Latest / Love You Moore with Willie Moore Jr. / Dr. Irishea Hilliard on Divorce, Dating, Therapy, Calling & Starting Over | Willie Moore Jr.

Transcript

Dr. Irishea Hilliard on Divorce, Dating, Therapy, Calling & Starting Over | Willie Moore Jr. · Love You Moore with Willie Moore Jr.

• 0:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: Well, I'd already been through a little bit because my father and my parents have been pastoring since the day after they got married.
• 0:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: So all my life I've been a PK.
• 0:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
• 0:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: I got pregnant at 19 in college.
• 0:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I faced that backlash of being the PK, you know, how they say, we always entropyl.
• 0:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: doing the same thing everybody else does, but I got pregnant.
• 0:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so then when it came time for the divorce, I was actually passed in one of our locations.
• 0:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: So under the scrutiny of all that, you know, everybody figured I had done something wrong because I didn't sit down.
• 0:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: So they wanted me to sit down, but it wasn't that I had done something wrong.
• 0:43
  [SPEAKER_03]: We just, we were young.
• 0:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: I can look back now and say we were young.
• 0:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: I didn't know me, he didn't know him.
• 0:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: And as we progressed in life, you wake up and you're looking you like, what did I do?
• 0:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: Hey family, Willie Mo Jr. here excited about another edition of the Love You More Show.
• 1:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: This conversation is going to be so fruitful for you.
• 1:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: So do me a favor, stick around.
• 1:07
  [SPEAKER_05]: We got a lot of different chapters that we're going to literally navigate through.
• 1:11
  [SPEAKER_05]: I believe it's going to be beneficial to you.
• 1:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: Here's the thing, 63% of you guys are not subscribed to this channel.
• 1:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: I can't have it, mm-hmm.
• 1:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Let me tell you what I need you to do.
• 1:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: Subscribe to this channel quickly.
• 1:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: You know why?
• 1:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because these conversations are going to be so fruitful and with your subscription, it actually tells the algorithm and YouTube world that, hey, this has been official.
• 1:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: And if you feel like it's been beneficial to you, go ahead and join the family by simply subscribe.
• 1:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: And here's the thing, if you knew, you just a newcomer.
• 1:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: saying someone ticked off Instagram somewhere and you was like, man, let me see what's going on.
• 1:42
  [SPEAKER_05]: Just trust me, it's fruitful.
• 1:44
  [SPEAKER_05]: Okay, let's go ahead and get that out the way.
• 1:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: And finally, I want to show love to my partners, our X outreach.
• 1:49
  [SPEAKER_05]: Family, we know that this crazy, Medicare system has allowed so much extra fees to be put on your medicine.
• 1:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: that sometimes you need to take in your medicine.
• 2:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: You're just trusting the good Lord.
• 2:01
  [SPEAKER_05]: Well, family, you do not have to just trust God.
• 2:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: You can also have resources.
• 2:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: If you can't afford your medicine anymore, I don't want you struggling with that cost.
• 2:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: My friends at RX Outreach can get you your medicine for little to no cost.
• 2:17
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm serious about that.
• 2:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Sound too good to be true, trust your nephew Willie Moore Jr. All you gotta do is go to rxoutreach.org.
• 2:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: Right there, rxoutreach.org, forward slash Willie Moore Jr. Or call this little number right here, put it right there in your corner.
• 2:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: You see it?
• 2:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: Bye.
• 2:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: Shout out to my friends at rxoutreach.
• 2:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: Now, it's time for the episode.
• 2:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: You're my love, you're my love, you're my Well, we back in the saddle again, come on somebody.
• 2:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: Family, you know, I send you on Instagram.
• 2:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: I send you on my YouTube short saying, Willie, you need to start talking to the ladies a little bit more.
• 3:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: Let me tell you something, you right?
• 3:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm with you when you're right.
• 3:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: And so today, listen, I'm doing my best to fulfill the request that many of you all had.
• 3:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: Today I get the opportunity to sit down with a powerhouse.
• 3:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: A woman who is a woman of all women.
• 3:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: She does a best to empower women, not only with her ministry, biblically, but with her story.
• 3:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: Now today, I just found out that I'm in saying her name wrong.
• 3:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: But everybody's saying wrong she said only a handful of people actually saying right I said put your hand out like this right here I put mine in there and I said wooly mojun you're gonna say right doctor.
• 3:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: I reached her heal your it's in the house What's going on since what's going on?
• 3:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: I made it I made it.
• 3:42
  [SPEAKER_05]: I made it You know, I can't say yeah, okay, so but not really they say I'll preachers You know what I took me so long to preach and stuff
• 3:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, I, I can't believe it.
• 3:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: You don't hoop at the end.
• 3:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: No, say yeah, say yeah, say yeah, say yeah.
• 4:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: You can think he gave me other gifts besides that cause no.
• 4:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: You, but I can lead you in a break.
• 4:08
  [SPEAKER_05]: You can praise.
• 4:09
  [SPEAKER_05]: Okay.
• 4:09
  [SPEAKER_05]: We can praise God.
• 4:11
  [SPEAKER_05]: Good.
• 4:11
  [SPEAKER_05]: What you look amazing.
• 4:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: Thank you.
• 4:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I want to start by saying, I'm so proud of you.
• 4:15
  [SPEAKER_05]: I kind of watch from a distance, right?
• 4:17
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because you know, Willie and pretty women give me a trouble.
• 4:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: Don't want no trouble with people.
• 4:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because they've tried to make you go viral.
• 4:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: As soon as you've seen you, he'd like three or her pose.
• 4:26
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm trying to just say, Lord of God, from a distance, huh?
• 4:29
  [SPEAKER_05]: Praise the Lord.
• 4:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: But here on the love you more show, we like to do what we call icebreaker.
• 4:33
  [SPEAKER_05]: Okay, I watch.
• 4:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm a subscriber.
• 4:36
  [SPEAKER_05]: Come on, listen.
• 4:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: She is not a part of that crazy season through business.
• 4:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm in the group to subscribe.
• 4:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'll look.
• 4:42
  [SPEAKER_05]: So with this icebreaker, we're going to start with a new clap word for me.
• 4:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: Check this out.
• 4:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: So why if you started counseling, she thought it would be a good idea for me to come to counseling.
• 4:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: Man, I don't know if I really want to do this.
• 4:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because I know she's been telling this woman all my business.
• 4:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: I walk in the counseling.
• 4:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: I didn't know her counselor would this fine.
• 4:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: She even telling all my business.
• 4:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: I walk in.
• 5:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: Hey, ladies.
• 5:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, I was at the wrong spot and I'm on.
• 5:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: Thank you for joining us truly my honor Willy mull she nice to meet you my honor.
• 5:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: This is my counselor April so nice to meet her wifey like so glad you can make it darling It's truly my honor.
• 5:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: You look amazing You do too energy in the room a little tears wife until my business
• 5:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: So let's talk this out and from a hug I'm like, okay, you ready?
• 5:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: I am, you know, um, whatever you want me to do, I'm with it.
• 5:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: Are you going to tell the truth?
• 5:33
  [SPEAKER_05]: I promise I'm going to tell the truth, you weren't it?
• 5:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: Well, I was a little like a Christmas tree when I told her she was worth the child.
• 5:46
  [SPEAKER_04]: I would do you better.
• 5:48
  [SPEAKER_04]: That's what you had.
• 5:49
  [SPEAKER_04]: But I have to use like the clock around.
• 5:51
  [SPEAKER_04]: You know what stops?
• 5:52
  [SPEAKER_04]: This is.
• 6:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: Well, somebody saying pretty Willie is back.
• 6:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: I said, no, it's just Willie Mo Jr.
• 6:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: I believe that there are so many new answers to relationships and I see so many artists who get the opportunity to speak about it, who don't serve God.
• 7:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: So I promise you this, that when I do music, it will always be good enough that if Jesus sit on the right side right there in the car with me, I could turn it up and not be ashamed.
• 7:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: So make sure that you go straight in, clock work.
• 7:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: Now, I reach you.
• 7:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: You see, I got it right again.
• 7:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's how you got in the beginning of the conversation.
• 7:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: In the beginning of the icebreaker, I got an opportunity to go to counseling.
• 7:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: And it's kind of a simulation of what me and my former wife had to go through.
• 7:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: We went through counseling.
• 7:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: You were married for 12 years.
• 7:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: What type of counseling did you all do to try to hold down before the official uncoplay?
• 7:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, of course my my father's a pastor.
• 7:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: So we tried to talk to them.
• 7:53
  [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah.
• 7:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: And then, you know, you have couple friends.
• 7:55
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so we had couple friends like a accountability group that we were connected to.
• 8:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so we tried it all.
• 8:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, I had even reached this place in my mind.
• 8:04
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was like, Lord, if this is my lot in life, I'm all right.
• 8:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: Like, because I've always had this desire, like, God, I just want to please you.
• 8:11
  [SPEAKER_03]: So this is my lot to be in this relationship.
• 8:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm going to figure out my part.
• 8:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: So we tried several things.
• 8:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
• 8:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: Well, let me take this off because I didn't miss it.
• 8:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: Let's go.
• 8:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: I don't know what this happened.
• 8:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: Turn the arrow on in here, because Lord have mercy on me.
• 8:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: Okay.
• 8:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: So that had to be tough, right?
• 8:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 8:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: So this past few episodes, I've been sitting down with bishops and just really getting into the mind of
• 8:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: Bishops, I've realized just how much prex pressure and expectation the people that large have on people because they're Christians and Christianity, it's like humanity is overlooked.
• 8:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: What type of backlash did you get for being the Bishops' daughter and now you have to go through on company?
• 8:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: Well, I'd already been through a little bit because my father and my parents have been pasturing since the day after they got married.
• 9:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: So all my life have been a P.K.
• 9:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: I got pregnant at 19 in college.
• 9:11
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I faced that backlash of being the P.K., you know, how they say we always in trouble doing the same thing everybody else does, but I got pregnant.
• 9:21
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so then when it
• 9:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: So under the scrutiny of all that, you know, everybody figured I had done something wrong because I didn't sit down.
• 9:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: So they wanted me to sit down, but it wasn't that I had done something wrong.
• 9:38
  [SPEAKER_03]: We just, we were young.
• 9:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: I can look back now and say we were young.
• 9:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: I didn't know me, he didn't know him.
• 9:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: And as we progressed in life, you wake up and you're looking, you're like, what did I do?
• 9:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: And the person I am today is not the person I was when I walked down that aisle and so it just, you know, once he left, I gave it a period because even my board stepped in because I was already on the trajectory of becoming the senior pastor.
• 10:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: So my father had already declared that I would be his successor and here I am going through divorce.
• 10:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: So my board says, hey, before you do anything, wait 90 days.
• 10:17
  [SPEAKER_03]: don't don't go follow paperwork.
• 10:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: He's not in the house, but don't do anything.
• 10:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: Don't date.
• 10:23
  [SPEAKER_03]: Don't talk to anybody just be still for 90 days and then figure out what you want to do.
• 10:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I submitted myself to the process.
• 10:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 10:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: So you 19, you get pregnant.
• 10:33
  [SPEAKER_05]: Do you marry?
• 10:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: Is that kind of like something that they just put together?
• 10:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because you know, sometimes.
• 10:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: She's pregnant.
• 10:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: Go and marry him.
• 10:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: No, so that doesn't think it's a whole not the person.
• 10:42
  [SPEAKER_05]: Okay, well, let's run this for y'all judgment.
• 10:44
  [SPEAKER_05]: Come on, don't judge, but I do have the ads.
• 10:49
  [SPEAKER_05]: What was it like 19 and pregnant?
• 10:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: And let me tell you this, you know, I like to build a bridge to testimony.
• 10:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: Of course, I'm adopted.
• 10:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: And my mom had she was pregnant at 17 and a half.
• 11:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then pregnant again at 19 with me.
• 11:03
  [SPEAKER_05]: and she made a strong decision which was a promotion to me to give me the option to be adopted.
• 11:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then, of course, I go on and get a beautiful forever family.
• 11:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, how much strength did it take you at 19 years old to say, hey, I'm going to keep this shot.
• 11:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because there are a lot of options out there.
• 11:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: a whole lot.
• 11:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: I don't know if I've ever shared this.
• 11:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: So, you know, my mom, the Holy Spirit will bust you out.
• 11:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I knew I was pregnant, but I hadn't told my mom.
• 11:29
  [SPEAKER_03]: My mom calls me it's finals in school.
• 11:32
  [SPEAKER_03]: My grades are still good.
• 11:33
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm in college.
• 11:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: And she says, one of your friends called and told me you were pregnant.
• 11:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: go get a pregnancy test.
• 11:40
  [SPEAKER_03]: Well, I already knew I was pregnant so I didn't need a pregnancy test.
• 11:43
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so once they found out, it was like, what are you gonna do?
• 11:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: Well, I've always been very career-focused what I wanna do and I was like, a baby is not in the car.
• 11:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so, you know, I got home from school and I was like, I'm putting them up for adoption.
• 11:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I mean, I did all the research, I did all the research, and my family, what we do when crisis happens a lot of times we've been together.
• 12:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I think one of my sisters was like, what I raised him, you're not going to put up a child in our family up for adoption, I raised him.
• 12:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: And the independent like just righteous like you're not going to raise my baby.
• 12:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm not going to sit around like you raised my baby.
• 12:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: And that's what made me decide.
• 12:24
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was going to step into motherhood.
• 12:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: Coolness.
• 12:27
  [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah.
• 12:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: Just coolness.
• 12:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: Coolness and 19 about the grace of God.
• 12:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: I made it through amazing young man gifted, call, chosen, and I made the best decision.
• 12:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: It was a difficult for you to date having the child so young.
• 12:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: Absolutely.
• 12:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I think that's almost kind of how I got into the situation with my husband.
• 12:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: We both grew up in the same church.
• 12:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: His mom said on the road behind my parents.
• 12:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: He said on the road behind, you know, he was like the star guy football player.
• 13:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: We grew up together.
• 13:04
  [SPEAKER_03]: So then he likes me.
• 13:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I have this, you know, six, seven month old baby.
• 13:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: So, you know, parents are like, my mom is like,
• 13:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: He love his mother.
• 13:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: He's like, I'm like, okay, cool.
• 13:17
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I was kind of on the fence anyway, but I think a lot of times we put this pressure on on young people to fix it.
• 13:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I think if I look back, I felt the pressure of fix your wrong quote unquote.
• 13:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: Now that young guy is looking at you, you've got the baby.
• 13:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: It's the perfect story, the guy in the church, the start at the lead, the preacher's daughter, get together.
• 13:41
  [SPEAKER_03]: It's a match made in heaven.
• 13:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I think I was really trying to fix her off.
• 13:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: When did you discover that this may have been the wrong decision?
• 13:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: To be honest?
• 13:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: I think on my honeymoon, here's a funny story.
• 13:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: So let me tell you how church you got with us back then.
• 14:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: My honeymoon was on a church cruise.
• 14:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: So,
• 14:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: How do you, you can't get no drinks.
• 14:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, no church crews, unless you put it in the cocaine and you walk around with the cocaine and you put it in there.
• 14:17
  [SPEAKER_05]: Nothing I've ever done it.
• 14:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: Listen, but in that period of my life, you know, once you have messed up and the eye is on you, you wanna do everything right.
• 14:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I'm trying to do everything right.
• 14:29
  [SPEAKER_03]: My parents have given me a beautiful wedding.
• 14:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, like,
• 14:33
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, you know, let me say this.
• 14:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: My ex-husband is also the father of my youngest son and
• 14:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, we have grown to get an understanding with each other and I'm grateful for the gift.
• 14:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: So no shade to him because I don't want nobody in the family calling me like, why are you by someone like that?
• 15:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: But so we're on the honeymoon, churches there, and we're sitting at the table eating and I'm like, who is that smacking?
• 15:10
  [SPEAKER_03]: And my dad was like, that's your husband.
• 15:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I was like, no, more love you more podcast after this.
• 15:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: every day, people are forced to make impossible choices.
• 15:23
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• 15:28
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• 15:31
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• 15:47
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• 15:49
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• 15:56
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• 15:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: Flat out.
• 16:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: adversity tried to name you, but it doesn't get the final word.
• 16:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: You're not what you've been through.
• 16:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: You are what God bought you through.
• 16:21
  [SPEAKER_03]: If your past has been whispering that you're stuck, hear me, you're not stuck, you're strengthened, and cis,
• 16:29
  [SPEAKER_03]: victory is possible.
• 16:32
  [SPEAKER_03]: It's time to step over adversity.
• 16:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: Own your power because God has more for you.
• 16:37
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• 16:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: Go register right now and she Rosely.com.
• 16:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: now back to the love you more podcast.
• 17:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: So we're on the honeymoon, churches there, and we're sitting at the table eating in a mine.
• 17:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: Who is that smacking?
• 17:11
  [SPEAKER_03]: And my dad was like, that's your husband.
• 17:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I was like, no, because when you're dating and you're trying to get it right, most of the time you're in a cloud, you're not really at 21, 2021, I wasn't thinking about all that.
• 17:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I woke up on my honeymoon like, who is this dude?
• 17:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: we had such differences.
• 17:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: And then over the years, we start just keeping people around us and you know, everybody would live with us.
• 17:41
  [SPEAKER_03]: Some of the teens in the church would live with us.
• 17:43
  [SPEAKER_03]: It was always people around.
• 17:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: So we didn't have to deal with that we really weren't as compatible as we thought.
• 17:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: Why?
• 17:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 17:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: So now we do 12 years knowing that the first day that this was going to be unique.
• 17:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: Why did you feel like you had to continuously track down this role versus making a strong decision for yourself before 12 years in?
• 18:07
  [SPEAKER_05]: Or was it just very difficult to make a strong decision for Dr. Hild, like how was it for you?
• 18:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, you can't say it was all bad times.
• 18:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: I had a baby.
• 18:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: So you know, we made it work.
• 18:21
  [SPEAKER_03]: That was in the season two of spiritual encounter and let's get real.
• 18:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm on the word network every Saturday and ministry is moving at a fast pace.
• 18:32
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, we've navigated a major car accident where I got thrown from a car.
• 18:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, life is life thing.
• 18:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so you're trying to figure it out
• 18:43
  [SPEAKER_03]: And kind of close to about that 10th year, it was like, this same work conformist, we had just built our dream home.
• 18:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I was like, this is not it.
• 18:55
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, and of course my father was like, use your faith, use your faith.
• 18:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so finally I was like, dad, I've used my faith.
• 19:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I don't really like him.
• 19:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I don't even know if he really likes me.
• 19:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: Use your faith and so situations happen and he left and I kind of had this rule.
• 19:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was like, are you leaving for a day?
• 19:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: One day?
• 19:17
  [SPEAKER_03]: Are you leaving for a couple days?
• 19:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: What you doing?
• 19:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: Because if you walk out that door, I don't really do revolving doors like this.
• 19:23
  [SPEAKER_03]: So let me know what we're doing.
• 19:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: And he left that day and never came back.
• 19:29
  [SPEAKER_03]: What did they do to you as a woman?
• 19:32
  [SPEAKER_03]: Divorce is the hardest thing that you could ever go through.
• 19:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: I will tell anybody, it may seem like it's easy.
• 19:40
  [SPEAKER_03]: You cannot like each other and you still feel the separation.
• 19:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yes.
• 19:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I'm the better.
• 19:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: I really am.
• 19:49
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm a better woman.
• 19:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm a better mother.
• 19:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, I had to crack down.
• 19:54
  [SPEAKER_03]: I had two boys that I'm now responsible solely for really.
• 20:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so just cracking down, still maintaining ministry, still maintaining, you know, preaching every Sunday.
• 20:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I learned how to cry in the background and wipe your face and go out there and say, all right, God, you do the rest.
• 20:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: And it toughened me, but I was committed that I wasn't gonna be bitter.
• 20:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: I wanted it to make me better.
• 20:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I found out that at the table for one is really where God meets you.
• 20:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: And when you really look at certain situations in the Bible that God will always pull someone outside of their situation, he'll meet them minister to them and then shift the trajectory of their life.
• 20:40
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I felt like I was in that season where God met me at that table.
• 20:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: He's shaped me and really shifted the whole trajectory of my life.
• 20:49
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's so good.
• 20:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: Thank you for sharing.
• 20:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
• 20:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: Who taught you to cry in the background?
• 20:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: And still go up there and do what you have to do.
• 20:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: I had a great mentor in my dad.
• 21:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I remember one
• 21:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: When service, we had a big fight.
• 21:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: We had a big fight on the way to church.
• 21:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: So, you know, I'm a female, so I'm mad.
• 21:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: My, I mean, I'm upset.
• 21:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: So we had this big fight and I get to church.
• 21:15
  [SPEAKER_03]: Now, mind you, I'm on the pastoral step.
• 21:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm doing youth ministry.
• 21:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I go sit in the balcony of the church because I'm that upset.
• 21:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I'm sitting up in the balcony.
• 21:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: And my dad is like, why do you have that?
• 21:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was like, cause I don't want to be bothered with nobody.
• 21:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: I just don't want to be bothered today.
• 21:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: And my dad was like, when people come, they don't care about your stuff, deal with your stuff outside because when people come to hear you, they're coming to get home, they're coming to get answers.
• 21:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: They're not concerned about what you're going through.
• 21:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: don't bring that into this place.
• 21:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I learned how to do that.
• 21:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: That I valued the ministry moment that even in some of the hardest seasons of my life, I just went through a really tough time.
• 22:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: I had to understand people don't come for you to cry in front of them.
• 22:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: They come to get answers to their situation.
• 22:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: And an example of how do you navigate through when life throws you curveballs and it throws it goes upside down.
• 22:15
  [SPEAKER_05]: You know, I see that mostly with pastors and politicians, you know, because I get an opportunity to sit in this seat.
• 22:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: Although very fun, very entertaining.
• 22:24
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, you know, I love the Lord.
• 22:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I get an opportunity to sit with dignitaries and politicians and pastors and I counsel and coach.
• 22:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: So many great men and I ask them the same thing.
• 22:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: Who told you that you had to do that?
• 22:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: I think it's really amazing to muster the strength and the energy to show up for what you're called to do.
• 22:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: But even Jesus pulled away in secluded areas and said, man, I'm going to take a break from you guys for a minute until like, like, I'm just as human as I am God.
• 22:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I have to be able to take these moments.
• 22:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: Have you ever seen somebody navigate the waters with the pressure that you had to deal with?
• 23:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: Have you ever looked
• 23:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: I wish I would have did it that way.
• 23:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: That was, that same like that worked a little better.
• 23:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: I don't think so.
• 23:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: I think you got to be careful and bleeding on people.
• 23:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: That I think, you know, that's, that's the,
• 23:23
  [SPEAKER_03]: the generational divide because now social media, I'm gonna be real, this is who I am, don't get every bit of me.
• 23:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: And then we come from a previous generation that's like, we don't tell nothing.
• 23:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: No, no, no, no, no, no.
• 23:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I think there has to be a happy medium so that you're not hurting in silence, but you get the answers.
• 23:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: You find places that are safe.
• 23:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: I think sometimes people talk in places that aren't safe,
• 23:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: So while it is your assignment, it may not be the place for you to believe.
• 23:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: Jesus didn't believe with everybody.
• 24:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: But have you taken a break?
• 24:03
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, when I went up, when, when, okay, not to make it super deep, but I joke because it gets real deep.
• 24:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because I pray for you on the trail meal today.
• 24:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: I was like, even on break, she don't break.
• 24:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: I don't.
• 24:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I was like, I don't know her like the guy like that I'm even my place.
• 24:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: but there's so much more revelation, not in the spiritual world, but there's entrepreneurship ventures that you have been like, I need to get to that, I need to get to that, but that only comes in a season of like saying, I got a wrist, and I like your father, because I love your father, I don't know him to like him because I've never really met him hung out, but could it be, just a question, like, could it be the example that you saw was a good example for him?
• 24:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: but you may have to trick a new role to say, hey man, we take 34 today's arrest every year.
• 24:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, absolutely.
• 24:57
  [SPEAKER_03]: Like, my Monday is a really non-negotiable.
• 25:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
• 25:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: So like, my father enjoys work.
• 25:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: When he's on vacation, he's writing, steal in his restructure life.
• 25:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: He still works.
• 25:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, he loves it.
• 25:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, I can't wait to meet you one day, man.
• 25:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: I got to say never met you shout out to you and be bigger than me.
• 25:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: I want no problem for as long as, you know, you're six, like, six.
• 25:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: Exactly.
• 25:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's like business, business, jakes, but I've been here.
• 25:24
  [SPEAKER_05]: I said, man, it's a pleasure to meet you.
• 25:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: I said, all that stuff, then people be talking about online.
• 25:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: If they send you in person, they wouldn't say, yo, neck big, you tell us that this boy's crazy.
• 25:33
  [SPEAKER_03]: He's a tall man from the hood, a fifth ward of Houston.
• 25:38
  [SPEAKER_03]: Absolutely.
• 25:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I've discovered that, that his recipe and my recipe are not the same.
• 25:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: So my Monday is on the Ghost Book.
• 25:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm in just workout clothes on Monday, leave me alone.
• 25:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: I have this thing with the staff.
• 25:55
  [SPEAKER_03]: If the building is not on fire and somebody that has dear to my heart has not died,
• 26:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 26:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
• 26:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's so good.
• 26:07
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's like entertainment stuff.
• 26:09
  [SPEAKER_05]: Do you ever think about entertainment stuff, like writing stuff and all of that?
• 26:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know what?
• 26:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: Well, and more junior, I did not come on.
• 26:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, I really do enjoy writing, and I haven't done it as much as I should.
• 26:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, that's the void guy showing me now that he's like, I've been tugging you to write, screen plays, books, entertainment, different sectors.
• 26:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, you don't have a faith-based undertone.
• 26:33
  [SPEAKER_05]: but it's really mainstream.
• 26:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, I love the position that you're in.
• 26:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: I love what God is doing.
• 26:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: I sit there and watch the plethora of messages with you 12 o'clock, so you pray, isn't it?
• 26:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: I even watched the women's stuff and I'm sitting there trying to get into my spirit.
• 26:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: So when I take it to the tree and meal, some people pray in the closet, I do that if I.
• 26:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: But when I get on that tree and meal, God gives me a revelation.
• 26:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: I was like, okay, now God, what you want to do with this one?
• 26:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: And he's like, okay, well, I need her to rest, right?
• 26:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: I need her to find some time to rest.
• 26:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then he showed me like entertainment, like scripts and stuff.
• 27:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: And the unique part is that you have all the resources for it.
• 27:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: You just, it just doesn't, it doesn't make itself a parent until that part is done.
• 27:10
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so you know what, I want you to do this on shelves to other people.
• 27:15
  [SPEAKER_03]: I didn't think you were going to do it to me, but I love it.
• 27:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: And you know, I just said the other day, you know, our family went through a really trying 2024, 2024, 2025.
• 27:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
• 27:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: And um,
• 27:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: That was a whole another place of going through life in the public eye.
• 27:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so, my, I carry people on my back, I'm a protector.
• 27:41
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so, to show up for my family, to show up for my kids, to show up for my church, was super important.
• 27:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: I just said the other day I was like,
• 27:49
  [SPEAKER_03]: I need a break.
• 27:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I'm working on it.
• 27:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm planning something right now to get a break.
• 27:55
  [SPEAKER_03]: But that that's that writing is is a is a joy of my heart that I have set on the shelf that I take the I take the critique.
• 28:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: I take I take the
• 28:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: I take the charge.
• 28:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: I will listen, partying on.
• 28:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love you, though.
• 28:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: You can't be talking to the pastor.
• 28:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: Hey, let me tell you something.
• 28:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: The bishops didn't get nothing for me.
• 28:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: I was like, God, you ain't got nothing for the bishops.
• 28:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: They're like, I, well, the bishops are going to give it on.
• 28:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, I learned a lot from the bishops because I had to see, because I know what God has me doing later in life and it's just certain things.
• 28:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm just taking notes like I'm such a student of what you guys get the opportunity to do, right?
• 28:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like to serve people to lead people in such a capacity as I was
• 28:36
  [SPEAKER_05]: I got to keep it real with you, because your last name, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll, he'll
• 28:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: They're not A.
• 28:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: Some guys they scared of you.
• 29:01
  [SPEAKER_05]: You know, cause I'm kidding.
• 29:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: Some of us are, some of us are never scared.
• 29:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, I heard all of this stuff like, you know, a woman in the kind of position that I mean, I mean, like,
• 29:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: I run a major a church is a church, but it's still a corporation.
• 29:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I'm running a major corporation.
• 29:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've got two boys.
• 29:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've got Reverend Hill good.
• 29:24
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, there are things like oh, is she a man eater is she and when people get to know me, they'd be like, you're nothing like I thought you were because I'm really just chill like.
• 29:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm just chill.
• 29:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I had one guy that tried to go through my dad today and I was like, bro, that is the wrong route to take.
• 29:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: Like, I'm super, super private.
• 29:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: Like, I will date somebody and the church will know probably once I get really good married.
• 29:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: So who are you when nobody's watching them?
• 29:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: Who am I when nobody's watching?
• 29:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: I heard work I closed on Monday.
• 29:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, what is it like, who are you outside of having to run
• 30:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm just a, I like to have fun.
• 30:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: I like to watch people have fun.
• 30:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I like to create spaces where my friends can have fun.
• 30:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm not a big dancer, but I like to watch people have fun.
• 30:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've created a home in my space where my kids and their friends can come over, but I really am chill.
• 30:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: I am like, I don't think you understand what I'm saying?
• 30:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: Who am I?
• 30:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, what have you created for me?
• 30:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, throughout this conversation, I've heard about that.
• 30:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: I've heard about friends.
• 30:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: I've heard about them two boys which you sacrificed your whole life for.
• 30:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'll listen.
• 30:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I just got the last one, graduated from college.
• 30:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: So that's the time.
• 30:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's the time you light up.
• 30:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: But when I ask you, you're asking one live.
• 30:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: Right.
• 30:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's like this whole circle of question marks.
• 30:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, this is funny.
• 30:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: Well, because I do a lot of giving.
• 31:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I think, you know, I'm almost 50.
• 31:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm 48.
• 31:08
  [SPEAKER_05]: Come on, don't play with it, stay with it.
• 31:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: Black don't crack beige, don't eat.
• 31:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's happening like the back of your feet.
• 31:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 31:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's what you can do.
• 31:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, you know, they're almost the riser.
• 31:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's the only time I can tell if a black woman 48 or 30.
• 31:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, baby, I feel like do this right here.
• 31:24
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then they do that.
• 31:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then biscuit's still sitting up there.
• 31:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'll be like, yeah, baby, you don't walk some miles, honey.
• 31:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yes, you have.
• 31:33
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I'm almost 50.
• 31:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: You look great though.
• 31:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: Thank you.
• 31:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I'm really intentional about focusing on the parts of me.
• 31:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love what I do.
• 31:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love ministry.
• 31:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love my women's ministry and she rose leg and all of that.
• 31:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I don't.
• 31:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: I don't get upset at the work, but I do find at this place of my life that I do have to put a little bit more intentionality on the things that I wish it likes to do and what I want to do because I will prioritize everybody else before I prioritize me on some things, almost things.
• 32:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I think that's my heart of being a giver.
• 32:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: My heart is to see the people around me when.
• 32:23
  [SPEAKER_03]: My heart is to see
• 32:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: It's a drive and a focus of I want to see anybody connected to me when and I consider if you win I win, but there are these dreams and desires and and things that I want to do that on the back shelf that I'm now at a place of my life that I'm like, you can't keep sitting on it, that's not, he's not allowed to keep sitting on those.
• 32:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: I say it's 2021.
• 32:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's June.
• 32:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: I remember I'm sitting in my condo in mid-town Atlanta.
• 33:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 33:01
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I'm in a pool full of tears.
• 33:03
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I'm just like crying.
• 33:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: I can't stop crying.
• 33:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: 2020, I leave the mayor to home.
• 33:09
  [SPEAKER_05]: I lie to my children and say Daddy's gonna go rent a workspace which is actually my condo that I'm about to leave because I didn't know how to make this thing land with them because we have this happy little family on the outside.
• 33:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: But the truth is, it's chaos on the inside, and I remember sitting there and then social media goes crazy, of course, I have to be quiet.
• 33:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: My team is like, we don't say nothing.
• 33:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: There's 20,000 over there.
• 33:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's 400,000 times millions over here.
• 33:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: If you bring some light to it, it's over.
• 33:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: You know what I mean?
• 33:40
  [SPEAKER_05]: And so I'm like, okay, cool, no problem.
• 33:42
  [SPEAKER_05]: So I'm sitting there.
• 33:42
  [SPEAKER_05]: I feel like I have no voice.
• 33:45
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then this guy.
• 33:47
  [SPEAKER_05]: is dying on the internet so they pull me off the internet they run 12 months worth of rerun content luckily I got all this stuff So I don't really know what's going on online with the exception of when I see my dear sister Alice Prince and I can see her eyes and I was like hey Alice he's like what I said
• 34:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: pretty bad out there for you boy right now.
• 34:07
  [SPEAKER_05]: It seems like balls just stay off of air, right?
• 34:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: And so we kind of laugh and then we would joke about it.
• 34:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then finally, I get so angry because I feel like I'm in this bubble and I can't be who I am right now.
• 34:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like I can't be as free as I want to be.
• 34:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then...
• 34:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: I get mad, I'm like, God, what's up?
• 34:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, bro, like, I'm still serving you.
• 34:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, you got to calm this stuff down.
• 34:29
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, just the way I talk to God, I pray for him.
• 34:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I'm like, God, you got to calm this stuff down.
• 34:33
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then, and then, he poses this question.
• 34:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: He says, is that you, and I was like, is that me?
• 34:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm like, I'm asking you for answers and you ask them like they talking about me and people ain't calling the help and they ain't nobody coming to my rescue and they said, is that you?
• 34:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's been a year later.
• 34:53
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 34:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I fight with this question for a year and a half, it's like 2022.
• 34:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm moving to a whole another house and now my life is starting to recalibrate and things are starting to go good and I keep hearing my spirit, is this you?
• 35:09
  [SPEAKER_05]: I began to run because I liked the run and I was on my number three and I slowed down because I know one guy poses a question.
• 35:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: There's not a question for him to answer that he don't know the answer for.
• 35:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's for me to discover what that means and he said, is this you?
• 35:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm on the belt line, I get right over there by pot city market and Atlanta and I have to stop.
• 35:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: Tears start flowing and I said, that's not me.
• 35:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: is that you is not me, it's not me, that's not who I am.
• 35:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: So whatever I was, that's just not me.
• 35:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: You write God that's not me.
• 35:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: So then I downloaded the app and I put Instagram back on my phone, I put Facebook back on my phone and the same person that they made fun of, had things to say about, I laughed at him too, because he wanted to be seen.
• 35:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: He wanted to be known.
• 35:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: He was very selfish.
• 35:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: He was very prideful.
• 36:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: And so that person died, and I let him go.
• 36:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: And what I see in the body of Christ is that when we build these amazing mega structures of who we are, we have these great names across the earth.
• 36:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: And God is like, I'm attempting to share all this stuff for all of you.
• 36:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because I'm trying to build something else.
• 36:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: And so when I came back and realized, I
• 36:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: And they say, what do you like to do?
• 36:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: I've got like to work.
• 36:29
  [SPEAKER_05]: I like to take, so I'm building bridge here.
• 36:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: Man, I like to see all my team, good.
• 36:34
  [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah.
• 36:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because I'm from the neighborhood.
• 36:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, don't tell me you, don't tell me you granted if you're a pottenation.
• 36:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like you can't tell me you win and if you're potting over that struggling bro Like we don't roll that way bro Like you can't be the only one with the big chunk jury I still struggle with the Christianity knew me and the guy who's still getting excited about the numbers on the street I'm like choppy and I think you know I'm that guy right So I put I put back and then I literally had to go on the journey of discovery because if you ask me what I like I'm like I like I'm like on the work
• 37:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I was like, I don't like doing that now.
• 37:07
  [SPEAKER_05]: So I was like, well, I think I like cars.
• 37:09
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 37:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I think I, I think I'm like working now.
• 37:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then my therapist is like, let's write a list of things that you think you may like.
• 37:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I discovered I like comedy.
• 37:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I started going in the comedy clubs quietly.
• 37:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: No videos.
• 37:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: I was starting my comedy stuff like, hey, any I know Willie Mojoon you it'd be like three people in there.
• 37:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm like, put your phone down.
• 37:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: We probably gonna cut some little bit tonight.
• 37:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: I don't need that to go about everybody's gonna laugh.
• 37:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then, and then I'm gonna find that.
• 37:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I'm saying all that to be a bridge because at almost 50, like I'm like, baby, it's time because God is preserving this.
• 37:45
  [SPEAKER_05]: for this big thing, and these people that you've equipped, they gonna find a way to take care of life and all of that.
• 37:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: They will.
• 37:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: They got to.
• 37:54
  [SPEAKER_03]: And you know what?
• 37:55
  [SPEAKER_03]: Now, the more you talk, I'm like, you know, like you say, you love comedy.
• 37:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love food.
• 37:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: You like food, you cook?
• 38:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: No.
• 38:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: You don't cook.
• 38:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I am a foodie.
• 38:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: But you can find it.
• 38:04
  [SPEAKER_03]: You can make good reservations.
• 38:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: I can make a great observation.
• 38:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: Listen, if that's your requirement to talk to me, find somebody I don't cook at all.
• 38:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: Not even a little bit.
• 38:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: Not really.
• 38:17
  [SPEAKER_03]: What can you cook?
• 38:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: I can follow a recipe, but no, I could cook eggs.
• 38:24
  [SPEAKER_03]: I have two boys, I could cook, but I don't take pleasure in cooking.
• 38:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: By the time you finish cooking, you tie your good legs, or I'm thinking about all the other things I could have did in that.
• 38:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: And then you're not hungry.
• 38:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: I want to enjoy the food.
• 38:38
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I'm a foodie.
• 38:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm going to find a restaurant.
• 38:41
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love a good crude oil.
• 38:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love a good.
• 38:43
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, a restaurant
• 38:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: like going to do food.
• 38:48
  [SPEAKER_05]: What is Dr. Hill?
• 38:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: You're like, I love fashion.
• 38:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: You do.
• 38:53
  [SPEAKER_05]: Come on.
• 38:53
  [SPEAKER_05]: Put them to you.
• 38:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: Don't play with her.
• 38:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: She had three or four different outfits what she came in.
• 38:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love fashion.
• 39:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: So you like fashion?
• 39:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love fashion.
• 39:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: I think what you said though in adversity, you really discover who you are.
• 39:06
  [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah.
• 39:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: And God uses those at verse moments to show you yourself, what you think in like God show everybody else, he uses that moment to really show you the real you.
• 39:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I would flip that because not only do you find out that's not you, you find out too that you outlive what they say.
• 39:27
  [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah.
• 39:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I had to be anchored 2024, 2025, all kind of lies, all kind of things.
• 39:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: You outlive it, you outlive everything else so you outlive the negativity.
• 39:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: But it's in those moments where he does.
• 39:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: He wants to put the mirror up for you to see yourself.
• 39:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: And you start talking about your therapist.
• 39:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: That was the best decision I ever made.
• 39:49
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 39:49
  [SPEAKER_03]: Best decision I ever made.
• 39:51
  [SPEAKER_03]: 2024 life is starting to shake.
• 39:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: Family situations are happening.
• 39:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: Our family is popping up on social media.
• 40:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm finding out stuff when the world is finding out.
• 40:04
  [SPEAKER_03]: But before that, I had a moment.
• 40:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I was in my car and I called my best friend.
• 40:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I was like,
• 40:10
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, I was angry.
• 40:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was angry and I was like, I don't like this place.
• 40:15
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was like, I don't like this version of me.
• 40:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: I was like, I have to go to therapy and I've got to get some tools.
• 40:23
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I started going to therapy every other week.
• 40:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: best decision I made.
• 40:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: So do I love Jesus?
• 40:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: Absolutely.
• 40:29
  [SPEAKER_03]: But every other Friday, come on.
• 40:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: Me and my therapist, we're going to have a good conversation, a good conversation.
• 40:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: I still only tell.
• 40:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: And he and he gets the unfiltered.
• 40:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: He gets all the unfiltered version of how I feel that is my place of our live, but we also get the marching orders.
• 40:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: And in that, I have discovered more about me.
• 40:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I can say, no,
• 40:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: That doesn't work for me.
• 40:54
  [SPEAKER_03]: So like last year, my parents got back together, did a vow.
• 40:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: I threw them a vow renewal and then the next Sunday after I said, all right, I've done everything for you all.
• 41:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: I love y'all.
• 41:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: Now I'm going to focus on me.
• 41:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: And that has been really my journey.
• 41:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: What lie hurt you the most with through that, through that sea?
• 41:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like what, what did you discover that steel kind of?
• 41:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: Um, that I didn't honor both of my parents and I've honored both of them, I want to my mom and my dad.
• 41:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: I think that was one lie.
• 41:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: The one that's the hardest is because there's
• 41:57
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I think the other one was that people want to classify you as a failure.
• 42:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so you have to keep telling yourself, I haven't failed.
• 42:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: Like if I look at my resume, I haven't failed.
• 42:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: I navigated a pandemic.
• 42:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: No, no, first of all, I'm a female pastor, single, a mega church following a giant.
• 42:26
  [SPEAKER_03]: Nothing about that is failure.
• 42:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've raised two amazing boys.
• 42:32
  [SPEAKER_03]: Stop failure.
• 42:34
  [SPEAKER_03]: Has church changed?
• 42:38
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
• 42:39
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I navigate in my church through a season.
• 42:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I have to overcome this thing of you failed or you're failing because church doesn't look like what it looked like when my dad was the pastor.
• 42:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: You know, my dad was the pastor.
• 42:54
  [SPEAKER_03]: We, we number four on the largest churches in America.
• 42:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: And you know, I mean, it's, it's the thing.
• 43:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've also had my own successes,
• 43:09
  [SPEAKER_03]: one moment and classify you as a failure.
• 43:14
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so for me, that is the constant day by day.
• 43:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: You're not feeling, you're winning, you're winning.
• 43:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: Who speaks into your outside of your own voice?
• 43:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: I have some amazing friends of some amazing, I have some amazing friends and confidence that are just rock solid.
• 43:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: And to even be on my team, like, you know, you saw a couple of people on my team, you know, there are people that God has strategically dropped in my life in seasons.
• 43:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: So while, you know, my style is, people think, oh, it's just about the clothes.
• 43:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: There's a vulnerability and a transparency and I mean, you can't be that close to somebody that you don't see each other's transparency and vulnerability and then they're just some solid friends, one of my best friends, you know, her mom introduced us introduce me to her and her brother plays basketball.
• 44:15
  [SPEAKER_03]: And that has been a tremendous outlet for me.
• 44:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: You'll see us when he was playing UCS court side at a Miami heat game in a minute, that was a part of our recipe of enjoying life.
• 44:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: And yeah, so I have some great friends.
• 44:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, that Miami heat stadium is real quaint.
• 44:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's so quite like it's not being it is nice.
• 44:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, like right in there with the a little chef and there is bliss.
• 44:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: I took the boys in the club is nice.
• 44:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, all the downstairs was really cool.
• 44:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 44:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: They got a chance to do it.
• 44:47
  [SPEAKER_05]: But I do want to ask you this.
• 44:49
  [SPEAKER_05]: with this responsibility that you have and then the responsibility of now navigating getting the children off and then like all of this great entertainment stuff that I see in my heart in my head for you.
• 45:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like what you're gonna do with all that?
• 45:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like how we, like I just wanna know if we can maybe come up with like, you're gonna come up with a plan, like how do we, how do we navigate, like what would be the first step like leaving this conversation
• 45:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: Most people when they get finished, they've got to say too much about this that they do this.
• 45:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: But I think for you, it'll be like, man, I've really got a, what am I like, what would be the first step to get?
• 45:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: What I see over your head and this circle, that's like really huge.
• 45:33
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like it navigates from LA and it goes from near to, to like, there's like, in Rose and I like, like, how do we get that part?
• 45:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like, how do we go to that?
• 45:40
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like how do we make time for it?
• 45:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: We just gotta do it.
• 45:45
  [SPEAKER_05]: We just got to do it so it's like texting you four times a day and just like, hey, did you do it because I want to know Chris is who you're going to do me.
• 45:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, I bless you.
• 45:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: I book.
• 45:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, I promise you.
• 45:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: I bug you if I see if I see some purpose like it because I believe sometimes when I see it Selfishly just the part of that gift that I know that ain't really God.
• 46:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: I mean like
• 46:05
  [SPEAKER_03]: Cause she might got a role for me guy, you know, listen, you know, I may, you know, and I believe on calling favors, but the reason why I say you just got to do it, that's like, even this, you call me and you would like, hey, can you do this date?
• 46:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I immediately was like, I got something going on and then the Holy Spirit just checked me and was like,
• 46:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: Girl, what do you have going on that you cannot just go do it and I did you bad He started to get you back and I was like I'm coming.
• 46:36
  [SPEAKER_05]: You did and I'm so grateful because I meant you like an LA and Like you was right before Kobe.
• 46:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, Kobe came Kobe came So I'm on my phone after Kobe passed trying to find the picture in the video Cuz that's green like a little leaven you're all when he walked in because he came in
• 46:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: I was looking at like Kobe coming, Kobe coming, so I'm looking down like okay cool he gonna come that way, Kobe came from the screen.
• 47:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: I was like, oh, yeah, so that's where that's why I met you.
• 47:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then you know, I just kind of watched it and I remember when he became pastor like, you know, I like, I see, she pound past like you like, not just, yes,
• 47:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: Hey family, Willie Mojoon, you're here listening.
• 47:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: I had to interrupt this amazing interview to tell you about an opportunity that I believe is gonna be beneficial to you, your family and your destiny.
• 47:35
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's called the Flat Out Family.
• 47:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: Essentially to those of you who know what it is, it's a Patreon community where you'll get the opportunity to see episodes just like this a day early.
• 47:45
  [SPEAKER_05]: So you can go to the break room until everybody would it's about, before they start talking about it in the break room, right?
• 47:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then finally on Mondays, we have a financial segment.
• 47:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: that's going to help you with your finances because I want to take your money to the next level.
• 47:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: Tuesday, it's all about Jada, job opportunities for people like you who may have lost your job and there's some digital opportunity or you can probably make a quick 30,000 right from the house, huh?
• 48:07
  [SPEAKER_05]: On Wednesday, it's all about relationships and of course Thursday, it's about scholarships
• 48:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: money and making sure that our kids get the education that they need for his less money is possible and Friday.
• 48:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: I might just pop in there and do a live.
• 48:20
  [SPEAKER_05]: What I'm telling you is, you need to be a part of the flat out family.
• 48:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: Go to flatoutfamily.com or click the little link in this bio and yeah, be a part of the community.
• 48:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm gonna be in that one look close.
• 48:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: You see these little pants?
• 48:31
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm gonna wear them as much as possible in the Patreon flat out.
• 48:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: I think it's gonna be a really dope new beginning.
• 48:36
  [SPEAKER_05]: What's a submission look like for you in 2020?
• 48:38
  [SPEAKER_05]: submission?
• 48:40
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, kind of one of your statutes submit.
• 48:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like I know you have a submit to Father, but what a submission in the relationship looked like to you.
• 48:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, if you can tell me what to do, you can tell me what to do.
• 48:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: Just got to say that.
• 48:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: If you can tell me, I wish I could take the line from him, but if you can tell me what to do, what does that mean?
• 48:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: If you have, you can't tell me what to do if you don't have something of substance or value, and you just
• 49:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: a hypothesis or, you know, you just, well, I just, and you have nothing substantial to validate.
• 49:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: You just shooting in the dark.
• 49:18
  [SPEAKER_03]: But if you can tell me what to do, you can tell me what to do.
• 49:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: Like you telling me, you know, there's writing in you.
• 49:24
  [SPEAKER_03]: I know you pray for whoever comes on your set.
• 49:28
  [SPEAKER_03]: I know you've got experience.
• 49:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, we just watched the icebreaker with the, I mean, that's a whole scripted video shoot.
• 49:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: So you can tell me what to do.
• 49:38
  [SPEAKER_03]: So when Willie says, you need to get into screenwriting and I see writing and books in LA and entertainment.
• 49:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
• 49:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: My antennas up because you can tell me what to do.
• 49:47
  [SPEAKER_03]: Got it.
• 49:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: So if you can tell me what to do, you can tell me what to do.
• 49:52
  [SPEAKER_03]: And as great as I am in certain areas, I believe that God will connect you to the right people who have what you don't have.
• 50:00
  [SPEAKER_03]: That's that's partnership, that's covenant, that's that's union that I don't have at all.
• 50:08
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I can submit to the parts that you have that I don't have and I can submit with these.
• 50:14
  [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah.
• 50:15
  [SPEAKER_03]: I don't have a problem with submission.
• 50:16
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've grown up watching submission.
• 50:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've grown up watching honor.
• 50:24
  [SPEAKER_03]: But you can't tell me what to do if you don't know what you're talking about.
• 50:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: But if you know what you're talking about, and I believe you're sitting in my life, you can tell me what to do.
• 50:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I'll follow somebody.
• 50:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'll be honest with you.
• 50:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: So you have Dave Meyer who I had the opportunity to see from a distance because I work with Joyce Meyer, ministries and I watch Dave still strong man.
• 50:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 50:52
  [SPEAKER_05]: Like a lot of people think Dave, like Dave, Dave and Silent don't play with me.
• 50:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: Love golf, do a stand handling this business and I will watch like from a distance.
• 51:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: She would only come to Dream Center like
• 51:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: Maybe once twice a year, like she had a campus pastor.
• 51:08
  [SPEAKER_05]: And so, I would watch how Dave would just steward his wife.
• 51:15
  [SPEAKER_05]: And like some men have to be in that position.
• 51:17
  [SPEAKER_05]: So they may not necessarily have the answers for some of the bigger things, but they had the answers for you.
• 51:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 51:24
  [SPEAKER_05]: They were like, no, we're not doing that today.
• 51:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: Well, I want to, they walk in the office.
• 51:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: He's like, I don't play like that.
• 51:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 51:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: I got to ask you this though.
• 51:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I know we got to land y'all because I know the thing.
• 51:36
  [SPEAKER_05]: What was like the worst heartbreak for you and then how did you navigate like heartbreak?
• 51:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: So whether it's material in ministry, whether it's relationship, like, what was that thing that made you say, I'm gonna be on my pees and queues next time?
• 51:54
  [SPEAKER_03]: Ooh.
• 51:57
  [SPEAKER_03]: Relationship was because I'm really private.
• 52:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I dated somebody for like four years.
• 52:04
  [SPEAKER_03]: And I ain't told nobody.
• 52:07
  [SPEAKER_03]: My kids knew, but most people didn't know.
• 52:10
  [SPEAKER_03]: And at the end of the four years, that person said, I told you I really went meant for relationships.
• 52:17
  [SPEAKER_03]: I just want to be your friend.
• 52:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: After four years, I learned a valuable lesson in that, because my heart was broken.
• 52:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: because if I'm for you, I'm for you.
• 52:31
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm good to people that are connected to me.
• 52:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: That's just the nature of who I am.
• 52:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I was like, I just, I've sacrificed, I've been in this relationship.
• 52:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: And Laura, tell me, just because you sacrificed there doesn't mean your return on investment comes from that place.
• 52:49
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I learned that no time is wasted.
• 52:53
  [SPEAKER_03]: that I may have sown into that relationship.
• 52:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: I've sacrificed into that relationship, but he does not determine my return on investment.
• 53:03
  [SPEAKER_03]: That God would always give me a return on investment.
• 53:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: And because I sacrificed the return on investment had to come.
• 53:10
  [SPEAKER_05]: Being jazzed in a cello and dude, huh?
• 53:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: You didn't jazz me so much.
• 53:13
  [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, I'm not like that.
• 53:15
  [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, no, I'm not going to jail for nobody.
• 53:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Jazz me so much, he not do.
• 53:20
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I'm not busing nobody.
• 53:21
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm not even creeping up on you.
• 53:24
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm so chill that I don't need every day interaction.
• 53:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm aiming to talk to you on the phone every day.
• 53:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: So I wasn't gonna put it out there like this, but we had a look on the situation before time.
• 53:36
  [SPEAKER_05]: So what does a great relationship look like for Dr. Hillier?
• 53:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: We can hang out, we can have fun, we can do life, we can be married.
• 53:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yes, so it is something and marriage is something, but now you've brought it really for me and trouble.
• 53:55
  [SPEAKER_03]: I believe in marriage.
• 53:57
  [SPEAKER_03]: I don't.
• 53:57
  [SPEAKER_03]: We have a shared person love.
• 53:59
  [SPEAKER_03]: It fears him.
• 54:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
• 54:01
  [SPEAKER_03]: I believe in marriage.
• 54:02
  [SPEAKER_03]: But I don't like the confinement or construction of that marriage has to be this way for you to have a good marriage.
• 54:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: Sure.
• 54:12
  [SPEAKER_03]: So I could literally be married to somebody and we don't live together 24-7.
• 54:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: I know the science's going, get me for that, but I don't people commit to that.
• 54:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: It's commitment and if I'm committed to you, I was telling my kids, because we were having this conversation, I was like, a ring doesn't determine the commitment.
• 54:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: it's the heart's intent.
• 54:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: I said, so somebody putting a ring on my finger doesn't guarantee that they're going to uphold the commitment that they make to me.
• 54:44
  [SPEAKER_03]: It's the heart intent and the heart posture and the conviction that keeps them locked to me.
• 54:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: So, I could be married, but it won't look like what people think.
• 54:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: Because you're used to your space.
• 54:56
  [SPEAKER_03]: I'm used to my space, I don't expect them to come into my world because I believe that the person that got asked for me is a giant in their own right, is a king in their own right.
• 55:10
  [SPEAKER_03]: So they can't stop and become, I would smother the gifting on the inside of them to ask them to come and sit and be on the front row to appease the world.
• 55:22
  [SPEAKER_03]: to appease my church, and it would smother what God has called them to do.
• 55:27
  [SPEAKER_03]: So go do what God calls you to do, and we're going to always find our way back to each other, and we're going to stay connected, and we've got our commitment, and when it's time for us to come together, we come together, we have good time, we've got to eat, we do all that, and go back and do what you got to do, and then I'm going to go do what I got to do, but there's a connection that's not for people, but it's a connection for us.
• 55:49
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's good.
• 55:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: Terry Cruz, like his first person, like he has a condo, downtown Los Angeles.
• 55:56
  [SPEAKER_05]: That's where he does creative and his work.
• 55:58
  [SPEAKER_05]: His wife is totally okay if he has to stay there for a while to finish the idea if he has a role that he has to do and totally committed, totally faithful, no craziness, loves his family, where his ring just stand up guy and people
• 56:19
  [SPEAKER_03]: Newlight doesn't need a first man and Newlight's not gonna get a first man.
• 56:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: Newlight's first man.
• 56:25
  [SPEAKER_03]: Not happening.
• 56:26
  [SPEAKER_05]: You don't want to have a billboard on the highway with you with the big tie.
• 56:30
  [SPEAKER_05]: Absolutely.
• 56:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: And maybe not this cute make-up with the red blusher.
• 56:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: No, absolutely not my seat.
• 56:36
  [SPEAKER_03]: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
• 56:42
  [SPEAKER_03]: My sister and her husband, they've been married 24 years.
• 56:45
  [SPEAKER_03]: They run our marriage ministry.
• 56:46
  [SPEAKER_03]: They do an amazing job.
• 56:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: I watched them.
• 56:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, they do an amazing job, but that's not that's not what that's not what I desire and that's not what God is asking me to do.
• 56:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: And so I've navigated this space because who I marry is not for the church.
• 57:06
  [SPEAKER_03]: He's to make sure I'm good so that I can step into my role with a clear head, clear mind, and knowing I can fulfill my assignment.
• 57:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: Well, I'm going to tell you, I'm proud of you and I had a really good time hanging out with you too.
• 57:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: You listen.
• 57:21
  [SPEAKER_05]: I don't know if you're everybody cup of tea, but you my cup of coffee.
• 57:24
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm gonna let you know that, this is my type of thing.
• 57:27
  [SPEAKER_08]: Come on, that's my type, yeah.
• 57:29
  [SPEAKER_05]: So here's the thing, I want, I'm gonna come down there to the church and visit y'all and see you.
• 57:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: Here's the thing, you know I like to put a really cool bow on it.
• 57:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: Today it seems very, very light and cool.
• 57:40
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm finding my flow, I think we need to, I think we need about three, four more days of the shoot.
• 57:44
  [SPEAKER_05]: But let's put a bow, let's put a bow on this thing.
• 57:47
  [SPEAKER_05]: So I got an opportunity today to sit down.
• 57:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: What a young lady, we're so much.
• 57:53
  [SPEAKER_05]: Grace, favor, and just really like not really untapped potential, but just rediscovering the potential that God has for her outside of what the foundational call is.
• 58:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: Here's a thing, as an entrepreneur.
• 58:08
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm going to give you just a little bit of a systematic game that I have for everybody.
• 58:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: But it ain't to be played with, it's to be stay with.
• 58:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: Come on, somebody, I'm talking to my dad talk today.
• 58:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: But what I want you to do is I want you to discover what your trunk is, right?
• 58:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: So we're looking at a tree.
• 58:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: I want you to discover what your trunk is, your trunk is your foundation, that's where your roots go down.
• 58:29
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then I want to start putting branches on this thing, right?
• 58:32
  [SPEAKER_05]: So what I've seen in Doc is that she's built a really cool foundation, right?
• 58:37
  [SPEAKER_05]: A newer foundation is good, but now it's like, okay, what branches are we going to put on this thing?
• 58:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: It's for anybody who's stuck right now.
• 58:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: For me, for years music was my trunk and we had all of these roots and music music music and I started putting touring.
• 58:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: T-shirts, CDs back in the day, and I will build out this tree, and I will stay true to that.
• 58:57
  [SPEAKER_05]: And then in the middle of me thinking this thing about the blow of God said, okay cool, we're gonna pull up this tree.
• 59:02
  [SPEAKER_05]: You need to come over to a new foundation.
• 59:04
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I believe right now, many of you all are there.
• 59:06
  [SPEAKER_05]: Where you look at your life and you say, God, it gotta be more than this.
• 59:11
  [SPEAKER_05]: And here's the thing, I'm not talking about somebody who's just emotional because life is boring because the truth is, it is not what you think it is on social media, it's a lot of day in day out, eating the same thing, schedules, practices, et cetera, et cetera.
• 59:24
  [SPEAKER_05]: But I'm talking about those people right now just on the inside, you think it to yourself.
• 59:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: God, I feel that talk, but it's hard to like let this point go and then jump over this unarmed bridge to get to this other side because I don't know exactly where my resources are going to come from.
• 59:39
  [SPEAKER_05]: I don't know exactly who's going to support and law forbid the people that I may lose because of the opportunities that I'm going for.
• 59:46
  [SPEAKER_05]: If that's you, come on, put a number one in the chat, fill it with the usual number.
• 59:50
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm talking to you because I want you to find some comfort in the fact that those desires that you have on the inside of you didn't come from you.
• 59:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: They didn't come from you.
• 1:00:01
  [SPEAKER_05]: They have been strategically planted in you by a guy who knows the untapped gifting and resources that he has on the other side of you stepping out on faith.
• 1:00:12
  [SPEAKER_05]: And what does that look like?
• 1:00:13
  [SPEAKER_05]: You said, we're gonna do him, well, I'm just gonna quit my job and I'm about to start doing bacon.
• 1:00:17
  [SPEAKER_05]: No, I'm not telling you that.
• 1:00:19
  [SPEAKER_05]: Sometimes it's easier to step down before you step out.
• 1:00:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: And what a step down look like.
• 1:00:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: You start to delegate the task
• 1:00:29
  [SPEAKER_05]: You look at your check and you say if you make $100,000, you make $8,300, $33,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000, $3,000,
• 1:00:54
  [SPEAKER_05]: I plan on being at this level so I can fly at this level.
• 1:01:00
  [SPEAKER_05]: Right now, I mean, year two of this podcast, I gave it three years to be at a certain threshold.
• 1:01:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: I gave myself enough runway that I don't put so much pressure on my foundation that I end up breaking the tree.
• 1:01:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm smart enough to give some runway.
• 1:01:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: So now as I step out on faith, I got another tree over here that I already put it on.
• 1:01:22
  [SPEAKER_05]: Now I'm putting in branches on there.
• 1:01:23
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm bringing docking, I'm putting commercials on this thing.
• 1:01:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm telling everybody about it.
• 1:01:28
  [SPEAKER_05]: I'm getting partnership that didn't happen overnight, but it was some intentional time that I put in.
• 1:01:34
  [SPEAKER_05]: And I slowly step down from one place so I could step out in another place.
• 1:01:40
  [SPEAKER_05]: And to those of you that guys I just step on now, you know you being this obedient, just head on out there, I'm gonna catch you, come on somebody.
• 1:01:45
  [SPEAKER_05]: Michael Jackson, you remember that video when every time he step it lit up, that's what God gonna do for you.
• 1:01:51
  [SPEAKER_05]: But for others, that's just some strategy that I wanna give you.
• 1:01:55
  [SPEAKER_05]: Very practical that you can do and really go out there and win on purpose.
• 1:01:59
  [SPEAKER_05]: There's so much more purpose in you.
• 1:02:01
  [SPEAKER_05]: You don't have to be in the same place at the same time next year with this type of information.
• 1:02:08
  [SPEAKER_05]: you're gifted, you're smart, you're intelligent, you're a love, you're a care for your honor, you're trusted, you're faithful.
• 1:02:14
  [SPEAKER_05]: You're going to do some really, really great things.
• 1:02:16
  [SPEAKER_05]: I only have one request.
• 1:02:18
  [SPEAKER_05]: Then when you step out with this information babe, and you go out there and win, don't forget about your own nephew, William, or him.
• 1:02:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: I love you the life.
• 1:02:25
  [SPEAKER_05]: Don't forget to love yourself.
• 1:02:27
  [SPEAKER_05]: More.
• 1:02:30
  [SPEAKER_03]: and virtually tried to name you, but it doesn't get the final word.
• 1:02:35
  [SPEAKER_03]: You're not what you've been through.
• 1:02:37
  [SPEAKER_03]: You are what God bought you through.
• 1:02:40
  [SPEAKER_03]: Own your power because God has more for you.
• 1:02:43
  [SPEAKER_03]: So join me for she Rosalie conference 2026, April 29th through May 2nd, Houston, Texas.
• 1:02:50
  [SPEAKER_03]: Go register right now at sheRosalie.com.
• 1:02:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: Let love you more, love you more, love you more.