Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 3 - Episode 91 - The lies we tell ourselves first!

Transcript

Season 3 - Episode 91 - The lies we tell ourselves first! · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

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  Welcome to the Good Morning From the Chicken Coop Podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and mastermind set
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  coach. Filled with inspiration,
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  distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
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  cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
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  of yourself you could ever imagine.
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  Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
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  her chicken coop along with all her chickens.
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  Hey everybody, good morning from the chicken coop.
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  So today I would like to talk to you about lying to yourself.
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  So this subject comes up often in my coaching practice with
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  people and it it's it's very interesting because I don't
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  think most of us intend to lie to ourselves and I don't think
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  most of us realize how conditioned we are to just do it
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  so easily and so quickly. So I It's such a valid
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  conversation to have, because if we're not honest with ourselves,
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  then how the heck can we ever be honest about anything else or
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  with anybody else? And I think we have become
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  anesthetized to the effects of lying to yourself on a core
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  level. It just seems normal now.
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  It doesn't it doesn't seem like you're lying to yourself.
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  So it it it's worth us doing a dive into it because there's
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  nothing more difficult than getting past lying to yourself
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  and I I would like to preface this by saying this is a
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  practice, so you have to be patient with yourself and you
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  have to be willing to ask yourself, am I lying to myself
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  right now? Am I telling the truth?
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  Is this really how I feel? Or am I?
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  Am I, you know, just skirting around it so I don't have to
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  deal with it? Because that's what most of it
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  comes from us not wanting to deal with things.
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  So let me give you a simple example.
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  You run into someone and you're, let's say you're shopping at
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  Walmart and you run into somebody you haven't seen in a
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  while and they say, oh, I would love to get together and have
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  lunch with you. And you're like, absolutely,
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  let's make plans And you know in the back of your head you don't
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  want to have lunch with this person.
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  You know that you, for whatever reason just have no interest in
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  doing that. But yet you say it because quote
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  UN quote, we don't want to hurt their feelings.
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  But that's lying to yourself. And I'm not saying you should go
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  and hurt their feelings, But what I'm saying is that's a
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  recognized point of knowing you're lying to yourself.
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  So where else do they show up? It's like when you're in your
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  home and you say I'm going to do the workout tomorrow, Let's say
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  you do say I'm going to work out tomorrow and you know you're not
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  going to want to get out of bed in the morning because you're
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  going to go to bed late or you've got something going on or
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  just habit you have created is saying you're going to start
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  tomorrow but you never do. Another big one is I'm not going
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  to eat any sugar. I hear this from clients all the
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  time. I'm not going to eat any sugar.
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  I'm going to do a complete and total, you know, stop of this.
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  No sugar, no gluten, no alcohol, whatever it might be.
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  And they know, they know that that is their solid intent.
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  They they believe that that they really, really want that.
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  But the want is not enough to get you there.
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  The want is never enough to get you there.
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  The want is just the beginning. And then before you know it,
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  you've lied to yourself because you're standing there in front
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  of your pantry and you're putting a cookie in your mouth
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  and you're saying, well, it's only one.
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  You look at the bag and you say, well, it's not that many
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  calories, but it's not about the calories, it's about what you're
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  telling yourself. So how can we rely on ourselves
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  if we know we don't tell ourselves the truth?
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  So it's imperative that this be something that we start to
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  change right away. So as a great exercise to do,
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  and I have clients do this all the time and it's not easy, but
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  it's very necessary. Just take inventory for the next
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  24 to 48 hours and see how many times you don't tell yourself
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  the truth. See how many times you are
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  skirting it. See how many times you have a
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  feeling you something comes out of your mouth and it's not
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  aligned with how you're feeling. You get that sick pit in your
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  stomach, like, gosh, I don't want to do that, or oh, I didn't
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  want to say that or oh, I didn't mean that.
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  It's an excellent way to measure it.
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  So give yourself the opportunity at least of understanding it
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  because once you start to understand it, you can fix it.
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  You can't fix what you don't understand.
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  So it's really important to just start the process there.
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  Start and see where am I doing this?
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  Where are the patterns showing up, What are the things that I
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  particularly lie about? Because if I if I can be really
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  clear, excuse me, if you can be really clear about it, then I
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  can fix it, I can stop the process.
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  But if you're not honest with yourself, you'll never get
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  there. So take the challenge, do the
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  little exercise, see what you come up with and then you can
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  start to change that and say, Nope, I can find a better way to
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  say this. I can find a better way around
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  this rather than being dishonest with myself.
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  And I I personally do it all the time where I'll say, listen, I
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  could tell you that that would work for me, but I just know
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  myself and I know I'm not going to want to end up going that
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  late or I know I'm not going to end up wanting to sit there and
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  go through that. So let's try a different
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  strategy. Let's find something else we can
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  do instead. And I promise you, it makes a
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  profoundly happier life for you. Which is the goal here, right?
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  That's the whole purpose of the goal of visiting the chicken
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  coop every morning is to figure out what has to happen for you
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  to thrive and be happy and have joy and just manifest the life
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  that you're looking for. So I will see you tomorrow, and
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  hopefully you find out some great things about yourself.
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  I'll talk to you soon.