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PAMOJA MINISTRY — REFINED FOR A PURPOSE CONVERSATION XI — THE CRACK BEFORE THE COLLAPSE · PAMOJA PODCAST | PAMOJA MINISTRY, A LIFE OF CHRIST INTERNATIONAL MINISTRIES

• 0:00
  Welcome back to our continuing conversation on
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  Refine for a Purpose. In our last conversation,
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  we asked a difficult question. Can God trust
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  your integrity? We discovered that integrity
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  is not simply about never failing. Integrity
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  is revealed when our character is tested, when
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  nobody is watching, when temptation comes, when
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  we are angry, when we are hurt, when we have
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  authority, when compromise would be easier. and
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  we discovered that God may not only be preparing
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  the blessing, God may be preparing us for the
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  weight of the blessing, but today I want us to
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  go one step further. Because integrity usually
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  does not collapse in one moment. There is often
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  something that happens first. In an earlier season
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  of Pamoja Ministry, we had a conversation called,
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  When the Strong Get Tired, and we discovered
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  something important. Strong people can become
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  tired. Faithful people can become discouraged.
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  Disciplined people can become vulnerable. People
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  who have survived enormous battles can still
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  experience moments when their defenses are down.
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  But people rarely collapse simply because they
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  became tired. Usually something happens between
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  weariness and collapse. A boundary moves. A compromise
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  is justified. An attitude is excused. A warning
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  is ignored. A conviction is silenced. Something
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  you once resisted. You begin entertaining. Something
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  you once confessed, you begin defending. Something
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  you once considered dangerous, you begin believing
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  you can control. And slowly, a crack develops.
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  The problem with a crack is that initially, the
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  structure can still look strong. The building
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  is still standing. The ministry is still functioning.
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  The marriage is still together. The career is
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  still progressing. The person is still preaching,
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  still working, still leading. still smiling,
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  still posting, still praying. From the outside,
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  everything may appear intact. But somewhere beneath
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  the surface, something is cracking. And that
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  is what makes this conversation so important.
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  Because collapse rarely begins on the day everybody
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  sees it. Usually something has been cracking
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  quietly for a long time. And perhaps one of God's
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  greatest acts of mercy is allowing you to see
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  the crack while there is still time to repair
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  it. So today, our continuing conversation on
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  refine for purpose is the crack before the collapse.
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  What are the small compromises we keep ignoring?
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  What attitudes have we started excusing? What
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  boundaries have we slowly moved? What habits
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  are growing where nobody can see them? What warning
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  signs have we dismissed? What conviction from
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  the Holy Spirit have we repeatedly silenced?
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  Because maybe God is not exposing the crack to
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  embarrass you. Maybe he is exposing it to save
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  what the crack could eventually destroy. And
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  listen carefully, the collapse is public. The
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  crack is often private. When a building collapses,
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  everybody sees the collapse. But engineers may
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  later discover that the structural problem existed
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  long before the building came down. Maybe there
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  was corrosion. Maybe there was repeated stress.
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  Maybe there was a fracture. Maybe something had
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  been weakening beneath the surface. The collapse
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  happened suddenly. The deterioration didn't.
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  And sometimes human character works the same
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  way. We see someone fall and say, how did this
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  happen? But perhaps the better question is, when
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  did the crack begin? Because the visible failure
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  may have happened today. But the boundary started
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  moving months ago. The affair became public today.
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  But emotional boundaries may have been disappearing
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  long before. The angry explosion happened today.
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  But bitterness may have been accumulating for
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  years. The financial scandal became public today.
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  But entitlement may have been growing privately
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  for a long time. The ministry collapsed today.
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  But accountability may have disappeared years
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  earlier. The marriage broke today, but communication
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  may have been dying quietly for a long time.
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  The person walked away from God today, but prayer
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  had been disappearing, the word had been neglected,
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  conviction had been resisted, and slowly the
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  distance grew. The collapse gets the attention,
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  but God was speaking at the crack. James explains
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  something similar about temptation. James 1 .14
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  -15 teaches that a person is tempted when drawn
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  away by his own desire and enticed. Then desire
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  conceives. Then sin is born. And when sin is
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  fully grown, it produces death. Notice the progression.
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  Desire, enticement, conception, sin, growth,
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  death. There is a process. We often focus on
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  the final stage. God is concerned about what
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  is happening at the beginning. Because if you
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  address the crack early enough, perhaps you never
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  have to experience the collapse. And this is
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  why we cannot despise conviction. Conviction
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  is an early warning system. There are moments
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  when the Holy Spirit makes you uncomfortable.
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  You said something and afterward something inside
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  you said that wasn't right. You entered a conversation
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  and something told you, you shouldn't be here.
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  You started becoming too close to someone. and
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  something inside you said, this boundary is becoming
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  dangerous. You made a financial decision and
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  felt this isn't honest. You responded in anger
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  and knew immediately that wasn't the person God
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  is calling me to become. You started hiding something,
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  deleting something, explaining something, justifying
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  something. And deep inside, you knew sometimes
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  that discomfort is not condemnation. Sometimes
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  it is protection. The Holy Spirit is saying,
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  look at the crack, not because God wants to humiliate
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  you, because he knows where the crack can lead.
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  One of the most dangerous things we can do is
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  repeatedly silence what once convicted us, because
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  there is a progression that should concern every
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  believer. First, something bothers you, then
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  you explain it, then you justify it, then you
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  repeat it. then you normalize it, and eventually,
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  you defend it. What once required an apology
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  becomes part of your personality. What once brought
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  conviction becomes something you now call, that's
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  just who I am. Be careful, because refinement
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  requires us to remain sensitive to correction.
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  And sometimes the evidence of spiritual maturity
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  is not that conviction disappears, it is that
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  we respond to conviction faster. There is a small
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  verse in Song of Solomon 2 .15 that says, catch
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  for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin
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  the vineyards. The little foxes, not the enormous
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  animals, the little ones. Because sometimes what
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  destroys something valuable begins small. A little
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  compromise. A little dishonesty. A little flirtation.
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  A little bitterness. A little pride. A little
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  secret. A little resentment. A little habit.
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  A little boundary moved. A little prayer life
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  neglected. And because it looks small, we tolerate
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  it. But small does not mean harmless. Little
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  compromises can create large consequences. Look
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  at Samson. People often remember Samson's collapse
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  as the moment Delilah had his haircut. But Samson's
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  problem did not begin with the haircut. Long
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  before Delilah, Samson had been playing with
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  boundaries. He repeatedly moved toward things
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  that should have made him cautious. He became
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  comfortable living close to compromise. And eventually,
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  he began telling Delilah pieces of the truth.
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  Closer, closer, closer. Until Judges 16 says
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  that he told her everything. That is how boundaries
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  often disappear. Not always through one enormous
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  decision. Sometimes through inches, one conversation,
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  one message, one meeting, one justification,
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  one exception, one more time. And eventually,
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  you look backward and realize, I am standing
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  somewhere I once promised myself I would never
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  go. That is the danger of moving boundaries slowly.
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  If somebody asked you on the first day to cross
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  the final line, you might say, absolutely not.
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  But compromise rarely begins by asking for everything.
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  It asks for something small, and then something
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  smaller becomes normal. And once that becomes
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  normal, it asks for something more. Until eventually,
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  the abnormal becomes familiar. This is why scripture
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  warns in 1 Corinthians 10 -12, Let him that thinketh,
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  he standeth take heed, lest he fall. The danger
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  is not strength. The danger is believing strength
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  makes you immune. And this takes us back to when
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  the strong get tired. Sometimes strong people
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  become especially vulnerable because everyone
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  depends on them. They are always carrying, always
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  solving, always helping, always leading, always
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  producing. And because everybody sees their strength,
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  Nobody asks whether they are becoming depleted.
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  Sometimes, they don't even ask themselves. And
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  when exhaustion combines with isolation, disappointment,
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  unresolved pain, temptation, and opportunity,
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  the crack can grow quickly. This is why rest
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  is spiritual. Accountability is spiritual. Boundaries
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  are spiritual. Honest conversations are spiritual.
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  Saying, I need help can be spiritual maturity.
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  Because you don't have to wait until you collapse
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  to admit that something is weakening. Strong
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  people still need guardrails. Think about David.
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  Second Samuel 11 begins with an interesting detail.
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  It was the season when kings went out to war,
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  but David remained in Jerusalem. One evening
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  he got up from his bed and walked on the roof,
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  and there he saw Bathsheba. Now David's entire
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  collapse cannot be reduced to one detail, but
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  scripture deliberately gives us the setting.
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  David was not where we might have expected the
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  king to be. Then he saw. Then he inquired. Then
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  he sent. Then he took. Again, progression. Saw.
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  Inquired. Sent. Took. There were multiple moments
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  where the process could have stopped, and that
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  is important. Because sometimes we talk about
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  temptation as though there is only one moment
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  of decision. Often there are many. God gives
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  us exits, a moment to stop, a moment to reconsider,
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  a moment to listen, a moment to call somebody,
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  a moment to leave, a moment to confess, a moment
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  to say, this is going too far. The question is
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  whether we recognize the exit before the crack
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  becomes a collapse. And then look at Peter. Before
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  Peter denied Jesus, Jesus warned him. Luke 22
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  records Jesus telling Peter that Satan desired
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  to sift him like wheat. Peter responded confidently.
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  He believed he was ready. He believed he was
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  strong. He believed he could handle the pressure.
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  But Jesus saw something Peter could not yet see.
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  That is another form of mercy. The warning before
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  the failure. Sometimes God sends a scripture.
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  Sometimes a sermon. Sometimes a spouse, sometimes
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  a friend, sometimes a mentor, sometimes a leader,
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  sometimes a conversation, sometimes an uncomfortable
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  feeling you cannot shake. And because we don't
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  like the message, we become angry at the messenger.
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  But what if the warning is mercy? What if God
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  is trying to interrupt something before it grows?
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  Proverbs tells us that wounds from a faithful
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  friend can be trusted. Sometimes somebody who
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  loves you enough to make you uncomfortable is
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  more valuable than somebody who keeps you comfortable
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  while you are drifting. And this is where pride
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  becomes dangerous. Pride doesn't only say, I
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  am better than everybody. Sometimes pride says,
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  nobody can tell me anything. Nobody can correct
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  me. Nobody understands me. Nobody knows what
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  I've been through. I know what I'm doing. I can
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  handle it. I can stop whenever I want. I'm not
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  going that far. It won't happen to me. Those
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  sentences should frighten us because confidence
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  without accountability can become blindness.
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  And maybe this is why God allows certain uncomfortable
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  moments during the refining process. He is confronting
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  us while there is still time. He is saying, look
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  at this. Look at your anger. Look at your pride.
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  Look at your relationship with money. Look at
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  your private conversations Look at your boundaries
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  Look at the way you speak to your spouse Look
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  at the way you treat people beneath your authority
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  Look at what you are watching Look at what you
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  are hiding Look at what you keep deleting Look
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  at the resentment you keep feeding Look at what
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  you have stopped praying about because you already
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  know what I would tell you not to shame you,
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  to save you. Because maybe the greatest miracle
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  is not always God rebuilding your life after
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  collapse. Maybe sometimes the miracle is God
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  showing you the crack early enough that collapse
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  never has to happen. And this requires humility.
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  Don't defend what God is trying to remove. This
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  is difficult. Because when God touches something
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  we have become attached to, we immediately begin
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  explaining. Everybody does it. It's not that
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  serious. You don't understand. I deserve this.
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  I've been through a lot. I'm still a good person.
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  And perhaps all of that may contain pieces of
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  truth, but none of it answers the real question.
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  What is the Holy Spirit saying? Because refinement
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  is not about comparing yourself with everybody
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  else. The refiner is looking at what does not
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  belong in you. There may be something another
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  person can handle. that you cannot. There may
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  be a relationship that has become unhealthy for
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  you. There may be an environment that awakens
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  something dangerous in you. There may be access
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  you need to restrict. There may be a conversation
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  you need to stop. There may be a habit you need
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  to confront. There may be an apology you need
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  to make. There may be accountability you need
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  to restore. And sometimes obedience looks very
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  practical. Delete the number. Leave the conversation.
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  Change the routine. Stop going there. Tell somebody
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  the truth. Ask for help. Put the boundary back.
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  Rest. Pray. Return to scripture. Return to community.
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  Return to God. Don't wait for catastrophe to
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  become serious about something God has already
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  been whispering about, because the crack is easier
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  to repair than the collapse. But there is something
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  else I want us to understand. The crack does
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  not mean the structure is worthless. If an engineer
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  discovers a crack in a building, the purpose
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  of inspection is not automatically to demolish
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  the building. The first question is, can it be
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  repaired? Can it be reinforced? Can the pressure
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  be relieved? Can what has weakened be strengthened?
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  And perhaps somebody needs to hear that spiritually.
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  God showing you weakness does not mean God has
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  abandoned you. God correcting your character
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  does not mean he has canceled your purpose. God
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  revealing something ugly inside you does not
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  mean there is nothing beautiful he can still
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  produce through you. Sometimes revelation is
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  the beginning of restoration. David's sin was
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  exposed. Peter's weakness was exposed. Moses'
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  anger was exposed. Jacob's character was confronted,
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  and God dealt with them, sometimes painfully,
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  sometimes through consequences, sometimes through
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  discipline. But exposure did not automatically
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  mean abandonment. And this prepares us for something
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  we need to understand in our next conversation.
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  Because when God reveals the crack, what comes
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  next may feel uncomfortable. Correction. Discipline.
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  Consequences. Conviction. And sometimes we interpret
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  all of those things as rejection. But scripture
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  teaches something very different. Hebrews tells
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  us that the Lord disciplines those he loves.
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  So perhaps the correction you are resisting is
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  not evidence that God has walked away. Perhaps
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  it is evidence that God refuses to leave you
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  the way you are. And that will bring us to our
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  next continuing conversation. When God corrects
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  the person he loves, correction is not rejection.
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  But before we get there, I want you to sit with
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  this question. What crack has God been showing
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  me? Not your spouse's crack. Not your friend's
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  crack. Not your pastor's crack. Not your co -worker's
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  crack. Not the person you saw on social media.
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  Yours. What have you been excusing? What boundary
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  has moved? What conviction have you silenced?
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  What warning have you dismissed? What habit has
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  become stronger? What attitude have you started
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  defending? What are you hiding? What have you
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  stopped bringing before God? Maybe this conversation
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  itself is part of God's mercy. Maybe God is allowing
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  you to see something while there is still time
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  to address it. Don't run from the light. Don't
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  defend the crack. Don't cover what God wants
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  to heal. Bring it to Him. Repent where repentance
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  is necessary. Repair what can be repaired. Restore
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  the boundary. receive accountability, ask for
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  help, return to prayer, return to the word, return
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  to obedience. Because collapse does not have
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  to become your testimony. Maybe your testimony
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  can be, God showed me the crack and I listen.
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  Maybe years from now, you will look backward
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  and realize that the uncomfortable conviction
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  you felt in this season was actually God's protection
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  over your marriage. Protection over your family.
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  Protection over your ministry. Protection over
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  your career. Protection over your calling. Protection
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  over your future. Protection over your life.
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  Because sometimes God's mercy does not look like
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  ignoring the crack. Sometimes God's mercy looks
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  like revealing it. You are being refined. Not
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  humiliated. Not discarded. Not abandoned. Refined.
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  And perhaps God is showing you what must be repaired
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  because He knows what He is preparing you to
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  carry. Don't waste the warning. Don't silence
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  the conviction. Don't ignore the crack. Let God
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  refine it now before the crack becomes the collapse.
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  You are being refined for a purpose.