Latest / On Deathcare / Stress, Standards, and Cultural Shifts

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Stress, Standards, and Cultural Shifts · On Deathcare

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, I am Tony Russo from On Deathcare,
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_00: and this is The Rest, your weekly rundown of news from around funeral service.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: Tons of great stuff this week, lots of quick hit stories.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: Longer story that I want to talk about.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: But before we get to that,
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: I want to take this opportunity,
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: as always, to thank my paid subscribers that make all of this work possible.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you're interested in becoming a subscriber paid or not,
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: you can do that by going to ondeathcare.com and clicking on subscribe.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: There you'll have the opportunity to subscribe for anything from zero dollars
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: a month All right, folks, let's get into it.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_00: I hope to have a lot more on this later on in the week.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: I've got some interviews arranged to talk about it.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: But the vice president of operations at Hudson Funeral Home in Detroit,
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: Joseph Hudson Jr.,
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: died by suicide in the middle of a scandal,
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: a body switching allegations that his funeral home was facing.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: This is a story,
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: actually,
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't write the,
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't really follow the body switching because it was just one of those.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: It's funny how inured
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: you can get to it, but it was the case of they cremated the wrong woman.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: There were two people that were sent at the same time, and there was a mistake.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't want to,
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: and it wouldn't be appropriate to draw a direct line from the mistake to the death,
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: but it is...
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: An opportunity,
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: I guess,
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: to remind everybody about,
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: that I don't think funeral directors always appreciate the amount of stress they're
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: under.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: It's almost like the frog boiling in the water kind of thing.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like you just after years and years and years of,
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: stress of running a business,
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: the stress of dealing with grieving families, the stress of bizarre hours.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, even if you're Only working,
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: a 40 or 50 hour week,
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: the relentlessness of it, you know, can and does get to people in different ways.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: And this is a good opportunity for everybody to do a little bit of a self check
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: and see how much Tension you've let built up without knowing it because this is just
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: a terrible thing and unfortunately not super rare.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: Depression in funeral directors is obviously something that we've discussed
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: a thousand times and we'll discuss it a thousand more.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: Like I said,
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: I think I'll have something more useful coming out later on in the week,
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: but I wanted to bring your attention to it As soon as possible,
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: make sure you're taking your emotional and psychological temperature as often
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: as is reasonable and paying attention to it and,
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: paying attention to your stress levels,
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_00: continuing to incorporate more without any outlet at all can sneak up on anybody.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: So there's a link to the developing coverage of this story in the show notes.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: But more important,
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: I just wanted to,
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: You don't want to make the mental health pitch constantly because
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: then people stop listening to it, I worry.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: But then I also worry that,
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: you don't make enough of a deal out of it and you miss the one person
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: that you should.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: So we're trying to kind of, I am trying to kind of
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Be gentle.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I hope that I am being,
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: but please,
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: if you're in a stressful, I mean, sorry, I know you're in a stressful job.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_00: The question is,
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: if you're too used to the stress, you've got to find a way to be less used to it.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: Like being stressed out is something that should happen.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're not stressed out, then maybe you're burying stress in a way that isn't healthy.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: All right, anyway.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: Well, let's move on.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: And like I said, I'll have something more concrete out later on this week.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: I was going to say that I covered this story before, but I covered it in a different state.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: Same story, same lame NIMBY nonsense, different coast.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: So in California,
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: I reported on the attempts to stop a Sikh crematory from opening because
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: of EPA rules that The crematory easily passed,
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: and now they're doing the same thing in Lexington,
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: Massachusetts,
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: where there's a significant Sikh, Jain,
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: Hindu, and Buddhist population that wants to make use of a specialized crematory.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: And you know,
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: they have a different ritual that requires a little bit of a different setup for
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: the crematory.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: And the nearest one currently is, according to the reporting, in Connecticut.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: And everyone is making the trip to Connecticut.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: And the community wanted to build one to put in the Westview Cemetery to be able to, you know...
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, the people are up in arms.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: And one of the things that I always like to look for when you're dealing with
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: a real dumb, dumb, dumb argument is the form of it.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: That they had in Lexington.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_00: They've decided to say that the business plan is bad.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: And this is really common.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: Like no one ever shows up to a restaurant approval and says,
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: oh, are you sure this restaurant will succeed?
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: Because if it's not going to succeed, we shouldn't let it open.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: But that's a huge one for crematories.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like, are they going to have enough business?
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: Don't we already have enough crematories?
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_00: You have enough restaurants in Lexington and you'll open three more pizza places
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: before I finish this sentence.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: So.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: We'll leave that there.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: So anyway, they have succeeded in slowing down the process.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: We do not know if it'll go through.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: I hope it'll go through and I'll continue to follow it as it goes along.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: And it's something that I mention every time, but I do want to continue to hammer it home.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: Cremation is not necessarily just for cheap people.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: Who don't want to pay for a real funeral.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: There are religions that require it.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know,
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: I say all the time,
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: if it was a requirement of Christianity,
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: there would be very few objections over the same lame things that they throw up.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: Because, you know, honestly, we also, you know, as an industry, I think that the funeral...
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: Industry rather didn't do what it could have done
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: to make cremation seem like it wasn't a dirty process for 30 years.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: And now everybody's kind of paying that price.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: So hopefully this will work out.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_00: I think it will for them.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: And there is a link to the reporting in the show notes.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't want to have to start another another podcast
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: about reality television show funeral directors.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: But I did want to point out that in Australia there is a funeral director
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: who is also on a reality show, Angus and Simon.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: Our friends, Simon, I believe, is the funeral director.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: They're on a show called My Kitchen Rules,
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: which is about, I know, cooking in your kitchen, one expects.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: I just think that it's neat that,
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, it seems like a wave of funeral directors stepping out into less...
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: Behind the scenes roles.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it's awesome.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's fantastic.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: I did a story this week on Dan Madden.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: You may know him as Dan the Funeral Man and his trip to Fashion Week.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: I'll put a link to that in the show notes as well.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: It's time to get out in front of the camera.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not the only one who says it, but I have been saying it for a long time.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you're...
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: Have the opportunity to show the community your face while you're not at a funeral
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: or at a Rotarian breakfast.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: Probably worth it.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: It's definitely worth it for your business.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: So anyway, link to this in the show notes.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: It's just a fun story.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know if you can watch My Kitchen Rules,
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: but I know we have some Australian listeners.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, we have several.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: We have a lot of Australian listeners.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: So hello to my Australian listeners, our Australian listeners.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I Yeah,
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_00: if you want to tell me how things are going on My Kitchen Rules,
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: just shoot me a note.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: I can back you up after Spencer Hake does his Joe Vanilla report.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: We can do the My Kitchen Rules update.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, there's a link to the story in the show notes.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: I believe I mentioned this movie when it was first announced
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: and now it has premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to remind you that it could eventually be a movie.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: Right now it's called Back in Black and it stars Christopher Walken as a funeral director.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: Who's having trouble with his business because people have stopped dying
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_00: and he lives in one of these,
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: you know, age maxing kind of communities and they don't die anymore.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: So his business is in real trouble.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: According to the I from what I get from the description,
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: it looks like his granddaughter tries to help him out
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: by making more accidents occur.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: Let's let's put it that way.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: This is Christopher Walken's second funeral director.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: I
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: think it will probably be fun to watch, especially if you're a funeral director.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know,
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_00: it's just it takes it takes the,
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_00: you know, the absurdity of all of the life extending measures.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_00: That people are already taking and then extends it out into how ridiculous it can actually get.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_00: So anyway, there's a link to the video and some of the press in the show notes.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_00: This is a strange story that I've reached out to the funeral home on.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: They haven't reached back out to me, and they may not, and I wouldn't blame them.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: But a funeral home,
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: Dorsey Funeral Home and Cremations in Nebraska,
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: was given two years probation for cremating...
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: Bodies without a license.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: And that's a tough headline, right?
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: But farther down,
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_00: it looks like they had cremated indigence as part of a test of their crematory
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: before their license was issued,
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_00: which doesn't make it better,
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_00: but it doesn't make it like they were having this out of the back of a truck kind
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: of cremation business.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm wondering how that happened.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_00: The person who owns the funeral home is not a funeral director.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, it's funny.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: I just did this interview,
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_00: I believe the interview I just did with Mike Miller,
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: which will be out later on this week.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: We talked about this very thing, how people...
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_00: You know,
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: don't know how important it is to have a funeral director,
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: even if you're a business person who's who's running a direct cremation
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_00: or direct acclimation facility for for reasons like this.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you know, you think that, you know.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: Everything's ready to go.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: You're literally just waiting for the license in the mail.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_00: So you start operating.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: That is, of course, against the law and subject to all sorts of fines and as it should be.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: But it's not nefarious.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why I'd like to at least make sure that this wasn't trying to get away
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: with something as opposed to,
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: genuinely since the license was in the mail,
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: they thought they were OK kind of thing.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: So there's a link to the reporting as it is so far in the show notes.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: And last but not least,
• 13:02
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• 13:07
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• 13:10
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• 13:11
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• 13:16
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• 13:28
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• 13:32
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• 13:38
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• 13:52
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• 13:54
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• 14:00
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• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: All right, and that will do it for this time.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_00: On Deathcare has,
• 14:41
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• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: excuse me,
• 14:43
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• 14:48
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• 14:49
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• 14:51
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• 14:55
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• 15:00
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• 15:18
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