Latest / Full Spectrum Cycling / Weekly Dose of Fat Radio – Show #54 – Lots of Call-in Guests!

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Weekly Dose of Fat Radio – Show #54 – Lots of Call-in Guests! · Full Spectrum Cycling

• 0:00
  Weekly Dose of Fat, show number 54 for Friday, May 1st, 2015. [gentle music] Let me have your attention for a moment.
• 0:18
  So what are you talking about? You're talking about... Bitching about that sick line you shot. Some son of a bitch don't wanna perhaps. Somebody don't want what you're selling.
• 0:28
  Some broad you're trying to screw and so forth. Let's talk about something important. Are you all here? Most of them. Oh, I'm going anyway. Let's talk about something important. It's The Weekly Dose of Fat.
• 0:40
  Weekly Dose of Fat. It's for closers only. I'm here from downtown. I'm here from Sven and Gomez, and I'm here on a mission of mercy. Welcome to the Weekly Dose of Fat, ladies and gentlemen.
• 0:50
  Across the news desk from me is the one and only Sven Hammer. Hey, everybody. We're joined in the studio by Mr. JK Livington tonight. Yo soy Tortuga. Las Tortugas de las Lamas.
• 1:07
  We'll talk about turtles later in the show. [laughs] Our funky and fresh fat bike radio program is sponsored by the helpful folks at Surly Bikes. Surly makes steel bikes and fat tires that don't suck.
• 1:21
  Check them out at surlybikes.com. Well, what the hell does the show want to prove this week, JK? Well, our engorged docket this week involves- Engorged... [laughs] Engorged.
• 1:35
  Our engorged docket this week involves special guests, count them all: Christie's- One... Ken Lakey Show. Two. Ken, yeah. Colin Ford. Air Ford. Me.
• 1:51
  And Red Fang or ELO or somebody might come in. Mars 5 is six. Iggy and the Stooges might drop by. Right. We delve into craft beer made here in Mecca. Weekly Dose of Fat links from all over the interwebs.
• 2:08
  Jams all over the interwebs. Now into the fabled beer segment. Yeah. Let's sashay right into that puppy with, uh, Oskar Blues Gubna American Double Imperial IPA. [laughs] That's like a mouthful. I know.
• 2:25
  It's like the Imperial God shall bring us an IPA. I've, I read on the interwebs that this beer satisfies Oskar Blues' hankering for an IPA with over 100 IBUs.
• 2:39
  This is what you get- There's no reason for that much bitter, girlfriend. [laughs] Just reminders. You think a- I'll go get the beers. [laughs] You think a man... Oh, hey, it's in the... We're...
• 2:49
  It's warm enough now where we need a cooler. Cooler. This is the first show where we've had to use a cooler in a while. This is a, uh, 10%. Didn't Julio recommend this one? Yeah, this is a julio.com beer.
• 3:02
  Uh, he's always- Hi, Julio... trying to kill us. Why is... Yeah, why is he doing the 10% program all the time [laughs]? Well, but he did send me to a pretty cool, uh, beer and wine store and bar and outdoor patio and...
• 3:17
  Well, it's, uh, Three Cellars. They're in Franklin, Wisconsin. I smell some citrus something. There's supposed to be grapefruit. Well, cheers, boys. Skål say Apricot. [laughs] It's of the- Fruit family.
• 3:32
  [laughs] Pack it in, pack it out. Well- Yep... with the 100 IBU rating I was expecting it to hit me a lot harder than it is. Yeah. That's pretty smooth for being something that's almost lethal. Yeah.
• 3:44
  You guys have definitely changed, man. [laughs] Well- The mutant Gomez version of Gomez- Yeah... moves forth. I'm not what I was. Moves, moves forward every day like a shark of weirdness.
• 3:59
  Well, the, the, the, the, uh, explanation here on the old, uh, beer advocate is that, "The post-fermentation dry hopping with bull tops allows this monstrosity to gently coax the citrus rind and grapefruit aroma while providing a rye malt induced spicy yet round middle [laughs]
• 4:18
  and a brisk clean bitter finish." Oh. 10% ABV. Air, honey. 10%. It does linger in the old, uh, palette there, doesn't it? Get ready for some fun tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Yep. Look out. Gubna Imperial IPA.
• 4:37
  And it's in a can. Yeah, in a can. And- Mm. Mm... endorsed by Darth Julio. [laughs] The Dark Lord- So aside from being, uh- Of the ABVs.
• 4:50
  [laughs] Aside from being recommended by Julio, this week's Beer Buzz is sponsored by Uncle Dick's Bead Slip. Check it out at uncledicksbikeshop.com. Uncle Dick's, a little dab will do you, right on your bead.
• 5:04
  This is kind of a call-in oriented show, isn't it? Yeah. You know, I see on my, uh, on my telly here- I heard it on the rubbery or the bouncing. We've got, we've got a caller. Oh. Should we take a call right away then?
• 5:16
  Right on. Take the call then. Let's take a call. Righty-o. Hola. Who do we have on the line? This is Zach Brown from Alaska. Zach, you crazy bastard, what's up? That's you... That's- Nothing.
• 5:30
  I'm drinking a, you know, a really fine, uh, Steel Reserve. [laughs] It's a pretty high IBU beverage. Steel Reserve. Steel Reserve. Is that a malt liquor? Oh, yeah. Or something. Damn, boy.
• 5:45
  No, that, that's like, that's like the baby malt liquor. Yo, you're going all gangster on us. That's a- You're going all Samoan on us. It says 8.1, so I think that means good.
• 5:54
  [laughs] 8.1, uh, good- On the Richter scale... beer or something. Yeah. You, you drop the decimal point- Yeah... and it's 81%, and that's just fine. [laughs] Perfect. So Zach, my man, so Derek is building- Derek...
• 6:09
  a bike shed. Derek from Psychological out there in Homer, where, you know- Yep... your babies live. And, uh, we, uh, we talked to him out there when I was in Alaska- Yeah... and we were like, you and I sat him down.
• 6:27
  We were having a serious talk about, "Dude, you gotta do some rentals and, and, uh, guide service." And sure enough, now we have the, uh, Psychological- We got it... uh, guide service.
• 6:41
  Homer's very own beach touring company? Full. Yeah, yeah. A- A full-scale, uh, beach rental guide service, the whole nine yards. It was, uh, you know, uh, Juanito's, uh- [laughs]...
• 6:56
  Irish Death, uh, multiple factor, uh, but good logic situation. And, uh, I mean, Gomez knows what's going on and- Are you gonna delve into, uh, the story up there for us? Are you gonna go down and, uh,
• 7:16
  take some pictures, find out what kind of bikes he's renting, get a, you know, sa- Yeah... a sample of his brain tissue, et cetera? I mean, he's got a, he's got a, you know, full fleet of Salsas.
• 7:27
  I know that, and I know he's gonna have to add on a lot more just because the Salsas are always, always rented out.
• 7:35
  But, um, uh, yeah, I'll definitely give a, I'll definitely give a good report on that, and I let him know that you all, you know, need a report, so- Cool. Well, let's work on that together... it's awesome.
• 7:49
  I mean, he lives right down the way. It'll be like a craft project. We can make, we can make like a- What's that? We, it'll be like a craft project. We can make a, uh- Yeah...
• 7:58
  a koozie for our handlebars, and write a story about Homer's Fat Bike Guide Service and Rental. Yeah. So, so dude- Are you gonna- We actually have, we actually have a- This is gonna be Ghostbusters for sure.
• 8:14
  [laughs] Cool. Cool. Sounds great. Well, we're gonna take our next call. Yeah. Thanks for calling, Zach. Good to talk with you. We'll talk again soon. All right, guys. Take care. All right, Zach. Bye. Thanks.
• 8:25
  Welcome to the radio program. Who do we have on the line? Gentlemen, Chris Daisy of Zion Cyclery. Oh, our special guest tonight. Yeah. Chris Daisy.
• 8:33
  I was, I was seeing 2847 area code, so I'm like, "Dude, one of these has gotta be Mr. Chris Daisy." It's the other fib. [laughs] Hey, Chris. Hey, hey, hey. Chris, before we, uh- [laughs]...
• 8:43
  before we get into a conversation with you, we've gotta take a little, uh, ad break here. Okay. And we'll be right back with Mr. Chris Daisy.
• 8:51
  The Dirt Wizard is an aggressive trail goblin traction and control focused invocation that almost any aspiring sorcerer can cast.
• 9:01
  Dirt Wizard tires are available at better bike shops throughout the realm and lands beyond. You are once again listening to Fat Bike Radio. Hey, welcome back to the show. We're on the air with Chris Daisy. Yeah, yeah.
• 9:16
  So dude, Chris is, uh, our- Let's geek out, talk about bikes... yeah, Chris is, for those of you who don't know, is, is our musical maestro that does
• 9:26
  all the music for our show, and he is also- Even when you don't ask for it. Yeah, like- On our anniversary show. [laughs] My bad. Those washes were sweet, dude. I thought they were in there on purpose.
• 9:39
  They just worked real well. I know. That's a good thing then. Yeah, right.
• 9:42
  [laughs] So s- Chris also is a third-generation bike shop owner in Zion, Illinois, right up on the, right, right kinda like, even with me, just on the other side of the border. We were both li- [laughs]...
• 9:56
  living on the DMZ between Illinois and Wisconsin, and- I like to call it almost Wisconsin. Yeah. Yeah.
• 10:02
  And, uh, it's Zion Cyclery, and Zion Cyclery is like, I'm telling you, if you're looking for a fat bike, these guys carry Borealis, Trek, Surly, Salsa, 907, and Felt.
• 10:15
  And I, somehow I'm, I'm thinking that I'm missing a brand that you carry. Did I get them all? Uh, I think you hit them all. Let's see. I, I, I kinda wasn't paying attention. [laughs] That happens a lot when I talk.
• 10:28
  Borealis, Trek, Surly, Salsa, 907, and Felt. Yeah, I think that pretty much covers it. So that is just a crazy, crazy assortment of fat bikes. Every time I go in there I'm like, "Dude, I can't believe..."
• 10:43
  You had a Bucksaw on the floor last time I was in there. Yep. Yep.
• 10:47
  I remember, I remember Chris saying, I don't know if it was on a ride or on our show or something, that he's been having fat bikes so long it's when everybody got along.
• 10:56
  [laughs] Yeah, you know, it's, when you get them when they're small enough companies they can't boss you around, right? [laughs] Not that we don't all get along now. Did you get Trek in there? Yeah, Trek's in there.
• 11:07
  Trek is in there, but, you know, they came late to the party, so they have no say in the matter. [laughs] Right.
• 11:12
  [laughs] Hey, Chris, what do you think of the, the, uh, 27.5 Trek tire that's coming on the Farley this year? On the, on the higher- Oh... on the higher end Farleys anyway? Right.
• 11:23
  Yeah, I mean, I think it's an interesting idea.
• 11:24
  Um, I understand kinda what they're going for which is, uh, you know, if you measure your outside diameter of a five-inch tire, uh, this 27.5 with a four-inch tire is gonna pretty much match that.
• 11:37
  So you're not changing your bike up too much switching from the fatter size to the narrower size.
• 11:43
  And, um, I guess some of the properties that are touted for 29ers, you know, that larger, uh, traction patch, um, the more rolling momen- momentum, um, that's supposed to play some part in this new, uh, wheel size for them.
• 11:58
  So I guess it remains to be seen. Um, you know, it could be- I, I'm excited about it. I, uh, definitely wanna give one a try Sure. Yeah, why not?
• 12:06
  I mean, I, you know, every- everybody, every time you come up with a new standard, the Internet's gonna grumble and everybody's gonna throw a fit, but that's how you progress in the bike industry, and ultimately it leads to better and better products.
• 12:17
  So, you know, you can complain in the short term, but usually the long term it works out for the best. Where do you go for your, uh, complaining internet news? [laughs] 'Cause I'll tell you what- [laughs]
• 12:29
  Where do you not go for complaining internet news? [laughs] Well, it's kind of- Hey, we don't have very much on our site. Well, if we do, we, we- Yeah, we just-... censor the shit out of it... we're the censors.
• 12:37
  We just delete it. Like- [laughs] It's like- Yeah, it smells-... "No, that's your business"... of angst and roses. It's like, "Ah. Air freshener." There, there will be no- Yes-... animosity on our website...
• 12:48
  I know you say. [laughs] Hey, we just have to- But this is actually a really exciting, this is an exciting year, man, for, uh, the bike industry.
• 12:54
  I mean, you know, some, some years you get to where it feels like the only thing that's changing is the paint colors and the decals, but, uh- Mm-hmm... boy, 2016, you almost don't know what to predict.
• 13:03
  I mean, there's, uh- Yeah, you know, there, there was a-... new categories and new stuff popping up everywhere.
• 13:07
  There was a time back there a few years ago where we went to shows and we knew fat biking was gonna be huge, just because of the- Oh, yeah...
• 13:15
  whole fun factor, and, you know, it, it just, it, it took a couple of years, but now we're at a point where it's, it's clipping along really well and it's really dipping into that space between your 29er and the fat bike.
• 13:29
  You know, the plus bike- Well, I think it's gone even further. It's gone further than that. I mean, I think this is the year where you're seeing fat bikes influence the rest of the mountain bike industry. Uh- Sure...
• 13:39
  you know, the fact that you're getting this whole new plus size, I mean- Right... I can't wait to ride a 27.5 plus full suspension bike around local trails. I'm sure the thing is just gonna rip. Yeah.
• 13:50
  I'm look- I'm looking forward to it. Like you need to be any faster. [laughs] [laughs] Yes, as my shins scraped up [laughs] trying to keep up. Yeah. Cool.
• 14:02
  Well, Chris, uh- So did you order, did you get in your, your order of, uh, Dirt Wizards? You know, they were, uh, they came into stock finally.
• 14:10
  Well, the only, the only problem with, uh, Dirt Wizards currently is it's kinda like ordering a bunch of horseshoes without owning a horse.
• 14:17
  I don't have a whole lot of, uh, 29er plus or 27.5 plus bikes on the floor quite yet, um, which means, uh, a lot of people out there in radio listener land probably don't own the bikes yet, so- Right, right, right...
• 14:30
  tires are not quite the huge demand yet. [laughs] Well, that's pretty fortunate that they don't have a whole ton of them to get rid of just yet then. [laughs] Yeah, probably. Cool, man.
• 14:40
  Well, we've got a few other callers sitting in the queue. Do you wanna hang out- Sure... or, uh, you can, uh- Yeah, sure... just hang out for a little bit? We're, uh- Are you in the studio?
• 14:49
  Do you got your guitar slung around your neck? Oh, I would, but, uh, the little ones are sleeping, and, uh- Oh, dear... if I did that, I'm- Don't you have a-... my wife's gonna start screaming my name on the bottom-...
• 14:58
  banjo? [laughs]... of the stairs here, and we, we don't want that. [laughs] A banjo, and you can get Kermit the Froggy. Kermit the Frog here. Or, uh- I could play you some soft acoustic lullabies. That's what I'm saying.
• 15:09
  Strumming. Strumming my bangs with his fingers. A harpsichord. One time, one time. [laughs] A harpsichord or an accordion would be the perfect accompaniment right now. All right.
• 15:21
  We're gonna- Let's hang out and we're gonna take the next caller. Right on. Welcome to the radio program. You've been hanging out very patiently in the queue. Who do we have on the line? This is Noel Kurtz.
• 15:33
  How you doing? Noel, what's up? How's it going, man? How you doing? Uh- It's great. I don't know that it could be any better, actually. Really?
• 15:42
  Noel's my old buddy from, from, we met when, uh, when I lived down by Chicago. Oh. And, uh, Noel is country boy from Iowa. At least he's not from Illinois. Well, all the I states- Actually, I was born in Kankakee...
• 15:58
  is all... Oh, well you escaped. Good on you, man. [laughs] Well, all the I states- Yeah, yeah, what are you gonna do?... including Idaho- You can't control that...
• 16:05
  can just, you know, that's where all the awesome people are born. I'm from Indiana. Well, I was born in Indiana anyway. [laughs] I, I was born in I, California. [laughs] I was born in Wiscons- I and... oh, cripes.
• 16:17
  We're all, we're all 'mericans. Even Mexicans are Americans. It's like Central America or something, I'm told. [laughs] So- We're all Pan-... Noel-... Panjen-...
• 16:25
  Noel, you, you actually have your own private chapter of a fat bike gang there in, uh, Cedar Rapids, I believe, correct? Yes. Yep. Yeah, we- You-... we've got, uh, got one of them here with me, actually. No way.
• 16:41
  Uh, Paul's here with me. We are, uh, we have, have been riding tonight, and now we're in the basement of a lawyer's office who is rumored to be a transvestite, and he made a bar in his basement and a brewery.
• 16:58
  Oh, very nice. And they make fantastic beers, and- Any, any- Yeah, yeah... ball, ball gags or anything down there? [laughs] The gimp box. It's, it's just, uh- Their fake boobies. Uh, just us.
• 17:09
  [laughs] But, uh, you know- Alarmingly, just us... as I promised, as I promised Gary I'd be drinking when I called. Yes?
• 17:18
  So Noel, tell us, tell us, you know, the, this is the, uh, the, the, the sinister group that you actually represent, the seedy underbelly of fat biking there in Cedar Rapids, the Bike Black Ribbon Society of Cedar Rapids.
• 17:31
  Tell us your sinister plot to, uh, I don't know, have fat bike fun or just any kind of fun. How do you guys feel about clunkers and, uh, and coaster brakes and beer? Where do you stand on that?
• 17:46
  I, I, I love coaster brakes. I love clunkers. They're, they're awesome. I mean, they're awesome. But, uh, as far as the sinister plan, man, I don't, I don't know what I'm gonna be doing in an hour, so I- [laughs]...
• 17:58
  I, I don't know. Hey, I'm a member of that club. You know? [laughs] That's good. Way to have, way to avoid- I don't know, man... the government's question at all times.
• 18:06
  I, if I, if I don't have a memory longer than an hour, I certainly can't spill the beans on any of my brethren. Very good. That's for sure. You passed, you passed the first test of Bike Black Ribbon Society, which is-
• 18:17
  Deny everything Don't talk about Bike Black Ribbon Society [laughs] Or don't remember anything. [laughs] There is no Bike Black Ribbon Society. Charlie Mindshit. That was the first rule.
• 18:26
  You know, it's, uh, it's just been, uh, it's been awesome. Other than that, an awesome year to, to ride fat bikes. We got, we got a lot of snow in Iowa this year, a lot, a lot of snow. It was really cold.
• 18:38
  We, we had a great time busting out some, some new paths, you know, doing the old, uh, the old s- snowshoeing, uh, grooming kind of deal. And then, uh, just kinda backyard alley kind of stuff.
• 18:52
  So it's been, it's been great. Killer. Making your own, making your own courses. Yeah, absolutely. Yep. And actually, Cedar Rapids, um,
• 19:01
  I'm sure none of, not a whole lot of people know this, but it's a, it really is a, a venerable fat bike playground.
• 19:08
  There's a lot of places to ride, and it's pretty easy to start at a bar, make a big round loop, make a lot of stops. Oh, you mean, oh, you mean Cedar Rapids is in Iowa [laughs]? Yeah. Or Wisconsin. Yeah.
• 19:21
  Uh, th- those are similar places. Hey, Noel, I'm getting the sign from- I didn't know there was a Cedar Rapids, Wisconsin. [laughs] There is. I'm getting- Bike Pride... I'm getting the sign from the director.
• 19:32
  He's, like, making this, this... [laughs] Now he's holding his crotch and... I, I think we have another caller. So, dude, I love you, but we're going on to the next person. So, um- Okay, man Thanks a lot, Noel...
• 19:44
  shots of Jager for- Take care... the whole, the whole chapter. Oh, wait a sec. Than- thanks a lot. [ice rattling] Top o' the hill, dude. Top o' the hill. Are we taking on another caller while I drink booze, Noel?
• 19:55
  Welcome to the radio program. Gomez has a flask in his mouth. Who do we have on the line? [laughs] Hey, guys. This is Ken and Andy. Oh, Andy's with you? Dude. Yeah. We're doing a conference call right now.
• 20:08
  We're serious about this. Badass. Wow. Let's see, let's see how this fancy technology works. So this is, uh, this is Ken Blakey Schell, our awesome product tester and test pilot, and his amigo, Andy.
• 20:24
  And, uh, they're kinda calling in, and we have a big announcement that we're going to have, uh, we're gonna premiere a new technical fat bike show called Fat Camp. Uh- This is a radio program similar but different.
• 20:42
  Right, right. It's the reciprocal radio program- [laughs]... to the Weekly Dose of Fat. Whereas this is just random blathering- We're the yin to your-...
• 20:50
  for your entertainment We're the ability to bike riders camp Fat Camp. [laughs] Yeah, you guys are the, you guys... We're the yang or ying? I don't know. Here's, here's a pop quiz, guys.
• 20:57
  Are you the ying or are we the yang? [laughs] Yang sounds bigger. Uh-huh. You guys are definitely yangs. [laughs] Ah. Yang, wang, swang. All right. These guys are in. These guys are in. They- Wang... they know.
• 21:09
  So, uh, Ken, why don't you just give us a real quick rundown on what you guys have planned.
• 21:13
  We, uh, Gomez and I have already previewed an idea of your show, and I think it's gonna be something that a lot of people are gonna enjoy. What's, what's your plan?
• 21:22
  Well, I think, I think you heard it in some of the previous callers.
• 21:25
  There's so much cool stuff going on right now that, um, we, we kinda wanna focus on the technical aspect of some of the new technology that's coming out.
• 21:36
  You know, the different ways that people can end up having fun on their fat bike or their plus bike or, you know, whatever. Um, and just try to kinda explain it in a down to earth way and make it so people can g-
• 21:50
  get a little bit more sort of a clue about what's coming out there and understand how it fits into whatever their quiver currently is. Right on.
• 21:56
  So you guys are planning on doing basically a monthly show covering technical fat bike topics. Have we dec- Gomez, have we decided when we're actually gonna allow people to hear Ken and Andy's fantastic radio show?
• 22:09
  I did, uh, I did talk it over with Ken, and I think we agreed that Saturday mornings once a month, but I don't know which Saturday, whether it's gonna be the first, middle. Yeah. What do you guys think about that, Ken?
• 22:20
  Yeah, let's, let's figure out a, a, like, first or second Saturday of the month, and then that'll give people an idea when they can expect to hear more radio goodness from Ken and Andy. Yeah.
• 22:31
  That, that sounds great to us. Um, we're really stoked about the program. There's just so much good stuff going on that, uh, it's, it's a, kinda an exciting time to end up talking about bike tech right now.
• 22:43
  Well, killer, man. So what's the, what's the subject of your first show gonna be? Um, we ended up doing a pilot show, which you guys ended up listening to, which, um, I'm not sure what the exact plan is.
• 22:56
  That might get released. Uh, that, that was really about converting your fat bike over for summer use. Um, that might end up being in a 26er setup where you're doing a, you know, 26x4 inch.
• 23:07
  Might be, you know, a 27+ setup. Might be 29 plus, uh, setup. Um, for the, the next show, we were talking about, and this is gonna sound like the driest subject in the entire world. Wait, wait. [laughs] Wait, wait.
• 23:25
  Wait for- So we've been- Wait for it, radio people... we've been talking, we've been talking moist all day. [laughs] Our show's very moist. Moist. So, so tell us what it is. So- Tell us what it is, Ken and Andy...
• 23:35
  we, we were gonna end up getting into, uh, some of the, the how bit things, 'cause we've got...
• 23:40
  You know, there's, there's a lot of new things coming out there with this, this whole boost, the 148 and all that kind of stuff. You know, the fat bike world has already seen, you know, I think a switch from 170 to 148.
• 23:52
  Mm. And the rest of the bike world is kinda finally starting to end up seeing the light and doing the same thing. They're going from, you know, the 135, 142 up to this boost stuff. Killer.
• 24:03
  I would love- So we wanted to- I would love to learn about... I, I actually- Me too... wanna ride a boost bike. I'm totally ignorant about this. Yeah.
• 24:09
  I'm gonna listen to Ken's show because all these different standards, if, if he can- Right... cut through the chafe and actually make sense of it, I'm in. Yeah. Yeah, if you keep it wider, it's boostier [laughs]
• 24:20
  A boostie. Oh, I like the sound of that. A boostie. Oh, we got Mr. Chris Daisy just putting in a little bit of comment right there. [laughs] Boost. Oh, yeah. Boost. Color, color commentary. Yeah. Hey, thanks, Chris.
• 24:32
  Boost.
• 24:33
  [laughs] That's the thing, guys, is that Ke- Ken's really good at, uh, he, he understands the tech, and, uh, sometimes it's way, way ahead of man, and so that's, that's where I need him to explain that stuff, and he does a really good job just, just watering it down and, and seeing how I can take advantage of that stuff.
• 24:51
  Right. And, and- He, he keeps me honest... and just listening to the pilot, you, you put in some levity to the program and- Yeah... help keep it on track. And Andy, I think you're, uh, you're right up there- Yeah...
• 25:00
  with the, uh, the best of the best. It's the click and clack of, of- [laughs]... Fatbike Tech. Fat Camp, once a month here on Fat Bike Radio, www.fat-bike.com. See, I just did a little promo for you guys. Right.
• 25:16
  You know what? You, speaking of promos, we've got this contest going, and we have three quarters of a promo from Dave and a couple of others, but man, we got some great prizes.
• 25:24
  People should really go ahead- I can fill in the other quarter part- Yeah... 'cause I heard part of it.
• 25:28
  [laughs] Call in, call in and, and, and leave us a, leave us a voicemail with a radio promo that goes something like this, "Hi, I'm looking at a lighthouse, but when I'm not looking at a lighthouse, I'm, uh, kind of staring at the clouds and, uh, listening to Sven and Gomez on Fat Bike Radio."
• 25:42
  That's a pretty good one. And if you do- That's better than, than Puck's- [laughs]... two-thirds one. If, if you do that, we will enter you to win a c- I'm looking at the thing right now. It's sitting right over there.
• 25:52
  I know, there's a carbon framed- A carbon framed-... Alaskan... Alaskan fat bike frame. And, uh- And I see the tires...
• 25:58
  for, for the, for loser number one, there is a set of, uh, Minnesota fat bike tires, and, uh, for loser number two, there's a set of- Stakes... stakes. So, so- So Ken, you've actually ridden- Fourth place...
• 26:13
  just about- You're fired. [laughs] You're fired. Actually, we, we, we, we, we're not gonna fire anybody. Um [laughs] All right. Well, speak for yourself. [laughs] I, I, I will. Uh-oh. I'm in character, damn it.
• 26:24
  So Ken, Ken, Ken, that's about the only tire that, uh, you have not ridden is the, uh, framed Minnesotan. 4.0. Sweet ass tire. I enjoyed them when I rode them. What are you riding right now on your fatty?
• 26:41
  Uh, right now I got my beach setup going, so I'm running the, the Flow Beast on the front and the, uh, Snowshoe XL on the rear. Oh, really? Very cool. That's a lot of knob for the beach, my friends. Knob.
• 26:53
  [laughs] So- Hey, speaking of, speaking of knobs, we got another caller on the line, and, uh, I got a kind of an idea that we can get some conditions about the old Michigan shoreline- Oh, killer... on there.
• 27:05
  Guys, welcome to the, uh, fat- Hold, hold on... bike.com family. We're gonna drop you all off, and we're gonna, uh, try and get, uh, Nate Phelps on the line here. Hey, how's it going? Nate, welcome to the show.
• 27:17
  I'm gonna leave the other guys listening if they- Yeah... wanna hang out 'cause Ken and- All right... Ken and Chris are just gonna kinda cruise in the background for a little bit. All right, sounds good.
• 27:23
  But, uh, Nate, welcome to the show. Hey, thanks for inviting me. So Nate- Did, did, did Gomez have to pay you to be on the show? Uh, just begged and pleaded.
• 27:32
  [laughs] Hey, I owe you a long, lingering, uncomfortable man hug next time we, uh, next time we cross paths. You should run away very quickly. I'm running away. [laughs] So my man- Uh...
• 27:46
  you know, over here in Skåne land, we are running out of beach. Yep. The water levels- [laughs]... and the wind is just blowing out our beaches. How are things looking over there Michigamme side?
• 27:58
  You know, water is high, and, uh- And so am I. [laughs]... it's tricky to get around some of the structure around, you know, it's stuck up the water.
• 28:06
  We rode Sunday, uh, Grand Haven to Muskegon, and, um- Done that ride... felt like we were in the wind- Yeah... both directions, but, uh- [laughs]... you know, the beach is kind of disappearing. Wow.
• 28:16
  We did that ride, what? A year and a half ago, two, uh, a year and a half ago- Yeah, we-...
• 28:20
  late summer, and there was a ton of beach, but the lake is, like, two and a half feet higher now, so that, that affected that stretch, taking our lovely sand and putting it under the water. Wait, is the pirate bar okay?
• 28:32
  [laughs] There's a pirate bar there, and it's awesome. Oh, I've been to Grand Haven. Yar. [laughs] The sinking sands- Yar...
• 28:39
  of Grand Haven are the home to some of the best fat bike beach riding in all of the Great Lakes. Yar, soy tortuga. Arr, tortuga. [laughs] Cool.
• 28:52
  So, uh, Nate, you guys, uh, you went from Grand Haven north to Muskegon, right? Uh, no. I'm sorry. We went from Holland north to Grand Haven. Oh, Holland north to Grand Haven. Oh, okay. Okay. Roger that. Right on. Yeah.
• 29:04
  And then what's south of there? There's another... I mean, it was a pretty good ride south of Grand Haven to Port something or other. Port Sheldon. Yeah, yeah. Right. That was it. For sure. Right on.
• 29:13
  You know what you're talking about. Yes. It, it's about a 10-mile stretch- Yeah... nine-mile stretch, something like that, right? Yeah, yeah. How's that looking down there?
• 29:20
  A little more, um, it doesn't have, like, the whole sand, you know, it's not like the sand dunes.
• 29:26
  The sand dunes are close to the water there, and it's got enough, so the beach is still pretty intact there, but it gets... Water is just overall, yeah, it's a lot higher.
• 29:35
  Even going farther north, uh, even last year we noticed, um- Well, that's why we're-... going north out of Mi-... we're recommending that all- Yeah... everyone in Illinois water their grass all the time.
• 29:46
  [laughs] That's what he said. Hey, hey. Yeah, hey, maybe- [laughs]... maybe, maybe selling water to California is not that bad an idea. Right.
• 29:51
  We just need to, we just need to roll off some of that- Just about two feet... just- Drop her down...
• 29:56
  I don't know if this holds any, uh, any, any scientific truth, but I was told because it froze across and all the snow landed on there, that we didn't have a great deal of evaporation. True, true.
• 30:07
  And, uh- True, you speak the truth. Man, you're kinda intimidated over there. [laughs] Freaking me out, man. Yeah. I'm not a scientist. No. I just play one on TV. [laughs] Yeah. I slept at Holiday Inn last night.
• 30:18
  [laughs] I did neither of those things, but I'm sleeping in a hammock tent tonight. What about Murphy? With a Murphy. Mick Murphy, please Oh, yeah.
• 30:26
  We got a Murphy bed in the studio here if you ever wanna just kinda crash on that thing. [laughs] God knows, God knows the ghosts, the, the, [laughs] the- That's like a-... the cardinal knowledge that has...
• 30:37
  [laughs] Yeah. I, I think it's- It, it-... been slept in, like, twice since we moved in Oh, I know. There's not even, like, a Prima Nocte on that one, so. It's super sweet. Sweet. Yeah. Uh, all right.
• 30:48
  So, Nate- We have guests on the line. [laughs] We're, we're ruminating- Be decent, people. [laughs] Hey, we are- Play like a professional.
• 30:57
  [laughs] So, so we are planning on coming over there at some point, maybe doing the ferry over trip again, 'cause from Milwaukee that works out super sweet. I don't even have to use a car. I can- Yep...
• 31:06
  drive to the ferry, jump on the ferry, go over there, ride fat bikes for three days, and- And Nate, come up to Manistee-... come right on back... and we'll- Right on back...
• 31:13
  we'll ride bikes, and then paddle boats, and then- Paddle asses. [laughs] And then [laughs] ride bikes some more. [laughs] Without the paddling of the asses. Oh, sorry. [laughs] Only if Sven comes maybe. I don't know.
• 31:28
  Is this 10% ABV? You- Right? Who's a whosees. Yeah, I'm only into one of these and I'm like, "Ah, I got slurin' words." Have you had a beer, Nate? Can you, can you do your Foster Brooks impression, please?
• 31:42
  [laughs] Top of the hill, beer stop. Well- Have we run over our guest? [laughs]... we got a couple of things going on you guys might be interested in. Okay.
• 31:50
  Well- Um, kind of come, come on over on, in June, on, on June 20 and 21st we're gonna be doing s- a little backpacking trip up the lake, and then we'll do another one in August 18th and 19th. Really? Yeah.
• 32:02
  Starting, starting where and heading to where? We're doing a little bit of reconnaissance, 'cause, uh, we think we're gonna make this one kind of fun.
• 32:11
  But it's kind of been, uh, I haven't done much south of Highland, so we're kinda thinking we're gonna head towards the Saugatuck area. Yeah. Oh. Um- Yeah, Saugatuck to New Buffalo-... and go probably-...
• 32:21
  could be a nice three-day thing. There's some... I, I, I kinda know that- Yeah... I kinda know that area a little bit. So- So I've kind of put it all together. Yeah, that's kind of the dates we're kind of populating.
• 32:34
  But you know, it's always cool going out in Muskegon, for sure, because it's just so accessible. True that.
• 32:39
  Well, you know, shoot us a, shoot us a note to, uh, gomez@fat-bike.com and let him know what those dates are, and we'll, you know, let people know about it, 'cause I, I think there's a lot of great- Yeah...
• 32:50
  riding over there. That's for sure. Yeah, for sure. I like... And then there's, we got some things going on with a couple other shops.
• 32:57
  Uh, I own Central District in Grand Rapids, a shop in Muskegon called City Hub, and then there's a Third Coast bike shop in Hudsonville, and we're getting together and we're doing some ladies fat bike beach rides.
• 33:09
  Oh, cool. Awesome. Um, the first one is June 6th, going out of, out of Muskegon, going north. Um, and that'll hit your, uh, fatbike.com calendar here shortly. Right on, man. Killer.
• 33:21
  So are those gonna be called bikini beach rides? Because that's what I would call them. You know it. [laughs] That's, that's just something- Only if you wear one, Gomez. Right? [laughs] I need to wear one.
• 33:34
  [laughs] Yeah, you know, he is wearing one. [laughs] Oh, my eyes. Terrifying. Ah. [laughs] The, the, the third eye just saw that. [laughs] The goggles. Boo-boo. [laughs] Oof. All right.
• 33:47
  See, they had to make- I don't know if there's any goggles strong enough for that... they had to, they had to make our show icky. [laughs] You, you, you started this. What? What? No. Wasn't me. I wasn't even here.
• 34:00
  All right, Nate. Nate, you are a cool dude. You keep on doing what you're doing, man. And Nate is also the secret, you know, head of the Bike Black Ribbon Society of Grand Rapids. Shh, shh, shh.
• 34:12
  A lot of people don't know that. Shh. And also, a huge trail advocate. He juggles. He does hot yoga. God knows what else. [laughs] I'm just making shit up. Dances. I'm just making shit up now, Nate.
• 34:24
  You dancing for nickels? Dancing for nickels? Dancing for nickels? No. D- dancing for nickels? That's you, JK. Thanks for being on the show, Nate. What are you, kickass. You kickass.
• 34:30
  The hot yoga- Thanks for inviting me... the hot yoga is moist. [laughs] Thanks, Nate. We'll talk to you soon, man. All right. Yeah, yeah, man. You're tuned to Fat Bike Radio. Will Ross?
• 34:46
  Will Ross listens to Fat Bike Radio. Here's Sven and Gomez with your weekly dose of fat. And now for something completely different, links from across the web. We have some, we have a couple this...
• 34:57
  It's, you know, it's that time of year when I think this is where the plus bike thing's really gonna help out, because fat bike stuff kinda starts to, "Those things are only for snow, blah, blah, blah."
• 35:09
  Well, you know the whole beach- Nice snow riding... and beach adventures and et cetera, et cetera, are the thing that a lot of people are, you know, missing out on.
• 35:19
  But I, do you think that, you know, fat biking is kinda hot in the Midwest because of- Kinda. You know where it's really hot? It's hot. Chris, tell us how hot it is down in Zion, Illinois, man.
• 35:30
  [laughs] Speak directly into the flower. It's, it's us in Anchorage, baby. Yeah, man. They got beaches all around Alaska. It's super beachy. We're talking about Zion, Illinois, though. Yeah, that's right.
• 35:45
  They have it all around it. 23 different kinds there. It's surrounding Zion, apparently. You know- [laughs]... I wanna go, I wanna go and take black and white pictures of beach riding in the steel mills of Gary, man.
• 35:57
  Yeah, man. I think that'd be sweet. That sounded so- That's, doesn't that sound like a lot better use of our day than fucking making assembly animations of fat bike hitch racks?
• 36:10
  By the way, we're doing a big hitch rack blowout, shootout. It's the Yakima Kid versus the Kuat- Queen. [laughs] King. Yeah. I like to call it Let's Get Hitched. Let's Get Hitched.
• 36:28
  Saris or- [laughs] Why does, why does Michael have a lighter? [laughs]... the Dark Lord Saris versus- One Up USA. Oh. God, it does sound like, like American Gladiators. Yeah. [laughs] I mean, that show was awesome.
• 36:41
  I liked, I liked Tower. That guy was cool. Chris, Chris, did you have a favorite American Gladiator? [laughs] Uh, oh gosh. Oh, do not answer that question. I'm trying to remember their names.
• 36:54
  Uh, I, I've immediately saw two episodes, so I can't really comment. Well, I, I can only remember that I believe- Zap... I believe Tower- What was the, the Zap? Yeah, Zap. Yep. Zap with the ugh.
• 37:01
  But I think Tower was like- [laughs] Tower was like from the sea. He was, he was the, he was the kill. So- Wow... it was somebody was from- That makes all the difference... our local area.
• 37:08
  It's like, "Yeah, I'm a Tower over here." You're starting to give me an idea for my next fat bike event, though. [laughs] Incorporating a- Tennis ball guns? More severe obstacles, I think. Pneumatic tennis ball guns.
• 37:20
  Yeah, those are pretty sweet. You'd have to- Yeah... obstacle course through- You know, uh-... with a joust... maybe it's the, uh, it's the, uh, uh, water balloon sling shots at the beach because those are pretty sweet.
• 37:30
  Yeah, beach, beach jousting through a barrage of, uh- Ugh, water balloon slingshots... water balloons. Yeah, buddy. I like it. Well, see that, that sounds like- I've heard there's a-... Gnomefest...
• 37:41
  I've heard there's snipers on top of a decommissioned power plant- Oh, nice... so maybe whoever can make it across the, uh, beach in front of the- [laughs]... old nuclear plant without getting shot wins.
• 37:50
  [laughs] I'll do it. You know, speaking of something that would look good in black and white. [laughs] A power plant. [laughs] Yeah, there you go. Yeah, yeah. I hear what you're saying. All right.
• 38:00
  You know, it's times like these that I'm reminded of the smooth ride of a Surly steel frame, riding rubber tires- On-... talking on the radio about it. Thanks.
• 38:15
  [laughs] Thanks again to Surly for sponsoring the radio portion of today's broadcast. Thanks to our special guests, Chris Daisy, um- You're welcome... oh. Mr., Mr. Nate Phelps. Nate Phelps, indeed.
• 38:31
  Uh, we had- Ken and Andy doing their, uh- Yeah... promo for their new- I know... podcast- We had the-... on our Fat Bike Radio Network. Indeed.
• 38:41
  Uh, we had Zach Brown, fresh from Anchorage, and, uh- And Noel from- Noel from-... Ahuija. Yeah, from Ahuija, man. So it's been a full show. We bid you adieu. Uh, that was really weird that I said that.
• 38:56
  Uh, we- What are you wrapping around your hand? Is that a rubber band? [laughs] What the hell are you doing, boy? Oh, yeah. He's trying to cut the circulation off. It's autoerotic- [laughs]... finger asphyxiation.
• 39:07
  I think it's, I, I, I think, I think it's my IV. [laughs] All right, man. Chris, you got any final words for the show? Uh, you guys are awesome. Stay awesome. Everybody stay awesome. Yeah, thanks.
• 39:20
  Hey, thanks for hanging out for the whole entire program. That was very nice of you. Thanks for having me. And, uh, if you haven't been to Zion Cyclery, I'd recommend stopping in and- Please...
• 39:30
  and giving Chris a big, uh, just, uh, a handshake. I'm not gonna go for that man hug business. [laughs] Not until we're in person. I, I can handle man hugs. [laughs] It's all right. Bring bacon.
• 39:41
  Beer or bacon or soft drinks. You bet. Bacon... the cowboy store. Woo. Bye, Chris. Later. Who else is lurking on the line? There's more?
• 39:57
  [laughs] Hey, what, we're not done yet? I was at the end of my page. [laughs] I'm done. I'm done. Oh, fuck this stuff. We're not even gonna, we're not even doing links this week. But, oh, we talked about the leagues.
• 40:11
  Oh, did we? Yeah. Oh. How about, how, how about we- How about the weekly dose of- Somebody just barks in the background... yeah, how about, how about- How about the weekly- Yeah... dose of fat?
• 40:19
  We, you know who's, you know who's still hanging out? Zach. Oh, Zach's still here. Zach, Zach is still here. Zach Attack. What's up, Zach? My kid was, my kid was excited to say hi as well.
• 40:28
  [laughs] I don't know if you got him. [laughs] Hey, baby. How are you? Are you having- You hear that? Surly is awesome, daddy. She said Surly is awesome. Oh, very good. [laughs] Those are the words. Teach me on.
• 40:45
  All right, man. Surly's awesome. Hey, thanks very much. You should do a radio promo. You might win a, an Alaskan framed carbon fat bike frame. Duh. Call 818- We got, we, we got one in the works. We got one in the works.
• 40:58
  Right on. Nice. All right, kids. Okay, 818-918- All right... B-I-K-E. Kids can win it. Kids can win it. Yeah. For sure. Sorry I always hang out too long, but it's too fun just to keep listening.
• 41:09
  [laughs] That's- All right... all right. You're the man, dude. Yeah. Uh, we got another caller, so- All right. All right, we're gonna pop somebody else on, man. All right. See you guys. Peace out. Well- Hello...
• 41:19
  welcome to the radio program. This is- Who's this? Who's this man? Ernesto. Ernesto. Ernesto. How are you all doing? Ernesto. Hey, what's up, my man? What do you know? Oh, nothing.
• 41:32
  I just got done, I just got done hunting wolverines with my fat bike. No way. Way. Yeah, way, you know. Uh, wolverines- Was it, you sure it was a wolverine?
• 41:42
  Because, you know, down there, down there on the, uh, in the forest preserves, there's a lot of, uh, raccoons that are- Other X-Men... impersonating- Oh... wolverines... another X-Man you are fighting.
• 41:52
  [laughs] You know, they, they put on the wolverine's clothing, and then they just, they rule, they rule the, they rule the block. Beer, everyone? No, do you know what they do? What? Do you know what they do?
• 42:06
  They wear spoons on their knuckles, and they wear wolverine masks. Oh, spoons. [laughs] Hey, I'm good with the beer, JK. I got a cold one right here. Oh, I could actually use one. Anyway, what do I have to do-
• 42:19
  What do you have- What do I have to do to win an Alaskan frame made out of walrus? Um- Everything is awesome... well, if by walrus you mean carbon fiber, then all you have to do is- No, I'm talking like, like-
• 42:32
  Walrus skin... I'm, I'm talking like walrus the animal. Uh, I was just listening to Gomez say, "I am the walrus." I am the walrus. So you need to skin Gomez- [laughs]...
• 42:42
  and, and then you will be able to make a friend- That's a whole lot of skinning, man. [laughs] And screaming for that. [laughs] He brings me a 10% beer. Thank you. 10 50, thank you. 10 50. [laughs] Thank you.
• 42:53
  Uh, speaking of Gomez- Anyway... he has a spicy, uh, round middle, so I think you can get a lot of [laughs]... A lot of skin. [laughs] I mean- Right... I mean, you could probably make a shawl.
• 43:03
  [laughs] I'm gonna give you, next time I see you all, I'm gonna give you a high five, but my hands are gonna be full of Nutella. Is that okay? Yeah. It'll be a brand new jar of Nutella. [laughs] Write that down.
• 43:12
  Then we can all lick each other's fingers. Sterile Nutella? Mm. Nothing like it. Yes. Is there a website for that yet? Mm. Sterilenutella.com. I think I'm, I think I'm just gonna start making one right now. Yeah.
• 43:25
  G- you know what? We were in, uh,
• 43:27
  a- at Seattle Classic, we were in a meeting, and, uh, this thing with the Plus bikes being such a big deal out there, it's like, uh, one of the guys said, "Yeah, you should get doplusbikes.com."
• 43:37
  I'm like, "I wonder if that's available." And guess what? Five minutes later, guess what we own? Plusbikes.com. Plusbikes.com. Awesome. So now Nutella, sterilenutella.com, I think that might be available.
• 43:48
  And you know what, Ernesto? You know what? Maybe Tesla- I think we need a, uh-... maybe Tesla bike bikers are available... we need a celebrity spokesmagel- model for plusbikes.com.
• 43:57
  I think you might be the bilingual- [laughs] Uh, I don't know. What, what do you say? Come on. Be a cartoon character. Let's do it. I'll start the website, I'll start the website with some construction paper and tape.
• 44:11
  [laughs] Website has already been started- And then I-... so we're, we- And then I'll scan-... we'll take your construction paper and tape, and we'll m- And make it into corn! We'll [laughs] And then I'll scan it.
• 44:23
  What did I tell you? [laughs] And we'll match that with pipe cleaners and paper clips. I like paper clips. Yeah, don't forget the glitter. And maybe popsicle sticks. Stripper glitter? Ooh, stripper glitter. Yeah.
• 44:34
  And maybe some metal from Michael's. Is there any other kind? I don't know. So Neto, these days you're- So-... you're riding a single speed Puglsley in all of its purple, sparkly awesomeness. Yes.
• 44:45
  And, uh- My bike is under rehab... and you traded that for, like, a bag of Skittles straight up, and your Moonlander for that, for that f- to your, uh, to your cousin, or was it your brother? My roller brother. Oh. Yeah.
• 45:02
  And how's he l- how's he rocking the Moonlander? So there you go. Does he like that? He, he's not riding it. Ugh. Oh. He's, he's busy being a real estate guy. He just wanted- What, does he have a corporate job?
• 45:12
  It's fricking Sparkle, man. It's, he- Yeah... so Sparkle is, like, retired? Yeah. Semi-retired? Yeah. We, we don't talk about that. We don't talk about that stuff. #savesparkle. Save Sparkle. #braphthemoist.
• 45:25
  Everything we're talking about [laughs] #braphthemoist. #ernestosbrothersfatbikeissad. [laughs] Yes. Yeah. But he does have Red Rock Canyon nearby, so he can take it over there.
• 45:41
  Well- Be headed... on special occasions. Like some- Yeah... somewhere around December 1st, or 1st to the 10th, I think is, uh, Sparkle's birthday somewhere. [laughs] Sparkle's birthday festival of love.
• 45:58
  You're getting really glassy-eyed. [laughs] You're tearing up, aren't you? So, so Ernesto, yeah- You guys roofied my beer, didn't you? [laughs] That was- No! That was Julio. That was Julio with the 10- 10%. Ernesto.
• 46:13
  [laughs] Okay, misters. I have to finish up my taxidermy. All right. See you later. All right. Say hi to the wal- say hi to the walrus for us. I will. Thank you. Buenos noches. Bye-bye, sir. Bye-bye. Arrivederci,
• 46:31
  America. Bon journo. Now we're done? [laughs] I don't know. No, we have to do the little- Beach ride, the Rip Cap. No, we don't- what? We didn't do that. We glossed right over that.
• 46:44
  [laughs] I think we talked about some links. We didn't talk- Um-... about our damn p- oh, well. We didn't talk about the beach ride. We didn't talk- Oh. Welcome back to the radio program, ladies and gentlemen.
• 46:57
  [laughs] Yeah, you were You laugh- Well done... you laugh, you laugh, you laugh, but welcome back to the radio program. Here's Sven with True Confessions of a Fat Bike [laughs] Beach Ride.
• 47:11
  I, I just got so enthralled with our callers. We still have two- Yeah... two hanging out on the line. No way. Way.
• 47:18
  Still have- Yeah, this is delirious I just finished my whiskey and I'm trying to figure out what's going on. [laughs] Chris, Chris has whiskey and Zach still has Steel Reserve, I think. I need- So-...
• 47:28
  I need, I need my fucking whiskey. [laughs] Where is your damn whiskey, everybody? I need, I need, I need... Dave, you broke into those Sculpins. I need my damn whiskey. You, you gave... Oh, uh, oh.
• 47:38
  [tsks] Remember when we had good shows? I know. This is one of them. [laughs] Maybe. So Chris, any final words from the finally final we finalized before? [laughs] Hey, wait a second. Wait, wait, wait one second. Oh.
• 47:55
  Wait, stop everybody. All right, we're gonna talk about the beach ride. Mm-hmm. We can't talk about the beach ride without talking about Michael's turtle impression, so let's start right there.
• 48:06
  Michael, you played turtle. What happened? Kind of near the beginning of the- Yeah... yeah, right? Mostly within, like, the first 500 yards of the beginning of the ride. Or 200. [laughs] Or two.
• 48:15
  [laughs] No, there, just this point, there was this nice little babbling brook thing coming, and I looked and, eh, just kinda got highway hypnosis or something. And- Look at the pretty colors... it was, yeah.
• 48:30
  I mean, hey, you wanna... I mean, granted, the wind was kicking roughly. It was not- It was a-... working out-... energetic ride... really well at first
• 48:40
  And I just needed a moment of pause, and I looked for my moment of pause, and I chose the wrong place. And it was like quicksand, so the entire body just toppled to the left
• 48:53
  into that babbling brook [laughs] That I was so admiring. And there's me, bag ass, in there like a turtle, running back and forth, bike on top of me. Yeah, I think Kim was, had the best, uh, view of it.
• 49:08
  Yeah, vantage point. She's- Now, how, how many beers did you have in your backpack while you were submerged in that stream? To, to weigh you down. It was, like, right at the beginning of the ride, so.
• 49:17
  I think it was seven. [laughs] It was six or seven. I, I, I- Six or seven. Awesome. Yeah, 'cause I, I drank one to lessen the pack. [laughs] Just out of- Like, "Well, this pack is heavy"...
• 49:28
  anticipation of something else. Or maybe you were waiting for Zito and I to show up- Anticip- Patience... patience. Ugh. No. It was, it, it, it was- I'm going, I'm going all Rocky Horror on you here. It was good.
• 49:40
  It was... [laughs] Yeah. Anticipation. [laughs] Patient. Oh, sorry. Continue, continue with your reenactment of the turtle impression. Well, yeah. And then I just learned, flailing back and forth like a turtle would.
• 49:56
  [laughs] Well, truth be told, there was a- But it was good... there was a solid three hours of, uh, being wet for JK on that ride. Yeah. It was an incredible... What was it, like a seven- Pre-hypothermic...
• 50:07
  seven, 7.8 miles of beach riding that it was just... Oh, it was, was glorious. It was a, was a, was definitely, uh, the best time of America. It was a very wet time for Michael.
• 50:20
  [laughs] At the end, I was just like, "Ah, screw it. I'll just ride even though I, know I'm gonna get swamped." I'm like, "Well, all right." Well, we're on our way back anyway. Right.
• 50:29
  We had such a horrible, well, you know, like a 15 to- An adventurous... 15 to 20 mile an hour headwind out. Call that adventure. And then- Yeah... on the way back was just like, brat, metal ring. Yep.
• 50:44
  [blows raspberry] I know. I, I, I, I, I- Just crashing through it, over everything. Well, yeah, no, it's just jumping into the damn lake, and I'm just going like, "I don't care." Yeah, right into the water.
• 50:53
  It's like, it's like, I'm, it's like, it's not that I'm not wet. [laughs] It's just amazing. I've been wet the entire damn time, so hey, all right. I'll go, you know, ass deep. Brp, brp, brp, brp.
• 51:04
  I recently just tore my derailleur hanger off and put a new one on there, and it's- Thanks to Mr. Jim Huber of Schlick Cycles for- Yeah... straightening that shit out for you. He's aligning it, aligning that right now.
• 51:14
  Yeah, he is. That's not what he's doing, though. [laughs] He's doing something with a goat. With a goat. Uh-oh. Maybe. Maybe. Saying some, uh, evil, evil, uh, words over my bike. Incantations.
• 51:28
  You can just blow through all this willow and shit on those bikes [laughs] on the beach and just like, it just blows through there. I would... That's why I ride in the water, so I don't have to take out any vegetation.
• 51:40
  Well, there was some of that, and there was some of this, and there was some [laughs] of the other thing. I, I, I, I- So-... you know, it doesn't-... I, I need to get back there to- Yeah...
• 51:48
  find my socks because- [laughs] Well, well, my bag- I, I, I totally love the whole- Well, well, my bag-... Star Trek thing dude. Yeah...
• 51:55
  well, while my bag was sitting there flailing, or I was flailing, my bag was just taking water on. And most things are all right. The her had some socks. Yes. That worked out. Yes, it did. And clothes.
• 52:11
  [laughs] And clothes. I, I have a picture of your socks at the turnaround point of the ride. Yeah. I think they're still there. That's why- Are they?... it's like Star Trek in, bringing back the soundtrack.
• 52:19
  Well, nobody's, nobody's there anyway. We should just go grab them. Star Trek III. Spock's socks. The Search for Str- Spock. [laughs] The Search for Socks. [laughs] See? It works. I tell you, I tell you it works.
• 52:30
  Tell you, this is the kind of intellectual humor [laughs] that Fat Bike Radio brings you. They'll bring it back. It'll- Oh... bring them all back, I tell you. 10%, ladies and gentlemen. What? We're at? 10%. 10% ABVs.
• 52:44
  They got, they got a- And then I went to what the hell is this? No... mixing board 'cause we got going there. Yeah. [laughs] Jesus. Ugh. I can't do this in real time. Oh, 7%. I'm getting compressors for you people.
• 52:55
  Thank you. Thank you. I, I need to be compressed. [laughs] Or something. Chris knows all about compressors. Probably. Chris. Yeah. If you guys have any, uh, vocal effects, now would be the time to use them.
• 53:07
  Well, uh, JK and I are- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah... JK and I are rocking the DBX286S, thank you very much, but Gomez is completely unfettered, so [laughs] So take that, people.
• 53:17
  Next week- This is Gomez raw in your ears. Yeah. Next week, Gomez will be processed. I'm, she, you know, fucking your ear holes. [laughs] Well, I wouldn't go that far. No?
• 53:27
  Well, I might be teasing your ear hole, you know. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, we've come to the end of our hour. Well.
• 53:34
  And I hope it's been worth it to you as much as it has been to us, because this has been Nonlinear Radio at its finest. Indeed. Thanks for shopping at fatbike.com. And if you think I'm editing this shit, you're crazy.
• 53:46
  [laughs] [laughs] Yeah, this goes out, zero. Yeah. There were some pretty- Safety net... there were some pretty harsh spots, but- Harsh... you know, we got through it Whatever... in the end. Maybe.
• 53:56
  Just means I have to listen to it 78 times. [laughs] It'll sound really good. It's like getting the Agil all up in your back. Ah! [laughs] Wow. That was amazing. And we're out. [laughs] Hey, thanks guys.
• 54:14
  We'll talk to you, uh, next week maybe, if you can suffer through it again. So we're done now? [laughs] All right, Zach and Chris, thanks for, uh, hanging out the whole show. You guys are stead- Stayin' good...
• 54:25
  steadfast. Ay, ay, ay. Yo, thanks for having me. [laughs] I like the hanging. Call next week. We'll, we'll s- we'll torture your ear holes again. With, with- JK, I'm a trooper. Right on, man. All right, Zach.
• 54:41
  Bye bye, guys. Later, boys. You've been listening to Fat Bike Radio's weekly dose of fat. Find us on the web at fat-bike.com/radio. We'll see you next time.
• 54:57
  [rock music]