Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / What happens when you LOVE a narcissist at their lowest point
Transcript
- 0:00What is going on, beautiful people?
- 0:02Today we're going to be answering the question, what
- 0:04happens when you love a narcissist at their lowest
- 0:08point? When you love a narcissist
- 0:10through thick and thin times? If you're new here, my name is
- 0:13Lee Hammock. I'm a clinically diagnosed
- 0:15narcissist. And welcome to another episode
- 0:17of The Narcissist Code. Welcome back, Welcome back.
- 0:38Welcome back folks. Yeah, y'all.
- 0:40Loving a narcissist at their lowest point.
- 0:43Now, I did a live recently about this kind of similar topics and
- 0:47whatnot, but this is going to be more in depth.
- 0:49This is going to dive into the toxicity in the mindset of a
- 0:53narcissist. When they're at their lowest
- 0:56point, when they have nothing else, like when you so many
- 1:01times y'all Matter of fact, matter of fact.
- 1:02I just literally just saw something like this on Facebook.
- 1:05I literally just saw something about his own Facebook, about a
- 1:09tik toker who met somebody and loved this person at their
- 1:14lowest. She's like, I loved him at his
- 1:15lowest. He had nothing to offer me, but
- 1:18then when he came up, he left me.
- 1:20Y'all. Literally.
- 1:23Literally, when you love them at their lowest, they resent you
- 1:28for it. That's what happens.
- 1:30They resent you. They come at you.
- 1:33They don't appreciate you. They don't thank you.
- 1:36They don't they. They're not gracious enough
- 1:38because they feel entitled to it.
- 1:39They feel entitled to your help and they hate you for it.
- 1:45Narcissistic people, a lot of them, not all of them are angry
- 1:49as hell at the fact that you feel entitled.
- 1:52Like narcissistic people are angry as hell that you feel so
- 2:00entitled. I mean that that that you are
- 2:02helping them, that you are in a better position than them, that
- 2:05you are able to help them through this, these tough times.
- 2:10Yeah, they feel like they like, how dare you be in a better
- 2:15position than me? How dare you?
- 2:16So if you, when you were like, you're standing up, like you're
- 2:19standing upright, you and you can reach down and pull them up.
- 2:24You can pull your toxic, narcissistic person up like,
- 2:27come on, I see, I I see the potential in you.
- 2:30I see the potential in you. And you lift them up out of
- 2:33nowhere, right? You lift them up out of out of
- 2:35the depths of of their life, They resent you for it.
- 2:40They might act appreciative of it at first.
- 2:43They might be like, thank you so much for being there for me.
- 2:46Thank you for believing in me. Thank you so much.
- 2:48But guess what happens when they get to that point where they
- 2:50want to be at? Guess what happens when they're
- 2:52all built up, when they're no longer at their lowest point,
- 2:56right, you. Like when they're at the depths,
- 2:58you lift them up to a higher level, they resent you for it,
- 3:01and a lot of times they leave your ass.
- 3:04So this is not a video about me going into the going into the
- 3:08depths or just like, hey, don't help narcissist, don't help your
- 3:12toxic partner, don't help this, this this bummy person out.
- 3:16This is not what I'm saying. This is, this is what I'm
- 3:19saying. Just like, be careful in doing
- 3:22so because not everybody is going to be appreciative of it.
- 3:25So many people have been left with nothing after giving their
- 3:29everything to Someone Like You. You, you get a loan in your name
- 3:34for them to start their business up.
- 3:36You put the business in their name, the loan is in your name,
- 3:39right? You put the loan in your name.
- 3:41They put the business and all the process proceeds and assets
- 3:46all in their names. Because this is smart, right?
- 3:48It's smart business. Let's put everything in my name
- 3:51so you can start a business under your name and it won't
- 3:53affect everything. So we can come together as a
- 3:55power couple, right, Power team? Right.
- 3:58You help them build it up. It's not always been a
- 4:00relationship, that intimate relationship.
- 4:01They can be your best friend or your cousin, sister, brother,
- 4:03whoever. You help build them up.
- 4:06And when the if the business takes off, guess what?
- 4:10They put a post on Facebook saying thank God for everything
- 4:15I've been blessed with. No, I I grinded for I had
- 4:19nothing. Nobody gave.
- 4:21Nobody gave me anything. Thank God, me is it me against
- 4:25the world, thank God and everything.
- 4:27Look you that you're not even in you, not even in a thank you
- 4:30post. You're not even in in the thank
- 4:33you post. And then they replace you with
- 4:36somebody else because they feel like you're like let's be
- 4:39realistic gal. They feel like because they have
- 4:41nothing. They feel like you're the best
- 4:43they're going to get. You are the best that I can get
- 4:47right now, right? And then when they level up,
- 4:51they feel like they deserve better quotation marks.
- 4:54I'm putting quotation marks. If y'all listening to this on
- 4:56the podcast, quotation marks, they feel like they deserve
- 4:59better. They feel like, oh, I've been
- 5:02grinding so long, I deserve better than you and they leave
- 5:06you high and dry. Your name isn't on the business.
- 5:09Your name isn't on any assets, Your name is on the loan.
- 5:12So they leave you high and dry for your ass to pay off the loan
- 5:15and shit. So This is why I'm telling y'all
- 5:18to protect your interest. I'm not telling you to not help
- 5:21people out. I'm telling you to protect your
- 5:24interest. If you're going to invest in
- 5:26someone else, whether it be your husband, wife, whoever it is,
- 5:29make sure that you get some there's there's some profit or
- 5:32some proceeds coming to you. Make sure if beginning with the
- 5:36end in mind. If this person leaves me high
- 5:39and dry, what do I have access to?
- 5:42Hey, look, I'm going to get a loan to start your business, but
- 5:46I need 25% ownership. I need 3550% ownership.
- 5:50If they say no, then I about to say F them, F them, I about to
- 5:54say F word, then F them. If they can't.
- 5:59Like that shows you their intent right there.
- 6:03Hey look, I don't I believe in you.
- 6:04I trust you. I know you're going to be
- 6:05successful. But look, I really need you to.
- 6:10I really need some ownership interest or something to protect
- 6:13my interest. That's like, yeah, pretty much
- 6:15it's it's like, look, look, y'all it's like signing a prenup
- 6:19for this business even if y'all are not married.
- 6:21This is like signing a business prenup just in case it goes
- 6:25sideways. I got my interests are
- 6:26protected. Hey, I'm getting $100,000 loan
- 6:30for you. The payments on this $100,000
- 6:32loan are insane. The payments on this hundred
- 6:36dollar $100,000 loan. I got a a EIDL loan during the
- 6:39pandemic. I got a EIDL loan during the
- 6:42pandemic for your business and I know it sounds crazy, but the
- 6:47payments on it are $500 a month. I can't afford this extra $500 a
- 6:51month for so long so I needed some protection.
- 6:53If your business takes off, it needed to at least cover this.
- 6:56I need 10% interest, 10% ownership, 15%.
- 6:59No, you can't own anything. It's you.
- 7:01Don't believe me, You don't trust me.
- 7:03Y'all come on, stop letting them gaslight.
- 7:05You manipulate you because they're going to leave you high
- 7:07and dry. That's the intent.
- 7:09The intent. If you set a boundary, that's A
- 7:11to me, that's a boundary. To me, that's a boundary, hey,
- 7:14Or a requirement at least. Hey, look, I don't mind getting
- 7:17this loan for you. It it might stretch me for a
- 7:20little while, but I believe you're going to turn the profit.
- 7:22But those profits need to be able to pay the loan off.
- 7:25So I needed for some protection. Can you sign this contract
- 7:27saying you will pay this loan off?
- 7:29Can you take over the loan? Can you give me 10% interest?
- 7:325%? Whatever?
- 7:34No, I can't do that because you don't believe me.
- 7:36You don't trust me. Help.
- 7:37Y'all. Come on now.
- 7:39Wake up. What happens when you build them
- 7:43up? When you love them, when they
- 7:44have nothing. They leave you when they have
- 7:45everything, when you love them at their lowest point.
- 7:49They leave you at their highest or on the ascension to their
- 7:53highest point. This is what I'm telling you.
- 7:56If you think it like This is why I'm telling you how to sit down
- 7:58somebody for some of y'all, it's just be realistic.
- 8:00It's too late. Y'all have already signed over
- 8:02the business. Y'all have already gotten loans.
- 8:04Y'all already quit your career and gave everything to them and
- 8:08they leave you having some of y'all have.
- 8:09It's already too late, right? This is for the people in this
- 8:14situation right here who haven't experienced it yet, right?
- 8:17And some of y'all this is to wake you.
- 8:18This is to give you the the clarity right here.
- 8:21So if you already experienced through this and already went
- 8:24through this, this is not saying turn the video off right now.
- 8:26But if you already experienced this, this is the help you
- 8:30understand. So it doesn't happen again.
- 8:32If you don't understand why it happened, because they hate the
- 8:35fact that you were in a better position in the NBA.
- 8:37They hate the fact that you were able to give them what they
- 8:40can't give themselves. It's like you're parenting them.
- 8:44You're in the position of power and they hate you for it, right?
- 8:48They hate the fact that you're in the position of power.
- 8:51They really do, you know, They really do.
- 8:55They hate the fact that you're in the position of power.
- 8:58You know what I mean? They do.
- 9:00My wife takes me. So funny.
- 9:01Yeah, That's why I'm not laughing at you.
- 9:03I promise. My wife takes me so funny.
- 9:04I sit there. I sit there and text.
- 9:05She takes me something back. So funny.
- 9:06My wife is hilarious. She's funny.
- 9:09That's why I love her. People are like, where you where
- 9:11you are. She's funny.
- 9:12Yeah. She matches my sense of humor.
- 9:13That's why I love my wife. One reason why I love my wife.
- 9:16But yeah, it's really, they hate the fact that you're in the
- 9:19position that, that you are in the position to sacrifice for
- 9:22them, to give them what they want.
- 9:23They can't do it themselves. They feel like they're entitled
- 9:26to it because, you know, the delusions are grandeur, right?
- 9:29So narcissists feel so entitled. I feel like I'm entitled to what
- 9:32you have just because I'm me. Not because I've earned it, not
- 9:36because I've done anything different, but just because I'm
- 9:39me. I feel like I deserve something
- 9:41from you. So that's what I'm telling y'all
- 9:43if you if you meet somebody at a low point, if you're on a first
- 9:46date with somebody and your career, if you're on a first
- 9:50date with somebody, I don't give a damn how funny they are, how
- 9:53attractive they are, how good the cheeks look.
- 9:56You know how funny they how the teeth, they got a pretty they
- 9:59got this veneers in. I don't care how that dreads
- 10:02are. I'm describing myself.
- 10:05But I don't care how much of the type of person you're looking
- 10:09for if they are not there when you need them to be financially
- 10:13or housing wise. So no, no y'all.
- 10:18I know there are fairy tale romances out there.
- 10:20I know there are. There are success stories that
- 10:23prove me wrong, I understand that.
- 10:25But I want you to protect your interest because when you love
- 10:29them at their lowest, they leave you at their highest.
- 10:33They do. Yeah.
- 10:34This, this happened so many times.
- 10:35I heard. Yeah, I've been doing one on
- 10:37ones for over three years now. Yeah, It's been since April 21,
- 10:43April 2021. I've been in one-on-one for over
- 10:45three years now. I've spoken to thousands of
- 10:47people and I've heard this story so much.
- 10:51So protect your interests. Not only will they not give me
- 10:5410% of the company lead, they've refused to marry me because they
- 10:57don't want. They don't trust you in that
- 11:00space right there. They think that you're going to
- 11:02be there being Boo, Boo the fool and just be.
- 11:04Give them Willy nilly and then they leave you and they leave
- 11:08you. They seriously do so protect
- 11:12your interests. And just because they leave you
- 11:14relationship wise doesn't mean that they will leave you alone.
- 11:18They will move on to somebody else and hold you hostage.
- 11:20They love holding you hostage in a relationship.
- 11:23Hey, you can't leave me. You don't care about me.
- 11:25Y'all come on now, it's time to wake up.
- 11:27In 2024 is the year we wake the hell up you wake up.
- 11:33I know so many people have Co opted the word woke and did some
- 11:36BS with it. It's time to be woke When it
- 11:40comes to being in toxic relationships and having these
- 11:43narcissistic people making you look let allow you making you
- 11:46look stupid. So it's OK to be woke sometimes.
- 11:50So wake up, stay in power. Y'all and stop giving these
- 11:53people everything when you. I know you trust and believe in
- 11:56people, but make sure your assets are protected.
- 11:58Make sure your interests are protected.
- 12:00Hey, sign this, this relationship prenup.
- 12:02Sign this. Sign this business prenup for me
- 12:05right now. You know what I mean?
- 12:06I love you, but sign this real quick.
- 12:09Protect yourself. Y'all Invest in yourself, you
- 12:12know what I mean? And make sure you subscribe to
- 12:14my channel. And of course, but to him.
- 12:16This is that peace. Thank you so much for making it
- 12:19to the end of my video. I am extremely grateful for you
- 12:21have no idea. If you haven't already, make
- 12:23sure you go ahead and subscribe to the channel.
- 12:25Help us reach more people and click on the screen to watch
- 12:27another video or to browse through another playlist.
- 12:29There's also a link on the screen to check out my courses
- 12:32and my support groups to help you heal and understand what
- 12:34you've been through. Thank you so much again.
- 12:36I will see you in the next video.
- 12:37Peace.