKER_00: So what did you learn in the process of waiting?
23:17
SPEAKER_00: How did you learn how to celebrate?
23:19
SPEAKER_00: How did you, how did you find, how did you enter into those wholehearted moments of celebration, even when it was really in a tough season?
23:27
SPEAKER_01: So I love that you asked that question.
23:31
SPEAKER_01: Uh, there was a season of time during the most intense parts where um I still had two daughters living at home, and I began what I would I began what we called fun Saturdays.
23:43
SPEAKER_01: Nice.
23:44
SPEAKER_01: That's awesome.
23:45
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
23:46
SPEAKER_01: And um, and it was an intentional decision.
23:52
SPEAKER_01: We couldn't change our situation, we couldn't change at the time our circumstances.
23:57
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
23:58
SPEAKER_01: And yet I just had to say, what is gonna be life-giving?
24:03
SPEAKER_01: And what was life-giving was us spending time together and having experiences with each other.
24:09
SPEAKER_01: It wasn't going to buy stuff, but it was what helps us connect most.
24:14
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
24:15
SPEAKER_01: So sometimes we would go to the mall and we would walk around and we would talk.
24:19
SPEAKER_01: Sometimes we would go to the movies, sometimes we would do spa days with each other.
24:23
SPEAKER_01: And and it wasn't the activity that we did, but it was the decision to intentionally find what was life-giving.
24:32
SPEAKER_01: Uh, sometimes it was sitting with a Netflix and watching a favorite TV show together that made us all laugh.
24:38
SPEAKER_01: For me, it was taking long walks around my neighborhood and listening to podcasts.
24:44
SPEAKER_01: But fun Saturday, it just was this is our way of being intentional about putting a smile on our face and joy into our heart.
24:52
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, that's so good.
24:54
SPEAKER_00: And I I really think that is the secret, is that it's kind of a fancy soul care thing.
24:59
SPEAKER_00: Instead of labeling it soul care, this is like, okay, what actually feeds you and what sounds fun.
25:07
SPEAKER_01: Very, very much so.
25:09
SPEAKER_01: And it and it isn't about the cost, uh, it's about creating the experience.
25:14
SPEAKER_01: Right.
25:15
SPEAKER_01: And for and again for me, some of the the fun was me just taking a walk around my neighborhood.
25:22
SPEAKER_01: And I live in a beautiful historic neighborhood, and I still do.
25:25
SPEAKER_01: And it was being able to look at the flowers and the houses, and maybe I would run into someone or stopping and and often my daily fun is my beautiful cup of chai tea.
25:37
SPEAKER_01: I have mugs that I love, I that I love and adore.
25:41
SPEAKER_01: And every day I make myself a cup of tea because that brings joy to my heart.
25:46
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
25:46
SPEAKER_01: Uh as much as I can, pretty much every day that I'm home.
25:50
SPEAKER_01: I love to take showers by candlelight.
25:53
SPEAKER_01: I know it sounds crazy.
25:55
SPEAKER_01: No, people do it with baths.
25:56
SPEAKER_00: Why not shower?
25:58
SPEAKER_01: I think it's because I'm not, I'm not gonna sit in the bathtub.
26:02
SPEAKER_01: I got stuff I gotta do.
26:03
SPEAKER_01: That's right, girl.
26:05
SPEAKER_01: I I do love lighting a candle and having the bathroom smell beautiful, and it's an interior room, so there aren't any windows, but um, I just love so those are things that make me smile.
26:16
SPEAKER_01: Those are things that are fun for me.
26:18
SPEAKER_01: So it doesn't have to be really sophisticated.
26:20
SPEAKER_01: That's right.
26:21
SPEAKER_01: It just has to be something that is life-giving and and creates joy.
26:25
SPEAKER_00: Uh, that's so good.
26:27
SPEAKER_00: Barb, I've really loved this conversation and I know this is going to bless my friends and encourage them, whether they're in a waiting season or they've been through one or they're about to enter another.
26:37
SPEAKER_00: And maybe in a surrender season too.
26:40
SPEAKER_00: So I I just love in your obedience and your faithfulness to not only walk it out, but then share it with others.
26:46
SPEAKER_00: I think that is always a really beautiful thing.
26:48
SPEAKER_00: So thank you.
26:49
SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you for letting me hang out with you and your friends today.
26:53
SPEAKER_01: It is just a joy uh to talk about God's goodness, his faithfulness, and how he blesses us, even in those tough waiting room spaces.
27:02
SPEAKER_01: Amen.
27:11
SPEAKER_00: Isn't Barb fabulous?
27:14
SPEAKER_00: I know you'll want to head on over to her website to get the I'm Waiting God study and maybe even the new Surrendered Study.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: She has so many resources.
27:22
SPEAKER_00: Be sure and check it out.
27:23
SPEAKER_00: It's Barbroos.com or click the link in the show notes.
27:29
SPEAKER_00: I hope you've enjoyed this episode.
27:30
SPEAKER_00: And if someone you know is in a season of waiting, I imagine they would so appreciate hearing this conversation.
27:37
SPEAKER_00: If you look at your podcast app in the upper right hand corner, just hit that share button to text or post this episode for someone who needs to hear it.
27:47
SPEAKER_00: So until next time, let's invite others to join us to pursue perspective, purpose, and plans for a simply a wholehearted life.