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Defeat Fear · Effective Communication

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: And now Effective Communication with Phil Zeller, CEO Dale Carnegie
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Southwest Michigan. So there I was just last night I
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  Speaker 1: met an amazing person. Have you met an amazing person recently? So? There,
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  Speaker 1: I was in a Dale Carnegie class last night. I
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  Speaker 1: was stopping by and visiting, and I met a woman
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  Speaker 1: who is raising five children all by herself. She's working
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  Speaker 1: full time and she wants her kids to be successful,
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  Speaker 1: and she's doing it all by herself. Now, think about
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  Speaker 1: that for a moment. Some of you say, well, yeah,
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  Speaker 1: that happens every day, Phil, Does it a person who's
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  Speaker 1: facing the fear of raising five children all by themselves,
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  Speaker 1: going to work hard every day and not letting the
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  Speaker 1: fear and the questioning overtake them. Does that happen every day?
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  Speaker 1: So this is my question, Phil Zeller effective Communication. You
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  Speaker 1: meet an amazing person like that, how are they doing it?
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  Speaker 1: How are they facing the challenges of life? They're married,
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  Speaker 1: they have a great life, and then all of a
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  Speaker 1: sudden their marriage dissolves, not because they wanted to, but
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  Speaker 1: it does, and then they're there alone raising five children.
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  Speaker 1: You see, there is in that moment, as she shared,
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  Speaker 1: there is not an option for failure. There is not
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  Speaker 1: when you have five people depending on you as you're
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  Speaker 1: the mother. And I've shared this before on the show.
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  Speaker 1: There's no greater love from my experience than that of
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  Speaker 1: a mother and a child. There is no greater love.
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  Speaker 1: And I'm a dad and I've earned the right to
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  Speaker 1: say that. I've watched it firsthand. There's no greater love
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  Speaker 1: than a mother and their child. It's an amazing thing
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  Speaker 1: to watch and I've got to watch it firsthand multiple
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  Speaker 1: times in my life and it's an amazing thing. So
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  Speaker 1: see a mother do that. And as a listener and
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  Speaker 1: she shared this story with me, I was taken aback
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  Speaker 1: to everything that Dale Carnegie ever documented about overcoming fear
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  Speaker 1: and that you can overcome and defeat fear. And last
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  Speaker 1: night that was an example of a person doing it.
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  Speaker 1: And you can do it too, and you've known people
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  Speaker 1: who have done it. But it's so obvious that we
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  Speaker 1: miss it that we can overcome fears in our life,
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  Speaker 1: and you know how we do it. It's probably not
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  Speaker 1: a lineary answer, but you do it just like she's
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  Speaker 1: doing it. Dale Carnegie said the way to overcome a
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  Speaker 1: fear or fears is to commit to a course of conduct,
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  Speaker 1: follow it keep so busy and work so hard that
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  Speaker 1: you forget about being afraid. You see, you've met people
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  Speaker 1: like that, and maybe you are that person, and in
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  Speaker 1: that moment, in that time, you're like, failure is not
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  Speaker 1: an option. These people are dependent on me, and I've
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  Speaker 1: got to make it happen. And the reality is so
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  Speaker 1: many people right now are being overcome by their fears
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  Speaker 1: because they're not focused on what their course of conduct is.
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  Speaker 1: They haven't taken the time to sit down and ask himself,
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  Speaker 1: what is my purpose? What difference could I make? And
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  Speaker 1: if I could make a difference, what would that look
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  Speaker 1: like and what would that be? So I challenge you
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  Speaker 1: to write down the answers these questions and ask yourself,
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  Speaker 1: what is my purpose? What is my course of conduct?
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  Speaker 1: To live out that purpose, what will it do? And
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  Speaker 1: then commit to it. And when you commit to that
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  Speaker 1: course of conduct, failure is not an option because you're
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  Speaker 1: going to be so busy going at it, you're not
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  Speaker 1: going to have time to think about the fear. Because
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  Speaker 1: the fear doesn't provide the solution. The fear takes away
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  Speaker 1: from your course of conduct and the outcome that you want.
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  Speaker 1: So you want to overcome fear Dale Currgie says, attack it,
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  Speaker 1: hit it, head on, go after it. You know why,
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  Speaker 1: because what you have to do is more important than
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  Speaker 1: that fear. The difference you want to make is more
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  Speaker 1: important than that fear, and it always will be because
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  Speaker 1: you know your purpose. So write it down. What is it?
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  Speaker 1: What's your course of conduct? What are you going to
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  Speaker 1: do to make sure you take care of what you
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  Speaker 1: need to take care of because people are depending on you.
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  Speaker 1: And as I listed this woman last night, I couldn't
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  Speaker 1: just said there, I just said, you know what, thank
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  Speaker 1: you for sharing with me. I'm so proud of you
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  Speaker 1: because you hear a story like that and you can't
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  Speaker 1: help but feel proud for that person who's garnered control.
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  Speaker 1: And the way they garnered control is they got so
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  Speaker 1: busy knowing their purpose and what they need to do
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  Speaker 1: to help those around them. They don't have time to
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  Speaker 1: be scared. They don't have time to talk about fear.
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  Speaker 1: They don't have time to be a victim. They're too
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  Speaker 1: busy living out a purpose and getting things done. So
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  Speaker 1: think about your life right now, and if you seriously
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  Speaker 1: want to overcome fears, write down what your purpose is,
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  Speaker 1: lay out a course of conduct and get so busy
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  Speaker 1: on it that you're not going to have time for
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  Speaker 1: fear because you're going to completely squeeze it out and
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  Speaker 1: it will not exist because you have a purposeful life
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  Speaker 1: to live, not go make it happen.