Latest / Giving Pain Purpose with Lyndsay Soprano / CRPS in Remission

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CRPS in Remission · Giving Pain Purpose with Lyndsay Soprano

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This is Your Pain Game podcast where we talk about the game of living in
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and with chronic pain and trauma, getting to the heart of how to heal.
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I am your host, Lindsay Soprano. On the show, I plan
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on discussing with doctors, chronic pain patients, ballistic practitioners, loved ones,
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and anybody that is interested in having their voice heard in the chronic pain and
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trauma world that we live in. So I actually have a pretty freaking killer
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singing voice, if I do say so myself. I was classically trained.
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I was an opera major. I traveled and competed all over the place all
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through junior high, high school, in college, and then I got into
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San Francisco States Opera Program. And once I got up there, I moved
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there. I got into it, and I started doing my thing. I
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decided I did not want to be a thespian, so I stopped. I
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still sing in weddings and funerals, and you know, I would go in
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and guests, you know, guest appear if there was some banda's local in
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La or Orange County that needed a front girl, and I would stand in
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for. But that was basically I sing in the house and sing in the
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shower. I sing to my dogs and sing to my sweeting. But I
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have my choice. Les. I wanted to make sure that I had a
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job because the scary world of performing and having to serve tables for the rest
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of your life. Not that that's a bad job, because I value hospitality
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like nobody's business. I just knew that I didn't want to do that.
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So I started my marketing agency almost twenty four years ago now, and I
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have it looked back. But I do have those days where I really wish
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that I would have pursued my music career and used the voice that I was
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gifted with, and instead it looks like I'm using my voice in a different
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way here on this show. And so now that I've given my pain purpose
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right as my listeners know at this point, being here with you every day,
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all day, every week, whether you're listening to my show or not,
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I'm with you because I'm working on it. And the way that CRPS
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has changed the trajectory of my life is a daily resilience test, to say
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the least. Yesterday, in fact, I felt like every bone in my
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body had been crushed and I was just laying on the couch completely and able
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to function or form sentences. So I'm glad that recording is today instead of
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yesterday. So anyways, life tends to throw us massive obstacles, doesn't it,
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you know? And my guest today is no stranger to also belting out
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some tunes or to CRPS either. So, without further ado, I'd like
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to introduce you to my guest today, Annie Vander. Hey, girlie,
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Hey, how are you so happy to see you? She pops up and
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this She's got the most beautiful smile and she's just such a little rock star.
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You guys are going to enjoy her and her voice is so sweet.
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But Annie is now a country singer, but she wasn't always one. She
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used to own a pet that practice that she was working with, and then
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she had working at and then she had something happened to her. She had
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a terrible accident. And she's going to talk about that briefly, and we're
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going to talk about CRPS. So are you ready to rock and roll here?
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I'm okay, sounds good. So I'd like to start by talking about
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your diagnosis with CRPS and your experience with that, how it happened, And
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then i want to get to the good part about remission, because that is
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the part of hope that I really want to make sure that my listeners have
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today from you, especially with people that have chronic illnesses like CRPS that are
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just so incredibly impossible to treat. Always nice to hear a story of remission,
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even though I'm a little jealous over here. Well, I'm going to
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send those remission vibes to you. Yes, So diagnosis, Oh my gosh,
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that was a relief and terrifying all at the same time. Basically,
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where to start with it is I fell, which you know, shattered my
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wrist and my hand was completely sideways blah blah blah, and the killer parties.
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I was supposed to go on this beautiful Southern Caribbean crew my keys.
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We were dropping a key off of the neighbor's house, bags at the door
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Hooper's on the way to get us sixty below in Chicago, and boo down
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I go so not, you know, and I thought that that was going
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to be the worst of it, like, oh, we're just going to
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miss out on this cruise. But no, I was healing fine. Basically
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I ended up needing a plate and screws and all the things. I had
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to rebuild everything, and I started pet or ot actually at the time,
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occupational therapy, and I was doing well for a few weeks until all the
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sudden things started regressing and I woke up one Friday night and I told my
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husband, I woke up like just blood curling scream. Doctor reacts raided my
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arm. And I really didn't realize at the time how much I was regressing
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in therapy, and the therapist kept saying, She's like, you know,
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you're doing good. She knew I was doing the exercises, I'm doing everything
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I'm supposed to do, and it just was she was baffled. So when
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they re ex rayed my arm when I went back, they said everything looks
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fine, and I actually ended up with a really fast diagnosis compared to most
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people. Yeah, her, I'm very thankful. I had an orthopedic surgeon
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who was familiar with what it was. So I went back to the occupational
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therapist and you know, she sees my arm again and it's again worse,
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and then she's like, you need to go back to the orthor I go,
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don't worry, girl, already did that, you know, so dumb?
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She I told her. I said, yeah, the doctor said,
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I have this thing called reflex sympathetic dystrophy or CRPS. She goes, whatever
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you do, don't google it, and I'm like, yeah, amen,
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sister, but what do we all do? Yeah? Yeah, well I
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am already because I literally I wanted. If memory serves me right, it
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would have been a Monday that I would have went, because I remember it
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was Friday with the incidet with the dog, so if I had pt,
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it would have had to be a weekday. So my guess is I waited
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till Monday, went back to the orthopedic guide, and then went straight to
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therapy, and I googled it and didn't really have time for it to process.
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I was like, okay, so I've got this. I guess I'll
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have to look at this later. And it didn't sink in. And then
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she said that, and she looks straight at me, and she said,
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you can't come here for therapy anymore. She goes, because no one here
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knows how to treat this. She goes, but please don't tell anybody here
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because I could lose my job. And at this point, my you know,
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the broken risk. The pain was traveling up my arm and my shoulder
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starts to lock up. And I don't want to say it's a blessing that
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you know, because it's not a blessing that you have this at all.
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But it's rare to talk to someone who actually, which I'm sure you know,
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knows what CRPS is. I do. I have it full body.
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Yeah, you get it, and it's that sucks. But yeah, she's
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like, so the orthopedic actually wrote in order then for therapy, Okay,
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we're going to do therapy on your shoulder now too, and you know,
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including my whatever, arm, wrist, whatever. And I did one day
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there, one extra day and then when I saw the girl through my shoulder,
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I looked at her. She's doing exercises with me, and she's like,
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all right, I said, have you ever seen anyone reach remission with
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CRPS? She goes, We've never even seen anyone here with this, so
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I don't know. And in that moment, I knew I gotta get the
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hell out of here. Yes, And that is a message because I have
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found the same thing that you can actually do more harm than healing if you
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don't have somebody that knows how to work with CRPS. It is one of
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the most challenging things that anybody has to work with the people that have it
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and the people that are trying to help, because everybody's body handles CRPS a
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little bit different. The way it's going to fire off, the way it
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flares, the way the places that it's affected, you know, and it's
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nuts. So make sure that you are fully vetting the people that you are
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working with that are trying to help your body. I don't care if it's
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just a knee surgery injury. Anything can happen. Guys, like we've I've
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been hurt in therapy, I've been hurt by doctors. Just really really be
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careful. I think that's a really important mess. No, she is,
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And it's like, you know, and I had been through some other things
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not CRPS related, years before, and like that was and you know,
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there's I don't know, I could end up going down a rabbit hole and
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I don't want to go there. But I think anything medical you have to
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be your own advocate. But especially with CRPS, it's like because things are
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just like you said, exactly like you said, you just don't know what
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is going to set something off. Yeah, you can go up the rails
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pretty quick, Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah. So the girl that I
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was an ot with what really stunk was like, you know, we had
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a good like you know, not that she's a co worker, but I
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guess essentially they kind of are because you see them, Yeah, they all
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the time, right, So she was cool to chat with and hang with
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while we're doing what we have to do to get me better. So I'm
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like, well, this stinks, you know. So but she said she
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did some continuing education with somebody who literally traveled the world and taught people how
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to treat CRPS. And I was like, okay. And at first,
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what's interesting is this guy took the diagnosis of CRPS away from me, and
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he's like, yeah, I don't think you have that. I think he
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was just trying to also get me in a mindset like you're gonna be fine.
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You're gonna be fine, You're gonna be fine. By the time I
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was getting better and I was actually able to start going to a regular PT,
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he's like, so I do think he goes, it's probably a milder
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form of CRPS and you caught it early, blah blah blah. And he's
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like, I do think that this is what you have, And I'm like,
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I'm thinking, why the hell would you tell me that? But every
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day I would walk in there, he had this thing in a city would
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just basically be like fear as a liar, you know, And he was
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just trying to keep me positive and all the things. My mom passed away
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at sixty one. She fell and had an accident, broke her shoulder,
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She busted all that a plates pins, the whole nine yards. And there's
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a day I remember going back to take care of her, and and she
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was like, Anne Marie. The whole name is Anne Marie. She's like
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my real name. She's like, you need to She goes, you need
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to feed me. She was like, I can't use my arm. I
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go, my mom, you broke your other arm. You know, Like,
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what's wrong with you? She was, it just hurts, And like,
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over the course of five years, everything was just like her body was
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just locking up. And she actually ended up becoming bedridden and no one could
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ever diagnose her. And then I'm like, I'm sitting here thinking in hindsight,
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I'm like, holy crap, is this what she had? Kind of
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a thing? You know, Wow, we'll never know for sure, you
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know. She ultimately died of a pulmonary embolism. But she was you know,
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it was like this cocktail of hay meds and sleep aids and not moving
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and stuff like that, and just and I'm like, oh my god,
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like, am I going to have any quality of life? So right after
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the diagnosis and everything, am I going to have quality of life? I
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lost? And it was a pet sitting dog walking business. I worked as
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a veterinary technician for somebody else for like, I don't know, for fifteen
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twenty years or so, spun it off into my own pet care business,
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and then you know it being out for so long, I just I ended
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up having to close the doors and so I lose my I lose that.
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That's huge. So now what am I going to do it for work?
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Am I gonna live normal again? I was so depressed, terrified, and
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then the rest, I don't know, It's it's kind of funny. I
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feel like it's this big blessing in disguise, and like you're doing so You're
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you're doing your podcast right, which is awesome, and I love that you're
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doing it. And I'm meeting so many people now and I think through my
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publicist and stuff like that, and it's like seeing all the positive things that
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people are doing and trying to help is amazing. So thank you for that.
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We don't make me cry as on this, so I cry really easy,
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Okay, So all right, I can't even cry because you're too pretty
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when you smile, So I cry a nice smile simultaneously. I get it.
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So I pushed. I pushed through it. Baby, I pushed through
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it, yea too. So so basically, oh man, where was I
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with this? Yeah? So, while I was going through all this therapy
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stuff, my husband and I had a karaoke machine at our house and we
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had it for parties and stuff and this, you know, we had it
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from before I got hurt. We love we love to entertain and m I
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don't remember which party we got it for, but anyway, it was just
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kind of sitting in front of me and I used to thing and and I
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didn't even realize it at the time. It kind of became distraction therapy,
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and then all the reading and stuff and learning more about CRPS and like it
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stimulates the vegas nerve and like all these benefits it had and I didn't even
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realize it. So now you fast forward to the point when I am in
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remission, when I'm done with therapy, even the regular PT and I get
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a job in a door and window company. And this is November of twenty
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nineteen. Well now a few months later after after that, what happens COVID
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No, I'm not working again. So so yeah, and so one thing
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leads to another during my process, though if I go back again to it
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was like May early Rejune, right after my accident. I was traveling with
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heating pads, ice packs, all my meds and all the things. And
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my husband was like, because not only was my vacation canceled, now he's
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at home taking care of me. And he was so burned out at the
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time, but he's like, we need to go somewhere. I'm like,
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I don't think I can fly, Like I can't handle being at an airplane.
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So we just packed up the car. He drove me to Hilton Head,
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South Carolina. We spent time on the beach, and we made we
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stopped at Vanderbilt, we saw that, and then he goes, do you
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want to go to Nashville? He knows how much I like music. I
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said, yeah, let's make a stop and we went to this place called
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the Listening Room, and I got the information for an artist coach out there,
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and I just kind of kept in my back pocket, like what if
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I ever because it's always been in the back of my head, like what
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if I ever pursued music again? Oh yeah, well now then it was
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almost a year later, just shy of a year later. I used that
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email address, reached out. We had this little, you know, phone
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interview and talked about what I wanted to achieve, blah blah blah, and
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the rest is history. And here I am talking to you and put music
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out. It's crazy. So it's like I could either be like, oh
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my god, that was the worst year of my life, or I can
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look at it like it was the biggest blessing in disguise. Yeah, I
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mean, it's it's just crazy how things all happen. But it's one of
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the questions. She asked me, if you could say something to yourself then,
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like if your future you like me now, could say something to me,
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then what would you say. I said, I don't think that I
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would tell myself that I would be going on radio tours and cut music and
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doing all the stuff, because I would think that I went insane. So
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by insane me, okay, an you became a lunar tic, right,
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Like, yeah, so my real name is Anne Vandermulin and my artist's name
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is Annie Vander. That's how you find my stuff. But either way,
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it's like, yeah, you go by Annie Vander now and you're gonna be
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on country radio and I'd be like, oh, those drugs must get really
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good later on. So but I think I would just you know, like
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and I don't remember exactly, I don't think I ordered it exactly like that
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talking to her, but it was basically like I just I know I would
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want to say like, hey, it's gonna be okay, you're gonna be
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fine, you're gonna reach remission, there's better days ahead, and and honestly,
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even when things work terrible, because I had some pretty unbearable days and
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I know you can relate, it's uh, I don't know, it's just
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like even in that, I think, you know, and my therapist would
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tell me like, some days are gonna be some days are gonna be down
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here, then you're gonna go up and then you're gonna go away back down
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for then you're gonna you know, like it's a rollercoaster with it, and
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but yeah, anyway, I kind of sidetracked when I talked to her that
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day. I had I must I pulled a muscle in my neck and my
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arms started to flare a little bit again, and I haven't had any kind
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of a flair for so long, and I just I don't know how.
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The scariest part is, I don't know how I reach remission exactly. I
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really don't, because that was gonna be my question, and like, do
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tell the story of that, because it's hard. But I've heard other stories
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as well from people that I just talked to in the CRPS community randomly here
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and there, that they have no idea. Yeah, they're like, yeah,
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just one day I went into remission and it was like okay. And
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then they'll get a random little flare and then that fear and that anxiety creeps
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right back in and they're like, oh shit, this is it. Like
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now I'm gonna have to start all over again. And that's the crazy games
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that we play. Last you know, I always bring pain game into it
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because that's the word. That's a very specific word for my show, because
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it is a game that you're playing with you're tricking your mind. You're tricking
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yourself, You're tricking trying to trick the people around you to make them not
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feel like you feel. Yeah. Yeah, you know, like when I'm
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walking from my handicap parking space and i can barely walk, I'm like,
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do they think I'm faking? I'm not fake? You know, just it
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is a complete mind f all day long. Yeah, thinking about and managing
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this and trying to keep my beautiful smile and my stellar personality going, you
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know, and to keep on singing. Yeah, because there's a lot to
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sitting down at the piano and singing that I've kind of started to stir away
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from. Any We brought up a really good point about how good singing is
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for you and the vegas nerve stimulation, all of these things. It's just
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like I totally forgot about all of the positive things about singing, as well
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as just you know, being glorious. Yeah. Yeah, and you don't
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even And that's a thing like like distraction therapy in itself is huge because like
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you could just sit and be like, oh my god, this hurts,
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right, and then it puts your mind in your brain In this we're already
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in a peen loop. Anyway when you have crps. So if you sit
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there and just focus on like, don't you know, like it just it,
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just do something else, even it's like in the back of your mind,
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you know it hurts. Well, it's not in the back of your
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mind when you're in a flare, but it's no and I'm in a constant
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flare. I don't have flares. I'm just flare. It sucks. Yeah,
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if that's us suck, that's I Yeah, that sucks beyond. But
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here you are laughing and giggling, and you know, like but you're putting
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your energy in a good place, you know, Like so you choose to
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be you know, just vope around and give up, or you can just
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keep pushing on. But you also have I feel like you also have to
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allow yourself, like when you're just tired and you're done, Like there's there's
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got to be a balance. And I think what's different for me now is
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that I am way more aware of my limits. Like when I'm overstressed with
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something or you know, whether whatever it is, whether it's mental, physical,
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whatever, it's like, I don't take care of me, my body's
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gonna be like a few you know, like it's good, it's gonna be
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done exactly, and yeah, but I don't know, it's like part of
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me, Like, I know people tell people to do that all the time.
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I'm like, there's so many people they're they're running this fast paced hustle
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in life. Why can't my body handle it? And I almost feel bad
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for that. But then at the same time, I'm like, or was
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I just doing so much? And that's my way of like, yeah,
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no, we're not doing this. So I don't think anyone should feel guilty
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about having to take care of themselves that way. Those are all very valid
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points, especially the part about you know this self care because and it's something
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that we talk about. I am terrible at it. I'm better than I
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used to be. I have really really good months where I'm like, wow,
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Lindy, you are just rocking it in self care, and then I
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crash and burn because I'll be like, I'll have pushed myself so hard because
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I'm feeling so much better, and then I pushed myself so hard that I
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crash and burn, and then I go straight back into I can't do the
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things that I wanted to do and that I've been working towards doing and then
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you get sad, and then you get frustrated, and then you get angry,
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and then you get depressed, and then you have anxiety about it.
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And it's this that loop. I was telling my sweetie this morning, and
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I'm like, I cannot get my feet specifically out of this particular loop I'm
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in right now. Yeah, it's like intense. I'm like, I and
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I take pictures of my feet all the time, which but if my twenty
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year old self could hear me saying those words, she'd think she's crazy too.
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My phone is filled with pictures of dogs, pictures of my sleep,
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my sweetie sleeping and which is not creepy. We call him sleepers because he
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sleeps everywhere. And um, and so we've got sleeper pictures, dog pictures
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and feet pictures. That's it. Oh that's funny. Well, I can't
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meet me on the dog thing there because I think I've got I don't know
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how many literally thousands and thousands of thousands I had to buy more storage on
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my phone because they were like, yeah, sorry, yeah, I's like
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we're full, but um, but yeah, I know the self care is
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very important, and I know that it's easy to throw that phrase out,
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but it's so hard to actually focus on you, especially when you're a people
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pleaser and um, which is me all day and I know that I am,
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but like yesterday, for example, I did legit. My part of
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my CRPS is I've got like really my bones really really hurt. So it
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always feels like like I'm just skeleton anyway, but I feel like I'm I
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feel like somebody like runs Bulldozerer over me, or like drop bowling balls on
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my feet, and I just feel like I'm always buzzing with this weird heats
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and like tingly and it's not good tingle. And I feel like I've little
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worms, hot lava worms running through the veins of my legs and my feet
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all day and night. And it's just gotten the point where it's like I
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don't know how. I don't know how I show up, but you do.
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But I am I and I'm well, I'm attempting to kick but that's
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for sure. But it's just like so many things that we take for granted,
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we need to stop and when we're feeling like the world just has gotten
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us down and hurt, our bodies are hurting. That was me yesterday.
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I had to just cancel my day yesterday, just what I had to do.
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And everybody's very understanding, and it is what it is, you know.
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I'm just like, I could not form sentences yesterday, and I could
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not walk. I was only in my wheelchair, and I just I was
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like, I have to eat pot and sit on the council and that's what
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I did. So I'm just like, and because I took that instead of
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pushing my way through and getting myself even more upsets stress wise with my body
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and going, well, you can do it, lindsay, No, I
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couldn't. Astly, I could not participate in life, yes, And that's
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where and that's where like when I was doing the therapy stuff so I used
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to before the singing and before like when I was working for the fat Practice
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and had my own business. I also my husband and I ran a triathlon
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team as well. I did all sorts of all sorts of stuff and super
22:36
active. And I remember him trying to get me, He's like, you
22:40
know what you should try to Like when I was starting to feel a little
22:41
bit better, he's like, why don't you try to swim? So what
22:45
is my dumbass too? Yes, I get in the pool. I think
22:48
I only did four laps. He said, I meant go across and do
22:51
one lap. I couldn't walk for like forties. I don't like, I
22:55
don't know. Maybe it was in forties, maybe it was three days or
22:56
whatever. But I went to therapy whenever my next one was. It might
23:00
have been a day or two after. And I remember my husband he actually
23:06
left work to come and just like because they didn't know how they were going
23:10
to get me out of there. I was passing out, like literally losing
23:11
consciousness because the pain was so bad. And you know, but I'm like
23:17
in my head, I'm like, why shouldn't I be able to do this?
23:19
You know, Like I'm like that was nothing, and you know,
23:22
and it wasn't that long ago that I did it. He goes, your
23:25
body, these like things are different now, and they kept saying it's okay,
23:30
it's okay that it's different. He's like, give yourself some grace,
23:32
you know. So it's yeah, So it's there are things that you take
23:37
for granted and and I you know, and I need to remember sometimes or
23:40
like you said, you know, if you've talked to people in remission,
23:41
it's like I had that flare a couple of months ago, and it was
23:45
like or I guess only about a month and a half ago, and I'm
23:47
just trying to put it out of my brain. But it's like, you
23:49
know, yeah, it is. It is a mind game. And I
23:52
think that's why. Like when I was in therapy too, he's like,
23:55
you don't have this and I'm like, okay, yeah, I don't know.
23:56
I don't you know, and I'm like why, you know, why
23:59
did you say that to me? And then I was really not to say
24:02
bummed, but I think that was his way of kind of driving home the
24:04
point of like, you know, you've got this kind of mind over matter.
24:08
And so I did the pop thing too. I was the guy was
24:11
a total jokester and a friend of mine, but he's like, and you
24:17
need to go home and just smoke a bowl and I'm just like, okay,
24:19
whatever. And then so the therapist he goes I think he's right,
24:23
I think you do, and I was like, what you know. He's
24:26
like no, seriously, and he's like and that poor guy's wife was just
24:30
diagnosed with cancer herself, and he's like, she's going to go. You
24:33
need a medical card in Illinois at the time. You did. Yeah,
24:36
He's like, she's gonna go get her medical card. So next week I
24:40
did. I did that and he did. So we used an app called
24:45
Recognize. I don't know if you're familiar with that one, and we did
24:48
mirror mirror therapy and I thought he was crazy with that one too, and
24:52
I'm like, Okay, this isn't real therapy. But that was tricking the
24:56
brain into thinking like, yeah, your left hand can wor you know.
25:00
So it's yeah, yeah, it's all the pain game, like it totally
25:03
is because it's did it. Yeah. This is a full time job over
25:07
here for sure. Yeah, it's the longest game I've ever played. I'm
25:11
exhausted. Yeah, I know. I want almost seven years here. And
25:17
so I'm frustrated that when I first started having pain in my right big toe,
25:22
when my first toe just went yeah, we're just not gonna be working
25:26
correctly for you anymore. I wish I would have immediately gone somewhere, like
25:30
to a physical therapist, but I didn't, and then it spread to both
25:33
feet pretty quickly, and then it was like whoa, okay, and then
25:38
it's just you know, weave and its twisted sister, way up my bod.
25:41
And it's frustrating and it's exhausting, and but doing what we're doing here
25:47
is so worthwhile for me. It is my soul food. It feeds me
25:52
to see you today and to talk to you and to have met you.
25:55
And I mean all these incredible people like you mentioned earlier that are doing doing
26:00
podcasts with in relation to sharing their stories and sharing their traumas and being so
26:04
vulnerable with me and trusting me with their stories and and my my smart assness
26:08
and my depravity and what have you. You know. And I always like
26:12
to thank my listeners too, because I wouldn't be sitting here if it wasn't
26:15
for your ear holes. Yeah, so thank you for joining me and keep
26:22
listening to her. Thank you, Yes, and that is that is a
26:26
direct h thank you. That's what I met. Gosh, use your words,
26:32
Linday. Yeah. No, let's talk real quick about you and music
26:37
before we before we wrap up here. So I love your story from like
26:41
karaoke to COVID to country music, like it's so amazing. It's totally crazy.
26:45
And I love the karaoke part of it because I used to go to
26:49
karaoke all the time, Like, there was a crew of us that would
26:52
always go and it was so fun because I was always, like, you
26:56
know, one of the ringers. So it was really fun to always be
26:59
good. Yeah, get it, unless you've had a couple of drinks and
27:03
then you don't sound that great. Listened from my experience, like maybe you
27:07
shouldn't have had that vodka any more than you had already. I don't drink
27:11
that crap anymore anyways. But um So, your chart topping single was called
27:15
Falling into Nashville, and I love that because it's so happy based on your
27:19
story that you were telling about how you guys just you didn't want to fly
27:22
and you just got in your car and you just drove and you kind of
27:25
fell into Nashville. It's like, yeah, it's so cute. It's such
27:27
a wonderful song. And I know you've been working on some new materials,
27:32
so give us a little chit chat about that. Yeah. So my new
27:36
single Tonight, which if that's about, actually it's the love story between my
27:41
husband and I. I was friends with him for like five years and it
27:44
was kind of we went on dates here and there, and I knew if
27:47
I ever dated him for real our friendship was going to either end or we'd
27:51
be married. We're twenty three years married now, so well something worked.
27:56
Then, yeah, something worked, and so there's that one. Um.
28:00
And then I've got music coming out in the summer. UM, don't ever
28:06
release date just yet. UM. And that's gonna be a fun that'll be
28:08
my first like super fassy song that'll be out. UM. So I'm so
28:12
excited about that one. I'm playing a character in it and it's gonna be
28:17
just like, I don't know, a girl power kind of song. U.
28:21
So yeah, it's I'm I don't know, We've got so much.
28:23
I wrote a song It's Gosh when I was one of my last trips to
28:27
Nashville. It was I was saying, how I want to write I want
28:30
to write one for my dad, but I want it to be universal,
28:33
so every daddy daughter kind of you know, like it could just relate to
28:37
everybody. Because before I put out Falling into Nashville, I had a song
28:41
trust Me, and that's what that was the very first song I wrote with
28:44
my artist coach and um, the guy that I got the info in Nashville
28:48
from. And that's how I and he's the one who we introduced me to
28:52
my producer. And then it's just I've been so fortunate to meet so many
28:56
good people in music city. It's it's just not so I can't even wrap
29:00
my brain around the roller coaster. I'm on in a good way. I'm
29:03
happy, but I'm just like, okay, just hang on, let's go.
29:07
So yeah, buckle up, baby, buckle up. But I do
29:11
love that Falling into Nashville is the one that really kind of is the one
29:15
that hit the radio waves for the first time. It's if you listen to
29:19
the words and you know my story, you know, I literally and figuratively
29:22
fell into Nashville. But I like to use falling into Nashville is a metaphor
29:26
for falling into music because there's a song for everything, whether it's sad or
29:30
happy or angry or whatever. It is right for sure. Yeah. So,
29:33
and it's like find your souls, sing it loud, won't care who's
29:37
in the crowds, And it's basically like who cares, you know, like
29:38
I'm doing me? You know, like you do, Yeah, I'm doing
29:41
me. And then it's found my soul singing here so everyone can hear,
29:45
Like let the world hear who you are, you know, unapologetically. So
29:48
that's a song for me that's probably never I mean, I'm not gonna say
29:52
it's never gonna get old. I mean people think songs get old after a
29:55
while, probably even my own, like if you hear it too many times.
29:57
But for me, it's always going to do be this happy, happy,
30:00
happy song and I don't know that's going to ring through them by heart
30:03
forever. So and I love that, and I love the message of do
30:07
you because it really is important. And as we get older, it's obviously
30:11
easier for us, Like we always always talk to my parents. I'm like,
30:15
you know, I just don't give a shit about that stuff anymore,
30:17
you know, because as we're older, we're just like I don't care.
30:21
Yeah, yeah, what are you gonna do about them? But what are
30:22
you going to do? Work? So yeah, exactly exactly, I'm not.
30:26
I am gonna be me and that is that, and I am definitely
30:30
me on this show and I will continue to be so um. But okay,
30:33
so we can find our the sweetest little Annie on the planet at Annie
30:37
Vander music dot com, A N N I E. Vander v A n
30:41
D E R music dot com and She's on Insta as Annie Underscore Vander and
30:48
her new single dropped a few weeks ago, so be sure to check her
30:52
out and follow her on social and support her music career because it's pretty awesome.
30:56
Oh thank you girl, You're welcome. Is there anything that you'd like
31:00
to leave our listeners with before we hit the dusty trail here? Um?
31:03
Now, just like, keep your head up, stay positive and like basically
31:07
and honestly, I feel like that's you know, it's never gonna get all
31:11
For me to say it. I know it sounds cliche and whatever, but
31:14
like, just keep pushing and just keep being unapologetically. You find you in
31:18
the head games that happen with all this corrap, so you know, focus
31:22
focus on the good, right and you know, if you can't focus on
31:26
good for something else, just compliment somebody else, Just do something to make
31:30
things positive and trust me, it'll come back to you. I love it.
31:33
Yeah, Yeah, that's it. Well, it has been such a
31:37
blast with you today and listening to your sweet little voice and your beautiful smile.
31:40
So thank you for being here with us today. Thank you for having
31:42
me. It was great, It was so much fun. You are so
31:47
adorable. It's just nuts. Just pinched me. She's so cute. You
31:49
are exclusively invited to share this country music filled, graceful vip pain journey together.
31:56
Let's get to the heart of how to heal with you by my side.
32:00
Please follow the Pain Game Podcasts wherever you digest your podcast content, we
32:05
will be there. Visit us at the Pain Game podcast dot com and follow
32:08
us on all the socials. Thanks for listening to my little VIPs. Catch
32:12
you on the other side.