Latest / AI for Founders with Ryan Estes / IRL Events Are the New Moat

Transcript

IRL Events Are the New Moat · AI for Founders with Ryan Estes

• 0:00
  Are you still hiding? Behind your laptop, building in
• 0:02
  silence. Are you optimizing your funnels
• 0:04
  but avoiding people? Yeah, me too.
• 0:06
  But most founders don't have a product problem.
• 0:08
  They have a presence problem. We built a world where you can
• 0:11
  reach millions online and still feel completely invisible.
• 0:14
  But the founders that are pulling ahead right now, they're
• 0:17
  not louder, they're closer. They're putting 10 to 20 people
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  in a room and doing what no algorithm can making them feel
• 0:24
  seen. Maybe we stop thinking about
• 0:25
  events like logistics and start thinking about them like product
• 0:28
  designs. Who's in the room?
• 0:30
  Why are they there? What do they feel when they walk
• 0:33
  in? And who do they become when they
• 0:35
  leave? Because one perfectly curated
• 0:37
  room can outperform 10,000 impressions.
• 0:40
  Not awkward networking. Not grab a drink and mingle.
• 0:43
  You engineer moments. You create surprise, you create
• 0:47
  connection, you create memory. And suddenly you're not chasing
• 0:50
  opportunity anymore, it's walking right towards you.
• 0:53
  So the more we automate, the more valuable human energy
• 0:56
  becomes. So I'll ask you, are you
• 0:58
  building something that people scroll past or something they
• 1:01
  cross the city to experience? Welcome to AI for Founders.
• 1:05
  I'm Ryan Estes, and today you're going to learn how to turn
• 1:08
  events into a growth engine, how to design rooms that curate real
• 1:12
  outcomes, and why human connection is becoming the
• 1:15
  ultimate competitive advantage. This episode is for founders who
• 1:18
  are tired of being online and ready to become unforgettable in
• 1:22
  real life, featuring Virginia Frischkorn.
• 1:25
  And if you want ideas like this every week, go to
• 1:27
  aiforfounders.co. It's where founders go to think
• 1:30
  better, build smarter and move faster.
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• 2:19
  All right, Virginia, welcome to the show.
• 2:20
  Thanks for coming on. Thanks.
• 2:22
  Ryan, I'm so excited to be here. Yeah, absolutely.
• 2:26
  Now, Virginia's a personal friend of mine, I'm happy to
• 2:28
  say. And I wanted to have a
• 2:30
  conversation around events, largely because I've been
• 2:33
  struggling with events a little bit.
• 2:34
  I know their importance and I've been a little bit tentative.
• 2:38
  And Virginia's an absolute expert in this arena on multiple
• 2:41
  levels. Not only the the fabulously
• 2:43
  successful entrepreneur with partytrick.com, but also throws
• 2:48
  just like some of the coolest events here in Denver, which I
• 2:51
  get to sneak into, I should say. So I, I really want to have this
• 2:56
  conversation now. I want to give it a little bit
• 2:57
  of framework. Now, a good buddy of mine is
• 3:00
  possibly the world's leader in an AI platform for go to market.
• 3:06
  Basically, you can sign up there and there's all kinds of
• 3:08
  different agents you can use to help your product go to market.
• 3:11
  Now how is he going to market? He's doing events, so I, I love
• 3:15
  the friction and tension there. And the IT, it seems like it's a
• 3:19
  double sided coin where the further we get into technology,
• 3:23
  the more important in real life events become.
• 3:26
  So before we get into that, let's just set the stage a
• 3:30
  little bit about party trick. So kind of give us the overview
• 3:34
  of party trick, what it does and who it does it for.
• 3:37
  Definitely. So party trick is a platform
• 3:39
  that's almost like having a party planner in your pocket.
• 3:42
  It tells you what to do, when to do it, how to do it.
• 3:45
  Think of it as if you had that pro just in your pocket, tapping
• 3:48
  on the shoulder saying this is best practices.
• 3:50
  Here's how you're going to do all of these things to make
• 3:53
  smooth. We launched it for the everyday
• 3:54
  consumer and I fight with my engineers all the time.
• 3:57
  They're like, well, your user is an event planner.
• 4:00
  I'm like, no, my, my user is you.
• 4:02
  They don't throw events, right? So I call this person the secret
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  event planner, someone who gets tasked with hosting gatherings
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  personally or professionally. So it might be a kids birthday
• 4:12
  party, if it could be a networking event for work, it
• 4:15
  could be a trade show for work. So really the whole breadth of
• 4:19
  events, gathering two people or more, that's a celebration,
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  That's a gathering. It's a reason to use party
• 4:24
  trick. Incredible.
• 4:26
  Yeah. And you know, it's, it is such
• 4:28
  an important product because it can be a little bit
• 4:30
  overwhelming, at least speaking personally.
• 4:33
  So let's talk about kind of where we're at.
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  You know, we have people that are spinning up products, one
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  man teams raising 8 figures going forward, trying to do it
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  all alone, really taking the friction out of like everything
• 4:45
  is going to be very important. So when when founders are
• 4:48
  thinking about events, what might be some like important
• 4:51
  events they should consider or maybe even a better question,
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  they're doing a launch party, you know, how could they use
• 4:58
  party trick and what are some things maybe they should be
• 5:00
  aware of or considering? Yeah, I always go back to the
• 5:04
  why start everything with AY, why are we doing this sort of an
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  event? So if you're doing a launch
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  party, what's the purpose? Is the launch purpose to drive
• 5:12
  the eyeballs? Is it lead Gen.
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  Is it a splashy moment for a press release?
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  And I like to kind of encourage people to go back to that.
• 5:20
  Why always, if you do that, you're going to be set up for
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  success. If you know why you're going to
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  host an event, the odds of actually achieving the event
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  outcome that you want is that much higher.
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  So you know, I, I would say that varies, right?
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  So a launch party means many different things to many
• 5:35
  different people. And when you go on party trick,
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  you can find what we call event blueprints or event templates
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  and you then curate your gathering and from end to end,
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  how you're going to gather, where you're going to gather,
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  start curating that guest list with that intentionality in
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  mind. We don't kind of like thread the
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  intentionality between, but it is something that I message over
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  and over. If you go back to the why,
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  you're going to be set up for success.
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  So how you're curating the room really changes if you want
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  customers versus if you just want press or you know, we have
• 6:04
  a client that we're working with for an event on a service and
• 6:07
  software related side and she's launching an entire event
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  series. She has a pretty big podcast in
• 6:13
  the lifestyle dating space. And so this first event, she
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  wants to hit many different buckets of people.
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  She wants press, she wants other influencers, but she also wants
• 6:22
  to be taken seriously outside of that kind of creator world.
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  Not that there's anything there. It's just like she's got a very
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  traditional creator background. And so we approach her event
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  with intentionality of of the guest list and the experience
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  that they're going to have. I think a lot of people are
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  like, oh, let's just like throw people in a room and see what
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  happens. But the curation that actually
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  happens is easier now than ever, but more important now than ever
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  as well. Yeah, yeah.
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  And I can speak kind of anecdotally about my own
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  personal experience. It's like, you know, as kind of
• 6:53
  personal branding becomes more and more a differentiator
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  between products and tools and services, like who you are
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  really matters. And so a lot of what we do is
• 7:01
  trying to, you know, put our tentacles out into the world,
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  which honestly, you got to have like a pretty tough skin because
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  you're going to get a lot of rejection that way.
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  The, the appealing thing about events is it becomes almost like
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  magnetic. It brings the people you want to
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  you, you know, And so kind of like reverse engineering those
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  outcomes is like a lot of times can be very successful and you
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  see people do it very skillfully, But it, it, it's
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  also like a, a task that you get better with time.
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  You need the reps. Do you need the reps like
• 7:35
  anything else in life? For sure.
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  Yeah, and I, I got some great advice from you because I was
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  thinking I was like Virginia, I'm thinking I want to do a
• 7:43
  conference. I, I can see like a three day
• 7:45
  conference and I want it to be about technology and medicine.
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  And you know, what are the, what are the bleeding edges with
• 7:52
  peptides and psychedelics and all that.
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  And in my head, I can see myself there with the lanyard and
• 7:57
  there's some like purple lights over here.
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  And you're like, let's, let's scale it back a bit.
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  And it's starting with those little moments of success,
• 8:06
  something small, practicing and practicing.
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  You know, as you all hear, Ryan and I know each other personally
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  as well. I was telling him about a
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  situation with my son and my son was practicing and he's 11 for
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  perspective. And he was practicing a pitch
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  and apology that he had to do. So he was doing it in a couple
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  of safe spaces first before he had to do the big thing.
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  And I think it's really easy as adults who I go look, I'm, I
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  know what I'm doing. I can build this massive
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  company. I can just throw, it's a party
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  Now. What I've got to say is go back
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  to kind of the advice you'd give for a child.
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  Start really simple. Start with something basic.
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  Build your confidence up. I find that people at events
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  read the energy on the host and there is actually a pretty
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  prolific quote UN quote host who I've been to a handful of his
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  parties and his gatherings. I will tell you they're awkward.
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  They're weird because for a while in the beginning, he
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  couldn't figure out how to be a gracious host.
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  And so not only does the event like people will, people
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  remember how you make them feel, right?
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  It doesn't matter how amazing the fireworks were, how great
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  the food was. They remember how they feel
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  during that experience. So if by getting those reps, by
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  starting small, having those wins, you're able to build your
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  confidence as a host and be able to kind of practice the various
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  skills of the plan, of the design of the production.
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  They're all different things that pull upon us in different
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  ways, and that's the goal. I think a lot of times for me, I
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  want to have anyone who's using our platform feel confident that
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  they know that they've like crossed their T's out of their
• 9:35
  eyes. So if they're anxious about how
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  they might communicate with someone, at least they know that
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  they've gotten that kind of thing in that like, and then
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  they're ready to go. So yeah, start small.
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  Think about how people are going to feel and know that they're
• 9:48
  going to read the energy off of you.
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  So how can you, as the host or organizer, set yourself up for
• 9:54
  success? This episode is brought to you
• 9:57
  by a dangerous idea. It's called reading,
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  And let's build something category defining together.
• 12:12
  And ultimately that's going to be kind of having master your
• 12:15
  domain that the reps give you that presence.
• 12:19
  You know, I've got a little bit experience with that.
• 12:22
  You know, in a former life, I was a promoter and while I was a
• 12:26
  music director for a jazz club in Denver called Dazzle, I was
• 12:29
  the the founding music director there.
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  And so I, you know, I was doing 1314 shows a week, you know, and
• 12:36
  you, you start to get in the pocket and there was just one
• 12:38
  time, just a quick story, you know, where a band was planned
• 12:42
  future jazz project. Great.
• 12:44
  You know, young guys, I guess we were all young and they they did
• 12:47
  kind of like a, a jazz hip hop fusion kind of thing.
• 12:50
  Anyway, place is packed, great energy, great vibes and the
• 12:54
  power goes completely out. Power goes out and everyone kind
• 12:58
  of stands up and like they're they're like looking around and
• 13:01
  and dazzle at the time was like a hole in the wall, like it's
• 13:03
  like a closet. So it was pitch black except on
• 13:07
  the bar. Dazzler had like nice aura and
• 13:10
  it had all these like little, little candles, you know, and
• 13:12
  like the little candle jar or whatever.
• 13:15
  So and so everyone looks at me and like they're starting to
• 13:18
  leave and I just like picked up 1 and just like held it up above
• 13:21
  my head. And then everybody else did.
• 13:24
  And then the band started doing like this drum circle thing
• 13:26
  because, you know, everything else was electric but the drums.
• 13:29
  And it just turned into this like amazing party for the two
• 13:31
  hours. Lights come back on, but I, I
• 13:34
  could tell at that moment, like everybody turned and looked at
• 13:36
  me because I was by the door and I was like, oh man, we actually
• 13:39
  need the revenue from the rest of the night.
• 13:41
  So like I got to keep them around.
• 13:42
  So it's just like being cool, letting you know that I'm OK,
• 13:45
  they're OK. Everything worked out fine.
• 13:48
  I will say, I think that having kind of the plan dialed allows
• 13:51
  you to pivot in that moment, right.
• 13:53
  So you knew that everything essentially was taken care of
• 13:56
  and your job was putting out the fire or well, you know, using
• 13:59
  the fire to your benefit in that case to actually bring it to
• 14:02
  life. And so when I was planning prior
• 14:04
  to starting party Trick, I was in the live events production
• 14:07
  business for like 18 years. It is several $100 million of
• 14:10
  events, these kind of 500 thousand, $5,000,000 massive
• 14:14
  events as well as you know, smaller ones as well.
• 14:16
  And what I will say is if you were, if things were planned, if
• 14:20
  you're them taken care of, you're able to roll with the
• 14:23
  punches, you're able to roll with the things that go wrong.
• 14:25
  Because in anything live, whether it's music or
• 14:27
  entertainment or a party, something will go wrong.
• 14:30
  You can't control it all. And so how well you are like
• 14:34
  planned allows you to pivot and roll with the punches and just
• 14:37
  get creative and remember that. And this is me, I always help
• 14:40
  our clients. No one really knows what's
• 14:42
  supposed to happen besides you, the organizer.
• 14:45
  So if a banner doesn't show up, if swag doesn't show up, if
• 14:49
  something goes wrong, I mean, maybe that was planned.
• 14:52
  Maybe it was supposed to happen that way no one remembers.
• 14:54
  And so if you respond calmly, fully, collectively, like
• 14:57
  pretend that you're a duck, make like a duck with a water roll
• 14:59
  off your back, you're that much more inclined to honestly just
• 15:04
  trick everyone else in the room and let them have a good time.
• 15:06
  Like that's what it is all about.
• 15:08
  It doesn't really matter on those little details.
• 15:10
  Don't swim the details. 100%, you know, and you should expect
• 15:13
  probably 10 to 20% of like improvisation the day of the
• 15:17
  event because that's just life. But if you're getting into 40,
• 15:21
  fifty, 60% improvisation, it's going to start to look like
• 15:25
  Woodstock 99 or the fire festival or something.
• 15:29
  You know, where you're like, Oh my gosh, those guys are are
• 15:33
  actually criminally liable. OK, that's that's not good.
• 15:36
  So really the, the preparation on the front side is super
• 15:40
  important. Now you're kind of on the front
• 15:41
  lines of, of what kind of events people are doing, you know, and
• 15:45
  so like professionally, what are what are some successful events
• 15:48
  that you see kind of people organizing?
• 15:50
  You know, yeah, it's been really interesting to see a whole
• 15:53
  range. And this goes back to 20, oh
• 15:56
  gosh, 2010 roughly when I started in this space and people
• 16:00
  were doing things that were like a little bit more boring and
• 16:02
  cookie cutter. Social media wasn't a thing in
• 16:04
  the same way. And So what I, what I've seen is
• 16:06
  a lot of the evolution of standard party, standard
• 16:09
  cocktail party, standard boondoggles, which is all
• 16:11
  shifted and it's become much more experiential.
• 16:14
  And so it might be a financial institution who's doing a
• 16:17
  Wellness related event, right? It might be a technology company
• 16:20
  who is sponsoring A pickleball tournament or a paddle class,
• 16:25
  what have you. And So what we're seeing right
• 16:26
  now in particular is a lot of small intimate gatherings,
• 16:30
  typically with some sort of an activity or something
• 16:32
  experiential, Whether and even if it's something where it's
• 16:36
  like a panel conversation that then turns into a rave, There
• 16:40
  tends to be some component of all right, well, let's have like
• 16:44
  a live tattoo artist or let's have someone who's doing like
• 16:47
  face painting or what have you. And I know that sounds silly,
• 16:49
  but it really like we had an event that we powered recently
• 16:53
  that was all around needlepointing.
• 16:54
  It was for a wine company and it was very in New York City, young
• 16:59
  influenceri kind of girls. And it was very impactful highly
• 17:02
  for them, social media worthy. It was a brand building, but it
• 17:06
  gets people working with their hands.
• 17:07
  And what I find, and this is a slightly different type of
• 17:10
  event, when you get people out of their comfort zone and that's
• 17:14
  what more and more brands are doing.
• 17:16
  So put them into a sports related, give them breath work,
• 17:18
  give them a workout class, arts and crafts, a bouquet bar, their
• 17:22
  guard comes down a little bit. And the level of human
• 17:25
  interaction is that much greater.
• 17:28
  And it's easier to go talk to someone and actually connect
• 17:32
  when you can actually participate in activity with
• 17:34
  them versus, you know, meet someone at the bar.
• 17:38
  And especially with level of alcohol that's being consumed
• 17:42
  and being drastically like lower now than it was a handful of
• 17:45
  years ago, people's barriers potentially are higher.
• 17:49
  And so if you can create these experiences for activations,
• 17:54
  much more likely to kind of generate a good dynamic at the
• 17:57
  event and actually get people talking to one another, which is
• 18:00
  really the whole point of it, right?
• 18:01
  We don't want to go and actually just sit on our phones.
• 18:03
  We want to actually connect. It's going online to get
• 18:06
  offline. It's actually engaging.
• 18:07
  And I think people have a harder time with that.
• 18:09
  So setting them up for success, making sure your guests are set
• 18:13
  to easily communicate with others around is really
• 18:15
  important. Yeah, it's interesting, you
• 18:18
  know, the the correlate of like people not drinking as much is
• 18:22
  interesting. You know, I I really think that
• 18:24
  like we're tribal creatures and status in the tribe is very
• 18:30
  important. And maybe for the first time,
• 18:33
  we're starting to see like physical fitness, which has
• 18:35
  always been very important, kind of reaching to the top of the
• 18:39
  hierarchy of importance within the tribe.
• 18:42
  You know, I think maybe the the seat it's dethroning is like
• 18:46
  intellectual kind of superiority.
• 18:48
  But now with AI, we're all kind of like, yeah, man, whatever I
• 18:51
  looked at up on Claude. But but more and more like, you
• 18:56
  know, I mean, especially here in Colorado, it's like you see
• 18:59
  absolute specimens everywhere you go of people that are
• 19:02
  absolutely shredded. And that is admirable.
• 19:05
  So, you know, maybe that contributes to people drinking
• 19:07
  less now. So if you're organizing an event
• 19:09
  where that might be kind of challenging is, boy, alcohol
• 19:12
  works, you know, to kind of break the ice, it's fantastic.
• 19:16
  But to actually get people to the event, maybe you need
• 19:19
  something more novel. Maybe it's around, you know,
• 19:22
  something with fitness. So you mentioned breath work
• 19:24
  with I, which I think would really be interesting.
• 19:27
  But you know, millennials, it seems like really kind of want
• 19:29
  to relive. They're like childhood birthday
• 19:31
  parties. You could probably do like pin
• 19:32
  the tail on the donkey and you'd get 1000 people to show up.
• 19:35
  I love that. Yes, you could, you know, it's
• 19:38
  funny, it's this whole like Revive and my my partner's about
• 19:42
  10 years older than I am. It's so funny because I'm very
• 19:45
  much in like the millennial zone and the whole vision boarding
• 19:48
  thing and intention setting is so big along like all my
• 19:51
  girlfriends and that's very popular with events these days.
• 19:54
  He's like, I just don't understand this.
• 19:56
  And so it's interesting to see the things that were popular
• 19:59
  when we were a little bit younger, but we're just
• 20:01
  generationally different enough that works exceptionally well,
• 20:04
  works well with Gen. Z.
• 20:05
  And truly, again, it's like, how can you bring in that nostalgia?
• 20:09
  We have an event that we're powering and it's a big panel.
• 20:12
  It's kind of a very like in goop health kind of vibes.
• 20:16
  What it's all around death that's coming up and caretaking.
• 20:20
  And we're pulling in this entire like nostalgia theme.
• 20:23
  And we've got like cute little lunch bags that look like what
• 20:26
  we would have at lunch when we were kids and these cars.
• 20:28
  And again, the target here is for like 35 to 50 year olds who
• 20:33
  are kind of moving into this position, but it's it's pulling
• 20:35
  upon those threads of nostalgia. But then if you think about
• 20:39
  this, and this is just about how to curate events with more
• 20:42
  intentionality. This is a somber topic, right?
• 20:46
  No one wants to go and actually talk about death and caretaking,
• 20:49
  right? But in this capacity, what's
• 20:51
  happening is there's a lot of pampering.
• 20:53
  And so we'll have like little hand and foot massages and
• 20:55
  beautiful skin care products and split, you know, things that
• 21:00
  would actually take care of someone versus it just being the
• 21:02
  information shoved at them. So they actually feel well taken
• 21:05
  care of. I think people really need to
• 21:07
  feel taken care of, but want that into nostalgia.
• 21:10
  So there's a funny kind of component of how do you get them
• 21:12
  activating, but also how do you how do you thread in that
• 21:15
  nostalgia in various ways? Because it's it's certainly
• 21:18
  there. It's certainly a trend right
• 21:19
  now. Yeah, that's interesting to
• 21:21
  consider kind of how to balance the subject matter.
• 21:24
  If it's very heavy, do something very light.
• 21:26
  If it's very light, maybe do something opposite.
• 21:29
  You know, that that jazz club I was at, you know, I learned a
• 21:32
  lot from the owner. And one of one of his things
• 21:35
  that was, was really important was you, you have to take care
• 21:38
  of all 5 senses. You know, it has to, you have to
• 21:41
  smell those, those fresh baked brownies when you walk in
• 21:44
  because you'll be in love. You want the music to be good
• 21:47
  visually. It needs to be stimulating a
• 21:48
  novel, you know, all of these, these things, tactile elements,
• 21:52
  you know, which I think goes into like being a good host, you
• 21:55
  know? Guest comfort.
• 21:57
  It's, I actually was just speaking with our engineers
• 21:58
  about this the other day and actually a designer
• 22:01
  specifically, he's like, well, let's touch event design later.
• 22:04
  And I'm like, well, event design's actually like a very
• 22:06
  holistic experience of, and I talked exactly about the same
• 22:10
  thing. There were we used to scent all
• 22:12
  of our walkways with some of these events.
• 22:14
  So we'd like scatter lavender or have incense.
• 22:16
  We always made sure to have comfortable like flip flops for
• 22:20
  people late night dancing or pashminas if we knew it was
• 22:23
  going to be chilly because now you can't do that in every case.
• 22:26
  Like budget may not allow it, but how are you thinking about
• 22:30
  the event? I've gone to plenty of events
• 22:32
  hosted by like law firms or financial institutions.
• 22:35
  You go into some disgusting breakfast and it's too hot and
• 22:39
  the food is like, I'm sure the food's good, but it looks so bad
• 22:43
  that you don't want to eat it. And so it's one of those things
• 22:47
  that how can you think about design in a very different, like
• 22:50
  just drop the temperature of the room.
• 22:52
  And especially, I'm sure you knew this really well in a jazz
• 22:54
  club, you're about to go and put a ton of bodies into a space
• 22:56
  that's going to heat up. So, you know, a few hours before
• 23:00
  drop the temp and how do you kind of pay attention to those
• 23:03
  things, especially when you as even organizer, your nerves are
• 23:06
  higher probably. So you're feeling warm and
• 23:09
  you're running around where most people are sitting.
• 23:10
  It's kind of good to have those touch points of how are people
• 23:13
  going to feel like from a sensory capacity?
• 23:16
  Is it hot? Is it cold?
• 23:17
  Do they know where the restroom is?
• 23:18
  Do they have access to just water?
• 23:21
  People forget about that frequently.
• 23:23
  Yeah, 100%. And these are great ideas of
• 23:26
  what to do and I, I love hearing about it because mostly I've
• 23:30
  been experienced. I've experienced, you know, what
• 23:32
  not to do, you know, when, you know, maybe a year ago or so and
• 23:36
  I was like, you know, it's important for me to go out
• 23:37
  there. I've been in this cave forever
• 23:39
  and maybe a lot of people can relate to that.
• 23:41
  We're still kind of like coming out of our cocoon from 2020, you
• 23:45
  know? So you know, you start going to
• 23:47
  these meetups like, oh, OK, meetup.com, let's go check that
• 23:50
  out. And they all kind of have a
• 23:52
  similar undesirable feeling. It's like, OK, we have name tags
• 23:57
  and we're just walking up to people being like, hi, what do
• 24:00
  you do? And you go to the cooler, you
• 24:02
  get a White Claw. You know, if it's me, I end up
• 24:04
  by the cooler. I talked to one person the whole
• 24:07
  time about, you know, the Roman Empire or something else.
• 24:10
  I'm like, well, I met that guy, so I'm out.
• 24:14
  What are? What are some other things that
• 24:15
  you should not be doing? Well, you know, I wouldn't say
• 24:19
  sometimes I actually do think going in with two to three
• 24:22
  people versus an entire room. I have actually found a friend
• 24:25
  in Denver who comes to a lot of the parties that I host there.
• 24:28
  And she walks in and the first thing she says to me when she
• 24:30
  comes in is, well, first, thank you so much for having me.
• 24:33
  And then she says, who should I meet in the room today?
• 24:36
  And I do make a very different approach with these events,
• 24:38
  which I'll share in just a moment.
• 24:40
  But I asked her, well, what are you hoping to achieve?
• 24:43
  Like do you want a new girlfriend?
• 24:44
  Are you looking for someone to help fund your business?
• 24:46
  Are you looking for your prospective client?
• 24:48
  And then she's able to say, or are you just wanting a fun time?
• 24:52
  Do you just want to meet a ton of people?
• 24:54
  So in your case, Ryan, where you say, hey, I go and I talk to one
• 24:56
  person. I think we can fall into that
• 24:58
  trap as a guest where you go in because that's a comfort zone,
• 25:02
  but the intentionality when you're showing up to these
• 25:04
  events is also as equally as important as those who are
• 25:08
  hosting. So if you're listening to this
• 25:10
  and you're going to a lot of events, think about like, why am
• 25:12
  I going to them and how do I navigate the social dynamics?
• 25:17
  I don't know. There are plenty of parties I've
• 25:18
  gone to and I was like, oh, I want to go and target XY and Z
• 25:21
  people and not in a like predatory way, of course, but
• 25:26
  and I've also gone to others and like, I just want to have a fun
• 25:27
  time. Like with some of my friends.
• 25:30
  The approach is a little bit different in terms of how you
• 25:32
  go. And I will say to just kind of
• 25:36
  like circle back to the moment when I host, one of the things
• 25:40
  that I try to do and I encourage others is to really curate the
• 25:44
  guest list carefully. And I take a an unfortunate that
• 25:49
  feels like it's actually a lack of curation.
• 25:51
  I cast a really wide net with different people.
• 25:54
  Sometimes I'll host like a girls night that is like the same
• 25:56
  group of girls over and over and it'll tell you like, that's
• 25:58
  fine. It's comforting.
• 26:00
  But a lot of times when I host, I bring together people who are
• 26:04
  at the start of their career, the end of their career in tech
• 26:07
  and finance, homemakers, my my neighbors.
• 26:11
  And what I find is that sparked some really interesting dialogue
• 26:14
  because we tend to gravitate to other people like ourselves,
• 26:17
  right? And so from a social
• 26:18
  perspective, it's someone who's in a similar career or we maybe
• 26:22
  went to school together. And so getting people out of the
• 26:24
  mold actually sparks some like discomfort, which I find to be a
• 26:30
  good thing because it creates A meaningful impact sometimes.
• 26:33
  So it's just another kind of like snippet of what to do when
• 26:36
  you're curating that list. Don't just go to your old
• 26:39
  standards. Think about how do I curate this
• 26:42
  in a way that like someone might meet someone who that they don't
• 26:45
  know or how can they carry it where, you know, someone strikes
• 26:49
  up some deal that they wouldn't have otherwise.
• 26:52
  Or it's, I want to take one group and make it a really
• 26:54
  cohesive gathering that is repetitive because a lot of
• 26:58
  great things like community is filled with repetition.
• 27:01
  So if it's a community building event, OK, cool.
• 27:03
  You need to get repetition. You need to have a core group of
• 27:05
  people, 60% who come over and over and over that starts to
• 27:09
  create community. So it goes back to that kind of
• 27:11
  like how to build it is based on kind of the intentionality of
• 27:14
  why you're actually hosting. Yeah, that's something I
• 27:17
  actually really admire about you because you're a hub.
• 27:21
  So if I come over to one of your events, you'll just kind of be
• 27:25
  over and be like, hey, Ryan, you should go talk to Steve and I'm
• 27:27
  like say less, you know, and then go do it.
• 27:30
  So like you're already kind of like by being selective, you
• 27:32
  already have certain relationships, you know, and be
• 27:36
  fruitful potentially, you know, and, and ultimately, if I'm
• 27:39
  thinking about an agenda when I'm going to a party, that's one
• 27:43
  thing I've never considered. And what happens with me is I I
• 27:46
  love people and I like parties and I love events like that.
• 27:49
  So I started getting tippy tap and I'm excited.
• 27:51
  And then, you know, I I tend to monologue and everything my
• 27:54
  thing, but being a little bit more selective.
• 27:56
  But ultimately I'd be I'd like to be a little bit more like
• 27:59
  Virginia, which is like I want to be a hub where, you know, for
• 28:03
  one, podcasting. It's like I'm just I'm podcast
• 28:05
  guy. You have any questions about
• 28:07
  anything on that? I have everybody you need to
• 28:09
  talk to. No worries, you know, so people
• 28:11
  can kind of remember podcasts guy, as opposed to whatever 10
• 28:14
  projects I got operating, you know it.
• 28:17
  And so that might be an agenda of organizing event where you're
• 28:21
  like, I'm here basically for the benevolence of everybody else is
• 28:24
  here making sure that that, you know, the little cliques don't
• 28:27
  form, which they will, which is fine, but like breaking it up a
• 28:30
  little bit, making sure people are mixing up and the people you
• 28:33
  know, might have some potential like connections can make that
• 28:36
  happen. So one of the things, and I'm
• 28:38
  originally from the Southeast, but not Deep South, and I'm
• 28:42
  going to bring that up specifically because in the Deep
• 28:44
  South and in Texas, they say that you're giving a party, not
• 28:47
  that you're throwing a party, having a party, but that you're
• 28:50
  giving a party. I mean, giving a party, giving
• 28:52
  an experience, giving an event is truly a gift to the other
• 28:56
  people. And if you kind of look at it in
• 28:57
  that light, yes, ultimately, if you're doing this from a
• 29:01
  business perspective, which the majority of events, I do have
• 29:04
  that realm and kind of lens, if you approach it with how can I
• 29:08
  help others, it ultimately always comes back to help you,
• 29:11
  right? But it's a gift, It's an
• 29:13
  experience that you're giving. And so how do you kind of again,
• 29:16
  curate the, the experience, curate the guest list to with,
• 29:19
  with others front and foremost. And I, I say this in a really
• 29:22
  weird way because like we're working on a trade show and
• 29:25
  Aspen food and wine Classic, where I want to connect with a
• 29:28
  lot of other beverage brands, right?
• 29:30
  Because that's a segment that we work with and we actually help
• 29:34
  with them with all their like field marketing and their brand
• 29:35
  marketing style events. So powering trade shows as part
• 29:38
  of. So how do you curate a guest
• 29:40
  list at a trade show? You can't, right?
• 29:43
  A lot of founders here like if you're going to these trade
• 29:45
  shows or you want to exhibit at one there those are that's an
• 29:48
  event and it's a really beneficial thing for you to do.
• 29:50
  Well, you can think about how people are going to remember
• 29:53
  you, what the take away is going to be, how you make them feel
• 29:55
  when you come up to it and do something that shocks.
• 29:57
  And Oz, we used to do this like surprise and delight moment.
• 30:01
  That is always how do you surprise and delight someone by
• 30:04
  either sending them home with something, shocking them with a
• 30:06
  different like way, an icebreaker that they might not
• 30:09
  have before. There's moments of elevation or
• 30:13
  depression for that matter. That's what people remember.
• 30:15
  There's a really great book called The Power of Moments, and
• 30:18
  it really talks about how to craft moments.
• 30:20
  And this is not around events. It's actually around like hiring
• 30:23
  or death or just like life, Little moments.
• 30:26
  You remember those, the starts, the ends, the peaks and the
• 30:28
  pits. And I think about that a lot.
• 30:31
  Just in life in general, how do you craft these moments?
• 30:34
  And you can craft moments at something as simple as a trade
• 30:36
  show in a much more impactful way.
• 30:39
  Like even just a, you know, 6 by 38 inch booth, like what you
• 30:42
  would normally have, not like a large, large activation.
• 30:45
  You can still have meaningful impact and shock people, which
• 30:48
  it's just a game. It's a game to play.
• 30:52
  Love that. I love that.
• 30:54
  So you're delight, shock, awe. Like what?
• 30:58
  The the feeling you're trying to elicit is like joy or like
• 31:01
  surprise. Joy or surprise?
• 31:03
  Yeah. So this is silly.
• 31:06
  This was actually more of a social event, but we found out
• 31:08
  that our client loved, like, mini gnomes, like garden gnomes.
• 31:13
  So we had gnomes all over like in the bathroom, in flower
• 31:16
  arrangements, on the bar, underneath cocktail napkins.
• 31:20
  And I don't know if you've ever been to a party and found a mini
• 31:22
  garden home in the bathroom, but it definitely leaves an impact
• 31:26
  kind of weird and funny. We did for a trade show event a
• 31:30
  couple of examples that are tangible.
• 31:32
  We we pulled a key party theme, which the hope of people know
• 31:36
  what that is, but we had this funny little where people pulled
• 31:39
  like a card to take home and we had tied like a little key on it
• 31:42
  and you like went into the fish bowl and grabbed the key out and
• 31:45
  it was this funny. I mean, the remarks that we got
• 31:49
  were hilarious. Going back to the nostalgia, we
• 31:52
  pulled on some nostalgic like swag.
• 31:53
  We had magic 8 balls for a trade show at one point.
• 31:57
  People, I mean, they were, we had people flooding our booth to
• 32:00
  go get that piece of swag because it's not the like, oh,
• 32:03
  here's a tote bag. So that was a surprise and
• 32:05
  delight of oh, I remember that. I used to do that all the time.
• 32:09
  So it can be simple with an experience, it can be a take
• 32:12
  away. Those are things that have a lot
• 32:14
  more impact and not an necessarily an immediate impact,
• 32:18
  but with repetition it becomes very significant.
• 32:24
  Yeah, and that's that's like the, that's human flourishing
• 32:27
  ultimately. You know, it's like a little bit
• 32:29
  of fun, a little flirtatious. It's like a little bit it's it's
• 32:33
  demonstrating superior health and fitness.
• 32:37
  I mean, superior makes it feel like a hierarchy.
• 32:38
  I don't mean like that, but it means that you have the capacity
• 32:41
  to like do well. And, and maybe that's just kind
• 32:44
  of like a, a, a broader topic about where we are culturally.
• 32:48
  You know, the, I think the whole lockdown thing was so
• 32:50
  traumatizing in so many ways that, you know, it might take
• 32:54
  7-8 years for us to kind of pile out of it.
• 32:56
  So we kind of came through. I'm just kind of like speaking
• 32:59
  broadly here, but like a, a time when people were really
• 33:03
  wrestling with stress, anxiety, depression, like everyone has
• 33:09
  ADHD. We have all these things that
• 33:11
  culturally we've been wrestling with.
• 33:13
  And if you look at like kind of positive psychology, which I,
• 33:17
  I'm a student of and I really like, but they'll just kind of
• 33:19
  tell you right from the get go that like, Hey, you can't even
• 33:22
  really reach this kind of like this kind of instruction or this
• 33:26
  kind of learning until all of your pathology has been kind of
• 33:29
  worked out. So, you know, collectively it
• 33:31
  feels like we've been working on that pathology a lot, but a lot
• 33:35
  of folks now are like, kind of coming out be like, OK, you know
• 33:38
  what? I've got my stuff under control.
• 33:39
  I'm running in the morning, I'm my diets together.
• 33:42
  I feel pretty good now. What?
• 33:44
  And you, I see symptoms of this all over the place.
• 33:46
  You know, the two places I am most online, I hate to admit it,
• 33:50
  are probably like TikTok and Reddit.
• 33:52
  And on TikTok there's just I don't know why they serve me
• 33:56
  these, but it's like all these women being like, why is it so
• 33:58
  hard to find a date? Or on Reddit, it's everybody
• 34:02
  saying like in sub our our Denver like why is it so hard to
• 34:05
  make friends? Where do I go to make friends?
• 34:07
  What should I do to make friends?
• 34:09
  And it, it seems like there's kind of a longing right now for
• 34:12
  this, this personal connection. Do you kind of see the same
• 34:14
  thing? Oh, like all over the place.
• 34:17
  I same thing. My social media feed is flooded
• 34:20
  with it, which I love. I screenshot it left, right and
• 34:22
  center and send it to my team. I'm like, see, This is why we're
• 34:25
  doing this. This is like it's incredibly
• 34:27
  validating from a professional perspective about why we're
• 34:30
  building what we're building now.
• 34:32
  But it is it's I was a psychology student in college
• 34:35
  and this is something that I personally like have continued
• 34:37
  to study and a non-stop. And we part of the reason we
• 34:42
  started party trek was I, you know, come 2020, I actually had
• 34:46
  a large event the day of the shutdown and I had my live event
• 34:49
  production company. I couldn't go to execute and to
• 34:53
  produce this event. And you know, a month later, we
• 34:56
  didn't know when we were going to be doing events.
• 34:57
  I had to lift and shift almost 1000 events at that time across
• 35:01
  the summer. It was horrible.
• 35:03
  And I kept my whole team on, but I was like, look, we have the
• 35:05
  tools and infrastructure to basically empower like anyone to
• 35:09
  do events anytime. And it really started with
• 35:11
  hosting at home because, you know, COVID really punctuated
• 35:15
  gatherings and necessity. It's not a luxury.
• 35:17
  People need it. And now people are talking about
• 35:20
  it. I think in the beginning they're
• 35:21
  like, I'm fine, I can do this. I'm going to do like a Zoom
• 35:23
  date. No, people need to be together.
• 35:26
  Like belonging is a core need and get getting together and
• 35:30
  gathering. And now, now it's so common and
• 35:33
  so mainstream. And I think again, from a
• 35:35
  professional and personal perspective, how we gather is,
• 35:39
  is going to really dictate how we move forward.
• 35:41
  And you know, with all the tools, with all the apps that
• 35:44
  are popping up, we can work more effectively, work more
• 35:47
  efficiently. We can target our guest list and
• 35:49
  do our research more. But hopefully you can then take
• 35:53
  that time saved or the access that you wouldn't have had prior
• 35:57
  and actually disconnect and go out and actually create these in
• 36:00
  real life experiences because we say we need it, but now it's
• 36:02
  time to actually action that. And I mean, events are up, but
• 36:05
  it is, it's a, it's a challenge to get offline and go and
• 36:09
  actually because people are craving it, they need it. 100%,
• 36:13
  yeah. And if everybody's craving it,
• 36:15
  there's 100 people that are like, I want to do more and
• 36:17
  you're the one person that's like, I'm going to do it.
• 36:20
  Then again, that's that's getting you kind of like the
• 36:23
  place you want to be, which is like attracting them to you and
• 36:26
  being, at least in my case, the person that can make other
• 36:29
  connections. Because like, maybe that's just
• 36:31
  the, the, the delight you need. It is like, wow, man, that was
• 36:34
  great. I know I wanted to do it until
• 36:37
  the hour before where I was like, should I bail out?
• 36:39
  But no, I showed up and it was awesome for XYZ reasons, you
• 36:43
  know, which I I think is like, it's, it's kind of like a
• 36:46
  monster hack that really I'm seeing just the best of the best
• 36:50
  are doing, you know? Yeah, You know, it's
• 36:52
  interesting. I think every time before I host
• 36:54
  personally or for my business, I'm like, oh God, why did I just
• 36:58
  like to do this? I'm tired, I'm stressed.
• 37:00
  I want to go to bed. People are going to stay too
• 37:02
  late. And I do.
• 37:03
  I regret it. And then, you know, I catch
• 37:06
  myself 30 minutes into that and I'm like, I'm so energized and
• 37:09
  I'm so jazzed and I'm an, I'm an extroverted introvert.
• 37:12
  So I, I toggle this line where like it then takes, it does take
• 37:15
  a ton out of me, but it does bring so much life and it brings
• 37:18
  so much passion. So it's just kind of like, how
• 37:20
  do you get over that hump? And for many people stuck behind
• 37:23
  our screens all day, if this is where we're comfortable and
• 37:25
  we're not comfortable in front of, you know, 30 people in your
• 37:29
  home or 1000 people at a trade show, how can you partner with
• 37:32
  others to kind of get over it, right?
• 37:35
  So how do you leverage Co hosting things, things together?
• 37:38
  How do we collaborate? And I think collaborative events
• 37:41
  are on the rise tremendously right now getting 3 or 4 brands
• 37:44
  together. It allows you to list share.
• 37:47
  So if you have that anxiety of wait, can I fill the room, you
• 37:50
  can leverage the list of other people.
• 37:52
  And that's something that kind of that's a common fear or can I
• 37:55
  host this? Can I bring it all together?
• 37:57
  You can divide and conquer. And so that's something that is
• 38:00
  really, I think because it's much more common now than it
• 38:05
  ever has been before. It's something I encourage
• 38:08
  people to think about like you are not on your own.
• 38:10
  One, you've got amazing tools out there that are like a party
• 38:12
  played in your pocket, but you also have great brands and great
• 38:15
  other people who can collaborate and get creative together.
• 38:18
  And and in that like, it creates even a more magical experience.
• 38:22
  It's huge and it, it draws like minded people together.
• 38:26
  You know, if you stand up, you're like, hey, I want to do
• 38:28
  this and three other people like I want to do that too.
• 38:30
  You're like, OK, great. What do we got?
• 38:31
  You know, it's, it provides novelty into your, into your
• 38:34
  life, which again, like this is how you promote human
• 38:37
  flourishing. It's it we may have a swarm of
• 38:39
  seven AI agents that deliver us a detailed report at 7:00 AM
• 38:43
  every single day like clockwork, but it's like, I think it's
• 38:46
  boring, you know what I mean? Like I want, I want mystique and
• 38:49
  I want like spontaneity and I want cool things to happen.
• 38:53
  And it only happens if you make it happen.
• 38:56
  Yeah. And I do think again, it's like
• 38:59
  you've got to make it happen or rely on friends and then start
• 39:02
  going to things, then start hosting them.
• 39:05
  Start small. Like we said at the beginning,
• 39:07
  those reps really allow people to kind of like ramp it up and
• 39:10
  then use your tools that you've built to keep it alive pre,
• 39:13
  during, in post. And I think that's where a lot
• 39:15
  of people look at events like we want that in person connection.
• 39:17
  We want something that's memorable and even those who
• 39:20
  can't come, Ryan knows this 'cause he gets my emails on
• 39:23
  this. But like when I'm hosting, I
• 39:25
  always like after the fact, we'll send a thank you.
• 39:28
  I'll offer to connect people afterwards.
• 39:30
  I try to send something. I hope he's gotten these where
• 39:34
  like, hey, here's the playlist from an event or here's like a
• 39:36
  value add. And so when I think about things
• 39:39
  that we've done professionally as well there just as a take
• 39:41
  home, like have that great experience, but send the
• 39:44
  follow-ups. You can craft them.
• 39:46
  We help send them out as well where it's like, hey here,
• 39:49
  where's the playlist? Here's something that like
• 39:51
  drives value to others and reminds them and impacts them
• 39:53
  about that experience. So if people can't be there one,
• 39:57
  they get a taste of it and then now they want to come to the
• 39:59
  next one or two. If they have been, you've been
• 40:01
  able to prolong an experience or help them relive a memory
• 40:04
  because again, just even closing your eyes and reliving a great
• 40:08
  memory, you can trick your body, right?
• 40:11
  I mean, Ryan, you know all about this in this way, but like you
• 40:13
  can, it's like. Visualize those experiences pre,
• 40:16
  during and post and how can you trick your guess to kind of go
• 40:19
  back? And that's also incredibly
• 40:20
  impactful from a professional perspective of how to get anyone
• 40:24
  who's experienced your, your company, if you're you're
• 40:27
  building a company and throwing events for that, getting them to
• 40:29
  kind of come back to you. Yeah, yeah.
• 40:32
  It reminds me of kind of like one of my favorite moments in
• 40:36
  pop culture was in Schindler's List movie.
• 40:38
  Obviously very heavy, but Schindler was trying to keep his
• 40:43
  factory opened so we could like have, you know, the Jews
• 40:46
  basically safe. And So what he did is he throws
• 40:48
  a party for all the Nazis that are now, you know, in, I think
• 40:52
  they're in Berlin or something like that.
• 40:54
  And so he throws him a great party.
• 40:55
  He gets them all RIP roaring drunk.
• 40:57
  He spends all the money he has on gift baskets.
• 40:59
  He takes pictures with all of them.
• 41:01
  And then afterward sent them the picture of him with them with a
• 41:05
  nice gift basket, like, hey, thanks so much for coming.
• 41:08
  And so he got a pass, you know, and he, he was able to save all
• 41:11
  those people's lives because they're like Schindler's cool.
• 41:15
  Leave it, leave his factory alone.
• 41:17
  You know, like the, the power of it is, is pretty extraordinary.
• 41:20
  And OK, so I'm sold. I'm doing, I'm going to do a
• 41:23
  small event. I'm using party trick to help
• 41:26
  put everything together so I can feel rest assured that the
• 41:29
  basics are covered and I can think about how I can create
• 41:32
  novelty and delight. I've got that all planned up the
• 41:35
  day of the show's coming up. Now I'm I'm ready to host.
• 41:38
  And like you said, you want to have a certain amount of of
• 41:42
  confident demeanor. You want to make sure everybody
• 41:44
  feels safe. Now, how you show up personally
• 41:47
  and physically is going to play a big part of that.
• 41:50
  So I would love to get your take because you always look
• 41:52
  fantastic. Now I take a little bit
• 41:56
  different approach because I'm not going to trust my instincts.
• 42:00
  I would like to consider myself a man of fashion.
• 42:02
  So if I was to dress how I wanted to dress, I would look
• 42:06
  like Doc Holiday meets Bruce Wayne or something like I might
• 42:10
  have like a hawk feather in a cowboy.
• 42:14
  I love that. I get too, I get too specific
• 42:17
  and I'd be self-conscious. So what I've done, if I'm like
• 42:21
  trying to be in public, what I generally want to do is go for a
• 42:24
  classic American man look, which is like nice blue jeans, clean
• 42:30
  T-shirt, maybe a denim jacket, nice boots and shoes.
• 42:34
  Just something that's like, if someone looks at them, they're
• 42:36
  like, I think I know that guy or that guy looks like my uncle or
• 42:40
  that looks like my cousin. Like I want to fall into that
• 42:42
  category again, where it's like it's generic enough and
• 42:46
  accepting enough that when if my personalities may be a little
• 42:49
  bit too verbose, they'll give me the benefit of the doubt.
• 42:52
  Now I would love to hear kind of how you approach just kind of
• 42:56
  like your outfits or like how you're getting ready and
• 42:58
  prepared the day of. I love that.
• 43:01
  That's amazing. I'm like so neutral always so
• 43:05
  and I think having worked in events for so long, I'm like
• 43:07
  that girl in black who hides in the back.
• 43:10
  I like safe neutrals. That is my vibe.
• 43:14
  My little sister is like the queen bee actress and she is
• 43:18
  like maximalist city and she always has like the most insane
• 43:22
  fashion. So it's interesting because I do
• 43:23
  think feeling comfortable in your skin is the most important
• 43:26
  thing. So I know that I'm going to do
• 43:28
  something that makes me feel comfortable.
• 43:30
  I will get up, I'll go for a run or get some exercise because
• 43:34
  that will set up my whole day for success.
• 43:35
  So, and I try to prep as much of an event as I can prior.
• 43:39
  This is just kind of like when I'm hosting in any capacity.
• 43:42
  How can I basically dry set myself up for success?
• 43:44
  So if it's a trade show, I literally set it up.
• 43:46
  I time it, I photograph it so it's ready to go the day before.
• 43:50
  If it's a cocktail party at my house again, can I put platters
• 43:54
  out and get them all ready? I say that because then that in
• 43:58
  fact my next day and how I approach getting into an event.
• 44:01
  I said, well, I do it in one of two ways.
• 44:03
  So I used to set alarms on my phone to keep me on track
• 44:07
  because I have two kids. I'm running a startup.
• 44:10
  I'm now hosting. I'm running around.
• 44:12
  So running behind is one of the one things that sets hosts up
• 44:16
  for failure. They start getting stressed,
• 44:18
  everything happens too late. And then by the time the event
• 44:20
  comes around, they're exhausted. They maybe didn't eat, they
• 44:22
  maybe didn't get dressed, they maybe didn't have time to like
• 44:24
  wash their hair if they wanted to.
• 44:26
  So I always set a series of alarms and now I use party trick
• 44:29
  for that because that's one of our features where you'll end up
• 44:31
  getting these notifications with those core reminders of, hey,
• 44:35
  you have one hour until this starts, like go eat something,
• 44:39
  make sure you have some water. It sounds silly, but like no one
• 44:42
  likes a hangry host. So how can you set yourself up
• 44:45
  for success or hey, it is time to go get dressed again.
• 44:48
  To your point, it's very easy to get behind when you're hosting
• 44:51
  if you haven't prepped ahead. And so I like to kind of have my
• 44:55
  reminders good to go get my exercise, get my food.
• 44:58
  I don't like the sound silly. I don't eat when I'm hosting
• 45:02
  period. Like I never get to eat the
• 45:04
  food. Last exception, I didn't find an
• 45:06
  oyster like, you know, I think you were there at the oyster
• 45:08
  party. I didn't.
• 45:09
  I think I had some, but not a ton.
• 45:12
  It's one of those things like I I would all hosted a 16 hour
• 45:15
  event and I won't eat the whole day.
• 45:16
  So I have to make sure I I eat before shower before and then
• 45:20
  making sure I'm comfortable. So again, the clothing that I
• 45:23
  feel calm, cool, comfortable in. I very rarely wear, wear heels
• 45:26
  because I'm running around. Unless you're one of those girls
• 45:29
  that like is amazing and can run around in heels all night, don't
• 45:32
  do it. Keep yourself set up for success
• 45:34
  and close it when you feel calm, cool, confident in and that
• 45:38
  you're well fed is a big thing. So that's, I mean, sounds basic,
• 45:42
  but I think we forget the basic steps.
• 45:45
  And so it's important to go go back to basics, get a good
• 45:47
  night's sleep, get food, get water.
• 45:50
  Yeah. Also, it sounds a lot like
• 45:52
  you're preparing for a performance, whether you're a
• 45:54
  singer or you're an athlete. Like what you're doing is like
• 45:57
  making sure physically you're in the right condition, mentally
• 45:59
  you're in the right condition. Take a deep breath and let it
• 46:02
  RIP. Yeah, I think you may or may not
• 46:04
  know this, but I am a marathon runner and I love running.
• 46:08
  It's a big part of my life. And over the last year I've kind
• 46:10
  of lost it and bringing that back right now.
• 46:12
  But it is one of the things that when I was producing these much
• 46:15
  larger events in person, I'd go for like an 18 mile run the day
• 46:18
  before, A10 plus hour event. And everyone was like, why do
• 46:21
  you do that? Doesn't I get you exhausted
• 46:23
  creates a sense of normalcy for me.
• 46:25
  And so if I know that I've had my big stress reduction or
• 46:28
  something that is normal, it allows the kind of, again, the
• 46:32
  show to go on with a semblance of control.
• 46:36
  There's so much that's uncontrollable during these live
• 46:39
  events. How no matter how big or how
• 46:41
  small. So set all the things that you
• 46:43
  can control, and that is, again, as basic as what you're going to
• 46:48
  wear, the shoes you might put on and bring options.
• 46:50
  Yeah, yeah. No, it's so it's so smart
• 46:53
  because yeah, it it well, it's kind of like tricks your body
• 46:56
  and do like it's not the big day.
• 46:58
  It's it's the day before recovery.
• 47:00
  Like tomorrow I'm going to get a massage and I guess same old
• 47:02
  thing. Your body is convinced, you
• 47:04
  know, it's like, it's like in yoga practice where when you're
• 47:08
  most gassed is when you breathe the slowest because your breath
• 47:11
  really regulates your, your heart to be like, oh, no, we're
• 47:14
  OK, you know, and you have control over that.
• 47:18
  A vent could go sideways. You don't have control over
• 47:20
  that, but you have control over what you have control over, I
• 47:22
  suppose. You can control how you respond.
• 47:25
  It's all about that response during that one.
• 47:26
  So yeah, we're sure. Cool.
• 47:30
  You said you're a runner. You mind if I ask you some other
• 47:32
  personal questions while I have a a little bit of time with you
• 47:34
  go. For it.
• 47:36
  Cool. I have the great pleasure of
• 47:39
  knowing dozens and dozens and dozens of amazing women
• 47:43
  founders, entrepreneurs, just incredible.
• 47:46
  But for some folks, you know, they, they might not be
• 47:49
  accustomed to it or it becomes kind of like we need more women
• 47:52
  in business. We need more women in STEM.
• 47:54
  I'm not the great person, greatest person to ask because I
• 47:56
  see so many of them, you know, I work with so many of them.
• 47:59
  But I'd love to know from you, you know, what about being a
• 48:02
  woman is kind of a superpower in business.
• 48:06
  You know, I think at this chapter of my life as a mom, no
• 48:10
  one works more effectively or efficiently than a mom.
• 48:14
  And so I put that in kind of like that female capacity.
• 48:16
  And again, that could that could span out.
• 48:19
  But I do think we have to approach things really
• 48:21
  differently than, you know, And again, this is a mom who, who is
• 48:26
  a both, both partners working right.
• 48:29
  So in our capacity, it's like we have to, oh goodness, trying to
• 48:34
  bring this in the right way, juggle many things and
• 48:37
  ruthlessly prioritize. And it forces ruthless
• 48:39
  prioritization. And I think that's more that's a
• 48:41
  little bit different for women than it is for men.
• 48:44
  I think the perspective, I think that we have a lot of times from
• 48:48
  a 30,000 foot view going back to high level strategy, but then
• 48:51
  getting down into the weeds is something that we inherently
• 48:53
  have to do when you think about just like the life that
• 48:56
  typically falls upon women to manage.
• 48:58
  And so and I looked a lot of my female founder friends, we're up
• 49:04
  against a lot of stereotypes and we're up against a lot of
• 49:08
  preconceived notions about who we are.
• 49:10
  And so there's a lot of like chips on our shoulders of hey,
• 49:12
  watch me, prove me wrong, which keeps things going.
• 49:15
  But then we also have that fine balance of mindset of how how we
• 49:20
  first work on top of of our life.
• 49:23
  And can you have it all? No, you can't.
• 49:25
  But can you ruthlessly prioritize and look at how
• 49:28
  things fit at various chapters? We most certainly can.
• 49:32
  Yeah, it's, it's incredible. And it, you know, I think
• 49:34
  culturally women have inherited kind of like a, a mental voice
• 49:38
  that dudes don't really have to deal with, which is, you know,
• 49:41
  women founder. Either they're thinking I'm not
• 49:44
  giving enough attention to my business or I'm not giving
• 49:47
  enough attention to my family. You know, this is something that
• 49:50
  for whatever reason, they're just like, I was going to work,
• 49:53
  you know what I mean? But it's common with with all
• 49:56
  the women I talked to. So how do you kind of like,
• 49:59
  wrestle with that voice inside your head?
• 50:03
  I think there's a surrender to nothing's ever enough, which is
• 50:06
  so sad. It is.
• 50:07
  It's like, how can you surrender and not try to achieve?
• 50:10
  I think again, our ex, like the alignment of expectations in
• 50:13
  reality is where suffering exists.
• 50:15
  That's a weird way to say it, right?
• 50:16
  You can suffer or you can surrender or you can accept it
• 50:19
  as is. And so, you know, I had two, two
• 50:22
  little ones and when I'm with them, I am present with them.
• 50:24
  But sometimes when I'm with them, I'm at ice skating
• 50:26
  practice or lacrosse, I'm on my computer.
• 50:29
  And so it's picking and choosing the time where I want to be
• 50:32
  present for those moments. And I don't want to miss those.
• 50:34
  But I also have work priorities. And then when I'm 100% on with
• 50:38
  my kids, I'm 100% on with my kids.
• 50:40
  And I know that I've just like showed up the best way that I
• 50:43
  can. And the more I beat myself up,
• 50:45
  the more ineffective I will be either with the kids or at work.
• 50:49
  So surrendering to the fact that like it's never going to be
• 50:51
  enough and just let it go and just know that like I'm putting
• 50:54
  in the best effort every single day.
• 50:56
  And so that's sort of big mindset thing, a big shift for
• 50:59
  me that just not lowering my expectations, but progress, not
• 51:03
  perfection. Yeah, I love that.
• 51:06
  And that message, I think is really universal for everybody,
• 51:09
  guys included, largely because, you know, the theme of, you
• 51:12
  know, 2026 is I feel behind, you know, like everybody feels
• 51:18
  behind. And that that idea of surrender,
• 51:21
  it's like, look, man, it, you're never going to get ahead of it.
• 51:24
  So you might as well surrender to be at the place you are.
• 51:27
  So that that way at least you're standing in your own 2 feet and
• 51:30
  you're there mentally. You know, I think that's great.
• 51:33
  And you know, one thing I love is that you're very.
• 51:35
  Candid about that, in public about that.
• 51:37
  You're, you're like a fantastic follow on Instagram because
• 51:40
  you're kind of chronicling your life and I don't want to say
• 51:43
  about, but like the way that you, you live with it within
• 51:46
  your, your work and your family at the same time.
• 51:49
  It's really cool and touching to see.
• 51:51
  Thank you. I will say, I think that the
• 51:53
  more we can be open, I think women in general try to position
• 51:56
  everything as being incredibly perfect, right?
• 51:59
  I'm the perfect mother, I'm the perfect XY and Z.
• 52:02
  And showing vulnerability, showing realness, showing the
• 52:05
  struggles as well as the wind is incredibly important.
• 52:07
  The more that people that talk about that, the more normalized
• 52:10
  it becomes and it allows us all to have permission that like no
• 52:14
  one actually has it all together.
• 52:15
  And when I went through my divorce and I've gone through a
• 52:17
  couple other, you know, losing my father, I spoke pretty openly
• 52:20
  about these things and I got so, so much phenomenal response and
• 52:24
  support back. And my mother was like, I can't
• 52:28
  believe you're airing your dirty laundry.
• 52:29
  Like, well, that's not actually like this is a point of
• 52:32
  connection and it's helping others, but it's helping me and
• 52:35
  it's making us realize like we don't have to have everything,
• 52:38
  like absolutely perfect. The the beauty is in the perf
• 52:41
  in, in the imperfection. And that actually gives others
• 52:45
  permission. And it gives ourselves
• 52:46
  permission and a reminder of like, Nope, it will be OK.
• 52:49
  And if, again, going with that theme of the year, yeah, like, I
• 52:53
  had massive goals last weekend of things that I wanted to do.
• 52:56
  Honestly, some agents I wanted to build and some stuff for
• 52:58
  work. And my kids needed me.
• 53:01
  And I said, you know what? I'm going to be behind on this,
• 53:04
  but this is more important right now.
• 53:06
  And you just let it go and you pick it up in a few days.
• 53:08
  And remember that the majority of people who are in our field
• 53:12
  and who are doing this are such greater, higher achievers than
• 53:14
  the majority of people out there.
• 53:15
  But we get done by 12. Like I'm a morning person.
• 53:18
  So for me, by like 10 AM, probably most people don't get
• 53:21
  that done in a week. So how can we have some
• 53:24
  perspective and actually look at things around and realize, OK, I
• 53:27
  might feel behind. I'm not as far ahead as some
• 53:29
  others, but I'm still doing really well.
• 53:32
  I think it's a good, good thing to remind ourselves.
• 53:35
  I agree, you know, and I, it kind of taps into a lot of kind
• 53:38
  of what I want to do with the show, you know, because I give
• 53:41
  it consideration of like, how do I want the audience to feel if
• 53:45
  they listen to the show and I'm going to start rapping delight
• 53:49
  into there, I'm going to have to figure out a magic trick or
• 53:51
  something I could do because that would be fun.
• 53:53
  But a lot of it is I, I want them to feel cared for and
• 53:56
  supported, you know, because when you're, you're really in
• 53:58
  the trenches, how it's really, really hard to, to, to found a
• 54:02
  company and, and deal with everything that comes along with
• 54:05
  that. Staffing, taxes, investors like
• 54:08
  it's, it's really hard, you know, and a lot of times
• 54:11
  they're, most folks are going to put a Sheen on it.
• 54:14
  You know, if you go down the, the, the vacuum of LinkedIn or
• 54:17
  X, it's just everybody like, I built 17 projects and made $100
• 54:21
  million last year and I, I've got ABS and I'm on a boat.
• 54:25
  You know, you're like, great. You know, there's, there's so
• 54:27
  much of that people standing on a Lamborghini or something that
• 54:31
  it I, I want, I want founders to feel like heard that like it
• 54:36
  hurts, you know, So I, I think it's important to to talk about
• 54:39
  some of these more, you know, ticky tacky kind of subjects.
• 54:44
  Yeah, OK. It's a real vulnerable.
• 54:46
  Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.
• 54:48
  Let them know it's it's going to be OK, you know, So we got a
• 54:51
  couple of minutes left. We're about to enter the quantum
• 54:53
  round. Are you ready for this?
• 54:54
  Hope so. OK, so aside, Speaking of being
• 55:00
  behind, no aside from party trick, what kind of experiments
• 55:03
  and fun stuff are you doing with AI right now or thinking about?
• 55:07
  I, I like hack, I'm a well, I'm a total efficiency and like a
• 55:11
  productivity nerd in every single area of my life.
• 55:13
  And I live between three places and the mountains in Denver and
• 55:16
  then back on the East Coast. So I play a ton with like
• 55:20
  optimizing everything in my life in terms of like my homes, my
• 55:23
  residences, my travel, my schedule, my kids, all that.
• 55:26
  So setting up honestly, all the various tools to automate as
• 55:30
  much of my personal life as possible.
• 55:32
  So that's, that's a big one and what I've been playing with a
• 55:35
  lot in clawed chat, honestly, like everything is integrated
• 55:39
  because my work life and my personal life are so close.
• 55:42
  But I kind of will choose task by task or area by area.
• 55:44
  And that's one where like right now, that's that's a really fun
• 55:47
  one for me. I'm not building a little apps
• 55:48
  on my own. It's really about the
• 55:49
  productivity and efficiency in my personal life so I can focus
• 55:52
  on kids and work. 100%, I love it.
• 55:56
  And you said you studied psychology.
• 55:57
  I believe you also studied art history.
• 55:59
  Is that right? Yeah.
• 56:01
  If you were going to college now as a freshman, what would you
• 56:03
  study? I don't love this answer but
• 56:09
  honestly whatever you're excited about and passionate about, I
• 56:12
  wouldn't say go down one particular path.
• 56:13
  I think right now with college and especially with AI, how
• 56:16
  people can relate to other humans is the most important
• 56:18
  thing and we'll set you up for greater success.
• 56:20
  I was talking with a college friend actually the other day
• 56:23
  and was like college costs this much money, this is a total
• 56:25
  waste. The skills that you're going to
• 56:27
  learn are less like from an academic perspective.
• 56:30
  I think it's more perspective to things that make you a more
• 56:32
  well-rounded human and individual because there is so
• 56:35
  much from like that we can go on and learn or use AI for, but how
• 56:41
  you can interact with people, do the network that you build is
• 56:44
  not something that you can hack your way into as easily.
• 56:46
  And so whatever, like if it's sociology, if it's economics,
• 56:50
  whatever you're kind of excited and passionate about and where
• 56:53
  you think you're going to be able to actually learn how best
• 56:55
  to interact with other humans. Yeah, I love that, you know, and
• 57:00
  now more than ever, it's going to take a little bit of faith,
• 57:03
  for lack of a better word, to like trust what you love, dive
• 57:08
  into it with all your heart and let it consume you and then
• 57:10
  figure out, you know, on the backside, what's the product?
• 57:13
  I mean, you're a great example of that.
• 57:14
  You study art history and psychology events, of course,
• 57:19
  you know, it's like aesthetics and timing and people their
• 57:25
  their issues. I mean, it, it totally makes
• 57:27
  sense. It's pretty cool.
• 57:31
  The audience of the show loves ideas.
• 57:33
  Obviously we're all chasing shiny things.
• 57:35
  Do you have any business ideas that you feel like could be
• 57:37
  profitable from day one? I mean, I, I always joke about
• 57:44
  hire a husband and it's not actually, it's more like this
• 57:48
  kind of like fractional house manager situation.
• 57:51
  And again, there's a, there's a much larger service component.
• 57:54
  I know so many women whose husbands, and then again, using
• 57:59
  a lot of stereotypes here, women whose husbands are supposed to
• 58:01
  be handy and they they aren't. They don't know what they're
• 58:03
  doing or recently divorced and they're like, they're scared and
• 58:06
  they're wasting so much time. I would pay so much to have like
• 58:09
  literally my quote UN quote on call husband to help me with
• 58:12
  these things. But like it's so scattered
• 58:14
  across, OK, I need electrical help.
• 58:15
  My internet's not working here, this, this and this.
• 58:17
  But I don't need a full time property manager.
• 58:20
  So how do I just like dial a quote UN quote husband.
• 58:23
  I've wanted that for years and years.
• 58:24
  So I think that could be, honestly, guys actually won't
• 58:28
  pay for it. I don't think it's quickly.
• 58:29
  I think it's like a threat a little bit.
• 58:31
  But I mean, women and women control 80% of the economy.
• 58:34
  So go after them. That's a brilliant idea.
• 58:38
  You know, I, I think it could be like, you know, a, a wife too.
• 58:43
  Yeah, totally. Especially.
• 58:45
  For working women of just like it's like I don't need someone
• 58:48
  to clean. I just really need someone to
• 58:49
  organize the closet and then, you know, but I mean, Elon's
• 58:53
  trying to deliver robots into our houses.
• 58:55
  Do you think you'd be on the front line of having some
• 58:57
  humanoid robot that can, you know, undo the the pickle jar
• 59:00
  and can like hammer in the deck, the nails in the deck?
• 59:03
  So sure about that. I think my kids would love it.
• 59:05
  I think my dog would hate it. I don't know.
• 59:09
  Yeah. No, I I not so sure how I feel
• 59:12
  about those. I mean, I have like, I have a
• 59:13
  room button. I have all the fun of those
• 59:14
  ones. But yeah, I don't know.
• 59:16
  What about you? Would you?
• 59:20
  Oh, no, I'm on the fence. I, I think that I'd be like the
• 59:24
  dog. If it looks like a humanoid, I
• 59:26
  think I'd hate it. You know, I even if it was put
• 59:30
  away, like if, if there was a robot in the house right now and
• 59:33
  I just like, what is it doing in the closet?
• 59:35
  No. Is he sitting in there?
• 59:36
  You know, I don't know if it looked like a vacuum cleaner,
• 59:39
  I'd be like, all right, yeah, put it away or whatever.
• 59:40
  But there's something like if it has arms and it knows karate,
• 59:43
  probably not. Yeah, I think maybe that'll be
• 59:46
  different. Like my children, your children,
• 59:47
  like when they're a little bit older, they're like, Oh, yeah,
• 59:50
  that's normal. Like, and, you know, times 60
• 59:52
  years later. But I think for us, there's like
• 59:54
  the psychology behind wait, I don't there's a human wait.
• 59:57
  What's that? So yeah.
• 1:00:00
  I know if it was doing the dishes and it was in my way and
• 1:00:02
  I wanted to make a sandwich, I would be upset.
• 1:00:05
  I'd be like robot, just if you see me me coming, you better get
• 1:00:08
  out of the way. I don't want to see with the
• 1:00:09
  kitchen. Yeah, it could come out when I'm
• 1:00:12
  gone, unfortunately, like I work from home in a lot of places
• 1:00:16
  that I'm like, all right, I don't know how it would actually
• 1:00:18
  do its job, so. Percent cool is there What are
• 1:00:23
  what are you excited about for media, TV shows, sporting
• 1:00:26
  events, like anything to recommend albums, books.
• 1:00:30
  So great question. That's actually one of my
• 1:00:32
  favorite Ice Breakers at events. I love to see like, what was the
• 1:00:35
  best piece of media you consumed recently?
• 1:00:36
  Was it like what great podcast or what are you watching?
• 1:00:39
  I'm watching Shrinking right now.
• 1:00:41
  I love it on TV. Like it's just so from the
• 1:00:45
  psychological perspective, I think it's really fun to watch.
• 1:00:48
  I'm excited to watch love story, which again, love Carol beside
• 1:00:51
  Kennedy when I was young. And I think like it's trending
• 1:00:54
  right now a lot on on socials and her style has come back.
• 1:00:57
  It's very like, you know, this 90s revival and that nostalgia.
• 1:01:01
  So that's on the non business front.
• 1:01:03
  That's on the personal front. And then I mean, I unfortunately
• 1:01:07
  consume so many newsletters and podcasts of the wazoo.
• 1:01:10
  It's like the topics that hit versus actually things that I'm
• 1:01:14
  kind of like shows that I go back to over and over right now.
• 1:01:17
  But I'm going to go with the fun stuff because I feel like my
• 1:01:19
  life has been very work heavy recently.
• 1:01:22
  So I need like a little levity and I need the like, I want to
• 1:01:24
  just go get lost in a show that actually has nothing to do with
• 1:01:28
  my life. I need like a little bit of like
• 1:01:29
  fantasy and escapism, like, you know, great beach read which I
• 1:01:33
  have not had in years, so. Incredible.
• 1:01:37
  Virginia, I know you got a hard out.
• 1:01:38
  I'll let you go, but thank you so much for joining us.
• 1:01:41
  I'm going to put all of the recommendations that you gave
• 1:01:44
  today in the show notes below. So bookmark this, ladies and
• 1:01:46
  gentlemen, when you're ready to to, to plan that event, you'll
• 1:01:51
  have it all laid out. And definitely check out Party
• 1:01:53
  trick.com for managing all of your events.
• 1:01:57
  Virginia what's the best place for people to connect with you
• 1:01:59
  online? Find me on LinkedIn which will
• 1:02:02
  be in the show notes or find me and DM me on Instagram.
• 1:02:05
  I'm pretty active on there and love love chatting with all of
• 1:02:08
  you guys. So thank you so much for finding
• 1:02:10
  me. You are about to spend anywhere
• 1:02:13
  from 100,000 to $300,000 on your kids college education and
• 1:02:17
  that's not a small bet. And right now there's a very
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  real chance that they graduate and can't find a job.
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  Not because they weren't smart enough, not because they didn't
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  work hard enough, but because the job market changed and
• 1:02:28
  nobody told them Employers. Are hiring AI native candidates
• 1:02:32
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• 1:02:35
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• 1:03:00
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• 1:03:06
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