Latest / The Inner Wealth Podcast / Ep247. Taking Up More Space: Expanding Your Nervous System Beyond Fear and Into Full Expression.

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Ep247. Taking Up More Space: Expanding Your Nervous System Beyond Fear and Into Full Expression. · The Inner Wealth Podcast

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: You might make up the money like this, something that's gonna be like you might be able to be to a state.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: When you want in your life or your life winning, I'm gonna keep going on how to 1920 to fight.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: Don't authentic millionaire.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: Don't get excited just to wake up.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'm helping to create real wealth to expect some freedom from the inside out.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Inner Wealth Podcast, where we learn and choose to live inspired each and every day.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: And we're back home.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_00: Home sweet home.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Last week was our Inner Wealth Mastermind retreat in Nashville, Tennessee.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I I did a the the episode was detailing the plans that I was that I had for the retreat.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: And and some of it went way according to plan, and some of it didn't.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to share with that with with you today.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: And some other revelations that have happened since then about what we actually did in that container and what we are doing going forward.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to put this, I want to like anchor uh all of the rest of what we're saying today in taking up more space in the world.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we're that that was the the, I guess, my main takeaway from the work that we did in in the uh retreat last week and what we're gonna focus on going forward.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's learning and stepping into a place of taking up more space in the world.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I'll share all about what that means.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: So the uh retreat, I want to recap.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: And the retreat set up really powerfully, and it was so much different than any retreat, mastermind retreat that we've ever had before.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: And a lot of the retreats that we've done in the past, they used to be focused a lot on meditation.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: So where I'd put them into uh visualization meditations, getting them into a new powerful future.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: I can still do that, but we didn't do any of that this time.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, shadow work, where we go into the deep dark recesses of things that you're looking to avoid in the in, you know, in your life and in the world, and and really start to um start to, I guess, get into that, feel it in your body, and begin to release it.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: Because if we don't, if we don't get into the shadows, then we'll never truly understand our light.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: Because our our shadows are where our power is most hidden.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: And we're gonna we're gonna get into that a lot, okay, over the course of this episode.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: So hold that thought because we did the same thing, we just did it differently.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: But we did no meditative activity.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: We had a lot of uh awesome and powerful discussion, a lot of sharing, more group sharing than ever before.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: But the work was more power, uh, more powerful and more liberating than we've ever seen from inside of the uh the Interwealth Mastermind uh retreat.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_00: And and really, and I'm talking on behalf of myself and Kara Dossi, our operations assistant, and Angie Kitko, uh, my wife, and uh the I guess event coordinator.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: This is why, you know, we we're so excited for future retreats and we love the retreat container so much, is because they are so so crucial and impactful to the work we get to do.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Because on the calls week to week, we we definitely connect and continue to connect, and there's accountability on the calls for the work that we're doing, but it's inside of the retreat container that the work actually happens and we start to leave a lot of the past in the past and take a whole new self into the future.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: And when we have workshops, uh, and I've got a new workshop that I'm kind of working up in my mind, but when we do workshops, we start the process of this, but it's within the retreats and in the mastermind itself, the meetings on a weekly basis, that we actually just keep that work going and keep the momentum going.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: So we did um the to start the retreat off, we did what we call a soul science day.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the soul sciences, I am a woo-woo motherfucker.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: I love the soul sciences.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: And it's, you know, there's a group of systems and so many more than I even know of, but a group of systems that uh, you know, like natal astrology, like um uh gene keys, human design, uh the uh soul contracts, Mayan astrology, the life you were born to live.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: There's so many different systems, numerology, there's so many different systems and different so many different platforms that you can use to really understand yourself at a much, much deeper level.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I love these systems because so everything, all evolution, all healing, all personal development, all spiritual development, all spiritual growth starts with deepening our self-awareness and understanding who we are, who we who we aren't, who we thought we should be, and like what parts of us are not a fit that we're just like there, we're just playing a role, we're just playing a character in the world, and we just get to leave a part of that behind because it's not who we really are.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: And when you get into the soul sciences and you get into the NATO astrology, chin keys, human design, you start to really understand what you're here, like your design and your essence, what you're designed to be in the world, uh, what your purpose is in the world, like what what is the purpose of your life?
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: Because everyone is on time and on purpose.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: Your your life is not a coincidence, you're not a mistake.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: There's a liter legitimate purpose in your life.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: And uh, and when you find that purpose, if you don't know if you you know your purpose or not, you don't.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: Because once you understand your purpose, it's not something you question.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: And then ultimately your destiny, where the where the energy in your life is going.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: The energy, life is trying to get you somewhere.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes we fight that that current so hard because we don't know where it's taken us and we're so scared that we don't trust life.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: And if we just surrendered to the flow of life, then life takes us to beautiful, beautiful places that we can't possibly get there by not trusting life.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: So we started there on Soul Science Day, and really, you know, we we have like this morning.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm recording this on Wednesday, the day before the publication of this.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, this morning on our Soul Science study call in the mastermind, we studied, you know, certain placements in gene keys.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: And and and we have large studies where it goes over, you know, the course of 18 weeks, we study a system.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: But literally on that Wednesday to start the uh the kickstart, the mastermind retreat, what we focused on were three placements.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: Now we did something complete, I did, I led something completely different than I've ever led before.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_00: We focused on three placements in natal astrology: the natal Saturn, natal Pluto, and natal Chiron.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: Now let me explain what these are.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: Natal Saturn is where when you're out of alignment, life starts to squeeze on you and it creates some compression.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_00: It creates some pressure.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's almost life, like life is squeezing you to try to get your attention.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: It creates a little more pressure, a little more stress, a little more tension in you because it's really trying to get your attention, get you into alignment.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: Then when you do get into alignment, like Saturn lets up on you a little bit.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: And when Saturn lets up on you a little bit, things start to open up and and the uh Saturn and Jupiter are working together, where when you're not in your Jupiter, Saturn starts to constrict on you.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: And when you start to get more and more into your Jupiter, Saturn lets up on you.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so it's a pressure point within your your uh your natal astrology chart and your design, and that's the important part, and a pressure point inside of your design.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: So so we understood our Saturn and everybody, we pulled all the natal charts for everybody in the in the retreat, and we explored our natal Saturn together.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: And we started like there were ajas and epiphanies and awarenesses and awakenings, and it was all awesome, awesome.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: The second part, the second uh thing that we explored was our natal Pluto.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: And Pluto is the is the planet of transformation.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: Now, Pluto is like a motherfucking wrecking ball.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: Pluto comes in and anything that's out of alignment, it destroys.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't care how it feels.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_00: Pluto doesn't care about your happiness, it doesn't care about your wealth, it doesn't care about your freedom, it doesn't care about anything in your life.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: Pluto is literally a wrecking ball.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: And anywhere you are out of alignment and off your most purposeful path, it will destroy whatever's in its way to get you onto your purpose and onto your path.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: And this is why I lost two jobs in between 2014 and 2016.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_00: I lost two jobs.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: Pluto didn't, I was so far out of alignment, Pluto didn't give a fuck if I was happy, or if I was full of pressure, or if I was full of stress, or if I was scared, or Pluto didn't give a fuck.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: Pluto had a mission and it was to get me onto my purpose and onto my path.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: And it did a great job, but it wasn't fucking fun and it wasn't easy, and Pluto is not a gentle placement.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: So we studied our Pluto, and there were again a lot of aha's and epiphanies and oh my goodnesses and awakenings and like realizations of where some of this stuff is starting to has been, you know, for decades, has been in influence and where, you know, where it's made some changes or where somebody's even fought these things.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: The third placement we dove into is Chiron.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: Now, Chiron's called the wounded healer, and although it's not a planet, it is a body that that has some influence and sometimes some control over our life.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_00: But it's all for the good.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: All of the all three of these are for our benefit, but they're not very, mm, they're not very enjoyable placements.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: Tyran is the wounded healer.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: Each each person in uh that is born has a deep, deep subconscious wound.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: And it's by and and it's it typically you don't even know you're wounded in this area until you discover it.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_00: And when you are wounded in a in a way, your life is spent resolving that wound.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: And if you've ever heard, your greatest pain becomes your greatest source of purpose.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: Your greatest pain becomes your highest expression of power in the world.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: That is Chiron in a nutshell, the wounded healer, where you are wounded, and as you learn how to heal that in yourself, then you also have something to give other people.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: And again, as we explored our Chiron, light bulbs were going off and people were understanding.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: And taking those three in place or together, you've got a source of contraction and compression in the world and Saturn, you've got this wrecking ball of Pluto, and you've got this wound that you're looking to heal and to give away the healing of this.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: Give away is your Nato Chiron.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's what started.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: So we we started off.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, we're not gonna explore some of the happier parts of life.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: We are literally here this weekend or this week to explore the shadows and the darkness and all the shit that's buried in you that you've been facing your whole life, that you haven't had the courage to shine a light on and really step into your power.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: I also with I I didn't give them fair warning.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: Let me just say this.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't give them fair warning that I was going to spend the next few days making them radically uncomfortable so that we could start to break through the grip that Saturn, Pluto, and Chiron had over them.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: But it it took getting into a place of discomfort because your comfort zone is reflective of where these boundaries are in place so that Saturn to try to avoid the influences of Saturn, Pluto, and Chiron.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: So the very first time I was given a chance, there was there was one when I when I explained these three, and and man, I love my students, I really do.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: And and I I would never intentionally hurt my students, all right?
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_00: But when when I shared these, there was one of our students that walked over to me and got as close to me, pretty much as close to me as he could, and he whispered, you know, and this is when we were kind of on a break, and he whispered, he said, Mike, what am I supposed to do with these?
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I gently stopped and I called the room to attention and I said, Hey, everybody, uh, got a question.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: And pay attention.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody be quiet, lock your eyes on, and and I named, I named the person because I I want him to say his question out loud.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: And and then he like gently and timidly expressed his question.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, Louder, say it louder, say it louder.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: And you can literally see the student start to get really fucking pissed and really angry.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: And this is when I realized, guys, I hadn't done a good job of setting up the work that we were there to do this weekend or that week.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: I keep saying weekend because our intensives are on the weekend and our retreats are during the week.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: But I hadn't properly done a great job.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: And that's when I call kind of called time out and said, guys, I want to demonstrate something why we're here and why I just challenged you the way I challenged you.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I know you're angry at me, but just stick in there for a second and I'm gonna show you what we're here to do and why I just challenged you in a way that really, really fucking pissed you off, right?
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: Made you angry.
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I went upstairs and I got my Speedo on and I had it under my clothes and nobody knew.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_00: And we videoed it, I set up the video camera, and I and I explained, guys.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you've listened, if you listen to last week, last week's episode, you'll understand.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_00: If not, go back and listen to last week's episode and you'll understand that you know what I'm getting ready to share.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: But I said, listen, my whole life I've hid my body.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: All right, I've hid my body, I've hid it away.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: It's had massive, massive impacts on my life.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I went over all the different, you know, elements of impact, negative impact that it's had, where I've hidden, where I've hid myself away, where I've where I've not shown up, where I've kept myself like clothed because of shame, and I kept myself bathed in shame, and I didn't allow myself to experience certain things in life all because I was ashamed of my body.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, right now I'm getting ready to do something that's the most uncomfortable thing that I've ever done in my life.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I I've been in Marine Corps boot camp and that was freaking strugglicious.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: I've jumped out of an airplane and that was fucking frightening as all get out.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm getting ready to do what I feel is probably even more fearful than either of those.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: And I took off my clothes and I just stood there in front of them in my rainbow speedo.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I just I opened my arms, I opened my arms, that's important, and we're gonna get to that.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I just showed them my body and we sat in silence for a little bit, and they all started clapping.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: And and I turned around and showed them my back and my behind, and I let every ounce of my skin be exposed, except for Nospito, right?
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: I wanted to keep it illegal, but I allowed everything about me to be seen.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: There were there was nothing covering up my my gun laps, nothing covering up my my man boobs, nothing covering up my stretch marks, nothing covering up any of it.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: My whole body was exposed, and you they could literally see my body shaking because I was so fucking scared and I felt so vulnerable, so seen, and so yeah, vulnerable.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I had never ever exposed myself to that level of vulnerability in the world.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I shared with them my greatest freaking fear, and I allowed them to share that experience with me.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_00: And they started clapping and applauding, and like they held space for me and allowed me to just be seen, to start to work through the fear of being seen.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: And over the course of time, it took a while, it took a little bit, but my nervous system started feeling more and more comfortable standing there in front of the whole room in a rainbow speedo.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: And that's when I started teaching about in order to, you've got this darkness inside of us.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_00: We've got, we've got this compression of Saturn, we've got Pluto's destruction and death and rebirth, we've got this wound of Chiron.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I was showing them literally, like they didn't, they couldn't see it at that moment.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_00: But the speedo that I was wearing and the and the body shame that I held was my Chiron, which was my Chiron in Aries in the 12th house in Natal Astrology, which is the most hidden, deepest wound of the self.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's feeling like there's your even existence is broken, that there's nothing right with you, that you're broken at broken as an individual.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_00: You're fundamentally flawed to such a degree that you you are insignificant and meaningless.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what Chiron and Ares in the 12th house, that's the lesson that it brings.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: And this is one of the reasons with the wounded warrior why I've I've spent my whole life trying to get everyone to accept and embrace and love themselves.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_00: Because the wound I have and I carry around is this unconscious, subconscious rejection of my being that I don't want anybody else to experience.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_00: And that is Chiron in action.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: The wound that I'm carrying around is the healing that I provide to others.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_00: And authenticity, we're gonna come back to this, authenticity and showing up authentically and revealing all aspects of yourself is the greatest salve, is the greatest remedy to feeling fundamentally flawed and broken.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: That is Chiron in motion, the wound that I carry around, bringing the light, the exact opposite light into the world, the darkness inside of me, creating light in the world.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_00: And I was in that example with the with the Speedo, I was helping them see that right then and there in that moment, I was making myself uncomfortable because I was tired of hiding.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: And if I keep hiding, if I always do what I always did, I'll always get what I always got.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: And in order to grow, in order to evolve, in order to step out of the shadows and into the light, we have to allow ourselves to get radically uncomfortable because that's how we start to expand the nervous system, to be able to take up more space in the world and to be able to live a fuller, more rich, more alive, more meaningful, more significant, more powerful life.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: But if we always do what we always did, we'll always get what we always got.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_00: And oftentimes when we're a slave to our nervous system and we're only trying to do things that are comfortable, we're keeping ourselves in a little box.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_00: And that was my demonstration.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the student that I challenged didn't quite understand yet.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_00: But over the next two days, they were going to.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: Because there was about six or seven students that literally, you could say they were, and I'm air quoting, they were on the hot seat, but they shared this deep dark fear, insecurity, inadequacy, this these things of insignificance that had consumed them and choked the life out of them for every second that they've been alive.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: Whether it be someone's sexuality, whether it be someone being a leader of men that was a not an alpha male, but a sigma male.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_00: And if you don't know what a sigma male is, look it up.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not going to go into it, but it's not an alpha male, which is an alpha asshole that has to be dominant.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's not a beta that is submissive.
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's a sigma male that owns his own power and provides, protects, and never, never leads through intimidation, through insecurity, through dominance, but only leads through kindness, but is also lethal to the motherfucking core to Sigma male.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I was in a room full of them.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: Whether it be the guy in the room that was a Sigma male that was struggling to step into leadership of other Sigma men of other men to help create more Sigma men and Sigma, healthy Sigma, Sigma Men in this world.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you had you had someone who was has never felt fulfillment in their career and they were highly accomplished, but they've never ever felt fulfilled.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: Finally stepping into a place of allowing their bodies to feel fulfilled and finally, finally feeling something that they've always yearned for.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: And all of these things came with tears and fears and And shame.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: There were, I believe, six or seven of them in total.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm gonna tell you about the one that most shows how all of this work helps you take up more space.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: There was there was a gal in our in our retreat.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: And she's always shown up timid, quiet, reserved, compressed, small.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: When you when you look at when you look at how she carries herself, she carries herself contracted and constricted.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's like she tries to make herself as small as possible.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: Her voice is really low.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: She doesn't, she's not assertive in her in her speaking.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's almost like she's always trying to hide.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: She's always looking for something, whether it be a pillow, whether it be, you know, I don't know.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: There's always something.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: She's always trying to hide behind a person or behind a screen, but she's always trying to hide.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: And in our retreat, I asked her to stand up.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: And she's really struggled to feel like she's deserved anything into her in her life.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_00: She provides what she feels that other people deserve, high levels of what other people deserve, but she's never really fully allowed herself to feel like she deserves anything in life.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I asked her to get in the center of the room.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I asked her to put her hands in a V way above her head.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_00: And what that is, it's the sign of the body, the physical change that signals that I am taking up more space in the world.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, think of like a jumping jack where you had your legs spread out, you know, in a V and a downward V and your hands.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm doing it on the video, I'm doing it.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: Your arms are in an upward V.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I asked him to get into a center of the room.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, put your hands up in the air, put them in a V.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: And literally, I'm gonna explain this the best I can.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: She literally raised them.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe she got her elbows to her shoulders, and then she dropped them immediately because she was afraid to take up more space.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, No, raise your hands in the air.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_00: And little by little she raised them up.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, and and and they still weren't like assertively up, like all the way up.
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're watching the video, I'm I'm sure she she was like really struggling to get her hands up high because she's never really allowed herself to take up any real space in this world.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_00: She's always allowed everybody else to take up space, but she's never allowed herself to step into it.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_00: And I I asked her, I said, tell me what you deserve.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: Tell us what you deserve.
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_00: And and when she said, uh, like I deserve love, and she said it really timidly.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_00: I said, louder.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_00: And she said it a little louder, louder.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_00: She said it a little louder, but her voice wasn't getting that high.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_00: I said, raise your hands up in the air as high as you can get them.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: And she raised them up high.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: And then when I looked around the room, everybody in the room had their hands raised up high.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: I said, turn around, do a 360.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: Look at what everybody's doing.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_00: And I never asked anybody to raise their hands.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: I said, turn around, look at everybody.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: We're here with you.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_00: We're here for you.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: We're here.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: We're we're in this with you.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_00: Raise your hands as high as you can get them.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: What do you deserve?
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, I deserve love.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_00: What else do you deserve?
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: I deserve acceptance.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_00: What else do you deserve?
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_00: And her voice started getting a little, little higher, but she wasn't screaming.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: She still wasn't screaming.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_00: She was getting more and more assertive.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm probably being more assertive, way more assertive than she was, and way more intense and way more loud.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_00: But little by little, her voice started getting a little more.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: I said, spin around, look at everybody.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: What do you deserve?
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_00: And little by little she started saying it.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_00: And less and less her voice cracked, and more and more her arms went up.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_00: And it still was, she still wasn't yelling, and she still wasn't super assertive.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_00: But you could tell that she was really fucking uncomfortable and she was there and she started struggling for words.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: I said, feel free to repeat the words.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't matter.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: The words don't matter.
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_00: What do you deserve?
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to feel what you deserve.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to reshape your nervous system, to accept and embrace what you deserve and take up more.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't say this, but what I was calling her into is take up more space in the world.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: Because I hadn't explained to anybody why they had their hands up.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_00: Foolish me.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: But little by little her voice started going up.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_00: And at the end, after about 10 minutes of this, I said, How do you feel?
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, a lot lighter.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, you're not the same person anymore.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: And we all clapped and we all applauded.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, from that, from that moment, for the rest of the retreat, she would crack these little jokes and she would, she would fit these little jokes in the most perfect place.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_00: And she turned out that her voice was freaking delightful.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: And that the insights that she had, and the little jabs, and the little digs, and the little insights were freaking comical.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_00: But she spent her whole life not talking because she didn't want to take up too much space.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: She didn't want to be seen.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: She didn't want to be the center of attention.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_00: She just wanted to hide.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_00: But she turned out to be freaking delightful and funny.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_00: And we got to see that and experience it.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_00: Now, that was the first day.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_00: And that was good.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_00: But the next day we came back.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_00: And she was part of another exercise where somebody else was working through things.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_00: But I invited her back to the middle of the room.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: And this was for me the most rewarding, fulfilling part of the whole retreat.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_00: Is I in the second day, we only had two days, I put her back in the middle of the room.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_00: I said, Now raise your hands above your head.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: And she literally threw them up in the air with no hesitation and with no problem.
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, What do you deserve?
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_00: And she started claiming what she deserved with a level of assertiveness that didn't exist the day before.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_00: And the reason being is because from that first exercise, she started to release some of the pressure, the stress, the tension, the semskaras.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you read my book, Inner World, Outer World, I explained what semskaras are.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_00: She started to let go of some of the shadows that were contained within her body, within her nervous system.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_00: And even overnight, her body released some of that shit.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_00: Over the course of the night, her sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system started to rewire themselves so that she wasn't in fight, flight, or freeze mode just like she was the day before with this same exercise.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_00: And her level, her voice started reaching levels of assertiveness that she had never, ever experienced because of one simple exercise.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_00: And the point of all of that was in order to do what you haven't yet done, in order to achieve what you haven't yet achieved, you need to be willing to do things that your nervous system might not be comfortable doing.
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_00: And if you want to take up more space in the world, if you want to be more fulfilled, if you want to be wealthier, if you want to be more successful, if you want to feel more significance, if you want to be valued more in the world, if you want to be more impactful in the world, then you must be willing and able to take up more space.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_00: And it's not just about being able to get into a room in the middle of the room with your arms raised and with your voice claiming what you deserve.
• 30:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's about so much more than that.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I've I'm gonna end this podcast episode and we'll dive into this maybe next week.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the five things that I've come up with because I this sent me on a path.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_00: What does taking up more space in the world mean?
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_00: And here's what I came up with five things that we get to step into in order to take up more space in the world.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_00: Number one is be authentic and fully expressed with full authority and allow yourself to evolve.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_00: You are never the same person from day to day.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_00: Who you are, what you identify with, how you identify yourself changes from day to day.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's up to you to be the full, fullest expression of all of that without holding yourself back at all.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_00: If you can't fully express yourself, then you're not fully taking up the space you deserve.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_00: Number two, loosen the grip of the fear of judgment and criticism.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_00: Listen, when you speak your truth, in order to do number one, to be fully expressed, you're going to speak your truth.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_00: And not everyone's going to agree.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_00: And it's going to come with some criticism.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's going to come with some sense of judgment.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_00: You must be willing to stand in that criticism and judgment and not shrink.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_00: Doesn't mean it's going to be comfortable all the time.
• 31:43
  SPEAKER_00: It means that you don't let the discomfort inside of you bring you off your truth.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_00: Number three, develop the courage to be disliked.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_00: Not everyone is going to like the new version of you.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, the more you step into your light, the more people, other people are going to experience and see their shadows.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: When they see you start to live soul out, when they see you start to shine your light, when they see you start to express yourself fully and be okay with being judged and being criticized, they're going to see where they're not.
• 32:20
  SPEAKER_00: And it's going to create guilt and that shame in them.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_00: And they are not going to like you.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_00: But in order to be fully, fully loved, you must give up the chase and the desire to be liked.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_00: And what I mean when I say to be loved, love stands for letting others voluntarily evolve.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_00: And you're here, likely, if you're like me, you're here to be loved by a few, not liked by the masses.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_00: The people that know all the parts of me and accept me, they're the ones in this world that love me, and those are the ones that I get to love all over.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_00: Number four, allow yourself to be seen without collapsing.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_00: Listen, this has been a point for me when the inner wealth mastermind built to 75 people and we had 55 people.
• 33:19
  SPEAKER_00: We had 13 people in Nashville.
• 33:21
  SPEAKER_00: And at one point we had 55 people in the inner wealth uh mastermind retreat in Miami, Florida a couple years ago.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_00: And let me tell you, it was too much.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_00: It was too much for me.
• 33:30
  SPEAKER_00: My nervous system couldn't handle it.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_00: I collapsed.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_00: That was too much visibility, too many, too many sets of eyes on me.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_00: Too many people watching me, right?
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_00: And my nervous system collapsed under the weight.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: And just because there are more eyes on you doesn't mean you have to assume more burden or more responsibility or that you need to be different.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: Okay?
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's okay to be seen and to stand in your power and let them witness you for who you are, not who they think they think you are.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_00: Who they think you are doesn't matter.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_00: Let them see who you really are.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_00: And the more eyes, the better.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_00: Because that's when you get to see how how trigger-proof your nervous system really is with visibility and higher states of visibility.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_00: And fifth, is share your gifts boldly and receive admiration and recognition graciously.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_00: When someone gives you a compliment, thank them.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_00: When somebody says your work has changed their life, thank them.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_00: When somebody says that your light is a bright spot in their life, thank them.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_00: Be willing, whatever it is, whatever that genius, and you have it, whatever that genius is inside of you that you have, that you possess, that you were designed with, that's part of your purpose and part of your mission.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: Share that with the world and share it shamelessly with the world.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_00: And then when they admire you, when they thank you, when they revere you, accept their admiration, their love, accept their compliments graciously.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because you are here to not only give away your greatest gifts, but to receive the love that comes with giving away those gifts.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_00: Guys, five, five tenets of authenticity.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_00: Be authentic and fully expressed with full authority and allow yourself to evolve.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: Loosen the grip and uh of the fear of judgment and criticism.
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_00: Develop the courage to be disliked, allow yourself to be seen without collapsing, and share your gifts boldly and receive admiration and recognition graciously.
• 35:53
  SPEAKER_00: Guys, I hope this helped because those five things will help you take up more space in the world.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_00: And the 13 people that were in the inner wealth mastermind retreat in Nashville, Tennessee, trust me when I say, and I've connected with most of them this week, they are taking up more space in the world.
• 36:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's because they stopped playing to protect their nervous system, and now they're playing to expand it.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_00: Comfort or growth, you can't have both.
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_00: Lean into the discomfort.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_00: Grow your comfort zone by always challenging it and stepping into discomfort.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_00: That is how you're going to take up more space in the world.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_00: And that is what you and everybody who you love and who loves you.
• 36:40
  SPEAKER_00: That's what everyone deserves.com for more tools and resources.