Latest / Silver FM 100.6 / If sex is painful, you have options

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If sex is painful, you have options · Silver FM 100.6

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Attention A PSA from Shortwave NPR Science podcast, You need
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: to be paid more attention to your poop.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I really do think that this deep stigma we have
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: about talking about pooping is tied to these early onset
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: collorrectal cancer cases.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: What to watch out for and how did decode the
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: secret messages hidden in your poop? On Shortwave listen on
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  Speaker 1: the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts.
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: Is painful sex normal?
• 0:25
  Speaker 4: It's never normal, but there are times in life when
• 0:28
  Speaker 4: it is more common. But painful sex is always a
• 0:32
  Speaker 4: sign that there is something going on that needs more attention.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: Hey, it's Mary Al. You're listening to Life Kit and
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: you just heard a little bit from a conversation that
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: reporter Andy Tagle had with Janelle Frederick. She's a pelvic
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: full or physical therapist who specializes in care for painful sex.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: And she says, there are a lot of reasons why
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: you might be hurting, stress, menopause, childbirth.
• 0:57
  Speaker 4: But we should not be saying prolonged pain with intercourse
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: or with any type of intimacy. Even an arousal can
• 1:04
  Speaker 4: sometimes be painful, and a lot of people have pain
• 1:07
  Speaker 4: after sex too. All of those things are not normal,
• 1:11
  Speaker 4: even on your first time. So this is definitely a
• 1:14
  Speaker 4: discussion that we need to start having more and more often,
• 1:18
  Speaker 4: because there's millions of couples and women and people living
• 1:22
  Speaker 4: with the pain because of either shame or they think
• 1:25
  Speaker 4: that it is normal.
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: Of course, this is a hard topic for a lot
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: of us to talk about.
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: You know, I think because we are people who typically
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: assume sex is just perfect and normal. We grow up
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: seeing videos of people coming home from a day and
• 1:45
  Speaker 4: getting thrown against the wall and you just like rip
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: their pants off and they're having sex. You don't see
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: sexual dysfunction normalized in society, and while it is a
• 1:55
  Speaker 4: really common problem, we don't see it talked about. A
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: lot of people feel guilty even though it's not your fault.
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: It's not one's fault. This is a medical condition, just
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: like any other condition like endometriosis, are fibroids, are you know, menopause.
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: It happens, and there is help and there's no shame.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: On this episode of Life Kit, what to do when
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: sex is painful, Andy and Janelle talk about how to
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: communicate with your sex partners, when to see a doctor
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: or PT, and what exercises you can try. At home
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: to relieve the pain.
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: Take away one. Don't suffer in silence. Sex should not
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: be painful, not just before or during or after penetration.
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: So if you're experiencing stinging upon entry or aching pain
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: in the moment or cramping afterwards, your body is trying
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: to tell you something and you need to speak up
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: about it. For people who have a hard time talking
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: about this topic with their partner, do you have any
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: helpful starters for us?
• 3:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I would say definitely bringing it up outside of
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: the actual act. I think people are more inclined to
• 3:16
  Speaker 4: hear and process when those sexual hormones are not raging.
• 3:21
  Speaker 4: And so having a conversation while cuddling in bed, or
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: while going on a walk or you know, on a
• 3:29
  Speaker 4: long commute, you know, saying hey, is it okay if
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: we talk about intimacy at this time? So it's like
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: a planned conversation where you're saying, you know, after dinner tonight,
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: I want to tell you a bit more about intimacy
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: and how I've been feeling, and then letting them know,
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: you know, I love being intimate with you. If you do,
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: don't lie, if you do love being intimate with them,
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: letting them know, I've been feeling pain that is making
• 3:59
  Speaker 4: it difficult for me to enjoy the moment. You can
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: even be a little bit more descriptive. It feels like
• 4:03
  Speaker 4: sharp pain or I feel burning during penetration and I
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: haven't been able to forget about it, or I haven't
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: been able to breathe through it, or whatever. And I
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: want to know if we can explore some other options
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: while I start working on this, or while I seek
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: support for this, because it's making it difficult for me
• 4:23
  Speaker 4: to enjoy intimacy, and I don't want to give up intimacy.
• 4:27
  Speaker 4: So I think that's a good way to put it.
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: If you do want to remain intimate with this person,
• 4:34
  Speaker 4: but you're also acknowledging your body and the needs that
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: your body has. Your partner for sure needs to know
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: about it.
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: It sounds like any other starting out off and with
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: any other conversation you might have as a couple. You know,
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: you don't want to have a hard money conversation when
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: you're in the middle of paying your bills. You don't
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: want to have a hard parenting conversation when your kid
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: is having a tantrum.
• 4:56
  Speaker 4: Exactly. I one hundred percent agree, because you want the
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: other person to have the highest likelihood of actually being
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: a receptive and also you want to have that space too.
• 5:09
  Speaker 4: You want to be in a clear frame of mind.
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: And I think during sex you may feel a pressure
• 5:14
  Speaker 4: to like, oh, I want to please them because it's
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: already started, it's hot and steaming. But when you're having
• 5:20
  Speaker 4: a conversation and sex is not actively happening, you can
• 5:24
  Speaker 4: think more clearly. I would even suggest even asking your partner,
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: how do you think we can work through this? You're
• 5:30
  Speaker 4: giving your partner an opportunity to join you on that
• 5:34
  Speaker 4: healing path and not feel like this is something you
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: have to fix all alone. This is your fault, you're
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: messing up the relationship, but this is something that you
• 5:42
  Speaker 4: tackle together.
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: On that note, if not everyone has a partner, if
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: you have, if you're dating, if you have a new
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: sexual partner, what does that conversation sound like? You know,
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: I feel like that might be irracking for someone. How
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: do you start that?
• 5:55
  Speaker 5: So?
• 5:55
  Speaker 4: I think to me, timing is most important for that.
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: I personally wouldn't bring it up on the first day.
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: I want to be like, hey, my name is Janelle,
• 6:06
  Speaker 4: and I can't have penetration. My name is Janelle and
• 6:10
  Speaker 4: sex hurts who bad? Like, I wouldn't bring it up
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: on day one because the same way they're not going
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: to bring up their childhood traumas on day one. You know,
• 6:19
  Speaker 4: we're not bringing our heaviest things to the table first thing.
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: So I think, like first establishing, does this person seem
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: like a respectful person? Do they respect me? Do they
• 6:30
  Speaker 4: feel genuinely interested in getting to know me? But I
• 6:34
  Speaker 4: would say, as you feel it moving towards a more
• 6:37
  Speaker 4: physical nature, that I would bring up. Hey, I want
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: to let you know that I do struggle with public
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: pain and how that impacts me is it makes it
• 6:49
  Speaker 4: very painful for me to experience insertion. And I think
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: it's important to zoom out and say, Okay, yes I'm
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: having pain during sex, but bigger than that, I have
• 7:01
  Speaker 4: pain in my pelvis. It's not just the sex itself.
• 7:05
  Speaker 4: And I think if we frame it that way, when
• 7:07
  Speaker 4: we're talking to our partners, I carry pelvic pain and
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: maybe this shows up with pelvic exams, or maybe if
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: I sit for a long time, I have pelvic pain.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: Also when I have intercourse, I feel burning, sharp pain,
• 7:23
  Speaker 4: or whatever it is you're feeling. So that your partner understands, No,
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: it's not just you being scared of sex or needing
• 7:31
  Speaker 4: a ton of time with sex or whatever they think
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: it is. This is a medical condition that is impacting
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: my sex life. And be honest with where you are
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: in that healing journey. So I think most partners want
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: to know that this is something you're working through. If
• 7:47
  Speaker 4: they're not the person for you, then you move on.
• 7:49
  Speaker 4: There are so many people again who are willing to
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: walk with you on this journey of life, which includes
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: medical issues.
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: And to be clear, experiencing persistent or recurring pain during
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: sexual intercourse is a medical issue. There's even a medical
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: term for it, dys perunia. It's a condition that can
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: affect any sexually active person because we all have a
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: pelvic floor, but it's most common in women or people
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: with volve US. It's hard to say exactly how common.
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: One recent report said anywhere from eight to fifty six
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: percent a woman and an unknown number of gender expansive
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: people have suffered from disperunia at some point in their lifetime.
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: Another report says three out of four women will experience
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: pain during sex at some point in their lives. The
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: good news it's a condition that's often very treatable, if
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: not fully solvable, for a lot of people. But it
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: can also be a bit hard to pin down because.
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: There are multiple medical conditions that can cause painful.
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: And unsurprisingly, the cause of your pain will determine the
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: best way forward. More Life Kit after the Break.
• 9:13
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  Speaker 7: Are We Doomed looks at big problems nobody would rationally
• 10:05
  Speaker 7: want nuclear war.
• 10:06
  Speaker 8: That's not quite perrect.
• 10:09
  Speaker 7: How can we add friction?
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: Put the launch codes inside somebody's chest cavity and.
• 10:14
  Speaker 5: You have to kill them to get them out?
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• 10:27
  Speaker 3: Take away two. Pain during sex can come from a
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: lot of different places, and so can the corresponding treatment.
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: Top recommendation here. Set up an appointment with your primary
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: care provider or your OBGIN to get a diagnosis, especially
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: if you're experiencing things like bleeding, new or worsening pain
• 10:46
  Speaker 3: during intercourse, or other irregularities like abnormal discharge lesions on
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: your genitals or irregular periods. At your visit, your doctor
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: might ask you where you're experiencing pain and how often
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: with pain feels like, and how long you've been dealing
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: with it for, and based on those answers, they might
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: ask to perform a pelvic or rectual exam, collect samples
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: of bodily fluids for testing, or do something like a
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: trans vaginal ultrasound.
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: But we can also try and sort of take things
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: off of the list that we can roll.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: Out because some root causes are easier to spot and
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: easier to fix than others. Sometimes the solution could be
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: as simple as avoiding certain sexual positions, for example, or
• 11:32
  Speaker 3: if you suffer from pain upon entry, it's possible you
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: might just need to use more lubrication. But it's also
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: possible you have an underlying condition that's causing that vaginal dryness.
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: We want to look at hormones. So, am I going
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: through menopause, or am I on medications or on birth
• 11:49
  Speaker 4: control that could be blocking how my body produces testosterone
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: and estrogen, which is really important for lubrication and sexual
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: function overall. So let's say you've been on birth control
• 12:00
  Speaker 4: for like fifteen years and you've noticed that sex is painful.
• 12:05
  Speaker 4: That is actually shown by research to contribute to painful sex,
• 12:09
  Speaker 4: So we can consider exploring other options that may allow
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: your bodies to produce its natural level of sex hormones.
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: So hormones is a big one that could potentially be
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: leading to painful sex if there's a depletion, okay, and
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: for menopause, we would want to get on some hormonal support.
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: For others, insertion might be so painful it's not even possible.
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: There are a handful of different conditions that are commonly
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: at work in that scenario. One is called vaginismus. In
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: this case, the muscles around the vagina involuntarily contract or spasm.
• 12:46
  Speaker 4: Vaginesmus is a condition that can prevent all types of insertion,
• 12:49
  Speaker 4: not just intercourse, but public exams, tampons, finger insertion, anything
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: that you would typically need vaginal insertion for. Vaginestmus can
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: cause severe muscle tension and tightness and pain that can
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: make insertions so painful and obviously relationships and intimacy as well.
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: The next is called volvidinia or chronic vulva pain.
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: Which is like the burning, the stinging, the pain on
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: the outside either the opening, the glitters, or even the
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: labia can get painful.
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: And a final common category is infections like UTIs East
• 13:24
  Speaker 3: infections or sexually transmitted infections. For all of these there's
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: likely a corresponding medicine, and some of those might be
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: quick fixes.
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: So medications that can relax the muscles, medications that can
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: sort of calm the nerves from driving like that sharp
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: shooting pain. So your doctor would help you through figuring
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: out what would be appropriate.
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: If you're dealing with deep pain or pain after the fact,
• 13:49
  Speaker 3: that could potentially be related to other bodily systems or
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: other underlying conditions.
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: So if you're dealing with painful sex and you know
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: that you have severe endometriosis, are fibril are something going
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: on with your servix maybe in an abnormal pap smear,
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: then we want to make sure are we taking care
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: of that problem.
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: If none of these things sound familiar, it's possible the
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: fix you're looking for is in the brain body connection.
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: Category mental health. So let's say you're just going through
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: a really tough time and you're depressed. Depression can contribute
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: to pelvic floor at tension anxiety. If you have been
• 14:27
  Speaker 4: abused sexually, that risk goes up significantly for painful sex
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: and or vaginousness. If there's been trauma or just really
• 14:39
  Speaker 4: hard transitions in your life that haven't really been addressed
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: or processed, then mental health alone literally could be driving
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: someone's pelvic pain.
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: In this case, the right treatment might look like seeking
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: out a therapist or counselor to work through the emotional
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: side in addition to someone like Janelle who can provide
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: physical support to your pain aka palvic floor.
• 15:00
  Speaker 4: So a very non invasive option where we go in
• 15:03
  Speaker 4: we start retraining that pelvic floor. We're reducing pain. We're
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: showing you how to breathe, We're showing you how to
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: actually relax your muscles and not tighten them. Public floor
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: physical therapy is definitely an option that should be explored
• 15:17
  Speaker 4: more whenever pain is happening with sex because there's high
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: rates of success with it and it's such a non
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: invasive option for care.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: After the break. How pelvic floor therapy practices can help
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: reduce pain in your sex life.
• 15:37
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• 16:01
  Speaker 3: You're listening to Life Kit and it's time for takeaway three.
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: If your sex life's a pain, it's probably not a
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: bad idea to pay more attention to your pelvic floor.
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: So when someone gets to a public floor pete, what
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: are some of the common treatments?
• 16:14
  Speaker 4: What can you expect sure. So first thing is it's
• 16:18
  Speaker 4: gonna be like a long conversation. You're gonna get asked
• 16:21
  Speaker 4: the most questions you've ever had about your poop, your pee,
• 16:24
  Speaker 4: your sex life, your pelvis in general. It's not gonna
• 16:27
  Speaker 4: be just sex because the muscles that help support your
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: pelvists deal with more than just sex. So they're gonna
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: gather your information and your medical history, what you're dealing with,
• 16:36
  Speaker 4: and what your goals are. And then you can expect
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: an examination. So this may actually include an internal pelvic
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: floor muscle exam. Before they get to that internal, they'll
• 16:47
  Speaker 4: look at your posture. They may check your hip strength,
• 16:50
  Speaker 4: they may look at your core muscles, they may look
• 16:54
  Speaker 4: at your sacrement, your low back. So they'll be screening
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: the muscles, the ligaments, the tissues that enter with your
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: pelic floor. And then you may lay on a table
• 17:03
  Speaker 4: very similar to how you do when you go to
• 17:05
  Speaker 4: see and oba gun. So you'll get on the table.
• 17:08
  Speaker 4: Obviously they'll glove up a finger and this is all
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: only with consent, and it's with forewarning if you agree
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: to it. It is an internal peblic floor muscle exam,
• 17:17
  Speaker 4: so they're actually assessing the muscles internally to see how
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: do these muscles feel. Do they feel stiff or guarded
• 17:27
  Speaker 4: or do they feel lax and loose? Do they feel weak?
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: So they do the testing of strength, endurance, coordination. Can
• 17:34
  Speaker 4: you coordinate your peblic floor contraction with your breath? Do
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: you know how to push out correctly like for pooping
• 17:41
  Speaker 4: or giving birth, And they'll be able to feel where
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: your pain is coming from. Essentially, after that initial assessment,
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: then we start thinking through intervention. So we're gonna use
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: movement and exercises, so we call it therapy to exercises.
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: We're going to use manual therapy to not just test
• 18:00
  Speaker 4: the muscles, but now we're going to be releasing them.
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: So that may look like trigger point release with a finger,
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: they may look like massage, external massage. It could also
• 18:12
  Speaker 4: be like neuromuscular education, so things like your posture are
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: even bio feedback. So those are i would say, the
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: primary interventions that we use.
• 18:23
  Speaker 3: So if you've spotted any signs of pelvic floor dysfunction
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: like pandering sex of course, also problems with urination, chronic constipation,
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: needing to rush to the bathroom or going very often,
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: and this dysfunction is fairly likely. By the way, at
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: least one in three women will experience a pelvic floor
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: disorder in her lifetime. There are pelvic health tools you
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: can use at home, like vaginal dilators. Those slowly stretch
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: the pelvic floor muscles and desensitize the vaginal canal to
• 19:00
  Speaker 3: reduce pain. One aspect of Janelle's work is helping patients
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: with things like veginismus use dilators for remote physical therapy. Jennell,
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: if you're going through treatment with say a public poor therapist,
• 19:13
  Speaker 3: how long before you can expect to see relief? Is
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: this something you'll be dealing with forever? Is it something
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: you know? Will everyone? Will everyone see a solution?
• 19:22
  Speaker 4: It depends. Oh gosh, so that's the answer we all hate,
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: but it's very true. So in our practice, we work
• 19:31
  Speaker 4: with a lot of women who have already gone to
• 19:33
  Speaker 4: public flore physical therapy. It may have helped them somewhat,
• 19:37
  Speaker 4: but they are not have been paying free sex. So
• 19:40
  Speaker 4: you could go to therapy and it takes six months
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: for someone else, it takes a year. I will say,
• 19:48
  Speaker 4: when the care is coming from an expert that treats
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: this problem on a regular basis, I would be looking
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: at a three to four month timeframe where there should
• 19:58
  Speaker 4: be a significant improvement our programs, our shortest programs are
• 20:04
  Speaker 4: eight weeks. So some people are better in eight weeks.
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: You know, that doesn't happen for everyone. But two to
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: four months. This is not like we're not trying to
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: cure cancer here, we're trying to help your body do
• 20:15
  Speaker 4: what it already wants to do. Like sex is not
• 20:17
  Speaker 4: this foreign concept, right, So two to four months of
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: time we should be seeing a considerable improvement. If not,
• 20:26
  Speaker 4: you know, for resolution with an.
• 20:29
  Speaker 3: Expert, okay, really good to know, and it could.
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: Take longer, and I don't I don't want to make
• 20:33
  Speaker 4: it seem like it can't take longer. Well, if someone
• 20:36
  Speaker 4: has multiple problems they're dealing with, or if they're just
• 20:38
  Speaker 4: going through really hard time multiple mental health issues, or
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: you travel a lot for work and so you have
• 20:43
  Speaker 4: to reschedule. There's so many things that can contribute, but
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: regular care that's at least once a week. I do
• 20:49
  Speaker 4: think two to four months of care should be enough
• 20:52
  Speaker 4: to help someone at least eighty percent, you know, in
• 20:55
  Speaker 4: terms of improvement.
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: So take away four stretch your pelvic floor muscles. Some
• 21:02
  Speaker 3: pelvic floor PETA tools will be specific to certain conditions,
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: but then there are a few Janelle says I.
• 21:10
  Speaker 4: Think could help almost anyone with pelic pain, pelic tightness,
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: or sexual pain. Child's pose is a very very good one.
• 21:21
  Speaker 4: It opens the pelvic floor and when you're breathing deeply
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: through your belly, it lengthens the pelic floor, so you
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: actually can create more space in your vagina, and obviously
• 21:32
  Speaker 4: that's helpful for sex just by being in that position
• 21:35
  Speaker 4: in deep breathing. So Child's pose. Another good one is
• 21:38
  Speaker 4: happy baby. Lay on your back, hug your knees towards
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: your chest and your shoulders, open your legs. That is
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: a really really good one. You're gonna feel like your
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: vagina is just open to the air, so you should
• 21:51
  Speaker 4: get a nice breeze through the pelvic floor area. Yeah,
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: so that's another good one. And then literally just diaformatica.
• 22:01
  Speaker 4: This is sort of indirect with the pelc floor more
• 22:04
  Speaker 4: targeting your nervous system. So almost everyone who struggles with
• 22:08
  Speaker 4: painful sex has anxiety, or they get nervous before sex,
• 22:13
  Speaker 4: or maybe they just feel like their body can't relax,
• 22:16
  Speaker 4: and so deep breathing. You can lay on your back,
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: can lay on your bed on a yoga mat, put
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: your hands on top of your belly, and when you
• 22:24
  Speaker 4: breathe in, try to slow your breath down and allow
• 22:28
  Speaker 4: your belly to rise underneath your hand and also on
• 22:32
  Speaker 4: the side of your ribcage. So if you think of
• 22:35
  Speaker 4: your belly like a balloon, it should be expanding everywhere,
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: the front, the back, even the bottom which is the
• 22:41
  Speaker 4: pelvic floor. Everything should be expanding as you breathe in
• 22:44
  Speaker 4: and then slowly exhaling. Just doing that for five minutes
• 22:48
  Speaker 4: can help calm your nervous system and turn on rest
• 22:53
  Speaker 4: and digest, which is what we need for pleasure and sex.
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: We can't be in fight or flight and expect to
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: have pain sex, are even enjoyable sex.
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: Janelle Frederick, the Vagina Rehab Doctor, thank you so much
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: for your time. Any final thoughts, anything I missed.
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: No, I just want everyone to like have buttery scrumptious
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: sex and to actually look forward to it and not
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: dread it. And you know everyone desires to be happy
• 23:18
  Speaker 4: and have fun in their sex lives, so get the
• 23:21
  Speaker 4: help that you need. And I hope that this episode
• 23:24
  Speaker 4: was educational and helpful for everyone listening.
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: It really was, and I am the first I'm first
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: person in line. There absolutely buttery and scrumpcious. Yes, all right,
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: let's recap. Take Away one, Sex should not be painful before, during,
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: or after penetration. Sensations like stinging, aching, cramping are all
• 23:49
  Speaker 3: signals from your body that something is wrong or needs
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: to change. Listen to it, talk to your partner and
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: your healthcare provider about it. Because take Away two, pain
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: during sex, or a condition known as dysperonia, can come
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: from a lot of different places. In many cases, it's treatable,
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: even fixable, but you have to first understand the true
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: source of the problem. Better lubrication isn't going to solve
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: and demetriosis, for instance, so start with your primary care
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: provider or an obgyn. Take Away three that said, no
• 24:24
  Speaker 3: matter your specific ailment, it's never a bad idea to
• 24:28
  Speaker 3: give a little more love to your pelvic floor. At
• 24:31
  Speaker 3: least one in three women will experience a pelvic floor
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: disorder at some point in their lifetime, and a healthy
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: pelvic floor doesn't only contribute to a healthy sex life.
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: It also sustains bladder and bowbel control and helps stabilize
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: your core overall. So finally take away four. Stretch your
• 24:49
  Speaker 3: pelvic floor muscles regularly. It's easy to start. Just go
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: on ahead, add a child's post to your nightly routine.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: That was reporter Andy Tagel talking to pelvic floor physical
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: therapist Janelle Frederick. And that's our show. If you love
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: Life Kit and you want even more, follow us on
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: Instagram at NPR Lifekit. There you'll find videos featuring some
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: of our favorite tips. You can find those by following
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: at NPR Lifekit. This episode of Life Kit was produced
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: by Claire Maurie Schneider. Our digital editor is Malica Gharib,
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: and our visuals editor is c J. Rikalan. Megan Kane
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: is our senior supervising editor, and Lauren Gonzalez is our
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: executive producer. Our production team also includes Margaret Serino and
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Sylvie Douglas. Engineering support comes from Tiffany Vera Castro. Fact
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: checking by Andrea Lopes Crusado. I'm Mariel Sagara. Thanks for listening.
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