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Have the Audacity to Believe in Yourself · The Nadia Chapman Show

• 0:02
  Welcome back to the Nadia Chapman Show. It is September 17th and it's the first evening,
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  where my windows are open and I can feel the cold, crisp autumn air,
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  which is such a blessing because if you are in Southern California,
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  as you know, it's been so hot,
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  and fall is by far my favorite season.
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  And now it starts to feel like fall, like autumn, like things are cooling off, finally.
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  And I'm so happy to be here with you this evening in front of my microphone.
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  The Nadia Chapman Show has become a place for real conversations and real growth,
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  honest conversations about mindset, courage, confidence, fears,
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  and just, you know, becoming the person you know you're capable of being.
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  It sounds cheesy, but that's what we do here.
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  And today we talk about something that sounds so simple and so silly,
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  but that can also feel incredibly uncomfortable. And that is having the audacity
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  to believe in yourself, no matter how old you are, no matter what you're trying to pursue.
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  And I use the word audacity with intention because believing in yourself can
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  feel almost kind of silly or rebellious, especially when you're trying to do
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  something that other people don't necessarily understand.
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  It takes a lot of audacity to say, I'm going to do this and I think I can do
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  this when you don't have any proof yet.
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  It takes audacity to keep pursuing something after maybe you failed or you struggled
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  or you embarrassed yourself or maybe you watch other people move ahead of you.
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  It takes a lot of audacity to believe that your life can become bigger and grander
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  and happier or even more meaningful than it is right now, especially when nobody
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  around you can see that vision yet.
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  If you know, you know. Most of us were never really taught how to believe in ourselves.
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  Go back to when you were a kid and go back over all the things,
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  all the weird ideas maybe that you had and people were like,
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  oh, maybe not so supportive of it.
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  You know, we were taught to be realistic. You need to be realistic.
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  You need to be careful, you know, to have a backup plan or to avoid looking
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  silly and foolish or, you know, we're taught to wait until we are qualified
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  or invited. or chosen or completely ready.
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  And listen, there's nothing wrong with being thoughtful, of course, or responsible.
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  We don't want to be irresponsible. But sometimes being realistic is just fear
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  wearing a very sensible outfit, like I say all the time. And sometimes that
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  little voice telling you, well, you need to be realistic.
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  It's actually the part of you that's terrified of being disappointed.
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  Because this is a hard truth. If you don't fully believe and you're not that
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  invested, well, maybe it's not going to hurt as much if things don't work out.
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  And maybe that's the router downer for today.
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  If you don't tell anyone what you maybe really want or really want to pursue,
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  well, nobody can judge you if you don't get it, right?
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  Like if you never take a chance, you never have to experience the rejection.
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  But you also never get to discover what could happen if you maybe just trusted
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  yourself enough to try and to keep going.
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  So believing in yourself doesn't mean that you know exactly how everything will work out.
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  It doesn't mean that you're certain that you will succeed, obviously,
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  on the first or second or third attempt.
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  And it definitely doesn't mean that you wake up every single morning feeling
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  all like, oh, I'm fearless and I'm confident and things are going to work out.
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  But believing in yourself means that somewhere beneath that fear,
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  beneath the doubt and the questions, there is still a voice saying,
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  you know what? Why not me?
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  Why couldn't I create something meaningful and something bigger than myself?
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  I can maybe surprise myself.
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  Why couldn't I become stronger or healthier or more successful or more fulfilled?
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  And maybe that voice is telling you, you know what? Why couldn't I become really,
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  really, really good at something, even if I'm not quite ready yet?
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  We're often so quick as human being to believe in other people.
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  You know, we cheer for everybody around us and people starting their business
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  or writing a book and chasing their dream and making a comeback.
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  And we see their potential before they see it themselves. A lot of the time, it's the way it is.
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  But when it comes to our own lives, suddenly, well, we require evidence.
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  We want some facts. You know, we want guarantees.
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  We want a step-by-step plan or we want confirmation that we won't fall and look
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  stupid and foolish or maybe waste too much time or lose too much money.
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  And we want to guarantee that, you know, we don't want to disappoint anybody around us.
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  But some of the most important decisions that you will ever make won't come
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  with guarantees. I'm going to tell you guys, sometimes you have to become your own evidence.
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  You have to decide to move before you feel ready.
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  And this is what I do in my coaching. I'm passionate about this topic.
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  You have to decide to take the leap, to take the step forward before you even feel ready.
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  You've got to act like the person you're becoming before you completely believe
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  that you are that person.
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  And that's how confidence is built. Not by sitting around waiting for it to
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  magically arrive, all right, but by collecting proof one at the time through
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  action, action after action, steps after step.
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  Every time that you show up when you say that you would, boom, you build evidence.
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  Every single time that you do something uncomfortable, you build evidence.
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  Every time that you survive a failure or recover from disappointment,
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  embarrassment, or speak up for yourself or try again, you build evidence and
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  you begin showing yourself. Oh, you know what? Maybe I can trust myself.
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  And that is self-belief. And self-belief isn't something that you either have
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  or you don't. You're not necessarily born with it. It's just some relationship
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  that you built with yourself.
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  And like any relationship, obviously, it is strengthened through honesty,
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  consistency, and trust.
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  So if you constantly break promises to yourself or speak to yourself like crap,
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  like garbage, and you have negative self-talk or you dismiss your own dreams
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  or allow fear to get in the way and make every decision,
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  it becomes very difficult to trust yourself, right?
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  But that trust can be rebuilt.
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  One single choice at the time.
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  One brave conversation, one boundary, one phone call, one workout,
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  one page written, one offer made, one moment when you choose, you know what,
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  I'm not going to abandon myself. So you don't need to transform your entire
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  life today. You simply need to make one decision that the version of you who
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  really believes in yourself or himself would make.
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  So ask yourself, if I really believe in myself, what would I do next? Hmm.
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  Not next month, not next year, not someday when life calms down,
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  not when everybody finally understands and approves. No, no,
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  no, no. What would you do next?
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  Would you finally put your work into the world? Would you raise your prices?
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  Would you leave something that has been making you, you know,
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  miserable and sad? Would you try out? Would you apply, audition,
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  compete, ask for the opportunity?
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  Would you finally stop shrinking yourself to make other people comfortable?
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  Here's something that I've learned over time and with the work I'm doing.
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  People don't always respond well when you begin believing in yourself.
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  And this is a harsh truth.
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  You know, your confidence may be called like arrogance by some people and the
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  new boundaries that you set might be called selfishness.
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  And of course, your ambition may make some people uncomfortable.
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  But the discomfort of people around you is not evidence that you're doing something
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  wrong and you're on the wrong path and you look like an idiot.
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  I'm going to tell you, you don't need everyone to understand your vision.
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  It wasn't given to everyone. It was given to, guess what? It was given to you.
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  And maybe that's what audacity really looks like. That's what it is.
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  It's allowing yourself to want more without apologizing for it.
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  It's refusing to let your past decide what you're allowed to.
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  Become in the future and really understanding that you can be scared and you
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  can be unprepared but you know what still take the leap take that step forward
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  all right what i want you to get out of this podcast is that.
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  Even if the plan changes, even when it takes longer than expected to get there,
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  and even if you stumble along the way, you can still figure it out.
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  Because believing in yourself, guys, isn't believing that you'll never fail,
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  all right? It's believing that failure will not be the end of you,
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  and that's a completely different thing, all right?
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  So you'll learn. Guess what? You'll adjust.
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  You'll get back up. you'll become wiser and stronger and more capable than ever before.
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  And maybe you don't even need more talent and maybe you don't even need another
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  certification or a course or this perfect moment or this new idea.
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  Maybe you need the audacity to take yourself seriously for once and for all. All right.
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  So stop talking yourself out of the very opportunities that you've been praying
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  for, or you've been asking for, and stop waiting for somebody else to kind of
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  look at you and say, yeah, you can do it. You know what?
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  Give yourself permission. Choose yourself.
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  Back yourself up. All right? Because I'm going to tell you something.
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  You are allowed to believe that there is something more available for you.
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  You are allowed to believe that you haven't reached your full potential and
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  your best chapter. Think about that for a second. It makes me excited.
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  You don't need to prove it to anybody today. All right. You just need enough
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  audacity, word of the day, audacity to take the next step.
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  So let me leave you with this today.
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  What if believing in yourself isn't embarrassing or unrealistic or arrogant? All right.
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  What if it's the most honest thing you can do for yourself right now?
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  And imagine for a second, what could change if for once you stop asking, oh, who am I to do this?
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  And start asking, who am I not to? Holy moly.
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  Thank you so much for spending this time with me today. If this episode spoke
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  to you, please send it to someone who needs a reminder to just believe a little
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  more boldly in themselves.
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  And wherever you are at right now, take one small step forward,
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  all right, towards the life that you keep wanting and keep imagining.
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  Until next time, keep showing up, keep doing the inner work,
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  guys, and keep becoming the person that you were always meant to be. You've got this.