Latest / Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler / Must Be a White Lady with Kevin Hart
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Hi, everybody, it's today. It's Tuesday. Actually it's election day,
- 0:04Speaker 1: so we are recording this episode on election day, and
- 0:06Speaker 1: we do not know the results of the election. So
- 0:09Speaker 1: here we are.
- 0:09Speaker 2: Are you watching the news? You're gonna wait till later.
- 0:11Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 0:12Speaker 1: I've had a very very busy morning, and I am
- 0:15Speaker 1: choosing to be as optimistic and positive until we have
- 0:19Speaker 1: something to not be optimistic and positive about. I woke
- 0:23Speaker 1: up this morning, I did a workout. I signed about
- 0:26Speaker 1: a thousand of my books sheets for my new book
- 0:29Speaker 1: that's coming out next year, and I signed a bunch
- 0:34Speaker 1: so that they can put there called tip sheets, so
- 0:35Speaker 1: that they put them in the book. And then we
- 0:38Speaker 1: had a huge contractor meeting with all these new contractors
- 0:41Speaker 1: that I had to hire to fix my house for
- 0:44Speaker 1: all the bad contracting does. So that was a big
- 0:47Speaker 1: I wasn't really part of that. I saw it from
- 0:48Speaker 1: the inside out, people circling the house. But there was
- 0:51Speaker 1: a lot of very responsible looking men here this morning,
- 0:55Speaker 1: and that made me feel very excited about the potential
- 0:58Speaker 1: of my house finally being done one day. And so
- 1:01Speaker 1: all of my team was here working with everyone, and
- 1:05Speaker 1: then I did something else. It feels like I've been
- 1:08Speaker 1: up for almost three days. I'm going to my friend
- 1:11Speaker 1: Connie's house to watch the election tonight. I do not
- 1:14Speaker 1: believe that we will have an answer about who won
- 1:16Speaker 1: the election tonight, but hopefully we'll get some a lots
- 1:19Speaker 1: of good news. And if you're listening to this on
- 1:21Speaker 1: Thursday and the election didn't go the way that we wanted,
- 1:26Speaker 1: I'll be back to discuss that next week.
- 1:28Speaker 2: I think that's a great way to put it. My
- 1:30Speaker 2: dad went in for surgery today. He said he doesn't
- 1:32Speaker 2: want to be present for the results. He wants to
- 1:34Speaker 2: be sedated, So he's having a heart surgery today.
- 1:37Speaker 1: That's good. Yeah, that's the right way. That's good. I
- 1:39Speaker 1: will also be sedated. I haven't chosen what drug is
- 1:42Speaker 1: going to do that yet. I have to go up
- 1:44Speaker 1: to my little drawer and figure out what kind of goodies.
- 1:46Speaker 1: I have so many goodies. I have so many new
- 1:49Speaker 1: goodies to try out. So I don't know what excellent
- 1:52Speaker 1: something that says love all over it. So maybe I'll
- 1:54Speaker 1: pop one of those suckers fantastic. I feel love. Also, people,
- 1:58Speaker 1: we need more of questions. We need people to write
- 2:00Speaker 1: in with their problems or asking for advice, and we're
- 2:05Speaker 1: doing minisodes this season which are like additional ten minute
- 2:08Speaker 1: episodes which we're trying to do with couples and couples counseling.
- 2:11Speaker 1: So if you have those issues with anybody that could
- 2:14Speaker 1: be a friend or a lover, or a coworker or
- 2:17Speaker 1: a family member, but also any of your questions from
- 2:21Speaker 1: the silly to the serious, we are accepting questions at
- 2:26Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com.
- 2:29Speaker 2: Yeah, so if you've been thinking about writing in for
- 2:31Speaker 2: a long time, this is your sign writ in.
- 2:33Speaker 1: It's your sign today our guest. First of all, I
- 2:36Speaker 1: was in Vegas this weekend. I saw A Dell on
- 2:38Speaker 1: Friday night, which was amazing, before my show at Caesar's
- 2:41Speaker 1: on Saturday night, which was amazing, Thank you so much.
- 2:44Speaker 1: It was so much fun. I loved how many people
- 2:47Speaker 1: came out. It was so so much fun. I had
- 2:50Speaker 1: it like forty eight hours of great times in Vegas.
- 2:53Speaker 1: And then Kevin Hart I ran into unfortunately at Adele
- 2:58Speaker 1: and he grew uped me. I groped him too, and
- 3:02Speaker 1: then we decided to go gambling. He was with Anico,
- 3:04Speaker 1: his wife. I was with my cousin Molly, and I
- 3:06Speaker 1: would just like to say that the amount of money
- 3:08Speaker 1: that Kevin lost during our gambling session in his private
- 3:12Speaker 1: gambling room that was attached to his hotel room is
- 3:14Speaker 1: too embarrassing to say on this podcast. You're an idiot anyway.
- 3:19Speaker 1: Our guest today stars in Peacock's Fight Out along with
- 3:23Speaker 1: every other movie that you'll ever seen in your life,
- 3:25Speaker 1: and you can catch him on his newest comedy tour,
- 3:28Speaker 1: acting my age, and he is definitely not acting his age.
- 3:31Speaker 1: Please welcome Kevin Hart. This is my friend, long longtime friends,
- 3:36Speaker 1: Kevin Hart. I'm very happy to see your face. I'm
- 3:38Speaker 1: always happy to see you. Actually, I always love to
- 3:40Speaker 1: see your face in the beginning, at first glance in
- 3:43Speaker 1: the beginning, like I see you coming and I think,
- 3:46Speaker 1: oh fun, this will be fun. Well then it's not
- 3:51Speaker 1: a dip, but I just there's I think there's an
- 3:53Speaker 1: anticipatory level of excitement when I get to see you.
- 3:57Speaker 4: Great word.
- 3:57Speaker 1: Yeah, well, you've used a couple words wrong in the
- 4:00Speaker 1: short time that you've been here, so I had to
- 4:02Speaker 1: correct his grammar as I do so hopefully you know
- 4:04Speaker 1: if you say anything wrong here.
- 4:06Speaker 4: Good news is I'm with the dictionary.
- 4:09Speaker 1: And you're only an hour late today, which for you
- 4:11Speaker 1: is early late.
- 4:13Speaker 5: I call you're not late when you give a heads
- 4:15Speaker 5: up to two and a half hours before.
- 4:18Speaker 1: When you say that's fine that you're late, I don't care, but.
- 4:22Speaker 4: I want to make it back.
- 4:23Speaker 1: You said I'm on my way at eleven o'clock and
- 4:26Speaker 1: we were supposed to be here at eleven fifteen.
- 4:28Speaker 5: Totally five in East Bubblefuck. I'm on the other side.
- 4:32Speaker 5: I'm in Calabasas well.
- 4:33Speaker 1: That's where the cheaper homes are. I guess, come over
- 4:35Speaker 1: the hill, right. I don't know why you live in Calabasas.
- 4:38Speaker 5: Because I don't want to backyard the size of my hand. Yeah,
- 4:41Speaker 5: how about that? Maybe that's why, Kevin.
- 4:44Speaker 1: What do you have to say for yourself?
- 4:46Speaker 4: What do I have to say for myself?
- 4:48Speaker 1: In general?
- 4:48Speaker 4: In general, I have to say I'm proud of me.
- 4:51Speaker 1: You are, Yeah, I'm proud of you too.
- 4:53Speaker 5: If I had to say something, I would say that,
- 4:55Speaker 5: I would. I would say, though we're we're in a
- 4:57Speaker 5: different time. I'm getting older, so now.
- 4:59Speaker 1: You like you're getting older? Absolutely, I feel like I'm
- 5:02Speaker 1: fucking crushing it and I'm forty nine.
- 5:04Speaker 4: Well, yeah, I'm getting older.
- 5:05Speaker 1: Doesn't mean but I mean it looks wise like body wise,
- 5:09Speaker 1: you know, like, well, I've always been curious about your
- 5:13Speaker 1: desire to work so much. I know you want to
- 5:16Speaker 1: Well no, I'll let you speak about why you want
- 5:18Speaker 1: to work as hard as you work.
- 5:20Speaker 5: I mean, look, half of it's fair, half of its commitment.
- 5:23Speaker 5: It's the idea of completion. So starting something you're not finishing,
- 5:27Speaker 5: and it doesn't sit well with me. So right now,
- 5:30Speaker 5: there's so much that I've started, right, not just in
- 5:33Speaker 5: entertainment or comedy or acting, you know, from a creative space.
- 5:38Speaker 5: Once you start building businesses and once you start developing
- 5:42Speaker 5: like an infrastructure full of minds and people to help
- 5:46Speaker 5: this thing last forever, it gets more difficult as you
- 5:49Speaker 5: go on. It's not easy building a business with businesses
- 5:53Speaker 5: in it. So completion, like, I feel like I have
- 5:56Speaker 5: to complete the task at hand.
- 5:58Speaker 4: And what that.
- 5:59Speaker 5: Looks like, it's still it's still to be determined, right
- 6:03Speaker 5: because it's constantly growing, it's expanding. So what once was
- 6:08Speaker 5: just the idea of a production company has turned into
- 6:10Speaker 5: an independent studio that's turned into a multi layered entity
- 6:15Speaker 5: with a VC attached with fun and development and opportunities
- 6:23Speaker 5: to merge and partner with like it's grows and grows
- 6:26Speaker 5: and grows, and you look up and you got a
- 6:27Speaker 5: staff of so many it's like, well, fuck, I can't
- 6:30Speaker 5: stop if I wanted to, because now I've invested all
- 6:33Speaker 5: this time and people have invested time into the thing
- 6:35Speaker 5: that I believe in, so now I owe them.
- 6:38Speaker 4: The return of energy. And it just keeps going.
- 6:40Speaker 5: But I think I do believe by time I'm fifty
- 6:45Speaker 5: to fifty three that a lot of these things should
- 6:48Speaker 5: have hard punctuations on them. And then I can kind
- 6:51Speaker 5: of sit back and go, wow, man, it's dope.
- 6:54Speaker 4: Did that happen?
- 6:54Speaker 1: And how old are you now?
- 6:55Speaker 4: Forty five? Now?
- 6:56Speaker 1: Okay, forty five? So tell me about how you hand
- 7:00Speaker 1: difficult situations in business, like when something doesn't go your way?
- 7:04Speaker 1: How do you how have you learned and grown to
- 7:07Speaker 1: deal with that kind of stuff?
- 7:08Speaker 5: That's the easiest thing to understand in business. The bulk
- 7:10Speaker 5: of things don't go your way at first. All ideas
- 7:13Speaker 5: are bad. Idea is to most. You got to prove
- 7:16Speaker 5: your case. And what you'll find for me is that
- 7:19Speaker 5: a resume without receipts is just it's just a piece
- 7:23Speaker 5: of paper, It's just words. Proof of concept is important.
- 7:26Speaker 5: So without a proof of concept, I'm always selling you
- 7:28Speaker 5: on an idea. What I've learned is that an idea
- 7:31Speaker 5: is something that comes a dimind dozen. Everybody has one.
- 7:34Speaker 5: But if my idea comes with a return, that's a
- 7:37Speaker 5: different thing. So how do I put myself in the
- 7:39Speaker 5: best position to make my partners understanding there's a mutual
- 7:42Speaker 5: alignment where if I win, you win, If you win,
- 7:45Speaker 5: I win.
- 7:46Speaker 1: And that's also a track record. Right with all of
- 7:48Speaker 1: this stuff you've done, people can trust your company, your brand,
- 7:51Speaker 1: your you know whatever you're calling yourself these days. Okay,
- 7:54Speaker 1: what are you calling yourself.
- 7:56Speaker 5: These you just said? I think you just you just
- 7:58Speaker 5: went through it. You're right, right, brand, you know, the
- 8:01Speaker 5: business man.
- 8:02Speaker 1: And then I'm very curious because I know how close
- 8:05Speaker 1: you are with your wife and your family. And this
- 8:08Speaker 1: may sound like a boring question, but I am very
- 8:10Speaker 1: curious as to how you managed to balance everything and
- 8:13Speaker 1: spend enough time with your family and your wife and
- 8:16Speaker 1: your kids.
- 8:16Speaker 5: It's a system. It's like a it's a routine system.
- 8:19Speaker 5: So if you've been doing it long enough, you'll find
- 8:22Speaker 5: that any routine is very easy to stay true to.
- 8:26Speaker 5: There's no different from waking up early in the morning
- 8:28Speaker 5: going to the gym than going to work. After the gym,
- 8:30Speaker 5: they're making it home for dinner, eat dinner with the kids, kids,
- 8:33Speaker 5: go to sleep, then you watch a movie, then you
- 8:35Speaker 5: go to sleep, you wake up masturbate.
- 8:37Speaker 4: Yeah, well yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, and I have time.
- 8:40Speaker 1: You probably are doing it.
- 8:42Speaker 4: I don't think I need to.
- 8:43Speaker 1: Okay, that's why it's weird that you're doing I get.
- 8:45Speaker 4: It, which is which is once again, I just don't
- 8:47Speaker 4: feel like I don't need.
- 8:48Speaker 1: To, right, you don't need to address it.
- 8:50Speaker 4: Fine, but I don't need to address I don't need
- 8:52Speaker 4: to do it. My wife, I'm hot, I think.
- 8:54Speaker 1: Yeah, well that's a separate conversation. I'm having her on
- 8:57Speaker 1: next week.
- 8:57Speaker 4: Well, I mean, if.
- 8:58Speaker 5: You want to talk to her finally, she's going to
- 9:00Speaker 5: do is tell you. I want to jump his bones
- 9:02Speaker 5: all the time, and I would too. I walked by me,
- 9:05Speaker 5: and I want to get a piece of that. No,
- 9:07Speaker 5: There's were times where I've looked at myself in like
- 9:09Speaker 5: a reflection, I'm like, I fuck, I get it.
- 9:13Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I don't know if you did.
- 9:14Speaker 1: You actually don't even have to look in the mirror,
- 9:16Speaker 1: because if you turn onto television. You can just watch
- 9:18Speaker 1: yourself at any sort of credit card commercial or airline
- 9:21Speaker 1: commercial or toe spacers commercial. It really doesn't matter what
- 9:24Speaker 1: you're promoting. Have you ever worn toe spacers?
- 9:27Speaker 4: Okay?
- 9:28Speaker 1: No, okay, well I just started wearing them the other day.
- 9:30Speaker 4: Well, I'm not gonna wear them, and I don't need what.
- 9:32Speaker 1: If your toes to stay apart?
- 9:35Speaker 4: No? I don't.
- 9:35Speaker 1: Why not? I didn't know what to get a bion?
- 9:38Speaker 4: Okay, then you get a bunion?
- 9:40Speaker 1: No, but you want to do you want to look
- 9:41Speaker 1: at a bunion?
- 9:42Speaker 5: I don't want to look at a bunion. And if
- 9:43Speaker 5: I had to, I don't care. I'm at an age
- 9:45Speaker 5: where you think I care about my feet.
- 9:47Speaker 1: I would hope. So what do you mean? Forty five?
- 9:51Speaker 1: You're not dead. You a whole lifetime ahead of you.
- 9:53Speaker 4: This is what it is.
- 9:54Speaker 1: This is mid century. You have another hopefully fifty forty
- 9:58Speaker 1: five fifty years and you to go around.
- 10:00Speaker 4: With by no desire to correct my feet? You know
- 10:03Speaker 4: you know what? I equate that too, like people that
- 10:06Speaker 4: are sixty that get bracest. It's too late.
- 10:08Speaker 1: I agree with this.
- 10:09Speaker 4: It's over. It's over. Why don't you wait until now?
- 10:17Speaker 5: Sixty years old, you're gonna fix it up. They be
- 10:19Speaker 5: done dealt with it through all this time. Leave it alone.
- 10:22Speaker 5: That's how I feel about my feet now. To answer
- 10:24Speaker 5: your question about my kids, my kids in my time,
- 10:27Speaker 5: it's a system. I'm dedicated to a home schedule, and
- 10:31Speaker 5: if I'm filming a movie, it changes.
- 10:33Speaker 4: But it's the reverse of touring.
- 10:35Speaker 5: Right. Like touring, you're going on the weekends, you're home
- 10:37Speaker 5: during the week. If I'm filming a movie, I'm going
- 10:39Speaker 5: during the week, but I'm home on the weekends. So
- 10:42Speaker 5: the kids understand that, and they have and they grow
- 10:46Speaker 5: up understanding what my job is. And when dad's home
- 10:50Speaker 5: it's great. And when he's going, we know what you're doing.
- 10:52Speaker 4: But we talk all the time.
- 10:54Speaker 5: My younger kids, I think are are going to get
- 10:56Speaker 5: a different, very different version because I'm down a little bit.
- 11:01Speaker 5: So well, yeah, I mean, I need to be home
- 11:05Speaker 5: more and I can, like I have the luxury of
- 11:07Speaker 5: working from the office at home, so I don't have
- 11:09Speaker 5: to be in the office as much or have to
- 11:12Speaker 5: be on the go as much. I think the bigger
- 11:16Speaker 5: things have gotten You're in a position where you can
- 11:18Speaker 5: delegate and have other people kind of execute things where you,
- 11:23Speaker 5: once upon a time had to do it yourself. I
- 11:24Speaker 5: don't have to do as much as that anymore. So
- 11:27Speaker 5: my younger kids definitely get a I think a bigger
- 11:30Speaker 5: dose of me than my olders did at this age.
- 11:33Speaker 5: But my older kids were so close like yah, now is.
- 11:37Speaker 1: They're getting the dose that they need. I would say
- 11:40Speaker 1: that that is the most important age. Your older kids
- 11:42Speaker 1: are at the age where they need you the most.
- 11:44Speaker 1: They need your influence the most absolutely.
- 11:47Speaker 4: You know.
- 11:47Speaker 5: What I like is that they're comfortable enough to talk
- 11:50Speaker 5: to me, good or bad.
- 11:51Speaker 4: There's no secrets. I mean, the probably are well within reason.
- 11:54Speaker 4: I noticed.
- 11:54Speaker 5: This is probably things that my kids don't tell me, and
- 11:57Speaker 5: like any kid, I get it right. But there's a
- 11:59Speaker 5: lot that they do come to the table with that
- 12:01Speaker 5: we talk about. And you know, I like the fact
- 12:04Speaker 5: that they are very confident that there is no bad
- 12:08Speaker 5: reaction from their father, Like it's dialogue all the time
- 12:12Speaker 5: and it's never met with a negative energy or an
- 12:15Speaker 5: angry tone.
- 12:16Speaker 4: And that, to me, that's what I'm most proud of
- 12:18Speaker 4: with them.
- 12:19Speaker 5: Like that, that's where I can see the benefit of
- 12:21Speaker 5: our relationship or the time that we're spending, Like I
- 12:24Speaker 5: can see it paying off in real time.
- 12:27Speaker 4: Yeah, because of the people that they were coming.
- 12:28Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's nice.
- 12:30Speaker 4: Yes, that's my that's my win.
- 12:32Speaker 1: What do you think about when you think about your
- 12:34Speaker 1: own childhood and you think about what your kids have,
- 12:36Speaker 1: what do you think about that?
- 12:38Speaker 5: It's crazy, man, because you know, you don't see this happening.
- 12:42Speaker 5: And the way I grew up, how I grew up,
- 12:46Speaker 5: I was a happy kid. I was a happy fucking
- 12:50Speaker 5: kid man, and with less. And the reason why I
- 12:54Speaker 5: was happy is because you just appreciated the things that
- 12:58Speaker 5: you had or that you were able to do. Going
- 13:00Speaker 5: outside was a big deal. Playing with my friends outside
- 13:04Speaker 5: was a big deal. Playing basketball in the schoolyard was
- 13:08Speaker 5: a big deal. Walking to the store to buy candy
- 13:11Speaker 5: was a big deal. Those were the big things. Like
- 13:14Speaker 5: we didn't need the grandioso version of trips and adventures,
- 13:19Speaker 5: like we had the steps. We had the walk from
- 13:23Speaker 5: where we lived to meet up at a friend's house,
- 13:26Speaker 5: to go to the playground, to go back from there
- 13:28Speaker 5: to a friend's house, sit outside, play a game that
- 13:31Speaker 5: we created, go back to the house, step repeat, Like
- 13:34Speaker 5: that's it. If you were lucky, you were in some
- 13:36Speaker 5: extracurricular activities. I swam, played basketball. My mom did the
- 13:40Speaker 5: best that she could.
- 13:41Speaker 1: Yeah, when you talk about that, that makes me nostalgic
- 13:43Speaker 1: from my own childhood actually, because there was an electricity
- 13:46Speaker 1: in the air, like even just going out in the
- 13:47Speaker 1: street after school and playing like red Rover, Red Rover
- 13:50Speaker 1: with the neighbors all on the street. It's like, where
- 13:53Speaker 1: does that happen anymore? Where did other neighborhoods in Minnesota
- 13:57Speaker 1: where that that happens? Yeah, not in Los Angeles.
- 14:00Speaker 5: I think the kids that are fortunate enough to grow
- 14:04Speaker 5: up in the neighborhoods, and by that I mean, like,
- 14:06Speaker 5: you know, where there's a nice connectivity within community. People
- 14:12Speaker 5: live in close proximity, and the kids grow up knowing
- 14:17Speaker 5: that friends across the street are down the street, and
- 14:20Speaker 5: as they get older, that rapport gets better. Now you know,
- 14:24Speaker 5: it's not my kid's fault, but respectfully, we don't we
- 14:27Speaker 5: don't have neighbors right, Like there's.
- 14:28Speaker 4: No walking to the house down the street.
- 14:32Speaker 5: Like we're living to hopefully get a high level of
- 14:36Speaker 5: privacy and exclusivity just in home because we don't want
- 14:41Speaker 5: to be bothered or we don't want to be approached
- 14:44Speaker 5: or it's me, it's not them. So because of that
- 14:46Speaker 5: life that we now live, they don't have that. So
- 14:50Speaker 5: it changes. But then the kids get old enough and
- 14:51Speaker 5: they're driving. So my kids are driving at the age sixteen,
- 14:55Speaker 5: and that I can go to my friend's house and
- 14:57Speaker 5: after that we're gonna go meet and do whatever. You
- 14:59Speaker 5: have a little bit more freedom, but the idea of
- 15:03Speaker 5: what you're doing is different from what I was doing. Right,
- 15:05Speaker 5: it's I don't my kids aren't hanging out after school.
- 15:08Speaker 5: They're not hanging out at the school and not breaking
- 15:11Speaker 5: the next to go to pet rowllies or the football games.
- 15:14Speaker 5: It's different now, and you know, electronics and social media,
- 15:18Speaker 5: it's changed all of that to where from afar people
- 15:21Speaker 5: feel close, but you don't have the same synergy.
- 15:24Speaker 1: Don't you think you're addicted to social media?
- 15:26Speaker 5: No? As and I could give two shits about it,
- 15:28Speaker 5: but at one point it was it was what drove
- 15:30Speaker 5: the machine. So I'm one of the early winners in
- 15:35Speaker 5: the space of social media about understanding the value of it.
- 15:38Speaker 4: Like anything else, is going to be getting bad.
- 15:41Speaker 5: I think that the bad is a little more present today,
- 15:45Speaker 5: but I also think that the good is watching this
- 15:48Speaker 5: younger generation crack the code and figure out like a
- 15:52Speaker 5: different side of economic payoff. They've cracked the code to
- 15:56Speaker 5: where the value in return and energy creative on social
- 16:01Speaker 5: media is making them millions of dollars live streaming, gaming, vlogging,
- 16:06Speaker 5: you name it.
- 16:07Speaker 4: They've cracked the code and made of the business.
- 16:10Speaker 5: So you're looking at a lot of people take care
- 16:12Speaker 5: of themselves and their families from doing the thing that
- 16:15Speaker 5: we thought was like real simple and just one note.
- 16:18Speaker 5: They've created a teer to it. So I think my
- 16:21Speaker 5: hat off to them, but I also understand, like I don't.
- 16:23Speaker 4: I don't do that. I don't have that much.
- 16:25Speaker 1: I don't have to do that. Well, you don't have
- 16:27Speaker 1: to do that. It's also yeah, okay, moving on from
- 16:30Speaker 1: that subject, because who cares. I want to ask you
- 16:33Speaker 1: what are you most proud of as a person, Not
- 16:36Speaker 1: of your accomplishments, but what is like a lesson that
- 16:39Speaker 1: you learned that you didn't have to learn more than
- 16:42Speaker 1: you know once or twice that you're proud of, like
- 16:45Speaker 1: understanding that lesson.
- 16:47Speaker 5: I think the biggest lesson I'll probably say is don't
- 16:50Speaker 5: expect others to give you what you give them, Right,
- 16:54Speaker 5: Like one of the biggest things that I'm now very
- 16:58Speaker 5: comfortable with understanding is my heart is different and the
- 17:03Speaker 5: energy attached to making others feel good or to put
- 17:07Speaker 5: others in a position to do good is a high
- 17:10Speaker 5: level energy. And just because you have that, it doesn't
- 17:14Speaker 5: mean that other people should. Everybody operates differently, right, and
- 17:17Speaker 5: everybody shows their love or shows their value or shows
- 17:21Speaker 5: their I guess you can say commitment differently. Yeah, so
- 17:26Speaker 5: I took the pressure off of others when I stop
- 17:31Speaker 5: expecting you to do what I do or to work
- 17:34Speaker 5: the same way that I wol Did that.
- 17:35Speaker 1: Happen when you met the Plastic cup boys.
- 17:38Speaker 5: I mean, me and my guys have definitely had our peaks,
- 17:40Speaker 5: hills and valleys. But I think they're all not only talented,
- 17:45Speaker 5: but they're all chasing different things for themselves. So you
- 17:50Speaker 5: go through this period where you want the most for everybody,
- 17:53Speaker 5: and if they're not doing what you think, then you
- 17:56Speaker 5: don't think that they're doing enough or are.
- 17:58Speaker 1: You go through a period where you want you feel
- 18:00Speaker 1: like you're helping so many people, and then when they
- 18:03Speaker 1: exceed beyond what you've provided for them, when they have
- 18:07Speaker 1: their own success beyond what you've given them. There can
- 18:10Speaker 1: be friction because you're like, wait, wait, wait, you're going out.
- 18:13Speaker 1: The whole idea is for everyone to fly by themselves,
- 18:15Speaker 1: but some people in leadership positions want to hold on
- 18:19Speaker 1: to everybody and say, don't exceed beyond the success that
- 18:22Speaker 1: I've given you.
- 18:23Speaker 4: You know that.
- 18:23Speaker 5: That's an interesting point because I don't. I don't suffer
- 18:26Speaker 5: from that. I'm very much a I want to see
- 18:29Speaker 5: everybody fly. I want to see I want to see
- 18:32Speaker 5: everybody get to the highest level of a win.
- 18:36Speaker 4: To me, that's special.
- 18:37Speaker 5: If you want to know the true definition of success,
- 18:39Speaker 5: the true definition of success is look at the success
- 18:41Speaker 5: of others around the successful person. Like that's if you
- 18:44Speaker 5: really want to get into it.
- 18:46Speaker 1: That's like when I put you on Chelsea Lately before
- 18:48Speaker 1: it when yeah, because nobody thought because of his height
- 18:53Speaker 1: and because of his body, he would ever be successful.
- 18:56Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, that's a cute little nugget, Like,
- 18:58Speaker 1: let's put him on Chelsea Lately. And you guess what
- 19:00Speaker 1: he did as a thank you. After three or four appearances,
- 19:04Speaker 1: he decided that he wanted to only be a guest
- 19:06Speaker 1: on Chelsea Lately, that he didn't want to be on
- 19:08Speaker 1: the panel anymore because he was becoming too famous. That's
- 19:11Speaker 1: what he said after I put him on the show,
- 19:12Speaker 1: and those his first television it was probably on The Jeffersons.
- 19:16Speaker 1: He played that little kid on The Jeffersons too, but
- 19:18Speaker 1: that was a long time.
- 19:19Speaker 5: But I think I think that that was the right move.
- 19:20Speaker 5: And just to kind of punctuate when I'm saying you
- 19:23Speaker 5: were trying to.
- 19:24Speaker 1: Hold you down, I think I said, good for him
- 19:27Speaker 1: for asking and the answers, Yes, that's what I said,
- 19:29Speaker 1: because I wanted to fly. I wanted you to fly
- 19:31Speaker 1: like a little lash.
- 19:32Speaker 4: You actually were very supportive of my progression in those days.
- 19:35Speaker 4: But also I think one thing that I that I'm really.
- 19:38Speaker 5: Good at is I don't forget You don't forget the
- 19:42Speaker 5: road of the journeys. So it's like those things that
- 19:45Speaker 5: helped elevate you, you don't turn your back on them.
- 19:48Speaker 5: When things start going well, you figure out great ways
- 19:51Speaker 5: for you to maintain those relationships and those platforms. Right, Like, like,
- 19:56Speaker 5: how how did I get to the place of like
- 19:59Speaker 5: crazy availability and awareness from a fan base was because
- 20:04Speaker 5: of all the things that I was able to do.
- 20:05Speaker 5: So that panel was very important. When the panel turned
- 20:09Speaker 5: into just being a guest. Very important. That audience attached
- 20:12Speaker 5: to Late Night with You was a very important audience.
- 20:16Speaker 5: Like those things transferring the ticket sales, so you don't
- 20:19Speaker 5: shut the door on it. You do that while doing
- 20:21Speaker 5: other things, and I think I did a good job
- 20:23Speaker 5: of maintaining all of that as things continue to grow,
- 20:27Speaker 5: and even today when you look back and we're able
- 20:30Speaker 5: to go and do a podcast. The dope thing about
- 20:32Speaker 5: these relationships is like when people go and look at
- 20:34Speaker 5: how long, over the course of time you've stayed true
- 20:37Speaker 5: to a friendship, or stay true to a great energy
- 20:41Speaker 5: and a great rapport.
- 20:42Speaker 4: It's a story. It's one long story.
- 20:44Speaker 5: Wow, they started here, they went here, and they've been
- 20:46Speaker 5: doing this all the way. Oh my god, it's so
- 20:48Speaker 5: dope that they still find a way to maintain a relationship.
- 20:52Speaker 5: It's so dope that we're able to connect those dots
- 20:55Speaker 5: with them. That to me is special and you don't
- 20:57Speaker 5: have many of those.
- 20:58Speaker 1: What you do, I mean, loyalty is a big thing
- 21:01Speaker 1: for you. You're very loyal and I love that about you.
- 21:03Speaker 1: I feel the same way about being loyal to people
- 21:05Speaker 1: and reciprocity. But like what you're saying is not hanging
- 21:08Speaker 1: your hat on reciprocity, like don't expect from others what
- 21:11Speaker 1: you give, which is also a good life lesson. And
- 21:15Speaker 1: another thing that I very much respect about you is
- 21:18Speaker 1: your vibration. You are operating at a high vibration. You
- 21:22Speaker 1: want to bring people in. You're a lover, You're always
- 21:25Speaker 1: you've always been this way. I've never seen you be
- 21:27Speaker 1: an asshole once. I mean you are an asshole, like
- 21:30Speaker 1: you are an asshole, like you're an asshole. Which, yeah,
- 21:34Speaker 1: I mean I already talked about that stuff, so I
- 21:35Speaker 1: don't need to expound.
- 21:36Speaker 4: All of that. I just don't think you need to
- 21:38Speaker 4: say that, right, I think.
- 21:39Speaker 1: You're an asshole. But and it's a good asshole and
- 21:41Speaker 1: it's a ridiculous asshole.
- 21:42Speaker 4: Well you know, a good assle.
- 21:47Speaker 1: But but loyalty is important to you, very right, absolutely,
- 21:51Speaker 1: So when you say what you just said, which is
- 21:54Speaker 1: don't expect other people to give you the love that
- 21:57Speaker 1: you're giving them necessarily, then how does loyal else play
- 22:00Speaker 1: into that?
- 22:01Speaker 5: Well, I don't think it's I don't think it's just love.
- 22:03Speaker 5: I think it's the energy. Right, Like if you just said,
- 22:06Speaker 5: if you're operating at this crazy vibration.
- 22:08Speaker 4: It's high vibration.
- 22:09Speaker 5: Like you just said, I can't expect everyone to meet
- 22:12Speaker 5: me here. I understand what's special about where I am,
- 22:17Speaker 5: and I understand how passionate I am about wanting so
- 22:20Speaker 5: much for so many. If you don't have the same
- 22:24Speaker 5: wants for yourself, I can't get mad at you. I
- 22:28Speaker 5: can't take that as like disrespector or I can't get frustrated.
- 22:33Speaker 5: I have to then say it's dope, and I understand,
- 22:36Speaker 5: like what you want for you is for you. I
- 22:39Speaker 5: want to just do what I can to help you,
- 22:40Speaker 5: and then I hope you get whatever it is that
- 22:43Speaker 5: you want. It's much easier when you can process it
- 22:47Speaker 5: differently and look at it with a dual POV. Then
- 22:49Speaker 5: look at it from one perspective, which used to be
- 22:52Speaker 5: for me I used to suffer from. Well, if you
- 22:54Speaker 5: don't want what I want to you don't want the
- 22:55Speaker 5: best for yourself, Like that's correct, you don't want obviously
- 23:00Speaker 5: not trying to be the best, and everybody's not trying
- 23:02Speaker 5: to do that.
- 23:03Speaker 4: Everybody's not trying to be the best.
- 23:06Speaker 5: And some people want to be enough, or some people
- 23:09Speaker 5: want a little bit or a little taste, and some
- 23:11Speaker 5: people want to be content.
- 23:12Speaker 4: There's different levels for a reason. And to.
- 23:17Speaker 5: My fault, a younger version of myself, it was like, Man,
- 23:22Speaker 5: if you're not on this page and you just don't
- 23:24Speaker 5: see what I see, then I just can't have that
- 23:27Speaker 5: or around because your energy is taken away from my energy.
- 23:30Speaker 4: And that it's not the case all the time. You
- 23:32Speaker 4: should be able to separate it.
- 23:33Speaker 5: You should be able to understand it, and you should
- 23:34Speaker 5: also be able to let people figure things out on
- 23:36Speaker 5: their own time. And sometimes when they do, it's a
- 23:39Speaker 5: great it's a great full circle moment. If they don't,
- 23:42Speaker 5: it doesn't matter, It doesn't affect you to the point
- 23:44Speaker 5: of no return. But I used to operate as if
- 23:47Speaker 5: it did at one point. That's the biggest lesson that
- 23:50Speaker 5: I think I had. And when I got out of
- 23:51Speaker 5: my way and I started letting other people flourish and
- 23:54Speaker 5: be great and stop trying to control and navigate every
- 23:57Speaker 5: single thing, I started to see things grow.
- 24:00Speaker 1: Okay, on that note, we're gonna take a break and
- 24:01Speaker 1: we're gonna be right back with Kevin Hart. Okay, and
- 24:08Speaker 1: we're back with Kevin Hart. Can you put your pants
- 24:10Speaker 1: back on?
- 24:11Speaker 4: What do you mean?
- 24:12Speaker 1: Oh? Nothing, This is. This isn't a visual podcast, So
- 24:16Speaker 1: I still need you to put your pants back on pants.
- 24:19Speaker 2: I will also have you put on your headphones right
- 24:21Speaker 2: now because we're gonna start.
- 24:22Speaker 1: Put over your pants. Actually, we have callers, and you're
- 24:24Speaker 1: gonna give advice to real people. They call in for advice.
- 24:27Speaker 1: It's called dear Chelsea. How is that how you wear?
- 24:32Speaker 4: These people are asking you for advice? Do they have
- 24:37Speaker 4: they seen you?
- 24:38Speaker 1: Is that how you wear? Headphones?
- 24:40Speaker 5: Like this?
- 24:40Speaker 1: Who are you beats?
- 24:41Speaker 6: Well?
- 24:41Speaker 4: You don't?
- 24:43Speaker 1: Why not?
- 24:44Speaker 4: Because you don't need to hear in one.
- 24:46Speaker 1: A this and it's not an air it's an early.
- 24:49Speaker 4: One of those people that wear pods.
- 24:52Speaker 1: The point of having a because I want to still
- 24:54Speaker 1: hear you. Clear, you're gonna hear me in the fucking
- 24:57Speaker 1: microphone miracle.
- 24:58Speaker 5: I can hear you just like this though. Yeah, see that.
- 25:01Speaker 5: See this is you know what that's called these crazy gaslighting?
- 25:05Speaker 4: No, this is crazy. This is what the millennials are
- 25:07Speaker 4: talking about.
- 25:08Speaker 1: Are you talking about me? I'm a millennium. Are you
- 25:10Speaker 1: talking about me?
- 25:10Speaker 5: No?
- 25:10Speaker 4: I'm saying that you're what they talk about.
- 25:12Speaker 1: Millennials are talking about us. They're talking about I think
- 25:16Speaker 1: that I'm talking about me only Yeah, women like me
- 25:19Speaker 1: who go like this, if you did that, she gets it.
- 25:22Speaker 4: No, that's stupid.
- 25:25Speaker 1: First of all, it fucking hurts my ear rings and
- 25:26Speaker 1: it hurts my ears.
- 25:27Speaker 4: Well, then has more reason for you to have one off.
- 25:31Speaker 1: No, it hurts my ears to have it off.
- 25:33Speaker 4: Why would it hurt your ears to have it off
- 25:35Speaker 4: of your ear?
- 25:36Speaker 1: Because then my ears are way bigger than your ears.
- 25:39Speaker 1: They always have been. It's catching my ear. Look at
- 25:43Speaker 1: how big my ears are.
- 25:44Speaker 5: Wow?
- 25:46Speaker 1: Have you ever they keep growings? Are like little two oreos.
- 25:50Speaker 4: My Jesus, my.
- 25:52Speaker 1: Ears actually are like my very embarrassing feature. They look
- 25:56Speaker 1: like a laby. The bottom part is like laby. It's
- 25:58Speaker 1: like flappy, I don't know, bigger than my vagina, like
- 26:02Speaker 1: a whole person. I can here, Jesus, what do we
- 26:06Speaker 1: have today, Catherine?
- 26:08Speaker 2: Oh, we have some very juicy questionss for you, Kevin.
- 26:11Speaker 2: Our first question comes from Kelly, and she has a
- 26:15Speaker 2: question about her best friend.
- 26:16Speaker 1: Try and be serious. Okay, okay, this could be serious
- 26:19Speaker 1: or it could not be. I don't know yet.
- 26:21Speaker 2: There's a mix.
- 26:22Speaker 4: This isn't rocket fucking science. This shut up answer the questions.
- 26:25Speaker 1: I kid it, Dear, Chelsea.
- 26:28Speaker 2: My best friend and I have been friends for over
- 26:30Speaker 2: twenty years now, but lately she's been getting on my nerves.
- 26:33Speaker 1: Welcome to the club.
- 26:34Speaker 2: Every time we go out to do anything, she is
- 26:36Speaker 2: overtly sexual with any mail around. She got divorced a
- 26:40Speaker 2: couple of years ago, so this is her first time
- 26:42Speaker 2: being truly single. She's joined every single dating app, and
- 26:45Speaker 2: I'm glad she's getting out there. But what I'm not
- 26:47Speaker 2: so cool about is her acting like a cat and
- 26:49Speaker 2: heat every time we're out in public. A few months ago,
- 26:52Speaker 2: we were at her daughter's twenty first birthday where she
- 26:55Speaker 2: was hitting on her daughter's friends to the point of
- 26:57Speaker 2: adjusting her shirt so her cleavage was fully on dis play.
- 27:01Speaker 2: Her daughter was mortified. I did address that her daughter
- 27:03Speaker 2: looked embarrassed by her behavior, and she just laughed it off.
- 27:06Speaker 2: So I don't know how to approach this or if
- 27:08Speaker 2: I even should. Last weekend, she hit on my married
- 27:11Speaker 2: friend before even taking the time to ask if he
- 27:13Speaker 2: was married. I'm heading out right now with my friends
- 27:16Speaker 2: and did not invite her, but I know this is
- 27:18Speaker 2: going to be a topic of conversation and I feel
- 27:20Speaker 2: the need to defend her. Am I being a prude
- 27:22Speaker 2: or is this just a phase I should wait out?
- 27:24Speaker 1: Kelly, Hi, Kelly, Hey, Kelly. Hi, guys, Hi, this is
- 27:28Speaker 1: Kevin Hart. Do you recognize him? He's our special guest. Yeah. Yeah, Okay,
- 27:33Speaker 1: you want me to go for sure? Okay? Yeah?
- 27:35Speaker 4: I think I have a pretty good wrap on this.
- 27:37Speaker 5: Okay, First of all, you know, I think you have
- 27:40Speaker 5: to have a little bit of understanding to the fact
- 27:43Speaker 5: that she's divorced in life after divorce.
- 27:47Speaker 4: If you haven't been divorced, you don't know what that's like.
- 27:49Speaker 5: So companionship is something that people want, something that people
- 27:52Speaker 5: long for and fiend for.
- 27:54Speaker 4: It sounds to me like there's just a want in.
- 27:57Speaker 5: Need for companionship, and that can opinionship right now is
- 28:01Speaker 5: being filled with flirtation or fun any environments that you're
- 28:05Speaker 5: going to. So if you were looking for a real
- 28:08Speaker 5: change and it was annoying you at a high level,
- 28:11Speaker 5: I think that you should just change the environments that
- 28:14Speaker 5: you attend with this particular friend. In other words, if
- 28:17Speaker 5: you don't want to be a part of the flirtatious
- 28:20Speaker 5: or salacious things or ways, I think you change it
- 28:23Speaker 5: to just lunch or an early dinner and there's not
- 28:28Speaker 5: the crazy party environment or the world where you can
- 28:31Speaker 5: approach or be approached, and I think for you, you'll then
- 28:34Speaker 5: have a better understanding of what that relationship is, and
- 28:39Speaker 5: then you can separate yourself and she can go do
- 28:41Speaker 5: her thing when she wants to, and you don't have
- 28:43Speaker 5: to be annoyed and come off as a friend that's
- 28:46Speaker 5: prudish or just not fun within the world of fun
- 28:50Speaker 5: that she's looking for.
- 28:51Speaker 1: How long has she been divorced.
- 28:53Speaker 3: She's been divorced about three years.
- 28:55Speaker 1: Okay, so she's not newly divorced, not newly divorced, she's
- 28:58Speaker 1: just getting out of the newly divorced area.
- 29:01Speaker 3: Right, I'm getting out of it. Yeah, and she's been
- 29:03Speaker 3: in two long term relationships since then.
- 29:06Speaker 1: And so is this flirtation like horniness level? Has it spiked?
- 29:09Speaker 1: Is that what you're noticing.
- 29:11Speaker 3: I've Yeah, I've definitely noticed in the past probably three months,
- 29:15Speaker 3: that it's really really spice. She just gets overly, like
- 29:17Speaker 3: touchy and feely with people that she really doesn't know,
- 29:20Speaker 3: she doesn't really know their situation.
- 29:22Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 29:22Speaker 3: No, she's making people around her uncomfortable. Some of my
- 29:25Speaker 3: friends have said, I'm a little uncomfortable with her around
- 29:28Speaker 3: my husband because she didn't even know that he was
- 29:30Speaker 3: married to me. She was just in this big friend
- 29:31Speaker 3: group and was like petting him. I was like, oh, yeah,
- 29:34Speaker 3: I can see that.
- 29:35Speaker 1: Well. I think Kevin's advice is great and sound, but
- 29:38Speaker 1: I think so too if the problem continues, because like
- 29:41Speaker 1: it could really be like a hormonal female thing, you
- 29:43Speaker 1: know what I mean, Because all of a sudden, someone
- 29:45Speaker 1: going around and like, you know, kind of semi groping
- 29:48Speaker 1: people is a problem, and it will become a problem,
- 29:50Speaker 1: especially since people are fucking married and they don't like that.
- 29:53Speaker 1: But if you want to have an honest conversation with her,
- 29:56Speaker 1: I would, as a woman, appreciate a woman having an
- 29:58Speaker 1: honest conversation with me saying like, hey, your behavior which
- 30:01Speaker 1: has happened in the past, your behavior was inappropriate or
- 30:04Speaker 1: you're you know, like, hey, you made someone feel uncomfortable.
- 30:07Speaker 1: You don't want to shame her and say everyone's talking
- 30:10Speaker 1: about you, but you want to do you do want to
- 30:12Speaker 1: be honest, as if out of a friendship you kind
- 30:15Speaker 1: of owe each other honesty to say, hey, that guy's
- 30:17Speaker 1: married and his wife was there and he was uncomfortable
- 30:19Speaker 1: and she was uncomfortable and cite one example instead of ten.
- 30:23Speaker 1: You know, when you do want to have a conversation,
- 30:25Speaker 1: if it gets to the point where you think you
- 30:27Speaker 1: have to have the conversation, if you in the business
- 30:30Speaker 1: of defending her, I think you could just say, she's
- 30:33Speaker 1: just going through something right now, I'm going to be
- 30:34Speaker 1: her friend and you know, hopefully this is just a phase.
- 30:37Speaker 5: Is that really going through something that some people were
- 30:39Speaker 5: just a little faster with life?
- 30:41Speaker 1: No? No, because she said this isn't typical of her behavior, right.
- 30:45Speaker 4: She said in the last three or four months.
- 30:46Speaker 5: So maybe like she's in a fucking mindset like you
- 30:49Speaker 5: know what, I've I haven't let go and just completely
- 30:53Speaker 5: let loose, and you know what, at this time, I
- 30:56Speaker 5: just want to fucking do what I want when I
- 30:58Speaker 5: want in return. Granted, yes, rubbing some people the wrong way,
- 31:02Speaker 5: flirting with husbands when you don't know that they're married, okay, yes,
- 31:06Speaker 5: but it's not like she's going and said, oh, this
- 31:09Speaker 5: is my husband. Then she's still doing the shit she
- 31:11Speaker 5: didn't know. I'm saying, if she's in a mindset of
- 31:14Speaker 5: I'm going to live and operate differently for me, I
- 31:17Speaker 5: think you should just be open and discussion, like, hey,
- 31:19Speaker 5: just tell me where you at, where you are mentally, like,
- 31:21Speaker 5: are you on like a more free life living journey
- 31:26Speaker 5: right now? Because it's appearing like you know, you just
- 31:29Speaker 5: you look like a fucking can and heat right now,
- 31:31Speaker 5: like every guy you flirting with look like you want
- 31:33Speaker 5: to fuck everybody. If that's the case, let table it
- 31:36Speaker 5: so I know where you are and I can let
- 31:38Speaker 5: you operate when and where you want to do that.
- 31:40Speaker 5: But you can't do that in all the settings. It's
- 31:43Speaker 5: coming off crazy, But let me know because me and
- 31:45Speaker 5: you are close enough, so I'm on the table. I'm
- 31:48Speaker 5: on a table of understanding.
- 31:49Speaker 1: That's actually really good advice, Chris. I wasn't expecting that
- 31:52Speaker 1: from you.
- 31:52Speaker 5: You don't expect me to be a sound not nostalgic board,
- 31:56Speaker 5: no common sense, it's.
- 31:58Speaker 1: Not common sense. It's a little bit more new on
- 32:00Speaker 1: than common sense. And I wouldn't expect.
- 32:01Speaker 5: Everybody wants to everybody wants to attack the person with
- 32:05Speaker 5: like whole like activities.
- 32:07Speaker 1: I understand saying that. I'm just saying when you make
- 32:10Speaker 1: someone feel uncomfortable, I want to know if I made
- 32:12Speaker 1: someone feel uncomfortable, if I was at a party and
- 32:15Speaker 1: was like hitting on ancone made Yeah, well that was intentional.
- 32:19Speaker 1: This is not intentional, I don't think.
- 32:21Speaker 2: Well, and I'm sure there's like room for levity in
- 32:23Speaker 2: that conversation about like girl, you got a.
- 32:24Speaker 1: Tone of yeah, yeah, exactly. It doesn't have to be
- 32:27Speaker 1: so serious.
- 32:28Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, I definitely want to come at it
- 32:30Speaker 3: from a place of love and understanding because I know
- 32:33Speaker 3: everything she's been through on her human diary. She's mine, Yeah,
- 32:37Speaker 3: I get that, But I really love that approach.
- 32:39Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's too pronged approach where you talk, but
- 32:42Speaker 2: also maybe she's a brunch friend for a while.
- 32:44Speaker 1: What is a too pronged approach called? What is that?
- 32:46Speaker 1: Remember what we used to call it?
- 32:47Speaker 4: To talk about approach? I think that's what you would
- 32:51Speaker 4: call it.
- 32:51Speaker 5: I think I think a too pronged approach is Actually
- 32:53Speaker 5: I was thinking of the shaker.
- 32:55Speaker 1: That's what I remember, the shocker. I think that's sorry related.
- 32:58Speaker 1: I don't know, it might be directly related to her.
- 33:00Speaker 1: Maybe that's exactly what she's looking for, the shocker.
- 33:03Speaker 2: Give her the shocker and send her on her way.
- 33:05Speaker 1: Anyway, I think that those all sound like good options.
- 33:08Speaker 1: Do you?
- 33:09Speaker 3: Absolutely? Thank you guys so much. I really appreciate it.
- 33:12Speaker 1: Okay, thank you, thank you bye. That was good, Kevin
- 33:17Speaker 1: h for you.
- 33:18Speaker 4: Yeah for me, that was impressed by that.
- 33:20Speaker 5: Why can't you just like give you there?
- 33:24Speaker 4: Because you do it?
- 33:25Speaker 5: And then there's this weird change. It happens right after.
- 33:29Speaker 5: It's like the car just goes to the left. It's
- 33:31Speaker 5: like we're on a great road.
- 33:33Speaker 1: Do you want to make you want to make card
- 33:34Speaker 1: jokes right now? I don't think so.
- 33:36Speaker 2: So all right, well, our next question comes from Jennifer,
- 33:40Speaker 2: and this one is just an email, so she won't
- 33:42Speaker 2: be joining us, but the subject line is hot tub fury.
- 33:46Speaker 2: Dear Chelsea, don't you.
- 33:47Speaker 1: Have a show about hot tubs or cold cold?
- 33:51Speaker 3: Oh?
- 33:51Speaker 2: You do the whole plunges and all that stuff.
- 33:53Speaker 1: He does a bit like that, yeah too.
- 33:54Speaker 4: Yeah, one day she will support me.
- 33:57Speaker 1: I believe I have supported you on several occasions. I
- 34:00Speaker 1: think I worked out with your fucking trainer too on
- 34:02Speaker 1: a show. What was that show?
- 34:04Speaker 4: Was that?
- 34:04Speaker 1: The Cold plun Show?
- 34:10Speaker 2: Jennifer says, Dear Chelsea, I have an absolutely fed up
- 34:13Speaker 2: situation I'm dealing with. I've been married to my husband
- 34:16Speaker 2: for fourteen years, together for twenty we own a business
- 34:19Speaker 2: and a home together. On to the hot tub fury.
- 34:22Speaker 2: There's a woman who circles our friend group, let's call
- 34:25Speaker 2: her Abby. On New Year's Eve twenty twenty, she got
- 34:28Speaker 2: naked in my hot tub at a party, and I
- 34:30Speaker 2: told her flat out that I was uncomfortable with her
- 34:32Speaker 2: being naked in the hot tub with.
- 34:36Speaker 1: This girl gets around.
- 34:38Speaker 2: I told my husband the same thing. I have zero
- 34:41Speaker 2: problems with him having single female friends, and he has
- 34:44Speaker 2: a lot that he sees for drinks or shows that
- 34:46Speaker 2: I don't wish to attend or don't care about. In
- 34:48Speaker 2: twenty twenty two, when I went on a cruise, I
- 34:51Speaker 2: later learned that Abby had been at my home when
- 34:53Speaker 2: I was not there. Then this past New Year's Eve,
- 34:56Speaker 2: she got naked in the hot tub again in front
- 34:58Speaker 2: of me. I confronted her and asked her to leave.
- 35:01Speaker 2: I was away this past Friday night, and around eleven
- 35:03Speaker 2: pm I got a text from a neighbor telling me
- 35:05Speaker 2: the dogs were barking. I checked the cameras. I see
- 35:09Speaker 2: him standing naked behind our bar with two cocktails in
- 35:12Speaker 2: front of him. So I switch views and see Abby
- 35:15Speaker 2: naked in our hot tub. I didn't say anything to him.
- 35:18Speaker 2: I couldn't decide my next move, so I waited. When
- 35:21Speaker 2: I got home, I realized that I wasn't eating or sleeping,
- 35:24Speaker 2: so I decided to confront him. I have since found
- 35:26Speaker 2: out that Abby is at my house whenever I go
- 35:29Speaker 2: out of town. I have also gone through all the
- 35:32Speaker 2: camera footage and found that nothing beyond the naked hot
- 35:35Speaker 2: tubbing and some bizarres sitting in the bar naked, has happened.
- 35:38Speaker 2: They never touched each other, not even a hug when
- 35:41Speaker 2: she was leaving. It's so bizarre to me. I'm uncertain
- 35:44Speaker 2: if this is cheating or severe boundary stepping. I don't
- 35:46Speaker 2: feel like I can leave and start a new life
- 35:48Speaker 2: and career at forty six.
- 35:50Speaker 1: Help Jennifer, Well, she really needs to be a caller,
- 35:53Speaker 1: I know, because hey, there's so many questions. Do they
- 35:56Speaker 1: have cameras? They don't have camera. The husband knows about
- 35:59Speaker 1: the camera, right, so of course he's not going to
- 36:01Speaker 1: be doing anything on camera. So perhaps they're not doing
- 36:05Speaker 1: anything in front of her, and then they go inside
- 36:07Speaker 1: and do something. I mean, that's one theory. Like, he's
- 36:11Speaker 1: not an idiot, it's his house, so why would he
- 36:13Speaker 1: be fucking somebody on camera that seems really stupid. Kevin,
- 36:18Speaker 1: what is your what do you have to say about this?
- 36:21Speaker 4: I mean, this is this is just stupid.
- 36:23Speaker 5: I mean like literally this is This is one of
- 36:25Speaker 5: the ones where you what are you asking? What help
- 36:28Speaker 5: is she looking for? Like if you're okay with your
- 36:31Speaker 5: husband having female friends, and you have been for the
- 36:34Speaker 5: duration of your marriage and your relationship, and you choose
- 36:37Speaker 5: to not be around those environments, so that means you
- 36:41Speaker 5: support whatever the world of fun is and you're his
- 36:44Speaker 5: level of comfort has progressed and grown over the years.
- 36:47Speaker 5: And if the female friends come over your house when
- 36:50Speaker 5: you're not there and you're aware or not aware, you
- 36:53Speaker 5: said boundaries or linestepping, like, well, it appears that you've
- 36:57Speaker 5: already set some type of boundary that this is okay.
- 37:00Speaker 5: I don't know what husband in his right mind is
- 37:02Speaker 5: having female company over as if a wife can't find
- 37:07Speaker 5: out when there's cameras and camera footage and you checking
- 37:10Speaker 5: the cameras and then seeing her at your house numerous
- 37:15Speaker 5: amount of times, like and then her getting naked in
- 37:18Speaker 5: front of you when you're there, obviously like she doesn't
- 37:21Speaker 5: feel like she's don't get anything wrong, Like so somewhere
- 37:25Speaker 5: along the line.
- 37:27Speaker 4: Somebody's not being very clear with what's happening.
- 37:30Speaker 1: Also, you did say she asked this woman to leave,
- 37:34Speaker 1: and because she was naked, your husband understands. That's also
- 37:38Speaker 1: setting a boundary saying you don't want to be around that.
- 37:40Speaker 1: And then the husband's she's there all the time when
- 37:43Speaker 1: you're gone, that's fishy.
- 37:44Speaker 4: But she got naked again, like the first time.
- 37:46Speaker 2: She said the New Year's part.
- 37:50Speaker 1: I don't trust your but I also don't trust the husband.
- 37:53Speaker 5: I think the husband is fine. He's not doing the
- 37:56Speaker 5: husband ain't doing nothing wrong. He's like, look at the cameras.
- 38:00Speaker 5: Go look at the cameras. I ain't touched this woman.
- 38:02Speaker 5: I ain't a goddamn thing with this woman. Yeah, it
- 38:04Speaker 5: was naked. So what we send at the bar having
- 38:06Speaker 5: a drink. The hot tub got hot, we got out,
- 38:08Speaker 5: we sat at the bar. You see it right there,
- 38:10Speaker 5: like he's.
- 38:11Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's his defense. You don't think I know
- 38:13Speaker 1: there's cameras, obviously, I know you can look at this
- 38:16Speaker 1: not feeling anything wrong. I find that behavior very suspicious.
- 38:19Speaker 1: I don't think two people are hanging around naked because
- 38:22Speaker 1: they're nudists. I don't think that I don't think that's
- 38:25Speaker 1: a thing. I think there's probably something more to the
- 38:27Speaker 1: story that you're not willing to face. And if you
- 38:30Speaker 1: don't want to face it, then I would say, turn
- 38:33Speaker 1: off the cameras and look away.
- 38:34Speaker 5: I tell you another big thing, the whole idea of
- 38:38Speaker 5: strangers over your house, like, I've never been a company
- 38:42Speaker 5: at my house. Guy her saying, oh yeah, well she's there,
- 38:47Speaker 5: and other people were there at the house, Like this
- 38:49Speaker 5: is why you don't invite people to your home. Weird
- 38:52Speaker 5: shit happens when weird people get free and get comfortable.
- 38:55Speaker 5: Somebody feeling that comfortable that they can get naked at
- 38:59Speaker 5: your a home where you lay your head and your husband,
- 39:02Speaker 5: that's a problem within itself. And if it's happening a
- 39:05Speaker 5: number of times, clearly, somewhere along the lines, when it
- 39:09Speaker 5: happened the first time, somebody was like, hey, go girl,
- 39:13Speaker 5: somebody is supporting it, Like, you don't double back and
- 39:15Speaker 5: do the naked thing again.
- 39:17Speaker 4: If it was met with aggression or resistance the first.
- 39:20Speaker 5: Time, exactly, something somewhere there's some information being left out.
- 39:24Speaker 1: She exactly, you told her not to be naked in
- 39:27Speaker 1: your house, You asked her to leave, and the minute
- 39:29Speaker 1: you were gone, she went back and did the same
- 39:30Speaker 1: thing you asked her not to do. So she has
- 39:33Speaker 1: no boundary with you because somebody else has let her
- 39:35Speaker 1: know that she doesn't have to have a boundary. And
- 39:37Speaker 1: that's somebody is your fucking husband. So you have a
- 39:40Speaker 1: problem with your husband. I believe something more is going
- 39:43Speaker 1: on between those two. You're forty six years old. That
- 39:46Speaker 1: is not the end of the world. Please don't ever
- 39:48Speaker 1: say what am I going to do as a forty
- 39:49Speaker 1: six year old woman? Plenty of shit. You could change
- 39:52Speaker 1: the channel anytime you want in this life, right And
- 39:55Speaker 1: apparently they say if you make it through the next
- 39:56Speaker 1: ten years, we can live till War one hundred and twenty,
- 39:59Speaker 1: so you might have a whole life ahead of you.
- 40:01Speaker 1: I don't know if I mean, I've already spoken about
- 40:03Speaker 1: how I don't want to live that long. I can't
- 40:05Speaker 1: afford to live that long. It was, it'll be exhausting.
- 40:07Speaker 1: What am I going to be doing stand up when
- 40:08Speaker 1: I'm one hundred and nine, like I hope not. I
- 40:10Speaker 1: don't you know that nobody wants to see that. I
- 40:13Speaker 1: mean talk about vaginal dryness, you know, So, I mean, honestly,
- 40:19Speaker 1: one hundred and nine years old. My god, I will
- 40:22Speaker 1: figure out a way to get a wet pussy at one.
- 40:23Speaker 4: Hundred and nine.
- 40:25Speaker 1: Anyway, we got a little off track. But you know
- 40:27Speaker 1: who's pussy isn't dry? The woman he's sitting in your
- 40:30Speaker 1: chacuzzi naked.
- 40:32Speaker 5: That's an aggressive that's a very aggress it's an aggressive move.
- 40:36Speaker 2: So do we send her a couple's counseling? The marriage a.
- 40:41Speaker 4: Couple of counseling. I have a direct conversation with your husband.
- 40:43Speaker 4: This is not a very hard problem to solve.
- 40:45Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very easy, all right. And if he won't
- 40:48Speaker 2: stop seeing abby when.
- 40:49Speaker 1: Well, then that's a big red flag too. This is
- 40:51Speaker 1: all very odd. There's no counselor that you're going to
- 40:54Speaker 1: go to. I mean it's good actually to go to
- 40:55Speaker 1: a counsel with him. So so you have someone tell
- 40:58Speaker 1: him a count of party. This is not normal behavior.
- 41:02Speaker 1: You don't have naked opposite sex people at your house
- 41:04Speaker 1: when your wife is out of town. That leads to
- 41:07Speaker 1: one thing. I mean, where are they going when they're
- 41:09Speaker 1: drinks at the bar? Right?
- 41:11Speaker 4: Yeah?
- 41:13Speaker 2: All right, Jennifer, Well keep us posted.
- 41:15Speaker 5: Well.
- 41:15Speaker 2: Our next caller is Savannah. Her subject line is my
- 41:19Speaker 2: stepmom thinks I'm doing porn. Oh, dear Chelsea.
- 41:23Speaker 1: Oh, that's perfect. Kevin just launched his only Fans Paid.
- 41:26Speaker 1: That's perfect. It is actually on it right.
- 41:28Speaker 2: Now, Dear Chelsea. My stepmom has been in my life
- 41:30Speaker 2: since I was ten and I'm now thirty one. We've
- 41:33Speaker 2: had a pretty good relationship for most of my life,
- 41:35Speaker 2: but for a year now we haven't spoken. I got
- 41:38Speaker 2: out of rehab last year, and at first she and
- 41:41Speaker 2: my whole family were nothing but supportive and proud. When
- 41:44Speaker 2: I got out of rehab. I had moved back to
- 41:46Speaker 2: my apartment after treatment and was enjoying some time before
- 41:49Speaker 2: re entering the workforce, especially since I was still in
- 41:51Speaker 2: treatment three times a week. I began to get questions
- 41:54Speaker 2: about how I could afford being unemployed. Then my dad
- 41:58Speaker 2: called me, who I have the closest and most love
- 42:00Speaker 2: relationship with, and asked me if I was selling my
- 42:02Speaker 2: body on the internet or doing that quote only funds thing.
- 42:06Speaker 2: I was aghast. I have no judgment, nor do I
- 42:09Speaker 2: condemn that line of work, but it's just simply not
- 42:11Speaker 2: something I'm comfortable with and I have a successful career.
- 42:14Speaker 2: After some interrogation, I found out that my step mom
- 42:17Speaker 2: told my mom and dad that I was doing OnlyFans
- 42:20Speaker 2: because I had once asked an offhand question about, oh,
- 42:23Speaker 2: what do people put on their taxes if they're making
- 42:24Speaker 2: bank doing that sort of work. That was last year.
- 42:27Speaker 2: We haven't spoken since my dad called with her on
- 42:29Speaker 2: the line to host the apology. We haven't had a
- 42:32Speaker 2: genuine conversation since, and that's over a year, which is
- 42:36Speaker 2: extremely unlike us. How do I get us both to
- 42:39Speaker 2: move on? I feel like I need a genuine apology
- 42:41Speaker 2: where my dad isn't policing the phone call, and it
- 42:43Speaker 2: appears she's fine going on without speaking forever. Please help.
- 42:47Speaker 2: I want our relationship back, but I need more from her.
- 42:50Speaker 2: Savannah Hi, Savannah, Hi, Savannah Hi, Kelsey Hi.
- 42:55Speaker 1: In your stepmom's defense, you look like you could have
- 42:57Speaker 1: your own only fans.
- 42:58Speaker 2: You're very hot.
- 42:59Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what I mean. So, and women like
- 43:03Speaker 1: that are always think younger girls are up to something,
- 43:05Speaker 1: and I'm like, I'm not up to half the shit
- 43:07Speaker 1: you think I'm up to. I'm just honest about what
- 43:09Speaker 1: I am doing. So it sounds a lot worse because
- 43:11Speaker 1: everybody else is lying. But anyway, so she's just like
- 43:14Speaker 1: kind of holding a grudge against you since that happened.
- 43:17Speaker 1: Do you feel like or it's just not the same
- 43:18Speaker 1: since she confronted you.
- 43:20Speaker 6: I think she's afraid to talk to me again after
- 43:22Speaker 6: she knows that she spread a rumor about me that
- 43:25Speaker 6: was really damaging, especially in a really vulnerable time. I
- 43:28Speaker 6: was just getting out of rehab, been figuring out what
- 43:30Speaker 6: do people think of me? Now I'm going it back
- 43:31Speaker 6: into the workforce. How do I explain this your gap
- 43:33Speaker 6: I took, so I was really dealing with insecurity. So
- 43:36Speaker 6: she hit me at a really low point. So when
- 43:39Speaker 6: my dad called and said, you know, your stepmom's on
- 43:42Speaker 6: the phone, and she kind of just said, well, we
- 43:44Speaker 6: didn't know what you were doing, so I just didn't know.
- 43:46Speaker 6: And I'm like, that's not a valid enough excuse to
- 43:49Speaker 6: make up the rumor that you did. So we've just
- 43:52Speaker 6: been going for about a year with really not reaching
- 43:55Speaker 6: out to each other, seeing each other at big family
- 43:57Speaker 6: events and kind of saying hi and I we need
- 44:00Speaker 6: to have another conversation to really clear the error.
- 44:03Speaker 1: Well, this is probably a good step in your recovery,
- 44:05Speaker 1: actually to have an adult conversation that isn't acrimonious. And
- 44:08Speaker 1: to actually say, hey, listen, I know things haven't been
- 44:11Speaker 1: the same in the last year, and I just want
- 44:13Speaker 1: you to know exactly why it struck me so hard
- 44:16Speaker 1: because I was in such a vulnerable spot in my life.
- 44:19Speaker 1: You really that was so unfair that you assumed because
- 44:22Speaker 1: I asked one question and so I really really hurt me.
- 44:26Speaker 1: And but I we're past that, I hope, and I
- 44:28Speaker 1: would love to like work towards building back our relationship, right,
- 44:32Speaker 1: I mean, that's all reasonable.
- 44:33Speaker 3: Absolutely.
- 44:34Speaker 6: I think I just wish she had the gumption to
- 44:37Speaker 6: you know, I have a stepsister who she fonds over,
- 44:38Speaker 6: and she should, that's her daughter. But I just wish
- 44:41Speaker 6: I felt like she knows like something's wrong and she
- 44:43Speaker 6: misses the relationship too, because it feels like we're just
- 44:46Speaker 6: in the stalemate forever.
- 44:47Speaker 1: I know, But don't wish for what you can do,
- 44:50Speaker 1: like you could be a bigger person here. Kevin was
- 44:52Speaker 1: trying to say, what were you trying to say?
- 44:54Speaker 5: Well, Chelsea, for one of the few times you're actually
- 44:56Speaker 5: kind of write and I'd never actually say that. I never,
- 45:00Speaker 5: I've really never I think I've ever agreed with you.
- 45:03Speaker 5: This is probably like, yeah, this is probably like one
- 45:04Speaker 5: of the first times I feel like you said something good.
- 45:08Speaker 5: I'm going to give you a really good cut to
- 45:10Speaker 5: the chase moment. And this is what a volume of people,
- 45:14Speaker 5: high volume of people suffer from. Right. I was talking
- 45:16Speaker 5: about it earlier, like the expectation of what you feel
- 45:20Speaker 5: you would do, you put on someone else and if
- 45:22Speaker 5: they don't meet that expectation, it bothers you. Right, people
- 45:27Speaker 5: are so afraid to just be direct and have forward
- 45:30Speaker 5: facing conversations like a year a year gap of a
- 45:35Speaker 5: fall in a relationship doesn't make sense to something that's
- 45:38Speaker 5: honestly not that difficult. It's this isn't a hard problem.
- 45:42Speaker 5: Is she wrong for assuming that you were doing something? Absolutely?
- 45:46Speaker 5: Is it uncommon for women today to be doing the
- 45:49Speaker 5: thing that she assumed or that she thought based off
- 45:52Speaker 5: of whatever was she heard.
- 45:53Speaker 4: It is what it is, you got.
- 45:55Speaker 5: It's a multi billion dollar business where everybody's doing it.
- 45:58Speaker 5: And by the way, it doesn't mean that if you
- 46:00Speaker 5: were you're doing porn. You could be posting regular pictures.
- 46:03Speaker 1: You can have your toes, you be wearing toes, spaceers.
- 46:05Speaker 1: There's a lot of footation.
- 46:07Speaker 4: It could be anything I thought about toes.
- 46:09Speaker 5: Okay, listen, it could it could be anything, And I'm
- 46:11Speaker 5: just saying the first assumption in thought attached to it
- 46:14Speaker 5: doesn't have to be the worst. So there is just
- 46:17Speaker 5: an assumption and assumption that's taking place. You're hurt because
- 46:22Speaker 5: of her assumption and you think that I'm doing something
- 46:24Speaker 5: that I would never do.
- 46:26Speaker 4: She's like, well, I.
- 46:27Speaker 5: Thought because of what you said, and okay, I spun
- 46:30Speaker 5: it and put it out there. It's a real easy conversation. Hey,
- 46:33Speaker 5: we were close. It's real stupid for us to have
- 46:35Speaker 5: this thing holding over our head. I just didn't like
- 46:37Speaker 5: your timing of it. You know what I was going through,
- 46:39Speaker 5: and I felt from you, if anybody, you should actually
- 46:43Speaker 5: have a little more sensitivity in knowing how vulnerable I
- 46:46Speaker 5: was at that time. Now, if you didn't, maybe we
- 46:48Speaker 5: missed some key conversations. But how was that a low
- 46:51Speaker 5: and coming out? You hitting me with that? It kind
- 46:53Speaker 5: of put me back down. And like now as I'm
- 46:56Speaker 5: becoming like back to myself of old and experiencing life
- 47:01Speaker 5: and loving life, I'm realizing that I'm missing what we
- 47:03Speaker 5: once had. I want to work on getting back there,
- 47:06Speaker 5: but I need you to understand where I was. And
- 47:09Speaker 5: also I want to hear from you just in like
- 47:12Speaker 5: addressing that and being accountable for that, then let's move
- 47:14Speaker 5: on from it.
- 47:15Speaker 4: But it's a.
- 47:15Speaker 5: Five minute to ten minute conversation. These things don't have
- 47:18Speaker 5: to be drawn out.
- 47:19Speaker 1: And you're being the bigger person because she's your stepmother,
- 47:22Speaker 1: so technically she is the more mature, older version of
- 47:25Speaker 1: a woman who should have been, you know, making these
- 47:27Speaker 1: inroads to you already. But this is a great exercise
- 47:30Speaker 1: to actually just say fuck it, I don't care about
- 47:32Speaker 1: the smallness of another person. I'm going to be the
- 47:34Speaker 1: big person and say, yeah, no problem. I mean, you know,
- 47:38Speaker 1: it's over, but this is where I was coming from,
- 47:40Speaker 1: and I'd love to build back our relationship and get
- 47:42Speaker 1: back to normal.
- 47:43Speaker 5: This feels awkward, and guess what if the relationship doesn't
- 47:46Speaker 5: make it back to the standards of old, it happens.
- 47:49Speaker 5: It's life like. So holding on to a concept, or
- 47:54Speaker 5: holding on to this feeling of old like that may
- 47:58Speaker 5: not be in your best entry for the new version
- 48:01Speaker 5: of yourself that you've now become. So don't be afraid
- 48:04Speaker 5: to say, okay, like, if we don't get back, we don't.
- 48:06Speaker 4: But at least I got this off my chest.
- 48:08Speaker 5: So you can know how I feel, and I know
- 48:10Speaker 5: that I was very adult with how I approached you.
- 48:13Speaker 5: It was very much mature. This isn't a Caddy moment
- 48:16Speaker 5: of back and forth. This is one of simple understanding,
- 48:18Speaker 5: and I feel like if we had that as.
- 48:19Speaker 1: Good Absolutely I agree with all of that, and then
- 48:22Speaker 1: at the end you can just say and thanks for
- 48:23Speaker 1: the great idea. I actually started an OnlyFans page and
- 48:26Speaker 1: I'm crushing it.
- 48:27Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, by the way, I'm thinking about.
- 48:30Speaker 1: It because you need more money. Well, oh for her,
- 48:34Speaker 1: I thought about that.
- 48:35Speaker 6: We had a trip to Chicago where you're watching my
- 48:37Speaker 6: niece and nephew, and it's thought about just saying like, oh,
- 48:39Speaker 6: I'm going to disappear for an hour. I've got an
- 48:40Speaker 6: appointment with my only fans, so we'll be right back.
- 48:43Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 48:44Speaker 1: Yeah, But I think that's the bigger picture, you know,
- 48:47Speaker 1: always just step above when people are bringing like being
- 48:50Speaker 1: low about something, just be bigger and congrats. Yeah.
- 48:53Speaker 6: I guess I'm just afraid that if I come with
- 48:55Speaker 6: that that she'll hide from it or won't address it,
- 48:59Speaker 6: or I won't get the resolute.
- 49:00Speaker 1: It doesn't matter what you get, it matters how you
- 49:02Speaker 1: go after it, like you be the bigger person. You
- 49:04Speaker 1: do it. If you don't get the results you desire,
- 49:07Speaker 1: that's on her, that's not on you.
- 49:09Speaker 4: Done your part, Chelsea.
- 49:10Speaker 2: Actually you brought this up on another episode recently. Was
- 49:14Speaker 2: forgiving someone before you get the apology, you know, and
- 49:17Speaker 2: you had sort of the forest apology. But I wonder
- 49:19Speaker 2: if you can go in, you know, with a sense
- 49:21Speaker 2: of empathy, like she might be feeling kind of embarrassed
- 49:23Speaker 2: about what she did, Yeah, and like going in being
- 49:26Speaker 2: like I like, spend some time with yourself, forgive her
- 49:30Speaker 2: and then approach it.
- 49:31Speaker 1: Do you know what your dad said to her? Because
- 49:33Speaker 1: I bet you your dad gave her an aar full
- 49:34Speaker 1: about that.
- 49:36Speaker 6: So my dad had to call me one morning, early
- 49:38Speaker 6: in the morning, and he was like, and my dad
- 49:40Speaker 6: and I are very close. He'll always see me as
- 49:42Speaker 6: his little girl. You know, we talk three times a week.
- 49:45Speaker 6: But it was the worst call ever, you call me
- 49:47Speaker 6: early in the morning. He just said, are you doing porn? Which,
- 49:49Speaker 6: hearing that from his mouth, I was just like, oh,
- 49:52Speaker 6: I told him no. He believes me. He is frustrating
- 49:55Speaker 6: now that there's tension, of course, so the rumors put
- 49:58Speaker 6: to bed. But I know he's just wishes the tension
- 50:00Speaker 6: would be over, and he has. He believes my side.
- 50:03Speaker 6: He knows that that's not what I was up to.
- 50:05Speaker 6: So yeah, it's really just the between us that's left.
- 50:08Speaker 1: Yeah, well, congratulations on getting sober. Kevin has been struggling
- 50:11Speaker 1: with his sobriety since I met him.
- 50:15Speaker 5: Well, you know, I have little shoes, so it's tough
- 50:17Speaker 5: to kick it.
- 50:20Speaker 1: No, I did not get that. I don't think about
- 50:22Speaker 1: that try together.
- 50:25Speaker 5: Lucky, lucky enough, I haven't. But I do admire those
- 50:29Speaker 5: that have made it out of the fire. So that's
- 50:32Speaker 5: pretty dope to hear you say I did. I was,
- 50:35Speaker 5: but I am now. Yeah, I think that's Uh, that's special.
- 50:38Speaker 5: Real heroes don't always wear capes, buddy.
- 50:40Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, thanks for calling by Savannah. Thanks, Savannah really
- 50:46Speaker 1: looked like a Savannah. No, I know.
- 50:48Speaker 4: So, just to be clear, there is no link.
- 50:51Speaker 2: Oh no, there is no, although she said on our
- 50:54Speaker 2: interview her cousin does only fans, so it's like a thing,
- 50:57Speaker 2: you know, that's in the realm of reality for her family.
- 51:00Speaker 2: Saying no, there's no link is very hot. Anyway, moving along,
- 51:06Speaker 2: Moving along, Well, let's take a quick break and we'll
- 51:09Speaker 2: be back to wrap up with a very stupid question.
- 51:11Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, we're gonna take a break. I'm gonna give
- 51:13Speaker 1: Kevin a quick bath, and we'll be right back. And
- 51:22Speaker 1: we're back with Kevin Hart.
- 51:26Speaker 2: We are, and we're back with a final kind of
- 51:29Speaker 2: dumb question.
- 51:30Speaker 1: Perfect.
- 51:30Speaker 2: That's a great way to end us, Gina says, dear Chelsea.
- 51:34Speaker 1: This what this, some of our conversations today is probably
- 51:38Speaker 1: some of the most serious conversations we've ever had. Even
- 51:41Speaker 1: though this I wouldn't consider this a serious conversation, there
- 51:44Speaker 1: were moments of seriousness within the conversation. I think so
- 51:47Speaker 1: for you and me, because usually it's not very serious question.
- 51:52Speaker 4: Some of those questions like required a good peal.
- 51:55Speaker 1: You know, I mean, even our own conversation before the questions.
- 51:58Speaker 4: Yes, this was a lot. It was.
- 52:00Speaker 1: There's harassment coming from one of us to the other person.
- 52:03Speaker 1: To me. Yeah, usually that's true. I'm not gonna lie.
- 52:05Speaker 1: And you take the abuse very well. You almost seem
- 52:08Speaker 1: to enjoy it. Well, yeah, I mean I've just grown
- 52:09Speaker 1: accustomed to it, right, Okay, Yes, that's what I wanted
- 52:12Speaker 1: to say.
- 52:15Speaker 2: Well, Gina says dear Chelsea. I couldn't think of a
- 52:18Speaker 2: better person to help me decide if I should listen
- 52:20Speaker 2: to the little devil on my shoulder that wants me
- 52:23Speaker 2: to seek some mostly innocent revenge on my husband. We
- 52:27Speaker 2: have been happily married for one year and living together
- 52:29Speaker 2: for three While living together has come with the expected
- 52:32Speaker 2: amounts of uncovering stupid shit we are going to argue about.
- 52:36Speaker 2: There's one silly thing we haven't come to a resolution
- 52:38Speaker 2: on the water diverter in the tub slash shower. He
- 52:42Speaker 2: thinks it's no big deal to leave it on the
- 52:44Speaker 2: shower setting, and I think it's a common courtesy to
- 52:47Speaker 2: put it back to the tub setting so no one
- 52:49Speaker 2: gets sprayed in the face with cold water at six am.
- 52:52Speaker 2: I'm sure you can guess which of us keeps getting
- 52:54Speaker 2: sprayed in the face at six am. But I'm not
- 52:56Speaker 2: here to discuss our disagreement nor our flaws, I said,
- 53:00Speaker 2: I'm here to discuss revenge. We recently installed a dog
- 53:04Speaker 2: shower attachment in our home's only bathroom. Ever since we
- 53:07Speaker 2: installed it, I can't help but think, how if I
- 53:10Speaker 2: just accidentally leave the diverter in the new dog shower position,
- 53:13Speaker 2: he will get sprayed directly in the face.
- 53:15Speaker 1: I do it absolutely no question. First of all, I
- 53:19Speaker 1: want to thank you for bringing a question like this
- 53:20Speaker 1: to the podcast because we need more levity, and I
- 53:23Speaker 1: like the stupidity of this and absolutely retaliate against your husband.
- 53:28Speaker 1: That's so funny. After we I just gave you a bath,
- 53:30Speaker 1: that we get a bath sub question.
- 53:32Speaker 5: That's actually it's not. But I just want to back
- 53:34Speaker 5: up the dog diverter in the in their shower. Yeah, yes,
- 53:38Speaker 5: I sure I heard that.
- 53:39Speaker 7: Correctly, and the only one in the guaranteed to be
- 53:44Speaker 7: So the dog takes the shower a couple or in
- 53:47Speaker 7: the same shower, that's a bigger question.
- 53:51Speaker 4: More Again, I'm going to guess that these people are white.
- 53:53Speaker 1: If I have the guess, why do you say that?
- 53:57Speaker 1: Why are you being discriminatory? Well, fill a little.
- 54:00Speaker 4: I'm willing to bet the farm on this one.
- 54:02Speaker 1: Why would you say that white people would have Why?
- 54:05Speaker 1: Because black people what the dogs?
- 54:07Speaker 5: The dog is probably showering with the holes outside. There's
- 54:12Speaker 5: no such thing as a diverter in the black household,
- 54:16Speaker 5: especially not in the one bathroom in the house. Get
- 54:19Speaker 5: that goddamn dog outside and don't get that out there,
- 54:23Speaker 5: that dog in the bucket and figure it out.
- 54:26Speaker 4: That's what it is.
- 54:26Speaker 1: It is so true. You don't let your dog sleep
- 54:29Speaker 1: in the bed. No, Black people don't like that.
- 54:32Speaker 4: No.
- 54:33Speaker 1: All my black friends when they ever see me, they go,
- 54:34Speaker 1: you look like one of those girls who sleeps in
- 54:36Speaker 1: bed with your dogs. And my other friend Yahya always goes.
- 54:39Speaker 1: White girls don't wash their legs. We've talked about this.
- 54:42Speaker 1: White girls don't wash their legs. I go, why do
- 54:45Speaker 1: my legs need to be washed? They're fucking covered, Like
- 54:49Speaker 1: my legs are going out without me, and when I
- 54:51Speaker 1: take a shower, all the soap from my shower comes down. Tiffany,
- 54:55Speaker 1: I had this conversation with two.
- 54:57Speaker 4: So you feel like that's It's not like my legs are.
- 55:00Speaker 1: Out there gardening all day without me. Wash your legs. No,
- 55:07Speaker 1: I don't think so.
- 55:08Speaker 4: Yeah, what do you mean? You don't think what.
- 55:10Speaker 1: Is going on with your legs that they need washing?
- 55:12Speaker 5: It's your body. You wash your body, Chelsea, your entire body.
- 55:17Speaker 5: You don't pick and choose.
- 55:18Speaker 1: I have hot spots. I have hot spots that I wash.
- 55:23Speaker 1: I get one, two, three, four, and I get those going,
- 55:27Speaker 1: and then and then the fifth is the head, and
- 55:29Speaker 1: then everything is fine.
- 55:30Speaker 4: No, it's not Chelsea, I.
- 55:32Speaker 1: Want to cleaning in between your toes? Who got in there?
- 55:36Speaker 4: What do you mean?
- 55:36Speaker 1: Who got it in my leg?
- 55:39Speaker 4: You that it's dirt and me? You see how to
- 55:41Speaker 4: back your he is right.
- 55:42Speaker 1: Now with clean clothes over it.
- 55:44Speaker 5: Okay, yes, but you're you're gonna conjure of sweat on
- 55:47Speaker 5: the back of you.
- 55:47Speaker 1: No, I don't. I'm not a molester. Why would I
- 55:50Speaker 1: be sweating on the backs of my knees.
- 55:51Speaker 4: Because you sit You're sitting with your legs crawls.
- 55:54Speaker 1: Yeah, criss cross apple sauce.
- 55:55Speaker 4: Okay, this is a hot spot behind these.
- 55:57Speaker 1: Is a hot No, no, no, not for maybe for you,
- 55:59Speaker 1: it's not for me, okay.
- 56:01Speaker 4: Because this is just what we're culturally different.
- 56:03Speaker 1: Well yeah, I guess so.
- 56:04Speaker 5: Well, I'm just telling you it really is. And this
- 56:07Speaker 5: is the thing that we just had to nip in
- 56:08Speaker 5: the butt. Also, you probably don't even use like a washwrag.
- 56:11Speaker 4: You're like a hand.
- 56:12Speaker 1: I don't use a wash oh my god.
- 56:15Speaker 4: Oh because your hands have because your hands are why scrubble? Oh?
- 56:24Speaker 4: Because you have the the loofahs on your hands?
- 56:27Speaker 1: Why why don't you Why is sleeping with the dogs?
- 56:30Speaker 1: I mean I understand that that is that that is
- 56:32Speaker 1: actually dirty?
- 56:33Speaker 4: Yes?
- 56:33Speaker 1: Who cares?
- 56:34Speaker 4: What do you mean? Who cares? That's my bed, that's
- 56:37Speaker 4: my bed.
- 56:38Speaker 5: The dogs are outside all day running around in the backyard,
- 56:41Speaker 5: playing and stuff that you want them to come in,
- 56:43Speaker 5: jump in the bed, sleep in the bed.
- 56:45Speaker 1: You've never pissed the bed and slept in it?
- 56:48Speaker 5: No, you wake up after you do it. Now, definitely
- 56:50Speaker 5: I have wet the bed of young, young and old age.
- 56:53Speaker 5: I am definitely guilty of that. But immediately I get
- 56:57Speaker 5: up and this has to be changed. This has to
- 56:59Speaker 5: be this.
- 57:00Speaker 1: I I once this is not a flattering story, and
- 57:03Speaker 1: that's why I'll share it. I once was very I
- 57:08Speaker 1: don't remember what drugs I was on, but I was
- 57:10Speaker 1: on something and we were in bed and I had
- 57:13Speaker 1: to pee so many times before I could go to sleep.
- 57:15Speaker 1: And we were in a hotel room in Vegas. This
- 57:18Speaker 1: is when I was in my twenties, and I was
- 57:20Speaker 1: so sick of getting up to pee that I just said,
- 57:22Speaker 1: I'm just gonna pee right here, and I'm going to
- 57:25Speaker 1: move over onto the other side of the bed. And
- 57:27Speaker 1: I thought I could do that. And then when I
- 57:29Speaker 1: moved over to the other side of the bed, I
- 57:31Speaker 1: was like this is disgusting. I can't pee there too, yeah,
- 57:34Speaker 1: because it sprints. Yeah, and that was the last time
- 57:37Speaker 1: I peed in the bed.
- 57:38Speaker 5: By the way, this is a good moment just to
- 57:40Speaker 5: kind of point out to the listeners that this is
- 57:41Speaker 5: who you're asking your questions to, right, this is who
- 57:46Speaker 5: you are.
- 57:47Speaker 4: Asking for sound advice from the woman.
- 57:49Speaker 5: I felt that she could peel on one side of
- 57:51Speaker 5: the bed and roll over and that here wouldn't be
- 57:55Speaker 5: pee there and then no, forget the smell, none of
- 57:58Speaker 5: that stuff matters. Okay, I'm gonna change her name from
- 58:01Speaker 5: Chelsea to Hotspot Hotspot Chelsea because you already watch her.
- 58:11Speaker 1: What if I I I go into the shower like
- 58:15Speaker 1: it's an emergency. I don't want to be light lingering
- 58:18Speaker 1: in there, so I have to get all the zones
- 58:20Speaker 1: right away, just in case, because I've treated like a
- 58:23Speaker 1: fire drill.
- 58:24Speaker 4: No, why are you in a rush?
- 58:26Speaker 1: So if I dilly dally around with my legs in
- 58:29Speaker 1: my arms, you're adding.
- 58:30Speaker 4: A three minute You're adding a three minute times.
- 58:34Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't like being in the shower for that long,
- 58:36Speaker 1: So that's probably it is.
- 58:37Speaker 5: Really this is so interesting to me because this debate
- 58:40Speaker 5: is ongoing it's the one thing. Like, you know, there's
- 58:44Speaker 5: so much that we discussed, but nobody wants to just
- 58:47Speaker 5: nip this in the bud, and I think it all
- 58:49Speaker 5: goes away.
- 58:50Speaker 4: We would feel more.
- 58:51Speaker 5: Comfortable as a culture if we were just here some
- 58:54Speaker 5: white people say, you know what, I understand the washcloth
- 58:57Speaker 5: and I get it. Okay, if that's this is about,
- 59:01Speaker 5: I'll meet you halfway and I'll use a washcloth.
- 59:03Speaker 4: That doesn't mean I'm going to wash my entire body,
- 59:06Speaker 4: but I will.
- 59:07Speaker 5: I'll start by at least admitting that the use of
- 59:10Speaker 5: the washcloth is important. And then and then we can
- 59:12Speaker 5: we can rest there and I think we can work
- 59:14Speaker 5: on the other stuff in steps. But the the the
- 59:18Speaker 5: double bang of no washcloth and only hotspots, that's a lot.
- 59:24Speaker 4: That's a lot to digest.
- 59:25Speaker 1: Kevin. I want to thank you for coming over today.
- 59:27Speaker 5: What the fuck man, Okay, that's why are you acting
- 59:31Speaker 5: like that?
- 59:32Speaker 4: Feels like I had.
- 59:33Speaker 1: Well, he's his dog sniffing you.
- 59:35Speaker 5: But it's the way he looks at me while he's
- 59:38Speaker 5: doing very like, what's his deal?
- 59:40Speaker 1: Confrontational? Yeah, you've had a problem with all of my dogs,
- 59:43Speaker 1: every dog I've had. You're never friendly to.
- 59:45Speaker 4: Dog because they all think I'm fifty cent.
- 59:47Speaker 1: No, they don't think you're fifty cent.
- 59:49Speaker 4: They think him fifty.
- 59:51Speaker 2: Before we wrap, Kevin, what do you say to Gina?
- 59:54Speaker 2: I know, Chelsea, you say, SPRAYM in the face? Should
- 59:56Speaker 2: Gina spray?
- 59:58Speaker 5: I want Gina to fucking get a hobby, Okay, I
- 1:00:00Speaker 5: want Jama. I want Gina to figure out what else
- 1:00:04Speaker 5: to do during the day instead of talking to me
- 1:00:06Speaker 5: about the goddamn shower settings. Just like, so what do
- 1:00:12Speaker 5: I do? I mean, what do you guys think? Do
- 1:00:14Speaker 5: I get them back? Or do I I feel like
- 1:00:17Speaker 5: it's payback? Like what are you talking about? Like, God,
- 1:00:19Speaker 5: damn it. Do you want to switch it yourself? If
- 1:00:23Speaker 5: you know what's there? It is?
- 1:00:24Speaker 2: I feel like it automatically happens. Usually it's supposed to automate. Anyway.
- 1:00:28Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway is right? Anyway. This is the end of
- 1:00:32Speaker 1: this episode and the episode. The episode's title will be
- 1:00:35Speaker 1: called Anyway, not to be confused with any ways.
- 1:00:39Speaker 4: Good night, good one, good night man.
- 1:00:41Speaker 1: See you next week.
- 1:00:42Speaker 4: Love you, Chelsea, thank you, I love you, Kevin.
- 1:00:45Speaker 1: My upcoming shows are Brooklyn on November eighth, Bethlehem, November ninth, Philadelphia,
- 1:00:50Speaker 1: November tenth, and then I'm going to Texas November fifteenth, sixteenth,
- 1:00:54Speaker 1: and seventeenth. I will be in Dallas, Austin, and Sugarland, Texas,
- 1:00:59Speaker 1: and then I have another show in Vegas on November thirtieth.
- 1:01:02Speaker 1: San Diego is November twenty ninth, and then Des Moines, Omaha,
- 1:01:06Speaker 1: New Orleans, and Atlantic to close out the year. So
- 1:01:09Speaker 1: check Chelseahandler dot com for tickets and I will see
- 1:01:12Speaker 1: you there.
- 1:01:13Speaker 2: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email
- 1:01:15Speaker 2: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be
- 1:01:18Speaker 2: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited
- 1:01:21Speaker 2: and engineered by Brad Dickert executive producer Catherine Law and
- 1:01:25Speaker 2: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot
- 1:01:27Speaker 2: com