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How to Heal Our Emotional Well-Being · RiseUp - Live Joy Your Way

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Today's episode is produced by my friends at Walk West.
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  SPEAKER_00: If you're looking to grow your brand and generate leads through podcast or video production, head over to walkwest.com.
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  SPEAKER_00: Okay, let's start the show.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: Rise up, live joy your way.
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  SPEAKER_01: From emotional intelligence through cognitive distortions, certified life and wellness coach Comedy Wood is on a mission to help people see the magnificence of their own unique human spirit.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: Through these small bites of self-visualization and self-confidence, you can have healthy relationships, success in business and career, and live the life you want to live.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_01: Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: Hi there and welcome to another episode of Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Whether it's morning, afternoon, or evening when you've decided to tune in, I just want to say thank you for taking some time out of your day to spend with me.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: And today's topic is about how we can go about healing ourselves emotionally and mentally.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: Most people have their own struggles, right?
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: Most of us have had either some past hurts or losses, some of us have had toxic relationships, many of us have self-limiting or false beliefs.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: There are those of us who have had uh work-related stress, relationship issues, uh suffering from stress, chronic stress, anxiety, depression.
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  SPEAKER_00: These are all part of the human experience, and it's part of common humanity.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: Many people have felt these things.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: Uh recently, something that's come up in my work is just working with people on the concept of shame and recognizing that shame is is different than a feeling.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: Shame is the unwitnessing of what we've gone through and how we carry shame with us.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: And when we do that, it can absolutely have a negative effect on how we see ourselves and then therefore can keep us from maybe living up to our greatest potential, our greatest human potential.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: And it when we think about it, it's because if we don't think that we're good enough, or we're carrying this story that we're unworthy, or that we don't deserve something, or we have those unresolved feelings about ourselves, and we're carrying that shame with us.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: That again, shame in this context is not just a feeling, but an unwitnessing of maybe an experience we've had, or just the message that we have internalized.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_00: What we're doing is we're actually keeping ourselves from living our into our true self.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: And so when we're talking about emotional healing, we're really talking about the process of recognizing, really naming and recognizing, becoming aware, allowing ourselves to process through and to integrate some of those emotions.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it is a form of unshaming those things, right?
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Because when we also think about trauma, it's about experiences that have not fully been processed.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: And so when we're really leaning into this concept of emotional healing, we're leaning into this idea of understanding ourselves on a deeper level.
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  SPEAKER_00: So it's not just about, okay, this is what this is, let's put a quick band-aid on it.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why I say, even in my work, the work takes takes time because we're not trying to put band-aid solutions on anything.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: And it's really important to recognize why emotional healing is so important and why giving yourself permission to understand yourself at that deeper level is so important because when you think, when you when you don't understand yourself on that deeper level, it's gonna have an effect on how you relate to others or how you even relate to yourself with the external world.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: So when you take that time to to understand yourself, to embrace your feelings, to treat yourself with self-compassion, it does increase your sense of well-being.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: And so when you learn your learn how to emotionally heal and learn how to become aware of the stories that you've been carrying with you and recognize what serves you and what doesn't, it allows you to understand also what might continue to trigger you and how you want to potentially work through that and what actions and commitments do you want to make to yourself in order to move yourself forward.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: So, one question that comes up for people is how do I even know that I I might be in need of something like this?
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so some of the things that we look at are, you know, those people who are feeling stuck in their life.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: They really can't put their finger on it, but they're like, I just don't feel like I'm moving forward.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: Or when we're find ourselves suffering from chronic anxiety or even depression, uh, when you find yourself maybe in a toxic relationship, that could be an indication that some emotional healing might need to take place.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: If you listen to yourself and recognize that you're being really critical and really harsh with yourself, if you are in a pattern of numbing your feelings, maybe through something like alcohol or other substances, or maybe food, or keeping yourself from eating.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: So you have disordered eating and you're trying to do that in order to numb your feelings.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: If you have difficulty coping with some loss or grief, or maybe you're noticing that you just seem to be angry and you can't process through that anger, those are indications that maybe some hailing might need to might need to occur.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um, the healing process, of course, looks different for different people.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_00: So when you're thinking about how to go through this process, it's not about finding the solution that worked for somebody else.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: It's about finding the one that works for you.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: So for some people, I know this for my clients, you know, some people journaling is a great tool for them, but for others, it's not.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: They just they they are not getting the same, the same results from journaling.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: So while journaling and mindfulness can be great, um, well, journaling can be a great tool.
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  SPEAKER_00: Mindfulness is a great tool because it brings you back to the present moment.
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  SPEAKER_00: It it's it's important for you to find the tools that work for you.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to go through some tips that I have, but it's ways that you can tell if you're starting to, if things are starting to work through for you, is when you find yourself um not afraid of your own feelings, for instance.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: When you find yourself starting to set boundaries and you're not as afraid to set them, when you recognize that you're talking to yourself in a different way, when you recognize that your resiliency seems to be increasing, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: You can bounce back from some adversity without getting totally caught up in it, or you don't find yourself going down the rabbit hole of your thoughts or feelings.
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  SPEAKER_00: Those just are indications that you are starting that and you're really on that that pathway to move through it.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: So some of the ways that you can you can really work through this emotional healing process, and I'm a true advocate of is to give yourself permission to ex to allow to have your feelings.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: So often we are taught that there's either no time for our feelings, we have to just keep going, and we don't give ourselves permission to feel the feelings we have.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, there's this idea that there's these positive emotions and these negative emotions, and it's really important to just recognize that these emotions are just information, they're just data packets giving us information.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: So allowing yourself to name your feelings and to and to process through them is really important.
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  SPEAKER_00: Practicing self-compassion, kindness over judgment, recognizing that other people have had similar situations, taking smaller steps.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes we try to make these big leaps and bounds, and instead it's recognizing that smaller steps will compound and to create larger changes.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_00: Be patient with yourself, be persistent with yourself, but be patient as well.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: Give yourself time.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's not you're not on anybody's timetable.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: You get to decide the process for yourself, which leans into this other idea of being gentle and forgiving to yourself.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: That's again self-compassion, but it's also give yourself permission to forgive if you are going through a process and you're starting to recognize that maybe you've acted in a way that you wouldn't have wanted to.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: Go give yourself permission to go through the self-forgiveness process.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: This, you know, we all oftentimes we'll hear about forgiveness and practicing forgiveness.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: And the one thing that I will say about forgiveness is yes, absolutely.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: I'll say a couple things about forgiveness.
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  SPEAKER_00: One, it is a release of an anchor for you.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's more for you than for and for the other person that you're forgiving.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's about releasing your attachment to whatever that situation is.
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  SPEAKER_00: However, I will also say that there is a concept of toxic forgiveness, which is when you feel like you have to forgive before you've had the opportunity to process through.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: So if we're talking about emotional healing, it's about giving yourself permission to get to that place where you are ready to forgive and accept that failure is both okay and natural.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: And we're gonna make mistakes.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: We're going to misstep.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: And it's about how can I learn from this and grow from this rather than looking at it as the end of something for you.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: Finding ways to heal yourself emotionally is so important because it really does help you again when you have that awareness.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_00: Now you have the you're basically taking your power back and finding yourself in a choice point of how you want to move forward and what the narrative is going to be for you as you move forward through life.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: If you'd like to talk about this or anything else by any me, but you know, but by all means, feel free to reach out to me at chatwithcomedy.com.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: And until next time, stay well.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for listening to Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_01: For more information, book a chat with comedy at www.chatwithcomedy.com.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_01: Or visit her website at www.comedywood.com.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_01: You can also find comedy on Facebook or Instagram.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: Username it's authentic me.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for listening.