Latest / Dear Chelsea / Nineteen with Ziwe

Transcript

Nineteen with Ziwe · Dear Chelsea

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hi Catherine, Hi Chelsea.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Can you see my background in Whistler? Do you see
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: how beautiful it is here? It's a snow blizzard.
• 0:08
  Speaker 3: It's a blizzard.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: It's like the snow is falling so softly behind you.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: It looks like a quaint little town because there's snow
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: on the rooftime it.
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: Is it is.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: Do you know I first saw I'm sick. I'm still
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: sick from the last time I saw you. I've been
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: sick for a month straight.
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: I don't know what. I think. I have monkey pocks.
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: I don't know what is wrong with me.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: So excuse my sniffling everyone, but I can't get well.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: And you know what the cutest thing was yesterday what
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: my friends. I was having dinner with my girlfriends here.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: I have a crew here, you know. My whole family
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: was here for a week, and then my two my
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: nieces stayed here for another five days. And my one
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: niece woke me up at three in the morning. I
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: feel a tap on my shoulder and Seneca's like, Chelsea,
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: I've been throwing up all night. And I was like,
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: what the fuck am I supposed to do about it?
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: And so of course I got up. I'm in my
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: bra and underwear. I put her in my bathroom. She's
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: still throwing up. I'm trying to shove a zofran down
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: her throat. I'm like, here, fucking swallow this. And you know,
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: when someone's bobbiting, you can't, like they can't even drink anything.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: And I'm sitting on the side of my bathtub in
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: my bra and underwear, and I'm like, thank God, this
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: isn't my life, you know, like I don't even know
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: what to do. So I'm just sitting there watching her vomit.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: And then I get into my bed and I'm like, okay, Senny,
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: you know, come in my bed. I moved over. She
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: got into my bed and stayed in my bed for
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: twenty four hours, and I'm like, oh, this is what
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: it must be like to be a mother. Yes, but
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: I guess I caught whatever she got. And then my
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: other niece, Charlie was here. She's a dream boat too,
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: She's skiing like a maniac. But we didn't have a
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: lot of snow, and so it was kind of depressing.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: There was enough snow to ski, but you can't ski
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: in or like to the bottom of the hill, and
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: it was a little light and now we are in
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: full blizzard mode. So as soon as we are done
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: with today's episode, I am getting my boots on and
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: I am taking my sick ass out on the slopes.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: Amazing. Just drink a lot of bone broth when you
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: get back.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: I'm going to bring a campbel back of bone broth
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: on the mountain. But I've just been I love it
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: here so much. I can't tell you the unadulterated joy
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: I feel. I'm sitting here. I write my book. Every
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: day I'm write working so hard on my new book.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: Everyone is going to be well. I mean, I hope
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: everyone's going to love it, because I'm starting to love it.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: I'm sure they will. Actually, you know what, speaking of books, Well,
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: first of all, I'm curious if you've been reading anything.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: But I've gotten a few emails asking where people can
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: find the books that we talk about on the show,
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: and I usually try to pop those into the show notes.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: So for anybody who's wondering where can I am listening
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: in my car and you guys mentioned a book and
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: I don't remember what it was, go ahead and look
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: in the description of the show and you'll usually find
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: the book that we were chatting about.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: I just started this book that Tanner gave me called
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Cassantra at the Wedding by Dorothy Baker. Anyway, it's really good.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: It's about sisters. It's a short book. You know, when
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: I'm writing a book, I don't read as much, so
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: that's been an issue. So this morning I got up
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: and read two chapters of it because I was like,
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: I need to.
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: Be reading while I'm writing.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: I don't like when I don't read for long periods
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: of time, and when I come to Whistler kind of
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: avoid the news and I avoid, well, all things that
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: are real.
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: So I'm just in like this fantasyland.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: It's like your Disneyland.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: I'm coming home tomorrow because no one needs to watch
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: the Critics' Choice Awards on Sunday night that I'm hosting,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: and I cannot wait.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Yay, that's gonna be so exciting.
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: I have watched every single movie. Oh my god, I've won.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: There are so much horniness in the movies this year.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: So many penises, so many pres theses.
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: Horniness. Queerness is great. There's tons of horniness, queerness everything.
• 3:29
  Speaker 4: It makes me horny to watch all these movies. I
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: can't wait to get on stage and talk about it.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: Do you have a favorite or a couple of favorites.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: Saltburn was pretty twisted, and I like that it was
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: like kind of a modern day talented mister Ripley, you know.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: It was a little analogous to that. So I liked
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: that a lot. I really liked Oppenheimer. I mean it's
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: really long. Killers of the Flower Moon took me about
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: seven hours to watch it, and it was three and
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: a half hours long because I had to take breaks.
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think Saltburn is the most compelling.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: I watched Stranger from Us all of us Strangers, yes,
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: all of us strangers.
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: That guy in it, I love him so much.
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: He's so sexy, and it's a really sexy gay love story.
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: And it's nice to be straight and appreciate gay sexy
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: love stories.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Yes indeed, and like sometimes they're a little sexier.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I know. I was like, should I master base?
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: I'm like, don't get carried away? And then wait, what
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: else happened?
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: Oh?
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: I have my little baby here, my buddhas you know,
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: Kelly's daughters are here.
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: That's just so fun.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: I just am like, I love being a stepfather to them,
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: and we announced some new shows. We announced shows in Australia,
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: and we announced a really fun show that I'm doing
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: with Fortune Fimster and Mateo Lane and Sam Jay at
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: the YouTube Theater in May for the Netflix as a
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: Joke Festival in Los Angeles. So get your tickets for
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: that because that's about to sell out and that is
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: going to be a wild night and Vanessa's going to
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: be there as well. And then yeah, I've added five
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: dates in New Zealand and Australia.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: I have Canadian dates coming up.
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: I'm going to be January nineteenth in Edna and then
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Saskatoon and I'm coming to Colonna all over Winter Vancouver, Colonna, Calgary.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: So yes, please go to Chelseahandler dot com get your
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: tickets because everything is almost sold out. So maybe I'll
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: be adding second shows, but I'm not sure we'll see
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: I like my winter time.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: Did you wind up getting a new dog?
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: Did that wind up? Or didn't you know? I rode up?
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: I got that CO two treatment on my face, which
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: we should show a picture of at some point, even
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: though this is a podcast, because I looked like Mike
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: Tyson just got done with me. I got a CO
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: two treatment. I drove from Los Angeles to Whistler.
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: Huh.
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: So it was like two and a half day drive
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: that I cause I took my time. And I stopped
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: in Bend, Oregon to visit a friend of mine, Melissa,
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: and she saw my face and she's like, holy shit,
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: what the fuck did you do? And I was like, listen,
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: I have done a lot of shit in my face.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: This one was otherworldly. I looked crazy. Not only was
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: I black and blue, I.
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: Was bleeding and swollen.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: God, and so like this seven top layers of your
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: skin just start peeling off after like day three. So
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: I'm driving and there's just like little gray matter all
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: over my seat, like when your clothes shed Like I
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: was shedding like a reptile. It was so disgusting. But meanwhile,
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: my face is like a baby's ass.
• 6:16
  Speaker 5: Now.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, but the skin is so sensitive under my eyes.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: She really zapped me under my eyes for my crows feet.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: I like to keep my crows feet around you, notice,
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: to stay grounded.
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: I don't want to botox those or anything.
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you gotta just like look like a human.
• 6:28
  Speaker 5: You know.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: It's a little light, But I am excited about my
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: dresses for this Sunday because they are. I didn't know
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: if I was gonna be able top last year's outfit
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: changes for the Critics' Choice Awards because I was really
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: happy with my dresses last year, and you know, I
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: don't really give a shit that much about clothing, but
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: I am fucking banging it out again this year.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: It looks so good last year. Are you able to
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: give us like a preview of like, are they Barkley?
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: Do you have color all the abode?
• 6:52
  Speaker 5: No?
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: I don't wear sparkles, Catherine. You know better than that.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: I don't wear sparkles. Like I like color one color,
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: one dress, and I like to show.
• 6:59
  Speaker 3: My body off.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: There you go, my bottom, My choice excellent, Chelsea. Are
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: you Are you a resolutions person? Is that something that
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: you get into at the beginning of the year.
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: No, I'm not. I mean I think it's I don't know.
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: I don't like when everybody's doing everything is something you know,
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: you know how I feel about trendiness. I don't like
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: New Year's resolutions. I just get better every year, and
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: we all should be getting better every year.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: Honestly, That's what I kind of realized a few years ago.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: I mean, I would set these like grandiose resolutions, and
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: then I would realize at the end of the year, like, oh,
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: I actually like started doing a few of those things,
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: even though I thought I didn't do the resolution because
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: I didn't I wasn't real strict about it. But like
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: after a few years, I'm like, oh, I'm actually like
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: doing these things I wanted to do on a regular pas.
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I mean we can always. I mean, I'm
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: always just trying to improve.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: I mean sometimes I take a couple of breaks, you know,
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: but I've been better, Like I had family around me
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: for three weeks straight. I had guests and family because
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: I had some friends come up too, And you know,
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: I did that in my Orca this summer, and I
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: just know my patience has gotten so much better. You know,
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: when they leave, I do have to take like a
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: Xanax and sleep for fucking twelve hours or actually I
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: slept for twenty hours the other day.
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: I woke up, took some night well and went right
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: back to sleep. Perfect.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: But you know, my patience has got is improved. My
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: self awareness is on point. I'm aware, I'm calm, I
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: don't yell at people anymore.
• 8:18
  Speaker 3: So like I'm I'm happy with myself. That's really good.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: And I would imagine too, like, since your patience has
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: gotten better, everyone around you is having a better time,
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: but you're also having a better time.
• 8:28
  Speaker 3: Yes, I'm having a better time, and I'm also enjoying.
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: I always used to like imagine when I was younger,
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: the kind of aunt I would be, Like I wanted
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: to be this like bad ass woman that my nieces
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: and nephew's looked up to and came to.
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: And that's happening.
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: They come to me for advice, and they tell me secrets,
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: and they tell me things that they don't tell their moms.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: And my sisters are probably both listening and wondering what.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: But that, you know, it makes me feel so good
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: to like have these relationships in my life with children,
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: and at this age because they're all getting older now,
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: you know, they're not like eighteen, nineteen, twenty somethings, and
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: now we can have like adult relationships, and I just
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: I love that. And I my relationship with my sisters
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: has always been really good. And I had a great
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: time with my brother this year. I mean, there were
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: a lot of mushrooms going around in our family, A
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: lot of mushrooms, a lot of edibles were that kind
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: of family. We had a dinner out where it was
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: just a complete disaster. We could not stop laughing for
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: about three hours. So, I mean, this is kind of
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: what I dreamt about, you know, Like I wanted, I
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: wanted a big family like this, but I didn't want
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: to make one, and I have one, you know, Like
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: I didn't want to make my own, but I took
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: what I had and we all like come together and
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: we have. There's so many of us now with the
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: kids and their boyfriends and their girlfriends, and it's just awesome.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: Well, I think when you imagine something the way you
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: had been, you see it in your minds eye, it's
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: so much more likely to come to fruition to actually happen,
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: you know, and yeah, made that happen in your life.
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's a it's you know, manifestation can sound
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: like such a corny word sometimes because it's like, but
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: so many of the things that have happened in my
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: life are have been manifested by me unconsciously or subconsciously,
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: you know, like I've just always envisioned. Okay, you know,
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: when I grow up, I want to have a skihouse.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: I want to have this, I want to do.
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: These things, like you know, and and and to feel
• 10:25
  Speaker 3: really secure. I feel very.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: Secure and I feel calm. I've started working with a
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: new therapist, a woman. Fun yeah, because I wanted some
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: like feedback on some things, and so it felt really good.
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: To reach out to a new therapist.
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: That felt really empowering to know that I needed someone
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: to talk to that was outside of my circle. And
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: I've been working with her and she's a real like
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: very different than my previous therapist, which is good because
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: I you know, I've I did that and I wanted
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: something different and a different fresh eyes on something.
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: And so that's been good.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: And my kind of approach with everything like romantic liaisons
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: and men and all of it, I have. I feel
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: really good about all of that stuff that's happening too,
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: Like I'm open to love, but I really like I'm
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: also open to casual encounters with lots of different men.
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: And there's nothing wrong with that. They're like, that's fun
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: to have a guy in a place and to have
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: another guy in another place, and to be honest and upfront,
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: never lie about what you're up to, but to have
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: an understanding like, yeah, we're friends and we're going to
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: have sex. And we're friends and we're gonna have sex,
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: and this is going to be a romantic relationship and
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: it's not going to be exclusive. But if someone does
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: come along and I feel that strongly about it, I
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: will enter into a monogamous relationship. But I also just
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: want to use my body and share it.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, how great is it to be just
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: like living in the moment where you're at being like cool,
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: whatever comes my way that's positive, feels right, let's do that.
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so excuse me.
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: I just took a sip of my bone broth at
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: my friend. Oh and so yesterday I was sick. I
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: was supposed to go to dinner with like six of
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: my girlfriends here, and I arranged it and then canceled.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: I was like, can you guys go without me? I'm
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: just spreading germs basically, right, And then three of them
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: came over with soup, Like three different people dropped off
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: lentil soup, bone broth, and then this sky brought me flowers.
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: I was like, what this is like my little village
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: of happiness? Yes, you have community there, I do, I do.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: I feel so loved I just it feels so nice.
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: I'm soaking it all up.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's wonderful. I think something it's not really a resolution,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: but something I want to be more intentional about this
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: year is interacting in community and sort of like getting
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: off of my screens, which I've pretty successfully done this
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: last year. Like I don't keep Instagram on my phone
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: just because otherwise I just keep going to it, but
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: getting off of screens and getting into real life, so
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: like rather having a zoom, going in person scheduling. You know,
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: I'm going to trivia night tonight with some of my girlfriends,
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: that sort of thing. So trying to be intentional.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's nice. That's nice too. I mean, it's always
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: nice to be off your phone. I don't spend nearly
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: as much time on my phone as I do when
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: I'm home here when I'm here because when you're skiing,
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: you're not sitting there looking at.
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: Your phone, right, And that feels good too. I don't
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: want to be like that.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: It says I got a thing on my phone that
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: says your screen use time has gone down thirty seven percent.
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: Oh that's from last week, and it keeps saying that
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: every week. It keeps going down. I'm like, exactly, that's it.
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: And Bernice and Bernice, Bernice, I'm missing the whole point.
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: Bernice is this We Bernice and I.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: Are bonding like it's nobody's fucking business. Bernice, I res
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: I took up with me to drive because I thought
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: I was going to rescue that other dog. We went
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: to the rescue. The dog bit me, so I was like, Okay, well,
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: obviously I can't.
• 13:51
  Speaker 3: Get this dog.
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: But by the way, what business do I have having
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: more than one dog? Anyway, Bernice is all I can handle,
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: and every she piece twice a day, and that's the
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: schedule I'm on.
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: So she is so cute.
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: She sleeps in bed with me, She follows me around
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: because she doesn't know where the fuck she is she is.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: I mean, I can't wait to see what happens when
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: we bring her back at the end of winter and
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: see how she reacts when she sees Felix, because I mean,
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: she'll probably drop me like a hot potato.
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: But we are bonding.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: She gets into bed with me on her own, she
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: cut and then she comes in when she wants to pee.
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: She taps me on the shoulder and she's like, come on,
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: let's go with.
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: Her, paw. I mean, I'm like, oh my god.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: And the other day I was walking around I posted
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: this on Instagram. I took her for a walk and
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: this little kid was on his balcony and he goes.
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: Daddy, daddy, come outside, there's a little baby bear.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: I mean, everyone stops to talk to her, which is also,
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: you know, very annoying.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: Right right, It's like, oh, this is so fun. And
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: then you're like, too many people.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: I'm not looking for any extra any extra attention or conversation.
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: I'm like, back off, back off.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: She does fully look like a bear, like she looks
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: like she should be hibernating.
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: I know, she's so fucking cute, so sweet.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: Well, should we introduce our guest today?
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, we have a guest today whose book is
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: called Black Friend and she had a very funny show
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: on Showtime called ze Way and that's her name, zee Way.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: So please welcome this hot potato ze Way. Oh okay,
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: your time, take your time?
• 15:25
  Speaker 5: Sorry, why honey, how are.
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: You are you good? Good? Let's get yeah, yeah, sit down,
• 15:31
  Speaker 3: let's go, bitch. Are you fucking ready? I'm ready to go.
• 15:35
  Speaker 5: Let's do it. Look no, I'm good raw dogging it?
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: Oh, I love a raw dog.
• 15:41
  Speaker 5: I look at a little moist. It's okay.
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: This is Catherine, she's on the thing. How are you doing?
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: I'm great? How are you?
• 15:48
  Speaker 5: I'm great? I'm chilling. I'm coming from an interview with
• 15:50
  Speaker 5: Penn Badgley of you Slash Gossip Girlfriends.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 15:54
  Speaker 5: Yes, he has a podcast as well. So I just did.
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: Oh oh good and how was that? It was great?
• 15:58
  Speaker 5: I can't complain.
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: Okay, great, great?
• 16:00
  Speaker 5: Of course. How are you doing today?
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Hi?
• 16:02
  Speaker 5: Many people? Did you interview?
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: R I've interviewed one person so far. Yeah.
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: But I can't stop clearing my throat today. It's almost
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: like I smoked a joint last night. But I didn't,
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: and I don't smoke joints specifically because I hate fucking going.
• 16:13
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it's not cute.
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: So I don't know what happened, and I'm irritated. You know.
• 16:17
  Speaker 5: I'm sorry. I would offer you a lossage, but I
• 16:19
  Speaker 5: don't have.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: You don't know, well, of course you don't have a
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: lossage on you. Why would you?
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: You know?
• 16:23
  Speaker 5: Sometimes I travel with cough drops, but not today.
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: We have a lot in common, we do, We have
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: a lot.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: We're both blonde, yeah, we're both white, blonde, big breasted women.
• 16:33
  Speaker 5: Oh yes, BBW is what they call me.
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: So that's what I've been calling you behind your back. Actually,
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: thank you. So I first heard.
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: About you when you had your show on Showtime called
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: ze Way, and they were trying to book me on
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: the show, and my publicist at the time was so
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: confused about the format of the show that she goes,
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: I just don't feel comfortable sending you here because it
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: seems like a setup show. And I said, I can
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: handle a fucking setup show, Like I'm not worried about
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: someone setting me up and catching me out, Like what
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: I mean.
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: It's already out out there. Wow, and so and then
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: I never did it.
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: But then I was watching your show and I had
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: forgotten that I was, and then I was like, oh,
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: I wanted to do you.
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: I would have totally loved it, really great.
• 17:13
  Speaker 5: And by the way, I used to watch you every
• 17:14
  Speaker 5: day after school on Chelsea lately. I love that show.
• 17:19
  Speaker 5: So it would have been such a fun meeting of
• 17:21
  Speaker 5: the minds. But you know what next, I have to.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: Do it next exactly. And how was that show for you?
• 17:26
  Speaker 5: It was? It was wild? I know, yeah, it was wild.
• 17:28
  Speaker 5: I mean, what was the nicest part of that show
• 17:30
  Speaker 5: was that the guests were so uniquely different, like Andrew
• 17:34
  Speaker 5: Yang versus like Chet Hanks versus friendly boys, Like they're
• 17:37
  Speaker 5: all so desparate. So I felt like I was learning
• 17:40
  Speaker 5: a lot about American culture.
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: Oh right, you needed an update on America. Yeah, just
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: like a heat check, like okay, what's popping?
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: Okay?
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: And so I read that you studied Oprah's interviews to
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: see who you wanted on your show, or did you
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: study her interviews to see how to interview people?
• 17:58
  Speaker 5: I mean, I definitely think Oprah was really good at
• 18:01
  Speaker 5: capturing like sensational interviews, Like they were always so ecstatical.
• 18:06
  Speaker 5: Even the Tom Cruise is like such a lightning in
• 18:08
  Speaker 5: the bottle that interview, And so she really taught me
• 18:11
  Speaker 5: the value of like creating a moment with the guest. Yeah,
• 18:15
  Speaker 5: so that's something that I really Also, she would interview
• 18:18
  Speaker 5: a wide plethora of people, So she talked to like
• 18:20
  Speaker 5: Tom Cruise or a different celebrity, Tony Braxen, and then
• 18:23
  Speaker 5: she'd talk to like, oh, the mother of a serial killer,
• 18:27
  Speaker 5: and it'd be like all in the same episode. So
• 18:29
  Speaker 5: she had really wide range. But she's a journalism background,
• 18:31
  Speaker 5: so I think that was really important.
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and she also is a great fucking listener. Yeah
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: that's so good.
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: Okay. Yeah, when she's interested, you're interested.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: And that's actually the key ingredient I believe for anyone
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: to do a decent interview is to actually fucking listen
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: and stop thinking about what you're going to be saying.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: And it sometimes takes a long time to relax enough
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: into that. Like I was talking to a friend of
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: mine who has a TV show or has had several
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: TV shows, and he's a talk show host and I've
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: been a talk show host, and we were at drinks
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: last night and he was saying, it's funny when you
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: you haven't done it for a little bit and then
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: you do it, there's a rustiness that comes with it
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: because like, you can do it for many years and
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: you think it's like in your pocket, but then you
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: actually need to warm it up again because like talking
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: and interviewing people. I feel like I interview people wherever
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: I go. If you got dinner, I interview them. I
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: can't stop with the questions, and then I will badger
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: them if they don't, you know, if they're shy or
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: they're resistant.
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: I go in harder, oh really, more curious about what
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: they're what's up? You know, what their story?
• 19:29
  Speaker 5: What are you hiding?
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: Because there's a natural curiosity, right, that you have with people?
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: I mean I might have an unnatural curiosity because I
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: like to get involved in people's business.
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: Do you feel that way?
• 19:39
  Speaker 5: I gues and no, Like I like to mind my business.
• 19:42
  Speaker 5: I like to let people tell me things on their own.
• 19:45
  Speaker 5: And that's part of why people feel comfortable. Maybe is
• 19:47
  Speaker 5: because I will sit quietly and that is enough to
• 19:50
  Speaker 5: make people feel uncomfortable enough to speak.
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: I see. So a very different approach.
• 19:55
  Speaker 5: Different approach. Yeah, I won't like corner someone and be like,
• 19:57
  Speaker 5: tell me your life secrets, but maybe I should on
• 20:00
  Speaker 5: like I'm really I want to see what that tactic
• 20:02
  Speaker 5: does well.
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: There's also like an anthropological element to interviewing, right. It's
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: also just like you're trying to understand everybody, where everybody's
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: coming from. And I always give I noticed when I'm
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: talking to people and I'm curious about them, Like I
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: always think there's some big mystery behind everybody, and sometimes
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: more oftentimes there isn't you know what I mean?
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: People are pretty fucking basic.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: So sometimes you're like creating this story in your head
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: where you think somebody's gonna like reveal some thing or
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: you're wondering a lot about it, and it's really not
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: that complicated.
• 20:31
  Speaker 5: I feel like for me, it's about connection, Like what
• 20:33
  Speaker 5: do we have in common? Like as disparate as we seem, like,
• 20:37
  Speaker 5: what is the thing that we can come together on?
• 20:39
  Speaker 5: And that is how I find gold?
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: And what's your background? So where did you grow up?
• 20:44
  Speaker 5: Massachusetts?
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: Okay?
• 20:45
  Speaker 5: Where are you from?
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: I'm from Jersey, Jersey's right, yeah? And you live in
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: la or New York, New York. Oh yeah, you know
• 20:51
  Speaker 3: you texted me about your chouse. Yah, yes, you get
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: your chouse.
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: Yes?
• 20:54
  Speaker 5: And he is so sweet, so cute. I dropped him
• 20:56
  Speaker 5: off at daycare today.
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: What color is he? Black? Oh?
• 20:59
  Speaker 5: I want a black He is so sweet. Oh, they're
• 21:02
  Speaker 5: so they're quiet and clean.
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: I know, you know what.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: They don't bark and they don't fucking want anything. No,
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: don't you just love their faces in the way that.
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: They like it's really good? Yeah?
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: And then the lips that come down like I can't
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: control myself and I have a little one at home.
• 21:17
  Speaker 5: Oh, chow as well?
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I only have chiws. Let me show you Bernice. Sorry,
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: I know that the listeners can't hear this, but it's.
• 21:24
  Speaker 5: Well they can see it on your social Can I
• 21:26
  Speaker 5: tell a story about chow chows as you search?
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but that's Bernice.
• 21:30
  Speaker 5: Oh my god god. Okay, so she's groomed, she's kinda cut,
• 21:32
  Speaker 5: short cut. Yeah, she's so sweet, hot is she?
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: She's like eleven or twelve. Her brother died last year.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: And I like older dogs because I'm good at transitioning
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: them from that age to death, you know, like that's
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: my sweet spot. Like I want them to feel loved
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: and attention. And I also they're gonna No one's gonna
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: get a five year old dog. And usually when dogs
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: are around me for a few years, they tend to
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: pass away.
• 21:53
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: Wow, my housekeeper like she has Bernice when I'm on
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: the road. So she is like only Spanish speaking now nice.
• 22:00
  Speaker 5: Oh that's so funny.
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: Spanish a little bit now to communicate with her.
• 22:05
  Speaker 5: I love that.
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: Okay, tell us your child story.
• 22:08
  Speaker 5: Oh well, my child story. This is not my personal chold,
• 22:10
  Speaker 5: but so the chow chow basically like in ancient China,
• 22:14
  Speaker 5: the emperor was like Okay, what dog can kill a bear?
• 22:17
  Speaker 5: And they brought them thirteen different dogs and he's like, okay,
• 22:19
  Speaker 5: this dog, chow Chow is the cutest, and so that
• 22:21
  Speaker 5: he made that the official child chow dog and he
• 22:24
  Speaker 5: had like three thousand and they would like hunt and
• 22:27
  Speaker 5: kill people and like be warriors.
• 22:28
  Speaker 3: The Chowchow, the chow chow.
• 22:30
  Speaker 5: Google that. Oh my fun fact, the real beautiful dogs
• 22:33
  Speaker 5: and their killers.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: I I was going to rescue this other big fat
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: nugget that I found. Oh he was a big fat
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: chunky but he nipped at me twice. And the guy
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: said he's gonna nip at everyone he goes, that's his personality.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: I'm like, well, that's not gonna work. I have too
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: many people coming through my house. I can't have him
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: biting everybody, because you know, somebody, I don't care if
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: a dog nips at me or bites me. Really, I
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: really don't unless it's like, you know, a lunatic and
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: it's like carving up my body. But I don't mind
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: a little bite. But most people get freaked out by that.
• 22:59
  Speaker 5: You know, I've I've never been bitten by a dog.
• 23:01
  Speaker 5: I'm gonna be honest, how did you get into chow
• 23:03
  Speaker 5: chouse beautiful like research and realizing that they were the
• 23:07
  Speaker 5: dog of Chinese emperors. I identify as an empress, so
• 23:11
  Speaker 5: so I decided that this was a dog for me.
• 23:13
  Speaker 5: I also honestly love the temperament of like quiet and clean,
• 23:16
  Speaker 5: like barking gives me an ageda and so it was
• 23:20
  Speaker 5: really something that I needed from my my roommate.
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: Well, fucking barking is so fucking annoying. People have dogs
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: at bark. I want those dogs to shut the fuck up,
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: and I want other things to happen to those dogs.
• 23:32
  Speaker 6: Do that.
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: I won't say no, no, I won't say it on
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: air because it's it's obviously not nice, but and I
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: don't mean it, but I just barking is so annoying
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: and it's just such a bad quality.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 23:44
  Speaker 5: I spend a lot of time with my dog, like
• 23:46
  Speaker 5: like I spent because I'm I write all the time,
• 23:48
  Speaker 5: so my dog and me writing, and so if my
• 23:50
  Speaker 5: dog was barking, I don't think I could get any
• 23:53
  Speaker 5: writing done. But dogs at bark. Hey, God bless you.
• 23:56
  Speaker 5: We love Peta.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: I mean, Peta doesn't love me, Peter, will you fucking
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: And they asked the minute you do something wrong, they
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: will come back there. They act like they're your best friends.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: When you rescue your dog and then they're like, ah,
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: we saw you on your playing with your dog to
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: whatever is that appropriate to fly a dog fourteen hours?
• 24:12
  Speaker 3: I'm like, back the fuck up.
• 24:13
  Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, I'm.
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: Like, listen, my dog and I are traveling together. Back
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: it up. So you grew up in Massachusetts, yes, and
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: then how many brothers and sisters do you do?
• 24:22
  Speaker 5: Siblings when older one younger they're both boys, okay, a girl,
• 24:25
  Speaker 5: a middle child.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: Okay, so you're a middle child. That doesn't really track.
• 24:29
  Speaker 5: What do you mean because usually.
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: It's the youngest of siblings that are in this business really,
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: especially in the role that you play, Because like, for
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: people who haven't seen your show on Showtime, I want
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: you to describe what the premise is.
• 24:41
  Speaker 5: The premise of my show is that I interview guests
• 24:44
  Speaker 5: and I bait them into saying uncomfortable things. And it's
• 24:47
  Speaker 5: pulled from this like this hardened trope that we see
• 24:50
  Speaker 5: in like Fox News where they would talk to like
• 24:53
  Speaker 5: Barack Obama and accuse him of wearing a tan suit
• 24:57
  Speaker 5: and how that was to the destruction of democracy and
• 24:59
  Speaker 5: similar I kind of take my guests at their worst
• 25:03
  Speaker 5: word possible and exploit that for comedic.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: Relief, and then how does that work out for the
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: guest comedically?
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: Does it?
• 25:10
  Speaker 5: It's I mean, yes, it's chaotic, it's funny, but every
• 25:12
  Speaker 5: guest is like a consenting adult. They know what's they know,
• 25:15
  Speaker 5: they're briefed entirely on what's going to happen. And the
• 25:19
  Speaker 5: people who do the best on the shows are the
• 25:20
  Speaker 5: ones who sort of surrender to that chaos and like
• 25:23
  Speaker 5: like double down on it.
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I like that format. It's very new. Thank you
• 25:27
  Speaker 3: and original.
• 25:28
  Speaker 5: Thank you. Yeah, I mean, I you know, I never
• 25:30
  Speaker 5: thought I would say Tucker Callson inspired me, but here
• 25:33
  Speaker 5: I am.
• 25:33
  Speaker 3: I know he is such an inspiration. Let's talk about
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: your book a little. You wrote essays. Yes, I read
• 25:40
  Speaker 3: that you didn't want them to be too personal.
• 25:42
  Speaker 5: I mean, who wants to share anything?
• 25:44
  Speaker 3: Well?
• 25:44
  Speaker 5: You actually have? You?
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: You?
• 25:47
  Speaker 5: I mean you've wrote written five or six Yeah, you've
• 25:50
  Speaker 5: written a lot of books. I don't even know if
• 25:52
  Speaker 5: I have that many stories.
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: You do.
• 25:54
  Speaker 5: I do, but I don't think i'd ever share them.
• 25:56
  Speaker 5: But I respect that. I respect that honestly, it's really
• 25:59
  Speaker 5: chic culturally Nigerians. It's like, why share any of your
• 26:02
  Speaker 5: business when you could simply not. So that is where
• 26:06
  Speaker 5: I'm coming from. But my book was due. I did
• 26:09
  Speaker 5: sell it, and so I had to finish it, and
• 26:12
  Speaker 5: I didn't want to give back the advance because there
• 26:14
  Speaker 5: was a strike going on with the writers and the actors.
• 26:17
  Speaker 3: Did you think about giving back the advanced hundred times?
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: You didn't want to write it?
• 26:20
  Speaker 5: No, I wrote it. I wrote it very quickly, and
• 26:23
  Speaker 5: I didn't want to release it into the world. Oh yeah,
• 26:26
  Speaker 5: I wrote it. I mean I'm a writer like that
• 26:28
  Speaker 5: is the easy part. It's the idea that people are
• 26:30
  Speaker 5: going to perceive me.
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: That is very Nigerian.
• 26:33
  Speaker 5: Yes, shout out Nigel.
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: So you were resistant to releasing it because you were
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: exposing a part of your life that you wanted to
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: keep private.
• 26:41
  Speaker 5: I was exposing any part of my life. Yeah. I mean,
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: I'm lucky enough that when I interview I get to
• 26:46
  Speaker 5: hide behind the artifice of a character. Right, so's she's
• 26:49
  Speaker 5: being devilish, not me. I'm the good guy. I'm the friend.
• 26:52
  Speaker 5: I'm the kind hearted woman. And so when you have
• 26:54
  Speaker 5: a book, you can't hide behind two hundred plus pages,
• 26:57
  Speaker 5: you have to say something of value, and so finding
• 27:01
  Speaker 5: out what I said that was of note and what
• 27:03
  Speaker 5: to share about myself that is worth my reader's time
• 27:06
  Speaker 5: is something that I really toiled with.
• 27:09
  Speaker 3: M Yeah, and then how did you feel about that?
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: Once the book was out and you got the reception
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: that you did, how did you feel did you your
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: feelings change at all?
• 27:15
  Speaker 5: Of course? I mean I was called a genius, so
• 27:17
  Speaker 5: it's like, yeah, I'm just dabbing, dabbing through New York City.
• 27:21
  Speaker 5: I mean it's a sense of relief right that anyone
• 27:24
  Speaker 5: can could connect to any one of my stories, because
• 27:26
  Speaker 5: that was my fear that I was like writing into
• 27:29
  Speaker 5: a vacuum. So I'm really appreciative for sure.
• 27:32
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: I read one of them that we talked about your
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: walk You're walking in the woods, and we mended and
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: this guy, this white guy, pulled over.
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and well you tell the story.
• 27:41
  Speaker 5: I mean, the story is so deeply creepy. So I went,
• 27:44
  Speaker 5: I go, I have to write in silence, and that's
• 27:47
  Speaker 5: why I have a very quiet dog. And so I
• 27:49
  Speaker 5: also liked to go to the woods of upstate New
• 27:52
  Speaker 5: York to write, and so I would hike up this
• 27:55
  Speaker 5: trailer at this place airbnbid, and every day we'd hike
• 27:58
  Speaker 5: with friends and the only time we ever encountered people
• 28:01
  Speaker 5: were like desperate census workers being like, please please fill
• 28:04
  Speaker 5: out the senses. We need to know who's living here,
• 28:06
  Speaker 5: and we tell them, sorry, Airbnb destabilizing. And so one
• 28:10
  Speaker 5: day this I'm walking the trail by myself. My friend
• 28:12
  Speaker 5: had just left and my other friend was coming in
• 28:14
  Speaker 5: the next day, and this super ru pulls up beside
• 28:17
  Speaker 5: me and I think, oh, hey, it's not I'm not
• 28:19
  Speaker 5: on the census. It's okay. And he's like, what are
• 28:22
  Speaker 5: you doing here? And I'm confused, like walking, and he's like,
• 28:26
  Speaker 5: you know you're not supposed to be here. I own
• 28:29
  Speaker 5: this property. You're trespassing. I'm like, oh, you own this property. Well,
• 28:33
  Speaker 5: thank you for having me at your beautiful airbnb. It's
• 28:36
  Speaker 5: so nice. I love the pool. Oh so you're staying
• 28:38
  Speaker 5: at the airbnb. So I realized he was lying, and
• 28:41
  Speaker 5: suddenly my heart skipped a be because now I'm alone
• 28:44
  Speaker 5: in the woods with a man who is a liar.
• 28:47
  Speaker 5: And so I'm thinking, like Jason bournstyle, I'm thinking like, oh,
• 28:49
  Speaker 5: should I calculate, like how fast can I run what
• 28:52
  Speaker 5: should I do? And he keeps asking me, what's your name?
• 28:55
  Speaker 5: What's your name? What's your name? And this was like
• 28:56
  Speaker 5: right at the time when I was starting to like
• 28:58
  Speaker 5: become more prominent, and so I'm like afraid to say
• 29:00
  Speaker 5: my name, Like what does he have? This is like
• 29:03
  Speaker 5: during the like twenty twenty summer where everything was so
• 29:05
  Speaker 5: politically fraught. And I noticed that there's a blonde woman
• 29:08
  Speaker 5: next to him and she's saying like, it's okay, it's okay,
• 29:11
  Speaker 5: justin It's okay, and I'm like, I'm just walking and
• 29:15
  Speaker 5: you have to understand, like it's really weird for me
• 29:17
  Speaker 5: to like tell you my name in the woods, like
• 29:19
  Speaker 5: I'm alone, I'm in a like a purple fur hat,
• 29:22
  Speaker 5: Like this is strange, and she keeps insisting that it's okay,
• 29:25
  Speaker 5: and he's like, don't worry, I understand. Like the political crimate.
• 29:28
  Speaker 5: We have a black friend in the back, but in
• 29:30
  Speaker 5: the super room dead as dead as it's so creepy,
• 29:33
  Speaker 5: dead ass. But the windows are up, so all I
• 29:36
  Speaker 5: see is my reflection and I'm thinking, oh my god,
• 29:40
  Speaker 5: when do I run, Like the tinted windows are who
• 29:42
  Speaker 5: else is in the back of this car? Like, am
• 29:44
  Speaker 5: I going to be murdered for this Jordan Peel fantasy?
• 29:48
  Speaker 5: And I say I would say hi to the black
• 29:52
  Speaker 5: friend in the back, but I can't see them. And
• 29:55
  Speaker 5: then the two the couple starts arguing and I'm like
• 29:59
  Speaker 5: this should be chance, like I should run right now.
• 30:01
  Speaker 5: And then they slowly roll down the back window and
• 30:04
  Speaker 5: it's this emaciated little black girl and she's sitting forward
• 30:10
  Speaker 5: like this and it's so still, and I say hi.
• 30:15
  Speaker 5: They're like hi. I'm like I love to go swimming
• 30:18
  Speaker 5: at that pool. They're like, oh, she loves to go
• 30:19
  Speaker 5: swimming at that pool that you're staying at. I'm like, yeah,
• 30:22
  Speaker 5: I would go swimming more, but it's cold, and they
• 30:25
  Speaker 5: were like, yeah, it is cold. And that was the
• 30:27
  Speaker 5: first moment when they realized like, oh, we have a
• 30:29
  Speaker 5: shared humanity, like we can agree that it is cold
• 30:34
  Speaker 5: too cold to swim. And then the little girl who's
• 30:36
  Speaker 5: facing forward just turns and screams lucky. And I jump,
• 30:41
  Speaker 5: like I was not expecting such like a low tambra
• 30:44
  Speaker 5: to come out of like this like nine year old
• 30:46
  Speaker 5: tiny girl. And I go, yeah, I guess I am lucky.
• 30:50
  Speaker 5: I guess I am lucky, and then this guy justin goes, hey,
• 30:54
  Speaker 5: just so you know, the set of the woods you're
• 30:55
  Speaker 5: staying on is on this side. The side you're on
• 30:57
  Speaker 5: is belongs to Elliot Spitzer. I'm like, Ellie Spitzer, I
• 31:00
  Speaker 5: don't even what the like, I know that name, but
• 31:02
  Speaker 5: I don't remember. Sorry. I'm like, okay, thanks. They're like
• 31:04
  Speaker 5: just so you know, okay, thanks, okay, bye, thanks, and
• 31:07
  Speaker 5: they drive up the hill and the little girl does
• 31:08
  Speaker 5: not break eye contact with me until they're over there.
• 31:11
  Speaker 5: I run back to the Airbnb at Google Elliot Spitzer.
• 31:13
  Speaker 5: I'm like, oh, like if I was caught in the
• 31:15
  Speaker 5: woods with him, I would be I would be worried.
• 31:19
  Speaker 5: And then you know, you Airbnb, you have to clean
• 31:22
  Speaker 5: the place whatever. It's super expensive four hundred all your
• 31:23
  Speaker 5: cleaning that you're still cleaning it whatever, And so I
• 31:26
  Speaker 5: like comment on the Airbnb like, oh, had a lovely time.
• 31:29
  Speaker 5: It's such a beautiful place. Just so you guys know,
• 31:32
  Speaker 5: like I did have this get out experience. I do
• 31:34
  Speaker 5: not judge the host, however, don't hike alone. And then
• 31:39
  Speaker 5: the host texts me and he says, it's so weird
• 31:43
  Speaker 5: that you said you had that experience, Like, who is
• 31:46
  Speaker 5: that guy he said, And I'm like, oh, he said
• 31:47
  Speaker 5: he was your neighbor. He's like, oh, that's not my neighbor.
• 31:51
  Speaker 5: And that was the end of that story.
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: Ah. So you think that little girl was there to
• 31:56
  Speaker 3: adopt a daughter. It seems like how old was she?
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: She was nine?
• 32:01
  Speaker 5: She was like a young kid, she was nine or
• 32:04
  Speaker 5: maybe seven, but tall. But but but he wasn't a neighbor.
• 32:08
  Speaker 5: He was just a stranger.
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I love it.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: I love that people just want to get involved in
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: fucking shit that has nothing to do with them. I mean,
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: who would care about anyone walking down the fucking street
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: and why.
• 32:20
  Speaker 3: Would you ever get involved in them?
• 32:21
  Speaker 5: Like imagine, like what do you do? It was one
• 32:24
  Speaker 5: hundred acres and there is nothing I was disturbing other
• 32:27
  Speaker 5: than like leaves, dried leaves, and so that he elected
• 32:31
  Speaker 5: himself as.
• 32:32
  Speaker 3: Mayor of the woods. Unwell, I know, and I do
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: you know.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: I hate when I hear that there's a woman with
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: them that just sits there and like, lets that go on, Yeah,
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: why do you why are you letting your husband act
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: like such a fucking asshole.
• 32:44
  Speaker 5: I know she knew enough that she knew what he
• 32:46
  Speaker 5: was doing was bad or not enough to stop him.
• 32:48
  Speaker 3: They say something.
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, well we're gonna take a quick break
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: and we're going to come back and give advice.
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: Okay, are you ready for that?
• 32:53
  Speaker 5: Yes? Please?
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: Okay, we're back. We're back. What do we have in
• 33:02
  Speaker 3: store for z Way today, Catherine.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: We've got a lot of stuff. We've got a question
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: about porn, We've got a dating art question.
• 33:10
  Speaker 3: Okay, great, let's start with porn. Okay, do you watch
• 33:13
  Speaker 3: a lot of porn?
• 33:14
  Speaker 5: No?
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: No, This comes from Tina. Tina says, dear Chelsea. I'm
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: in my mid forties and my husband is a few
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: years older, closer to fifty. We've been married since we
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: were in our early twenties and have two daughters who
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: are now in their early twenties. I'm finding the aging
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: process to be brutal. I want you, yeah, I want
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: to embrace it and still feel beautiful and desirable, but
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: I generally don't. I look in the mirror and I
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: see someone with what feels like rapidly sagging skin, wrinkles,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: and gray hair, and it's all such a bummer. I
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: find it completely unfair that men are not held to
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: the same standard as women. I recently started therapy for
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: the first time. But there's one topic I don't want
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: to bring up with my therapist, and that is porn.
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: When we were younger, my husband and I watched porn
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: together occasionally, and it was fun. As we got older
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: and had kids in the house, that's kind of faded away,
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: but we've still had a very active sex life over
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: the years. I've known that he still watches porn, and
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: now that it's so easily accessible on our phones, I'm
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: pretty sure he watches it very frequently. I know this
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: shouldn't bother me, but as I'm getting older and so
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: are our kids, I'm becoming increasingly uncomfortable because the females
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: in the porn are now the same age as our children,
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: and it feels a little creepy to me.
• 34:24
  Speaker 5: Now.
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: Of course, they don't make much porn with women our age,
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: and if they do, I'm sure that porn with women
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: in their early twenties would be more appealing to him
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: than most men anyway. So my question is, do you
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: think there comes a point when aging men watching porn
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: with much younger women gets inappropriate? Do I just have
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: to accept this fact even though we're both very much
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: aging and he's always going to be attracted to young
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: women and accept that as normal and not creepy. Anyway,
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: love your show, look forward to hearing your opinions.
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: Tina, Wow, well Tina right, Tina, Yeah wow, well z
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: e Way, what do you think?
• 34:59
  Speaker 5: That question makes me sad? So the reason why I
• 35:02
  Speaker 5: don't watch a lot of porn is because I get
• 35:04
  Speaker 5: learn TV right, so I get caught up in the
• 35:07
  Speaker 5: ethics of it. I'm like, is it a safe set?
• 35:10
  Speaker 5: I start to unravel the actual production of it, and
• 35:14
  Speaker 5: so that I can't I can't get off if I
• 35:16
  Speaker 5: know my girlies aren't getting put on and so so.
• 35:21
  Speaker 5: For So, if the question is isn't it inappropriate for
• 35:24
  Speaker 5: her man to watch porn with young women, I'm going
• 35:27
  Speaker 5: to say yes, but not because of what you think.
• 35:30
  Speaker 5: It's because of the ethics of how they shoot it.
• 35:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so you're getting into a different area.
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I would say with regard to her husband, it
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: is creepy when your husband when when the porn actors, like,
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: I think that's a very valid point to bring up
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: to your husband. Yeah, like you're gonna want you want
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: to watch porn? Fine, your you know that's what you're into.
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: That's fine, but there is an issue like if the
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: porn actors are their daughter's age, like that is disgusting.
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: There is something very creepy about that, and that's reasonable
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: too conveyed to the husband like it is I think.
• 36:02
  Speaker 5: So, I don't know, can you police people's desire or I.
• 36:06
  Speaker 3: Mean, if they respect you and say and you say, hey,
• 36:08
  Speaker 3: this really bothers me, Like I don't.
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: I mean, I understand you like porn, but these girls
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: are so young, and like I'm aging, I don't feel great.
• 36:15
  Speaker 3: I feel like you'd rather.
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: You're more attracted to that, which is nothing I can change,
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: but I'd rather you wouldn't.
• 36:21
  Speaker 3: You know there's a couple of.
• 36:22
  Speaker 5: Reasons watch milk porn instead.
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah there's I'm sure there is milk. Yeah, I'm sure
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: there is. I think I've seen that. But I think
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: you totally have to say something just because it's like
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: self preservation. You have a good sex life, you it
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: seem like you have a good relationship, you've been together
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: for many years. Fucking just say this doesn't make me
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: feel good. I mean, he's gonna watch it anyway, and
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: he's just going to hide it more.
• 36:41
  Speaker 5: But so is that a resolution? If he hides. So
• 36:43
  Speaker 5: that's not a resolution.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: No, it's not a resolution. Well it could be because
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: I mean, let's say maybe.
• 36:47
  Speaker 5: He he doesn't ignorance his bliss.
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: Well no, no, no, no, I'm saying maybe he will
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: listen to her and take that into consideration and go, okay,
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: be sensitive about watching it or maybe watch less of it,
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: or at least she's even if he ignores it and
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: just sneaks it more and make sure it's more discreet
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: about it he is, at least she's getting it off
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: of her chest and saying it. Like, I think bottling
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: that stuff up is like that adds to you know,
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: you're feeling bad about aging.
• 37:13
  Speaker 5: I agree.
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: And secondly, I just want to make a comment about aging,
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: Like obviously you know I have access to all sorts
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: of things that help me anti age, but there is
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: something very like when you look in the mirror and
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: you say, I don't I don't like looking at the
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: saggy skin and everything, like those things have an impact
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: on your well being, Like you know you have had
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: a long like it sounds like a healthy life, a
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: healthy marriage, healthy kids, Like there's a lot to be
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: proud of and there's yeah, there is a lot of
• 37:37
  Speaker 2: elegance that comes with naturally aging. Like I look at
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: people that naturally age a lot and think I wish
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: I were more you know, natural about it.
• 37:44
  Speaker 5: I believe in natural aging, but I think everyone is
• 37:48
  Speaker 5: entitled to do what they want with your body.
• 37:50
  Speaker 3: Who cares?
• 37:50
  Speaker 5: Who am I to judge? But to your point, there's
• 37:53
  Speaker 5: so much to be Like the wrinkles that you have
• 37:55
  Speaker 5: are a reflection of a life long lived, and like
• 37:58
  Speaker 5: they are a reflection of like a beautiful family. As
• 38:01
  Speaker 5: you just said, you have a beautiful husband, and you
• 38:02
  Speaker 5: have such a great like conversation and community, and that
• 38:06
  Speaker 5: is something to be proud of. Like, who do I
• 38:08
  Speaker 5: want to age and die? No, but it means that
• 38:10
  Speaker 5: I'm lucky enough. I'd rather be old and die than
• 38:13
  Speaker 5: die young. So I think that it's a privilege. Yeah,
• 38:16
  Speaker 5: but it's hard for me to say that because I'm
• 38:18
  Speaker 5: like nineteen.
• 38:19
  Speaker 3: Well it's ours.
• 38:21
  Speaker 5: You're not nineteen goo googga nineteen Chelsea, No, you're not.
• 38:26
  Speaker 3: Yes, I am, you're nineteen years.
• 38:27
  Speaker 5: I was born in two thousand and three.
• 38:30
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, I didn't know you were ninety woah, wow, Wow.
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: You have a lot of stuff happening at nineteen. You
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: haven't seen anything yet.
• 38:42
  Speaker 5: No, not even the bottom of a beer.
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: Really, you never had a drink. No, Nigerians don't like that.
• 38:47
  Speaker 3: They don't like to drink.
• 38:49
  Speaker 5: Who have you dated in Nigerian?
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: You don't want manager in my best friend's marriage, I
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: mean my old best friend.
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: Oh no, we're not No, we're still friends.
• 38:55
  Speaker 2: Okay was her husband and they are just like yeah,
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: no drinking, very very bright. They're all doctors and lawyers
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: because there are no other choices. You have to be
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: a doctor or lawyer and successful when you're a Nigerian.
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: There's no room for any failure.
• 39:11
  Speaker 5: It's like Tuck Across and Peers Morgan doctor lawyer. It's
• 39:14
  Speaker 5: like that same scenario exactly.
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: Okay, Katherine, what's next? We just told that woman to
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: oh oh, let me wrap that up. I just want
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: to say, like, yeah, you need to start talking in
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: a nicer way to yourself, you know. And as long
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: as you're living a healthy lifestyle, like whatever is you're
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: going to do to make yourself feel better about the
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: way you look, drink more water, exercise more, eat healthier
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: food that shows up in your skin, in your face
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: every single day, and when you're feeding yourself and you're
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: feeling healthy, you do look better and you do feel better.
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: So it's all this kind of like psychological structure that
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: you need to get on board with as we age,
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: because there's going to be plenty of things that you
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: don't like about yourself. No one it gets to escape
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: from that physically. Okay, Catherine, we solve that problem, I think.
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: I think. So, I'm trying to switch my bracelets over.
• 39:54
  Speaker 2: To my other wrist, and it's really not working because
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: I have to do I have to go to this
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: about Yeah, yeah, knew you'd understand.
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: See way, I can't believe you're nineteen years old, googaga.
• 40:03
  Speaker 3: Can you help me with that? Yeah, since you're nineteen,
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: you probably have great eyes.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: I do you have great great vision and dexterity. Well,
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: our next question comes from one of the most thorough
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: callers I think we've ever had.
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: Oh oh wow, we've had some really fucking thorough callers.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: She starts with her stats, age twenty nine, gender, female, ethnicity, black, location, NYC,
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: sexual orientation, straight, topic, dating, and specifically what to do
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: when you lose hope?
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: Okay, straight, but not for long.
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: Here's my situation. I'm a twenty nine year old female
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: living in New York. I've been single and actively dating
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: for the last two and a half years. I have
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: been on a lot of dates sixty five first dates
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: to be exact, since May twenty twenty one. Wow, she
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: was keeping us breadsheet, by the way. Some of these
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: dates have turned into second and third dates, and there
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: was one guy I dated for a few months, but
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: nothing has turned into a committed relationship. In my most
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: recent experience, I went on what I thought were three
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: great dates. After expressing a lot of interest, this guy disappeared.
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: I understand that no one owes you anything early in dating,
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: but one we were intimate, and two this man was
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: thirty five years old, so you'd think he'd at least
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: send a text. Typically I would dust off the rejection
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: and just keep moving. I've been ghosted before, but for
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: some reason, this one got to me. The accumulation of
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: trying and trying with no success has had a bigger
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: emotional impact than I thought. Outside of dating, life is great.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: I've been working with a therapist for the past five years.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: But there's this other thing. I recently saw a psychic
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: for a tarot reading. A few weeks ago, and she
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: told me that someone who's jealous put a curse on me,
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: and that's why dating has been such a struggle. I
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: enjoyed the psychic and other energetic readings, but I also
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: know it's not all fact. Although maybe she's onto something.
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: A curse would explain a lot.
• 41:41
  Speaker 3: Lol.
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: I'm taking a break from the apps for now. My
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: question is how do I keep going?
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: Polly? Hi?
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: Hi?
• 41:49
  Speaker 6: How are you Hi?
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: We have our special guest seaway here today to help.
• 41:53
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, my g favorite people.
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: Hi.
• 41:56
  Speaker 5: This is your story?
• 41:58
  Speaker 1: Yes, Kylie Wow?
• 42:00
  Speaker 3: Okay. So I had a similar experience. I had a
• 42:04
  Speaker 3: dry spell for.
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: A long period of time where I was not connecting
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: with guys or the guys that were interested in me.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: I was not interested in and the guys I was
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: interested in would seem interested and then either like back
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: off or get scared. And I thought, I seriously was like,
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: I feel like I'm cursed. I said that to my
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: girlfriend's in London, because I would like hang out with
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: these guys for like two and a half hours at
• 42:23
  Speaker 2: a bar and then I'd be like, all right, you
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: want to come home with me? And then like they
• 42:27
  Speaker 2: would disappear or they were scared, and I'm like, what
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: the fuck is happening? First of all, I'm ready to rumble.
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: You're never gonna have hear from me again. I mean,
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: this is my experience. I'm not speaking for you.
• 42:39
  Speaker 3: Anyway.
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: I went through this whole thing, and then I was
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: talking to my new therapist.
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: I have a new therapist, and she was.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: Saying something to me. I said, I don't know what
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: kind of energy I'm putting out there. I think I'm
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: putting off the wrong energy or some weird energy. And
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: she said, I just really want you to think of,
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: like what the essence of you is really?
• 42:57
  Speaker 3: Who is like the.
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: Best version of yourself? And and I was like, She's like,
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: can you see that person? And I was like, yeah, absolutely,
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: I know exactly who that person is. And she's like, Okay,
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: when you are on these dates or you were having
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: these interactions, She's like, I just want you to always
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: remember like the best version of yourself, like the essence
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: of who you are. And I think if you're getting
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: tarot cards readings or any sort of psychic readings, you
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: probably understand what I mean by essence, right, Yeah, And
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: it's important.
• 43:24
  Speaker 3: To think of that because we all have like what
• 43:26
  Speaker 3: is our essence? Who are we?
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: And she just said, I just want you to hold
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: onto that version of you instead of getting into like
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: you know, because sometimes we have all these like guardrails
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: up and these invisible defense mechanisms. We're trying to self preserve,
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: We're trying to protect ourselves in different exchanges, and usually
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: it really has nothing to fucking do with you, because
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: all these men are fucking batshit. I had a guy
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: reach out to me a few weeks ago, chasing me
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: down on DM because we had matched on Rayah, and
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: I didn't respond chasing me down on DM to go
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: to a drink with him. I finally make a plan
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: with him and he ended up blowing me off. I'm like,
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: excuse me, you fucking more on But again, that has
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: nothing to do with me, you know what I mean.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: That is something to do with him. That's somebody that
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: I'm glad I never went on a date with, because
• 44:07
  Speaker 2: if that's how we handled the situation, you know, good riddance.
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: But a take some of the pressure off of yourself
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: by understanding that men are it's a hot mess out
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: there and it's a numbers game and I understand you
• 44:17
  Speaker 2: went on sixty five dates, which is a lot, but
• 44:20
  Speaker 2: that attitude is right, Like it's fun to go out
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: and experiment, and just keep in mind the best version
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: of yourself, like when you were a little girl, Like
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: the most innocent, joyful kind of version of yourself. Not
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: to act innocent, but be playful in that way when
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: you're in these situations, so that you're not waiting for
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: them to like blow you off or walk out the door,
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: or that you're not going to hear from them again. Like,
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: don't set that narrative up. Go into each situation with
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: an open, healthy, like exciting mind and if it works out, great,
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: and if it doesn't, good riddance. Thank you for sparing me.
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: You know, another person that's not going to add to
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: my life. And I think if you just adjust your
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: attitude slightly when you're dating, are you dating a lot?
• 44:58
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 44:59
  Speaker 5: I'm dating, but no a lot, But I'm dating.
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I've I've been dating a lot lately and
• 45:03
  Speaker 2: my attitude has totally changed.
• 45:05
  Speaker 3: And that advice she gave me, and you have to
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: do so.
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: A little bit of work to figure out, you know who,
• 45:10
  Speaker 2: what your exact essence is. But we all know who
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: we are deep down, and we all know what our
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: best qualities are, and so you just want to go
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: into all of these situations with a lightness instead of
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: a worried kind of feeling or paranoia that it's not
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: going to work out or are you good enough? All
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: of that is irrelevant.
• 45:29
  Speaker 5: Curses are real. I would say that you should pray
• 45:32
  Speaker 5: or do whatever thing that you believe in to help
• 45:35
  Speaker 5: protect you against that, because they are real. I don't
• 45:37
  Speaker 5: know if your friend really did that, but people courses
• 45:39
  Speaker 5: are real.
• 45:40
  Speaker 3: Well, how did she say to remove the curse? How
• 45:41
  Speaker 3: do you remove a curse?
• 45:43
  Speaker 6: So she gave me like very specific instructions about like
• 45:46
  Speaker 6: little rituals that I was supposed to do, which I
• 45:49
  Speaker 6: did because I just felt like I had nothing to lose,
• 45:51
  Speaker 6: lighting this candle and putting a baby leaf in the water,
• 45:55
  Speaker 6: things like that. I did everything that she asked, Like
• 45:58
  Speaker 6: I filled a water bottle with salt and like put
• 46:01
  Speaker 6: it in my window to like catch the moonlight, and
• 46:04
  Speaker 6: then I lit a candle and then ask for the
• 46:08
  Speaker 6: universe to remove this curse. Like I did everything that
• 46:10
  Speaker 6: she asked me to do. Basically, you just carry that
• 46:13
  Speaker 6: out and asked the universe to release the curse from you.
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: So that's what I did. Yeah, well that's going to
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: work then.
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: I mean you're doing all the things that you can do,
• 46:23
  Speaker 2: and also you know, meditate and pray on it, just
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: like do whatever your thing is.
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: Do you meditate?
• 46:29
  Speaker 6: I do, Yeah, not as consistantly as I would like to,
• 46:32
  Speaker 6: but I'm trying to build a more consistent practice of it.
• 46:35
  Speaker 2: And I think when you're meditating, when you think about
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: radiating light, like I always think about that when I meditate,
• 46:40
  Speaker 2: Like I'm such a good vibe, Like I'm just have
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: light around me, and anyone who comes in is going
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: to also get light, and anybody who doesn't deserve that
• 46:48
  Speaker 2: light that will be rebuffed by the strength of that light,
• 46:52
  Speaker 2: you know. And like I want you to think about
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: that for yourself too, because you want to keep like
• 46:56
  Speaker 2: any sort of negative energies away from you.
• 46:58
  Speaker 3: So what's the latest. You haven't been on a in
• 47:00
  Speaker 3: a few weeks.
• 47:01
  Speaker 6: So there is like a little update to the original
• 47:04
  Speaker 6: email that I wrote.
• 47:05
  Speaker 3: Actually you're married now I'm fully married.
• 47:09
  Speaker 6: So I actually ended up seeing that guy two more times,
• 47:12
  Speaker 6: but it was like the same result, Like I think
• 47:15
  Speaker 6: it was kind of like an inevitable result.
• 47:17
  Speaker 5: I'll tell you, you.
• 47:18
  Speaker 6: Know, yeah, yeah exactly like he I don't know. I mean,
• 47:23
  Speaker 6: it was just like very surprising because this man is
• 47:25
  Speaker 6: truly like thirty six years old and like did not
• 47:27
  Speaker 6: have the emotional maturity to be like, hey, like this
• 47:30
  Speaker 6: has been fun. I'm just like not interested like that.
• 47:33
  Speaker 6: Like he sort of tried to do like a slow fade,
• 47:34
  Speaker 6: and I confronted him about it, and he got very
• 47:38
  Speaker 6: uncomfortable and then you know, tried to say, oh, like
• 47:42
  Speaker 6: I'm really busy, and I was like, okay, say no more,
• 47:44
  Speaker 6: got it good, Like I'm ready to move on. I
• 47:47
  Speaker 6: don't know. I haven't been on a date since then,
• 47:49
  Speaker 6: because like the thought of going on another date just
• 47:51
  Speaker 6: made me very anxious and like frustrated. So I was like,
• 47:54
  Speaker 6: that's not that obviously, this is like not bringing me
• 47:58
  Speaker 6: joy right now.
• 47:59
  Speaker 3: So yeah, you have to be in the right head space.
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: So you have to get yourself like do that little
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: talk with yourself before any date about your essence, about
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: your intention, about being light and not having huge expectations,
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: because that's also something we fuck up. We go into
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: dates sometimes and be like, oh, I wonder if this
• 48:14
  Speaker 2: is gonna be my boyfriend, And it's like, not everybody's
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: meant to be your boyfriend. Some people are just meant
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: to have fun with. Some people are just meant because
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: they're gonna be friends, you know, and on and on.
• 48:22
  Speaker 5: Can I tell you what I do with dating. I
• 48:25
  Speaker 5: like to approach the people that I'm potentially dating the
• 48:28
  Speaker 5: way I poach friendships. So it's like, oh, I wouldn't
• 48:32
  Speaker 5: let a friend talk to me this way, so I
• 48:33
  Speaker 5: wouldn't let a potential suitor talk to me this way.
• 48:36
  Speaker 5: I wouldn't engage this way with a friend, so I
• 48:38
  Speaker 5: wouldn't engage this way with a suitor. So it's like,
• 48:41
  Speaker 5: for me, it has to be in the words of
• 48:44
  Speaker 5: Kim Catral, I don't even want to spend one hour
• 48:47
  Speaker 5: not doing something that makes me happy. So, like you
• 48:50
  Speaker 5: said it yourself, you took a break because you weren't
• 48:52
  Speaker 5: feeling it. That's cool, and then ease into it. However
• 48:55
  Speaker 5: you ease into it, but I think you have to
• 48:57
  Speaker 5: lower the stakes. Every single person is not going to
• 49:00
  Speaker 5: be the perfect person, in the same way that when
• 49:03
  Speaker 5: you meet potential friends, every single person isn't your bestie
• 49:06
  Speaker 5: all of a sudden, like it has to happen, Like
• 49:08
  Speaker 5: you have different friends that you eb and flow with,
• 49:11
  Speaker 5: So allow that to be as organic as you would
• 49:13
  Speaker 5: allow your dating life to be, because again you're in
• 49:17
  Speaker 5: theory when we date, we're looking for a partnership that
• 49:20
  Speaker 5: lasts more than six months, right, that is supportive to
• 49:24
  Speaker 5: both of the people in that partnership. So it has
• 49:26
  Speaker 5: to be like a healthy, organic exchange.
• 49:30
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: And also it's a great exercise in communication, Like it's
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: really good. That's you know, it's not for not if
• 49:36
  Speaker 2: you don't if you go on a date with somebody
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: that you don't click with, because you're getting better at communicating,
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: you're getting better at being in an uncomfortable situation and
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: making it natural. So there's advantages to going through the
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: process regardless of whether you end up with a boyfriend
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: right away, you know. And it's like I feel like
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: if you you know, you put that much effort into it,
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: you're going to yield results.
• 49:55
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I hope. So I think something that the psychic
• 50:01
  Speaker 6: said to me that was like a little less esoteric
• 50:04
  Speaker 6: and actually like really resonated with me, which she was like,
• 50:07
  Speaker 6: I feel that you have been like searching and like
• 50:11
  Speaker 6: really seeking and like really putting your energy out, and
• 50:13
  Speaker 6: she's like, I wonder what it would be like for
• 50:15
  Speaker 6: you to just sit back and like let people come
• 50:17
  Speaker 6: to you. And that really struck me, and I am
• 50:23
  Speaker 6: I'm just like now in the process of trying to
• 50:25
  Speaker 6: figure out what that looks like in real life, Like
• 50:27
  Speaker 6: how do I sort of just like sit back and
• 50:30
  Speaker 6: let people come to me?
• 50:31
  Speaker 3: You know?
• 50:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah, how do you make friends in real life?
• 50:35
  Speaker 6: I mean, this is a good question. I It's something
• 50:39
  Speaker 6: that I'm working on, Honestly. I luckily like my job.
• 50:44
  Speaker 6: I spend a lot of time meeting a lot of
• 50:46
  Speaker 6: different people. I manage a lot of studio full time
• 50:50
  Speaker 6: and I teach there. And I've actually like made friends
• 50:53
  Speaker 6: with some of my clients. Basically they started out as
• 50:56
  Speaker 6: clients and then you know, we would just spend a
• 50:58
  Speaker 6: lot of time talking after a class, and then I
• 51:00
  Speaker 6: just was like, hey, I think, you know, we should
• 51:03
  Speaker 6: hang out. I feel like we never have time to
• 51:04
  Speaker 6: like finish our conversations anyway. So like I've been able
• 51:07
  Speaker 6: to meet people that way. Outside of that, it's a
• 51:11
  Speaker 6: little bit of a it's been a little bit of
• 51:14
  Speaker 6: a challenge for me to like make friends, like as
• 51:16
  Speaker 6: an adult as I imagine it is for a lot
• 51:19
  Speaker 6: of people. But that's been really helpful. I've also been
• 51:22
  Speaker 6: trying to like go to events and stuff.
• 51:24
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean it sounds like from Pilate's at least
• 51:26
  Speaker 5: these are people who have your shared interests and you're
• 51:28
  Speaker 5: able to have like a mutual connection. So it's like,
• 51:31
  Speaker 5: I hope that as you find a perspective partner, you're
• 51:34
  Speaker 5: looking at places where you actually want to be yourself,
• 51:38
  Speaker 5: where you're actually having fun and you're attracting the energy
• 51:41
  Speaker 5: to you in those spaces, but you're not changing anything
• 51:44
  Speaker 5: about you or what your wave is, but simply being
• 51:46
  Speaker 5: yourself and doing the things that you like.
• 51:48
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I think my biggest struggle is like the things
• 51:52
  Speaker 6: that I really love to do there just like aren't
• 51:54
  Speaker 6: a lot of straight men there, and I think a
• 51:57
  Speaker 6: lot about Like is the reason why and like I
• 52:01
  Speaker 6: feel more comfortable is because there are no straight.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: And that's I mean, I think you speak for lots
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: of women when you talk about preferring areas spaces without
• 52:11
  Speaker 2: straight men. I think we can all relate to that.
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: When you're on dates, are you very like are you
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: do you sit back and let it happen or are
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: you like controlling or steering the conversation.
• 52:23
  Speaker 6: It really depends on the person. I try to. I
• 52:26
  Speaker 6: try to be conscious of like not talking about myself
• 52:30
  Speaker 6: for the entire time, and also because like I do,
• 52:33
  Speaker 6: I am curious about the other person. But there are
• 52:36
  Speaker 6: times when I feel like, if I don't ask a question,
• 52:40
  Speaker 6: this person is just going to sit here and like
• 52:42
  Speaker 6: let it be dead silence.
• 52:43
  Speaker 3: And honestly, like do people do that on dates? Do
• 52:45
  Speaker 3: people just sit there in second silence?
• 52:47
  Speaker 6: Yeah, well no, they just they just kind of wait
• 52:50
  Speaker 6: for you to ask them a question, like I'm I'm
• 52:53
  Speaker 6: interviewing them, And sometimes like if I get frustrated, I
• 52:57
  Speaker 6: will just sit there because I'm like, this is not
• 53:02
  Speaker 6: I'm not going to interview you. But I really try
• 53:06
  Speaker 6: to like let there be a conversation. But occasionally, yes, there's.
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: Not pretty fucking awkward when you're on a first date
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: with somebody and you're sitting there in silence.
• 53:14
  Speaker 3: That's like, yeah, well then you're not a good match.
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: No, yeah, they're not going a conversation.
• 53:19
  Speaker 5: It's a hard thing to hear, but you know.
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: But anyway, you're going to get rid of this spell
• 53:22
  Speaker 2: if you haven't already you're going to get rid of that.
• 53:25
  Speaker 3: That's going to do. You just have to think of
• 53:26
  Speaker 3: that as gone.
• 53:27
  Speaker 2: You did everything you had to do to get rid
• 53:30
  Speaker 2: of it, and you're going to just kind of adjust
• 53:32
  Speaker 2: your expectations and understand that you're going to go into
• 53:35
  Speaker 2: these dates with just a little bit of a lighter
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: attitude about it and not look at it as a
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: reflection of you each date. And also get out there more.
• 53:42
  Speaker 2: Do other stuff in your community so that you can
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: meet other people. Go rock climbing, go to one of
• 53:47
  Speaker 2: those classes. You'll find some straight guys there. You know,
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: go to play tennis, or you know, you could join
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: a book club to make girlfriends.
• 53:53
  Speaker 3: I mean, I'm sure there's no straight guys in a
• 53:55
  Speaker 3: fucking book club.
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: But just be actively trying to like widen your circle
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: of comfort and put yourself out there a little bit more,
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: and I think that will yield results.
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: Also, it always does. Yeah, what city are you in?
• 54:08
  Speaker 6: I'm in New York.
• 54:08
  Speaker 2: Oh well, hello, there's plenty going on here, sister, lots
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: of action everywhere you look. So just go down to
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: the pier. There's men there all the time. Just go
• 54:20
  Speaker 2: to the pier and wait.
• 54:22
  Speaker 3: Yea, all right, all right, thanks for calling you us
• 54:24
  Speaker 3: posted Okay, okay, thanks bye bye.
• 54:29
  Speaker 2: We'll take a break and we'll be right back to
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: close out with z Way and we're back.
• 54:38
  Speaker 3: She was real cute.
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: It's amazing how women are so worried about men, even me.
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: Like a woman like me, you would think we wouldn't
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: have issues with men, and I do too. They're just
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: it's a hot mess situation dating.
• 54:51
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm the older I get the more you're nineteen,
• 54:55
  Speaker 5: goog got so from what when you were sick? From
• 54:57
  Speaker 5: when I was seven? Thank you? A year after. I'm
• 55:00
  Speaker 5: trying to get to a place where I don't need
• 55:05
  Speaker 5: a man, and I just like whatever comes into my
• 55:09
  Speaker 5: life is cool.
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well I'm at that place and eventually you need penetration.
• 55:14
  Speaker 5: That's true.
• 55:14
  Speaker 3: And what I said to my might I said to
• 55:17
  Speaker 3: my therapist, she goes, what do you want exactly?
• 55:19
  Speaker 5: What about toys?
• 55:20
  Speaker 3: And I that's not as fun. I like a man,
• 55:22
  Speaker 3: you know, I like a man.
• 55:23
  Speaker 5: So sometimes you have sex and it's like not that good.
• 55:25
  Speaker 3: No, that's true.
• 55:26
  Speaker 5: But what I'd be alone?
• 55:27
  Speaker 3: But I would I'd rather be alone than have bad sex.
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: Also, but what I would like and this has happened
• 55:32
  Speaker 2: once in my life before, and I liked that setup.
• 55:34
  Speaker 3: I like having men just all casual men and differentations rotation,
• 55:39
  Speaker 3: different New.
• 55:40
  Speaker 2: York, La, Spain, London, just different guys to have sex
• 55:44
  Speaker 2: with and real fun, flirty.
• 55:46
  Speaker 3: No like, no serious commitment.
• 55:48
  Speaker 2: If I fall in love with one of them, great,
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: then that could become a serious commitment. But to go,
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: And she and I started laughing because I thought as
• 55:53
  Speaker 2: soon as I said that she was.
• 55:54
  Speaker 3: Going to go.
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: First of all, no one really wants that. And she's like,
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: that sounds awesome. She's like, that's it's alsome. I go,
• 56:00
  Speaker 2: that's exactly what I want. I want fun and flirty
• 56:03
  Speaker 2: and light and like you go and you have fun
• 56:05
  Speaker 2: with someone and you're not stuck with them long enough
• 56:08
  Speaker 2: for anybody to get on each other's nerves, you know
• 56:10
  Speaker 2: what I mean. That's how I would like to And
• 56:13
  Speaker 2: when I'm single and I have money and I can
• 56:15
  Speaker 2: do what I want, there's no reason I shouldn't be
• 56:17
  Speaker 2: doing that.
• 56:18
  Speaker 3: You know, I don't want this body to go to waste.
• 56:20
  Speaker 5: I mean, so why are you and why aren't you
• 56:22
  Speaker 5: doing that? I am doing that?
• 56:22
  Speaker 2: Okay, So so you have a perfect life, Yeah, I
• 56:24
  Speaker 2: started doing that as soon as I talked to my therapist. Okay, okay,
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: And just to clarify at the end of this episode,
• 56:29
  Speaker 2: I would just like to clarify that zea Way, I
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: did fall for her bullshit. But she's thirty one, so
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: she's not nineteen. She's half of she's half, she's twice
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: as whatever.
• 56:39
  Speaker 3: You get the drift older than that.
• 56:40
  Speaker 2: Nineteen times two is not thirty one. Okay, Well that's it.
• 56:44
  Speaker 3: That's for that. Well that was an episode. Yes, yes,
• 56:46
  Speaker 3: thank you zee Way for being here today. Its very
• 56:49
  Speaker 3: nice to meet you.
• 56:50
  Speaker 5: Thank you for having me Chelsea. You're an icon, You're
• 56:52
  Speaker 5: legend Chelsea lately Chelsea presently.
• 56:55
  Speaker 3: Yes, thank you.
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: Okay, So show dates coming up Canadian These are for Canadians, guys.
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: I'm coming January nineteenth, Edmonton January twentieth, Saskatoon February ninth.
• 57:07
  Speaker 2: I'll be in Winnipeg February twenty third. Calgary that is
• 57:10
  Speaker 2: almost sold out, so get your tickets. Victoria, BC is
• 57:14
  Speaker 2: March eighth. March ninth is Colowna, also almost sold out.
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: Not sure if I'm adding second shows yet because of
• 57:19
  Speaker 2: my schedule. Vancouver is March twenty ninth.
• 57:23
  Speaker 3: And that is almost sold out.
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: Then i will be in Salt Lake City April fourth
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: and Denver April fifth. I'm coming to Arizona at Maricopa
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: April twelfth. April thirteen, I'll be in Brooks, California at
• 57:35
  Speaker 2: the Cash Creek Casino. And then I'm going to be
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: in Santa Rosa Sunday, April fourteenth. I'm coming to Richmond, Virginia, Baltimore,
• 57:43
  Speaker 2: Maryland on April twentieth, Gary, Indiana, Prior Lake, Minnesota. Coming
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: to Oklahoma Norman, Oklahoma on May third and May fourth.
• 57:53
  Speaker 2: I will be in Thackerville, Oklahoma for my rescheduled Windstar
• 57:56
  Speaker 2: World Casino date.
• 57:58
  Speaker 3: I'm coming to.
• 57:59
  Speaker 2: Englewood, cal Saturday, May eleventh at the YouTube Theater.
• 58:03
  Speaker 3: This is for the Netflix Is a Joke Festival.
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: I'll be performing with Fortune, Fimestir and Matteo Lane and
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: Samjay and Vanessa Gonzalez. And then i will be in Verona,
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: New York on May twenty sixth, and then I'm coming
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: to Australia in July and New Zealand July fifth, Auckland
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: and I'm coming to Wellington, New Zealand.
• 58:24
  Speaker 3: Melbourne, Brisbane, Sydney, and then.
• 58:27
  Speaker 2: Thursday, August first, which is a long way away and
• 58:31
  Speaker 2: a date I am just seeing that I am not
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: ready to announce. Okay, so those are all my dates
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: for that are up and available, So get your tickets.
• 58:40
  Speaker 3: I can't wait to see you. Yeah, that's it.
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: and engineered by Brad Dickard executive producer Catherine Law and
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: com