Latest / Downshift With Tonnika / The Road from Mobile Mechanic to Shop Owner | Xavier Bowe - Ep 47

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The Road from Mobile Mechanic to Shop Owner | Xavier Bowe - Ep 47 · Downshift With Tonnika

• [Xavier Bowe] (0:00 - 0:04) Do I need some while I'm still a tech or do I focus more on the business? [Tonnika Haynes] (0:04 - 0:29) So you can do both, that's the thing. You're going to have to do both for the longest and as painful as it sounds, you're going to have to do both. You can take the technical classes, but you can take those when they're in your area or you can subscribe to someone like Scanner Danner. You're always learning, but if you don't know what to do with the money that you're making or how to make more money, then what's the point of having so many skills with going to work for somebody else? [Xavier Bowe] (0:29 - 0:32) Yeah, I can't work for anybody else. That's just not... [Tonnika Haynes] (0:32 - 0:33) So you need to turn yourself into a boss? [Xavier Bowe] (0:34 - 0:34) Yes. [Benjie Burris] (0:35 - 0:49) Welcome to Downshift with my sis, Tanika Haynes. We all know as shop owners, sometimes you got to slow down in order to speed up. And that's what this podcast is all about. It's time to downshift. [Tonnika Haynes] (0:55 - 0:57) You even know what we're talking about today? [Xavier Bowe] (0:58 - 0:59) Not really. [Tonnika Haynes] (0:59 - 1:10) I don't either. I don't either. That's why I like doing this. I just like having conversations with people. What do you like to be called? [Xavier Bowe] (1:12 - 1:15) I actually like to be called by my middle name, which is Xavier. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:16 - 1:18) I figured you were going to say that. [Xavier Bowe] (1:18 - 1:24) My parents called me that all my life. It wasn't until I went to work that I realized what my first name was. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:26 - 1:28) So you always thought your name was Xavier, not Michael? [Xavier Bowe] (1:28 - 1:31) I wouldn't answer to Michael because nobody called me Michael. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33 - 1:39) Yeah. So it's Xavier. We'll fix that. I'm going to try to remember that because I see on Facebook it says Michael all the time. You should change it. [Xavier Bowe] (1:42 - 2:02) The crazy thing is that when I started to work, I couldn't use my middle name even though I asked to because I'm from the Bahamas. We're from the British structure. So it's like your first name is your first name. They don't do what you feel like to be called. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:04 - 2:15) Oh, well, you're in America. You want to be called Xavier, you call Xavier. How about that? So relax. Let's find out who you are. You say you're from the Bahamas? [Xavier Bowe] (2:16 - 2:16) I am. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:17 - 2:19) That's cool. So how long have you been in the States? [Xavier Bowe] (2:20 - 2:21) 12 years. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:22 - 2:26) 12 years? Like what are you? Let me see. You are 35. [Xavier Bowe] (2:26 - 2:28) I'm not 35. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:28 - 2:29) What's your age? [Xavier Bowe] (2:30 - 2:31) I'm about to be 44. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:32 - 2:35) What? You know, black don't crack. We don't crack, man. We look good. [Xavier Bowe] (2:37 - 2:37) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:37 - 2:39) So how long have you been wrenching? [Xavier Bowe] (2:40 - 2:45) I've been, you know, my father's a mechanic. So I've been wrenching the majority of my life. [Tonnika Haynes] (2:48 - 2:49) Okay. Tell me more about that. [Xavier Bowe] (2:50 - 3:14) Well, I grew up, my father was a mechanic in the Bahamas. He came, he studied here in the U.S. in California. And he's been wrenching since he was a teenager. So it was his dream that his boys would be wrenching along with him. But that wasn't my desired path. At first, I decided I wanted to do culinary and then it just stuck with me. [Tonnika Haynes] (3:16 - 3:18) So can you cook? [Xavier Bowe] (3:18 - 3:20) I have a degree in culinary arts. [Tonnika Haynes] (3:21 - 3:23) I didn't ask you that, Xavier. I didn't ask you that. [Xavier Bowe] (3:23 - 3:29) I can cook. I can cook. I cooked actually. I cooked for a long time. For like 20 years, I cooked. [Tonnika Haynes] (3:30 - 3:34) Okay. So you're a woman's dream. You can cook and you can fix cars. [Xavier Bowe] (3:34 - 3:35) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (3:36 - 3:38) So you said you and your brothers, is it how many of you? [Xavier Bowe] (3:39 - 3:45) Right now, two of them passed away. So it's five of us. [Tonnika Haynes] (3:46 - 3:56) Whoa. So you said your dad thought his boys would always follow his footsteps. And any of your brothers, are they still mechanics as well? [Xavier Bowe] (3:56 - 4:00) The two that were mechanics were the ones that passed away besides myself. [Tonnika Haynes] (4:00 - 4:08) Okay. Cool. Cool. Cool. So do you have a mobile business or a brick and mortar? Tell me more about what you do. [Xavier Bowe] (4:08 - 4:10) I have a mobile business. [Tonnika Haynes] (4:11 - 4:12) Tell me a little bit about that. [Xavier Bowe] (4:13 - 4:33) So it was birthed out of, when I came here, I went to a technical college in Hollywood called Sheridan Tech. And after I graduated, found it hard to get hired. And so the only logical thing was to do it for yourself. And that's how it was. [Tonnika Haynes] (4:33 - 4:37) Why did you feel like you couldn't get hired? What was the pushback there? Do you know? [Xavier Bowe] (4:37 - 4:46) Well, the pushback was, I was an international student at the time, and it was just hard getting across that threshold. [Tonnika Haynes] (4:48 - 4:54) Yeah. So you just start mobile mechanic out of the trunk of your car? How did you find your customers? [Xavier Bowe] (4:56 - 5:12) The thing is, in South Florida, there's a small but large community of my fellow behemoths. And one call led to another, and I did a lot of work for the behemoths exporting cars to the Bahamas. [Tonnika Haynes] (5:14 - 5:16) Okay. So you built it up through community? [Xavier Bowe] (5:16 - 5:17) Yes. [Tonnika Haynes] (5:17 - 5:19) And you've had that how long again? I'm sorry. [Xavier Bowe] (5:21 - 5:21) 2016. [Tonnika Haynes] (5:23 - 5:31) Oh, okay. So 10 years, do you think that maybe you would consider brick and mortar or you just not built for that? [Xavier Bowe] (5:32 - 5:47) I would consider brick and mortar. I've been busting my brains to figure out how to get to that, either by buying or... But I haven't found the lever to turn to get to that. [Tonnika Haynes] (5:50 - 5:57) Do you think, what's holding you back? You just don't know how to get started? You don't know where to start? Or is it just in your head? [Xavier Bowe] (5:57 - 6:02) I think I'm just stuck in my head and the finance is like, how do I get there? [Tonnika Haynes] (6:04 - 6:16) Right. Right. So how... I mean, I don't try to be nosy, but how many customers do you have currently? Do you think you have enough clients to open a brick and mortar type store? [Xavier Bowe] (6:17 - 6:37) No. Like I said, it was basically my community of bohemians. And that was during the time just before a hurricane. And so it was like a lot of business and then businesses after COVID, things just fell off a cliff. [Tonnika Haynes] (6:39 - 6:41) And you were able to pick up from there? [Xavier Bowe] (6:42 - 7:28) Well, it's maintained itself, but I haven't turned the lever. The thing that I figured is that it's hard to wrench and sell at the same time. So I'm not sure if I'm able to sell at the same time. How do you sell the business and turn the wrench at the same time? Because some jobs you go and you think it's going to take 30 minutes and it turns into a nightmare. And so I may have had a job, like two to three jobs scheduled for the day. And then I have to push back because I'm stuck on a job. Because there's a very, very diverse community of us technicians here from Super Mario Diagnostics. He works with Autobahn. You have Richard Falco from CarQuest. [Tonnika Haynes] (7:29 - 7:39) So it's like we have- Yeah, I'm sitting here testing his wife, Chrissy, right now. She's ready to go get some Mexican food. So yeah, I know Rich. I know all the people that you're talking about. So you do have a great community. [Xavier Bowe] (7:40 - 7:40) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (7:42 - 7:48) So we just got to figure out how to get you in management mode if you really want to do it. Do you think you really want to do that? [Xavier Bowe] (7:48 - 8:03) I really, really, really want to get into management mode. So that's been the motive lately. I've been just racking my brain on how to turn that level because I don't want to. My dream was never to be the one turning the wrench forever. [Tonnika Haynes] (8:07 - 8:16) So first of all, you got to get the funds together. Then do you think you need to hire somebody under you? Is it just you? Do you have a team? [Xavier Bowe] (8:16 - 8:17) It's just me. [Tonnika Haynes] (8:17 - 8:18) Just someone that helps you? [Xavier Bowe] (8:18 - 8:19) It's just me. [Tonnika Haynes] (8:19 - 8:22) We got to have a team. Do you have a potential team member? [Xavier Bowe] (8:23 - 8:25) I don't. That's what I've been working on. [Tonnika Haynes] (8:26 - 8:28) Have you really been working on it? Come on, Jose. [Xavier Bowe] (8:28 - 8:29) I probably haven't. [Tonnika Haynes] (8:32 - 8:43) Because I see you. I mean, you got to make a move. You got to make a money move. I do. Okay. So you want to come hold your hand? [Xavier Bowe] (8:44 - 8:53) No, I don't want to be held. The thing is, I don't want my hand to be held. I just want to somebody to point me in the right direction so I know which way to go. [Tonnika Haynes] (8:55 - 8:59) It makes sense. Do you think you can afford coaching right now? [Xavier Bowe] (9:00 - 9:02) No. That's the issue. [Tonnika Haynes] (9:02 - 9:15) So I know that I see you on social media looking everywhere. I see you looking and commenting and being engaged. Have you ever taken any of Rick's free classes? [Xavier Bowe] (9:15 - 9:22) I tried, but every time I tried it, his calendar said it was full. Didn't have any availability. [Tonnika Haynes] (9:24 - 9:32) I'm going to hook you up. I'm going to do that. It's happening. I'm going to tell Rick, we're going to make sure that you know ahead of time so you have a spot. [Xavier Bowe] (9:35 - 9:44) When Josh recommended him, I automatically tried to jump on his calendar. He sent me the link, and every time I opened up the link, it was like there was no availability. [Tonnika Haynes] (9:45 - 10:02) Yeah. It's pretty busy. I mean, it's not small. I don't want to disrespect Rick because I love Rick. But it's not a big, big institution, but he is heavily sought out. So whatever I find, I'm going to start getting on your nerves. I'm making myself a note. [Xavier Bowe] (10:03 - 10:18) Are you not going to get on my nerves? I know it's me just trying to manifest being in the right company with the right people to help point you in the right direction. Sometimes ignorance is just the darkness that you can't see, and you just need somebody to strike a match. [Tonnika Haynes] (10:19 - 10:30) Right. So what have you learned? Because I do see you in the other social networks like ASOC and whatever. Is there anything in there that you've picked up and learned that you've implemented in your business? [Xavier Bowe] (10:33 - 10:49) I have learned. One of the things I've learned is to what I've been implementing is to not install customer supplied parts. That was a big change for me. [Tonnika Haynes] (10:50 - 10:53) How much pushback did you get from that though? [Xavier Bowe] (10:54 - 11:12) With my countrymen, a lot of pushback. So I lost a lot of business with people from my country because everybody is trying to nickel and dime you. So it's just with customers that are based here in the US, I didn't receive much pushback. [Tonnika Haynes] (11:14 - 12:00) Yeah, I can see that because before I start coaching with Rick, I would just be that person to try to help everybody in my community, whatever. And those would be the people that would give me the hardest time. Like when I tried to start doing things correctly to make sure that the business had a profit and I can pay everybody and pay myself. Oh, people had a problem with that. But as long as you're doing something free for them, they're here for it. But as soon as you need to like, dude, I need to pay my bills too. That's when you get a lot of pushback from the people that you actually thought they were going to support you. And that's almost with any business what I've heard. That's going to be any business. So in order to grow, you're going to lose a lot of those people. And I can imagine it hurts your feelings or something like that. How did you feel about that? [Xavier Bowe] (12:01 - 12:23) It didn't hurt my feelings. I don't take it personally. So I've been studying personal development. So I've worked on myself a lot. So I don't take it personally. Everybody wants what they want. And business is just business. Nobody gets into business for friendship or to do favors. Everybody gets into business to make a profit. [Tonnika Haynes] (12:26 - 12:29) So did you find customers to replace those people that you lost? [Xavier Bowe] (12:30 - 12:38) No, I'm still working on it. So that's where I'm at right now back on the grind of building a new set of clientele. [Tonnika Haynes] (12:39 - 12:43) How do you do that as a mobile mechanic? I have no idea. So I'm genuinely curious. [Xavier Bowe] (12:43 - 13:20) So one of the things that really helped me is I do have a warehouse that I share with somebody else that they operate. And I carry the lease. And the businesses next door, I'm really good with them. So I have a smoke shop and they have a few vehicles. And because they know me, they've given me a lot of work. And that's where I started to build. And then I have a tow company next door. So it's just basically been word of mouth. And community people that I know. [Tonnika Haynes] (13:21 - 13:25) Do you do anything on Facebook or the Google pages or anything like that? [Xavier Bowe] (13:26 - 13:41) No, that's the part that I'm still trying to figure out as well. Learning how to set up a Google page. I don't understand Facebook ads. So I'm trying to teach myself. [Tonnika Haynes] (13:41 - 13:45) I don't think you should have to pay for anything right now. I think your Google page is free. [Xavier Bowe] (13:47 - 14:01) Google page is free. I just been trying to figure out how to set it up because playing around with chat GPT, one of the advice they gave is don't put a physical location so that you're not restricted. [Tonnika Haynes] (14:04 - 14:14) I don't know. I don't know how that works. But do you have family here like nieces or nephews, certain age that might be better at those things that could help you with that? [Xavier Bowe] (14:15 - 14:19) My son is 17, but all they know is social media. [Tonnika Haynes] (14:20 - 14:21) Well, that's what you need. [Xavier Bowe] (14:23 - 14:31) Yeah, they know how to correspond to their friends. When I ask them to do stuff, they give me a blank stare like they don't know what to do. [Tonnika Haynes] (14:32 - 14:41) Man, listen, you from the Bahamas. I know that you can go in there and you can tell them boys, say boy, what's his name? What's his name? [Xavier Bowe] (14:41 - 14:42) Xavier. [Tonnika Haynes] (14:43 - 14:44) His name is Xavier too. [Xavier Bowe] (14:44 - 14:45) Yes. [Tonnika Haynes] (14:45 - 15:08) You put your foot down until Xavier, you need to help him that he needs you. Well, you need him. I can't even talk today to help build your social media. That's how you keep the roof over his head, isn't it? Make that boy an employee. Might come to him as a, you know, no, maybe not as a dad. Like, hey, I need you to help me with this. Like make him a part of the process. He's not interested. [Xavier Bowe] (15:09 - 15:34) Well, no, because he's in, he's in 12th grade this year. He's he's heavily involved in the band. And so band has been his life for the past four years. So he has no time for me. He's, he's practicing four days a week and Friday is game day. And then it's practice on Saturday and skating. And before I know it, the week is turned again. [Tonnika Haynes] (15:37 - 15:45) So I wish I could, you could find someone that's really good at it from that age bracket. Cause something's better than nothing. I can imagine, you know, something's gotta be better than nothing. [Xavier Bowe] (15:46 - 15:47) Definitely. Something's better than nothing. [Tonnika Haynes] (15:50 - 15:53) Do you have, like, do you take pictures of the works that the work that you do? [Xavier Bowe] (15:54 - 16:10) I haven't been doing that. That's the hard part trying when I have to retrain my brain. Cause I'm like, I get super focused when it's time to do a job. So thinking about picking up the camera and doing work never seems to coincide for me. [Tonnika Haynes] (16:11 - 16:25) Like Xavier, you gotta do it. I mean, if you don't do it, you're going to stay stuck. So we're going to have to come up with a plan of what, why you can do it. Like you're telling me all the reasons that you can't do it when you need to come up with the reasons why you can do it. [Xavier Bowe] (16:27 - 16:39) Like that's going to be, I know what I need to do to do it is that it's retraining myself to create a system and a process of what I, what I do first. So when I'm out of job, I have photos. [Tonnika Haynes] (16:42 - 17:10) Okay. Like just get a cheap tripod and put your cell phone up there. Just take a couple photos. They don't, you don't even have to like do a whole lot. Don't get in analysis paralysis where you think your social media has to look like somebody else's. Does that make sense? Like do what you do and just start making it a part of your personal Facebook maybe first and then start building your business Facebook. I don't, I don't know. [Xavier Bowe] (17:10 - 17:15) I have a business Instagram page, but I haven't, I haven't posted on it in so long. [Tonnika Haynes] (17:16 - 17:18) If you tell me one more thing that you haven't done. [Xavier Bowe] (17:18 - 17:26) I think that I just, um, you know, front gate, send out a friend request to you on, um, on my Instagram page. It's bo bo max. [Tonnika Haynes] (17:27 - 17:28) I saw it. [Xavier Bowe] (17:29 - 17:31) Yeah, I saw it. That's my Instagram page. [Tonnika Haynes] (17:33 - 18:09) So what are we going to do? Okay. Let's come up with a plan. The first plan is that you're just going to have to figure out how to just start posting. Like you got a phone, you got a good camera on the phone. You get to the job, you take a before and after you convinced, but are you going to do it? Is the question. Well, that's what I've been working on. [Benjie Burris] (18:16 - 18:16) Xavier. Yes. [Tonnika Haynes] (18:17 - 18:23) Okay. So, um, what kind of work do you do? [Xavier Bowe] (18:24 - 18:33) I, I, I've niched down to just preventative maintenance and like roadside assistance. I don't take jobs that take longer than two hours. So I don't do any. [Tonnika Haynes] (18:33 - 18:34) Why is that? [Xavier Bowe] (18:34 - 19:19) Because, um, code enforcement, um, buildings that don't allow mechanical work. It's been very, very tedious to, to be stuck and then not be able to complete work or being harassed by code enforcement or security. And also for just from personal experience, you know, being stuck on bigger jobs, just suck the life out of them. So I think that I can find a sweet spot where I can charge anywhere. You know, if I make the job profit, um, parts and labor anywhere between three 50 to 500 per ticket, I'm at a sweet spot. [Tonnika Haynes] (19:20 - 19:28) Okay. Like tell me what kind of jobs you're doing. [Xavier Bowe] (19:28 - 19:39) You say preventative maintenance, so starters, wheel bearings, suspension work, cooling systems, oil changes, brakes, suspension. [Tonnika Haynes] (19:42 - 19:46) Okay. How do you, what do you do with your alignments for suspension work? Curious. [Xavier Bowe] (19:47 - 19:58) I would just, um, sub sub subcontracted to somebody. Okay. I usually just refer people to, my friend in Coral Springs because he has an alignment rack. [Tonnika Haynes] (20:03 - 20:11) So you're doing everything yourself. You've got a pretty good business. Um, you could use more clients, no social media, and you think you need coaching. [Xavier Bowe] (20:12 - 20:14) I know I need coaching. I don't think. [Tonnika Haynes] (20:16 - 20:34) So, but first you're just going to have to see yourself as a business owner more than a technician. And the hardest part of being a business owner is actually putting that hat on. When you have to do your social media, you have to do your marketing and things like that. So you have to schedule that time. If not, you're just going to keep talking about it. [Xavier Bowe] (20:35 - 20:35) I know. [Tonnika Haynes] (20:37 - 20:41) How long have you just been talking about it in your head? How long have you been fighting that little battle in your head? [Xavier Bowe] (20:42 - 20:51) I've put a, you know, I've, I've put up videos and photos and then I, and then I fell off. So the battle has been off and on for a couple of years. [Tonnika Haynes] (20:53 - 20:56) Save you. You could have had seven shops by now. Come on now. [Xavier Bowe] (20:57 - 20:58) I could have. [Tonnika Haynes] (20:58 - 21:01) What do you envision your shop as? What do you think it's going to look like? [Xavier Bowe] (21:02 - 21:55) Um, what do I envision my shop as? I envision my shop as a, as a shop that creates a, an experience, a conscientious experience where customers come to get work done. Once again, I wouldn't want my shop to even be stuck with big work. I would definitely like to partner with other shops that do bigger work like engine and transmission, but basically a quick stop shop where people come in for tires, brakes, cooling, electrical stuff like that. Things that can be done in and out, quick turnover, and just a concierge service, you know, what I, what I'm going to say, um, you know, loaner vehicles, shuttles to take people where they need to go if they, if they have to drop their vehicles. [Tonnika Haynes] (21:58 - 22:04) So that sounds legit. How many employees do you think you're going to start off with? You'd want to start off with? [Xavier Bowe] (22:04 - 22:05) I would want to start. [Tonnika Haynes] (22:05 - 22:06) Tell me the whole dream. [Xavier Bowe] (22:07 - 22:18) So the whole dream would be, um, starting off at least two B's, two mechanics, um, a service writer, um, and somebody in the front office. [Tonnika Haynes] (22:22 - 22:30) Okay. Two B's, two techs, service advisor, and somebody in front of, where do you see yourself in this whole equation? [Xavier Bowe] (22:32 - 22:42) In this equation, I see myself as the person that's out there getting more business, you know, touching hands, speaking to people, selling, selling work. [Tonnika Haynes] (22:44 - 23:07) How do you, you, I think you have a dream, but the thing is like, my father likes to say, once you have the dream, you do have to wake up and start doing stuff. So what would you, once you wake up, you've got your vision, you've got your dream. What do you think the first step you should really be taking? [Xavier Bowe] (23:10 - 23:17) First step I should really be taking is just getting myself out there and connecting with people to make myself more known. [Tonnika Haynes] (23:20 - 23:22) And what's keeping you from doing that step? [Xavier Bowe] (23:24 - 23:40) Basically myself, I've been keeping myself from it, you know, just telling myself I have to, I have to fulfill the work and get the work. So I've been stuck in that analysis paralysis of trying to fill the work, fulfill the work and do, and get the new business. [Tonnika Haynes] (23:41 - 24:07) That's the hardest part about starting a business. Like I think that shop owners in the beginning, probably can, they can see themselves and they're ready to be an absentee owner. Cause that sounds like what you're ready to do. You want to have a shop. You don't want to be tied down to the shop, but you know, realistically the first couple of years, you're probably going to be, I'm okay with being tied down to the shop. [Xavier Bowe] (24:09 - 24:20) And I'm, I'm, I'm realistic with myself with that because I have been that the, the struggle for me is that I'm trying to figure out to make sure that I don't get stuck there. [Tonnika Haynes] (24:21 - 24:26) Cause I've been, I've been, you got to get there and then you'll find your way out. [Xavier Bowe] (24:26 - 24:32) You're going to be stuck there for a couple of years, but I've been stuck there for more than a couple of years now. [Tonnika Haynes] (24:32 - 26:54) No, you haven't, you've been stuck in the mobile for a couple of years because you have been stuck and you haven't worked. You haven't gotten up from the dream and start doing the other things. Like you're still on level one, you keep playing the same level, but now you got to go get uncomfortable again, like real, real uncomfortable, like real tired and real uncomfortable to get to the next level. It's going to hurt. It's like building muscle. So how are we going to get out of that comfort zone? Cause you can get a coach all day and they can give you all the great ideas, but if you don't do nothing and you just throw money away, what do you think about that Jack? So that like the first building you get, you might be in there by yourself with one lift and no service advisor. It's just going to be you. It's going to be Xavier and the walls and the telephone and the walls are going to start talking to you and the telephone is going to run you crazy. And then you're going to get to the point that you know that you can afford to get somebody in there to get the telephones. Then it's going to be Xavier and the one person answering the phone, but you're still going to have to be back and forth because you're going to know a lot more than them. And you're going to be dog crap tired and then you're going to have enough money in the bank and enough business sense to get a technician in there. Then it's going to be Xavier, the technician and the person answering the phone. You're still going to be crazy until you get to the next level of your learning and your coaching to start delegating more. So I, in my opinion, and I might be wrong and the internet will tell me if I'm wrong cause they do that every day. You're going to have to find a building first and you're going to be tired as hell until you get tired of being tired and then you're going to find somebody to answer the phone. You're still going to be tired, but we got to find a building so you don't have to worry about code enforcement getting on your nerves. So how many square feet do you need your first building? You just need to be able to pull two cars in there. How do you find it? [Xavier Bowe] (26:56 - 27:09) Just drive around and look for an MTB. Yeah, I guess there's a lot of what I would say space spaces for rent, but they don't have, they don't have lifts in them. [Tonnika Haynes] (27:10 - 27:11) You don't have a lift now. [Benjie Burris] (27:13 - 27:13) I know. [Tonnika Haynes] (27:18 - 28:36) So you don't need a building with a lift yet. Maybe you just need one of those scissor jacks type things for now. I don't want you to try, and I might be wrong and forgive me if I feel like I'm being harsh. I don't want you to try to go from being homeless cause you're mobile. So you're doing everything out of your car to a mansion. I want you to find a one bedroom apartment or the studio and make it work and make it work so good that you got money aside to get ready to find the next building that you can afford to put the lift in because you might have to just start with the scissor lift, the little jack on the floor. And that's fine because that's better than where you are. And it's taking you towards to where you're trying to get, but that's not saying that you're going to be there forever. So if you sign a year's lease there and you know, damn near cure yourself, making it happen there. And when you start getting too big for that space, that's when you know you've got money and a kitty and you're ready to go find it the spot with two bays and possibly a lift. You know what I mean? Feasible. [Xavier Bowe] (28:38 - 28:38) Feasible. [Tonnika Haynes] (28:39 - 29:03) Just put my head down and start to see if cause ain't nobody going to put your head down, but you say, I'm just telling you, I see it happening. So first step is finding a building, getting the lease apartment, little bit of spot. How long would you give yourself to do something like that? [Xavier Bowe] (29:04 - 29:14) I give myself a year cause I definitely need to build the capital to, I don't want to, I don't want to get in there and have my, my, my, my foot on my throat trying to pay rent. [Tonnika Haynes] (29:15 - 29:28) Right. So if you say you're going to get there in a year, what will be your plan? How much money do you need to have in a separate account before you're ready to go out there and venture? [Xavier Bowe] (29:31 - 29:49) I would say that's a one year's worth of rent. Rent here in South Florida is anywhere from three to 4,000. So I'd say these, I need at least 30,000 saved. [Tonnika Haynes] (29:50 - 30:03) So if you need 30,000 saves, don't make me do math cause I don't math. So you need to save 2,500 a month. I don't know. Don't make me pull a calculator out, embarrass me on the internet. Is that feasible? [Xavier Bowe] (30:05 - 30:14) 30,000 is roughly about 3,500 a month that at this point is not feasible because I don't even have the clientele to support, support those numbers. [Tonnika Haynes] (30:17 - 30:22) Do you think you could get the clientele to support those numbers if you did the proper marketing? [Xavier Bowe] (30:24 - 30:26) Definitely. If I did the proper marketing, I can get there. [Tonnika Haynes] (30:28 - 30:53) Currently, how many cars do you do a day? One. How many do you think you can do a day? Four. All right. Do you think with proper marketing, knowing where your shop is, where you are located, that you can do that? Has it been done before? [Xavier Bowe] (30:54 - 30:56) It probably has been done before. [Tonnika Haynes] (30:56 - 31:06) Has it been done by you before? No. Why not Xavier? [Xavier Bowe] (31:08 - 31:21) Honestly, I never put my, I never put, put it all on the line. I was comfortable, you know, living my life with my son. I did, I made just enough to keep myself and my son comfortable. [Tonnika Haynes] (31:25 - 31:58) What's the difference in your comfort zone now versus where you're trying to get? Because if you're comfortable, then your son, Xavier's 17. He's getting ready to go to school or whatever. You might not have as much financial dependence from him in a little bit. So you might be able to live off of less money. Then what happens? Are you going to do a half a car a day? [Xavier Bowe] (32:00 - 32:47) I wouldn't be in a comfortable state anymore. Like I'm not in a comfortable state anymore because he is going to college. And so now it, so I got to give you a backstory on why I was comfortable. You know, I made the transition here because of a tragedy. You know, we lost his mom to breast cancer and I just, I just made a shift. I quit my job in the Bahamas and decided to go back to school at 32. And I had a five-year-old to go to school and a five-year-old to support. And I was just trying to make sure that he was loved and taken care of and that I had enough time to spend with him. So the focus was, wasn't so much build an empire right now. It was take care of him, get him, take care of him. Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (32:48 - 33:30) So at 17, that makes a whole different conversation. You haven't been comfortable. You've been surviving. You've been taking care of your son. You've been mom and dad. So that's not being comfortable. If you don't give yourself more credit than what you've been given, you didn't even tell that story right. I'll come down and get you. You're trying to tell me that you have been raising your baby after you lost your wife and you've been mom and dad to a boy. Yes. So you have been working, working. That's a whole different job. [Xavier Bowe] (33:30 - 33:31) Yes. [Tonnika Haynes] (33:32 - 33:46) Um, I don't even have any dandelions or flowers or sunflowers or roses to send you, but I am sending you all kinds of virtual flowers right now because you just told me all I've been doing. You didn't tell me that you were super dad. [Xavier Bowe] (33:48 - 33:50) I just did what I had to do. [Tonnika Haynes] (33:50 - 33:55) You know, do you not know how many people don't do that? [Xavier Bowe] (33:56 - 33:56) I don't know. [Tonnika Haynes] (33:57 - 34:37) I mean, like, but you ain't, you ain't even got to worry about him because you already did it. I mean, that is my whole face is just hurting now because that's just beautiful. You, dude, you've been working your butt off. You sitting there like, Oh, well, you know, I just do this. I do that. You've been doing amazing. Listen, I got two boys and I know what kids smell like, and I know how they eat and I know how they will worry the hell out of you. And they will worry you because you're worried about them in the world. And they will worry you because they're just little short, dumb people. And we're trying to teach them how to get out here and survive. We're trying to teach them how to be a good part of the society. [Xavier Bowe] (34:38 - 35:07) It was, it was the, the, the most liberating part was getting him his permit and then his driver's license, because now I feel a little bit more freedom, but you can send them to the store and you can send them right now. I don't have to, I don't have to pick him up from bond practice anymore because my, my days used to consist of working, sitting at bond practice, waiting for him to get out of bond practice to get home at about 12, one o'clock sometimes because they're just practicing. [Tonnika Haynes] (35:07 - 35:08) That's crazy. [Xavier Bowe] (35:08 - 35:22) I, I, I know, I know, did it two times over and then the activities on the weekend, you know, summer camps. So, you know, yeah, my life has revolved around his schedule. [Tonnika Haynes] (35:24 - 35:41) So now you get to start working on your dreams and I think he'll be proud of you for that. So, okay. So it's time you've been, you've been working and so that one car day makes sense now, you know, you can do more. [Xavier Bowe] (35:42 - 36:26) Before then I was, you know, I was doing more cars, you know, like I said, when I started out my community, you know, I had a lot of work from, from the community because like a lot of, I did do a lot of businesses with behemoths that had, they bought auction cars and my job was just to do the graveyard of making sure the car was able to be put on a vessel to move back to the bond. So it was brakes and suspension work, fitting body parts, maintenance, you know, and I would, he would be with me and I would be up, you know, I had one guy that I would be up at all hours of the night doing work. Like I remember one job, it was him and me changing a fuel pump at three o'clock in the morning. [Tonnika Haynes] (36:33 - 36:53) So you've got a heck of a work ethic. You've got a hell of a dream. You've done the work as a dad, which is that never is going to stop. That's never going to stop. But now it's time to focus on you and it's time to focus on actually writing down exactly what you want and doing it. [Xavier Bowe] (36:53 - 36:55) I've got it written down. [Tonnika Haynes] (36:58 - 37:34) I'm gonna fight you. I'm gonna get on a plane. I'm coming to Florida and we gonna fight because it's time for Xav to get what he wants and it's time for Xavier to just make it happen. And I'm gonna, I'm gonna come down there with some gasoline and a fire and I'm gonna light your ass up because it's time to go to work. Like what in the world? Because you're still young and if you go ahead and get it started and you can get to where you want to get, so when you're 50, you won't be burnt out. But we got to get, we got to get it started again if that's what we really want. You know what I mean? [Xavier Bowe] (37:34 - 37:43) I really want it. That's what I've been focused on the last couple of months of getting it, getting it back to that, you know, with him graduating. [Tonnika Haynes] (37:43 - 37:48) Do you have, um, what's the name of the business? Is it Michael and Son? Which one is it? [Xavier Bowe] (37:49 - 37:49) Bo and Son. [Tonnika Haynes] (37:50 - 37:53) Bo and Son. All right. [Xavier Bowe] (37:53 - 37:56) Because I just, I just started a Facebook page for it. [Tonnika Haynes] (38:00 - 38:17) We're going to do some things, Xavier. We're going to have to get your social media started and get your clients up. Let's double your clients to two a day. So give yourself 60 days to focus on getting at least two clients a day. And do you think your pricing and everything is legit? [Xavier Bowe] (38:18 - 38:28) No, I think I got to work on pricing. So my, I, right now my labor rate is $130 an hour. [Tonnika Haynes] (38:29 - 38:31) I mean, what's the going labor rate for your area? [Xavier Bowe] (38:33 - 38:39) Going labor rate for my area is I think 150 is like 225. [Tonnika Haynes] (38:40 - 38:46) Okay. So what do you need? Do you know how to calculate what you really need to be charging yourself? Not worried about everybody else? [Xavier Bowe] (38:47 - 38:50) No, that, that I've been trying to figure out. [Tonnika Haynes] (38:51 - 39:02) All right. So we've got to find you the formula so you can calculate what your labor rate should be. We've got to figure out how to do your breakeven stuff and all of that. [Xavier Bowe] (39:22 - 39:29) Okay. That's something that I've been trying to figure out, you know, what am I charging correctly? How to charge correctly? [Tonnika Haynes] (39:34 - 39:36) Okay. Have you ever done any training? [Xavier Bowe] (39:38 - 39:44) I've done technical training for, you know, skills, not business training. [Tonnika Haynes] (39:47 - 40:04) So no business training. So you got to figure out how to charge correctly, charge and marketing. That's where you got to start. Charge marketing, and then you can start saving to get in your building. What do you think your son's going to do when he graduates? [Xavier Bowe] (40:05 - 40:08) He's into music. He wants to, he wants to study musical engineering. [Tonnika Haynes] (40:09 - 40:11) Okay. Has he been looking at colleges already? [Xavier Bowe] (40:12 - 40:15) He has. He's been hell bent on going to Bethune-Cookman. [Tonnika Haynes] (40:16 - 40:20) Okay. I visited that in middle school. That was a long time ago. [Xavier Bowe] (40:20 - 40:24) I just know that when I graduated high school, I don't like the school. [Tonnika Haynes] (40:25 - 40:26) You don't like it? [Xavier Bowe] (40:26 - 40:28) I do not like Bethune. [Tonnika Haynes] (40:29 - 40:29) Why? [Xavier Bowe] (40:30 - 40:36) When I went there, it was, it just felt old and overpriced. [Tonnika Haynes] (40:38 - 40:43) Well, it is. It's a school with a lot of history behind it. [Xavier Bowe] (40:44 - 40:53) Well, I guess coming from the Bahamas, I can't empathize. I was 16 at the time. It just didn't resonate with me. [Tonnika Haynes] (40:56 - 41:02) It's all good. So what else do you do outside of wrenching? [Xavier Bowe] (41:04 - 41:06) What else I do outside of wrenching? [Tonnika Haynes] (41:09 - 41:37) What else do I do? Nothing much outside of wrenching. So, so I can figure out how to help. What kind of mentorship or support do you think you need? So you think you need business training on learning how to charge correctly? How can I help? [Xavier Bowe] (41:37 - 41:50) I would say business training would encompass learning how to charge correctly, learning how to market, learning how to sell. Those are sales and marketing is like my weakest point. [Tonnika Haynes] (41:53 - 42:09) So I'm going to push your buttons. If you get business training and if you start marketing, what is going to keep you from staying in the same mindset and comfort zone that you are in now? [Xavier Bowe] (42:10 - 42:54) Nothing's going to keep me here. I'm, I'm, I'm in the process of moving that mindset. So like the comfort mindset was just, like you said, it was, I didn't even realize that it was survival, but it was just basically, I wanted to, I want, you know, the prayer at the time was that I wanted to work for myself and be able to spend as much time with my son as possible. And I didn't even realize when that became a reality. I was, it was just me and him. You know, I went, I went back to school, finished, graduated from Sheridan Tech. He went, he went on to elementary. And before I knew it, it was middle school. And now we're at the end of high school. So I don't even know where the time went. [Tonnika Haynes] (42:57 - 43:47) So now life forced you to slow down and, and pay attention to your son. That's what, what you needed to do and make sure that you guys were good. But now it is time for you to step up and go into the next level and figure out what the next level looks like for you. Cause you're only just beginning. And so we're going to find you a community where you got to speak up and ask for help and just be nosy. I would tell you to find out who you look up to in the industry, what you think your shop should look like. I would tell you to figure out how to connect with those people. And even if it's not a connection where you actually talk to them, just lurk, lurk, find out what they're doing. [Xavier Bowe] (43:48 - 44:24) Is that what you mean? I have been lurking and trying to learn. Like, like I said, my friend Josh from Triple A, like I've hung out at his shop, you know, just to shadow him and see how he did stuff, you know, and you know, he shared with me how he had two shops, he had a tow company. And so it was like, that inspires me. Cause like he bought a, he bought a new place up in Sebring, you know, and it's at the Reese's up in Sebring. And it's like, that inspires me. Like, I don't want to, I don't want what he has, but it inspires me that if he could do it, I can do it. [Tonnika Haynes] (44:25 - 44:38) Absolutely. So yeah, just, I think that's what you should be doing. And there's a lot of great people out here that are willing to help you, help point you in the right direction, ask questions, answer questions that you might have. [Xavier Bowe] (44:39 - 45:27) So I follow like a lot of people that, that, you know, already like Scanadano, like I've been a part of his community. I learned about Rick. Who else is the guy? I just found him. He does a podcast with us. It's a guy, I think he's out in, where is he out of? I think he's out on the West coast. Um, and a guy, another guy follow Oscar from, um, what is Oscar's shop name? Tommy Markham up in New York. [Tonnika Haynes] (45:27 - 45:41) Um, Eric Oh, is there a training opportunity? Like have you ever looked at a training opportunity and said, I wish I could be there. [Xavier Bowe] (45:42 - 45:42) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (45:43 - 45:44) What's that? Which one? [Xavier Bowe] (45:46 - 45:52) Um, which one was it? I wanted to go to the one that world pack holds on in Orlando. [Tonnika Haynes] (45:53 - 45:55) Oh, STX. They move it around. [Xavier Bowe] (45:55 - 45:56) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (45:56 - 46:14) This was my first STX. I went this year. It was in DC. Um, that is very, very, very big, very big. I would tell you to try to go to like a tools, ASTA or vision because you won't, you won't get lost. [Xavier Bowe] (46:14 - 46:21) I wanted to go to vision. I never made it to vision. I definitely wanted to go to vision. [Tonnika Haynes] (46:24 - 46:34) Okay. Well, the boy's getting ready to graduate. There's not going to be much keeping you from not going to vision. So if somebody got you tickets to vision, you will go. [Xavier Bowe] (46:36 - 46:38) I'm ready to buy my own tickets to vision. [Tonnika Haynes] (46:39 - 46:41) Well, why have you bought your tickets? [Xavier Bowe] (46:41 - 47:06) The last time I didn't buy my tickets was, uh, something came up for my son and I, I sacrificed that money for him, but this year I haven't seen you in two weeks. I'm not, I'm not going to make it. I know for sure. I've just not going to make it tools. [Tonnika Haynes] (47:06 - 47:12) So vision is in, what is it? April, March, April. [Xavier Bowe] (47:12 - 47:13) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (47:13 - 47:14) You're going to be there this year. [Xavier Bowe] (47:15 - 47:19) I got to see whether it, what is the cost to get there and try to get there. [Tonnika Haynes] (47:20 - 47:28) So the answer would have been yes. So you make the decision. Yes. I'm going to vision. And then make a vision account and you make yourself go to vision. [Xavier Bowe] (47:29 - 47:32) So that's what I'm going to make it, make an account to go to vision. [Tonnika Haynes] (47:33 - 47:49) That's your vision account, your vision account. So you can get an internet and come up with a bunch of information, take some business classes. You already took wrenching classes. I'm going to get in trouble for that one, but you don't need any more of those. You need business classes. [Xavier Bowe] (47:49 - 48:09) That's what I, you know, following you. That's what I realized, you know, and like, that's the, that's my fight that I've been fighting with. Like, I don't want to get stuck taking more business, um, branching classes, you know, like, but the, the, the crux that I found was like, do I need some while I'm still a tech or do I focus more on the business? [Tonnika Haynes] (48:10 - 48:43) So you can do both. That's the thing you're going to have to do both for the longest. And as painful as it sounds, you're going to have to do both. You can take the technical classes, but you can take those when they're in your area, or you can subscribe to someone like scanner Danner. You already follow some of the, yeah. So you're always learning. You're always learning, but if you don't know what to do with the money that you're making or how to make more money, then what's the point of having so many skills with wrenching, unless you're going to go work with somebody else. [Xavier Bowe] (48:43 - 48:46) Yeah. I can't work for anybody else. [Tonnika Haynes] (48:47 - 48:49) So you need to turn yourself into a boss. [Xavier Bowe] (48:50 - 48:55) Yes. They're working for somebody else is not going to work at this point in time. [Tonnika Haynes] (48:55 - 49:09) Yeah. Cause you've been by yourself for the longest. So you need to turn yourself into a boss. And in order to do that, you're going to take boss classes and read boss books and listen to boss type podcast. What else do you listen to? [Xavier Bowe] (49:10 - 49:19) I listened to boss. It was like, I follow a lot of like Alex Hamouzi, Don Martell, um, grand cardoon. [Tonnika Haynes] (49:23 - 49:38) So now it's just a mind shift and it's shifting. And I believe you, but marketing and budgeting is what we're going to have to work on first. So we can get ready to start saving for you to get in a building. That's what we need to do. That's my opinion. [Xavier Bowe] (49:39 - 49:51) You don't have to tell me I have a friend. He's been, he's been nudging me to get into a building where he's like, he's a, he's a dealer. And he's like, ah, he got to pay next to him. And he was like, whenever you're ready. [Tonnika Haynes] (49:56 - 50:06) Okay. So what's the next move that you have to make? Michael, what's the next move you're going to tell the internet, like the whole internet from the here, you say that you're going to do this next. [Xavier Bowe] (50:06 - 50:16) The next move is, is to start saving for that building. It's turning one client into two, two into three, three into, into four. [Tonnika Haynes] (50:16 - 50:18) So what's the actual move? [Xavier Bowe] (50:19 - 50:24) The move is to start marketing, to start speaking to people. [Tonnika Haynes] (50:27 - 50:40) Okay. So when are you going to have that done? When are you going to implement that? I've been, that's the one thing that you're going to be taught by coaches. Like you can, I've been, you have to have a deadline on it. [Xavier Bowe] (50:40 - 50:52) I've been implementing, talking to people and getting, I like I've, one of the things I started doing is just reaching out to past clients, um, seeing if I can get referrals. [Tonnika Haynes] (50:54 - 51:00) Okay. Well, let's do it. What are you doing? [Xavier Bowe] (51:00 - 51:17) A lot of my past clients, they do it for me. Like my neighbors, they, um, they refer me all the time. So I've got a lot of business from them. Like I get steady business from them. Like they have a lot of employees and anytime something's wrong with their cars, I'm the first person they call. [Tonnika Haynes] (51:19 - 51:25) So I would start with, um, developing your Google page. What else do you have to do today? [Xavier Bowe] (51:26 - 51:32) No, definitely. Today I developed a Google page that I just need help with of how to set that up. [Tonnika Haynes] (51:34 - 51:43) It's self-explanatory. Have you just go on there and try to figure it out. That's your job today. Today is Google page. And when it's done, screenshot it and send it to me. [Xavier Bowe] (51:43 - 51:43) Okay. [Tonnika Haynes] (51:44 - 51:54) And then you ask those neighbors and those friends that have been recommending you once it's up and running to leave you some reviews. [Xavier Bowe] (51:55 - 51:55) Okay. [Tonnika Haynes] (51:55 - 52:01) And then the next page would be your Facebook page. Your Facebook page will be easier, but it's not going to be as good as the Google page. [Xavier Bowe] (52:01 - 52:14) As far as getting the Facebook page, I'm not set up, but I opened it. I don't know what else would I need to do to set up a Facebook page? [Tonnika Haynes] (52:16 - 52:21) Your Facebook business page? Yeah. You've got something that says OMAX industries. What's that? [Xavier Bowe] (52:22 - 52:25) No, that's the Instagram. It's O and sons auto. I just, I just opened it. [Tonnika Haynes] (52:26 - 52:33) So yeah, we'll figure it out. We'll have to do that offline to make sure that you got the correct Facebook page set up. Cause I don't see anything. [Xavier Bowe] (52:35 - 52:40) I, I, in fact I did, I followed you on the page. I mean, like I live it legit chest. [Tonnika Haynes] (52:40 - 52:41) Yeah, that was Instagram. [Xavier Bowe] (52:42 - 52:46) No, it was, it was the other page. I did this on Instagram and the Facebook page. [Tonnika Haynes] (52:50 - 52:56) We had to figure that out. Cause I don't see it, but it's all good. But we know that's what we do. Your Google page next. [Xavier Bowe] (52:59 - 53:13) I I'm just switching to it right now. It says like, let me see if I can send you a message from it. Okay. Cause it's linked to it's still linked through my personal page. [Tonnika Haynes] (53:17 - 53:42) Bowen sons auto care. Yes. I see it. All right. We're going to put you a profile picture up there and a header picture. Yep. All good. I'll show you some stuff there. Once we get off the line, I'll show you how to do a couple of things there that might just spruce it up a little bit and get you a couple of followers. If you don't mind, I'll do it. [Xavier Bowe] (53:44 - 53:45) No, no problem. [Tonnika Haynes] (53:45 - 53:58) No problem. How often do you go home? Not often. Not often. What are you, what are you guys doing this weekend, this holiday weekend? [Xavier Bowe] (53:59 - 54:00) I'm working actually. [Tonnika Haynes] (54:01 - 54:06) That's good. What kind of jobs you got going on? [Xavier Bowe] (54:08 - 54:24) I just liked it this morning. I did. I had to do a tune up on a forklift and then I got a Volkswagen to check out. And then on Monday I got a Cadillac ATS to do a rear axle on. [Tonnika Haynes] (54:25 - 54:31) So you're going to have some videos and pictures of this reacts on this Cadillac and it's work you're going to do in the Volkswagen. [Xavier Bowe] (54:32 - 54:33) Yeah. Cadillac. [Tonnika Haynes] (54:34 - 54:36) Yeah. You sound so convincing. [Xavier Bowe] (54:36 - 54:57) No, the Cadillac already kicked my butt because I already took it apart to take out the old axle. And I just was waiting on the part to come because it was hard to find the part to replace it. And so the part is, the part is in. So now it's fighting the sun to put it back in. [Tonnika Haynes] (54:58 - 55:01) Oh, it's going to be hot. What's the temperature going to be down today? [Xavier Bowe] (55:02 - 55:03) In the nineties. [Tonnika Haynes] (55:04 - 55:34) Oh God. Florida is so hot and humid. My baby was living there for a couple of months and I'm headed to South Carolina to a family event. So I'm ready for the heat. Well, that's our step. So we're going to get a Google page together, start working on marketing. I'll see if I can sneak you into some of Rick's good classes that he gives, you know, he gives a lot of good advice online, um, for free. [Xavier Bowe] (55:35 - 55:41) I follow him like his, his, his, his, um, one thing, like I follow you do that on Monday mornings. Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (55:42 - 55:49) Cool. I still do too. It just reminds you, get you out of your own head. I like, I like to just one thing. [Xavier Bowe] (55:49 - 56:17) I like it too. Yeah. It's just being in the right, right. I say being in the right group helps you like, it's like, almost like osmosis. Like you get, you get it because somebody else gets it because sometimes like you may not get it and somebody else gets in there able to help you to understand for sure, for sure, for sure. [Tonnika Haynes] (56:17 - 56:25) Well, Michael, I like appreciate you for letting me verbally abuse you today and telling you what you should be doing. Like I'm somebody's boss. [Xavier Bowe] (56:26 - 56:35) This is nothing compared to, you know, when I was in Bahamas, I, uh, I was a part of Toastmasters. This is nothing compared to my group of Toastmasters. [Tonnika Haynes] (56:36 - 56:37) So I can be meaner? [Xavier Bowe] (56:38 - 56:49) Yeah. Like my father, my father was nobody. If you could be worse than my father, then that would be the only way that you could verbally abuse me. [Tonnika Haynes] (56:49 - 56:52) I'll try my best. I'll try my best. [Xavier Bowe] (56:52 - 56:59) My dad was here for a month and I became the apprentice again. [Tonnika Haynes] (57:01 - 57:03) You had to hold a flashlight? [Xavier Bowe] (57:03 - 57:08) Yeah. Every job it was, I, I know what I'm doing. You handed me the tools. [Tonnika Haynes] (57:12 - 57:15) Well, ain't nothing wrong with being bossy. [Xavier Bowe] (57:16 - 57:24) No, I did. I, I took it in strides. You know, I was like, you know what? I didn't fight him. I was like, you know what, what do you need me to do? What wrench do you need? [Tonnika Haynes] (57:26 - 57:38) That's like me fighting. I never argued with my dad. I rolled my eyes behind his back a whole lot, but hey, he was just trying to do his best. That's it. That's how he knew. I've got to get ready. [Xavier Bowe] (57:38 - 57:43) What'd you say? I accepted that about my dad years ago, so I've never fought him on it. [Tonnika Haynes] (57:44 - 58:19) It is what it is. It is what it is. I'm sorry, but I got it. Well, I'm not sorry. Cause I got, I get to go to the very country part of my family way down in South Carolina. It's going to be hot and a lot of mosquitoes, a lot of Nance, but a lot of good food. So I'm getting ready to get on the road. I am so glad I got to talk to you this morning and hopefully I can help you offline with some of the things that you're wanting to do. I'll just keep pushing you from the background. It's like, Hey Mike, what you doing? What you doing? [Xavier Bowe] (58:19 - 58:20) I would appreciate it. [Tonnika Haynes] (58:22 - 58:30) All right. And then we got to get you to vision this year. So start your vision account. Go ahead and look up your flight and figure out how much it's going to cost and all of this stuff. [Xavier Bowe] (58:30 - 58:31) Where's vision is going to be again? [Tonnika Haynes] (58:33 - 58:34) Visions in Kansas. [Xavier Bowe] (58:35 - 58:35) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (58:36 - 59:09) Visions is Kansas city. I think, let me hold on. Don't get me in trouble. But yeah, I think it's in Kansas. I don't even know where I was at last year, but it was fun. I see. I wonder if they got the dates yet. March 4th through the 7th. In Kansas city. So go ahead and put that on your calendar. Tell the kid, say, Hey, you have a house party where I'm going, but mommy, but dad's going to Kansas. Bring them with you. [Xavier Bowe] (59:11 - 59:13) Oh no, I'm not bringing them with me. [Tonnika Haynes] (59:15 - 1:00:19) So cool. I'll hopefully get to meet you at vision. And then, but I definitely will be keeping in touch with you between now and then I'm going to send, I'm trying to figure out Rick stuff when he has the open houses and all the things that he kind of does for free where he can go in and pick his brain. And like you said, even if you don't say anything, listen to what other people are talking about is always helpful as well. So March 4th through the 7th. Yep. That's vision for sure. So before we get off of here, if there's somebody that wants to get in contact with you and help you out with stuff, actually become a customer or whatever, you never know who the internet's going to introduce you to. How can they find you? What's the, what's your business information? [Xavier Bowe] (1:00:21 - 1:00:47) My business information, my business phone number is 954-917-7075. My cell phone is 954-248-8585. They can find me on social, I'm at Bow and Sons Auto here on Instagram. It's Bow Max. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:00:50 - 1:00:51) All righty. There you go. [Xavier Bowe] (1:00:52 - 1:01:00) They can find me at, I can't remember my TikTok account, but I'm on TikTok as well. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:01:01 - 1:01:17) All right. Well, find me on, find me and tag me on TikTok so I'll be able to find you. And then when I find that mobile mechanic guy that I'm talking about, I cannot remember his name because my brain is old. I can't remember stuff, but then I will, um, make sure you're following him as well. He's pretty cool guy. [Xavier Bowe] (1:01:18 - 1:01:18) Okay. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:01:19 - 1:01:51) And then like the more, the more people you find in your situation that are trying to get to the next level, like going ahead and networking with those guys too. That'll be a good, that'll be a good thing for you. That's what I think. I don't know, but I don't know everything. I just be talking. Keep talking. I will. I will. They be trying to save you. I actually try to push, start pushing record again because this is what happened when I'm always recording a podcast and we stopped recording. That's when people start talking. That's when the good stuff comes. [Xavier Bowe] (1:01:51 - 1:01:58) I'm a talker. That's, that's my, I do have the gift of gap. I, I am a talker. That's why I joined Toastmasters. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:01:59 - 1:02:03) Like I joined Toastmasters. I've been like three times. [Xavier Bowe] (1:02:03 - 1:02:35) I was in the, I was in the program until my wife passed and I moved here and then I, uh, I joined the program here, but it was nothing like the one that I had home. So I didn't stay with it because it was like, they were just too soft. Everything was just passive and everybody got a pat on the back. And that's, I wasn't used to that. So my, my group, they were very brutal. Like they, they really made you learn the craft and understand what you were doing because they focus on leadership and oratory skills. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:02:35 - 1:02:39) And so you said you did it in Bahamas. [Xavier Bowe] (1:02:40 - 1:02:40) Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:02:40 - 1:02:47) You know, Toastmasters is international. It is called Toastmasters International. But why did you do it? Like, why did you do it to start with? [Xavier Bowe] (1:02:48 - 1:03:25) To start with, I was, I wanted to start building myself. Um, I, you know, when my wife was diagnosed, I bumped into a guy, um, and he just had so much energy. I was in a training cause I worked at the hotel. I worked at Atlantis at the time and I bumped into him and he just had so much energy. And I was like, at the time I was just grieving. It was like, we just got the diagnosis. And it was like, I, I was, I was a train wreck and he came in this room and he was just like oxygen. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:03:26 - 1:03:26) Yeah. [Xavier Bowe] (1:03:27 - 1:04:37) And he just turned me on. He was like, you know, I, I just like, I told him I knew whatever he had, I was like, I need some of it. And he's like, go back to work, search the internet, type in, um, personal development, whatever comes up, listen to it. And I was like, I just followed the instructions. I went back to work, typed in personal development. Les Brown came up and it was like, I just listened, came back to another class, told him what I did, whatever he told me to do, I went back and did it. And, um, then I decided to go, go back to technical school in the Bahamas at the time. And I bumped into a teacher and she recommended, um, somebody to mentor me. And my mentor was in Toastmasters at the time. And he invited me to Toastmasters and it was something that I liked. It was, you know, it was a group of men because our group was only men and we dressed up in suits and you came and it was structured and it was like, it was just great. It was like mentorship, camaraderie, learning from somebody else who was doing it, you know, uh, and it just gave me life. It was an outlet. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:04:38 - 1:04:45) You have made my day. So for the people, I'm going to release this, Michael, don't you get shy on me again? I'm not shy. [Xavier Bowe] (1:04:46 - 1:04:47) I'm not shy. Okay. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:04:47 - 1:05:51) He's not shy because we, I stopped recording and then he just started talking. I'm like, Xavier, this is the stuff I wanted to talk about, but it happens often with the podcast. Anybody that tells you that like it'll happen all the time. What we were talking about, I'm just going to backtrack for a little bit is we're talking about mentorship. We were talking about the people that we know, this, that, whatever. And we're talking about how, how do we get younger people in the industry? So then he started talking about good stuff and I said, let's hit record again. So that's, we are, that's where we are audience. So if this links weird, it is so what? Um, but you just made my heart warm. Cause I also told you about my grandmother and you just said that person told you to go and look up leadership, a person of development. Now, Les Brown is the one cassette tape. She had like a series of cassette tapes and I listened to Les Brown all my life since I was a kid. Like literally those are the type of things that my grandmother always had going in the background. [Xavier Bowe] (1:05:52 - 1:05:55) I know his story back to front. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:05:55 - 1:06:00) I know his laugh. I love his laugh. You know what I mean? Like he's just a ball of energy. [Xavier Bowe] (1:06:01 - 1:06:04) If you, if you, if you all, if you lie on your back, always look up. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:06:04 - 1:06:44) Cause if you can look up, you can get up, you can look up, you can get up. And so that's the mentality that I grew up with. And so I do get down, I do get mad. I do get sad and all that stuff. But you, you can't keep me down, but too damn long because I know who I am. And I know who I am cause I've always just poured the correct stuff in my brain. We were talking about young people in the industry and mentorship. And I was saying, I had my grandmother mentor, my dad's my mentor. I didn't have to look to the outside. I'm blessed that way. Thank God you had your dad as a mentor. Your son will have you, but everybody doesn't have that. [Xavier Bowe] (1:06:45 - 1:07:14) And we were talking when I was in school, I did my level best to try and mentor kids that were, you know, in my class that come up. Um, a few of them listened and a few of them didn't, you know, like I got one kid, like he, he had his challenges and he was in class and I still, I'm still friends with him on Facebook. His name is Nick. Nick, Nick was, um, he was adopted and he had his challenges, you know, some things were difficult for him to learn, but once he got it, he got it. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:07:14 - 1:07:15) Yeah. [Xavier Bowe] (1:07:15 - 1:08:10) And I'm so proud of him to this day because he stuck with it, you know, and a lot of kids in class, they would talk about him and, you know, try to rag on him. But once he got something, he got it. And, you know, he, you know, from time to time, he shares with me stuff that he's doing. Like remember, um, a few years ago, he bought himself, uh, an Evo and he decided he's going to put a turbo. He's going to do the clutch. And he called me over and he was like, Mike, um, could you give me a hand? And I was like, no problem, Nick. I come over and we put the clutch in, we put the transmission in, sends me a video. He got, he got a run. And I was like, I was just, I'm so proud of this kid because against all odds, you know, people ragging on him. He's the only one that really stuck with it and got good at it. Even though, you know, he, he struggled in certain areas, he got it. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:08:12 - 1:08:50) But you said you did mentor a couple of people. And I would like to think that I've mentored a couple of people. And then sometimes we feel like they don't get it, or maybe they didn't stay in the industry, or maybe they didn't do what we wanted them to do. But I also know in my heart of hearts that you did, regardless of what it looked like in the end, you did make a difference. Like we were, you know, recently we've had a whole lot of mentorship type things and I released a podcast that I did with a mentor and a mentee. And then in the comment section, oh, I'm not, I had mentored people and they didn't do anything and they didn't do this and they didn't do that. You probably are making a bigger difference than you think. [Xavier Bowe] (1:08:52 - 1:09:20) I don't, when I go into mentorship, I don't go in with the, with the, the mindset of there has to be a specific outcome for me. It's just, I want to make sure that I'm, I'm pouring into somebody who is open to receiving whatever they need at the time. You know, I, what I, what I don't like is like some people, they come back and they try to blame you because they didn't do what they wanted to do. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:09:21 - 1:10:01) Now that's dependency. That's them. Like I can give you all that I can give you, but it's up to you to implement it. You can't implement anything for anyone. But for whoever's listening right now and it says mentorship is stupid or nobody listens. Don't let that one kid or that one person in my kid, adult, whatever, keep you from doing what you're supposed to do. Cause we're supposed to pour into each other. We're supposed to be community. Um, community is missing. Community is missing. And he's like, we were saying earlier offline. It's not just in this industry. No, it's in a lot of industries. We are the uncles and aunts now. [Xavier Bowe] (1:10:01 - 1:11:28) It's in a lot of industries, a lot of industries. In fact, I, even with my son's band group, like my son was a junior last year and the guys who were his seniors, like he had two, he had a set of twins that he was really close with. And I had moments where I was able to, you know, pour into them. And like one of the, one of the kids, he was like, he's going into a, he wants to go to medical school. And I was like, I just kept on telling him he swing for the fences, like, you know, take as many attempts as possible, you know, network, get out there, you know, do internships, whether paid or unpaid, you know, cause I can put you in position to get where you want to go. Right. And crazy enough, his mom texts me at the end of the year and she's like, well, they're looking for a job. Um, if you have any availability, I was like, I would, but I don't like to take kids on if this is not what they want to do. And it would be a, it would, it would be a waste of time taking on a kid if this isn't what they want to do. And it's like, I was like, I would suggest because of what he shared me to look for, look for a position close to what he wants to do. Because I did it already. I did it already. And one other friend, I took on her son for the summer and really, truly all he wanted was a paycheck. Then he got it. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:11:30 - 1:11:37) But you probably did make a difference in his life though. I just want to think on the positive side of it, but I'm sure, I'm sure. [Xavier Bowe] (1:11:37 - 1:12:29) I'm saying like, I, I just knew that I would have to be more when it comes to the automotive side, I have to be more strategic and, and, and discerning when taking on somebody, because I like to gear people, I like to pour into people into what they want to do. And so one of the biggest things I always ask is, what is your dream? What do you want to do? And how can I help you get there? I don't need you to do what I, what you think, because everybody as Earl Nightingale says, he says, we are, we entered the era of every, everybody's playing follow the follower. You know, everybody's cheating off somebody else's paper, thinking that those are the, those are the correct answers. When it may be the correct answer for me, but it may not be the correct answer for you. And you're, and when you fail, you wonder why did you fail? Because my path was never meant for you and your path was never meant for me. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:12:32 - 1:14:22) I like to think about it. Like I've had people come to the shop. My dad always had like kids come to the shop and work. And I'm just thinking back on it. For example, if there's been 10 kids that have come through the shop, not as a mentorship program, but for a summer job in a hangout and make some extra money or whatever, maybe only one of them is still in the industry. And that would be Nick. So I know that personally I had Malibu. So I had Jeshua, he's in the, he's going to get me. He's in the Navy. I hope it's the Navy. Don't get me, Jeshua. But he spent a couple summers with me and I know I made an impression on him. Then there's Hunter. He's in construction now, but I do specifically remember him. He was out of high school, started his construction company. He had spent summers with us since he was like 14 or 15. But I remember that he came and asked me what business books he should be reading. And that just touching, just my whole heart is so full. Now just get to watch him and his family and his kids grow up. He's not in the industry, but I know I made a difference and my father made a difference. And there's kids that I have, you know, that hang out. So mentorship, I definitely want more kids to come in the industry, but we just need to remember the whole village part of everything. And so you've listened to Les Brown. So I know you listen to Jim Rohn. Yes. I mean, that's what I listen to every day. So I know, you know, the story of sowing the seeds. Some seeds will fall on bad land and the birds will get some seeds and then some seeds are going to grow, but that doesn't mean you stop planting them. [Xavier Bowe] (1:14:22 - 1:14:34) I don't stop planting. What I do is I'm very intentional about asking people what they want before they ask me what I can give to them so that I know what to give to them. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:14:35 - 1:14:35) Okay. [Xavier Bowe] (1:14:35 - 1:15:42) Because I'm not going to discourage you from being in the field, but I want to be able to point you in a direction so that you don't look from a blindness perspective of thinking that the industry is only this. Because the industry is, you could be a service writer, you could be an owner, you can be a shop foreman. I don't want somebody to come into the industry and think that the only thing I can ever do is turn wrenches. Or the industry is where I have to stay because you can be an educator, you can be an instructor. There's so many facets to any business that just because you have the experience, like royalty, I think they're in Savannah, Georgia. His son started in the shop and his son realized that, hey, he wasn't going to turn any wrenches. He went to the front of the shop and now they have two locations and he's running the social media for that shop. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:15:43 - 1:17:08) Yeah. So that's a spot for anybody. But back to increasing our staff and our technicians, we cannot bring these kids in the industry. We cannot get them excited about it and then they come in a building and then we not support them. Not saying that's you. How do you feel? Because you haven't been in the shop, but I know you saying in culinary that it's kind of the same thing happened over there. In my opinion, I can see that young people will come in the shop and then you've got older, more experienced techs, maybe a little irritated with the whole industry and they're over in their retirement age and they're not interested in helping that kid, which I don't think is fair at all. I've been cussed out in the comments for saying such things, but it is necessary for us to mentor the kids when they get there. They can go to the technical school, they can do this and they can look at YouTube, but it's something about hands-on experience and getting the wrench thrown at you by your uncle, your uncle mechanic guy. There's so much stuff that's not taught in the books that these technicians have in their head. They've got so much knowledge and the things that you hear is I don't get paid to help somebody else learn. It's mean as hell. Why would you say that? Somebody help your goofy ass learn? That's what I'm thinking and I sound so unprofessional, but that's what I think about it. [Xavier Bowe] (1:17:09 - 1:17:28) I don't think that you turn wrenches yourself. So coming from that type of background, I think what it is is that from the era that I came from, that's just the mentality of you have to be tough enough to go through it if you want to learn. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:17:29 - 1:17:36) But you got to put them through it. Put them through it. I'm not saying that they need to be coddled or anything like that. [Xavier Bowe] (1:17:36 - 1:18:41) What I'm saying is that I come from an era where you have to be tough enough to wear through somebody being miserable enough to learn from them. Where they're not just going to readily teach you anything because that's how it was for me in the culinary. You've had people that they just want to hoard information just because they feel that you're going to come and take their job. And you have to be, to me, that you just have to be tough enough. As my grandmother said, you have to be like a duck and let the water roll off your back. You got to be tough enough to wear through that to get the information. And unfortunately this generation isn't tough enough to wear through that where you have that grumpy old guy who's going to be like, I'm not going to teach you anything. Because what happens is that you have to become good at observing and mimicking because he's not going to teach you by just pulling on your ring. You're going to have to take a moment and step back and kind of observe him and then try for yourself. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:18:43 - 1:19:20) That's what I'm talking about. That's what needs to happen. They don't need to be talking to Fred, the technician, and just asking him, how do I do this? No. Fred needs to say, you need to get your ass over there and figure it out. Now, what did I tell you last time? Did you do this? Did you do that? I'm not saying coddle these kids. There's no way. But I follow you on what you're saying. These kids are too sensitive to be able to take. They're thinking mentorship is, hey, kid, come sit with me and I'll tell you a beautiful story on how to fix this. Come. And there's rainbows and stuff. No. I don't believe that. So I hope that didn't come across that way. [Xavier Bowe] (1:19:20 - 1:20:05) No, it didn't come across that way. I'm sure it didn't like my experience over there. I just had to be tough enough to endure the mental barrage of insults and stand back and observe and then practice. And then here's what my experience was. I would stand back, observe, and then go and practice. And then the old miserable person would be like, come, let me show you what to do because you're not doing it right. And they want to make sure that they know how to do it right. But this generation isn't strong enough to stand back, observe, try to do it themselves, and wait for that older person to come and help them to do it better. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:20:06 - 1:20:07) That's how my dad was at times. [Xavier Bowe] (1:20:11 - 1:20:12) That's how your dad was with you. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:20:17 - 1:20:34) That's how I was taught. And he was just like, he's kind of scared to ask the question at the end. Like, okay, let me see how much I can figure out first. And then they'll see you putting the effort in and then maybe they'll pour more into you. But what you're saying is, no, they're quick to just want the answers without the toughness with it. [Xavier Bowe] (1:20:34 - 1:21:03) So for me, one of the things that I practice with my son from everything that I've learned is the first mental shift with my son was I reframed mistake. And I said to him, the mistake is the lab. I need you to experiment. And I would always tell him when he's doing something, you're experimenting, go experiment as much as you need to. And then come back to me and let me see how I can help rather than just running there and try to fix it for him. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:21:04 - 1:21:39) Right. The last podcast I did with the mentor and a mentee, that's how their relationship was. He said, I remember the kid saying he was almost scared to ask him without making sure he did all that he could because he knew what he was going to say when he walked up to him. So that kid walks up to you and say, oh, how do I do this? You know, he said he would just be like, he didn't want to go over there without an idea of what he wanted to do. So no kids can not, not kids, just young people, anybody in a position that you need to be mentored, you need to make sure you put the work in as well. And you got to have a thick skin. [Xavier Bowe] (1:21:39 - 1:22:57) I think one of the biggest, one of the biggest things is that we've been taught that mistakes are these cataclysmic things that happen. And one thing I learned from Jim Rohn is that if you turn a mistake into a lesson, you would, you would reframe from the perspective of what can I learn? What did this mistake teach me that I can now implement in the next attempt? Because like in, in, in automotive, you know, you're going to make a mistake the first couple of times. And once you learn, if you learn from the mistake, then you get faster. Cause you'd be like, it's like for me, like, um, you, the first time, like working on this Cadillac, I've never done a rear axle on this Cadillac and I got beat up. But when I go back at it, after I'd made a few attempts of battling at it, I was able to figure out, okay, what do I need to do first? Then next and next to make this easier. And then I already know if I've done this side, I can do the next side faster because I've already made the mistakes. But I've been in class with the younger ones and they don't want to make the mistake. And if they make a mistake, they just give up. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:22:59 - 1:23:00) What do you think that comes from? [Xavier Bowe] (1:23:01 - 1:23:34) I think that comes from being, you know, especially here in America, everybody gets a participation, whether they show up or not. These kids don't know what it is to fail and be okay with it. They're so used to somebody saying it's okay. Like I grew up in the Bahamas where if you fail the test, you fail the test. There's no making up, but here you have almost unlimited chances to make up on anything. So there's no consequence. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:23:35 - 1:24:02) Yeah. I remember I said that about participating participation trophies and a lot of the TikTok younger generations, I can't talk today. They were saying, well, you guys gave it to us. You gave us the participation trophies. And I'm like, my kids didn't get no damn participation trophies, but that makes a lot of sense. I liked the way you can see it because you were not educated. You didn't come up in the U.S. So you get over here and we're like, man, punk ass kids. But yeah. [Xavier Bowe] (1:24:02 - 1:24:19) It was like, I remember taking the entrance exam to get into Sheridan Tech. And I was like, this is elementary school work for me. Like, this is what these kids are worrying about to get into technical school. Like my son could do this work. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:24:21 - 1:24:25) Yeah. And that's the local community college. What is that? [Xavier Bowe] (1:24:25 - 1:25:06) It's a part of the Broward. It's a part of Broward school systems down in South Florida in Broward County. They have three technical schools to service the different areas of Broward. So they have a central campus, a Southern campus, which is the one I went to on the Northern campus. They run dealer specific programs. Like at my school, they ran a Ford program, a GM program, a Chrysler program. In the North, they ran an Audi, Volkswagen, Toyota program. And at the Central, they did, what did they did at Central? They did like heavy trucks, diesel on the Central campus. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:25:07 - 1:25:10) So the entrance exam for this technical school was elementary? [Xavier Bowe] (1:25:11 - 1:25:38) For me. I, in fact, when they gave me my test results, they said I scored out of, out of limits. And I was like, what does that mean? They was like, you scored, you scored so high when I, when the computer did the pre-test, I was being lazy and this computer said, okay, this is where we're going to place you. And when I took the real test, it was like, I scored so far out of the perimeters that I had to retake the test. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:25:41 - 1:26:14) So we've raised and under educated and allowed these kids to get by because what happens is, and I'm not this kind of parent, the kid gets a bad grade and it goes home and he cries to his mom or she cries to her mom and the mom goes in and cusses the teacher out or the project is late. You know, they didn't get the project in on time. Project was due Friday and the mom will write a whole letter and say, oh, we had a family emergency. Knowing good and well that she lying and try to get the project extended for the kid. [Xavier Bowe] (1:26:14 - 1:26:24) And the teacher accepts it because if the teacher doesn't accept it, the mother, the mother helped to do the majority of the project. The kid didn't, didn't really do any of the project. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:26:25 - 1:26:33) Yep. And so when you turn into an adult, after all of this coddling and you had to go into the real world, we're trying to owe them something. [Xavier Bowe] (1:26:33 - 1:26:43) You owe me because I've always got a participation trophy and you should pay me X, Y amount of dollars because I went to school and I graduated. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:26:44 - 1:26:50) Yeah. Well, how the heck do you even turn that around? It's been happening so long. [Xavier Bowe] (1:26:51 - 1:27:09) You don't, you don't try to turn it around and you know, it's, it's one, one person at a time, but there's a saying that says that hard times create strong men, strong men, create easy times, easy times, create weak men, weak men, create hard times. And we're just in the cycle of. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:27:10 - 1:27:28) Yeah, because I heard somebody say that there's like this just strong man that got the family. I don't need to got the family out the hood. And then now the family's doing good. And then the next generation might do a little bit better than you want those kids not to work so hard. And then those kids lose every daggone thing and then you back into poverty. So it's a horrible site. [Xavier Bowe] (1:27:28 - 1:28:01) What I would say like rock bottom, what is the, what's the crux of, I would say our generation and not all of us, but most of us. And I've heard this said amongst my cohorts is that I don't want my children to go through what I went through. And so we've had so many people in our generation and just a little bit ahead of us say that and implement that, you know, they didn't want their kids to be beaten. They don't want their kids to do this. And they, they work so hard to do that. And now the kids are what they are because you took away. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:28:02 - 1:28:02) Gentle parenting. [Xavier Bowe] (1:28:04 - 1:29:31) It's, it's so much more than just gentle parenting. It's like you, you, you've created a encapsulated human being that doesn't realize that the real world exists and these things are just what they are. You know, I, like I, I, I attested to like, when my son was younger and I put him in school for the first time. So the first three years of his life, my family members helped to raise him. So he never went to school. He was never exposed to any germs. And I, I promise you the first year of his preschool education was a nightmare for me. He spent two weeks in the hospital because every week he was sick. He had no immune system. He was not prepared for the barrage of germs that kids who've been going to daycare from, they were taught infants was used to. And so when I put him into, into, into preschool, his immune system was like, what is going on? And he was sick every day. Right. And I, I lost my mind when they said, Oh, we have to keep him. And I was like, it was like, they're going to call CPS. What do y'all call CPS here? It was like, they're going to call social service for me. Cause I said to him, I'm not leaving my son. And it was like, Mr. Boat, you have to leave him. It's not a choice. And it was like, I don't know how am I going to do this? And it's like, I spent every day going to work and he was that sick. Yeah. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:29:33 - 1:29:36) Wow. Cause he was so protected from germs. [Xavier Bowe] (1:29:36 - 1:29:36) Yes. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:29:37 - 1:29:46) And so we're kind of doing the same thing with the kids. We think we're protecting them. And when they have to go into the germy world, they can't handle it. [Xavier Bowe] (1:29:46 - 1:30:14) No, they're having meltdowns. That's why everything is so is, is, is termed mental health now because nobody knows how to, they don't have coping mechanisms. They don't, they don't know how to communicate with one another. You mentioned it early on in our conversation. You know, when you go to a restaurant, what's the first thing a kid looks for at a restaurant? Wi-Fi. I don't know. No Wi-Fi. They want to know what's the Wi-Fi. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:30:14 - 1:30:18) My kids look for a coloring book, but these kids are like this. [Xavier Bowe] (1:30:18 - 1:30:23) I'm talking about these kids, these kids. The first thing they ask for is what's the Wi-Fi. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:30:23 - 1:30:32) Even the adults do that at the shop. What's your Wi-Fi? What's your, sit down and read a book. Talk to me. I don't know. But yeah, gosh, you're making, this is so good. [Xavier Bowe] (1:30:33 - 1:30:58) The first question they ask, and you're right. Even adults, you, you, if you go out to eat and you just be, be the observer and look at around a restaurant and ask yourself, how many tables are actually speaking to one another or are they on their phone? I mean, I made it a point with my son as he was growing that whenever we went to eat, no phones were allowed at the table. We left the phones in the car. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:31:00 - 1:31:03) But you know what? I did that with my kids when they finally got phones and you know who picked up the phone? [Xavier Bowe] (1:31:04 - 1:31:17) Mommy. I didn't, I didn't pick up my phone because I implemented it and I had to instill it. So I left my, in fact, he didn't have a phone. So I left my phone in the car. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:31:18 - 1:31:31) Like we were talking earlier. I don't know if we recorded anything, but yeah, the boys were 14. I think sometimes like 14 or 15 when he got his phone and that was out of necessity. But yeah, my kids smelled, they went outside, they stink. [Xavier Bowe] (1:31:31 - 1:31:43) His sleep routine was we went to, we went to bed listening to audio books. So that was his sleep routine. Like to go to bed, I put on an audio book. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:31:44 - 1:32:19) Yeah. So we've raised these people that are addicted to social media, that are addicted to electronics, no coping mechanisms. Don't really know that the real world will eat you up and spit you the hell out. But here's the thing. If my boys were here, I think they just left. Cause they were getting ready to go out of town. They would tell you like, mommy would say this little honey, don't nobody care out in this world, but your mom and maybe your daddy. And then somebody is going to have a fit about me saying that I'll say it again. This world will eat you up and spit you out. But we don't want to say that as parents, it's a truth. [Xavier Bowe] (1:32:20 - 1:33:07) But for me, that's how I built my son. When he went to elementary school, our mantra every day was, I asked him, who are you? Who loves you? And I made him repeat that. Repeat his name, who loves him? Your dad loves you. That's all you need to worry about. So when you get to school, we're not concerned about if you make friends or not, you know, who loves you, you know, who you are. So you don't have to worry about somebody else validating your identity. And that's what these kids need. They need to, they need to be able to know who they are. And so they can stand on their own two feet. My grandmother would say, every top has to sit on his own bottom. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33:09 - 1:33:10) Every what? [Xavier Bowe] (1:33:11 - 1:33:13) Every top has to sit on his own bottom. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33:14 - 1:33:15) Every top has to sit on his own bottom. [Xavier Bowe] (1:33:16 - 1:33:17) Every tub, T-U-B. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33:18 - 1:33:20) Tub. Oh, I was like, what? [Xavier Bowe] (1:33:20 - 1:33:22) Okay. Every tub has to sit on his own bottom. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33:23 - 1:33:28) Every tub has to sit on his own bottom. You're your own support system. [Xavier Bowe] (1:33:28 - 1:33:29) You're your own support system. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33:36 - 1:33:43) That was a good one. What'd y'all think about that one? Every tub has to sit on his own bottom. [Xavier Bowe] (1:33:45 - 1:33:49) You can't look for somebody else to do it for you. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:33:52 - 1:34:00) So let's go back to Toastmasters because I've tried that a couple of times. It seems like that gave you not that you were lacking confidence. [Xavier Bowe] (1:34:00 - 1:36:10) That gave you a lot more of what to me, I feel like the confidence that Toastmasters gave me specifically the group that I joined was that it was an all males group. So I was surrounded by aspiring upcoming young men, seasoned young men, older gentlemen who have already become successful in their careers. And it was just a group of men mentoring other men, holding us accountable, being men at times, but also pushing you to be your best and holding you accountable at the same time. And so my group is called 1600 Toastmasters, club 1600 in the Bahamas. And it's a grandfather club because we've birthed other clubs throughout the country. But what it was is that one of the biggest things for me was that we had a uniform code and uniform code is that every man show up in a suit. You ought to have on a jacket, pants, and a tie. That was it. You couldn't come to a meeting unless you had on a jacket, pants, and a tie. And what it did for me at the time was I was working at the hotel and I was trying to get into management because I wanted to learn management for myself. So when I left to do my own business, I got free training in management, but I was working in the kids club at the time. And my resort manager, she wouldn't, she never recognized me. And this one time I was going to meet a night and I dress, I changed before I left the property and she walked past me. She didn't recognize me. And she did a double take him and she recognized who I was. She was like, she didn't recognize me because how I was dressed. And that just cemented the confidence of being well-dressed, well-spoken, knowing how to speak to people and be an orator and lead. But more importantly, people really take into account how you present yourself. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:36:11 - 1:36:27) If you tried that in the United States and you said the Toastmasters group only, you can only do this. You can only do that. You can only do that. Somebody will find a civil liberties lawsuit and sue that group for something. Isn't that crazy? [Xavier Bowe] (1:36:28 - 1:37:18) Yes, it is. And that's why I couldn't sleep because it was like, it was, I felt like there was no growth in the Toastmasters group I was in because everybody got a pass. It was like, in order to become a better speaker, you need to be, what we did was we had instant feedback. So when you finish a speech, there was a evaluation period after speech. So every speech, every speaker was assigned an evaluator. So once your speech was finished, you had somebody to evaluate your speech based on that evaluation. It meant if you were able to pass that level that you were on, or you had to go back and redo your speech so that you meet the criteria for passing the level. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:37:19 - 1:37:24) And then here in the United States, you found that they were giving out participation trophies again. [Xavier Bowe] (1:37:24 - 1:37:28) Yes, participation trophies. Everybody's speech was fantastic. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:37:31 - 1:37:32) Interesting. [Xavier Bowe] (1:37:34 - 1:37:58) You know, in our club, we had what we call an R arm counter, which is they trained you to not be relying on crutch words like R arm the, and the R arm counter taught me when I first was introduced to it, how many times you say R an arm in a speech and really being intentional about using your vocabulary and building your vocabulary. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:38:02 - 1:38:17) That would help so many people like the online group that I've been with. I don't know anything any different, but we have an arm on the counter. My word is so I say so for so, so, so, so, so I started to recognize that. [Xavier Bowe] (1:38:17 - 1:38:38) Well, that would be considered a crutch word and somebody would count how many times you say it, but not we count how many times you say it. Now you would have somebody coaching you. Okay. Here's, here's a technique on how to change that. Here's words you can use that better suit so that you're not relying on that one word. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:38:41 - 1:39:03) So how could we Trent like duplicate that in the automotive world for incoming technicians into the business? It's like no participation trophies. We're going to critique you. If you want to get where you want to go, you're going to have to take the criticism. [Xavier Bowe] (1:39:05 - 1:39:38) It's going to take us bridging a gap of, it's going to be a learning curve on both. It has to be a learning curve on both ends. So as the person mentoring or in the position of teaching, you're going to have to know when to throttle and when to pull back off the throttle. You're going to have to take time to get to know your, the person you're training to figure out what's the best method to implement what you want to implement. It cannot be a one size fits all system. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:39:41 - 1:39:42) That makes sense. [Xavier Bowe] (1:39:45 - 1:41:00) You got to make sure at the same time, but at the same time of not being a one size fits all system, there has to be, there has to be a construct to it. There has to be certain criteria that have to be met across the board. Like these are just a bare minimum criteria that have to be met. And if you cannot hack it, then we mentor you in another direction and ask you just a blatant question, where would you like to be? And how can I help you get there? Because I think that the first thing we have to do is be honest with anybody. And that's what I've done. I've asked the honest question, where do you want to go? And don't tell me what you want me to hear. I try to get people talking because when you get people talking, and like you said, all of the good stuff started to fall out after we started talking. So you have to get people talking so they can start to talk about themselves. And then you realize, okay, here's where they really want to go. This isn't what they really want to do. This is just a stepping stone. So let's get the stepping stone out of the way and give you different stepping stones. Okay. I realized that yeah, automotive may not be for you, but here's a part of automotive that could get you to where you want to go. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:41:02 - 1:41:12) Okay. I want to own my own shop and you're starting at the bottom, but you want to own your own shop. Then maybe you shouldn't be back here wrenching. Maybe you should be upfront. [Xavier Bowe] (1:41:12 - 1:41:43) So if I had somebody come and say they want to own their own shop and they want to circumvent that, I would be like, okay, so let me teach you how to find money and people to invest in your idea so you can go and buy a shop. That's not even worried about turning wrenches. Let's just take you to where you want to go. You've already established that you don't want to turn wrenches. So you're going to have to, here's a different path that you're going to have to figure out if this is truly what you want to do. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:41:44 - 1:41:50) But as the mentee, don't waste my time having me teach you to turn wrenches if that's not what you really want to do. [Xavier Bowe] (1:41:50 - 1:41:50) Exactly. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:41:51 - 1:41:53) That's fair enough. Okay. [Xavier Bowe] (1:41:54 - 1:42:22) Because I can, you know, I can teach you all day, but if you're, if the student isn't willing to learn, no teacher can teach him. Right. You know, for me, like I, I hate computer work. That's the being of my existence. That's the being of my existence. Like when I worked in the hotel and I was in the kids club, the hardest part of my job was sitting down to do the computer work. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:42:22 - 1:42:23) Yeah. [Xavier Bowe] (1:42:23 - 1:42:30) If I could delegate that, like how you said, if I could delegate that to somebody, if I could pay somebody for that, that would be the first thing I would pay somebody to do. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:42:31 - 1:42:39) Right. So if you want to own the shop and you hate wrenching, then just find the best wrenching. Don't worry about that. Delegate that part, but just be really good at what the heck you want to do. [Xavier Bowe] (1:42:40 - 1:43:52) Exactly. So you either partner with somebody who is a good wrencher and like you build a shop with, okay, you be the technician and I'd be the front office guy. And we build this business together or you give them, you give the tech, the wrenching person a percentage of the business as a buy-in so that you can build the business. So you gotta, you gotta find a way to teach them the skills that they need to get where they need to go instead of wasting time doing something that they're going to hate and then walk away from the industry thinking that it's the industry rather than them not knowing what they truly want from the industry. I kind of did that with my oldest son because my oldest son, he came to me when he was young and he was like, he wanted to play basketball. And I said to him, okay, I believe in anything you want to do. I said, but let's be realistic. If the basketball thing doesn't work out, how can you still be involved in basketball without playing the basketball? And I gave him like, you can be a sportscaster, you can be a general manager, you can own a team, you can still be in what you love. You just may not be the basketball star. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:43:53 - 1:44:14) Right. He's a smart dude there, Xavier. This is a good conversation. I like conversations. I like different perspectives on how to think about things too. Like I always, there's always more than one way to do things, one way to look at things too. [Xavier Bowe] (1:44:15 - 1:44:42) Well, that's something I learned from Dr. Wayne Dye. He always says that if somebody tells you something, you never say that, never turn it down. He says, see, that's an interesting point of view. I never thought of that. Let me think about it. And so before I just shut somebody down, I always be like, you know what? That's interesting. Let me think about it. Let me marinate on it. It may not be for me, but I'm not going to just say hell to the no. It's an interesting perspective. Let me think about it. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:44:43 - 1:44:56) And it's like when you have a favorite food and someone's like, oh, you eat that? I'm like, yeah, eat that. Good gracious. Leave me alone. I like my food. This is my, this is my perspective. This is what I believe in. And maybe you can just take a little bit away from it. [Xavier Bowe] (1:44:59 - 1:45:34) During my wife's battle with breast cancer, we tried a alternative method, which meant we gave up eating meat and ultra processed foods. And after she passed away, I stuck with it. I stopped eating meat a long time ago, but with her I stopped eating even poultry. So right now my diet is basically seafood and vegetables. And people look at me like, ooh, that's all you eat? And I'm like, yeah. And it was like, so why didn't you go back? I was like, I've been with it and I wanted to stick with it. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:45:35 - 1:45:40) Yeah. Instead of saying, hmm, I should try that for 30 days and see how I feel. [Xavier Bowe] (1:45:40 - 1:45:50) No, but I've already ate meat, so I know what it tastes like. And I can cook meat for you. Just because I don't eat it doesn't mean I can't cook it, but I don't eat it myself. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:45:51 - 1:46:12) Yeah. Keep an open mind. Keep an open mind, people. Keep an open mind. It's so easy to just think your own ways and just stay in your own lane and what I say go, because it's just easy. Instead of having conversations, diving into something that's unfamiliar. [Xavier Bowe] (1:46:12 - 1:46:59) So it is easier for the- That brings me back to a story that I love from Ness Brown. He gives the story of the POW that dies in front of the firing squad because when the warden came that morning and said, hey, here's a door. I don't know where it leads to, but if you walk out of it, that's an option. Or you die by firing squad. And the guy was like, he took the firing squad and as he was being executed, the warden's secretary asked, what was behind the door? And he said, freedom. And Ness Brown spin the story as most of us die because we are so afraid of unknown heavens that we stick to our familiar hells. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:47:04 - 1:47:22) Okay. I'm going to end on that one. That was good, Xavier. That was good. We are afraid of the unknown and we'd rather just deal with the bullshit that we're used to. [Xavier Bowe] (1:47:23 - 1:48:09) Trust me, I did it. It was petrifying to move here with a five-year-old. I left everything in the Bahamas. I came here with one bag and a toolbox to go back to school at 32. Didn't know how I was going to pay for school. Didn't know how I was going to find somewhere to live, car, everything. But I remember that story from Ness Brown, unknown heavens and familiar hells. And at that point in time in my life, staying in the Bahamas would have been a familiar hell because it was all of the people that knew her that reminded me of what I lost and how they got to move on with their lives, with their loved ones. And I'm the only one stuck. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:48:17 - 1:48:31) Ness Brown, Jim Rohn, if you don't listen to him, I really encourage people to change their soundtracks that they play every day. [Xavier Bowe] (1:48:31 - 1:48:42) Oh, Jim Rohn keeps thinking. He says, you should throw out the trash, the love novels. He says, you have to stand guard at the gates of your mind. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:48:43 - 1:49:21) Yes. Every morning, that's what I listened to those two guys. So when you said that, it triggered something in me. My whole life, I've listened to it. And every morning, I'm listening to something Jim Rohn or Ness Brown. I guarantee it. Now I do listen to my crime novels, but my brain starts off with that. I don't know what the weather is. I do not listen to the news. I don't know who's been shot, who's been killed, what the president said. I don't know any of that. The first thing I put in my head is that in the days that I don't are jacked up days. [Xavier Bowe] (1:49:22 - 1:50:11) Yeah. That's why I've listened to Alex Amosie, Gary Vee, Dan Martell. And they all speak about the same thing, whether you're listening to Bob Proctor, Jim Rohn, Napoleon Hill. What I found is that there's a central thread through what everybody's saying. Whether it's the most common principle is pay yourself first. Because one of my favorite book, The Richest Man in Babylon, the biggest lesson that jumped out to me when I read the book was that never ask the brick maker about you, which means don't ask somebody who isn't a professional of what they do about what you want. So don't go to your doctor asking about how to fix your car. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:50:13 - 1:50:18) Don't get business advice just because that's your best friend. No. They just broke as you are. [Xavier Bowe] (1:50:19 - 1:50:30) And also they will poison you with their failures. They will tell you all of the reasons why you can't do it. And they will give you a PowerPoint presentation. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:50:32 - 1:50:39) I wouldn't do that if I were you. I don't know. I wouldn't do that if I were you. You're doing just fine where you at. [Xavier Bowe] (1:50:40 - 1:50:54) Les Brown said you got to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. And so that has been, like that's where I'm at right now. I felt like I had to remind myself that I have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable again because I got comfortable. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:50:56 - 1:50:58) I am very uncomfortable right now. [Xavier Bowe] (1:50:59 - 1:51:01) I'm not uncomfortable enough right now. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:51:01 - 1:51:21) I am so uncomfortable right now with this whole podcast situation and what I'm doing. And I have in two weeks, and of course this is going to take a little while to get out, my second ever class that I'm leading. I'm so uncomfortable, but I know if I don't do it, I'll never get to the other side of it. [Xavier Bowe] (1:51:22 - 1:51:37) That's a part of my journey too. What I want to do is I want to get to the point where I'm teaching and pouring into as well because that's a part of the journey for me to be able to- You've got the voice for it. Pass it on. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:51:38 - 1:52:11) You've got it. And I was talking to my sister. My sister's a nurse and she's come through every level of nursing. My sister is a badass. And she's had a whole lot of obstacles the whole way. And I told her this week, I said, Hey, Wanda, do you remember that man when we were growing up? There was a man and I can remember, I can't remember his face, but I remember he had this gold tooth in his mouth, but he would always call her the nurse and he would call me the teacher. So now I feel like I'm a teacher and it's so crazy, but it's uncomfortable. [Xavier Bowe] (1:52:14 - 1:52:42) That's what I loved about Toastmasters. I got- Why am I crying? Yeah. I got addicted to being uncomfortable because giving a speech in front of an audience was like, that's uncomfortable. But one thing I learned in Toastmasters is whenever you're giving a speech or talking about anything, remind yourself that your audience doesn't know what you're talking about. So they don't know if you made a mistake. Only you know if you made a mistake. So keep going. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:52:43 - 1:52:59) Yeah. Keep going. Keep going. All right. X, I've got to go. Let me get to South Carolina. This is one of my favorite conversations. And I will be getting on your nerves pretty soon. I'm your new best friend. [Xavier Bowe] (1:52:59 - 1:53:01) Okay. I appreciate it. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:53:01 - 1:53:08) And then we're going to make each other uncomfortable until we get to where we're going, wherever the heck that is. And when we get there, we're going to go some more places. [Xavier Bowe] (1:53:09 - 1:53:17) Well, Jim Rowan says, never let death find you sliding down an old mountain. Always let it find you climbing a new one. Yep. [Tonnika Haynes] (1:53:18 - 1:54:24) Knees scraped up and everything. Climbing a new mountain. All right. Well, you made me emotional because I'm just thinking about my journey and how uncomfortable I am but you ain't going to stop me. No, nobody can stop me. All right. So thanks for being on here. And like really this time, guys, we're going to end the conversation. Appreciate you following the podcast. Thank you for everything. Thank you for my haters in the comments. I love you too. Let the algorithm do its job. Peace out. See you next time. Downshift with Tanika is where we slow down long enough to have real conversations hosted by myself, second generation shop owner, Tanika Haynes. This goes beyond your car count, your KPIs. We want to talk about leadership, legacy, mindset, and the messy, beautiful journey of building something that lasts. You will hear stories from shop owners, technicians, and other industry leaders who are figuring it all out by themselves in real time. This is a space for growth, tough love, laughter, and leveling up.