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Science Of Success – Leveraging Yourself Through Science · The Missing Secret Podcast

• 0:04
  Kelly Hatfield: We believe life is precious. This is it. We've got one shot at this. It's on us to live life to the fullest, to maximize what we've been given, and play the game of life at our full potential.
• 0:17
  John Mitchell: Are you living up to your potential? Are you frustrated that despite your best intentions, you just can't seem to make the changes needed to take things to the next level so you can impact your career, relationships and health?
• 0:31
  Kelly Hatfield: If this is hitting home, you're in the right place. Our mission is to open the door to the exceptional life by showing you how to play the game of life at a higher level, so you're playing at your full potential, rather than at a fraction, as most people do. We'll share the one thing that once we learned it, our lives were transformed, and once you learn it, watch what happens.
• 0:59
  Welcome to Think It Be It the podcast. I'm Kelly Hatfield
• 1:04
  John Mitchell: Hey, and I'm John Mitchell. So the topic this week is the science of success, leveraging yourself through science. And so Kelly, I've got an idea. You ready for my idea?
• 1:17
  Kelly Hatfield: Oh, let's hear it. They're all brilliant.
• 1:21
  John Mitchell: Oh, yeah, right, right, while you're second that today. So we've got an idea, really, for the magic 36 over the next three weeks. Let's actually teach you how to do our methodology and give you access to the template. And now is the appropriate time to do this, because our algorithm is ready to be beta tested. And so let's teach you the fundamental science today, and then next week, we'll give you access to the AI algorithm, which will let you customize our template to your unique life. And all you have to do is just answer like 40 questions, punch a button and it customizes it to your life. And then after you have it physically in your idol of lands, then the third week will explain how to use what we call our life GPS template and implement our methodology in your life. So, Kelly, how's that sound?
• 2:23
  Kelly Hatfield: That sounds good. I'm excited. Let's do this.
• 2:26
  John Mitchell: Okay, okay, well, why don't you start us off? We're so today, we're going to talk about the science, and one of the key things is the reticular activating system, which I bet a lot of people may not know what that is. Would you just explain what that is?
• 2:43
  Kelly Hatfield: Absolutely, and this was John, honestly, there were a couple of things that are aha moments, but the reticular activating system, for me, was where the light bulb first came on when we were talking about the science, which is your reticular activating system is literally the filter for your brain. So you know, whatever you tell your brain to look for, it will find for you. You know it will bring that into your consciousness and awareness. And the problem that so many of us have is that we're not informing that reticular activating system. You know, you're just kind of like winging it and flying by the seat of your pants. And so when you are clear and provide that reticular activating system clarity, it will start to look, you know, and seek those things out, you know. And I know, there's a common kind of reference that's used where you know the car, you know, analogy, right? Where you know, if you're out looking for you know, or have a particular vehicle on your mind, maybe you've just purchased something, and then now you see them everywhere. You know, it's that, but you know, it's that kind of that's the where that's coming from, is your reticular activating system. It's brought that into your awareness, and now it's, it's finding it. And so that, for me, was a game changer, because when I got clarity around, you know who, you know what I wanted to achieve, who I needed to be, the skills I needed to acquire, you know, the things that were going to move the needle in my business, all of those things, then it filtered out all the other stuff that didn't matter anymore, and it zeroed in and focused on those things that were important to me, and filtered those things into my life. And so that for me, the reticular activating system was huge, just in terms of learning how the human mind works.
• 4:31
  John Mitchell: Had you ever heard about it before?
• 4:34
  Kelly Hatfield: I had not, not maybe kind of in passing, you know, through maybe a podcast where they reference split, but not could really understanding the significance of it and also the role like, I think that there's a lot of people who mistake you the law of attraction for you know, really what's happening. There's a lot of science behind that. It's not Woo. Woo. It literally, if you you know. Are clear about what you want your brain to filter in. It will it? Will find it for you. Well, this
• 5:05
  John Mitchell: Literally, is the law of attraction, the reticular activating system, the science that's obviously science, yeah, is the law of attraction. You know, you'd find this interesting. So I interviewed Steve Sarkisian, the football coach here at the University of Texas. And, you know, it's interesting, he's they're now paying him $11 million a year, 11 million plus. He's like the second, I think, second, highest paid football coach in the country. And so I interview him every year, and I have a great relationship with him. And and he was telling me he's into the law of attraction. And I'm like, I have never heard a coach tell me they're into the law of attraction, but he was telling me that with his players every Friday, he sits them down and on three by five cards, they have to write down three things they're grateful for. And he says, the reason I'm doing that is the law of attraction. When with you, you'll feed that to yourself, you feel grateful for the things that you're feeding yourself, and that's how the reticular activating system works at filter for the brain has to get what's important to you, because the science here is that the brain is getting can only intake about 100 bits of information every second, and but you have way more than that coming in every second. And so it has to be a there has to be a filter in the the reticular activating system really acts like the nightclub bouncer in the brain and but you got to give it the clarity about what's important. And that's, that's the power of having a visualization where you're feeding the succinct articulation of your life to yourself, right?
• 7:00
  Kelly Hatfield: Yeah, absolutely. And I think of it a lot too, from, you know, in like Google, you know, when you tell something and you you have a targeted question, you're asking it, and it pulls that information in that, you know, applies to the question you just asked, right? It's very similar. You're very specific with it, and then it finds it. It's funny, John, when I started, first started doing the technique, you know, in our methodology, I was amazed at just that one, you know, the subconscious stuff that we're going to go to. 95% of your thoughts think subconscious. We're going to hit that here in just a second. But that reticular activating system was like, wow. Because once I got clear, for example, about the things that move the needle in my business, then all of these things that were in front of me the whole time, but because I didn't have a lot of clarity around, you know, the direction I was going to move things in, I wasn't seeing, but they were there the whole time. And that could have been connections, you know, like that would help me get from point A to point B, or, you know, a new revenue stream that I hadn't thought of, you know, but because my brain knew the direction I wanted to go in and what the end goal was. It was searching and finding these connection points for me that I hadn't seen before, but they really were there the whole time. Does that?
• 8:16
  John Mitchell: You know that that's that falls what we talked about last week, that your success is already in your head, yeah. And, you know, it's, it's interesting. You said it just a second ago that that you didn't see your life as as clearly and and, you know, that's how everybody operates, and especially today. I mean, you know, we're all living life at a very shallow level, primarily because of this flip through culture we live in that's driven by social media and so, you know, that's why this technique is sort of slapping you upside the head and telling you, okay, let's just step back from your life and make you really think about your life, and really think about who do you want to be, and what do you want to accomplish, and exactly how are you going to achieve your your goals. You know, take that clarity to, uh, to a level that it hasn't been before. And and again, the beauty of our algorithm is it helps you do that. Because if you were just told to go do that on your own, you'd be stuck, you know, right? Well, it's overwhelming, totally, right, right? You don't, you sort of know conceptually what that means, but not specifically. And so that's why this algorithm, I think, such a game changer. But that's the power is when you we force you to to take what's already in your head, just take it to a much deeper level, and then then you feed that to yourself every day. Well, of course, it's going to affect everything. It's going to fail affect the filter for the brain, the. A reticular activating system. You know, it'll affect everything, because, as you learn, the subconscious mind is influenced by repetition and and maybe, that's maybe the next step. Let's talk about, you know, let's talk about how the human mind works. But let me preface that and say that, and this is fundamental to success, is that your success is determined by your daily actions. The the cumulative effect of your daily actions determines your success in each area of your of your life. I don't think anybody would argue with that, but I would also say that most people don't appreciate the profound power of that. And so therefore, you know, your daily actions determine your success. And the game changer for me, once I got that was once I realized, Oh, well, wait a minute. Now I see the science says that 95% of my daily thoughts and actions are unconscious. Then I started connecting the dots. If my actions determine my success, and 95% of them are unconscious, then I'm playing the game of life at 5% of my potential if I don't gain control of those unconscious daily actions. And so that was the big, big epiphany for me. And now let me explain how the human mind works, and this will come together. I think so. The conscious mind sets your intention and is influenced by logic. The subconscious mind controls your daily actions and is only influenced by repetition. It doesn't care about logic. And so the example we've used 100 times is, say you want to lose weight. Well, conscious mind sets the intention to lose weight based on the logic of the health benefits. But you know, the reason people aren't losing weight is it's not from lack of intention. It's from lack of influencing the part of the brain that is actually controlling your actions, which is the subconscious mind. And again, it only responds to repetition. And so, you know, if you, you know, create the intention in the conscious mind, but you don't take that second step of influencing the subconscious mind with that daily repetition of your desired life, the succinct articulation of your life, then everything just stays an intention. You know, it's interesting. I was talking to my friend Steve Pendergrass, who who has done our method, and he's teaching it to other people, and he's telling me that is now, uh, I forget what he calls it, uh, one of the leaders in the Darren Hardy group they have, you know, Darren Hardy, who is arguably the top expert in the world On Success. He has this sort of club, and Steve is one of the, I forget the name he calls it, but he's one of the leaders of it. And so they were going over, you know, Darren's program for he has sort of an organizational system and where you lay out your goals and all that. And as he was talking to the people in his the five people in his group, they said, you know, this was cool and it was fun, but I still can't do the key behaviors consistently. I'll do them now. And then he goes, Well, I got a 12 minute a day technique, and I do 100% of the time. And so they're all very interested. And now he's going to teach him the methodology, but, but That's so typical that you know you gotta influence the subconscious mind, because while the conscious mind is setting the intentions, they're staying intentions. If you don't take the second step and influence the subconscious mind, Does that all make sense?
• 14:02
  Kelly Hatfield: Yeah, no, it makes perfect sense. And it's also too John, why you know? So you can set the intention, you know, to in the example that you just gave, to lose weight. And while talking about 95% of your thoughts, you know in actions, being unconscious or being in your subconscious, it's why you know. So you've got the intention to lose weight, but all of the actions you're currently taking don't support losing weight. Yeah, you know what I mean, like you're taking actions. They're just not the actions that are supporting, you know, you losing weight. So what you're choosing to eat, the repetitive behavior that you have, you know, choosing making choices to stay on the couch, versus maybe getting up and going on a walk or making selecting the wrong kind of food or whatever the case is. You know, that's what's interesting about this, is that you know, to drive home the point that the quality of your life, you know, is directly connected to your unconscious actions that you're taking. And so. Right as we're talking right now, I want you to think about the type of actions you're taking, because you're taking action throughout the day on things. It's just are those actions, you know, aligning and bringing you to where you want to be in life? Likely not, if you're listening to this and if you're interested in growth and that kind of thing. But when you first use that analogy to help me understand the conscious and subconscious. That was where light came on for me. I was like, oh, okay, I get the because when you're talking 5% of your brain 95 right? Sometimes it can kind of get lost. But as soon as you shared that analogy, the light came on for me and for many of the people that we work with that was like, Okay, this makes sense for me now,
• 15:40
  John Mitchell: So why don't? Why don't you explain to the to our audience, why feeding the succinct articulation of your life to yourself each day works? Well, why does everyone
• 15:51
  Kelly Hatfield: It's the repetition that you're right we just talked about. It's the your brain needs that repetition to break. You know, the patterns, so much of the actions that you're taking that are on autopilot right now. You've developed those over a long period of time. You know, it's why you you know you're taking you are repeating patterns. They're just not the patterns that are setting you up for success. And
• 16:15
  John Mitchell: You know, tell, tell that great story you got about remember when you first started doing this and and you wanted to ask your questions, that's such a great tell and tell that one that
• 16:26
  Kelly Hatfield: Yeah. So this one was a big deal for me. So when we sat down and we were really looking at, okay, what are the things that are kind of keeping me from moving the business to the next level? And one of those things that we identified was that I was really still working in the business on the day to day, and not necessarily spending as much time working on the business that I needed to. And so then we started kind of digging to determine, Okay, well, why are you still working in the business? You have a team, you know, and realizing that it's coming for me, you know. And it was my leadership. It was something that I needed to develop. I had become the problem solver in in the business, and had not done a good job at developing our internal team and empowering them to solve problems on their own. They could come to me and I would solve them for I'm like, hey, well, this is going on. What should I do? Okay, do this. This, this. So it was that problem solver mode that I was always in, not realizing that I was really taking away opportunity from the team to grow, you know, and and then to allow me to to work on the business, instead of in it. So in my methodology, in my life, GPS, one of the things that I put down to break a pattern, because my pattern here, my subconscious right now, the actions that I was taking was as soon as a question was asked, I would answer it. So I had to train that subconscious to when a question was asked of me, so when somebody came and stood in the doorway of my office and asked me a question. Now I'm training myself to ask at least three questions before I solve the issue. And here's the wonderful thing that happened as a result of that. So the first question usually is a pretty easy one, and the rest kind of have to do with the responses I get. But the first question was always, well, what do you think that you should do? How do you think we should handle this? And then they would go into their so it was beginning to help them understand how to think about it. And then my next questions would be related to whatever they shared. Well, by the time we were done having the conversation, they had solved the problem. It allowed me to kind of watch them in real time solve a problem, and slowly but surely with confidence over the course of about a six month time period, I gained, God, I don't it was at least 10 hours a week back in dealing with the day to day stuff that I didn't need to deal with, because I'd empowered my team. But it took through repetition, you know, training myself through our methodology, to make sure do not answer the question, ask three questions, and I carried that into every area of my life, because it was so effective in just building relationships. But, I mean, an amazing, but amazing. So yeah, that's what I did and and just achieved amazing results as a as a result of doing that.
• 19:18
  John Mitchell: And tell everybody it didn't happen the first day you started reading the vision, it was about a about a three week process, right?
• 19:28
  Kelly Hatfield: Yeah, three week and, you know, so how it initially went was, so it goes into my visualization first week. I'm reading it every day. I've got people popping into my office, and they're halfway down the hallway after I've answered the question, and I'm like, Oh, I missed an opportunity, but I recognize that I missed an opportunity. Right, right? Week two, they pop into my doorway, and I'm just starting to answer it, and I catch myself and I ask a question, and maybe. I still solve the problem, but I've asked a question. Week three, I am like, you know, dialed in and asking, you know, the questions and you know, so it is a process. It takes a and because I've created that clarity, and because I'm repeatedly feeding that to myself every day, and so my subconscious is getting a constant reminder of, remember, you know, if you want, because the end goal, right, is to get more time back and not work in my business anymore, to work on my business, right, very clear about what the end is. It's now working for me, you know, rather than against me. But it took about three to four weeks before it became automatic. And then, before, then I trans, I was able to translate it into other areas in my life too, right?
• 20:47
  John Mitchell: Well. And you know, that's the magic of it. You know, the the subconscious mind is not used to this. And you know, I, I'll tell the story about, you know, when I got married, and, you know, I decided I wanted to be flexible, patient and thoughtful. And I know what you're thinking. Of course, you're always flexible, patient and confident, but
• 21:10
  Kelly Hatfield: You read my mind,
• 21:12
  John Mitchell: Yes, right? And so I'm thinking, you know, this probably be a good idea, because it was so hard for me to get anybody to marry me that, you know, I damn sure didn't want to lose the ginge. And so when I got married, I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna I would be flexible, patient and thoughtful. So I feed that to myself every day and and as you've heard many times, at 15 days in, you know, I wasn't any more flexible, patient or thoughtful than I was at the start, but then, like the 21st day, Jen says something irritating, and you know, in that moment, I'm just flexible, patient and thoughtful. I mean, I didn't have to think about it. That's who I had become. And you know, it didn't work for that first 15 days, because there's something about this subconscious mind at first, when you start doing this, it thinks, oh, this is going to go away, because it's always gone away in the past. And then there's a point where it goes, Huh, this doesn't seem to be going away. And then when it finally goes, Okay, I give up. I give up. You know, whatever he's feeding my me, I'm going to now give it up and make it show up in his sauce and actions automatically. But that's, that's how it works. I mean, I'm always amazed at it's always around that three week mark and and now I have seen, and that's, that's how work, 95% of the time. You know, there's 5% of the time where you're going to have to adjust what you're saying to yourself. Maybe it's not specific enough. Maybe you're asking it to do a negative what you can't do there. There could be something in there that you gotta fix. But it's just amazing how it how it really works.
• 23:06
  Kelly Hatfield: I think too, one of the things that helps, and I know we go over this with our clients, is being clear about, you know, it's one thing when it doesn't work, you know, so that 5% of the time where there's resistance there, you know, oftentimes it's digging a little bit further in to understand, you know, why it's not working. So it could be language and the way that it's being framed. I've worked with some of our clients too, where, when you really get to the bottom of it, it's not actually something they really want, yeah, something that they think they should want, or that they you know, and so it's not, they're not connected to it deeply on a why level, about why this is this is important, and sometimes it is something they really want, like if it's health related, and then you just need to connect a little bit further to why it's so important. You know that whatever this goal is, if it's to lose weight, or if it's right, you know? So it's just those little sometimes, those little tweaks that make all the difference in that last 5% you know, where maybe you're having some challenges with it,
• 24:08
  John Mitchell: Right? Well, like even in your example, you know, one of your things that you would affirm is that you were a people pleaser, and you would address that, which was sort of related to answering people's questions. And so you see, when you create this immense intention and clarity about your life and feed it to yourself, you're coming at that subconscious mind with a whole lot of stuff. You're impacting the person you are, you're impacting your business, you're impacting your health, you're impacting your romantic relationship. You're you're impacting your spirituality. It's a it's a holistic approach. And the beautiful thing about it is this works 100% of the time. If you're human, it freaking works. And because it's pure science, it can't not work. So you. That's a beautiful thing about it. And and the other thing I would maybe add to this, and this is foundational to this, is in your life, GPS template you'll articulate that you do what you say you're going to do. Now that is critical because, and in fact, in my view, needs to be one of everybody's three core values, basically a foundational principle in their life, because that, that is the engine that drives this. Because what happens is, if you're feeding every day that I do what I say I'm going to do, and that's my integrity, and you adjust your psyche around that maybe, maybe you're already there, maybe you're not. You know, the research shows that people do what they say they're going to do about 60% of the time and 40% of the time they don't. But when you feed it to yourself every day, what ends up happening fairly quickly is you start to do what you say you're going to do 100% of the time. And and that will cause you, at first, a little grief, because you will see that you're not doing what you say you're going to do, and that causes guilt. And and that guilt is unpleasant, and so you had to deal with that, and then that. But, you know, I see that this works that say, well, it works its way through in about 30 days that you're like, you know, I don't, I don't want to feel that guilt, and I do want to do what I say I'm going to do 100% of the time. And then after about 30 days, all that guilt is gone, because it's just easier to do whatever you say than to not do what you say you're going to do, right?
• 26:50
  Kelly Hatfield: Yeah. And I think one thing, and we touched on this on prior episodes, is it becomes part of your identity. Yes, yes. You know, so doing what you say you're going to do becomes part of your identity, and what's really and what's really interesting is that the longer you do it, the more nuanced it gets, right? So initially it's about keeping commitments to yourself, but then it becomes the filter. So one thing that I really noticed is that I started being very careful about what I said yes to, because I'm like, I'm so I'm very careful with how I commit my time. I because I identified that that was one of the places where I wasn't keeping doing what I said I was going to do was related to my calendar, and part of the problem was, was because I was not being very careful and selective about what I was saying yes to because I wasn't clear about what my objectives, goals, the direction I was going into. Like all of these things are interwoven, right? But that one place that I noticed and recognized the optimization was in, you know, being that person who does what they say they're going to do. It then became the filter that I was looking through things at to make sure I wasn't over committing, to make sure I was being very selective about what I was saying yes to and that it was aligned with the direction I wanted to be moving in,
• 28:08
  John Mitchell: RIght, right? Yeah, it really changes who you are spiritually, because just like you're saying, it affects your beliefs and who you are and your identity. And that's what's so powerful about it. You know, I remember way back when I put in my visualization that I don't lie, of course, you now, keep in mind this is one of those nuances you can't tell yourself to not, to not do something that's not the subconscious mind, and neuroistic programming doesn't allow that. So you can't say you're going to do or avoid a negative, but you can, you can restate it that I always tell the truth, and I see that play out all the time, because sometimes it would have been it's so much easier just to say a white lie, to move something along with somebody and not hurt their feelings. I'm like, you know, that's just not who I am. I, you know, let me just take about a nanosecond more and think about what I can say that is true and not take the easy route and and say a lie. And if, if, and you can program yourself to never lie, and it's a it's a good feeling,
• 29:23
  Kelly Hatfield: It is, and it's so funny, because you shared that with me, and that was one of the things that I did, too, because, again, being a reformed people pleaser, I never want to hurt people's feelings. So I would maybe tell you know, like say I was already had plans or something along, right, right? And it was just really something, and it didn't want to do. And so one of the things that I this was, like three years ago, that I implemented in my was that I never say yes in the moment. I will. I had a canned response, which is, you know, thank you so much for the invitation. Let me take a look at what I've got going on, and I'll. Circle back to let you know if I can attend, you know, or if that's something I can commit to or not. So I had a canned response when anybody asked me something, and then when I circled back with them, I was just really honest. Like, hey, after looking at what I've got going on, this isn't aligned with, you know, whatever. And also to just learning to that no can be a complete sentence, you know, where it's just like, you know? No, thank you. I really appreciate the invite, though,
• 30:24
  John Mitchell: Right? You know, I have evolved to where my response is, I don't like you and you know it's, I don't have that many friends, now that I think about it, yeah, I know, you know, I even to the point of saying thank you for the invitation, you know, I guess you know, if I really, you know, I probably do, do appreciate the invitation. So even though I may not like them or I don't want to do it, you know, I appreciate the invitation, but I don't know it's just, you know, I find it's it's cool, and I think this is something a lot of our audience will listen, will appreciate. You know, as we've talked about this number of times, this is really for people about 50 years old. Not that people younger can't embrace it. In fact, I'm totally impressed when people do, but when you get, you know, in your late 40s and 50s, you're getting way more aware of who you are and what makes you tick and who do you want to be, and when you have a methodology that all you got to do is just, you know, sit down and think through exactly who do I want to be and what's my identity, and then you plug that conscious mind stuff into your template and feed it to yourself every day. Then you know that repetition causes you to turn into exactly what you're wanting to be. It's pretty powerful, very powerful. So okay, well, here's our plan. So as we're rolling this, this through, now you've learned the science, and so next week, I'm going to give you the link to go to the algorithm to answer the 40, approximate 40 questions, and you'll see we have a template for if you're an entrepreneur. We have an entrepreneur a template for if you work for somebody. We also have one for, you know, students that are seniors in college and athletes, but that sort of separate and apart for all my university of texas stuff. But basically, that's what you're going to pick is, is I'm either an entrepreneur or I'm an employee. Then once you make the selection, you're going to answer, you know, 40 questions. Press button, boom, it's our life. GPS template is customized to your life, and you'll have to tweak it a little. It's like 95% done, but you tweak it a little. And then the next week, we're going to teach you how to how to use this and and one thing I might say finally is, as you're answering these 40 questions, some of them are really easy. I mean, some of them are, you know, one word answers, and some of them are much tougher. And one of the features we've we just realized we had to build into it a couple days ago, is that you got to give people the ability to save their answers because they're they're not going to necessarily knock it out in one setting, you know, so, but you'll see. And the beauty of this is the magic 36 are are going to be able to all do our methodology in three weeks and and I would like you guys to be the beta testers on this algorithm. So thank you for that. So I guess until next time, we'll see you.
• 34:09
  Kelly Hatfield: Thanks for listening today. If you've had your own aha moment from today's episode, send me or John an email. We'd love to share your epiphany with our audience. So email us at Kelly@thinkitbeit.com or John@thinkitbeit.com in the meantime, live the exceptional life you.