Latest / The Big Cunty Couch / Jockstraps On The Couch w/ Eric Williams | TBCC Ep. 24

Transcript

Jockstraps On The Couch w/ Eric Williams | TBCC Ep. 24 · The Big Cunty Couch

0:00
SPEAKER_01: Coming up on the big country couch.
0:02
SPEAKER_01: He's definitely gonna like breast her eyes in for for not playing it cool.
0:06
SPEAKER_01: Not the drag queen hating woman.
0:08
SPEAKER_01: I just got off the plane with a tuba chopstick in a dream.
0:12
SPEAKER_01: Look at this.
0:13
SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, first jock on the couch.
0:16
SPEAKER_01: Stick around.
0:26
SPEAKER_02: Bulge and pantyjack.
0:28
SPEAKER_01: Gorgeous.
0:29
SPEAKER_01: This panty.
0:30
SPEAKER_01: That panty.
0:31
SPEAKER_01: Tell the story.
0:32
SPEAKER_01: It's I think for biological females that I had to have um taken out.
0:37
SPEAKER_01: I had um you had it sidestraped added.
0:40
SPEAKER_01: Because I was like, you know what, I just really need it.
0:42
SPEAKER_01: It's giving like, it's giving my sister's prom dress to be honest.
0:45
SPEAKER_01: It's like Pink Paisley uh sequid panty.
0:49
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
0:50
SPEAKER_02: What who what woman would ever be like, that's the one that I need tonight?
0:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
0:54
SPEAKER_02: Me.
0:54
SPEAKER_02: I really needed it.
0:55
SPEAKER_02: I got it, I got it uh tailored, altered to my to my big, big uh man body.
1:00
SPEAKER_02: When you take things to the tailor, is does he still think that it's for like your wife?
1:04
SPEAKER_01: No, I don't know.
1:05
SPEAKER_01: I maybe he thinks I have like I do costumes for local theater.
1:09
SPEAKER_02: Because didn't you say he was like, the woman should like this?
1:12
SPEAKER_02: No, what was that from?
1:13
SPEAKER_01: Oh, no, that was when I got my shoes altered.
1:16
SPEAKER_01: Oh they were like, we don't want to take it down as far as you're saying because uh she might.
1:20
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, oddly enough, I'm right here with her, and I think she's gonna be okay.
1:24
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, she's she likes it.
1:26
SPEAKER_01: We love to customize uh my drag instead of paying for uh drag that fits me.
1:31
SPEAKER_01: Right, just uh that's my process.
1:33
SPEAKER_01: The result is something different.
1:35
SPEAKER_02: Every time.
1:36
SPEAKER_02: Drawing.
1:36
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
1:37
SPEAKER_02: How are you?
1:37
SPEAKER_02: Good, how are you?
1:39
SPEAKER_02: Who the hell are you?
1:39
SPEAKER_02: Why don't you introduce yourself for a while?
1:42
SPEAKER_02: And I'm Mike Fails, and this is the Big County Couch.
1:45
SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited for our guest today.
1:46
SPEAKER_02: Me too.
1:47
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god.
1:47
SPEAKER_02: It's been a second since we recorded.
1:49
SPEAKER_02: Well, it's been a second since we recorded, but we've seen each other maybe like every day for the last week, which is kind of like Yeah, you've been going out.
1:55
SPEAKER_02: I have been going out.
1:56
SPEAKER_02: Which is crazy.
1:58
SPEAKER_02: How has it been for you?
1:59
SPEAKER_02: Fine.
2:00
SPEAKER_02: It's just been fine.
2:01
SPEAKER_02: Me being with you has been fine.
2:02
SPEAKER_01: Oh, it's been fun seeing you out.
2:05
SPEAKER_01: But I don't know.
2:06
SPEAKER_01: We're kind of like a bad duo in the sense that like we either have to get blackout and end up, I don't know, making it screaming and fighting and kicking.
2:13
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's gonna end up in a fight, or we have to kind of like behave in a weird way.
2:16
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, which is why we kind of left early the other night.
2:19
SPEAKER_01: We'll we'll get to that.
2:20
SPEAKER_01: We did, we did, we did.
2:21
SPEAKER_02: But may I ask, who are you wearing and what is your problem?
2:24
SPEAKER_02: Of course.
2:24
SPEAKER_02: Um, I'm wearing sort of a grab bag, it's sort of like um grab bag soup uh today.
2:29
SPEAKER_01: Yes, sorry.
2:29
SPEAKER_01: I feel like I kind of like pulled the rug under you by switching my outfit.
2:32
SPEAKER_02: Because you were gonna wear a brown story and we went with pink instead for Yeah, I was like, you know what?
2:38
SPEAKER_01: It's gonna be 85.
2:39
SPEAKER_01: Maybe I shouldn't wear a vinyl long sleeve dress.
2:43
SPEAKER_01: It's like, is there in July?
2:44
SPEAKER_02: Is there any drag that is breathable though?
2:46
SPEAKER_02: It's like, no, but I run a thousand degrees.
2:48
SPEAKER_02: Wait, I wonder, could you make like hip pads that had like cutouts in them, like circles?
2:53
SPEAKER_02: Fans.
2:53
SPEAKER_02: Where just look like giants?
2:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
2:55
SPEAKER_02: What do you think these are?
2:56
SPEAKER_02: Just look like giant um cellulite like divots.
2:59
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, going for a textured look on the sides.
3:01
SPEAKER_02: Um, I don't know what the hell I'm wearing.
3:02
SPEAKER_02: I think this is um, I think this is Armani, uh, white button down.
3:05
SPEAKER_02: I don't know what the hell these pants are.
3:06
SPEAKER_02: I wore them to Sam and Misha's wedding cocktail hour.
3:10
SPEAKER_02: And then this is a hideous pink tea, I would say.
3:13
SPEAKER_02: It's hideous pink.
3:14
SPEAKER_01: It is, but I mean, it kind of is an exact slide of the couch.
3:17
SPEAKER_02: No, because this is like this is still in like bubblegum realm.
3:20
SPEAKER_02: This is like magenta.
3:21
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you might not like this playing back at camera when you see.
3:24
SPEAKER_01: Because it's kind of getting exact, exact.
3:25
SPEAKER_01: But I know what you mean.
3:26
SPEAKER_01: I know what you mean.
3:26
SPEAKER_01: It's kind of it's it's a little bit more headache pink.
3:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
3:30
SPEAKER_02: Um, yeah, so that's what I'm wearing.
3:31
SPEAKER_02: It's whatever.
3:32
SPEAKER_02: And uh my problem, okay.
3:34
SPEAKER_02: So I walked into Lowe's to get batteries, and imagine what was what did I see as soon as I walked in?
3:40
SPEAKER_02: Just guess.
3:40
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
3:41
SPEAKER_02: Halloween installation.
3:42
SPEAKER_02: That's not okay.
3:43
SPEAKER_02: That's not okay.
3:44
SPEAKER_02: No, no, no.
3:45
SPEAKER_02: That terrified me.
3:46
SPEAKER_02: That shook me to my core.
3:46
SPEAKER_02: I was like, this is too soon.
3:48
SPEAKER_01: And after the fourth, I'm ready for the CC Pumpkins.
3:50
SPEAKER_01: That's candy corn pumpkins.
3:51
SPEAKER_02: Crazy.
3:52
SPEAKER_01: I got cracks.
3:53
SPEAKER_01: It's crazy.
3:53
SPEAKER_01: I know you can't, it's kind of rude to skip over Apple season.
3:56
SPEAKER_01: September gets like one tiny window.
3:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I guess Lowe's famously does a huge Apple Apple story.
4:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, activation.
4:01
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
4:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
4:02
SPEAKER_02: Uh, and who are you wearing and what is your problem?
4:04
SPEAKER_01: This is by someone called Nadine Murabi.
4:07
SPEAKER_01: Someone, yeah.
4:07
SPEAKER_01: Which sounds like um a character on ingest like that.
4:10
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
4:10
SPEAKER_01: You know, it sounds like kind of a fake name.
4:12
SPEAKER_01: Yes, it does.
4:13
SPEAKER_01: But it's Nadine Murabi.
4:14
SPEAKER_01: And um I wore it before, actually.
4:16
SPEAKER_01: I don't like to repeat outfits, as you all know.
4:18
SPEAKER_01: She's archival, but we did um delete that episode.
4:20
SPEAKER_01: So because we did, I was like, ooh, okay, this is cool.
4:23
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
4:23
SPEAKER_01: I guess as I'm dripping, I have like the gym class mustache of beads, beaded sweat.
4:28
SPEAKER_01: Um, and my problem, yeah, I guess maybe I'm I'm running really, really hot.
4:32
SPEAKER_01: I upped my Zoloff.
4:33
SPEAKER_01: Right, right, right.
4:34
SPEAKER_01: Which is never good.
4:35
SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's good for my brain, but um one, I'm it's I'm retaining water, which is so cool to talk about.
4:43
SPEAKER_01: But um, it gives me the Kamora Lee lines in my neck.
4:47
SPEAKER_01: For those of you who don't know, back in the day, uh, she has since got it fixed.
4:50
SPEAKER_01: But back in the day when Kamura was on Life in the Fab Lane, maybe on was it, VH1, uh, she used to struggle with necklines.
4:57
SPEAKER_02: So much so that famously Juju B, when she played her on the very first snatch game, just drew lines on her neck as sort of like a really um rude interpretation of a character.
5:06
SPEAKER_01: Uh reference.
5:06
SPEAKER_01: And and those are deep cuts in her in her neck.
5:09
SPEAKER_01: Um, but yeah, I'm noticing them, which is so cool.
5:13
SPEAKER_01: So yeah, I have the Kimura neck.
5:15
SPEAKER_01: It's always great to point it out uh to the entire audience.
5:18
SPEAKER_01: That's a real idea.
5:19
SPEAKER_01: Our audience of 10.
5:19
SPEAKER_01: I'm raw, vulnerable right now.
5:21
SPEAKER_01: So yeah, that's my problem.
5:22
SPEAKER_01: I'm swollen and slow and hot and and sweating.
5:26
SPEAKER_02: You don't look swollen.
5:28
SPEAKER_02: Uh you I will I will say you do look hot, but that's just because I'm only four feet away from you.
5:32
SPEAKER_02: Um but uh what about the hair?
5:34
SPEAKER_01: The hair?
5:35
SPEAKER_02: The hair's archival too.
5:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I I'm used I'm pointing out all my flaws.
5:40
SPEAKER_01: But I used my boyfriend today, and what I learned today is wow, I'm a lot bald than I was maybe the last time I wore this wig.
5:46
SPEAKER_01: I was like, where's the hair?
5:48
SPEAKER_01: But the reason why I do that is because the design of the wig is so psychotically forward.
5:53
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it it's not cool, and it looks it I get so manly with that for whatever reason.
5:58
SPEAKER_01: But if you just push it back one little Woo, she's a woman.
6:02
SPEAKER_02: And uh what else?
6:03
SPEAKER_02: What else?
6:03
SPEAKER_02: What else?
6:04
SPEAKER_02: Did you have a weak and gay?
6:05
SPEAKER_02: Anything gay happened to you recently?
6:07
SPEAKER_02: Oh, the cold play concert.
6:09
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, the cold play thing.
6:13
SPEAKER_01: How do you how do you feel about it?
6:15
SPEAKER_01: I think it's h like hilarious.
6:17
SPEAKER_01: I feel that I feel bad in a word.
6:19
SPEAKER_02: I feel really bad.
6:20
SPEAKER_02: And that's the type of thing that like maybe a few years ago, it would give me such bad secondhand embarrassment, I would kill myself for some reason.
6:27
SPEAKER_02: But now, because of all the recent trauma, I'm sort of numb, so I'm like, that sucks.
6:30
SPEAKER_02: But I think it's so that really sucks.
6:33
SPEAKER_02: I mean you play with fire.
6:35
SPEAKER_02: I know, I mean you play with fire and then you get burned, but this is like you play with fire and then you get detonated by a nuclear bomb.
6:41
SPEAKER_01: Like he's entire life.
6:46
SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
6:46
SPEAKER_01: He kind of blew it first.
6:48
SPEAKER_02: Well, I mean, yeah, but then he was like, Let me let me literally duck and hide, duck and cover.
6:52
SPEAKER_01: Not the drag queen hating woman.
6:54
SPEAKER_01: Um yeah, he is the ultimate puss in that the duck, the duck of 2025.
7:00
SPEAKER_01: Crazy.
7:01
SPEAKER_01: I mean it's like, buddy, I don't know if you're ready to be breaking rules like this if you're gonna duck.
7:06
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
7:07
SPEAKER_01: What would you just like held her and be like, don't move a muscle?
7:11
SPEAKER_01: I can't say, but I think the move would be to maybe see it before her, or if she saw it, like to just wave, like to just fly the guy off you uh off of her, or or he needs to shoot her forward over the ledge.
7:26
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
7:27
SPEAKER_01: And just like wave or something.
7:29
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
7:30
SPEAKER_01: It's like a horrible accident that classic a classic play.
7:32
SPEAKER_01: Cool.
7:33
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
7:34
SPEAKER_01: But I mean, that's really hard and impossible.
7:35
SPEAKER_01: But also, why do you go to a cold play concert?
7:37
SPEAKER_02: Well, if you're trying to be like I guess they thought maybe the box is like private and like, you know, they wouldn't point the camera up there, but hey, celebs and execs, yeah.
7:46
SPEAKER_02: Nowhere safe anymore.
7:47
SPEAKER_02: The Megatron is still uh The Jumbotron.
7:49
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
7:50
SPEAKER_02: Megatron is the villain from Transformers.
7:52
SPEAKER_02: Well, he was there too.
7:54
SPEAKER_01: And he's cheating on me.
7:56
SPEAKER_02: I don't think a Jumbotron has ever done worse.
8:00
SPEAKER_02: I feel bad.
8:01
SPEAKER_02: His wife might be happy uh if there was no prenup.
8:03
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
8:03
SPEAKER_02: The woman will be fired and they already are, it's done, it's over.
8:06
SPEAKER_01: She's fired?
8:07
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
8:08
SPEAKER_01: The company's gone.
8:09
SPEAKER_01: They liquidated everything.
8:10
SPEAKER_01: Um, including uh Coldplay.
8:12
SPEAKER_01: But um we also went to our guests' show.
8:17
SPEAKER_02: Yes, we did, yes, we did.
8:18
SPEAKER_01: And then yeah, we went out afterwards and we went to Balcone.
8:21
SPEAKER_02: We went to Balcone, and which when we got there, it was you know very sparsely populated, which is usually our preference for anything, any kind of gay bar.
8:30
SPEAKER_02: And there were two uh queens that were performing and they did an amazing job.
8:33
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it was giving local like uh suburban bar, which we love.
8:36
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and they were they were one of them was singing live and she sang Sex on Fire by Kings of Leon and it like blew my mind.
8:42
SPEAKER_02: I literally was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, jizzing my pants.
8:44
SPEAKER_02: It was I've been listening to it nonstop ever since.
8:46
SPEAKER_02: I've been like, wow, embarrassing.
8:47
SPEAKER_01: But it was she killed it, she slayed.
8:49
SPEAKER_01: It was amazing.
8:49
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, that's on the fucking big uh Kings of Leon Leon head.
8:52
SPEAKER_01: No, I mean neither.
8:53
unknown: Yeah.
8:54
SPEAKER_02: Wow.
8:55
SPEAKER_02: Um, but then uh it started to get more and more populated with like, I guess, Hell's Kitchen gays or like midtown gays or because it became burlesque.
9:02
SPEAKER_02: It became burlesque, which uh I was like, well, surely this must become like a dance party or like a sex party.
9:10
SPEAKER_02: No, but it just became more and more male burlesque numbers and more and more hot guys just there to what watch it.
9:16
SPEAKER_02: Well, I was like, why are these guys supporting the arts in Manhattan?
9:20
SPEAKER_02: Like, where are the Brooklyn gays?
9:21
SPEAKER_02: Like, you know what?
9:22
SPEAKER_01: We've been running from boy lesque for a while.
9:26
SPEAKER_01: But I have to say, it was uh pretty good.
9:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
9:29
SPEAKER_01: Even though we only stayed for one number.
9:31
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
9:31
SPEAKER_01: Which I have to say actually is really insane because it was pretty good what we saw.
9:36
SPEAKER_01: And then we were like, let's go, you want to get out of here?
9:38
SPEAKER_01: And I the only reason why I said yes was because I really wanted a cigarette.
9:41
SPEAKER_01: So I was like, Yeah, let's go.
9:42
SPEAKER_01: But you know what I mean?
9:43
SPEAKER_01: It's kind of actually crazy to see one number that was kind of hot and then be like, Yeah, well, let's get out of here.
9:47
SPEAKER_01: But it was getting so crowded.
9:48
SPEAKER_02: I know, but it was getting so crazy in there.
9:50
SPEAKER_02: It wasn't fun to like sit and watch anymore.
9:51
SPEAKER_02: Like, what was gonna happen?
9:52
SPEAKER_02: Like, they were gonna like the the dancers were gonna get pushed off the stage by the patrons.
9:56
SPEAKER_02: I don't know, maybe we would have saw some dongs.
9:58
SPEAKER_02: I kind of saw a little bit of sack.
10:00
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it was getting exciting.
10:01
SPEAKER_01: I have to say, I'm a uh uh burlesque fan now.
10:04
SPEAKER_01: I was turned.
10:05
SPEAKER_01: And then uh last but not least, we went to McDonald's, which Mike got Chicken Select and didn't realize that they haven't been um available since 2013.
10:16
SPEAKER_01: How?
10:16
SPEAKER_01: So I screamed, I was like, oh my god, the new chicken selects.
10:19
SPEAKER_01: Wow, you should be vlogging this every white.
10:21
SPEAKER_01: But uh he the guy didn't know how they okay, but why do you like why am I supposed to know what's on the McDonald's menu?
10:28
SPEAKER_02: I probably haven't had McDonald's since 2013.
10:30
SPEAKER_01: Like you gotta, I you gotta watch the news.
10:33
SPEAKER_02: Are you like you're getting like uh the local like McDonald's like the hamburglers newsletter?
10:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, his substack that's like, hey, guess what?
10:41
SPEAKER_02: It's coming back.
10:42
SPEAKER_02: I know like sometimes when the McRib is back, I didn't even realize why would they take Select?
10:46
SPEAKER_01: I know you have an alarm and the McRib fucking comes back.
10:48
SPEAKER_01: But uh yeah, selects have been gone for years and years and years and they're back.
10:51
SPEAKER_01: That's been kind of buzzy in the fast food um world.
10:54
SPEAKER_01: Well, they were worse.
10:55
SPEAKER_02: A huge part of it.
10:56
SPEAKER_02: To be fair, they were worse than uh, I guess I'm a pillar in the fast food community.
11:00
SPEAKER_02: You can't tell.
11:01
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
11:01
SPEAKER_02: Did it get worse?
11:02
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:03
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
11:03
SPEAKER_02: They were giving like um floppy.
11:05
SPEAKER_02: I heard they're floppy.
11:05
SPEAKER_02: They sort of they're limp.
11:07
SPEAKER_02: Well, you know all about that.
11:07
SPEAKER_02: And anything else we can gain?
11:09
SPEAKER_02: I guess drag race ended again.
11:11
SPEAKER_02: Um All Stars 10 is over.
11:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, really kind of they were going so up and then it kind of went so down.
11:18
SPEAKER_01: But yeah, just when they um win back the fan base by doing something different, yeah.
11:23
SPEAKER_01: Because it's been so so stale.
11:25
SPEAKER_01: Then the second half of it was so produced and predictable, and no one wanted Ginger Binge to win, but she did.
11:30
SPEAKER_01: Wait, also really quick, sorry.
11:31
SPEAKER_01: Cause I'm track race is so stupid because of what had because of ginger winning, but just like that.
11:36
SPEAKER_01: No, that's not stupid.
11:38
SPEAKER_01: That's uh cooler to talk about, maybe.
11:40
SPEAKER_02: I first of all, I need to know like why like what is happening with me psychologically that like I like the season now.
11:45
SPEAKER_02: But then also like Yeah, that's scary.
11:47
SPEAKER_02: But I I'm liking it more and more, but I I can like clinically see that it is worse than ever.
11:53
SPEAKER_02: Like this episode was 33 minutes long.
11:56
SPEAKER_02: Every single other episode this season has been 40 to 45 minutes long.
11:59
SPEAKER_02: They cut uh a ch a 10 10 minutes out of the episode.
12:02
SPEAKER_02: Like, why?
12:03
SPEAKER_02: I did notice that too.
12:04
SPEAKER_02: So is it safe to say it left you wanting more?
12:07
SPEAKER_02: No.
12:07
SPEAKER_02: I mean it left me confused.
12:08
SPEAKER_02: I was like, it's over now.
12:10
SPEAKER_02: Also, like I've been noticing a few times, it feels like they are doing this thing where they like are writing an event and kind of like working backwards to make sense of it, like uh Charlotte's uh vertigo.
12:20
SPEAKER_02: She's to be killed off.
12:21
SPEAKER_01: I'm sorry, I can't take it.
12:22
SPEAKER_01: She used to be killed off.
12:23
SPEAKER_01: Lisa, her friend, who like, did you see like people called out that her dad died twice?
12:28
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:28
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
12:29
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
12:30
SPEAKER_02: So funny.
12:30
SPEAKER_01: I really think they should make her a compulsive liar.
12:32
SPEAKER_01: That would be fun.
12:33
SPEAKER_01: Because that would be like fun, you know what I mean?
12:34
SPEAKER_01: Like, why not?
12:35
SPEAKER_01: And then Aiden, I think they should have him dabble a little bit in like cross-dressing.
12:41
SPEAKER_01: Kind of like that high maintenance episode, like a little like slip dress, carries mules, but not because he wants to, because he's trying to keep up with the times.
12:49
SPEAKER_01: Wouldn't that be funny if he just was like dabbling in CDs?
12:52
SPEAKER_01: Literally.
12:53
SPEAKER_01: Give me anything, anything.
12:54
SPEAKER_01: I'll never not watch.
12:56
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
12:56
SPEAKER_01: You know, Lila, our uh friend of the pod, her dad calls it, uh, thinks it's called, and so it goes.
13:03
SPEAKER_01: Maybe it should be called It Is What It Is.
13:06
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
13:08
SPEAKER_02: But it really is Zoo.
13:09
SPEAKER_02: I can't wait anymore.
13:10
SPEAKER_02: It is what it is.
13:11
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
13:11
SPEAKER_02: Oh, speaking of Lila, Lila, uh, welcome to the Patreon.
13:14
SPEAKER_02: Um we uh we just recorded- How is it in there?
13:18
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, tell us.
13:20
SPEAKER_02: Down below, what's going on in there?
13:21
SPEAKER_02: Uh, but we did just record um a Patreon episode.
13:24
SPEAKER_02: Speaking of Drag Race, we we we did a uh director's commentary on your drag race edition tape for season 18.
13:30
SPEAKER_01: I was like, I didn't know my tape was uh for public information on that note.
13:34
SPEAKER_01: On that note, why don't we take a little break and we'll bring out our fabulous about that?
13:39
SPEAKER_01: BRB.
13:46
SPEAKER_01: But I'm the one who upped my go-why not?
13:49
SPEAKER_02: Are you an SSRIs?
13:50
SPEAKER_02: Well, wait.
13:51
SPEAKER_02: Please welcome to the couch, the one and only Eric Williams, host of That's a Gay Ass Podcast and Confession Hole.
13:57
SPEAKER_00: Thank you, you fucking tons.
14:01
SPEAKER_01: For saying that.
14:02
SPEAKER_01: I just got off the plane with a tuba chopstick in a dream.
14:06
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, I'm um I think the sweat has dried.
14:10
SPEAKER_03: It certainly has.
14:10
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
14:11
SPEAKER_03: But you both we're pro sweat here, as you can tell.
14:14
SPEAKER_03: We are.
14:15
SPEAKER_01: You guys look dry.
14:16
SPEAKER_02: We do.
14:17
SPEAKER_02: We do not.
14:18
SPEAKER_03: I look rough.
14:19
SPEAKER_03: You don't, though.
14:20
SPEAKER_03: You haven't hose down.
14:22
SPEAKER_03: It's very rare I get to sit across from such a regal, gorgeous creature like you.
14:27
SPEAKER_03: And I just love to take it all in.
14:28
SPEAKER_03: So, whatever sweat you feel, that's on the inside, and he should not sweat it on the outside.
14:34
SPEAKER_01: Wow, thank you so much.
14:36
SPEAKER_01: Glowing.
14:37
SPEAKER_01: And that was today's episode.
14:38
SPEAKER_01: Thank you for coming.
14:40
SPEAKER_02: But thank you so much for um hanging out with us in the honor.
14:44
SPEAKER_03: Like meeting us for the first time.
14:46
SPEAKER_03: We saw you at your show.
14:47
SPEAKER_03: Well, by the way, thank you for coming to that goddamn solo show because I feel like a one-man show, when you first hear those phrases, tough.
14:55
SPEAKER_03: Tough when they're bad.
14:56
SPEAKER_03: Well, you killed.
14:58
SPEAKER_03: You killed.
14:58
SPEAKER_03: And thank you so much.
14:59
SPEAKER_03: So that that it's truly, truly grateful you guys came, but also like relieved that I'm now like excited to do the show again and not like embarrassed.
15:09
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
15:09
SPEAKER_01: Because how many times have you done that?
15:10
SPEAKER_03: That was the first time in New York, which was made me a little nervy, but uh I did it in LA thrice.
15:16
SPEAKER_03: The show called uh Why All the Drama.
15:18
SPEAKER_03: Why all the drama?
15:19
SPEAKER_01: It was so, so good.
15:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
15:20
SPEAKER_01: It's been a second since we've been out.
15:22
SPEAKER_01: Like we used to go to a lot of shows and stuff.
15:23
SPEAKER_01: So very, very true.
15:24
SPEAKER_01: One, thank you for forcing us to like do one damn thing.
15:27
SPEAKER_01: And two, like, you really, really killed.
15:28
SPEAKER_01: Not only was it like so fucking funny, it was also really like touching.
15:32
SPEAKER_03: You know, that is the nicest compliment because I wanted it to be like, sure, funny first, and then second, like therapy/slash horny check emotion.
15:44
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
15:44
SPEAKER_03: So, because I feel like that's like how I function.
15:47
SPEAKER_03: I love therapy.
15:48
SPEAKER_02: I was gonna say it's your whole brand.
15:49
SPEAKER_03: I love SSRIs.
15:51
SPEAKER_02: I know.
15:52
SPEAKER_02: I love where you're on, by the way.
15:53
SPEAKER_03: I love men, I love body hair, I love talking about our shit.
15:59
SPEAKER_03: So to be on a big country couch and to do all those things.
16:03
SPEAKER_03: How lucky am I?
16:04
SPEAKER_01: Thanks.
16:05
SPEAKER_01: You are.
16:07
SPEAKER_03: I agree.
16:08
SPEAKER_03: Um, so you come, you go to the We're lucky, we're lucky.
16:10
SPEAKER_03: You go to a one-man show.
16:12
SPEAKER_03: Can you tell me from the audience perspective, what were the gays giving?
16:16
SPEAKER_03: What was the vibe of gay in the audience?
16:18
SPEAKER_01: Well, we were in the last row.
16:19
SPEAKER_02: We were, yeah.
16:20
SPEAKER_02: Oh.
16:21
SPEAKER_02: Um, so we could see the at the back of every gay guy's head.
16:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
16:25
SPEAKER_01: Midtown gays, a lot of hell Hell's Kitchen, yeah.
16:28
SPEAKER_01: Kiddos.
16:28
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
16:29
SPEAKER_01: We're like used to the crunchy Brooklyn faggots.
16:32
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
16:32
SPEAKER_03: Uh but I think I'm like doing the LA version of that where I moved, I moved to the east side, like, and I go to West Hollywood now like once a year for pride.
16:41
SPEAKER_03: Wow.
16:42
SPEAKER_03: Uh, but it's just like I think, yeah, there's something about I think I myself don't identify with the Hell's Kitchen.
16:48
SPEAKER_03: No, you're more Brooklyn.
16:49
SPEAKER_03: You're giving it Yeah.
16:50
SPEAKER_03: Even I was just I'm embarrassed to say that Fire Island is not a part of my herstery.
16:54
SPEAKER_03: I've been once, but haven't done like the adult, like actually go and enjoy it.
16:58
SPEAKER_03: And I just heard Fire the Pines is Hell's Kitchen and Cherry Grove is Hey, nothing against Hell's Kitchen gays, though.
17:05
SPEAKER_01: I think I like them too.
17:07
SPEAKER_03: Oh, I love I love a Hell's Kitchen Gay.
17:09
SPEAKER_03: It's just I I think it like is a a group a people, a personhood that I enjoy being around, but also can feel that I am not gonna play a mirror game with them.
17:20
SPEAKER_03: Like I think that I just don't it might be my own insecurities talking about.
17:24
SPEAKER_02: That's kind of how I felt a little bit at Falcone, where I was like, I don't this is not my my culture.
17:30
SPEAKER_02: These are not my people.
17:31
SPEAKER_02: Everyone was a little too hot, a little too muscled, a little too um beautiful and gorgeous.
17:37
SPEAKER_01: And I mean Sounds like my uh crew.
17:40
SPEAKER_02: But I was gonna say, you so this is sort of like an away game for you.
17:42
SPEAKER_02: So it's more like, what did you feel like being there?
17:45
SPEAKER_02: Not I mean you you I'm sure you had friends in the crowd, hopped off a plane at LAX, hopped off the plane at EWR and did your show.
17:53
SPEAKER_03: I fucking flew into Newark like a dumbass.
17:56
SPEAKER_02: Hey, it's what can you do?
17:57
SPEAKER_03: What can you do?
17:58
SPEAKER_03: But I um truly landed in Ooh, Newark.
18:02
SPEAKER_03: Newark.
18:03
SPEAKER_02: That's the delay.
18:03
SPEAKER_02: Well, is didn't Newark like explode?
18:05
SPEAKER_02: Like, didn't didn't they like have to shut it down because it no one could fly the planes or something?
18:09
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, like a month and a half ago, it was like we're parting from Newark and everyone's dying.
18:14
SPEAKER_03: So I so but I was like, I already bought the ticket, perfect.
18:17
SPEAKER_03: But um I truly landed and got off the plane, and I do this almost everywhere I land, but it does hit different in New York.
18:23
SPEAKER_03: Immediately felt the hotness of New York men.
18:26
SPEAKER_03: There's something so delicious about a New York man.
18:29
SPEAKER_01: It's a hot no one is like it's the most beautiful people live in New York, truly.
18:33
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
18:34
SPEAKER_03: I mean, listen, LA obviously has beauty, and I I'm very tired of the New York versus LA debate conversation.
18:40
SPEAKER_03: What I do think though is that LA obviously has like great gays, hot gays, hot guys, and the monsters, the plastic surgery girlies.
18:48
SPEAKER_03: But um, yeah, New York, it's just like effortlessly odd.
18:52
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
18:52
SPEAKER_03: Especially Brooklyn.
18:53
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
18:54
SPEAKER_03: Jesus.
18:54
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
18:55
SPEAKER_03: And the dad's here, it's my bread and butter.
18:58
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
18:58
SPEAKER_03: Um, but anywho, to answer your actual question, the um feeling of doing it here was excitement because I know a lot of Jews are here.
19:07
SPEAKER_03: And as a Jewess myself, I was hoping that it would resonate with those people.
19:11
SPEAKER_03: And by the way, like the day or two before the show, obviously I was nervous about tickets because it's hard not to be.
19:16
SPEAKER_03: Uh, and like multiple burgs and stein spot tickets, and I was like, we're good.
19:21
SPEAKER_03: Your people.
19:22
SPEAKER_02: Um but you sold out.
19:23
SPEAKER_02: I mean, it was amazing.
19:24
SPEAKER_02: It was a it was a packed house, it was perfect, great, warm crowd.
19:28
SPEAKER_03: It was, I speaking of the Judy Judaisma, I think that what I'm learning in my old age is that the anxiety versus reality is becoming more and more disjointed in a like a healthy way.
19:43
SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
19:43
SPEAKER_03: Because you know, like what like if I were to ask both of you, even just to categorize, what is your anxiety saying about you?
19:50
SPEAKER_03: What are your voices saying in a categorical sense?
19:52
SPEAKER_03: Um if you need an example, mine is you're bad.
19:57
SPEAKER_03: You're bad.
19:59
SPEAKER_03: You're bad.
20:00
SPEAKER_03: What would you say is your category, category of anxiety?
20:05
SPEAKER_01: Maybe you're dumb.
20:07
SPEAKER_01: Which I am.
20:07
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I didn't know that.
20:09
SPEAKER_03: What do you mean?
20:09
SPEAKER_01: Because I'm always making fun of you.
20:10
SPEAKER_01: But I am.
20:11
SPEAKER_01: I'm a creative genius.
20:12
SPEAKER_01: Like, I'll honestly.
20:13
SPEAKER_01: She is, she is, she is.
20:14
SPEAKER_03: But I'm dumb in many ways too, so like that's okay.
20:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
20:17
SPEAKER_03: Because like obviously you are not dumb.
20:21
SPEAKER_03: But there are no because like even watching even your chat on the entree was so witty and smart and funny.
20:29
SPEAKER_03: So like you're not dumb.
20:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
20:31
SPEAKER_03: But I understand that, like, like I'm dumb with uh directions and some common sense things.
20:36
SPEAKER_03: Like, I just like I like truly will.
20:40
SPEAKER_03: I first moved to LA, had drinks with a friend.
20:42
SPEAKER_03: I was like sort of trying to impress, realized he lived close by.
20:45
SPEAKER_03: I was like, oh my god, I can just like drop you off.
20:47
SPEAKER_03: Because like he had taken it Uber.
20:48
SPEAKER_03: And he was like really I was like, Yeah, I'll drop, I'll drop you off.
20:50
SPEAKER_03: And then we walk out of the bar, couldn't find the car.
20:53
SPEAKER_03: Could not find the car.
20:54
SPEAKER_03: I love that.
20:54
SPEAKER_03: To the point where I was like, I think there's an app that maybe I like literally couldn't find the car.
20:58
SPEAKER_03: Find my car.
20:58
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
20:59
SPEAKER_01: So you invented an app.
21:01
SPEAKER_01: And that's why we had to that's why your anxiety was not.
21:05
SPEAKER_02: Led you to be an entrepreneur.
21:06
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
21:07
SPEAKER_02: I think my anxiety is like you're worthless.
21:09
SPEAKER_02: I think that's uh worthless.
21:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
21:12
SPEAKER_01: I knew that.
21:14
SPEAKER_01: You're like, I didn't know you thought you were dumb, but I knew you think you're worthless.
21:19
SPEAKER_01: But you're not.
21:20
SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
21:21
SPEAKER_03: But to get PhD about it, then can I ask, like, um worth what then do you hear what do you think is of worth in reality?
21:30
SPEAKER_03: And what are your is your fe like?
21:32
SPEAKER_03: Do you know what I'm trying to say?
21:32
SPEAKER_03: Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
21:33
SPEAKER_03: What's a value and like what do you think is a value, but it actually isn't?
21:36
SPEAKER_03: That's such a great question.
21:38
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
21:38
SPEAKER_02: And like intelligence and beauty?
21:40
SPEAKER_01: Sure, sure, sure.
21:41
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I feel like you kind of like think you are like an ugly monster.
21:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
21:45
SPEAKER_01: You know, sometimes.
21:46
SPEAKER_01: Like that's your inner voice with something.
21:49
SPEAKER_03: Right.
21:50
SPEAKER_02: It is crazy.
21:51
SPEAKER_01: You guys.
21:51
SPEAKER_03: I think I flirted with you before.
21:53
SPEAKER_03: Like on like in a DM or something.
21:55
SPEAKER_02: I was saying, like, I'm trying to say that you're hot.
21:56
SPEAKER_02: Thank you, thank you.
21:57
SPEAKER_02: So, like, and and also with you, um, with your space.
22:01
SPEAKER_03: Um uh no, yeah, it's it's funny how insane we can be.
22:04
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I know.
22:05
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
22:05
SPEAKER_01: I'm also very vain because I and I've realized in my adulthood, like as a kid, I was made fun of, obviously for being effeminate and gay and all this crap.
22:15
SPEAKER_01: But like the one thing that worked for me was like I was a pretty boy or like whatever.
22:18
SPEAKER_01: So like I put stock in that at a young age.
22:21
SPEAKER_01: So I kind of like have put grown to put too much stock into like you equate it.
22:26
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, exactly.
22:27
SPEAKER_01: Well, not to blow the only thing that like worked for me, yeah.
22:29
SPEAKER_01: Like everything, my voice I was made fun of, my height, blah blah blah.
22:32
SPEAKER_02: Well, I guess that can tie into appearance, but yeah, but not to pull up your spot, like we were talking about this recently because you pulled up an like an old, old selfie where you were like smising like literally the house down boots, and it was like, why when you were straight, you were like posing like I was so robotic and weird.
22:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we're crazy.
22:49
SPEAKER_02: So every time you would take a photo, or like even like when I visit your fan your family's home and like your high school photos on the wall was like, Jesus, ganch, like what's going on?
22:57
SPEAKER_03: So it's all every birthday party is like three, two, one.
23:01
SPEAKER_01: Jeez.
23:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, truly, truly.
23:04
SPEAKER_01: One time my like four-year-old nephew was like, Why do you do this in photos?
23:08
SPEAKER_01: Wait, how old was your nephew?
23:10
SPEAKER_01: Four.
23:10
SPEAKER_01: Four.
23:11
SPEAKER_01: It was amazing.
23:12
SPEAKER_01: And that I was like that.
23:16
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
23:16
SPEAKER_01: Sure, sure, sure.
23:17
SPEAKER_01: With the bottle in, right?
23:18
SPEAKER_01: That kind of pull your own.
23:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
23:21
SPEAKER_01: But he gave like a weird bulgy, like And you said, drag me.
23:25
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, actually, like that's a great fucking question.
23:28
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
23:28
SPEAKER_01: So I adjusted.
23:30
SPEAKER_02: No, you have you have chilled.
23:31
SPEAKER_01: No, I'm like, I'm like arguably straight now, now that I'm gay now, you know.
23:35
SPEAKER_03: I mean, and you said note taken.
23:37
SPEAKER_03: Um I think that ending any sort of story or joke with he's four, or he's saying what the age is, it's always funny.
23:46
SPEAKER_03: I don't care what's before it.
23:47
SPEAKER_03: And I feel like when I say it, I feel like I'm trying to channel Kristen Johnston.
23:50
SPEAKER_03: He's four.
23:52
SPEAKER_01: I love Kristen Johnston.
23:54
SPEAKER_03: I think I I think I bring her up any chance that I can.
23:57
SPEAKER_03: Um she should be on just like that.
24:00
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
24:00
SPEAKER_01: Like everyone says to just bring her back.
24:02
SPEAKER_01: First of all, it should be called then just like Splat.
24:05
SPEAKER_01: You know?
24:06
SPEAKER_01: And it should be her Mormon twin sister, right?
24:09
SPEAKER_01: We're breaking all the rules.
24:10
SPEAKER_01: Come on, bring her back.
24:10
SPEAKER_03: Well, it would be amazing.
24:11
SPEAKER_03: I think that's a brilliant idea.
24:13
SPEAKER_03: My awful pitch was that like she didn't die.
24:16
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
24:16
SPEAKER_03: Actually, that's better.
24:17
SPEAKER_03: I want the real one.
24:18
SPEAKER_03: No, no, but they went to the funeral, so it's kind of like maybe it's like they do a flashback.
24:22
SPEAKER_03: I wish.
24:23
SPEAKER_02: Well, they like they like decided that COVID never happened in the world.
24:26
SPEAKER_02: No, they did, they did, they did.
24:27
SPEAKER_02: Or it was like over by the time the show started.
24:29
SPEAKER_02: So they actually respect.
24:30
SPEAKER_02: They can do whatever they want.
24:32
SPEAKER_02: She didn't die.
24:33
SPEAKER_03: Well, yeah, we know the show's not in reality.
24:35
SPEAKER_03: I think that's I and I don't I I want to just be clear here that I have not been watching every single episode of this new season because uh I love them so much.
24:45
SPEAKER_03: Do you know what I mean?
24:45
SPEAKER_03: I understand that.
24:46
SPEAKER_03: Yeah it's been it's been hard.
24:47
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
24:50
SPEAKER_03: You're making the right decision.
24:51
SPEAKER_03: I gave him a chance at the beginning of the this season.
24:53
SPEAKER_03: I think I watched one to two, and I said, you know what?
24:56
SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna not watch someone suffer.
25:00
SPEAKER_02: It that is so honest and respectful, you know, because they are, you know, they they deserve our respect.
25:06
SPEAKER_03: And I do, and I do.
25:07
SPEAKER_03: Like I I still feel that there's a world that will get them back.
25:12
SPEAKER_03: Like, I don't know if that's Samantha coming back.
25:15
SPEAKER_03: I don't know if it's just like again, I don't want to tarnish my memories of them.
25:19
SPEAKER_03: I know.
25:19
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I have like my two sex in the city, like core power, core memory feelings.
25:26
SPEAKER_03: Numero Uno on the bed with my mom.
25:28
SPEAKER_03: I'm 14.
25:31
SPEAKER_03: And I'm like riveted, and also like riveted.
25:35
SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm just like I can't, I'm watching this sort of bondy with my mother, with whom I have zero boundaries.
25:40
SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
25:41
SPEAKER_03: And also, I was obviously in love with it because I'm a fucking gay guy.
25:44
SPEAKER_03: Living in St.
25:45
SPEAKER_03: Louis, Missouri, being like, that is a land that I would love to see.
25:49
SPEAKER_03: That could be me.
25:49
SPEAKER_00: That could be me, Land Dick.
25:51
SPEAKER_03: And then get this.
25:53
SPEAKER_03: One day I ended up moving to New York City, and then my survival job years and years later, I was a tour guide.
25:59
SPEAKER_03: And I would give a tour of the Highline, and I would taught tell a story that was on the tour of Samantha Jones's apartment when she moved to the meat packing district.
26:08
SPEAKER_03: She yelled at the like trans women at the street level.
26:11
SPEAKER_03: And I just like that show has she raised me.
26:15
SPEAKER_02: Truly.
26:16
SPEAKER_02: She did.
26:17
SPEAKER_02: I first came to it because I would I um we didn't have cable until my grandma moved in with us in uh middle of high school.
26:25
SPEAKER_02: But I finally was able to also get a TV in my room after both my siblings went to college.
26:29
SPEAKER_03: And they Well, you can't just say that so quickly.
26:32
SPEAKER_03: You didn't have cable until high school.
26:33
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
26:34
SPEAKER_03: And were you in a tiny Thai village?
26:38
SPEAKER_02: No, my parents were just they were real.
26:41
SPEAKER_02: They were just, I guess, I don't know, like weird.
26:42
SPEAKER_02: They were like, Well, we didn't have soda either.
26:44
SPEAKER_02: It was like a weird thing.
26:45
SPEAKER_02: It was like fake healthy, fake.
26:47
SPEAKER_02: Now that's poor.
26:47
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
26:49
SPEAKER_03: Is it giving poor or is it giving religion?
26:51
SPEAKER_02: I think it no, definitely not religion.
26:52
SPEAKER_02: But I think at times maybe it was poor, but I think it was more like uh they don't need that stuff.
26:58
SPEAKER_02: Is that like crunchy hippie?
27:00
SPEAKER_02: A little like alt?
27:02
SPEAKER_02: A little alt.
27:03
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
27:03
SPEAKER_01: They give you like a stick and a bowl of yarn.
27:05
SPEAKER_02: But then my grand my grandpa, yeah, yeah, little a lot of um hoop and stick vibes.
27:09
SPEAKER_02: Um, no, and then my grandpa died, and my grandma moved in with us, and she was like, I need cable 24-7, so we had to get it in the house.
27:15
SPEAKER_02: Well, you pick up a Dr.
27:16
SPEAKER_01: Leper.
27:17
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's what I heard.
27:18
SPEAKER_01: I was like, Don't breeze over grandmother's writer, like demanding cable.
27:22
SPEAKER_01: She brought her own cable.
27:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and everyone was actually, yeah, we were a lot happier for it.
27:25
SPEAKER_02: But I this is so so unrelated because I still couldn't even get cable in my room, but I was allowed to finally have a TV in my room, and I would watch the WB11 censored versions of Sex in the City that would come on at like after the news at like 12 p.m.
27:38
SPEAKER_02: or something.
27:38
SPEAKER_02: So I'm getting like this weird watered down version of it, but loving every second of it.
27:41
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, what did they do for the sex scenes for that?
27:43
SPEAKER_03: I think they would like just cut past it.
27:46
SPEAKER_02: They would cut past it or blur.
27:47
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
27:48
SPEAKER_02: And then it would be like, Carrie, I screwed.
27:50
SPEAKER_02: Instead of like Carrie, I fucked or whatever.
27:52
SPEAKER_02: It's like, Carrie, you need to screw someone.
27:54
SPEAKER_03: Like dumb.
27:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
27:57
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
27:58
SPEAKER_03: Uh I don't mean to uh backseat drive, but I want to ask one more question.
28:02
SPEAKER_02: Please take complete control over the podcast and just have it from now on.
28:05
SPEAKER_02: That's you're a better hands.
28:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
28:07
SPEAKER_02: Literally.
28:07
SPEAKER_03: No, I'm just a Virgo and high.
28:09
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, Virgo!
28:11
SPEAKER_03: I'm a Virgo.
28:12
SPEAKER_03: September 21, I'm the last day.
28:14
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you're Cusby.
28:15
SPEAKER_03: I'm Cusby.
28:16
SPEAKER_03: The Libra?
28:16
SPEAKER_03: The Libra.
28:17
SPEAKER_02: The Libra energy I'm getting.
28:18
SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
28:19
SPEAKER_02: September 21 is the last day?
28:20
SPEAKER_02: I thought I thought the 22nd was the last day.
28:22
SPEAKER_03: If I've been saying this wrong for years, God.
28:24
SPEAKER_02: No, I think people treat the cusp.
28:27
SPEAKER_02: Because I'm I'm July 22nd.
28:28
SPEAKER_02: I'm I'm the last day of cancer, but some people say that's fully Leo.
28:31
SPEAKER_02: So I think it depends on like where you got your horoscopes from.
28:34
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, truly like what ww.astrology.com site I went to.
28:41
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I'm pretty, I'm pretty like and like, yeah, I'm just like not well.
28:47
SPEAKER_01: Do you like other Virgos?
28:48
SPEAKER_01: Not really.
28:49
SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's a good question.
28:50
SPEAKER_02: That's why there's so much tension between you.
28:52
SPEAKER_03: No, I think I do actually.
28:53
SPEAKER_03: I think I I there's no ver honestly, there are other signs that I have more tension with than Virgo for sure.
29:00
SPEAKER_03: Virgo, I actually think we're I think we we see each other.
29:03
SPEAKER_03: Game recognizes game.
29:04
SPEAKER_03: Um yeah.
29:05
SPEAKER_03: What was my question?
29:06
SPEAKER_03: You were saying, yeah.
29:07
SPEAKER_03: Sex in the city, if you think about if you can just be like, okay, I have to decide one of the highlighted sex scenes from all the original seasons.
29:14
SPEAKER_03: What's one that stands out either for being super hot or just like a really quintessential like sex scene from Sex in the City?
29:21
SPEAKER_02: I think the first thing that came to mind was um Samantha telling the guy his dick wasn't big enough.
29:27
SPEAKER_02: That was that stands out.
29:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
29:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
29:30
SPEAKER_01: I'll piggyback on that and say when the dick was too big, right?
29:34
SPEAKER_01: Wasn't it one that was too big?
29:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
29:36
SPEAKER_03: Check everything.
29:36
SPEAKER_03: Mine is um Samantha and I think it's Smith, where they're fucking in so many positions.
29:42
SPEAKER_03: At one point they do like a montage, and she's like on a chair on the bed doing it.
29:47
SPEAKER_03: I actually love Remember as a teenager being like, How do you do that?
29:51
SPEAKER_03: Where's the penetration at?
29:52
SPEAKER_03: Like, I feel like I was very confused.
29:53
SPEAKER_01: For a second, I thought, like when you said Smith, I pictured Richard.
29:58
SPEAKER_03: By the way, on my gay ass podcast, I asked, whose fault is it that you're gay?
30:04
SPEAKER_03: And I'm going to say that obviously the list is so long.
30:07
SPEAKER_03: Tell me it's Richard.
30:08
SPEAKER_03: And Richard is Richard's dick on the rooftop uh when they jump into that pool.
30:13
SPEAKER_03: It's the first time I'd seen probably like a dick with Bush on television.
30:18
SPEAKER_01: Oh, right, because they show it.
30:19
SPEAKER_01: That's right.
30:20
SPEAKER_03: He pulls his either his robe open, I think.
30:22
SPEAKER_03: And you see like a heavy, girthy dick with some pubes.
30:25
SPEAKER_03: And if we dive into the pubes for a second, please part of my like obsession with body hair is that I I had this memory recently that was like, oh god, you really have been dealing with this for a while.
30:36
SPEAKER_03: I used to, if I was at a urinal in a public place and I would see a pube on the toy on the on the uh would as a kid see it on a urinal, I'd be like, thank god it's not only me.
30:45
SPEAKER_03: Like I felt like it was like I I thought like I had been specially chosen to have the most disgusting body hair, pubes and all.
30:53
SPEAKER_03: And so whenever I saw them in the wild, I was like, there are people out there like, yeah.
30:57
SPEAKER_03: You're feeling seen.
30:58
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I just like that's beautiful.
31:00
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I felt so embarrassed and then like relieved.
31:03
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
31:04
SPEAKER_02: That's so funny because we talked about this in the podcast.
31:06
SPEAKER_02: I I we both were sort of late bloomers, maybe you a little later than than me.
31:10
SPEAKER_02: Uh blooming.
31:11
SPEAKER_02: But I every time a classmate would raise their hand, like 12 years old and on, I would like look and see.
31:17
SPEAKER_02: I'm like, do they have armpit hair?
31:19
SPEAKER_02: Do they have armpit hair?
31:19
SPEAKER_02: Do they have armpit hair?
31:20
SPEAKER_02: Because I was slow growing over here.
31:22
SPEAKER_02: And you really wanted it.
31:23
SPEAKER_02: And I wanted it, and I wanted to see if anyone else had it too.
31:26
SPEAKER_01: And it's like those early bloomers have like the like blast of the phone.
31:29
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
31:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you have great pits for you.
31:32
SPEAKER_02: When did uh when did you get yours?
31:33
SPEAKER_02: Do you trim those?
31:34
SPEAKER_02: No.
31:35
SPEAKER_02: Really?
31:35
SPEAKER_02: I don't have great pits to begin with.
31:38
SPEAKER_02: So they really I mean they're not like incredibly full.
31:40
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
31:41
SPEAKER_03: I think I take for granted having pit hair, I guess.
31:43
SPEAKER_01: No, your body hair is correct.
31:44
SPEAKER_01: It's really good.
31:45
SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
31:46
SPEAKER_01: I like don't have any hair really.
31:48
SPEAKER_01: I'm not very hairy at all, but I have a hairy bush.
31:51
SPEAKER_01: Well, thank god.
31:52
SPEAKER_01: Thank God.
31:53
SPEAKER_02: We were talking about our pubes in the last episode that we put out, and it like for us did really well on social media.
31:59
SPEAKER_02: So embarrassing.
32:00
SPEAKER_02: Like so that's what they want.
32:01
SPEAKER_02: They just want the pubes, they want the pube talk.
32:03
SPEAKER_01: And our second viral thing is um us doing a tutorial about a big fluffy tool boa, following legs, big fluffy things.
32:10
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
32:10
SPEAKER_03: So I'll lean in the um Here's my five favorite things about my bush.
32:15
SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
32:16
SPEAKER_03: Furry crack, assuming.
32:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
32:18
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you reached to just check.
32:19
SPEAKER_03: You're like, uh, yeah, still.
32:21
unknown: Yeah.
32:22
SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, no, definitely.
32:23
SPEAKER_03: But it's funny is that I uh when I first started to be allowed to send photos of racy nature, because I've been with my husband for a very long time.
32:33
SPEAKER_03: We were monogamous for a very long time.
32:34
SPEAKER_03: Monogamous plus like didn't know, just didn't know to just like didn't send flirty besides like a little bit of flirty, like fine flirting, we didn't really do like photo video shit.
32:45
SPEAKER_03: And I feel like we were late to that game.
32:47
SPEAKER_03: Like I wasn't on grinder or scruff really ever, but especially until like the past couple years.
32:53
SPEAKER_03: All this to say, I had a guy be like, You got a really hairy ass, and I had to be like, I had to look in the mirror to be like, Do I?
33:00
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I don't.
33:02
SPEAKER_01: I I had a feeling because like you know, the thing is that you have a lot of body hair, but when I asked that question, you sort of was like, Yeah, of course.
33:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, like yeah, my ass is not like I don't have like I know some guys are like It's not a taco.
33:13
SPEAKER_03: It's not a taco, it's not a hair taco.
33:15
SPEAKER_02: But I guess it's like just a regular taco.
33:17
SPEAKER_02: It's not a taco.
33:18
SPEAKER_02: I can say confidently it's not.
33:19
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I I feel like like I'm not super super hairy, but I I have like a full beard and I have like a little bit of chest hair.
33:26
SPEAKER_02: Do this.
33:28
SPEAKER_02: Oh wow, you're right.
33:30
SPEAKER_02: But it's not it's not like I would I it could be better.
33:32
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I honestly you know from my own perspective, but I feel like comparatively my pubes and crack are like hairier than like the rest of my upper legs and torso.
33:43
SPEAKER_02: So hairier than they should be.
33:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
33:46
SPEAKER_02: That's what I'm saying.
33:46
SPEAKER_01: I'm thinking Gina might have the hairiest crack in out of the therapist.
33:50
SPEAKER_02: And show it.
33:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
33:53
SPEAKER_02: Um, well, that all being said, we uh have neglected to ask our you, our guest, uh, who are you wearing and what is your problem?
33:59
SPEAKER_02: Our patented uh phrase.
34:01
SPEAKER_03: So I'm wearing my husband's champion tank top because I wanted to like dress slutty.
34:07
SPEAKER_03: I also also because only not only is it hot, but I feel like when you when I go on a cunty couch, my version of cunty is like a fucking slut.
34:15
SPEAKER_02: You I saw you as you came in.
34:17
SPEAKER_02: I was like, you are literally dressed for the occasion because it's yeah, slutty, cunty in a million degrees in here.
34:23
SPEAKER_02: And then look at this.
34:25
SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, first jock on the couch.
34:27
SPEAKER_01: I'm kind of curious based on that color story, like what's the pouch?
34:29
SPEAKER_01: Is it white?
34:30
SPEAKER_01: We can blur it.
34:31
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
34:33
SPEAKER_03: So um actually it's great.
34:35
SPEAKER_03: It's that it's olive.
34:37
SPEAKER_03: I never would have green.
34:39
SPEAKER_03: And then there's a butt because I don't want to like I like it like oh my god, this is going viral.
34:44
SPEAKER_03: Honey.
34:44
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
34:45
SPEAKER_03: I would have never guessed.
34:46
SPEAKER_03: I don't think I revealed too much.
34:48
SPEAKER_01: I think um it's still uh we can monetize it.
34:51
SPEAKER_01: So yeah, as if we can make a single banana anything.
34:54
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but I would have never guessed olive.
34:56
SPEAKER_01: That's what a surprise.
34:57
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's uh and that was I think a gift from my husband Matt.
35:02
SPEAKER_03: So shout out.
35:03
SPEAKER_03: I love that.
35:03
SPEAKER_03: Um, yeah, I don't have any style, and um I so well I thank you for saying that.
35:07
SPEAKER_03: I but I do take all of my clothes from my husband.
35:09
SPEAKER_03: Like the anything cute I I I take from him because he he's like style, got style, he makes our apartment look great.
35:16
SPEAKER_03: Um, and then my problem is um my mom has COVID.
35:22
SPEAKER_03: There's more.
35:22
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
35:23
SPEAKER_03: Not only does my mom have COVID, but I'm a hypochondriac.
35:26
SPEAKER_03: And even though she is thousands of miles away, it's her telling me that she had it, you might have it, gave it to me.
35:34
SPEAKER_03: And so I spent this is yesterday, by the way.
35:36
SPEAKER_03: I don't have COVID.
35:37
SPEAKER_03: I feel completely fine.
35:39
SPEAKER_03: However, my insanity made me start to like Google COVID surge.
35:44
SPEAKER_03: It's surging, by the way.
35:45
SPEAKER_01: It's surging.
35:46
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
35:47
SPEAKER_01: Like it said retro.
35:48
SPEAKER_01: It's fucking retro.
35:49
SPEAKER_01: It's a throwback.
35:49
SPEAKER_03: It's like we're in a surgery.
35:50
SPEAKER_03: When you said that you had it somewhat recently, I was like, well, there's been a surgery.
35:54
SPEAKER_03: So like it's like I'm my problem is that I, no matter how much therapy I do or drugs I take, I feel insane.
36:03
SPEAKER_03: I'm like, I my intellectually, I'm like, I'm good.
36:06
SPEAKER_03: The fucking title of my show, Why All the Drama, is what this my therapist said to me when I spiraled.
36:12
SPEAKER_03: And I told my very dear friend yesterday about the COVID story, and he went, Why all the drama?
36:17
SPEAKER_03: And I was like, Okay.
36:18
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god, like I guess I deserve that.
36:21
SPEAKER_01: Wait, I need I'm dying to know what SSRIs are we talking about.
36:24
SPEAKER_03: So I actually started on Zoloft, got all the way up to either 20 or like 25, and it was very much like, is there it's not working.
36:31
SPEAKER_03: So then um I and by it not working, I like just like did not feel a single difference.
36:37
SPEAKER_03: And so, and they were like, Well, we're pumping a lot into you.
36:39
SPEAKER_03: So then I got on LexaPro.
36:41
SPEAKER_01: I heard that's like fun and happy.
36:43
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, like, I've definitely the biggest thing for me is that it like it lets me go to sleep.
36:48
SPEAKER_03: Oh my anxiety is so my thoughts are so fast and present that as long as like at nighttime I can be like okay, I'm gonna go to bed, versus like I'm gonna try to go to bed and I'm gonna spend a lot of time like fighting the thoughts.
37:02
SPEAKER_03: So LexPro lets me do that problem.
37:05
SPEAKER_03: 20 milligrams was really good, but I couldn't use my dick.
37:09
SPEAKER_01: I was gonna ask, yeah.
37:10
SPEAKER_01: I heard LexPro was like slam dunk and then you're just immediately castrated.
37:14
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
37:15
SPEAKER_03: And it was to the point where I was like doing I was like um experiencing enough of a difficulty that I was like, you know what, this is not like I'd rather be a little more anxious and able to get hard.
37:25
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
37:26
SPEAKER_03: And so um I went down to 10 milligrams.
37:29
SPEAKER_03: I, you know, eased my way down, and that's what I've been holding steady at for a while now.
37:34
SPEAKER_03: And she's good and she's okay.
37:36
SPEAKER_01: Well, do you have to like add in well butrin to like help you come?
37:39
SPEAKER_01: Or does that not get that with Lexapro?
37:42
SPEAKER_01: I feel like they don't.
37:43
SPEAKER_03: One my psychiatrist told me that if I'm dealing with more anxiety than depression, well butrin can spike your anxiety.
37:51
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
37:52
SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, well, I don't need to do that.
37:54
SPEAKER_03: So I sort of like kept at the Lexapro, but like, I don't know, people are saying that like other natural supplements I could be maybe getting into.
38:02
SPEAKER_03: Have you been seeing online all these gay guys talking about how zinc is making them come more?
38:05
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I have seen that.
38:07
SPEAKER_03: You too?
38:07
unknown: Yeah, no.
38:08
SPEAKER_03: Tell me everything.
38:09
SPEAKER_03: It works.
38:10
SPEAKER_01: Does it make your load huge or what?
38:12
SPEAKER_01: Um, I don't necessarily notice like a huge increase in my load.
38:17
SPEAKER_01: Um I have big balls, so I feel like I'm kind of a big biter shooter to begin with.
38:23
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, sorry.
38:24
SPEAKER_01: Sorry, I'm getting my fan.
38:25
SPEAKER_01: That one died.
38:27
SPEAKER_01: Um so I didn't notice, but I take it for um, because I'm also a hypochondriac, I feel like I was taking it before the gays were.
38:33
SPEAKER_01: Wait, I love that you're you're still on mic.
38:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
38:35
SPEAKER_02: It's like we've got we've got the length for him.
38:37
SPEAKER_01: So yeah.
38:38
SPEAKER_01: We're tethered.
38:40
SPEAKER_01: Um I take it for like so I don't get sick.
38:43
SPEAKER_01: I've heard maca is good for your load too.
38:48
SPEAKER_02: Um, this is a crazy one.
38:51
SPEAKER_02: I have a friend who's who was taking a bunch of those.
38:53
SPEAKER_02: I shouldn't ask him what what he was on.
38:55
SPEAKER_03: Um I want to I don't really worry too much about my load.
38:58
SPEAKER_03: Not that I'm like, it's it's just not I understand that if you're performing on camera, yeah, you want it to look a certain way.
39:04
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
39:05
SPEAKER_03: Uh actually on Confession Hole, the whole someone was asking me like what it actually is, and I realized I could be a little clearer.
39:12
SPEAKER_03: It's basically like we shot all these long form interviews, and then they're chopped up for social media, and then the actual full-length things are on my substack, and Kyle Krieger, OnlyFans Hottie, told me something very interesting during that interview, which is that sometimes in when they're filming sex and the cum shot isn't big enough, they will off-camera spray a bottle with the yeah.
39:42
SPEAKER_03: They put helmets in a straw.
39:43
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
39:44
SPEAKER_03: They go shoot it.
39:44
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
39:45
SPEAKER_03: Um and or sometimes we'll put it inside of the bottom to then see it, see it come out.
39:53
SPEAKER_02: I've also I've also heard, I don't know how if they they still do this, but they used to have stuntcocks too, which they'd have a guy come in and just blow the load at the very end.
40:00
SPEAKER_02: Oh and then c go off camera.
40:03
SPEAKER_02: It's amazing.
40:03
SPEAKER_03: That's like that's like the gayest version of a hand model.
40:07
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
40:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
40:09
SPEAKER_03: Can we bring in the cumer?
40:11
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
40:11
SPEAKER_02: He's got a great load.
40:12
SPEAKER_02: Uh my friend, yeah, he's got a great load.
40:13
SPEAKER_02: But yeah, we'll come in on the on the on the day.
40:15
SPEAKER_03: There is uh there are, you know, there are some guys who are known for just like rafters.
40:20
SPEAKER_01: Follow someone who shoots crazy, crazy, scary loads that don't stop.
40:25
SPEAKER_03: How does that make you feel when you see it?
40:27
SPEAKER_01: Kind of jealous.
40:29
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
40:30
SPEAKER_01: If I'm being honest, but it's actually so much come that it's would be a huge uh nuisance.
40:35
SPEAKER_01: It's like do you is it do you know if it's really well that's I was just gonna say so much so that you're gonna think it's fake and you're gonna tell me it's absolutely fake.
40:44
SPEAKER_01: Well, I know But he has millions of followers, and I I'm looking for the like water bottle like attachment.
40:49
SPEAKER_02: No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
40:50
SPEAKER_02: They're fine.
40:51
SPEAKER_02: You inject it into your into your bladder, basically, and then you squirt it out.
40:55
SPEAKER_02: It's a fetish.
40:56
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
40:59
SPEAKER_00: I gotta go.
41:00
SPEAKER_03: What do they think of next?
41:01
SPEAKER_03: I just the more I live, and I love to, you know, live with liberation and and acceptance.
41:08
SPEAKER_03: But we gays have gone too far for a long time.
41:10
SPEAKER_03: I agree.
41:11
SPEAKER_03: Well, some people by design want to go too far.
41:13
SPEAKER_03: Like that the kink is going too far.
41:15
SPEAKER_03: So it's like, I don't know.
41:17
SPEAKER_03: I'm just seeing uh well, it's actually across the board in terms of like pumping your dick, balls, bladder, shit.
41:25
SPEAKER_03: But then when you like all of a sudden go out and you see certain plastic surgeries that are like starting to like really become in that really like like the whole thing that what show is it where these women their the plastic surgeon was guessing their age?
41:40
SPEAKER_03: He was like 39 and they were like 22 years old.
41:44
SPEAKER_03: Is it the new like plastic surgery rewind show that one or is it not?
41:47
SPEAKER_03: No, but it it's there it was basically maybe it was like on TikTok, a guy that was reacting to like Love Island girls from a couple seasons ago.
41:55
SPEAKER_03: It was something like that, and it's a lot because I think like plastic surgery is uh making a lot of us look worse.
42:02
SPEAKER_01: Also, like TRT or roids, when guys are on gear, they look so old.
42:08
SPEAKER_01: I just like follow someone, I follow someone and they were like, It's my 26th birthday.
42:12
SPEAKER_01: I was like, I thought you were 47.
42:15
SPEAKER_03: 26.
42:16
SPEAKER_03: Wait, you said TRT or like gear like roids.
42:20
SPEAKER_02: Gear is like the slang term for it.
42:23
SPEAKER_02: Wow, I've never heard that gear.
42:26
SPEAKER_02: That sounds so cool.
42:27
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'm like, can I get some can I get some gear?
42:29
SPEAKER_02: Um I kind of, you know, cool.
42:32
SPEAKER_02: I love as scary as it is, I love like an old school 90s gay guy plastic surgery face, like scary, like yeah, horrible, like zombie work.
42:43
SPEAKER_02: I I kind of wish that would handsome squidward, is that?
42:46
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
42:48
SPEAKER_02: But like but with like a really frail body, like like it's like you're like in trouble, but your face is cement.
42:54
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
42:54
SPEAKER_02: I kind of love that.
42:56
SPEAKER_03: If I ever grow my dream that I'm trying to manifest is that I make enough money to hire like a really hot personal trainer or just like really good one, and then I for pay enough money to force myself to go and just get bigger tits.
43:06
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
43:07
SPEAKER_03: But knowing me, I won't want to touch my lower body.
43:10
SPEAKER_03: So thank you.
43:11
SPEAKER_03: I wasn't fishing, but I'll take it.
43:13
SPEAKER_03: Um, but I have a feeling that like I would be the type of person that would be like do does too much work in one area and neglects the rest and looks insane.
43:22
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
43:22
SPEAKER_02: Well, you need to- I'm top heavy.
43:24
SPEAKER_02: The the current I've seen like this meme kind of joke thing where it's like gays turn 30 and they either go on hormones or they like start lifting weights.
43:31
SPEAKER_02: Like that's like the um the two pads.
43:34
SPEAKER_02: Or well, ooh, yeah, or both.
43:35
SPEAKER_02: Like Gina?
43:36
SPEAKER_02: Uh just kidding.
43:36
SPEAKER_02: Um I'd go on TRT for fun.
43:41
SPEAKER_02: I like want to get my testosterone checks just for some reasons.
43:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
43:46
SPEAKER_02: My balls have gotten smaller.
43:48
SPEAKER_02: I know.
43:48
SPEAKER_02: And I want to see those.
43:49
SPEAKER_02: Uh you're soon.
43:50
SPEAKER_02: Uh but I don't think I've m monitored my size, should I be?
43:54
SPEAKER_02: Well, I I don't know.
43:56
SPEAKER_02: Only only if it kind of stood out to you like I would I haven't been monitored.
44:00
SPEAKER_02: Monitoring my the size of my balls to find out.
44:02
SPEAKER_02: I just was sort of like looking at them and feeling them, and I was like, these feel a little shrunken.
44:05
SPEAKER_02: I was like, what's going on down there?
44:07
SPEAKER_02: What I it might be the trauma.
44:08
SPEAKER_02: Um, but uh went right to your sack.
44:11
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
44:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
44:12
SPEAKER_03: Can I tell you though, I like I think we should all be checking our sacks and our balls.
44:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
44:17
SPEAKER_03: I had a fucking like crazy scare that ultimately was fine, and it's totally fine.
44:23
SPEAKER_03: But like I woke up in the middle of the night and I felt like a pain, and I was like, Okay, so I'm gonna die.
44:30
SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna die very soon.
44:31
SPEAKER_03: Yep, yep, yep.
44:31
SPEAKER_03: Uh and the long story short is that I ended up like being able to finally get like the ultrasound, and they were like, we don't know what it is, but you're probably fine.
44:39
SPEAKER_03: And then the next doctor's point was like, we don't know what it is, and you might be fine, but you should go see a cancer doctor.
44:45
SPEAKER_03: And then that appointment was like, We think you're gonna be fine, but get another ultrasound.
44:50
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
44:50
SPEAKER_03: And then a few months after that, you're yeah, you're definitely, you're definitely looking good, but get another ultrasound.
44:55
SPEAKER_03: And every step of the way, I was like, I think and it was like shrinking.
44:58
SPEAKER_03: It was a little small mass down there.
45:00
SPEAKER_03: Okay, okay.
45:00
SPEAKER_03: And um there was someone that was shrinking?
45:02
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, just with like time.
45:05
SPEAKER_03: And so like I like had this like weird, like I didn't tell my uh parents, my family about it at all, because I was like, I'm willing to bet they were also hypochondriacs.
45:13
SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah.
45:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
45:14
SPEAKER_03: I mean, when I told my mom on the phone, when she told me she had COVID, and of course, I was like, How are you feeling?
45:18
SPEAKER_03: What can anything I can do?
45:19
SPEAKER_03: Then I was like, Yeah, I'm like, it's funny, ever since you texted me, I've been sort of spiraling a bit about it.
45:24
SPEAKER_03: She's like, Well, should she get tested?
45:26
SPEAKER_03: I mean, she like immediately yes and did it.
45:27
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
45:28
SPEAKER_01: So, like, I have an Italian mom.
45:30
SPEAKER_01: I feel like Jewish moms and Italian moms are adjacent in the uh scary.
45:33
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, are Italians as hypochondriactical?
45:36
SPEAKER_01: I think so.
45:37
SPEAKER_01: I would say.
45:38
SPEAKER_01: I think it manifests slightly differently.
45:40
SPEAKER_01: It's more like the family of warriors.
45:42
SPEAKER_03: What are you saying warriors or warriors?
45:45
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, what's your wait?
45:46
SPEAKER_01: I'm from Cranston, Rhode Island, so ignore the accent.
45:49
SPEAKER_01: My ex is from Cranston.
45:50
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
45:52
SPEAKER_01: Is he a piece of trash?
45:54
SPEAKER_03: No, and I well, I don't know because he blocks me.
45:57
SPEAKER_03: Off camera, off mic, I'm gonna tell you his name.
45:59
SPEAKER_01: Um because I probably know him.
46:01
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, how many gay guys are from Cranston?
46:03
SPEAKER_03: Four.
46:03
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
46:04
SPEAKER_03: So no, hi, I feel I feel like I feel we I feel weird about I just feel like breaking up with someone and then never talking to them again is a very crazy human experience.
46:15
SPEAKER_03: Because he was my first love and we were together for I say two years.
46:19
SPEAKER_03: It was probably like a year and eight, ten months or something.
46:23
SPEAKER_03: Um, but it felt like a lifetime.
46:25
SPEAKER_03: I mean, it was like really deep love intense.
46:29
SPEAKER_03: And then we kind of were friendly for a couple years after and then stopped, and then I got blocked, and it's now been like why?
46:37
SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
46:38
SPEAKER_03: I I don't know.
46:38
SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
46:39
SPEAKER_03: And I and it's it's it's just like a cra an ex is just crazy because I don't even know where he lives, how he's doing like, and it's not something I need to know, yeah, but I can't help but wonder.
46:49
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, that's how I feel.
46:50
SPEAKER_01: My ex and I don't really talk except about like logistical things.
46:54
SPEAKER_01: We still live together, and so occasionally I'll get the like, is there a piece of mail for me?
46:58
SPEAKER_01: And that's it.
46:59
SPEAKER_01: And it's just like strange to me because I like, I mean, I usually keep in touch with all my exes.
47:03
SPEAKER_01: I pay my preschool girlfriend's rent.
47:06
SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
47:07
SPEAKER_01: Like I keep in touch with them all.
47:08
SPEAKER_01: Like I try to.
47:09
SPEAKER_01: I do think.
47:10
SPEAKER_03: Do you see how I really believe that?
47:14
SPEAKER_03: I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes.
47:16
SPEAKER_03: You make enough money.
47:18
SPEAKER_03: I do.
47:20
SPEAKER_03: I do.
47:21
SPEAKER_01: No, but I usually keep in touch.
47:23
SPEAKER_01: Uh that's great.
47:23
SPEAKER_01: So it's weird to like not.
47:25
SPEAKER_01: I wish.
47:25
SPEAKER_03: I mean I I don't know if I was saying this to you or someone else.
47:29
SPEAKER_03: I um lost my virginity to a friend in college, and then he came to my show that you were at.
47:34
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
47:35
SPEAKER_03: You said that.
47:35
SPEAKER_03: And I called him out during the show, and I haven't heard from him.
47:37
SPEAKER_03: So I'm like, I thought we were.
47:39
SPEAKER_03: Did you see him happen?
47:41
SPEAKER_02: I think he stood up when you when you said that.
47:43
SPEAKER_01: I don't think so.
47:44
SPEAKER_02: I saw someone I saw someone stand up and take a bow, but he was off to the side and kind of in shadow.
47:48
SPEAKER_02: So I you definitely didn't see him from the stage, but I can see him.
47:50
SPEAKER_02: I can see him, yeah.
47:51
SPEAKER_01: Interesting.
47:51
SPEAKER_02: So is either somebody pretending to like be the guy?
47:54
SPEAKER_03: I'm obsessed that I'm learning new information on the big cunty couch.
47:58
SPEAKER_03: It feels right.
47:59
SPEAKER_03: That's where it happens.
48:00
SPEAKER_03: Wow, he stood up.
48:01
SPEAKER_03: I can't wait to check the tape.
48:03
SPEAKER_03: You should check the confirm.
48:04
SPEAKER_03: I want to know too.
48:05
SPEAKER_01: But he would have been hallucinating.
48:07
SPEAKER_01: You were having a double margarita.
48:08
SPEAKER_01: Well, so were you?
48:09
SPEAKER_03: Well, that would be a good one.
48:10
SPEAKER_03: Thank God.
48:11
SPEAKER_03: But he that I bring him up because like he is someone that I still quasi stayed in touch with.
48:15
SPEAKER_03: He's just like such a good guy.
48:17
SPEAKER_03: Like a good one.
48:19
SPEAKER_03: But yeah, I I I don't besides him, I there are no like I haven't didn't really date anybody besides my current husband and my ex.
48:27
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
48:27
SPEAKER_02: That's sort of like my storyline too.
48:29
SPEAKER_02: But my ex hates me.
48:30
SPEAKER_02: Hates you.
48:31
SPEAKER_02: You might know well, in the LA world, maybe you've crossed paths.
48:34
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
48:34
SPEAKER_02: We'll talk about it off camera.
48:35
SPEAKER_02: But yeah, he hates me.
48:36
SPEAKER_02: But it's like this really crazy thing where you kind of have to like come to terms with the fact that like the story that they're telling themselves about you and about your relationship has nothing to do with you.
48:46
SPEAKER_02: And it does, and it while it might be like what they need and it might be true for them, you just have to let them have it.
48:54
SPEAKER_02: Well, I would say that you can take it on.
48:56
SPEAKER_01: The truth is whatever you want it to be.
48:58
SPEAKER_01: You know.
48:59
SPEAKER_01: You're in court.
49:00
SPEAKER_01: I was just thinking the same thing.
49:02
SPEAKER_01: The thing about that, I think I is a judge of the truth.
49:06
SPEAKER_01: It's whatever you want to be.
49:07
SPEAKER_01: What do you say the truth is?
49:08
SPEAKER_01: Okay, you heard it.
49:09
SPEAKER_01: And I have two gavel.
49:12
SPEAKER_03: But your wrists are super limp.
49:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
49:14
SPEAKER_03: Oh, I guess I guess that you're I agree.
49:15
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
49:16
SPEAKER_03: No, it is.
49:16
SPEAKER_03: You have to say you have to make it.
49:17
SPEAKER_01: Because I'm a stoner, I have all these like, you know, crazy things.
49:20
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, the truth is whatever you want it to be.
49:21
SPEAKER_01: It doesn't matter.
49:22
SPEAKER_01: It's all about perception.
49:23
SPEAKER_03: Well, I think the like under tone, take two, the underpinning, the like subtext, the context.
49:27
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, add a little intelligence to like what I said.
49:29
SPEAKER_01: Make that sound better.
49:30
SPEAKER_03: No, I think well, I'm gonna make it sound dumber, but trying to make it sound smarter.
49:33
SPEAKER_03: I think what it is is that we have so much information coming at us and like so many people's opinions, like on the internet, that if we believe the truth of one person's comment, then you like can choose to believe another truth or just believe whatever you choose to believe.
49:48
SPEAKER_03: Segway two, people saying mean shit on the internet is at an all-time high and it will only continue to get worse.
49:54
SPEAKER_03: And like I've uh dealt with like not a crazy amount, but like I've started to like my thin is take two, my skin has gotten a lot thicker, but like people can say whatever the fuck they want, and a lot of times it's like really rancid.
50:08
SPEAKER_03: And so it's like you have to decide like what the truth, like what the truth is.
50:11
SPEAKER_03: Like what truth are you gonna choose to believe?
50:13
SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
50:13
SPEAKER_03: That someone says you're a piece of shit, or yep.
50:16
SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
50:17
SPEAKER_03: And of course the answer is yeah, even if there's like 50 lines.
50:19
SPEAKER_01: But even apply to yourself, your own perception, you know how you if you're anxious prone, like you can spiral and like, you know, uh try to predict what people think of you and it doesn't matter because their perception is their own.
50:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
50:30
SPEAKER_01: It's pointless to worry about because you it the truth is whatever you want it to be.
50:34
SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
50:35
SPEAKER_01: I'll put that on a pillow.
50:37
SPEAKER_01: It's giving um marshals.
50:40
SPEAKER_01: Well, should we take a quick little break and then come back and play a game?
50:43
SPEAKER_01: Yes, but I have two questions.
50:44
SPEAKER_01: Please go ahead.
50:44
SPEAKER_01: Please.
50:45
SPEAKER_01: Do people ever tell you sometimes when you make a funny face for a comedy, uh, you look like David Arquette?
50:51
SPEAKER_01: A little a thimble?
50:52
SPEAKER_03: Oh, I haven't gotten uh Yeah, you started to say as if I was uh should be like really worried about who the the guy was gonna be.
50:59
SPEAKER_03: Well, it's a funny face, but I wouldn't.
51:00
SPEAKER_01: When you do a funny face, you look and I was like Oh no.
51:02
SPEAKER_01: No, but when you're like putting on like a shtick for like a silly voice or whatever, I see a little thimble of David.
51:08
SPEAKER_01: Well, no, that's great.
51:09
SPEAKER_01: Well, I don't know.
51:10
SPEAKER_01: Are you getting it?
51:11
SPEAKER_01: Are you getting one thimble?
51:12
SPEAKER_03: Well, I'm gonna um next time I make a funny face, I'm gonna freeze frame and then do a side by side and see if I I I love that.
51:19
SPEAKER_03: I the only like I I no one ever says I look like anybody.
51:22
SPEAKER_01: Um but only as Dewey.
51:26
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
51:27
SPEAKER_03: So Dewey was hot.
51:28
SPEAKER_03: Dewey's hot.
51:29
SPEAKER_03: Well, he David Arquette's always hot, and then Dewey took me to um Scary Movie, which is another movie that made me gay.
51:35
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
51:36
SPEAKER_03: Um, including Regina Hall.
51:38
SPEAKER_01: Anyways, yes, did you have another question?
51:40
SPEAKER_01: I did.
51:40
SPEAKER_01: When you first came out for your show, was the song for whatever reason I mean, the chair was so loud, and where we were sitting, I couldn't hear.
51:48
SPEAKER_01: Was it Your One in a Million by Bosun?
51:50
SPEAKER_01: Bosan?
51:50
SPEAKER_01: Bosin?
51:51
SPEAKER_01: Okay, good.
51:52
SPEAKER_01: Pew.
51:53
SPEAKER_01: Amazing choice.
51:53
SPEAKER_01: I thought so.
51:54
SPEAKER_01: But I was dying to know because I couldn't.
51:55
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god, the music wasn't fucking loud enough to be.
51:58
SPEAKER_01: No, no, no, no, it was to how excited and packed the house was, but okay, good to know.
52:03
SPEAKER_03: Well, so the the lore behind that is that um I we were like going through the tech before the show, and he was like, Okay, I said, let's run the beginning.
52:10
SPEAKER_03: He goes, Okay, and here's Eric Williams.
52:12
SPEAKER_03: And I walked out in silence, and I was like, This is insane.
52:15
SPEAKER_03: Like, I would have been crazy.
52:17
SPEAKER_03: I need something.
52:18
SPEAKER_03: And he was like, Well, what song do you want?
52:20
SPEAKER_03: And I was like, Do you have anything gay?
52:21
SPEAKER_03: I just want something gay.
52:22
SPEAKER_03: Like, I was like too tired of like he was like, I've got it.
52:26
SPEAKER_03: You let it have in.
52:27
SPEAKER_03: I was like, perfect.
52:29
SPEAKER_03: Um, so yeah, yeah, that misconducted.
52:32
SPEAKER_03: Also, that movie also made me gay.
52:35
SPEAKER_01: That's a great one.
52:36
SPEAKER_01: Sandy.
52:37
SPEAKER_01: That lavender um Hervé Legure dress, uh the makeover reveal.
52:41
SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
52:42
SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
52:42
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
52:43
SPEAKER_02: No one knew about lavender before that.
52:44
SPEAKER_02: That makeover sequence in general is cunt.
52:47
SPEAKER_02: That's like one of the like best.
52:50
SPEAKER_02: Well, I actually say like it's well beyond um Princess Diary's.
52:53
SPEAKER_02: I was like, I don't know.
52:55
SPEAKER_02: Really?
52:55
SPEAKER_02: No, I think it's I think it's more fun because it's like they're in like an aircraft hanger.
52:58
SPEAKER_01: Like it's Princess Diaries, it's just the two like eight by tens.
53:02
SPEAKER_03: That's yeah, exactly.
53:04
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
53:04
SPEAKER_01: Let's take a break.
53:05
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, let's take a quickie breaky and we'll come back and we'll do one of our classic games.
53:08
SPEAKER_03: And uh this year I booked a um a trip to a nudie resort in Palm Springs for my birthday.
53:23
SPEAKER_01: That's so fun.
53:23
SPEAKER_01: I've always kind of wanted always kinda wanted to go to one of those thingies.
53:28
SPEAKER_01: You should.
53:31
SPEAKER_01: And you should.
53:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
53:32
SPEAKER_01: Are you a nudist a little bit?
53:34
SPEAKER_02: I think just horny.
53:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
53:36
SPEAKER_02: There's a fine line between nudist and horny.
53:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I well, or is there a huge line between nudist and horny?
53:40
SPEAKER_01: It might be huge.
53:41
SPEAKER_01: Depends where you're going.
53:42
SPEAKER_03: Well, I feel like the fineness of the lineness is that there's nudity involved in both.
53:47
SPEAKER_03: Right, right, right, right.
53:48
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
53:48
SPEAKER_03: Hopefully, when you're horny.
53:49
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
53:49
SPEAKER_03: Um, for me, I thought it's less.
53:51
SPEAKER_03: I mean, part I guess part of it is bot the body acceptance of it all that once everybody's naked, it's like sort of like the, I don't know, constraints of the world feel lifted a little bit because it's like, well, everyone's fucking naked and like no one's making a big deal out of anyone.
54:05
SPEAKER_03: So why would they about you?
54:07
SPEAKER_01: Bodies.
54:07
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
54:08
SPEAKER_03: It's just fucking bodies.
54:09
SPEAKER_03: To go to a gay resort that is naked like that, it's like it's it's still in my wildest dreams that it exists.
54:19
SPEAKER_03: Like, I still part of my brain is the like 13-year-old in St.
54:23
SPEAKER_03: Louis, Missouri, who thought that the world was just really straight and you were the only gay one in it.
54:31
SPEAKER_03: And then it'd be like, oh my god, there's other horny gay guys that want to be naked by a pool.
54:35
SPEAKER_03: How lucky are we?
54:37
SPEAKER_01: There's a slide.
54:40
SPEAKER_02: No, I do still feel sometimes.
54:42
SPEAKER_02: I'm like, is it is that losery to be like the novelty of gay life is sometimes so affirming and fun and like cool that it makes me feel good, or is it just no, we're allowed to say that.
54:51
SPEAKER_02: We're allowed to say that.
54:52
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we're allowed to say that, but it's not true.
54:53
SPEAKER_03: And I think we're allowed to say, like, we the luckiness that we got is that our community, part of the like like the actual uh subtext is that we're rebelling against mainstream.
55:04
SPEAKER_03: And so, and then by rebelling, we're doing the more fun shit.
55:07
SPEAKER_03: So at least our community has like fun shit to uh play with naked, fucking under a pier in Provincetown.
55:15
SPEAKER_03: Sure.
55:16
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, not every gay person has to do that, but if they want to, they can.
55:21
SPEAKER_03: It's there.
55:22
SPEAKER_03: Or are we rebelling by from the straight world by being like having amazing taste and designing a gorgeous room?
55:28
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
55:29
SPEAKER_03: Like we are benefiting from like gay people's traumas, making them really high achieving and creative.
55:35
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
55:35
SPEAKER_03: At least that's how we're dealing.
55:36
SPEAKER_03: Now, are we dealing with maybe some drug abuse and um sex addiction?
55:40
SPEAKER_03: Sure.
55:40
SPEAKER_03: But we don't have to talk about that.
55:41
SPEAKER_02: But I'm like, but who's not?
55:42
SPEAKER_03: And it's like, wait, actually, I guess like a lot of people.
55:44
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
55:46
SPEAKER_02: Well, I don't know.
55:46
SPEAKER_02: Sometimes I'm like, I think about like the day-to-day struggles that non-monogamous, sex-positive gay guys are dealing with.
55:52
SPEAKER_02: And I think about like my straight relatives.
55:54
SPEAKER_02: And it's like, oh, that's just like nothing.
55:56
SPEAKER_01: They're addicted to food.
55:58
SPEAKER_01: That's like pathobic.
56:00
SPEAKER_01: But you know, anyone, you know, anything, anything, every everyone has struggles, right?
56:04
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, and we're back.
56:05
SPEAKER_02: I think that's what we have to say.
56:06
SPEAKER_02: Uh, we're back from the break.
56:08
SPEAKER_02: That was that's called the dying.
56:10
SPEAKER_03: Loose, uh loose open.
56:12
SPEAKER_03: My favorite kind.
56:13
SPEAKER_01: I'm dying.
56:13
SPEAKER_01: Sorry, because my mom always thinks I'm like a raging alcoholic, and like, where's the lie?
56:17
SPEAKER_01: High functioning?
56:18
SPEAKER_01: I'm always very high functioning, very.
56:20
SPEAKER_01: So I always have that in my back pocket.
56:22
SPEAKER_01: Like, well, you're addicted to food.
56:24
SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
56:25
SPEAKER_01: So that's always ready to go because it's just like a oh and that's the Italian warrior in you.
56:31
SPEAKER_02: The warrior, not the warrior.
56:32
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, that's a good thing.
56:33
SPEAKER_02: Oh, good call box a warrior.
56:34
SPEAKER_02: I think that was important.
56:35
SPEAKER_03: And I think warrior needs to be part of sort of common.
56:38
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
56:39
SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
56:39
SPEAKER_03: She's a warrior.
56:40
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
56:40
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
56:40
SPEAKER_02: She fights.
56:41
SPEAKER_02: Um, and we're back, and we can um we can play one of our three games.
56:48
SPEAKER_02: Uh, counter punt, label whores, or we can play divas on a cliff.
56:52
SPEAKER_03: Okay, here's what we want.
56:52
SPEAKER_03: Can I order?
56:53
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
56:54
SPEAKER_03: I'm ready to order.
56:54
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
56:55
SPEAKER_03: I would like to uh start with the um counter punt and then feel free to only do a few of those as a warm-up because the divas on a fucking cliff need to be played.
57:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
57:08
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
57:09
SPEAKER_02: Is that an okay order?
57:10
SPEAKER_02: Excellent choice.
57:10
SPEAKER_02: Excellent choice.
57:11
SPEAKER_02: Can I do okay?
57:12
SPEAKER_02: I for once have a counter punt to just kick these off.
57:14
SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay, cool.
57:15
SPEAKER_02: Something that is.
57:16
SPEAKER_01: Usually I'm left here hanging.
57:17
SPEAKER_01: I know, like a diva.
57:18
SPEAKER_02: I'm like, now go.
57:20
SPEAKER_02: Uh counter punt biting the fork when you are eating food.
57:25
SPEAKER_02: I mean, how could that ever be gunt?
57:29
SPEAKER_02: Well.
57:30
SPEAKER_01: Wait, what do you mean biting the fork?
57:31
SPEAKER_02: You know how there are people, like like your mom or like your aunt, who like she gets her pasta and she's like and plucks it out.
57:39
SPEAKER_01: What you're describing is.
57:40
SPEAKER_01: Don't make fun of my mom's food problem.
57:43
SPEAKER_01: She can be addicted to food.
57:44
SPEAKER_01: She's like moderately like plump.
57:46
SPEAKER_01: She's she's normal.
57:47
SPEAKER_02: Your mom looks great.
57:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, she's headed.
57:49
SPEAKER_02: Don't call your mom moderately.
57:50
SPEAKER_01: But I'm building, I'm building it up like thousand-pound sisters, a little bit, which is beautiful, but go on.
57:56
SPEAKER_01: Shut the fuck up.
57:58
SPEAKER_03: I love how we're so afraid of getting cancer.
58:00
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
58:02
SPEAKER_03: Which is beautiful.
58:04
SPEAKER_03: You know, you're describing misophonia, which is the uh the fear or like the disgust of hearing people's mouth noises when they eat.
58:12
SPEAKER_03: And the the the teeth the teeth on the fork is a friend of mine.
58:16
SPEAKER_03: I'm I'm speaking on behalf of the misophonic community because I know someone who is a part of it.
58:22
SPEAKER_03: And he has said that that offense it like ranks very, very high up for them.
58:27
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
58:28
SPEAKER_03: So I'm gonna punt it for the misophonics out there.
58:31
SPEAKER_03: Right.
58:31
SPEAKER_02: Personally, I don't give a fuck.
58:33
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, because see, here's the thing.
58:34
SPEAKER_02: In my mind, I'm like, that's disgusting and horrible, and please never do it in front of me.
58:37
SPEAKER_02: But but there is a thing where, like, in a scene, an actor will be like Exactly.
58:43
SPEAKER_02: Like, think about like showgirls.
58:44
SPEAKER_02: I feel like they're constantly biting the fork and show you.
58:47
SPEAKER_01: Press down and pull, like that's okay.
58:48
SPEAKER_01: Is that lumped in with your you're hearing basically the teeth that go on?
58:52
SPEAKER_02: Because I always hear it.
58:53
SPEAKER_02: Teeth on metal, teeth on metal, teeth on metal pull, teeth on metal pull.
58:57
SPEAKER_01: Cunt.
58:58
SPEAKER_02: Punt?
58:59
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
58:59
SPEAKER_02: I think I think like in reality it's punt, but I feel like sometimes there's a way to play it that's clear.
59:03
SPEAKER_03: There's a wiggle, there's a wiggle room.
59:04
SPEAKER_03: I agree.
59:05
SPEAKER_03: I think there's a wiggle room.
59:06
SPEAKER_02: Scene work?
59:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it could be, it could be cunt, but in reality it's it's punt.
59:09
SPEAKER_02: And I feel like you have to have good teeth to be playing around with that bullshit.
59:13
SPEAKER_03: Well, it's also just like people who are unaware of like have no spatial awareness.
59:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
59:18
SPEAKER_03: Like you're allowed to keep your teeth separate while you eat sweets.
59:22
SPEAKER_03: Like, yeah.
59:22
SPEAKER_03: The only time it's okay is if you have a chocolate cookie skillet with vanilla ice cream on top and it's a spoon.
59:29
SPEAKER_03: You gotta scrape the chocolate off the spoon.
59:32
SPEAKER_02: We're very pro-cookie skillet on the couch.
59:34
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
59:35
SPEAKER_02: Not the first time we've talked about it.
59:37
SPEAKER_03: Really?
59:38
SPEAKER_03: I swear to God, this is probably the first time I've talked about my.
59:43
SPEAKER_02: And again, wait, I guess I'm fucking poor because I we I love cookie cake, okay?
59:49
SPEAKER_02: Okay, I love cookie cake too.
59:50
SPEAKER_02: I'm just kidding.
59:52
SPEAKER_03: She's poor, she's poor.
59:53
SPEAKER_03: She's poor.
59:53
SPEAKER_03: Um, I know I I totally had cookie cake growing up and like still I with blue icing because it was for boys from the mall.
1:00:00
SPEAKER_01: Like it was only available at the mall.
1:00:01
SPEAKER_02: No, it was available at the male.
1:00:03
SPEAKER_03: Well, you're also picturing walking by Mrs.
1:00:04
SPEAKER_03: Fields or like the Great American Cookie Company or whatever that's called.
1:00:07
SPEAKER_03: And they would at the window would always have these big things.
1:00:09
SPEAKER_03: They were pushing those cookie cakes.
1:00:11
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, Mrs.
1:00:11
SPEAKER_03: Fields is actually one of my like like a fond uh mall memory because I would go with my mom and because she also was addicted to sugar, much like the child the children she raised.
1:00:23
SPEAKER_02: And was she moderately plump as well?
1:00:25
SPEAKER_03: Or we're not gonna say that on the curvy and swervy?
1:00:27
SPEAKER_03: She's actually like a five foot tall, tiny Jewish woman.
1:00:31
SPEAKER_03: Skipping tiny.
1:00:32
SPEAKER_03: I knew it.
1:00:33
SPEAKER_03: I'm telling I'm I'm not joking, like 4'11.
1:00:35
SPEAKER_03: Well, based off of the family photos that you had in your show, you seem you are the outlier.
1:00:39
SPEAKER_03: You are the outlier.
1:00:40
SPEAKER_01: As someone who's short and never like had a girl spurt, that's so cool and horny that you're like taller than your twin, like a lot taller.
1:00:45
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it was like always a re it was always a reality that like I I don't think it felt horny until much later.
1:00:52
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:00:52
SPEAKER_03: I guess I guess at times it was like kind of fun to really push at his buttons because he at the time was like a straight kid who was proving his straightness.
1:01:02
SPEAKER_03: So if I did make fun of his height, I could tell it got to him.
1:01:05
SPEAKER_03: That's but like if I still do it to this day, I see a glint of devastation in his eye.
1:01:10
SPEAKER_03: Like, like now, do you guys have twin wings?
1:01:14
SPEAKER_01: May I ask?
1:01:14
SPEAKER_03: I've never I've never seen his.
1:01:16
SPEAKER_03: Oh really?
1:01:16
SPEAKER_01: Not on the pod.
1:01:17
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
1:01:18
SPEAKER_03: I think you actually can ask that.
1:01:19
SPEAKER_01: It's like well, cause it only because it's twins.
1:01:22
SPEAKER_01: We're not talking brothers, we're talking about.
1:01:23
SPEAKER_03: Well, I think if we're on a cunty couch and I'm like a gay guy always talking about this stuff, like and cause the answer is what the answer is.
1:01:29
SPEAKER_03: If the answer was different, I'd feel a little bit like if I was like, uh maybe.
1:01:34
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
1:01:35
SPEAKER_03: The answer is you don't know.
1:01:35
SPEAKER_03: The answer is I fully don't know.
1:01:37
SPEAKER_03: Cause like I I could not.
1:01:39
SPEAKER_03: I mean, obviously we saw each other's penises until we were like whatever appropriate age that would have been.
1:01:44
SPEAKER_02: Um you're like 27?
1:01:46
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, what's that age?
1:01:46
SPEAKER_03: 20, 28?
1:01:47
SPEAKER_01: Um Jewish, Italian, eh?
1:01:49
SPEAKER_01: 28.
1:01:50
SPEAKER_01: Well, I'm sure some like I'm still taking a bath.
1:01:54
SPEAKER_01: Gee, but my sisters, just kidding.
1:01:56
SPEAKER_01: That's crazy.
1:01:57
SPEAKER_01: Continue.
1:01:58
SPEAKER_01: You do bathe, Bianca, don't you?
1:01:59
SPEAKER_01: Yes, I do.
1:02:00
SPEAKER_01: That's crazy.
1:02:01
SPEAKER_03: I don't take baths ever.
1:02:02
SPEAKER_03: Um, no, yeah, I I have no idea.
1:02:04
SPEAKER_03: No idea.
1:02:05
SPEAKER_03: I mean, but we like, if I were to like take a guess, there'd be zero uh similarity because we are just in every facet of our bodies.
1:02:11
SPEAKER_01: Like that's what I was wondering.
1:02:12
SPEAKER_03: I if I if you sometimes look at different types of photos of me with my family, it sometimes looks like I'm photoshopped because my just like body parts are bigger.
1:02:20
SPEAKER_03: Wow.
1:02:21
SPEAKER_01: Something happened.
1:02:22
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:02:22
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:02:22
SPEAKER_01: Something like something like a lot of nutrients.
1:02:25
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
1:02:26
SPEAKER_01: That's what they that's what they say.
1:02:27
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:02:28
SPEAKER_01: Cookie skillet, cont or punt.
1:02:31
SPEAKER_01: Cunt.
1:02:31
SPEAKER_01: Unanimous cunt.
1:02:32
SPEAKER_01: Cunt, cunt.
1:02:33
SPEAKER_01: Are we talking like Chicago Uno's pizza?
1:02:35
SPEAKER_01: Like, did we know that?
1:02:36
SPEAKER_01: Dessert?
1:02:37
SPEAKER_01: It's a little embarrassing.
1:02:38
SPEAKER_01: What?
1:02:38
SPEAKER_01: What is to like have to or the cookie skillet?
1:02:41
SPEAKER_01: The cookie skillet at Uno?
1:02:43
SPEAKER_01: Anywhere now, I guess.
1:02:44
SPEAKER_01: In general.
1:02:45
SPEAKER_03: Embarrassing.
1:02:46
SPEAKER_03: Okay, let's speak more to this.
1:02:47
SPEAKER_03: What's embarrassing about it?
1:02:48
SPEAKER_03: The fact that it's in a skillet, for one.
1:02:49
SPEAKER_03: There's like a beside.
1:02:50
SPEAKER_03: But what are you embarrassing?
1:02:51
SPEAKER_03: Is it is it only that there's two people eating it?
1:02:53
SPEAKER_03: Is it that people see tell me more.
1:02:54
SPEAKER_02: If it just came like a big cookie for dessert, not nothing embarrassing about that.
1:02:58
SPEAKER_02: It has basic bitch energy.
1:02:59
SPEAKER_02: But if you get a cookie skillet.
1:03:01
SPEAKER_02: Okay, let me tell you something.
1:03:02
SPEAKER_01: You're so right.
1:03:03
SPEAKER_01: We were gonna scream cunt, I think.
1:03:05
SPEAKER_01: Well, I you can still, we don't have to agree.
1:03:07
SPEAKER_03: I say cunt with caveat.
1:03:09
SPEAKER_03: My caveat, my cunted caveat is that you can do it by yourself when you're out of town.
1:03:15
SPEAKER_03: Because I was recently on like a work trip for my day job.
1:03:18
SPEAKER_03: What are you gonna do?
1:03:19
SPEAKER_03: Not get the cookie skillet?
1:03:20
SPEAKER_03: No.
1:03:21
SPEAKER_01: No.
1:03:21
SPEAKER_01: No.
1:03:21
SPEAKER_03: So that's my you're right, you're right.
1:03:23
SPEAKER_03: That's your cunt cunt caveat.
1:03:24
SPEAKER_03: Cunt caveat.
1:03:25
SPEAKER_01: You can get a cookie skillet alone, but a lava cake alone is dark.
1:03:29
SPEAKER_01: You know?
1:03:30
SPEAKER_01: I'm cunt.
1:03:30
SPEAKER_03: I'm cunt for lava cake.
1:03:32
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
1:03:32
SPEAKER_03: I think that I some of my biggest joys in life are uh sh su of the sugar variety.
1:03:38
SPEAKER_03: And so I'm gonna defend the girl inside that orders the lava cake by myself.
1:03:45
SPEAKER_03: Is it right or is it good?
1:03:48
SPEAKER_03: Not for me to decide.
1:03:49
SPEAKER_03: Right.
1:03:49
SPEAKER_03: It's not up to it.
1:03:50
SPEAKER_03: At this juncture, it's not up to me to decide.
1:03:52
SPEAKER_03: In fact, what the truth is, it's what I decided is.
1:03:54
SPEAKER_03: And the truth that I decide is is that a lava cake is something I deserve and will be finishing.
1:04:01
SPEAKER_03: So we did we did uh biting the fork, cookie skillet.
1:04:04
SPEAKER_01: Anybody got a third one?
1:04:05
SPEAKER_02: If I have one.
1:04:07
SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
1:04:07
SPEAKER_01: Um long sleeve shirt with shorts.
1:04:10
SPEAKER_03: I think it's cunt because it reminds me of it reminds me of New England call collegiate hottie walking through the quad with his sort of waffle long sleeve shirt with the shorts.
1:04:25
SPEAKER_01: It's very hetero, I feel.
1:04:26
SPEAKER_03: That's what it is.
1:04:27
SPEAKER_03: I'm romanticizing.
1:04:29
SPEAKER_02: Why do you have it written down at all?
1:04:30
SPEAKER_02: What's what's let's break that down because I'm a stoner?
1:04:32
SPEAKER_02: Because it's like what what pegged what like pinged for you there?
1:04:35
SPEAKER_01: Because I would never do that.
1:04:36
SPEAKER_01: I feel like I'm not a shorts guy.
1:04:37
SPEAKER_01: Like I I'm always in a t-shirt and jeans.
1:04:40
SPEAKER_02: You also never dress appropriately for the weather.
1:04:43
SPEAKER_02: You are always like this?
1:04:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you're always like this.
1:04:46
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:04:47
SPEAKER_02: No, you like won't wear a jacket when it's freezing.
1:04:50
SPEAKER_02: You'll have like a t-shirt.
1:04:51
SPEAKER_01: Well, I run 10,000 degrees.
1:04:52
SPEAKER_02: You do, yeah.
1:04:53
SPEAKER_02: So I guess for you, you would never have any reason to wear hetero.
1:04:56
SPEAKER_02: Oh, just be crazy to me.
1:04:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
1:04:58
SPEAKER_01: It's giving like soccer girl or hetero guy.
1:05:02
SPEAKER_03: Soccer girl or hetero guy.
1:05:04
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:05:05
SPEAKER_03: And my best friend growing up was soccer girl.
1:05:07
SPEAKER_01: My sister like wanted to be soccer girl.
1:05:09
SPEAKER_03: Les?
1:05:09
SPEAKER_03: No.
1:05:10
SPEAKER_03: Well.
1:05:10
SPEAKER_03: So that's why she wanted to be a girl.
1:05:12
SPEAKER_03: Or so closeted she doesn't know it.
1:05:14
SPEAKER_01: Which one?
1:05:15
SPEAKER_01: Not Les.
1:05:15
SPEAKER_01: I feel like she's uh a slave for the cock.
1:05:20
SPEAKER_03: I hope people describe me that way.
1:05:21
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:05:22
SPEAKER_03: And they do.
1:05:22
SPEAKER_03: They do, yeah.
1:05:23
SPEAKER_01: They do, they do, they do.
1:05:24
SPEAKER_01: And they do.
1:05:25
SPEAKER_01: Um, Bianca, like, wait, my oldest sister was the first one to try anal.
1:05:31
SPEAKER_01: And she like let us know at a young age.
1:05:33
SPEAKER_01: Young age?
1:05:34
SPEAKER_01: Her name's Bianca.
1:05:35
SPEAKER_01: So it's like, if your name's Bianca, you like love you anal.
1:05:39
SPEAKER_01: You're gonna try.
1:05:40
SPEAKER_01: You're gonna Bianca Del Rio.
1:05:42
SPEAKER_02: She's like, I'm a top! Uh classic Bianca line.
1:05:45
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:05:46
SPEAKER_02: Um well that's cunt or punt.
1:05:47
SPEAKER_02: Uh should we should we move on?
1:05:49
SPEAKER_02: Wait, what was yours?
1:05:50
SPEAKER_02: You didn't answer.
1:05:50
SPEAKER_02: Oh, I don't really embarrassed about it.
1:05:53
SPEAKER_02: I n I don't think it's cunt or punt.
1:05:55
SPEAKER_02: It's like I don't find I'm not if someone's wearing a long sleeve shirt and pants and shorts, I'm not like
1:06:00
SPEAKER_00: Yes!
1:06:00
SPEAKER_02: I'm not like screaming.
1:06:01
SPEAKER_02: I'm not living for that.
1:06:03
SPEAKER_00: Yes, do that work.
1:06:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh, you're bad.
1:06:06
SPEAKER_02: And I'm not punting it either.
1:06:07
SPEAKER_02: So it's like straight guy running away from you?
1:06:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:06:09
SPEAKER_00: Like, yes, be that's the guy!
1:06:11
SPEAKER_02: What about soccer girls?
1:06:12
SPEAKER_02: Soccer girls is cunt for them.
1:06:14
SPEAKER_02: For them.
1:06:15
SPEAKER_02: No, no, no.
1:06:15
SPEAKER_02: In general.
1:06:16
SPEAKER_02: What do you mean?
1:06:16
SPEAKER_02: A soccer girl is cunt.
1:06:18
SPEAKER_02: A soccer girl is cunt.
1:06:18
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:06:19
SPEAKER_03: Because they could beat you up.
1:06:20
SPEAKER_03: I honestly, every soccer girl I've met, I've been uh really into.
1:06:23
SPEAKER_01: There were some butch soccer girls, but they were all straight.
1:06:26
SPEAKER_01: It was so fun.
1:06:26
SPEAKER_01: But I love that too.
1:06:28
SPEAKER_01: Like let the straight girls be butched.
1:06:30
SPEAKER_01: I love a butch straight girl.
1:06:32
SPEAKER_01: It's my mom.
1:06:35
SPEAKER_01: I'm getting a clear and clearer picture.
1:06:38
SPEAKER_01: She's a monster.
1:06:39
SPEAKER_01: Based on everything I'm saying.
1:06:41
SPEAKER_01: Um, no, she's she's the dubom.
1:06:46
SPEAKER_01: Cunt.
1:06:50
SPEAKER_02: Your mom is dubom.
1:06:51
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I tried.
1:06:57
SPEAKER_02: We're in the kooky zone.
1:06:59
SPEAKER_02: In the cookie zone.
1:06:59
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we'll do divas on a cliff because you had said you want to.
1:07:01
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, divas on a cliff.
1:07:02
SPEAKER_02: Okay, so it could literally be anything.
1:07:04
SPEAKER_02: It could be like anal, blowjobs, hand jobs, and uh regular jobs.
1:07:10
SPEAKER_02: Nine to five.
1:07:11
SPEAKER_02: And then I'm allowed to keep how many?
1:07:12
SPEAKER_03: Just one?
1:07:13
SPEAKER_03: You can only keep one.
1:07:14
SPEAKER_03: Blow jobs, hand jobs, and penetrative size.
1:07:16
SPEAKER_03: Am I missing one?
1:07:17
SPEAKER_03: What am I?
1:07:17
SPEAKER_03: Blow hand pen.
1:07:19
SPEAKER_02: Blow hand pen.
1:07:21
SPEAKER_03: I think that's it.
1:07:22
SPEAKER_02: I know I'm I'm knocking off first.
1:07:24
SPEAKER_02: Me too.
1:07:25
SPEAKER_02: What's what are you getting rid of first?
1:07:27
SPEAKER_02: Blow jobs.
1:07:27
SPEAKER_01: Same.
1:07:28
SPEAKER_01: It's kind of hard because it's like who's giving, who's receiving.
1:07:31
SPEAKER_02: Oh, whoa.
1:07:32
SPEAKER_02: Okay, hold on.
1:07:33
SPEAKER_02: That changes everything.
1:07:34
SPEAKER_01: Right.
1:07:34
SPEAKER_01: Let me guess.
1:07:35
SPEAKER_01: You like to suck dick?
1:07:38
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I do.
1:07:39
SPEAKER_02: I would I prefer to suck than be sucked, I would say.
1:07:41
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:42
SPEAKER_02: Same.
1:07:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
1:07:43
SPEAKER_03: I asked that question on my um horny interviews about like, yeah, I say, do you prefer to be suck or suck head, rim or rim ed?
1:07:50
SPEAKER_03: I've only interviewed one person who was 50-50.
1:07:52
SPEAKER_03: Prefer to suck and be sucked.
1:07:54
SPEAKER_03: Wow.
1:07:54
SPEAKER_03: Like it was very even.
1:07:55
SPEAKER_03: But most people are like, Yeah.
1:07:57
SPEAKER_03: Really lean.
1:07:58
SPEAKER_01: And what do you find do you find one more than the other?
1:08:00
SPEAKER_03: I actually have never answered it for myself.
1:08:02
SPEAKER_03: And I guess.
1:08:04
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I'm definitely like doing both, but I I mean I guess I enjoy receiving.
1:08:10
SPEAKER_00: Ooh, good for you.
1:08:12
SPEAKER_00: We're like, ah! Hi! Okay, cool.
1:08:14
SPEAKER_00: Good to know.
1:08:15
SPEAKER_03: Um yeah.
1:08:17
SPEAKER_03: I like to give.
1:08:18
SPEAKER_03: I like to give.
1:08:19
SPEAKER_03: Well, you guys are performers.
1:08:20
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:08:20
SPEAKER_00: Well, three.
1:08:22
SPEAKER_03: But and selfish, I guess.
1:08:24
SPEAKER_03: I feel like it's yeah, it's kind of like that's a harder, it's a harder answer to give.
1:08:28
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:08:29
SPEAKER_03: Because there's like an inherent, like no, I don't think there's any judgment.
1:08:32
SPEAKER_03: So I think it I re I think it really boils down to like, do you physically enjoy it?
1:08:35
SPEAKER_02: I guess.
1:08:36
SPEAKER_03: No, I've just really been looking at it.
1:08:37
SPEAKER_01: I need like a vacuum seal, like a vacuum sock.
1:08:40
SPEAKER_01: And that's atypical.
1:08:41
SPEAKER_01: I was like, I need a vacuum.
1:08:42
SPEAKER_01: So that's why I use a vacuum.
1:08:44
SPEAKER_01: I put it in the vacuum.
1:08:46
SPEAKER_01: I need a vacuum sock.
1:08:47
SPEAKER_02: Your classic line is it needs to go in bigger than come out bigger than it went in.
1:08:53
SPEAKER_01: But it's like, what are you talking?
1:08:54
SPEAKER_01: What does that mean?
1:08:55
SPEAKER_03: Well, you're saying is you need to be such a well-done job.
1:08:58
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:08:59
SPEAKER_03: They're pulling a rabbit out of a hat and making you grow 10 inches.
1:09:02
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
1:09:03
SPEAKER_02: That's what I need.
1:09:04
SPEAKER_02: But I'm like, sometimes really good head makes your dick dick kind of like not super hard.
1:09:08
SPEAKER_03: I don't know how you know what I mean?
1:09:09
SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
1:09:10
SPEAKER_03: Like I know what you mean.
1:09:12
SPEAKER_03: Um, but I I think it's bodies.
1:09:15
SPEAKER_03: I think it's bodies and brains.
1:09:16
SPEAKER_03: I think it's bodies and brains.
1:09:18
SPEAKER_03: And some bodies respond better to the receiving or the giving.
1:09:22
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:09:22
SPEAKER_03: So we you have taken off blow drops from blow blow hand and pen.
1:09:28
SPEAKER_03: Should we add rim?
1:09:28
SPEAKER_03: We can add rim.
1:09:29
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
1:09:30
SPEAKER_03: Because I was.
1:09:30
SPEAKER_01: I still think I'd just go and blow first.
1:09:32
SPEAKER_01: Rim is a diva for sure.
1:09:33
SPEAKER_03: You're getting rid of blow first, and I guess I'm gonna get rid of rim first.
1:09:39
SPEAKER_03: Wow.
1:09:39
SPEAKER_03: I'm like, do you wanna put it on?
1:09:40
SPEAKER_03: I'm putting I'm getting rid of it.
1:09:41
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:09:41
SPEAKER_03: Um, I want to get rid of rim.
1:09:42
SPEAKER_01: I think I'd rather eat ass than get Ian.
1:09:45
SPEAKER_01: Same.
1:09:46
SPEAKER_01: Because again, I feel like I'm just like a I don't know.
1:09:49
SPEAKER_01: I'd be like, uh I know it's probably way too clean, but like it's just stressful maybe for me back there.
1:09:56
SPEAKER_02: I'm 50-50 on that.
1:09:57
SPEAKER_02: I think it's hot for someone to want to do it to me.
1:10:00
SPEAKER_02: It's like if you want to do it, go off.
1:10:03
SPEAKER_02: But it's hotter for me to do it to someone, I I think.
1:10:06
SPEAKER_02: I'm not I'm not like I'm like, hey, get over here and rim me.
1:10:09
SPEAKER_02: That's not my on my must-have list.
1:10:12
SPEAKER_02: That's not on my writer.
1:10:13
SPEAKER_03: Okay, so then what goes for you after you take off blowjob?
1:10:17
SPEAKER_02: Well, see, this is hard because I love hand jobs, so I I think it would have to be rim.
1:10:24
SPEAKER_03: I'm working on a uh essay right now uh about um uh in defense of hand stuff.
1:10:30
SPEAKER_03: I think hand stuff is having a renaissance.
1:10:33
SPEAKER_03: I would say.
1:10:33
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I think that it deserves every ounce of respect it's getting.
1:10:38
SPEAKER_03: And more.
1:10:39
SPEAKER_01: We've always liked hand jobs more.
1:10:41
SPEAKER_02: I didn't know that about you.
1:10:42
SPEAKER_02: Yes, you did.
1:10:44
SPEAKER_02: Over blowjobs?
1:10:45
SPEAKER_02: Well, over blowjobs, yeah.
1:10:46
SPEAKER_02: What else is there?
1:10:46
SPEAKER_02: I just I think I thought you were hand job, hand job neutral.
1:10:50
SPEAKER_01: I guess I am kinda.
1:10:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:10:52
SPEAKER_01: Immediately changed my mind.
1:10:54
SPEAKER_02: I don't care.
1:10:54
SPEAKER_02: But okay, so then I guess I would have to so blowjobs go off first and then rim jobs after that.
1:11:00
SPEAKER_03: I guess I'm gonna get rid of I'm getting rid of rim job first, and then the other two are penetration, hand blogge.
1:11:08
SPEAKER_03: Blowge.
1:11:09
SPEAKER_03: God, this game is hard.
1:11:10
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
1:11:11
SPEAKER_02: These are these are these are some divas.
1:11:12
SPEAKER_02: These are our you know generational talents.
1:11:15
SPEAKER_03: You know, I'm gonna I'm gonna get rid of, I guess, blow job, and then I'm gonna get rid of I guess I'm gonna get rid of penetrative and Kev Hansby first.
1:11:25
SPEAKER_03: Wow.
1:11:25
SPEAKER_03: Wow.
1:11:26
SPEAKER_03: I almost would think you'd say the same.
1:11:28
SPEAKER_03: Well, it's really, really, really hard.
1:11:30
SPEAKER_03: Think about the percentage of hand stuff in the pie chart of It's 99% for me.
1:11:37
SPEAKER_03: And like with yourself and I guess I have to go, I have to go hand.
1:11:40
SPEAKER_03: I like penetrative sex.
1:11:42
SPEAKER_03: So does that mean you enjoy topping?
1:11:44
SPEAKER_01: I had a lot, yeah.
1:11:44
SPEAKER_01: I'm more of a top, believe it or not.
1:11:47
SPEAKER_01: Uh yeah, I feel like my instinct is to Well, have you been inside of Jean?
1:11:52
SPEAKER_03: For years.
1:11:53
SPEAKER_03: Four years?
1:11:54
SPEAKER_01: No, four years, more than four or ten almost.
1:11:57
SPEAKER_01: I came out late in life.
1:11:58
SPEAKER_03: Oh, so you before that were having sex with vaginas?
1:12:01
SPEAKER_01: Like eight years ago.
1:12:02
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
1:12:03
SPEAKER_03: Crazy, huh?
1:12:04
SPEAKER_03: Have you done it since then?
1:12:05
SPEAKER_03: No.
1:12:06
SPEAKER_01: Actually.
1:12:08
SPEAKER_01: Roll the tapes.
1:12:09
SPEAKER_01: Maybe once in there.
1:12:10
SPEAKER_01: Roll the tapes.
1:12:11
SPEAKER_01: Once in there.
1:12:13
SPEAKER_01: And it was bad.
1:12:14
SPEAKER_01: I was laughing.
1:12:15
SPEAKER_01: Because I was um high, you know, like I don't know.
1:12:18
SPEAKER_01: I was just I was kind of having a laugh.
1:12:20
SPEAKER_03: She's like, what the how?
1:12:21
SPEAKER_03: She's share horror with me.
1:12:24
SPEAKER_01: Also, my first gay relationship, I was so spoiled because I I I don't know, he just bottomed a ton.
1:12:31
SPEAKER_01: We used to have penetrative sex like four times a night.
1:12:34
SPEAKER_01: And it was crazy.
1:12:36
SPEAKER_01: Not exaggerating.
1:12:37
SPEAKER_01: He was just often very, very night for like a year and a half.
1:12:42
SPEAKER_01: That's insane.
1:12:43
SPEAKER_01: A lot.
1:12:44
SPEAKER_01: That was I'm not exaggerating.
1:12:45
SPEAKER_01: Like some nights obviously wouldn't it would go down to one night, once a night, you know.
1:12:50
SPEAKER_01: But for a lot of for a long time, we were doing it multiple times a night.
1:12:54
SPEAKER_03: And was he douching yeah, he was douching every day for sure.
1:12:57
SPEAKER_03: Well, that's an Olympic athlete right there.
1:12:59
SPEAKER_02: I think I'll put handjobs first.
1:13:00
SPEAKER_02: I think I I think I will.
1:13:01
SPEAKER_02: I'll think I'll I'll I'll I'll be true to myself and and do hand jobs first.
1:13:05
SPEAKER_02: I love a hand job, but yeah.
1:13:07
SPEAKER_02: Because at the end of the day, I could make a living doing giving and receiving handjobs.
1:13:10
SPEAKER_02: And you've tried.
1:13:11
SPEAKER_02: No, no, I never have, but I could.
1:13:13
SPEAKER_01: You should try.
1:13:14
SPEAKER_01: I should if you're interested in it.
1:13:15
SPEAKER_01: But do you guys ever have like the feminine urge to post poll on Twitter for no reason?
1:13:18
SPEAKER_01: Like the feminine urge?
1:13:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:13:20
SPEAKER_01: Of course.
1:13:21
SPEAKER_03: I mean, like, yeah, I feel like oh, you know what I've done?
1:13:23
SPEAKER_03: That's like really kind of nuts is that I know I've um if I've taken a photo maybe for someone, I will then like open Instagram, go to my stories and just like hold it there.
1:13:36
SPEAKER_03: Not even hold it there, just like if I like scroll to post something else, I'll be like, what if I accidentally, and of course I will never because like you're a Virgo.
1:13:44
SPEAKER_03: I'm a Virgo.
1:13:45
SPEAKER_01: Although I have a story, actually.
1:13:47
SPEAKER_01: Continue though.
1:13:48
SPEAKER_03: Well, I just that's like really, yeah, that that's like my like a little adrenaline pump.
1:13:52
SPEAKER_03: I'm like, oh my god, that was crazy.
1:13:54
SPEAKER_01: And then I So when you open it up, yeah, it's in the reset, you know, and you're like so I'm like, what if I just yeah, yeah, I know that feeling.
1:14:00
SPEAKER_03: Oh no, and I think when I see like hot guys on Twitter, I'm like, yeah, I what would that world look like?
1:14:05
SPEAKER_03: It's there's so many sides to it though, because I feel like some people are doing it from a very empowering place and other people are like really filling a void.
1:14:11
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:14:11
SPEAKER_03: And so like I would only want to do it if I was like, I'm a fucking sex worker, yeah.
1:14:18
SPEAKER_03: Owning my shit.
1:14:19
SPEAKER_03: Right.
1:14:19
SPEAKER_03: This is liberation, not like please like this.
1:14:22
SPEAKER_02: It's like if you posted a a a fire nude that no one liked, how would that feel?
1:14:27
SPEAKER_03: You have to really get like people, which people do, and I feel like I guess caveat for what I said is that I don't think you need to be a sex worker to post nudes.
1:14:35
SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
1:14:35
SPEAKER_03: But I think like when it comes from a place of like true, just like this feels good to post, which I think a lot, a lot of guys are like that, and that's why it's so fun to look at.
1:14:43
SPEAKER_03: But there is, I think, yeah, some people that I just like my anxiety tells me I would fall into the camp of like just doing it for self-esteem reasons.
1:14:50
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
1:14:51
SPEAKER_03: Which is a low vibrational reason to do that.
1:14:54
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, for sure.
1:14:55
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:14:55
SPEAKER_03: Shout out to good nudes, though.
1:14:57
SPEAKER_03: Shout out to it.
1:14:58
SPEAKER_02: It sounds like none of us have have the energy to just toss it out there and be the uh it well to me, it's very, it's very like um uh the way I'm planning my birthday party vibes, where it's like, don't want it to be a big flop, so I'm gonna I'm gonna go small.
1:15:09
SPEAKER_02: That's like the so I'm not gonna post the nude because I don't want to have the negative reception of uh having it not yeah, go viral.
1:15:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:15:19
SPEAKER_03: Who is the between the two of you?
1:15:20
SPEAKER_03: Who would you say is the sluttier um internet personality?
1:15:23
SPEAKER_01: Well, you probably I don't know.
1:15:26
SPEAKER_01: He's very private.
1:15:27
SPEAKER_03: And very private, which is like so annoying and weird.
1:15:29
SPEAKER_03: No, that's kind of you know, it's like, ooh, intrigue.
1:15:32
SPEAKER_02: Well, uh, any final cunty thoughts?
1:15:34
SPEAKER_02: This was fantastic and fun and cute and cool.
1:15:38
SPEAKER_01: I see your show and have you on our show.
1:15:41
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, you guys.
1:15:42
SPEAKER_03: I'm just so fucking thrilled to have been cunty.
1:15:45
SPEAKER_03: And my I I feel like my cunty thoughts, my final cunty thoughts are the cuntiest thing that we can do is be fucking sluts.
1:15:58
SPEAKER_03: And if we judge other people, we do it with a small group of friends off the internet.
1:16:03
SPEAKER_03: That is those are my final cunty thoughts.
1:16:05
SPEAKER_03: T mama.
1:16:06
SPEAKER_03: I think people should stop being so fucking mean to each other on the internet and be like normal person and gossip in a kitchen.
1:16:11
SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
1:16:12
SPEAKER_01: We were kind of having a similar conversation as well.
1:16:14
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:16:14
SPEAKER_03: Be a cunt in private like a normal person.
1:16:18
SPEAKER_01: 100% agree.
1:16:19
SPEAKER_01: Any final cunty thoughts, Gyna?
1:16:21
SPEAKER_01: Um, necklines are back.
1:16:24
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
1:16:25
SPEAKER_01: You heard it here.
1:16:26
SPEAKER_02: You heard it here.
1:16:27
SPEAKER_02: Uh, where can people find you, Eric?
1:16:30
SPEAKER_03: Follow me on Instagram at EricWills with a Z.
1:16:34
SPEAKER_03: And my podcast is at gay ass podcasts on YouTube and Instagram and Apple and Spotify and all the gay ass places.
1:16:42
SPEAKER_03: Love it.
1:16:42
SPEAKER_03: And IRL.
1:16:43
SPEAKER_01: Uh, what restaurant are you going to?
1:16:45
SPEAKER_01: This is live.
1:16:45
SPEAKER_01: And where are you getting your cookie skill at after this?
1:16:47
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:16:47
SPEAKER_01: Oh, you better get a cookie skill at.
1:16:49
SPEAKER_03: Any chance to get a cookie skillet, sweetie.
1:16:51
SPEAKER_03: It's on the bill.
1:16:52
SPEAKER_02: Don't forget to uh like the video, subscribe to the YouTube channel, follow on Instagram.
1:16:59
SPEAKER_02: If you're curious about stuff on Patreon, go get a little uh investigation.
1:17:03
SPEAKER_01: Become a patron so I can afford nails.
1:17:07
SPEAKER_01: Sorry.
1:17:08
SPEAKER_01: I'm so sorry you didn't get nails.
1:17:09
SPEAKER_01: Oh, no, they're there.
1:17:10
SPEAKER_01: There, there, there, there.
1:17:11
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's invisible.
1:17:13
SPEAKER_01: Wait, really quick.
1:17:13
SPEAKER_01: What?
1:17:14
SPEAKER_01: I did um kind of like in regards to you like wanting to post, but it will never happen, or accidentally.
1:17:19
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I sent um my insurance card with my dick in it.
1:17:23
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, yeah, I forgot about that.
1:17:25
SPEAKER_01: Tribeca apothecary?
1:17:26
SPEAKER_01: Why are you looking at apothecary?
1:17:27
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
1:17:28
SPEAKER_01: What do you say apothecary?
1:17:29
SPEAKER_01: Apothecary.
1:17:30
SPEAKER_01: Wait, how did that happen?
1:17:31
SPEAKER_01: I was doing it in the like bay where you like you don't go to your camera, you go to like the text option of taking a pick, and I was going quick because I was like, whatever.
1:17:39
SPEAKER_01: And I'm kind of a nudist a little bit, like at my house, and I just didn't realize it was popping in there.
1:17:44
SPEAKER_01: But I unscented the Virgoin we swooped in.
1:17:46
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, that's it.
1:17:47
SPEAKER_01: And I unscented.
1:17:49
SPEAKER_03: An insurance card photo with your dick is it's a great photo.
1:17:53
SPEAKER_03: Divine.
1:17:53
SPEAKER_03: All right.
1:17:54
SPEAKER_02: Well, on that note, love you.
1:17:55
SPEAKER_02: Love you.
1:17:56
SPEAKER_02: Thanks for coming.
1:17:57
SPEAKER_02: See you next Tuesday or next next Tuesday, depending on our upload schedule.
1:18:00
SPEAKER_02: But uh yeah, or number.
1:18:01
SPEAKER_02: Or yeah, this might be it.
1:18:03
SPEAKER_02: Finale.
1:18:04
SPEAKER_02: Bye.