Latest / Crime Stories with Nancy Grace / Father blames Netflix series ’13 Reasons Why’ for daughter’s suicide
Transcript
- 0:04Speaker 1: Hey, it's Hannah. The Netflix show Thirteen Reasons Why has
- 0:08Speaker 1: been criticized for glorifying suicide because I'm about to tell
- 0:12Speaker 1: you the story of my life, more specifically, why my
- 0:15Speaker 1: Life Ended. The fictional series features a high school girl
- 0:18Speaker 1: who sends tapes to students and a teacher explaining how
- 0:21Speaker 1: they wronged her. If you're listening to this tape, you're
- 0:23Speaker 1: one of the reasons why everyone is just so nice
- 0:26Speaker 1: and so they drive you to kill yourself. This is
- 0:29Speaker 1: Crime Stories with Nancy Grace. They were just fifteen years old,
- 0:32Speaker 1: and they both took their lives just days after watching
- 0:35Speaker 1: a controversial show on Netflix, Thirteen Reasons Why I Love You.
- 0:39Speaker 1: My daughter was she was a hero. She had straight
- 0:42Speaker 1: a's and writing was her passion. She loved English, it
- 0:45Speaker 1: was her favorite class. She was going to be a writer.
- 0:47Speaker 1: Bella had been battling depression and she'd been bullied since
- 0:50Speaker 1: middle school. But in the weeks before she took her life,
- 0:52Speaker 1: she seemed happy. She was doing great. Bella Herndon, a
- 1:00Speaker 1: little sophomore in high school, absolutely beautiful, loved to read,
- 1:12Speaker 1: loved to write. Reminds me so much of my little
- 1:14Speaker 1: girl Lucy. Getting straight A's as a sophomore in high school.
- 1:22Speaker 1: Another girl, Priscilla Chu, a sophomore described as precious and determined.
- 1:31Speaker 1: Both of these little girls, Bella and Priscilla, have passed away.
- 1:37Speaker 1: They both died as a result of suicide. Both of
- 1:42Speaker 1: their families say the two little girls have been watching
- 1:47Speaker 1: Netflix's controversial news show about suicide, Thirteen Reasons Why, just
- 1:54Speaker 1: before the little girls took their own lives. Why why
- 2:00Speaker 1: is this happening? Why is that still on the air
- 2:05Speaker 1: influencing children all across our country? Why? What? What is
- 2:11Speaker 1: it ratings? Why would they keep it on after losing
- 2:18Speaker 1: Bella and Priscilla? Why? I, Nancy Grace, this is crime
- 2:23Speaker 1: stories and I don't understand why this is happening. We
- 2:29Speaker 1: recently covered this story with a mom of a little
- 2:34Speaker 1: boy out of Florida. They managed to stop his suicide.
- 2:42Speaker 1: What this show is about on Netflix is about a
- 2:49Speaker 1: team that is angry and upset and hurt about being
- 2:53Speaker 1: bullied and sends notes missives to everyone that has bullied
- 3:01Speaker 1: them and commits suicide. Then, after the teen's death, the
- 3:08Speaker 1: team becomes kind of a star. Everyone realizes what they
- 3:14Speaker 1: did wrong, how they had brought about all this pain
- 3:17Speaker 1: and suffering, and in death the child becomes the star
- 3:25Speaker 1: and gets the love and approval they wanted in life
- 3:28Speaker 1: and suicide is somehow glamorized, kind of a get back
- 3:33Speaker 1: at your bullies. That is not what children need to hear.
- 3:39Speaker 1: And joining me now is a very special guest. Bella's dad,
- 3:45Speaker 1: John Herndon is with us. Mr Herndon, I hate to
- 3:49Speaker 1: even recount any facts. I am just so sorry that
- 3:55Speaker 1: you have lost Bella. Guess me too, A, But I
- 4:01Speaker 1: see this as an opportunity, UM too, spread a word
- 4:08Speaker 1: alert of their parents, other educators, lawmakers, UM about what
- 4:14Speaker 1: this show is. It's doing to our two children, UM,
- 4:19Speaker 1: to teenagers, a very highly impressionable audience. UM. I don't
- 4:24Speaker 1: know how many lives of kids it's going to take
- 4:28Speaker 1: for Netflix to finally say enough UM. But until they
- 4:33Speaker 1: until the number gets high enough for them to manage
- 4:35Speaker 1: to them, shows like this are aren't going to help
- 4:39Speaker 1: as a venue to get the word out. Surprisingly, even
- 4:42Speaker 1: after losing two lives and nearly a third child's lives,
- 4:50Speaker 1: a season two is now in the works. We now
- 4:57Speaker 1: know that season two has been green lit. Creator Brian
- 5:01Speaker 1: Yorky out offering details to Entertainment Weekly. It starts a
- 5:09Speaker 1: number of months after the first season. The City, the
- 5:13Speaker 1: controversial Netflix series is about. It's based on the young
- 5:18Speaker 1: adult novel of the same title, and it's about a
- 5:21Speaker 1: teen girl, Hannah Baker, who commits suicide and leaves behind
- 5:25Speaker 1: audio recordings for thirteen Bullies that she says is the
- 5:31Speaker 1: reason she killed herself. And they are actually going to
- 5:36Speaker 1: a season two, even after the loss of Bella's life.
- 5:42Speaker 1: Mr Herndon, when did you learn that Bella had been
- 5:47Speaker 1: watching Netflix Thirteen Reasons Why just before she passed away.
- 5:55Speaker 1: It wasn't until the day of her funeral, but I
- 5:58Speaker 1: learned from her friends at school. They approached me and
- 6:02Speaker 1: let me know, Um Bella ahead finished watching it about
- 6:06Speaker 1: three days before she had passed away. Did Bella ever
- 6:10Speaker 1: mention her feelings? Why was she so sad? Of course,
- 6:15Speaker 1: you and I know, and with me as psychologist, a
- 6:18Speaker 1: renowned psychologist, Karen Stark, we know that there doesn't have
- 6:23Speaker 1: to be a reason for depression. It can be a
- 6:26Speaker 1: chemical imbalance, it can be just for no reason, for
- 6:29Speaker 1: no reason, we understand you are depressed and you want
- 6:33Speaker 1: to take your life. And I remember very well, John
- 6:37Speaker 1: after the murder of my fiancee. For many, many years years,
- 6:42Speaker 1: I didn't care if I lived or died. Either way
- 6:46Speaker 1: was fine with me. And I wish I had sought counseling,
- 6:51Speaker 1: but at the time I didn't. But did she ever?
- 6:57Speaker 1: Did you know that she was having suicidal feelings or
- 7:01Speaker 1: was she depressed? Uh? No, I was Me and my
- 7:05Speaker 1: wife I were aware that she was having She was
- 7:07Speaker 1: not a lot, so we didn't know that she had
- 7:10Speaker 1: suffered from depression. UM started for her back in middle
- 7:14Speaker 1: school with some bullying. But we had had her seeing
- 7:18Speaker 1: doctors and therapists over the past three and a half
- 7:21Speaker 1: to four years, trying different medications, different permutations of medication,
- 7:28Speaker 1: different different types, different titrations, and and actually you know,
- 7:34Speaker 1: for the last last year, maybe the last couple of years,
- 7:38Speaker 1: she was very much getting better. Um. She was much happier. Um,
- 7:44Speaker 1: she developed some very good friendships, people that she brought
- 7:48Speaker 1: over to the house. Um. She was more energetic, more engaging.
- 7:55Speaker 1: She was my little girl again. Why was she being bullied? John? What? What?
- 7:59Speaker 1: Why were bullies bothering her? A lot of us, like
- 8:03Speaker 1: many of us, you know, when we have experiences with bullies,
- 8:06Speaker 1: we you know, try to you know you'd fell but
- 8:09Speaker 1: dislike a distaste for bullies. When you know the kids
- 8:12Speaker 1: were young. Um, I would teach them, you know that
- 8:17Speaker 1: what a hero meant. You know, I would show them,
- 8:21Speaker 1: you know, them interested in me about Superman and things
- 8:24Speaker 1: like that, you know, to show him what a hero
- 8:26Speaker 1: could stand for. And I would always tell them that,
- 8:29Speaker 1: you know, a hero fights for those who cannot fight
- 8:32Speaker 1: for themselves. I were always telling me, if you guys
- 8:36Speaker 1: see a bully, try and stop it, you know, intervene,
- 8:40Speaker 1: get a teacher something. Why were they tach well, I'll
- 8:48Speaker 1: tell you, Bella, stop these three girls from kicking this
- 8:52Speaker 1: boy in the head. Um as he was long on
- 8:55Speaker 1: the ground. I don't know why they were doing that
- 8:58Speaker 1: to him, but these three girls turned around and tortured off.
- 9:01Speaker 1: In the next six months. Um, I couldn't threaten the
- 9:05Speaker 1: school to get involved and intervene. They just simply refused
- 9:10Speaker 1: to act. They called it a disagreement of friends. After
- 9:14Speaker 1: six months and you know, the kids either a lot
- 9:17Speaker 1: of interest or went away. But there was a lot
- 9:19Speaker 1: of damage that was done. You know, I believe that
- 9:22Speaker 1: Bella's depressionally started from that. You know, that reminds me
- 9:26Speaker 1: of something that happened in high school. We had a
- 9:28Speaker 1: girl in high school and her first name was Earle,
- 9:33Speaker 1: and I guess because she dressed fashion forward, people picked
- 9:39Speaker 1: on her all the time. It was actually the main girls,
- 9:43Speaker 1: and recently, John, I would say, in the last couple
- 9:49Speaker 1: of years, out of the blue, I heard from Earle
- 9:53Speaker 1: and I had not seen her since high school. She said,
- 9:55Speaker 1: do you remember the day? And she named three of
- 9:58Speaker 1: the main girls, and I remember them very well. We're
- 10:03Speaker 1: making fun of her, and she said, and you said,
- 10:06Speaker 1: you leave her alone. I don't even remember doing that,
- 10:10Speaker 1: but I do remember that those three girls bullied me
- 10:14Speaker 1: for the rest of high school and made fun of everything,
- 10:20Speaker 1: made fun of my sister and made fun of me,
- 10:22Speaker 1: made fun of blah blah blah blah blah. And I'm
- 10:25Speaker 1: sure I gave them plenty of fodder to man, But
- 10:29Speaker 1: that's funny. That just triggered that memory. I haven't thought
- 10:32Speaker 1: of that in years, and I don't believe I ever
- 10:37Speaker 1: once mentioned it to my parents. I never looking, but
- 10:41Speaker 1: I never thought too. I mean, I just didn't you
- 10:45Speaker 1: have stated, John, that you believe thirteen reasons why the
- 10:50Speaker 1: new Netflix. I didn't even say it hit creates a
- 10:54Speaker 1: perception that there is no way out of your bad situation,
- 10:58Speaker 1: that there is no alternative, that the main character looks
- 11:04Speaker 1: to people is turned away, and it creates a series
- 11:08Speaker 1: of events that lead to a very black and white
- 11:10Speaker 1: outcome that all you can do is take your own life.
- 11:13Speaker 1: They're in high school, for Pete's sake, their life has
- 11:16Speaker 1: barely started, John uh So, It's basically what it does
- 11:20Speaker 1: is it provides a blueprint, um for of course of action.
- 11:25Speaker 1: You know, it's very tragic to see someone makes such
- 11:31Speaker 1: a decision with such finality, who has so much promise,
- 11:36Speaker 1: things that were so uh there were so many things,
- 11:40Speaker 1: good things ahead for her, and she felt that, you know,
- 11:43Speaker 1: these these people that you know aren't going to matter
- 11:46Speaker 1: to her in the slightest in the future, have such
- 11:49Speaker 1: an impact on her life that their opinion matters so
- 11:52Speaker 1: greatly that she just can't live without it. Unfortunately, you know,
- 11:57Speaker 1: we we tend to forget as adults how much the
- 12:01Speaker 1: environment that we're in in high school becomes our entire world.
- 12:07Speaker 1: Sit around with a group of people, an environment like
- 12:10Speaker 1: that for you know, a third of your day, um
- 12:14Speaker 1: and you know, we, like I said, as adults, we
- 12:16Speaker 1: tend to forget how much significance that can that can
- 12:19Speaker 1: have for us. But it's is unfortunate that the makers
- 12:25Speaker 1: of the show, including the former Disney star Selena Gomez,
- 12:30Speaker 1: decided to paint her choices um in such black and
- 12:37Speaker 1: white and drastic terms. There was, you know, no way out,
- 12:43Speaker 1: no other courses of action this girl could take. You know, Uh,
- 12:48Speaker 1: for example, you know, I couldn't couldn't seek help from
- 12:51Speaker 1: her parents, you know, couldn't change schools, couldn't, um, you know,
- 12:55Speaker 1: any one of a hundred things, very common things that
- 12:58Speaker 1: parents would do to interview on behalf of their kids.
- 13:02Speaker 1: None of those things were explored. And I think it
- 13:05Speaker 1: was done in a very deliberate, a very way to
- 13:09Speaker 1: target that very segment of the population that Selena Gomez
- 13:15Speaker 1: calls her fan base. UM. It was done to target
- 13:19Speaker 1: teenagers because they are so highly impressionable. Um. You know,
- 13:25Speaker 1: it wouldn't be the first company that tried to reinvent
- 13:28Speaker 1: itself by targeting a new or a younger segment of
- 13:31Speaker 1: the market, but in this case, they are trying to
- 13:35Speaker 1: just completely target a group of people who simply don't
- 13:40Speaker 1: have the tools to combat a message like that that
- 13:44Speaker 1: we adults do their children. You know. Karen Start, a
- 13:49Speaker 1: renowned psychologist joining us out of New York. Karen that
- 13:54Speaker 1: the premise of thirteen Reasons Why, Reasons Why the rest
- 13:59Speaker 1: of that so does this commit suicide. The girl Hannah,
- 14:04Speaker 1: which is a made up character, sends videos I think
- 14:10Speaker 1: it is to all of her bullies and they have
- 14:12Speaker 1: an awakening and epiphany. That's not how it works in
- 14:16Speaker 1: real life. Bullies never really get that they're bullies. You know,
- 14:22Speaker 1: they don't. I mean, it's like a snake. It crawls
- 14:26Speaker 1: on its belly and it thinks it's a king. It
- 14:28Speaker 1: doesn't get it, and they don't understand it. Nancy. The
- 14:31Speaker 1: show has many problems, and that happens to be one
- 14:35Speaker 1: of them. I think, as Mr Hendon said, and I
- 14:39Speaker 1: want to say, I'm very sorry about your daughter. Um
- 14:42Speaker 1: it doesn't depict any alternatives, and that's huge because it
- 14:48Speaker 1: also doesn't identify the fact that there's mental illness here.
- 14:53Speaker 1: She's very depressed girl and she should have many alternatives.
- 14:58Speaker 1: They show her going to accounts it and the counselor
- 15:01Speaker 1: and she's trying to tell about a rape and the
- 15:04Speaker 1: counselor is not immediately jumping to her defense, offering support,
- 15:10Speaker 1: and in reality, this is something the counsel would have
- 15:13Speaker 1: to report to the authorities. They don't deal with that either.
- 15:18Speaker 1: So it's as though she has no choice but to
- 15:22Speaker 1: commit suicide. And it also turns her into a popular girl.
- 15:26Speaker 1: Everybody grieves, everyone mourns her, and it and it really
- 15:31Speaker 1: does act as though this was the reason why she
- 15:35Speaker 1: killed herself because no one understood her and they bullied her.
- 15:40Speaker 1: It ignores the fact that there was an underlying depression,
- 15:43Speaker 1: and it makes it way too powerful for the individuals involved.
- 15:48Speaker 1: There's so much that goes into teen suicide that's not
- 15:51Speaker 1: being addressed, and it's dangerous in that way. They could
- 15:55Speaker 1: have done a much better job. The National Suicide Prevention
- 15:59Speaker 1: Lifeline is one eight hundred two seven three talk one
- 16:04Speaker 1: hundred two seven three eight to five five, Or to
- 16:08Speaker 1: make it even easier, you can text the word talk
- 16:12Speaker 1: t a l K two seven four one dash seven
- 16:17Speaker 1: for one. Wouldn't it have been something, Nancy, if they
- 16:20Speaker 1: had had an announcement that just like what you just
- 16:23Speaker 1: made on that show, if they would break into it
- 16:26Speaker 1: and even say that, yeah, I wonder why not? And
- 16:30Speaker 1: even after these two deaths, Priscilla and Bella and the
- 16:36Speaker 1: little boy. But see, we kept his mom's name and
- 16:40Speaker 1: his name secret. We did not reveal that. But even
- 16:45Speaker 1: after that, it's still gonna be Greenland. It is Greenland
- 16:49Speaker 1: for a second season. Karen, I don't understand that. Well,
- 16:52Speaker 1: what they're doing is they're gonna they said they're going
- 16:55Speaker 1: to have their warning be much stronger, and they show
- 16:59Speaker 1: some kind of um teen suicide prevention prior to the show,
- 17:05Speaker 1: But that still doesn't make sense to me that they
- 17:07Speaker 1: won't inject it into the show. What would be wrong
- 17:11Speaker 1: with stopping the show while the show is actually running
- 17:15Speaker 1: and saying, we want you to watch this, We don't
- 17:18Speaker 1: want you to get the wrong idea. And because teenagers
- 17:22Speaker 1: are so impressionable, the fact that they are showing this
- 17:25Speaker 1: depiction of her committing and it's very graphic suicide, it
- 17:29Speaker 1: gives it can actually give them an away out and ideas.
- 17:35Speaker 1: No one is remembering that they their brain is not
- 17:39Speaker 1: fully developed, and they're impressionable, and they really in a
- 17:44Speaker 1: situation where they feel they have no way out. This
- 17:47Speaker 1: show is saying, well, here's something that you can do,
- 17:50Speaker 1: and everyone will regret what happened. You know what Karen,
- 17:55Speaker 1: it's almost like a get back at your bullies. I'm
- 17:58Speaker 1: looking at a picture, a photo right now of Bella
- 18:02Speaker 1: Herndon and her father John, and they are dancing and
- 18:08Speaker 1: it you know, karabout dad passed away about a year
- 18:12Speaker 1: and a half ago, and I remember him teaching me
- 18:16Speaker 1: to dance and I would we would turn on the stereo,
- 18:20Speaker 1: which was a big, huge, honking piece of furniture back then,
- 18:24Speaker 1: with a big album of Perry Como, and I would
- 18:30Speaker 1: get on his feet and we would dance in the
- 18:32Speaker 1: living room. I'm glad you had that memory. But your
- 18:35Speaker 1: dad was a wonderful person and I'm so happy that
- 18:39Speaker 1: I had a chance to know him. Yeah you did.
- 18:42Speaker 1: And Mr Herndon, I'm looking at this picture and thinking
- 18:45Speaker 1: about you and Bella. Can you tell me when is
- 18:49Speaker 1: it that you miss her the most? Every day? I
- 18:54Speaker 1: miss it the most every day when I i morning,
- 18:58Speaker 1: I look at her picture her and I you know,
- 19:03Speaker 1: I just walk by and sad. I miss you, baby,
- 19:06Speaker 1: I love you, And it's every day is hard. There
- 19:12Speaker 1: is no time in the day where it lessens. There's
- 19:15Speaker 1: no time in the day where the impact is not
- 19:17Speaker 1: felt so much. Um, I miss her every day what
- 19:23Speaker 1: did she want to be when she grew up? Because
- 19:25Speaker 1: she wanted to be a writer. She was so passionate
- 19:28Speaker 1: about writing. She loved she loved reading. She was reading
- 19:35Speaker 1: Stephen King's In the Eyes of the Dragon, which is
- 19:38Speaker 1: a story that he wrote for his daughter. Um. She read.
- 19:43Speaker 1: She was starting to get into Hemingway. She was reading
- 19:46Speaker 1: The Great Gatsby. She was reading, she was reading the
- 19:55Speaker 1: the stories about the Hunger Games. She was reading no stories. Um.
- 20:00Speaker 1: She read a lot of Greek mythology, labors of Hercules. Wow. That. Yeah,
- 20:10Speaker 1: she loved to read. She read voraciously. Anything that really
- 20:16Speaker 1: just kind of struck her interest. You so much of
- 20:21Speaker 1: my daughter, Lucy. She reads all the time. She already
- 20:25Speaker 1: writes little poems and little short stories. And I just
- 20:33Speaker 1: can't imagine what you've gone through. It's like a light
- 20:36Speaker 1: goes off and it will never come back on. Yeah. Yeah,
- 20:42Speaker 1: that the Bella was Bella was pretty amazing to me. Um.
- 20:49Speaker 1: She was my firstborn. She was my you know, my
- 20:51Speaker 1: first baby. Um. Um miss her till the day I die.
- 20:58Speaker 1: None of this makes any sense to either my wife,
- 21:02Speaker 1: her Brother's on myself just a senseless act and has
- 21:07Speaker 1: no meaning. Mr Herndon John Herndon is not asking for
- 21:14Speaker 1: some type of boycott on Netflix. That's not what he's saying,
- 21:19Speaker 1: even though he believes their new hit series Thirteen Reasons
- 21:25Speaker 1: triggered his little girl's death. But what he is advocating
- 21:31Speaker 1: and hopes is that they will make a change, that
- 21:36Speaker 1: they will take the show off the air, that they
- 21:38Speaker 1: will advance suicide awareness, that parents and teachers just citizens.
- 21:47Speaker 1: If you care to reach out to Netflix in any
- 21:51Speaker 1: way to express that, and he says he will do
- 21:56Speaker 1: anything and everything to make sure this does not happen
- 22:00Speaker 1: to another family and Netflix, please hear us today. We
- 22:06Speaker 1: are not calling for a boycott. We're asking for you
- 22:12Speaker 1: to hear us and please take this show off the air.
- 22:19Speaker 1: It's not worth it. I don't care how much money
- 22:22Speaker 1: you're making, it's not worth it. Mr Herndon, You will
- 22:28Speaker 1: stay in my prayers of me and my family. Nancy
- 22:32Speaker 1: Gray's Crime Stories signing off, goodbye friend. M