Latest / The Everyday Awesome Project / 134: Seat of the Soul: Stop Letting Fear Run Your Life

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134: Seat of the Soul: Stop Letting Fear Run Your Life · The Everyday Awesome Project

• 0:27
  Polly Mertens: Hey superstars, welcome back.
• 0:29
  Polly Mertens: Paula here.
• 0:30
  Polly Mertens: I know Sam Pruitt.
• 0:31
  Polly Mertens: It is a solo episode.
• 0:33
  Polly Mertens: You get all of me today and wishing Sam well.
• 0:36
  Polly Mertens: She's having some test run today.
• 0:38
  Polly Mertens: That girl is going on her John Muir trail shortly, just a couple weeks away.
• 0:42
  Polly Mertens: Can't wait to share more about that trip upcoming.
• 0:45
  Polly Mertens: But in today's fine episode, you know, Sam and I are often doing episodes that are like things that are showing up in our coaching or what we're working on or whatnot.
• 0:54
  Polly Mertens: And, you know, as we were going to do an episode today and she had to reschedule, I was like, well, what am I working on?
• 1:00
  Polly Mertens: So always doing experiments.
• 1:02
  Polly Mertens: And so this one is just wanted to share with you, I can't even remember exactly how long I've been doing this, but I'll call it the Seed of the Soul practice.
• 1:11
  Polly Mertens: That's what I'm talking about today.
• 1:13
  Polly Mertens: Is, you know, I'm doing challenges, learning things.
• 1:16
  Polly Mertens: You know, I'm just a student and a guinea pig of personal transformation, I would say.
• 1:21
  Polly Mertens: And so in this episode, I want to share with you what, you know, if you've never heard of Seed of the Soul or if you've never booked, I'll go into that and what my experiment is looking like so far, and why am I doing this and how long am I doing this?
• 1:35
  Polly Mertens: And just some, you know, cool background on, you know, one of the things I find is people reach out to me after our episodes and are like, well, tell me more about that.
• 1:42
  Polly Mertens: And where did you hear about that?
• 1:43
  Polly Mertens: And what are you doing?
• 1:44
  Polly Mertens: You know, and stuff.
• 1:45
  Polly Mertens: And so I was like, I should share more about the things that I'm compiling into my practice, Seat of the Soul.
• 1:54
  Polly Mertens: So just be clear.
• 1:55
  Polly Mertens: I bought the Seat of the Soul book maybe, gosh, I think it's like 10 years ago, and I tried to read it and I couldn't get into it.
• 2:01
  Polly Mertens: I saw, so that's what we're gonna talk about today.
• 2:05
  Polly Mertens: So let me just, you know, tell you like, why am I doing this episode now?
• 2:08
  Polly Mertens: Is like it's timely for me.
• 2:10
  Polly Mertens: I'm not finished.
• 2:11
  Polly Mertens: This isn't like, oh, I practiced it for 90 days.
• 2:14
  Polly Mertens: Here's all the things I learned, or I've been meditating for, you know, 10 years.
• 2:18
  Polly Mertens: Here's no, this is just like I'm starting this practice living from the seat of my soul.
• 2:24
  Polly Mertens: As I've been, you know, like you hear something three times and you're like, oh shoot, I need to look at that, or like things coalesce.
• 2:31
  Polly Mertens: You hear something a third time, you're like, all right, I gotta check into that.
• 2:33
  Polly Mertens: Well, seat of the soul was one of those things recently.
• 2:36
  Polly Mertens: So I was like, hmm.
• 2:37
  Polly Mertens: So I saw Gary Zukov.
• 2:39
  Polly Mertens: I think he was on the Know Thyself podcast, which I respect both those people.
• 2:43
  Polly Mertens: And but I when I had bought his book, like I said, I just couldn't get into it.
• 2:46
  Polly Mertens: So circle 10 years later, I was listening to something he was on and just was hearing it newly.
• 2:53
  Polly Mertens: And it reminds me when I started reading his book, it was at the time about when I read The Untethered Soul.
• 2:59
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, oh, they're kind of the same.
• 3:01
  Polly Mertens: They're different.
• 3:01
  Polly Mertens: I don't know all the differences and sameness of them.
• 3:04
  Polly Mertens: I love The Untethered Soul.
• 3:06
  Polly Mertens: I freaking, that's one of my top three books of all time.
• 3:09
  Polly Mertens: So The Untethered Soul, Michael Singer.
• 3:11
  Polly Mertens: Love it.
• 3:11
  Polly Mertens: Seed of the Soul is Oprah's, one of her probably favorite books of all time.
• 3:16
  Polly Mertens: She had Gary Zukov, who's the author of the Seed of the Soul book, on, I think there's recorded like 30 episodes or something like that over the 90s and 2000s.
• 3:24
  Polly Mertens: Gary's still alive doing podcasts.
• 3:26
  Polly Mertens: He's just as awesome as ever.
• 3:28
  Polly Mertens: If you listen to the man, clearly coming from a different part of the universe than most people are coming from.
• 3:33
  Polly Mertens: And he talks about why.
• 3:34
  Polly Mertens: That's part of what was curious for me is I think in that Know Thyself podcast, he opened up more than I was getting from his books, or I would say he was saying on Main Street, mainstream podcast, or back then like Oprah's couch, you might say.
• 3:49
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, I get so he's talking about like he was he had a girlfriend who was a channeler and channeling, I forget who it was, the name of the entity or whatever, and he got to spend time with that entity and ask it all these questions, and he got some download, just all this stuff.
• 4:02
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, oh my God, Gary's like way interesting, right?
• 4:06
  Polly Mertens: So that sent me off on a little binge to learn about him and things about that.
• 4:10
  Polly Mertens: And then I was like, Cedar the soul.
• 4:12
  Polly Mertens: And one of the things that was like my favorite in that is he talked about, oh, what is it called?
• 4:17
  Polly Mertens: He calls it personal.
• 4:18
  Polly Mertens: Oh, I'll have to go back into it.
• 4:21
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, I'll share a little bit more about each one of them.
• 4:23
  Polly Mertens: But what I'm gonna do today is like weave in.
• 4:26
  Polly Mertens: Remember, I said like you hear it in threes and then you start to take action.
• 4:30
  Polly Mertens: So it was like, oh, this kind of coalesced with that.
• 4:32
  Polly Mertens: And so there's another teacher that I'm hearing about lately, and I'll share about him, Joe Hudson and the art of accomplishment.
• 4:38
  Polly Mertens: And that coalesces with something that I was picking up in the last 30 days, which is the five hindrances, which ties to my Gene Keys work, which is Richard Rudd and the study of my what are called shadows.
• 4:50
  Polly Mertens: So I'm gonna go through like this I was this is gonna be like inside of Polly's mind and how, not even my mind, but soul and like how I do these experiments or how I study and understand and discover and learn about this beautiful soul slash personality slash ego that I am, and how it it's making sense for me and what I would love to share about it with you and see if there's anything that inside of this you might get like, oh, like this may send you on like a little mini tangent, like, oh, go get that book, or go look at that, or check out the gene keys.
• 5:24
  Polly Mertens: Like I had somebody contact me last time I did an episode on self-hypnosis and the silva method, and they're like, tell me about that, you know.
• 5:30
  Polly Mertens: So I'm hoping some of these things that I'm sharing will get you sparked.
• 5:34
  Polly Mertens: And, you know, it's your truth.
• 5:36
  Polly Mertens: This isn't like the formula.
• 5:37
  Polly Mertens: Polly doesn't have your formula, nobody has your formula but you, but you may pick up on some things that are like, ooh, resonates.
• 5:44
  Polly Mertens: Okay.
• 5:44
  Polly Mertens: Like that's how it was for me when I heard Gary Zuckoff.
• 5:47
  Polly Mertens: And like there were some things that resonated, and I was like marching off to read a little bit more or learn a bit a little bit more about that.
• 5:52
  Polly Mertens: So that's what my intention is, is to get you aware of some things that may help you reach back into your soul, like I'm doing, and see what there is and discover.
• 6:04
  Polly Mertens: So let's see, let me, I've got a little outline here that I just want to make sure I've like so many yummy little things.
• 6:10
  Polly Mertens: I was like working with Claude to help me put this outline together.
• 6:13
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, oh, we gotta throw that in.
• 6:14
  Polly Mertens: Oh, we gotta throw that in.
• 6:15
  Polly Mertens: And then I was like, okay, this like 15-minute episode is gonna like suddenly we'll see how long this grows to, but it's gonna be fun.
• 6:22
  Polly Mertens: So I do want to say this is a living experiment.
• 6:25
  Polly Mertens: I'm maybe 10 days in from when I first heard Gary's podcast on Know Thyself.
• 6:30
  Polly Mertens: I hit that Know Thyself podcast, the interview they did.
• 6:33
  Polly Mertens: And so it's fresh, it's a start.
• 6:37
  Polly Mertens: It's not six months in or six years in.
• 6:40
  Polly Mertens: So you're gonna get me in this already, like bouncing around, experimenting, trying some things, learning, haven't learned everything, which is cool, you know, like just more self-awareness, I would say.
• 6:51
  Polly Mertens: So let me start to share with you.
• 6:54
  Polly Mertens: I've talked about or I dropped the names of a lot of things.
• 6:57
  Polly Mertens: So let me let me go into each one of those.
• 6:58
  Polly Mertens: So I've got a little I want to share about with so Gary Zukoff, Z-U-K-A-V, Seat of the Soul, published in 1989.
• 7:05
  Polly Mertens: You know, some people say it was one of the most important, conscious books ever written.
• 7:08
  Polly Mertens: Oprah fricking raves, has him, you know, Gary's at Oprah's house and they do all these series of things.
• 7:15
  Polly Mertens: I don't even know all the things, but they went on to teach classes from what I understand.
• 7:19
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, so he was very influential in Oprah's wool, but I find her to be a very amazing human.
• 7:24
  Polly Mertens: So that tells me a lot, right?
• 7:26
  Polly Mertens: So I share that with you to see how, you know, this might influence you or have something for you.
• 7:32
  Polly Mertens: So Gary definitely does a good job of distinguishing your personality and your ego and how it sits separate from your soul, right?
• 7:42
  Polly Mertens: And so in the untethered soul, Michael Singer calls it the seat of the soul.
• 7:46
  Polly Mertens: That's where I was like, well, these books are the same.
• 7:48
  Polly Mertens: They're not, but whatever.
• 7:50
  Polly Mertens: But they both talk about the seat of your soul, like your awareness behind that egoic person that you think you are, that identity that you've created from ways of being and childhood and survival and behaviors and personality and all that stuff, right?
• 8:08
  Polly Mertens: So there's a distinction of your personality, and largely it's operating, Gary would say, from fear.
• 8:15
  Polly Mertens: And some of the things that it seeks are external power, control, validation, manipulation, status.
• 8:23
  Polly Mertens: He says that the soul operates from love and seeks authentic power, which is harmony, cooperation, and I love this one, reverence for life.
• 8:35
  Polly Mertens: Anytime I've hear that, like reverence for life, I'm like, oh, that's true.
• 8:41
  Polly Mertens: So I'm like, yes, speak it.
• 8:44
  Polly Mertens: So this is that word I couldn't, or that term I couldn't find earlier, but it's authentic power.
• 8:49
  Polly Mertens: I don't know if he was the original one who kind of put those two together, but we'll give him credit.
• 8:54
  Polly Mertens: So authentic power is the personality coming into service of the soul.
• 9:00
  Polly Mertens: Just like sit with that for a minute.
• 9:01
  Polly Mertens: And Oprah was like, I've seen her on the couch, like when he says it, and she's like ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, you know, like something clicked for Oprah.
• 9:09
  Polly Mertens: And she talks about how that was a pivotal moment where prior to reading his book and getting that, she had been doing so much external like status and success and all this stuff, and then shifted for her when she read this into like, oh, my personality is like a servant of a vessel for, like, use it in service of what your soul is up to.
• 9:31
  Polly Mertens: So the again, authentic power, maybe not the specific exam definition, but from Gary's book is the personality coming into service of the soul.
• 9:40
  Polly Mertens: That is your authentic power.
• 9:42
  Polly Mertens: It's like when those two line up and they're working, working, they're aligning together.
• 9:47
  Polly Mertens: They're not at odds.
• 9:49
  Polly Mertens: One isn't, you know, you're not just operating from ego, fear-driven, whatever.
• 9:53
  Polly Mertens: And I'm gonna go into how I have been and I'm gonna just like be flat out, like there's a lot of transparency that's gonna come through on this, or the authenticness.
• 10:01
  Polly Mertens: So it's not the soul replacing the personality, it's not replacing your traits, your humor, your voice.
• 10:07
  Polly Mertens: That all stays, right?
• 10:09
  Polly Mertens: They just become instruments of the soul rather than fear.
• 10:13
  Polly Mertens: I was like, and I'm still like in the inquiry, like, how does that look?
• 10:18
  Polly Mertens: What does that exactly mean?
• 10:20
  Polly Mertens: So I don't have it all figured out, but I was just like, I'm signing up for that.
• 10:23
  Polly Mertens: I'm signing up for studying that, I'm signing up for practicing that, I'm signing up for being in the question of how does this personality, this polyperson that I've created, this ways of being, these, you know, things that I do or things that I am, how does that serve my soul?
• 10:42
  Polly Mertens: Like letting my soul be the captain, if you will.
• 10:45
  Polly Mertens: So that's authentic power.
• 10:47
  Polly Mertens: More from Gary's book, The Evolutionary Shift, he named, and this is like a little of the big, big picture woo-woo consciousness that Gary is.
• 10:54
  Polly Mertens: Fuck, it's amazing.
• 10:56
  Polly Mertens: He talks about five sensory humans, which is what we have been for so, so long.
• 11:00
  Polly Mertens: And then consciousness has been more and more emerging in our culture, right?
• 11:06
  Polly Mertens: And we have multi-sensory humans.
• 11:08
  Polly Mertens: That's those of us that are channeling, that are, you know, having more intuitive.
• 11:12
  Polly Mertens: I mean, I think intuition's been around a long time, but we're like really getting it now.
• 11:16
  Polly Mertens: And I heard this interesting thing in a Ram Das talk, which was from the 80s or 90s, but he actually said it and I was like, wow, that like really talks about what I was going to talk about today.
• 11:25
  Polly Mertens: And he's like, when he used to speak in rooms in the 60s, really the only people that were conscious or aware or were just sort of outside of just like, you know, the five senses, this is all that's going on, awareness.
• 11:40
  Polly Mertens: He's like, those were people who had done acid, smoked grass, you know, had some spiritual awakening and lightning moments or something, right?
• 11:47
  Polly Mertens: Like something triggered a shift for them.
• 11:49
  Polly Mertens: And he said, and he was talking about in present tense, this was a thing in the late 80s or 90s, this talk he was giving.
• 11:55
  Polly Mertens: He's like, now, those of you in this room, a lot of you haven't done acid or done drugs or whatever, but you're still awakening to that consciousness.
• 12:04
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, yeah, and it's still happening, you know, 30-something years later.
• 12:08
  Polly Mertens: So I'm all aboard on that.
• 12:09
  Polly Mertens: But anyway, if you want to go learn more, Gary's book talks a lot about that.
• 12:12
  Polly Mertens: And that's just that outer world, like the plane that he's on of seeing and like understanding more than five senses for sure.
• 12:20
  Polly Mertens: He's very much tapped into that.
• 12:22
  Polly Mertens: So let's see what else he says, the intention as the fundamental creative act.
• 12:26
  Polly Mertens: Okay, Oprah's hot on this.
• 12:28
  Polly Mertens: She talked about after hearing his book, she's he says she said that every producer that worked on her show, when they came to her with a show idea, she said, tell me what's your intention for that show?
• 12:39
  Polly Mertens: Like, what is that, what do you want from that?
• 12:42
  Polly Mertens: And I'm starting to incorporate that into our episodes, right?
• 12:45
  Polly Mertens: Which is like, what's the intention of that episode?
• 12:47
  Polly Mertens: Like, what are we, what are we here to serve and support in why would we do this?
• 12:52
  Polly Mertens: Like, why should somebody pay attention to this?
• 12:54
  Polly Mertens: Why does it matter to us and why should it matter to somebody else?
• 12:56
  Polly Mertens: So having intention behind the creative acts that you're doing, or acts of service, or just acts in the world, right?
• 13:03
  Polly Mertens: Your business, your, your causes, your nonprofits, the relationships that you have, right?
• 13:08
  Polly Mertens: The things that are important to you, like finding the fundamental intention and and understanding it and aligning it with your soul.
• 13:14
  Polly Mertens: Uh, he talked about the frightened parts, and we'll go into a little bit, I'll kind of synthesize some of these different teachers, bodies of work.
• 13:22
  Polly Mertens: I don't know what you want to call it, but so he calls it your frightened parts and parts.
• 13:26
  Polly Mertens: There's parts theory, you can go study that, and it talks about integrating your multiple parts, like your little mini personalities or your parts of you.
• 13:33
  Polly Mertens: He calls them the frightened parts, which are the anger, the jealousy, resentment, impatience, and doubt.
• 13:39
  Polly Mertens: And he says they're not flaws to fix, but they're parts of your personality not yet directed toward your soul.
• 13:46
  Polly Mertens: I would say living from your soul.
• 13:48
  Polly Mertens: So they're the fear-based personality ways of being, right?
• 13:52
  Polly Mertens: These sort of like lower energy states.
• 13:55
  Polly Mertens: And he said the root underneath every frightened part is the feeling of being intrinsically defective and fundamentally alone.
• 14:04
  Polly Mertens: In Tony Robbins' world, we would say, Tony Robbins would say the two fundamental fears every human being walking on the planet has is I'm not enough and I won't be loved.
• 14:12
  Polly Mertens: That translates, like all this stuff, you guys, all this stuff just like bing, bing, bing, bing, it just bounces off each other.
• 14:19
  Polly Mertens: So Tony Robbins' world, the two fundamental fears that every human being has is I'm not enough and I won't be loved.
• 14:24
  Polly Mertens: Gary Zukov's words are the root underneath every frightened part of you is the feeling of being intrinsically defective, i.e., I'm not enough.
• 14:33
  Polly Mertens: And I'm not enough has a little flavors like I'm not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, tall enough, rich enough, whatever.
• 14:39
  Polly Mertens: I'm not enough.
• 14:41
  Polly Mertens: And I'm fundamentally alone.
• 14:42
  Polly Mertens: Like ostragize, you know, that mammalian brain, I'll be ostra-ostracized from the tribe kind of feeling.
• 14:48
  Polly Mertens: In his book, he talks about six practices.
• 14:52
  Polly Mertens: So turning inward when the and we'll go into this a little bit later when I start talking about Joe Hudson.
• 14:57
  Polly Mertens: And I'm loving his work right now in The Art of Accomplishment.
• 15:00
  Polly Mertens: So I'll share more about that.
• 15:02
  Polly Mertens: But Gary's six practices are turn inward when pain arises.
• 15:06
  Polly Mertens: And pain isn't physical pain, emotional, like just discomfort, right?
• 15:10
  Polly Mertens: Locate the emotion in the body, set conscious intention before action, choose love over fear repeatedly, and see others as souls with frightened active parts.
• 15:22
  Polly Mertens: I love that.
• 15:22
  Polly Mertens: See others as souls with frightened active parts.
• 15:25
  Polly Mertens: I just want to take a little detour.
• 15:27
  Polly Mertens: I was having a conversation with someone yesterday, and all of a sudden, defensive came up.
• 15:31
  Polly Mertens: And I'm noticing now defensive is a triggered response in myself or in others.
• 15:39
  Polly Mertens: So if I'm defending, if I go in defending andor judging, but defending, instantly I'm like, whoa, okay.
• 15:47
  Polly Mertens: There is a fearful part of me.
• 15:49
  Polly Mertens: There's something in there that I'm afraid of or that person is afraid of.
• 15:52
  Polly Mertens: And instead of like running from it or avoiding it or going with it, right?
• 15:59
  Polly Mertens: Like going forward with defensiveness, I'm like, oh, look, there's defensiveness, right?
• 16:03
  Polly Mertens: So yeah, that's man, that's so good.
• 16:08
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, we'll we'll circle back on that maybe.
• 16:10
  Polly Mertens: Gary has the four pillars of authentic power.
• 16:13
  Polly Mertens: So I'll just share those and then we'll go into the next teacher that I want to share with you.
• 16:17
  Polly Mertens: His four pillars of authentic power are emotional awareness.
• 16:22
  Polly Mertens: So awareness, self-awareness of what's going on in our body.
• 16:27
  Polly Mertens: Man, I tell you, this practice, if nothing else, I have been more deeply grounded in my body, emotions and otherwise pain, not feeling well, soreness from training, whatever it is, more deeply connected to the body sensations, which is a the seat of our soul, seat of our subconscious, and all of our emotions live in our body, right?
• 16:51
  Polly Mertens: Or we experience our emotions in our body.
• 16:54
  Polly Mertens: Even if we have thoughts about them in our brain, it's all like the hormonochemicals, the way that it manifests comes through our body.
• 17:03
  Polly Mertens: So sorry, let me get back.
• 17:04
  Polly Mertens: The four pillars emotional awareness, responsible choice, that's yummy, intuition, and trust in the universe.
• 17:13
  Polly Mertens: Okay, so those are the things I want to say about Gary's seat of the soul.
• 17:17
  Polly Mertens: Let me introduce the next like I said, I'm like integrating a lot of this in my study of myself under the seat of the soul.
• 17:25
  Polly Mertens: Again, it's like just all tying in all the works that you you're discovering and you're learning and you're picking up on your path.
• 17:30
  Polly Mertens: So this is the things that I've picked up on my path, where the recent path or a long time of path, that these things start to tie in and my neurons start to wire them together and go, oh, this relates to that, and helps me have better understanding of myself.
• 17:44
  Polly Mertens: So the next one, this was shared with me, a dear dear friend of mine, Jill.
• 17:48
  Polly Mertens: Thank you so much for introducing me to the Gene Keys, which is the work of Richard Rudd, which is a fabulous body of work birthed out of human design, which is something else altogether, but gene keys, you can go get your free gene keys.
• 18:01
  Polly Mertens: I think it's gene keys.com.
• 18:03
  Polly Mertens: Understanding that, so I've been studying that for I don't know, five or six years, maybe something like that.
• 18:10
  Polly Mertens: And I'm getting more and more clear on like the core ones, like my core, you know.
• 18:15
  Polly Mertens: I wouldn't say that I did the gene keys experiments and processes exactly.
• 18:20
  Polly Mertens: So, you know, it's like we're in different classrooms at different times, whatever.
• 18:24
  Polly Mertens: But this all is weaving together.
• 18:26
  Polly Mertens: So Richard Rudd, some things that you would learn from him, or he would talk about is it's a map of your own consciousness written into your genetic code.
• 18:36
  Polly Mertens: And I'm and there's too much to describe about what he means by the genetic code, but like it's like he talks about us as being like hologenetic profiles, meaning like if I'm a being and I'm in three dimensions in space, like I have a front and a back and a top and a bottom or whatever, like I'm a holo holo whole hologenetic, or I'm a three-dimensional being.
• 18:59
  Polly Mertens: Inside of me is like a hologenetic genetic coding, like my genes are running throughout me.
• 19:06
  Polly Mertens: And he he explains it way better than me.
• 19:08
  Polly Mertens: So I'm not gonna go too much into that, but just know the consciousness has like an imprinting, it's like a fingerprint, like a snowflake inside of you, per him, based on your birthday and all this stuff.
• 19:18
  Polly Mertens: And so if you believe that and you study it, which I'm enjoying, because I'm finding little things that, like, oh, that relates to this, and oh yeah, I do see that show up in my life.
• 19:26
  Polly Mertens: So some of the essences and things I want to share with you is he talks about we have keys, we have sort of like like a pattern, like a profile, right?
• 19:37
  Polly Mertens: And so I forget how many keys there are in each human's profile, but let's say there's 10 or 15, right?
• 19:44
  Polly Mertens: And there's like four core ones, and then some other ones that are more related to your person, uh, your relationships, and some are more related to your mental state.
• 19:52
  Polly Mertens: But there's like four core ones.
• 19:54
  Polly Mertens: And one of my core four ones that I want to share with you that I've been seeing show up in various areas that really relates to this in the seat of the soul is my personal example is jean keys five.
• 20:05
  Polly Mertens: I have five in the position called my life's work.
• 20:09
  Polly Mertens: And gene key five, the okay, so each jean key has three phases.
• 20:14
  Polly Mertens: It goes from shadow or it has a shadow aspect, meaning when you're in, I would just call it negative frequency, negative vibration.
• 20:22
  Polly Mertens: They call it in human design, you're not self, which is like when you're not the essence of your key, you're in the shadow side.
• 20:28
  Polly Mertens: You've heard of shadow work probably, so that's the shadow.
• 20:31
  Polly Mertens: So gene key five's shadow is impatience.
• 20:35
  Polly Mertens: The gift is patience, and the city is timeless.
• 20:39
  Polly Mertens: City is like the highest expression, like enlightenment or whatever.
• 20:43
  Polly Mertens: So the city, S-I-D-D-H-I, that's a term you can go look up, is timelessness.
• 20:51
  Polly Mertens: I like to practice staying in the gift because I feel like you know what, if I can work on the gifts in this plane and in this lifetime, if they transform into enlightened states like timelessness or moments of timelessness, fantastic.
• 21:05
  Polly Mertens: But but I think staying at the gift level and working at that is helpful for something for me to grasp onto and work with.
• 21:13
  Polly Mertens: Timelessness, I'm like, fuck, what do I even do with that?
• 21:17
  Polly Mertens: Right.
• 21:18
  Polly Mertens: But patience, yep, I get it.
• 21:22
  Polly Mertens: I get it.
• 21:22
  Polly Mertens: And you know, I note this because I am not a mother, and I knew that if I ever became a mother from all the moms that I know, patience would be something I've heard them spout and spew, like, oh my gosh, the practice of patience.
• 21:35
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, well, I missed that, but guess what?
• 21:37
  Polly Mertens: I'm still working on it in this lifetime, definitely.
• 21:39
  Polly Mertens: So oh, and I can't wait to share with you like how that's really showing up and how I've shifted that.
• 21:47
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, so that's a little bit on the shadows.
• 21:49
  Polly Mertens: That's a personal one personal example that I'm working with.
• 21:52
  Polly Mertens: And one last thing from Richard Rudd, he says, how you hold something determines what frequency you emit from.
• 21:59
  Polly Mertens: This is like your core gene keys and it connects everything.
• 22:03
  Polly Mertens: So, like, how you so I'll share that a little bit later.
• 22:07
  Polly Mertens: I specifically brought up the example of number five.
• 22:09
  Polly Mertens: There's a couple others that I'll probably bring up in this that it also relates to, but how you hold them or are you stay, are you living from your shadow, or are you living from your gift?
• 22:19
  Polly Mertens: Is how I often think about them.
• 22:21
  Polly Mertens: All right.
• 22:21
  Polly Mertens: I want to introduce a teacher that I'm new to, probably in the, I don't know, six or eight.
• 22:26
  Polly Mertens: I get into somebody and then I like really get into them.
• 22:29
  Polly Mertens: So I've been binge watching some of his videos, Joe Hudson.
• 22:32
  Polly Mertens: He is a, I would call him a Buddhist.
• 22:36
  Polly Mertens: I don't know what he's what he is, or whatever, but he's a great coach.
• 22:39
  Polly Mertens: You know, he's got this like dynamic, what do you call it?
• 22:42
  Polly Mertens: He's got a great marketing team on his side behind his business called the Art of Accomplishment.
• 22:48
  Polly Mertens: He's doing real live in uh what do you call it?
• 22:52
  Polly Mertens: Time is the word I want to say.
• 22:55
  Polly Mertens: Like he's doing live coaching sessions one-on-one with his people, with his clients, and recording them, and people are allowing him to share them.
• 23:04
  Polly Mertens: So they're really juicy to see the ninja skills he has to cut away, as we coaches do, from everything that is story, everything that is in the way of our clients realizing seed of the soul moments, essences, being in their truth, being in their emotions.
• 23:24
  Polly Mertens: So I just am really fascinated and loving watching him work because I'm like, that dude's onto something right there.
• 23:31
  Polly Mertens: So good stuff over there.
• 23:32
  Polly Mertens: Kudos to Joe.
• 23:34
  Polly Mertens: So a little bit about him.
• 23:35
  Polly Mertens: Let's see what do I have here.
• 23:36
  Polly Mertens: He's a modern coach, teacher working with presence, emotional honesty.
• 23:40
  Polly Mertens: He calls it emotional flexibility.
• 23:41
  Polly Mertens: I love that.
• 23:42
  Polly Mertens: And dropping our defenses.
• 23:44
  Polly Mertens: And like I would say, like why it's resonating right now, I think, is because I'm studying seed of the soul, and I feel like Joe, in not so many words, is saying, live from the seat of your soul.
• 23:56
  Polly Mertens: He's calling it your awareness or something else.
• 23:59
  Polly Mertens: I'm not remembering exact words, but I know that like these things are coalescing, and there's a reason why I attracted Joe into my awareness because of that.
• 24:08
  Polly Mertens: So, anyway, a couple things that he would say, or let me give you some points about him.
• 24:12
  Polly Mertens: He says, uh, your defensive patterns, such as control, people pleasing, withdrawing, performing.
• 24:18
  Polly Mertens: They were brilliant survival strategies.
• 24:21
  Polly Mertens: Yep.
• 24:21
  Polly Mertens: I talk about this in a lot of my coaching sessions too, is like we survive through our younger years with these survival strategies and then they break down later, right?
• 24:30
  Polly Mertens: They become these chains that bind us, these like patterns that we condition to survive an experience or many experiences or all of childhood or trauma.
• 24:40
  Polly Mertens: But guess what?
• 24:41
  Polly Mertens: They're keeping us from our seat of our soul, our joy, our feeling, you know, fully self-expressed, if you will.
• 24:48
  Polly Mertens: So let's see, he says that they're still running when you no longer need to survive.
• 24:54
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 24:54
  Polly Mertens: And how, oh, I like this from him.
• 24:56
  Polly Mertens: This was a good, like, this was a little humdinger I love.
• 24:59
  Polly Mertens: He said, he was asking this gal, like, so, so what work do you have to do today?
• 25:03
  Polly Mertens: And she said, Well, I should do X, Y, Z.
• 25:05
  Polly Mertens: And he's like, Oh, he's like, should is a shame trigger.
• 25:09
  Polly Mertens: Should is a shame signal, sorry.
• 25:12
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, Whoa, because when we should on ourselves, underlying that or inherent in that is a shame expression.
• 25:20
  Polly Mertens: Like you're ashamed, like I should be doing that, right?
• 25:22
  Polly Mertens: He's like, uh-uh.
• 25:23
  Polly Mertens: It's he transforms that, and I didn't mean to share this here now, but it's like, I get to where I want to, right?
• 25:28
  Polly Mertens: So it's like, oh, I want to this, takes the shame off the table, just puts you back in your power.
• 25:34
  Polly Mertens: So I just want to share that.
• 25:35
  Polly Mertens: I love that part of it.
• 25:36
  Polly Mertens: He calls it a welcoming practice.
• 25:39
  Polly Mertens: You know, he's really big into welcoming the emotions and moving through them.
• 25:44
  Polly Mertens: And if you study him a little bit more, he talks about like, I think where he learned this and meditated for 10 years and all these things, but man, the guy is a master at dancing with, partying with, hanging out with, like fully celebrating our emotions.
• 25:58
  Polly Mertens: Like, like literally, they're just these little things, nothing to be afraid of, not little things.
• 26:04
  Polly Mertens: They're they're just experiences in our body.
• 26:07
  Polly Mertens: They're not, they're not tigers, they're not bears.
• 26:11
  Polly Mertens: They're emotions.
• 26:12
  Polly Mertens: They're literally chemical signals and emotional, neuronal wiring and sensations in our body that we're fucking afraid of, that we're afraid to feel.
• 26:22
  Polly Mertens: Controlled, we're doing a really good job of controlling ourselves from feeling it.
• 26:26
  Polly Mertens: So his welcoming practice is just so awesome to witness.
• 26:31
  Polly Mertens: Let's see, he says the moment you welcome fear or tension without trying to change it, you've already shifted out of ego and into something deeper.
• 26:39
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, he's just like this like get into your awareness, like that seat of the soul awareness, like go back there.
• 26:46
  Polly Mertens: I kind of feel like for me, it's like out in my face is like my ego, and back in like the deeper recesses of my body and my heart is where my soul sits.
• 26:59
  Polly Mertens: It doesn't sit like out in the front, people pleasing, controlling, rushing, you know, conniving, whatever, you know, performing.
• 27:08
  Polly Mertens: It's like the seat of my soul is just like this calm, still water essence that is connected to everything.
• 27:18
  Polly Mertens: And it's not in a hurry.
• 27:19
  Polly Mertens: It's doing absolutely nothing to show off.
• 27:22
  Polly Mertens: It's doing no performing, controlling, nothing needs to change.
• 27:27
  Polly Mertens: It's just like deep awareness, right?
• 27:30
  Polly Mertens: And when we're welcoming from that place, these emotions, it's like, it's almost like a big mama saying, Come bring me your upset and let me hold it.
• 27:39
  Polly Mertens: Let me hold it with you.
• 27:41
  Polly Mertens: Let me have you get upset like a child that was never allowed to feel that upset, crankiness, whatever.
• 27:49
  Polly Mertens: And a lot of this is us not having permission to feel our feelings, right?
• 27:54
  Polly Mertens: And I love how he says he's like, he and his wife had some book called Hand in Hand, I think it was called, that they learned some of this or something with their daughters, and it's just beautiful.
• 28:03
  Polly Mertens: So I don't know about that book, but watching him work and watching the practice of being with your emotions is I've just been like totally being with them more, right?
• 28:14
  Polly Mertens: And we don't attach them as us.
• 28:16
  Polly Mertens: I just want to say that like I'm upset, I'm pissed off, I'm angry, whatever.
• 28:22
  Polly Mertens: It's like no I aming.
• 28:24
  Polly Mertens: It's like noticing it in my body.
• 28:26
  Polly Mertens: Like, oh, look, there's disgust, there's sadness, oh look, there's rejection.
• 28:32
  Polly Mertens: Oh, look, there's anxious, there's anxiety, right?
• 28:36
  Polly Mertens: Like noticing it from the seat of the soul, it's it's happening inside of me, but it's not me, right?
• 28:43
  Polly Mertens: Uh, let's see what else we want to say.
• 28:46
  Polly Mertens: So that's his welcoming practice.
• 28:48
  Polly Mertens: And this isn't self-improvement project, he says.
• 28:50
  Polly Mertens: It's understanding the way we are so we can be with the way we are.
• 28:54
  Polly Mertens: And he says, from awareness, our behaviors almost naturally transform.
• 28:58
  Polly Mertens: I love that.
• 28:59
  Polly Mertens: I love that.
• 29:00
  Polly Mertens: Like when we come from the seat of our soul and we are pure awareness, like everything is just like allowed to be.
• 29:07
  Polly Mertens: And there's nothing wrong in that place.
• 29:11
  Polly Mertens: Like when you're like when I'm in my seat of my soul, hey, I'm making better decisions.
• 29:16
  Polly Mertens: I'm not just frantic, if you will.
• 29:19
  Polly Mertens: It's like I can be with little, I don't want to say piddly emotions, but like, you know, it's like fluff it off kind of things.
• 29:28
  Polly Mertens: Let's see, let's see.
• 29:30
  Polly Mertens: He says, once something moves from subconscious to conscious, it begins to shift on its own.
• 29:34
  Polly Mertens: You don't force the change, you illuminate it.
• 29:36
  Polly Mertens: And he was doing some work with a woman recently I saw, and uh, she was forcing like like that fucking cut hustle, gotta go, you know, pushing, I think is what pressure.
• 29:48
  Polly Mertens: She was putting all this pressure on yourself on herself.
• 29:50
  Polly Mertens: And he was like, Well, how do you not push pressure?
• 29:53
  Polly Mertens: And she was like putting pressure to not put pressure, and he's like, No, no, no, no.
• 29:57
  Polly Mertens: It's not more doing.
• 29:59
  Polly Mertens: And like, she almost didn't even know how to do it.
• 30:01
  Polly Mertens: And it's just like all of a sudden there's this softening, just like, huh, like you, like you, you're pushing a boulder up the hill, and you just go, I'm gonna stop pushing, right?
• 30:10
  Polly Mertens: And it's just like a soft, I was thinking like surrender or whatever, but like, wow, you just get to be with your soul, like in your soul, nowhere to go, nowhere to be, nowhere, nothing else, you know, and then doesn't need to do anything.
• 30:24
  Polly Mertens: It's just like, I'm good, you know.
• 30:26
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and yeah, there's he's got good work.
• 30:29
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, all right, so let's talk just briefly about another body of work that I was introduced to.
• 30:34
  Polly Mertens: I'll tell you, it's like all these little threads of life, right?
• 30:37
  Polly Mertens: The five hindrances, the five hindrances from the Buddhist framework, 25-year-old map of the mind's most common obstacles, the five hindrances the Buddhists talk about are desire, aversion, restlessness or worry, sloth or torpor, and doubt.
• 30:56
  Polly Mertens: And we all have these, but we often have like a one primary one or ones we're working on repeatedly.
• 31:01
  Polly Mertens: Mine would be doubt.
• 31:01
  Polly Mertens: Thank you very much.
• 31:02
  Polly Mertens: That's my chinky, and it shows up in chinky 63, I think it is.
• 31:08
  Polly Mertens: But the the shadow side of it is doubt, and the higher frequency is trust or truth, excuse me, truth.
• 31:15
  Polly Mertens: Let's see.
• 31:16
  Polly Mertens: So it's not a judgment of character, it's a weather report for the mind.
• 31:19
  Polly Mertens: Hey, I made that up.
• 31:20
  Polly Mertens: That's cute.
• 31:21
  Polly Mertens: Okay, and the five hundreds in Buddhist, they say the rain practice, they say, is R-A-I-N, recognize, allow, investigate, and not identify.
• 31:34
  Polly Mertens: So that's what the Buddhists practice of that.
• 31:36
  Polly Mertens: And the language that shift that changes it is from I am restless, right?
• 31:42
  Polly Mertens: Like I was talking about, to there is restlessness, right?
• 31:45
  Polly Mertens: So the Buddhists also share going from I am to there is.
• 31:50
  Polly Mertens: And I love this.
• 31:51
  Polly Mertens: A I think very much.
• 31:52
  Polly Mertens: You don't have to be Buddhist for this to work.
• 31:53
  Polly Mertens: It's just an honest observation of what the mind does.
• 31:55
  Polly Mertens: Yep.
• 31:56
  Polly Mertens: Right?
• 31:56
  Polly Mertens: We can all go check, yep, the mind does that.
• 31:59
  Polly Mertens: All right.
• 32:00
  Polly Mertens: So let me just share with you, like, I want to like kind of like, what are all four of these like have to do with each other?
• 32:05
  Polly Mertens: And like, what do they agree on?
• 32:06
  Polly Mertens: So the entry point is sensation in the body.
• 32:08
  Polly Mertens: Like where I'm at right now in the seat of the soul is man, more groundedness in my body than like I was telling Sam the other day, I was like, I am feeling more, I don't know how to talk about it, but like centeredness.
• 32:24
  Polly Mertens: Like, and I'll share a little bit more, maybe more uh deeply when I share like what I'm getting out of this, but like I was like halfway out of my body, like almost like if you're running and you like, if I was like a speed demon, you know, and I would like start and there'd be a blur of me, like half of me was out of my body, out in front, rushing to get somewhere.
• 32:46
  Polly Mertens: And so I was only like partially in my body.
• 32:48
  Polly Mertens: And it's like, now I'm not in a hurry.
• 32:50
  Polly Mertens: This genky five, I'm working on, or I'm I'm practicing embodying patience, which is there's nowhere to get to, there's no rush.
• 32:58
  Polly Mertens: So fucking give it up.
• 32:59
  Polly Mertens: Just be here now, be in the present moment, be with this experience, trust in the universe, like all these like things that I've heard for so long.
• 33:09
  Polly Mertens: I'm just embodying and being with.
• 33:12
  Polly Mertens: Wow.
• 33:13
  Polly Mertens: It's like there's a so much more power in my body and my thought.
• 33:19
  Polly Mertens: Like, there's just alignment instead of, like I said, the schmeared half of me was just like this running man kind of image, half out in front.
• 33:28
  Polly Mertens: And like I wasn't fully utilizing all my power or something.
• 33:32
  Polly Mertens: So, so let's see.
• 33:34
  Polly Mertens: So let's say the the what they all agree on, these teachers that I've been sharing is the entry point is sensation.
• 33:41
  Polly Mertens: It's not necessarily an understanding, it's just starting with the body, not with the mind.
• 33:44
  Polly Mertens: Like, don't go upstairs and like try and figure all this out.
• 33:47
  Polly Mertens: Just stay down below your, you know, your neck, stay down below your chest.
• 33:51
  Polly Mertens: Like, that's where the juju's at.
• 33:53
  Polly Mertens: Stay in your heart.
• 33:54
  Polly Mertens: That's really a big part of this, is like soul, the seat, the heart, the gut, stay down there.
• 34:00
  Polly Mertens: Go up to the mind for like questions or intelligence, but like, mm-mm, it's the servant, it's not the master.
• 34:06
  Polly Mertens: They all agree that your patterns, your shadows, your frightened parts, your hindrances, whatever you want to call it, right?
• 34:12
  Polly Mertens: None of them are enemies.
• 34:13
  Polly Mertens: They're just information, right?
• 34:15
  Polly Mertens: They're like old some scars that comes from the, you know, seed of the soul.
• 34:20
  Polly Mertens: I'm sorry, the untethered soul work.
• 34:22
  Polly Mertens: It's like they're just there to show you something, right?
• 34:25
  Polly Mertens: So don't push it away.
• 34:27
  Polly Mertens: Just practice more being with it.
• 34:29
  Polly Mertens: I love this.
• 34:30
  Polly Mertens: There's nothing to fix.
• 34:32
  Polly Mertens: Awareness is the transformer.
• 34:34
  Polly Mertens: It's like through awareness, it's like we give it space.
• 34:38
  Polly Mertens: And there's so much somatic work, like not talk therapy, but like so much somatic work is being with these experiences.
• 34:45
  Polly Mertens: So they can they can move.
• 34:46
  Polly Mertens: It's almost like when people don't cry, they just get all this grief, energy, sadness bottled up.
• 34:53
  Polly Mertens: And it's like you just need a fucking good cry, man.
• 34:56
  Polly Mertens: Like cry or laugh or express or fight or something.
• 34:59
  Polly Mertens: Like just allow the experience, allow the feeling, allow the time bomb to feel like it's gonna go off.
• 35:06
  Polly Mertens: And one thing I was hearing Joe Hudson sharing with somebody who was coaching was like, she was like, Oh, there's sadness there.
• 35:13
  Polly Mertens: And he's like, Well, we'll be with the sadness.
• 35:16
  Polly Mertens: And she was afraid of the sadness.
• 35:18
  Polly Mertens: And he said, Yeah, a lot of people are afraid of the emotion because they think they're gonna get stuck in it.
• 35:22
  Polly Mertens: And it's not just get, and he goes, actually, there's relief.
• 35:26
  Polly Mertens: Like our fears that we're gonna get stuck in it, we're gonna stay in it.
• 35:29
  Polly Mertens: And you know what?
• 35:30
  Polly Mertens: Some people just like love to, because for whatever reason, but like you're like, it's like it's like a passing through.
• 35:36
  Polly Mertens: You're like, I'm gonna feel it.
• 35:38
  Polly Mertens: And he goes, typically what you feel is like a really good relief, like a good cry on the other side of that is like, ah, right?
• 35:45
  Polly Mertens: Or a good outburst is like, cool, I got that off my chest.
• 35:49
  Polly Mertens: I'm fucking back in my power, like I just needed to let that go, right?
• 35:52
  Polly Mertens: Or let off some steam or something.
• 35:54
  Polly Mertens: So really, it's about nothing to fix, just creating the awareness of it.
• 35:59
  Polly Mertens: And once something becomes conscious, it begins to shift and you start to illuminate.
• 36:03
  Polly Mertens: And that's really what I've been focusing on.
• 36:04
  Polly Mertens: I've got my core gene keys, like I have a little post-it note on my desk, and I've been like just more aware of them.
• 36:11
  Polly Mertens: I'm gonna, and I've got this vision of like making it even more aware.
• 36:13
  Polly Mertens: Like, I'm gonna put my four core ones on a little diagram and maybe make it super pretty or something.
• 36:18
  Polly Mertens: I'm like looking around my office right now, like, where could I put that bad boy?
• 36:22
  Polly Mertens: Got that as an insight on my hike this morning.
• 36:24
  Polly Mertens: I was like, yeah, I want to make that like super because I'm like, I'm just experiencing in my body, if I'm a whole hologenetic genky impression, how can I fully embody that and like work with it?
• 36:40
  Polly Mertens: Like, like I'm walking through space with that genetic profile and utilize the gifts of it, not be in the schmear of rushing forward or be afraid of, you know, by doubt or let confusion run the show or all these things.
• 36:54
  Polly Mertens: It's like owning that that is inside of me and coming from that.
• 36:59
  Polly Mertens: And the first step like was like really getting, as it said, my life's work, the core of them, which is five, which is patience, which for me just feels like being in my body, being with where I am right now, not I'm behind.
• 37:13
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, I'll talk more about that.
• 37:14
  Polly Mertens: Okay.
• 37:15
  Polly Mertens: One couple more things.
• 37:16
  Polly Mertens: The body is the compass, contraction.
• 37:19
  Polly Mertens: I would say constriction, tensing, any tightness in the body, it means you've left you, like the soul, like you've left, and expansion means you're home.
• 37:29
  Polly Mertens: So I'll just say that again.
• 37:30
  Polly Mertens: The body is the compass, contracting, tightening means you've left, expansion means you're home, like you're like you're in it.
• 37:37
  Polly Mertens: The returning is the practice.
• 37:39
  Polly Mertens: You don't arrive permanently, you build the muscle of coming back faster and faster.
• 37:44
  Polly Mertens: I love that.
• 37:45
  Polly Mertens: You know, it's just like I see Joe, and one of the things he said, and I think he's been practicing this for a long, long time, is like he said something like, I know when rejection shows up, he gets excited about it.
• 37:58
  Polly Mertens: He's like, great, like, like he gets to experience it, like another practice, almost like, yes, you know, like an opportunity to do the work and be in what his soul is here to be and experience and live, and and not like like a flat, like a flogging, you know, like, oh, like you're bad, but like like making you better, like making you your potential, not being hindered or held back by it or afraid of it, so that you can fully embody, like, yeah, fuck it, go for it.
• 38:25
  Polly Mertens: Like, doubt.
• 38:26
  Polly Mertens: Good doubt.
• 38:27
  Polly Mertens: Thanks.
• 38:28
  Polly Mertens: Okay.
• 38:28
  Polly Mertens: And let me lean towards the the you know, the gift side of that, which is like get curious, like be an inquiry, right?
• 38:36
  Polly Mertens: So I can find my truth.
• 38:37
  Polly Mertens: And so good.
• 38:39
  Polly Mertens: All right, and all of these, whether it's Gary Zuckoff, Seat of the Soul, Gene Keys, Joe Hudson, Buddhism are teaching so much is the same, right?
• 38:49
  Polly Mertens: I don't know if you've gotten the woven, like if you could weave together what I've already shared with you, I hope you're starting to see how they're coalescing and they work together.
• 38:58
  Polly Mertens: But that's just my mind anyway.
• 39:00
  Polly Mertens: I see the dots.
• 39:00
  Polly Mertens: I hope you can see the dots connecting.
• 39:02
  Polly Mertens: So let me share with you a couple of points now that I've set the stage for all of this.
• 39:06
  Polly Mertens: So, you know, I've talked a little bit about this, but your body doesn't lie.
• 39:11
  Polly Mertens: I want to, I'm gonna just kind of go into that right now.
• 39:14
  Polly Mertens: So, you know, there's a great book out there, The Body Keeps the Score.
• 39:17
  Polly Mertens: Whoo, good book.
• 39:19
  Polly Mertens: There's a reason why it was a bestseller and continues to be quoted.
• 39:22
  Polly Mertens: Okay.
• 39:22
  Polly Mertens: So, as I've said, you know, teaching that contraction is you've left your body, you're you're holding, you're trying to control, you're afraid of something, you're not in your full awareness, your grounded seat of the soul self.
• 39:34
  Polly Mertens: Expansion is like your home, like you're just welcoming it.
• 39:37
  Polly Mertens: It's like, all right, you get the the wholeness of you.
• 39:41
  Polly Mertens: So your mind will rationalize fear as logic all day long, but the body just tells you the truth.
• 39:47
  Polly Mertens: And so one of the things for me is like I'm just getting more still, getting more quiet, going, I just sort of like feel like I'm dropping down a few levels in my staircase or going, taking the elevator down instead of being upstairs in the mind when I'm checking in with myself and like, hmm, what do what do I feel about this?
• 40:08
  Polly Mertens: Like, what's true for me?
• 40:10
  Polly Mertens: Before that schmeared me, was like, go, hurry, run, you gotta get yeah, go, you know, and it was like always trying to get somewhere, letting the mind run it from fear instead of being like down in the soul going, no, I trust.
• 40:23
  Polly Mertens: I trust myself, I trust the universe, I trust things are always working out for me.
• 40:27
  Polly Mertens: Okay, what what is there to do or not do right now?
• 40:30
  Polly Mertens: And coming from that place, right?
• 40:32
  Polly Mertens: So mine, I'm like, yeah, I don't have time.
• 40:35
  Polly Mertens: And there's great work Joe talks about like experimenting with like how to talk with that monkey mine.
• 40:40
  Polly Mertens: I'll let you dive into that with him if you choose.
• 40:42
  Polly Mertens: But so how I'm using physical sensation as my real-time compass is just a like planning my day, like I'm using it like, okay, what's most important right now?
• 40:52
  Polly Mertens: So previously is like, oh, I said these like I need to do this, you know, for the next hundred days, only do it like this.
• 40:58
  Polly Mertens: And now I'm like giving myself a framework.
• 41:00
  Polly Mertens: Okay, like I'm working in, I'm calling it my flow zone.
• 41:02
  Polly Mertens: So it's like, okay, two hours flow zone.
• 41:05
  Polly Mertens: And like going inward and being like, what's most important right now?
• 41:08
  Polly Mertens: And letting inner wisdom and guidance come from there's time for this.
• 41:14
  Polly Mertens: This is important, this is meaningful, this is where my soul gets to express.
• 41:18
  Polly Mertens: Turn off the phone, turn off the things, whatever.
• 41:20
  Polly Mertens: Who cares about the past or the future, whatever?
• 41:22
  Polly Mertens: Like, what's real now?
• 41:24
  Polly Mertens: And taking in information.
• 41:25
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, you know, like sitting with, you know, what am I working on?
• 41:30
  Polly Mertens: What's important?
• 41:31
  Polly Mertens: What am I trying to accomplish?
• 41:32
  Polly Mertens: What's my intention?
• 41:33
  Polly Mertens: All of that, but fucking getting grounded in me and and then choosing what the action is, right?
• 41:40
  Polly Mertens: And so I just stop paying attention to what's upstairs in the mind.
• 41:43
  Polly Mertens: Like I'm aware of it more so than ever.
• 41:46
  Polly Mertens: You know, as a student of neuroscience, NLP, neurolinguistic programming, and hypnotherapy, there's so much beauty in like, you know, working with and reframing the mind and the neuroassociative patterns and all that stuff.
• 41:58
  Polly Mertens: And this feels like a shortcut.
• 42:00
  Polly Mertens: This feels like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 42:02
  Polly Mertens: All that noise up there.
• 42:04
  Polly Mertens: Like, great.
• 42:06
  Polly Mertens: And what does my soul want?
• 42:07
  Polly Mertens: What is my, and you know, and and really I feel like there's this aligning coming from that energy, like it's gonna naturally rewire what my mind is thinking.
• 42:16
  Polly Mertens: Like it comes from the a different place.
• 42:19
  Polly Mertens: Let's see, a little bit about here.
• 42:22
  Polly Mertens: So in the body, Gary Zhukov calls it these energy processing centers.
• 42:26
  Polly Mertens: Some places or some bodies of work yoga would call it like your chakras or something like that.
• 42:32
  Polly Mertens: But, you know, where are we sitting with whatever energy is is happening, like whatever an emotion is happening, what is a thought creating in us, and noticing if we're constricting or if we're fully just like, yeah, I'm cool, right?
• 42:45
  Polly Mertens: So it's it's about feeling it, it's locating it, not acting from it.
• 42:50
  Polly Mertens: For me, I would just say, you know, mostly what I want to say about this is I'm just coming from a calm, peaceful place, like a truly grounded, like all's well, man.
• 43:06
  Polly Mertens: All is fucking well, and everything is working out well.
• 43:10
  Polly Mertens: And when I'm there, yeah, let's go, right?
• 43:14
  Polly Mertens: And when I get into little fear mind about tightness or contriction or hurry, I just go, nope.
• 43:21
  Polly Mertens: Feels better to be down here in the heart, and all is well.
• 43:25
  Polly Mertens: So that's some of what I'm working on.
• 43:28
  Polly Mertens: And so let me share with you from a personal standpoint some of the three that I would say I'm most working on right now in terms of my gene keys and my self-awareness and how I'm like incorporating all of this from the seat of the soul.
• 43:41
  Polly Mertens: So, one is I was referring to as like this rushing, this impatience key, this shadow side of like impatience, rushing.
• 43:48
  Polly Mertens: I'm behind, I gotta hurry, do more, put more things on my to-do list and all this stuff.
• 43:53
  Polly Mertens: And I'm really letting that go.
• 43:55
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, I'm trusting the timing and what I'm tuning into and trusting is I'm gonna be in the right rooms, I'm gonna be in the right places, I'm going to have the insights that I need to have.
• 44:07
  Polly Mertens: I'm going to make the decisions, trusting all of like my yeses and my no's from like a place of inner fucking like certainty, like where that's soul.
• 44:19
  Polly Mertens: Is as opposed to doing 33 things from a state of fear, like the rushing and the overproducing and over-achieving and stuff like that, that frantic hustle.
• 44:31
  Polly Mertens: I was like, I could do all of that and get like a tenth of the results, maybe, right?
• 44:37
  Polly Mertens: So it's like, what's most important?
• 44:39
  Polly Mertens: So if I, if you look at it like Pareto's Law, am I doing the 20% that makes 80% of the difference?
• 44:46
  Polly Mertens: I guess that's how I would liken to this shift for me, is it's not about volume, it's now about, you know, velocity and creativity and centeredness and core essence of what most wants to happen right now, not volume.
• 45:01
  Polly Mertens: So and then the second one, doubt.
• 45:05
  Polly Mertens: Good old doubt.
• 45:06
  Polly Mertens: Jinky63.
• 45:09
  Polly Mertens: The gift is, you know, inquiry and the essence, I believe the city is truth.
• 45:14
  Polly Mertens: And it's like I learned something the other day called skillful doubt.
• 45:19
  Polly Mertens: Skillful doubt.
• 45:20
  Polly Mertens: So skillful doubt is doubt has a place.
• 45:24
  Polly Mertens: Using it skillfully is what masters do.
• 45:27
  Polly Mertens: They don't let it run them and they never self-doubt.
• 45:30
  Polly Mertens: Like you never apply doubt towards yourself.
• 45:33
  Polly Mertens: Like you totally own, and I get this.
• 45:35
  Polly Mertens: Like I've definitely had periods or times or some areas of certainty in my life where I'm like, oh yeah, if I can totally trust myself.
• 45:42
  Polly Mertens: Like, yep, I got that, right?
• 45:43
  Polly Mertens: Like, speak on stage, do this, go for that.
• 45:45
  Polly Mertens: What, you know, like I was gonna do Iron Man, yep, I can do that, right?
• 45:48
  Polly Mertens: It was gonna be hard, but I could do it.
• 45:50
  Polly Mertens: It's like knowing what you're capable of and like knowing it even when you haven't had any experience of it.
• 45:55
  Polly Mertens: Just like, yeah, I could do that, right?
• 45:57
  Polly Mertens: And believing.
• 45:58
  Polly Mertens: And so I'm no longer afraid of doubt.
• 46:02
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, oh, there's doubt.
• 46:03
  Polly Mertens: Okay, what's there to, you know, or just noticing it like a little nuisance, kind of flicking it off like a fly, right?
• 46:09
  Polly Mertens: I'm I'm practicing, as Joe Hudson says, practice and experiment with how do you talk to, how do you interact with these shadow sides, these little patterns of thought, if you will, these, you know, success strategies that we create as little humans and we live into.
• 46:25
  Polly Mertens: And it's just like, oh, there's old doubt, you know, and not being like, because I thought I was doubt.
• 46:32
  Polly Mertens: Like I thought that was me.
• 46:34
  Polly Mertens: I was like doubting myself.
• 46:36
  Polly Mertens: Oh, I'm doubt, whatever.
• 46:38
  Polly Mertens: And maybe the pattern was I was, but like now it's like this thing I'm aware of, I have, or it shows up.
• 46:45
  Polly Mertens: And one thing that was super powerful for me was, and I've, you know what?
• 46:50
  Polly Mertens: You probably I've probably heard this like more than 20 times in my life, but it hit it landed the other day, which is like we're not in control of our thoughts.
• 47:00
  Polly Mertens: They are literally just popping up.
• 47:02
  Polly Mertens: They're just freaking like popcorn, like like whack-a-mole, like fucking whack-a-mole.
• 47:06
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, like who knows what's what's next?
• 47:08
  Polly Mertens: Who knows what thought you're gonna have, right?
• 47:10
  Polly Mertens: Like if you're in an argument or you know, if you're deep in conversation or something.
• 47:13
  Polly Mertens: But man, if you just like pause, the monkey mindness, the jumping around that our mind does, if we actually track those thoughts, it's ridiculous.
• 47:22
  Polly Mertens: So it's like, of course, like, okay, so doubt's gonna pop up.
• 47:25
  Polly Mertens: It's like I didn't intend it, I didn't want it, but it's like, okay, there's doubt, just like there's anxiety, there's happiness, there's joy, there's bewilderment.
• 47:35
  Polly Mertens: Okay, doubt.
• 47:36
  Polly Mertens: It's just one of the seven dwarfs of, you know, whatever the 72 dwarfs of emotions or thought patterns.
• 47:43
  Polly Mertens: Okay, but I'm not owning it.
• 47:44
  Polly Mertens: I'm not like, and I'm not applying it to myself any longer.
• 47:47
  Polly Mertens: I'm just like, yo, I am a soul.
• 47:50
  Polly Mertens: Y'all better watch out.
• 47:52
  Polly Mertens: Like, like I love Oprah's just got such great energy around this.
• 47:55
  Polly Mertens: Like, she is so insanely confident of who she is as a soul.
• 47:59
  Polly Mertens: And I'm like, yes, sister.
• 48:01
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, mm-hmm.
• 48:02
  Polly Mertens: So doubt can be a thought or it can be skillful doubt, but it's not applied to me any longer.
• 48:08
  Polly Mertens: Me, the highest me, the essence of me.
• 48:11
  Polly Mertens: And I'm certainly not clinging to it, if you will.
• 48:14
  Polly Mertens: So I'm just noticing it like a mm-mm-mm.
• 48:17
  Polly Mertens: And then the last one is like this compares.
• 48:19
  Polly Mertens: I don't, I don't even know necessarily where this one shows up.
• 48:22
  Polly Mertens: I think it's in my my gene key where the the shadow is compromise, which is 35, I think.
• 48:30
  Polly Mertens: I have to remember, I forget which one it is.
• 48:32
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, compromise is shadow, competence is the other side.
• 48:37
  Polly Mertens: I think it's 35.
• 48:38
  Polly Mertens: Might be wrong on that.
• 48:40
  Polly Mertens: Anyway, and the comparison.
• 48:42
  Polly Mertens: So I was really present.
• 48:44
  Polly Mertens: Like I was doing this body of work, I don't remember exactly what it was tied to, but it was always like money patterns.
• 48:50
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, where do these come from?
• 48:51
  Polly Mertens: And I did some like inner work and I found like an old, old story of like comparing myself as a little girl riding on the buses, and my dad lived in not great neighborhoods, and you know, that was him.
• 49:04
  Polly Mertens: Like, here's here's the shift.
• 49:05
  Polly Mertens: Okay, so I'll tell you this little story all anecdote is so what the story, what the video tape that looks like, or you know, my recollection of the video in my mind, and get it, it's like snippets.
• 49:16
  Polly Mertens: It's not like I've got the whole video, it's like, you know, what do you call it in movie production?
• 49:21
  Polly Mertens: It's like skip to like this and cut to and cut to this.
• 49:24
  Polly Mertens: So like there's these little cuts of my video.
• 49:26
  Polly Mertens: So it's not the whole thing, but it's like cut to me leaving my dad's apartment in this like not great neighborhood.
• 49:33
  Polly Mertens: And I'm just like, it's not horrible.
• 49:36
  Polly Mertens: It's not like it was so bad.
• 49:37
  Polly Mertens: Like I was scared for my life, but it was like, okay, I knew this wasn't like a sunshiny, rainbowy kind of neighborhood.
• 49:43
  Polly Mertens: And then I get on the bus and they cut to some kids are on the bus and they're dressed nicely, and they cut to this neighborhood.
• 49:49
  Polly Mertens: And I'm looking out the window and I'm seeing these like really nice houses, you know, with beautiful lawns and beautiful big houses.
• 49:55
  Polly Mertens: And I'm like, wow, just like admiring, right?
• 49:59
  Polly Mertens: And then they get off and I'm like, and then cut to me in the school bus, admiring them, not having, noticing where I just came from, but and then like cut to getting off on the school bus, you know.
• 50:09
  Polly Mertens: And I don't even, I'm sure I was aware of it because like I have this as like a I don't know if like the awareness of me doing that, or like the little me, like seeing those things, if if I if I was actually aware of, you know, feeling less than or feeling impoverished, but I think there was a thing about like me looking at other people and being like, oh, they have more than I do.
• 50:30
  Polly Mertens: They're better than me, they have nicer things, I don't have nice things, whatever.
• 50:35
  Polly Mertens: And the adult me now going back into that story and revisiting it, like from a like looking at that story, looking at those clips.
• 50:43
  Polly Mertens: I was like, the essence of me, the soul me in there was a beautiful little soul, was a beautiful little girl, was like totally perfect in all ways, you know, just as children are.
• 50:55
  Polly Mertens: And it was my dad's environment, his lack of resources, if you will, that I was in the environment of, right?
• 51:04
  Polly Mertens: It had nothing to do with me.
• 51:06
  Polly Mertens: I had no say in where we lived and how much we had and what I wore, you know.
• 51:11
  Polly Mertens: I mean, maybe a little bit of what I wore, but whatever, you know what I mean.
• 51:14
  Polly Mertens: Like that was just me growing up inside of his world and then seeing the contrast.
• 51:20
  Polly Mertens: And I at the time made it up like I wasn't enough.
• 51:24
  Polly Mertens: Like I don't have nice things.
• 51:26
  Polly Mertens: Other people have nice things, all this stuff.
• 51:29
  Polly Mertens: And then like I put this light on it and I went, that wasn't even true.
• 51:33
  Polly Mertens: Like, that was just little me, a totally beautiful young soul, six-year-old little girl, like bubbly life, whatever.
• 51:40
  Polly Mertens: And I made myself wrong or not enough because of the environment that I was growing up in.
• 51:47
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, wow, and I've lived as if that's true.
• 51:50
  Polly Mertens: And notice where in times of my life I continue to see the outer world through that little paradigm.
• 51:57
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, whoa.
• 51:58
  Polly Mertens: And it's like, A, there's nothing inherently wrong with me now, and there's nothing inherently wrong with me then, any of that, like nothing is wrong with any of us, right?
• 52:06
  Polly Mertens: Like we can have moments of being in our doubt or our confusion or whatever and incompetence or compromise.
• 52:13
  Polly Mertens: But like the essence of who I am, the seat of my soul, and there's great work on this with Joe's podcast, is like, I'm whole, complete, and perfect.
• 52:22
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, whoa, what if I start looking at the world through that lens?
• 52:26
  Polly Mertens: And part of what I'm doing around this is practicing gratitude for what I have now instead of this lackful, because I one of my woof patterns for decades has been coming at the world from a place of lackfulness and scarcity and not enough time and not enough money and resources and all these things, which is crazy because I live a very joyful, abundant life, and I'm very creative with the money that I do have and stretching it and the ability that I have from times of not having much.
• 52:58
  Polly Mertens: And I'm like, wow.
• 52:59
  Polly Mertens: So part of my practice in the seed of the soul is Joe recommends uh 10 minutes a day, twice a day, of gratitude, especially around that area that you're most working on.
• 53:10
  Polly Mertens: And for me, that's right now, like this money was showing up.
• 53:13
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, all right, so I'm doing that.
• 53:15
  Polly Mertens: It's been great.
• 53:17
  Polly Mertens: It's been really great.
• 53:18
  Polly Mertens: So I just wanted to share all of that as like this is what's happening inside of me, inside of my story, and like recognizing these patterns and not being run by them, right?
• 53:27
  Polly Mertens: So a few things I want to say.
• 53:29
  Polly Mertens: Let's see, the gene keys reframe.
• 53:30
  Polly Mertens: So my impatience is patience trying to be born through me.
• 53:34
  Polly Mertens: My doubt is clarity in its contracted form.
• 53:38
  Polly Mertens: It's like, I'm getting so, I'm so utilizing these gene keys, these essences of who I am and being aware of them as a way to transform them, as a way to live in the higher state of them, as a way to not be run by them, as a way to not be in the shadow side.
• 53:54
  Polly Mertens: It's so great.
• 53:55
  Polly Mertens: You might say, from Gary Zhukov's standpoint, it's like these parts aren't broken.
• 54:00
  Polly Mertens: They're just farting frarted, frightened parts that are not yet redirected for the soul or from the soul.
• 54:08
  Polly Mertens: So Joe Hudson would say these are brilliant survival strategies and honor them and just choose differently.
• 54:14
  Polly Mertens: And that's what I'm doing.
• 54:15
  Polly Mertens: So I'm just, you know, share a little bit about how I'm doing these experiments.
• 54:20
  Polly Mertens: I've I've said, you know, one of my questions right now is, and Sam gave me this question is like, what would love do?
• 54:26
  Polly Mertens: Right.
• 54:26
  Polly Mertens: So asking myself, what would love do in my mornings?
• 54:30
  Polly Mertens: Like I said, I'm I'm doing my gratitude practices 10 minutes in the morning, in the evening, just feeling into deep, deep gratitude for what I have now.
• 54:40
  Polly Mertens: I'm I'm questioning when, you know, an old pattern shows up, a doubt pattern, a compromise, a devaluing myself, a compare, like I catch myself now.
• 54:49
  Polly Mertens: Like I'm like there's just this spotlight on these, at least these three patterns that I was just going into the rushing, the doubting, and then the comparing.
• 54:58
  Polly Mertens: And I'm just like aware of it.
• 55:00
  Polly Mertens: And the awareness is like just dissipating.
• 55:03
  Polly Mertens: It's like, oh no, that's what I used to do.
• 55:05
  Polly Mertens: Oh no, that's that's I'm not choosing that.
• 55:07
  Polly Mertens: Or maybe I could run through it, but then I'm catching it, right?
• 55:10
  Polly Mertens: So I'm I'm just welcoming what arises and I'm just not fixing it.
• 55:14
  Polly Mertens: I'm just like, ah, okay, there it is.
• 55:16
  Polly Mertens: And I'm just going back more and more into that, like dropping down in my elevator to my seat of my soul, into my heart and into my gut, and being with me in patience, being with my most grounded self.
• 55:30
  Polly Mertens: Like I feel like I have two fucking feet on the planet right now, fully embodying me as a soul, instead of this gotta get somewhere, not enoughness, people pleasing, performing, whatever.
• 55:44
  Polly Mertens: It's like, oh, I'm like, I'm all here, baby.
• 55:46
  Polly Mertens: I'm all here.
• 55:48
  Polly Mertens: And what's arising is yeah, there's no like, like I said, it's like these little patterns, these little thought patterns of ways of being, of like old paradigms of comparing and doubting and fleeing and fighting and rushing.
• 56:01
  Polly Mertens: It's just like, I'm just like flicking them off.
• 56:03
  Polly Mertens: Just like, nope, don't need to be that.
• 56:05
  Polly Mertens: Nope, don't need to be that.
• 56:06
  Polly Mertens: And just like regrounding, just it's almost like how do I want to say this is like like I was sharing earlier, like I'm a schmear and I'm just like staying fully in the letting my soul be fully in this body.
• 56:19
  Polly Mertens: And being that means being in the present too.
• 56:22
  Polly Mertens: Like if I'm fully in my body and I'm fully in my breath in this moment, I am all of me here, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically in all of my bodies.
• 56:32
  Polly Mertens: And I just have I just want to say like superpowers, like more access to all that wants to show up, all that wants to be communicated to me and through me from the soul, from the higher consciousness, from the deep-seated self, from the future self, instead of a fearful not enough, not getting there enough, doubting if I'm doing it right.
• 56:55
  Polly Mertens: All that, excuse me, fucking monkey business that was going on is like like like there's a clearing of the windshield.
• 57:04
  Polly Mertens: You know, it's like I can see much more clearly now.
• 57:06
  Polly Mertens: And decisions are being made just I'm gonna say like slower, more slowly and more grounded.
• 57:15
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and you know, I'm doing some of that, recognizing the shoulding and getting to and wanting to and replacing that and just spotting these patterns easier, right?
• 57:26
  Polly Mertens: Now, yeah, like I said, I'm like 10 days in.
• 57:28
  Polly Mertens: It's been amazing.
• 57:29
  Polly Mertens: And I'm really enjoying the deep dive into Joe Hudson's work and watching him work with people, and then I'm like, and you know, it's not like transformation happens when you just hear about it, read about it, see it done, whatever.
• 57:40
  Polly Mertens: And it's like, oh great, cool, that's for somebody else.
• 57:41
  Polly Mertens: It's like, and bring that into my life.
• 57:44
  Polly Mertens: Like, what do I do in this moment?
• 57:46
  Polly Mertens: How do I do it in my life and in my everyday?
• 57:50
  Polly Mertens: So that's what's most important.
• 57:53
  Polly Mertens: So, you know, these are some of my aha moments, is how I'd been living.
• 58:00
  Polly Mertens: And I was, you know, I was so keen earlier this year.
• 58:04
  Polly Mertens: Like my frequency was just vibrating at such a fear level, you know, money and time and lack, lack, lack, lack, lack.
• 58:13
  Polly Mertens: It was just this like scarcity was driving everything.
• 58:15
  Polly Mertens: And I was just like, yuck, like I couldn't, I couldn't be in my own body of that body, that frequency anymore.
• 58:22
  Polly Mertens: And now I'm just like plenty, timeless, nowhere to get to, no, no performing.
• 58:31
  Polly Mertens: All of that is like dissolved, and just have a have a yummy.
• 58:36
  Polly Mertens: If I check in, I'm kind of like there's just a nice, it's almost like there's an ohm inside of me.
• 58:43
  Polly Mertens: Uh like ohm.
• 58:45
  Polly Mertens: And it's like inside of that ohm from my from my soul resonates love.
• 58:52
  Polly Mertens: It's not performing, it's not a lackful state.
• 58:56
  Polly Mertens: So that's that's some of it.
• 58:58
  Polly Mertens: And yeah, I would say my decisions are more just like mmm, like a yeah, like a grounded yes instead of a fearful, oh, I have to, or you know, I just remember the volume I was doing.
• 59:10
  Polly Mertens: I'm still doing a lot.
• 59:11
  Polly Mertens: I'm not saying I'm like not doing, but I had this hundred days, and I was, you know, I was out to make a hundred videos on a hundred days, and I was like, blah blah.
• 59:19
  Polly Mertens: And like the franticness that I was operating from when I started that, I'm just like, and I was like, yo, this is not sustainable.
• 59:27
  Polly Mertens: And I knew it and whatever.
• 59:28
  Polly Mertens: And then last week I broke it down and I did like four in a week, and so that I could like not have that pressure of doing them each week that I was putting upon myself.
• 59:34
  Polly Mertens: It was like, now I have this spaciousness, like, okay, I've completed that and I'll come back in three weeks and I'll do four more.
• 59:39
  Polly Mertens: It just worked better.
• 59:40
  Polly Mertens: Like I made a better decision instead of trying to frantically every week get one out.
• 59:44
  Polly Mertens: I was like, yo, what if I just do all of them in a week?
• 59:48
  Polly Mertens: And then like, yo, do all this other great amazing stuff that I'm guided to.
• 59:53
  Polly Mertens: So I'm not like, like, just like that shift is like me coming from a different place, like trusting inside of me.
• 1:00:01
  Polly Mertens: Like, yo, Alex says Alex Hermozzi was where that idea came from, his hundred minutes a day.
• 1:00:06
  Polly Mertens: I was like, yo, what if I just took those hundred minutes or two hours a day and I just was in my flow and it was for the right intent?
• 1:00:13
  Polly Mertens: What would I be doing instead of you gotta do videos, you gotta be making video?
• 1:00:17
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, yo, that's not how we're doing it over here.
• 1:00:19
  Polly Mertens: But that was chosen from that seat of the soul.
• 1:00:22
  Polly Mertens: Like I made a different in determination of what worked for me, not giving up the goal, not giving up the intention.
• 1:00:28
  Polly Mertens: I'm still out to make 13 videos by August 31st.
• 1:00:31
  Polly Mertens: That is happening, but not the way that I was going about it, right?
• 1:00:36
  Polly Mertens: And it's like, yo, okay, right.
• 1:00:39
  Polly Mertens: And I'm just seeing little and small decisions and ways that being that I'm taking on in my business and choosing things that are like, yep, doing that.
• 1:00:48
  Polly Mertens: Nope, not doing, you know, and it's just it's like uh executive level.
• 1:00:53
  Polly Mertens: It's like I'm in my executive space of grounded in knowing what's right for me.
• 1:00:59
  Polly Mertens: And from there, not have to, you know, should do frantic what if I don't kind of energy, but like, yeah, this is this is this is what I need to do right now, like a solid fucking yes, like a hell yes.
• 1:01:12
  Polly Mertens: Okay.
• 1:01:13
  Polly Mertens: So what else do I want to share about this?
• 1:01:16
  Polly Mertens: So you, all right.
• 1:01:17
  Polly Mertens: Well, I think that's all I wanted to say about this.
• 1:01:20
  Polly Mertens: This has been way longer.
• 1:01:22
  Polly Mertens: So thank you for hanging out with me if you've been here.
• 1:01:24
  Polly Mertens: I want to share with you some things that, you know, as an invitation, how you can get into action.
• 1:01:29
  Polly Mertens: Uh, because we're Sam and I are all about like, yo, like it's great that you're listening to this, but don't fucking listen this long and not do something.
• 1:01:36
  Polly Mertens: All right.
• 1:01:36
  Polly Mertens: So this is you.
• 1:01:37
  Polly Mertens: So this is you, like, okay, here's what you can get up to.
• 1:01:39
  Polly Mertens: Just some ideas.
• 1:01:40
  Polly Mertens: You may have already gotten plenty of ideas.
• 1:01:42
  Polly Mertens: So these are just like, if nothing's coming for you, like, what do I, where do I start?
• 1:01:46
  Polly Mertens: Like, that's what I want to answer here.
• 1:01:47
  Polly Mertens: It's like, all right, where do I start with this?
• 1:01:49
  Polly Mertens: So I would say, you know, watch maybe check out some of these other resources that I've talked about.
• 1:01:56
  Polly Mertens: I think Joe Hudson's videos on like being with your emotions and some of his content is really great.
• 1:02:02
  Polly Mertens: But yo, you don't need to watch any of it.
• 1:02:04
  Polly Mertens: It's like finding that awareness, that sense of you, like I was talking about, it feels like it's coming from my my heart, which for me feels like going downstairs or like going into my taking the elevator down because fuck, I'm so lived my life so much up in my head, which is easy.
• 1:02:20
  Polly Mertens: So that's why it feels like going down.
• 1:02:22
  Polly Mertens: So like physiologically, down in my body.
• 1:02:25
  Polly Mertens: So for you, it's like, how can you be aware more so of the emotions and allowing them?
• 1:02:32
  Polly Mertens: Like that's first step is like, man, self-awareness, what is wanting to be felt?
• 1:02:38
  Polly Mertens: Stop pushing it away, stop forcing it, stop hiding it, just like whole creating coming from that place of awareness.
• 1:02:45
  Polly Mertens: So you're like this big old jar, big old container.
• 1:02:48
  Polly Mertens: I think of like this big, solid, almost like, you know, when they when there's these people that they're bomb detectors or something like that.
• 1:02:56
  Polly Mertens: So like they go out and they find bombs and they put them in these, like, I don't know, let's call it like a tank, and then the bomb gets to explode inside of it.
• 1:03:03
  Polly Mertens: And it's like, yeah, no problem.
• 1:03:05
  Polly Mertens: Didn't like bust out the world, didn't like break the container.
• 1:03:08
  Polly Mertens: Like you become a container for these emotions so they can frickin' blow up or they can be big or they can be fully expressed or whatever, and they move through you.
• 1:03:16
  Polly Mertens: They just, they, they, you allow the energy to flow.
• 1:03:19
  Polly Mertens: And one of the things I've seen with Joe's work is like people talk about when they start having emotion, even emotion like sadness, they start getting hot and they sweat.
• 1:03:27
  Polly Mertens: And he's like, Yeah, that's what happens.
• 1:03:28
  Polly Mertens: Because like there's all this fucking energy that's stored inside of us, and it's like, once it moves, like energy moves and heat flows and blood flow and all this stuff.
• 1:03:37
  Polly Mertens: It's so good.
• 1:03:38
  Polly Mertens: So that would be one of the things is like, how can you begin to really be with your emotions and allow the shit out of them?
• 1:03:44
  Polly Mertens: Allow like a big old bomb shelter, like go big, right?
• 1:03:49
  Polly Mertens: And one of the things I love, Joe says, is don't do your emotions at people.
• 1:03:52
  Polly Mertens: So this is like self-containment as best you can, depending on what's causing the reaction.
• 1:03:59
  Polly Mertens: You might be in a heated moment, but like don't open the door of your bomb shelter and like throw it at the person, right?
• 1:04:05
  Polly Mertens: It's like, okay, contain it, like allow it to burst.
• 1:04:08
  Polly Mertens: Like, and you may even need to like speak something, but don't do your emotion at that person.
• 1:04:13
  Polly Mertens: It's like, hey, I like I often say, like, I'm emotionally hijacked right now, and like I gotta step out if something is blowing up inside of me.
• 1:04:21
  Polly Mertens: I don't want to blow up on your face.
• 1:04:23
  Polly Mertens: I don't want to blow up in your ears right now.
• 1:04:26
  Polly Mertens: All right.
• 1:04:26
  Polly Mertens: And then you might do number two.
• 1:04:28
  Polly Mertens: I'm gonna do three steps.
• 1:04:30
  Polly Mertens: So, first one, feeling that shit out of those emotions.
• 1:04:33
  Polly Mertens: Let that bomb blow, baby.
• 1:04:35
  Polly Mertens: Um, but don't do your emotions at people.
• 1:04:37
  Polly Mertens: Do them with yourself, you know, enjoy them, experience them, and start to enjoy them.
• 1:04:42
  Polly Mertens: I mean that literally.
• 1:04:43
  Polly Mertens: And then number two is know your patterns.
• 1:04:46
  Polly Mertens: Like I became aware of my patterns thanks to my gene key study.
• 1:04:49
  Polly Mertens: However, you want to, whatever.
• 1:04:50
  Polly Mertens: You just sit with yourself.
• 1:04:51
  Polly Mertens: You know what?
• 1:04:51
  Polly Mertens: You probably, you probably already know it.
• 1:04:53
  Polly Mertens: If you were listening to mine, you're probably like, I got that one.
• 1:04:55
  Polly Mertens: Oh, yeah, I hear, I hear myself and her.
• 1:04:57
  Polly Mertens: So something I may have said gave you that reminder of yours or yours match some of mine, whatever.
• 1:05:03
  Polly Mertens: But like be aware of it, right?
• 1:05:04
  Polly Mertens: And so I've got three that I'm closely monitoring.
• 1:05:06
  Polly Mertens: Let's say where I'm like, yeah, baby, I see you.
• 1:05:09
  Polly Mertens: I see you because you're so frequent.
• 1:05:11
  Polly Mertens: You're so consistently showing up in my life almost every day that I'm gonna just like, I got, I got eyes on you.
• 1:05:18
  Polly Mertens: I got eyes on you, doubt.
• 1:05:20
  Polly Mertens: I got eyes on you, impatience.
• 1:05:22
  Polly Mertens: I got eyes on you comparison.
• 1:05:23
  Polly Mertens: Uh-uh.
• 1:05:24
  Polly Mertens: We're we're not, we're not, we're not living in that shadow anymore.
• 1:05:28
  Polly Mertens: All right, so know your top two to three fear-based defaults.
• 1:05:32
  Polly Mertens: It's not a shame list.
• 1:05:34
  Polly Mertens: This is just like you knowing, like, okay, these are the patterns that I've curated, crafted over my lifetime as survival strategies.
• 1:05:42
  Polly Mertens: You can do some work and then work to get to the bottom of them however you want to, but just being aware of them as we've talked about this.
• 1:05:47
  Polly Mertens: And then maybe, you know, a third step could be picking an anchor question, right?
• 1:05:51
  Polly Mertens: So I just give you the one that Sam gave to me, which is like, what would love do?
• 1:05:55
  Polly Mertens: You know, or could be like, Am I acting from love or fear?
• 1:05:58
  Polly Mertens: Because we're always doing one or the other, right?
• 1:06:00
  Polly Mertens: Love is where our seat of the soul is, and fear is this identity ego self, trying to protect, defend, you know, control something.
• 1:06:09
  Polly Mertens: So just like, what is what is a question that you could ask yourself to guide or choose from your heart, from your soul?
• 1:06:17
  Polly Mertens: And do an experience.
• 1:06:19
  Polly Mertens: Experiment.
• 1:06:19
  Polly Mertens: Like, like I said, I'm in the practice of it.
• 1:06:21
  Polly Mertens: I'm in I'm in an experiment and fucking loving it.
• 1:06:25
  Polly Mertens: So yeah, I just wanted to share all that.
• 1:06:27
  Polly Mertens: Whew, that was a lot.
• 1:06:28
  Polly Mertens: I didn't realize we were going to talk so much about this, but it's been good.
• 1:06:31
  Polly Mertens: I hope this has been helpful for you.
• 1:06:32
  Polly Mertens: And, you know, just know that if you like me, if we if we lose it, like yesterday I had an experience with someone not to be named and they reacted to me, like I could see they got defensive, and then like right away I had a defensive and I like shut that shit down and I was like, oh.
• 1:06:50
  Polly Mertens: So I called them this morning.
• 1:06:51
  Polly Mertens: I was like, yo, I just wanted to say I saw where I was, you know, I saw where I was showing up like that.
• 1:06:57
  Polly Mertens: And let's talk this out.
• 1:06:58
  Polly Mertens: Like I don't want to to have that be out in the space, right?
• 1:07:02
  Polly Mertens: So it's gonna still be there.
• 1:07:03
  Polly Mertens: Like I am pri I'm in the practice, right?
• 1:07:06
  Polly Mertens: And practice doesn't make, you know, permanent perfect practice makes perfect and permanent, but uh imperfect practice, so if I just keep doing that over and over, but I was like, yo, I see it, okay.
• 1:07:17
  Polly Mertens: And I felt it in my body.
• 1:07:19
  Polly Mertens: It was like this, this like wall when I was like defense, and I was like, whoa, look at defense.
• 1:07:25
  Polly Mertens: I still spoke too quickly because it was like this, you know, this is this pattern, this person I have.
• 1:07:29
  Polly Mertens: So anyway, enough about that.
• 1:07:31
  Polly Mertens: So returning to your seat of the soul is the practice, you know, and granted, you know, there's a lot of things we do in our day.
• 1:07:38
  Polly Mertens: I'm not saying this is a 24-7 practice.
• 1:07:41
  Polly Mertens: It's just living from the seat of the soul, I would say, is where the intention lies for me.
• 1:07:47
  Polly Mertens: So that can guide you.
• 1:07:48
  Polly Mertens: It's not a every moment, like, am I in the seat of the soul?
• 1:07:51
  Polly Mertens: Am I in the seat of the soul?
• 1:07:52
  Polly Mertens: It's like just catching yourself, right?
• 1:07:54
  Polly Mertens: Especially in those moments of upset or moments you feel like you're being triggered.
• 1:07:58
  Polly Mertens: So, you know, so I hope, you know, teaching you about those four teachers that we talked about, maybe the different traditions, sharing with you some things that are consistent about them.
• 1:08:07
  Polly Mertens: I hope you have discovered something from Gary Zukoff and the four hindrances.
• 1:08:12
  Polly Mertens: Maybe you'll study that, the jinkeys, Joe Hudson's fabulous, and just start to see like your soul has a frequency, right?
• 1:08:19
  Polly Mertens: And your your essence, your awareness, like you as awareness, it helps you stop performing in the world and start living from the seat of your soul.
• 1:08:28
  Polly Mertens: And I'm still discovering what that means, having my, as Gary Zukov says, the authentic power, the where my personality aligns and is a is a is a vessel for is a is a vehicle for my soul.
• 1:08:40
  Polly Mertens: So stay tuned, may have another follow-up episode uh in a few weeks, a few weeks or a few months.
• 1:08:44
  Polly Mertens: So we'll see.
• 1:08:45
  Polly Mertens: So you know what?
• 1:08:46
  Polly Mertens: Try it for 10 days.
• 1:08:47
  Polly Mertens: Like pick something.
• 1:08:49
  Polly Mertens: If something inspired you about this, like find your your hindrances, maybe what's your number one most go-to hindrance, or maybe look up your gene keys and find which of the shadows, like your like doubt was like super doubt and confusion are like super obvious for me because I had been aware of them before.
• 1:09:06
  Polly Mertens: And so this is just putting them into a framework that I can work with.
• 1:09:10
  Polly Mertens: So that's it for today.
• 1:09:12
  Polly Mertens: And I just wanted to share all that and get into action, yo.
• 1:09:15
  Polly Mertens: Like, like don't have this whole episode land with you and not do something.
• 1:09:20
  Polly Mertens: Like, get out a piece of paper, get on something, take an action, take a step, make a promise to yourself, do something now before you get on to the next video, audio, whatever you're doing.
• 1:09:29
  Polly Mertens: Like, take care of you, man.
• 1:09:31
  Polly Mertens: Like, this matters.
• 1:09:32
  Polly Mertens: This fucking matters.
• 1:09:33
  Polly Mertens: This is such good work.
• 1:09:35
  Polly Mertens: So I wish that for you.
• 1:09:36
  Polly Mertens: I say Namaste.
• 1:09:37
  Polly Mertens: And as we always say here at the Everyday Awesome Project, how your life feels is more important than how it looks.
• 1:09:44
  Polly Mertens: And every day is your opportunity to find your awesome.
• 1:09:48
  Polly Mertens: Cheers, guys.