Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Why the Narcissist’s New Supply HATES You

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Why the Narcissist’s New Supply HATES You · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:00
  So why does the narcissist new supply hate you when they maybe
• 0:06
  have never even gotten to know you and y'all have never ever
• 0:09
  met but it's clear that they cannot stand you?
• 0:15
  Why is that? That's what we talked about
• 0:17
  today, y'all. Of course, if you knew, my name
• 0:23
  is Lee Hammock. I'm a diagnosed narcissist
• 0:25
  myself, here to give you the inside look at the mine of a
• 0:29
  narcissist and let's hop right into it, y'all.
• 0:32
  These toxic narcissistic people be lying.
• 0:35
  Be lying not, not like the king of the jungle lion, not like the
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  roar, not like the lion and roars.
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  We're talking about lying. LYING.
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  They lie. They've lied to you.
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  They lie to everybody. No one is immune to a narcissist
• 0:54
  lying. Right?
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  Got it. Good.
• 0:58
  So with that being clear, with that being stated, you have to
• 1:02
  understand that narcissistic people lie to the new supply, to
• 1:07
  the new supply. They are love bombing them.
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  So they can pretty much say whatever they want to about you,
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  the ex who they might who might not even be an ex, you might not
• 1:17
  even be an ex yet they can be cheating on you with the new
• 1:22
  supply and the new supply hates you.
• 1:24
  Do y'all understand what I'm doing?
• 1:26
  My one-on-one coaching? How many times I've heard
• 1:29
  somebody say, well, the narcissist, well I was, well
• 1:33
  they were married, but the narcissist convinced me that
• 1:35
  they were getting divorced and their partner was horrible to
• 1:37
  them. Their spouse was treating them
• 1:39
  horribly and I was their shining Grays and they never felt loved
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  like this before. Even though they were married
• 1:45
  and had four kids and two grandkids.
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  They never loved anybody that much as they loved me and I
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  believed it. And I hated their ex.
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  I hated the old supply because I didn't get an opportunity to
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  know them. Narcissistic people want to keep
• 2:01
  you separate, want to keep you separate from the new supply.
• 2:04
  They want to keep the supplies separate.
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  Because if the supplies are not separate, they start to mix,
• 2:10
  right? And they start to start to share
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  stories. They start to tell who I really
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  AM, what I have going on, how I how I've actually been behaving,
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  what I who, what I have going on mentally, how I treated them,
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  what money I do have, what job I really have.
• 2:28
  Was I in the Army or not? The what what what happened
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  right here you some of that. There's so many lies that
• 2:34
  narcissistic people can tell that if y'all start talking or
• 2:38
  being cool, those lies evaporate, Those lies explode.
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  Those lies collapse in on themselves.
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  So in order to keep y'all separate, I have to lie.
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  I have to make y'all hate each other.
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  I do. Y'all imagine you hating
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  somebody you never met based on the opinion of somebody that you
• 2:58
  just getting to know. That's what happens to so many
• 3:01
  people. Yeah, but I'm doing my
• 3:02
  one-on-one coaching. I've talked to some new supplies
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  and former new supplies all the time.
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  And they say this. They'd be saying that I feel
• 3:09
  embarrassedly because I hated somebody I never met based on
• 3:13
  this person, because I was, I was getting love bombed.
• 3:16
  They convinced me that they were getting treated so horribly in
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  the past that they had to strangle them, that they had to
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  beat them with a pistol. They had a pistol with them.
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  They had to abandon the kids. They had to do this.
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  I was convinced and I believed it.
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  It's neither here nor there, right?
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  But they do. They're convincing people.
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  They want to convince you they want to hurt you, they want to
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  harm you. They want to put, they want to
• 3:40
  put all this stuff together because it benefits them.
• 3:42
  Y'all, let's just keep, I try to keep it as hot and as ready as I
• 3:45
  possibly can when I'm talking about narcissistic people
• 3:48
  because the hot, the hotter and the fresher that I can keep it,
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  the more it benefits everybody. So if you're dealing with a new
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  supply that hates you, ask yourself this question.
• 3:57
  Why? Why do they hate me?
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  They never met me because what? What's the what's the common
• 4:02
  denominator here? The narcissist, yo, toxic,
• 4:06
  narcissistic X is the common denominator.
• 4:08
  They're spreading lies. They're telling the new supply
• 4:12
  that you treated them horribly, so they hate you.
• 4:16
  Yeah. I talked to somebody very
• 4:17
  recently, right? And it was like their new fiance
• 4:20
  hates me. We had never really had a chance
• 4:22
  to sit down. They convinced the new supply.
• 4:25
  They convinced their new their new fiance that I was treating
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  them horribly and that I'd make their life harder because we
• 4:31
  have we have to Co parent. So he takes his anger out on her
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  and she hates me because he's angry at her like he's he's oh,
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  I'm just sorry for cousin and yelling at you.
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  But my ex, my baby Mama treat me.
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  She still gets get on my nerves and I don't know how to process
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  it. So I just treat you horribly.
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  So we both have a common enemy. So the new supply starts to hate
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  you because they they think that you're messing up their
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  relationship. You know why they did they
• 5:02
  bitter, they jealous, they jealous of us.
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  They so bitter right now. That's why they keep that's why
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  they make my life harder. They my my ex bitter even though
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  she moved on, even though she doing better, even though she
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  upgraded in every single way possible and I'm homeless.
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  We live in after. We live in my car.
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  They jealous us. We have freedom.
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  They are free. We got freedom and they don't.
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  You see what I'm saying? That's why they jealous.
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  That's why she gets so angry right here.
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  You should hate her. We we, we, we unhoused because
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  of her. Because of her.
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  My ex. My old supply.
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  You the new supply. We homeless.
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  We unhoused because of her. Yeah.
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  Yeah. Don't that sound crazy, Al?
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  But I'm telling you, that's how some people that that's what
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  some people deal with. The new supply doesn't really
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  hate you. Let me rephrase that.
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  Sometimes they do hate you, right?
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  But most times they don't hate you.
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  They hate the image of the they hate the image of you that the
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  narcissist has created in their heads.
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  They hate what they they hate what they think you are.
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  They hate who they think you are, not who you actually are.
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  They hate who the narcissist told them that you are.
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  So yes, they are treating you horribly and messing with your
• 6:24
  head based on this right here. And this is the type of stuff.
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  These are the type of things that they will consistently do.
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  They love doing stuff like this because it benefits them.
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  Narcissist love drama. They love chaos.
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  They thrive in it. They'll tell the new supply that
• 6:39
  you still want them. Yeah, they'll literally tell the
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  news of if even if you, even if you have moved on and got
• 6:47
  married and somebody else started a whole new family,
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  they'll tell the new supply that you still want them and that you
• 6:54
  be texting them all kinds of crazy stuff that you'd be trying
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  to send them nudes or whatever the case may be, right.
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  And the new supply will hate you based on that.
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  Yeah. My, my ex.
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  We want me back all the time. I I'd be happy.
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  She won't be listening. I told her I'm happy with you.
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  I'd say I'm happier than I ever, ever were with you.
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  I'm happy with the new supply. OK.
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  Leave me alone. Stop sending me these naked
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  pictures. I don't want it anymore.
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  But I'm not going to block you. Because no, I don't want to
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  block you. Blocking this child is right.
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  I'm not going to block you. You see how crazy that sounds?
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  But do a lot of people fall into that trap right there?
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  Absolutely yes. So many people fall into that
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  narcissistic trap of believing everything that that narcissist
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  has to say. They believe every single word
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  that the narcissist utters. They utters like a cow utter
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  comes out of their damn mouth like bull, like some BS and raw
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  milk, right? Comes out of the cow utter and
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  it messes with them. So again, if you're dealing with
• 7:54
  a person that has his personality type, take a deep
• 7:56
  breath. If you're dealing with a new
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  supply that hates you, take a deep breath because realize that
• 8:02
  you were a victim of this narcissist too.
• 8:05
  They are all if you are a victim and you think you're dealing in.
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  If you are were a victim of this person of your ex and you think
• 8:12
  that they are narcissist or a narcissist or highly
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  narcissistic, then they are getting abused too.
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  The new supply is getting abused in some way, shape or form,
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  right? They're getting gas lit, they're
• 8:25
  getting manipulated. They're getting the same thing
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  that you got. I'm not saying this to get you
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  to feel sorry for them. Of course they are still adults.
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  They can control their reaction. They don't have to send you evil
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  me messages or threatening messages or stalk or harass you,
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  right? Based on this, they need to get
• 8:38
  that under control. But if it's bothering you right
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  now, you, just like you can't have a good day because you're
• 8:43
  thinking about what the new supplies going to say.
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  Just understand that it really is not about you.
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  It truly isn't. It's about them.
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  It's about how they perceive things.
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  It's about their world. And that the narcissist has
• 8:56
  become the center of their universe, has become their son,
• 8:59
  and they're orbiting around his narcissist.
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  They feel like they need the narcissist.
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  They feel like they have to appease the narcissist.
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  And how do I? What's the fastest way to
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  appease the narcissist? You hate the same people that
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  they hate you blindly. You are.
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  You offer blind loyalty to them, you've become super extremely
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  subservient to them. You do everything that they ask
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  you to do without them having to beat you.
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  You know what I'm saying? That's what the new supply is
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  doing. They're trying to get the
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  loyalty of the narcissist. I'm not too.
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  I'm not saying hey, if they're attacking you and harassing you,
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  of course go to the police if that makes you feel better,
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  right? I'm just saying if it's
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  bothering you just emotionally and you just having bad days
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  thinking about it, take it off of you.
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  Because even though it seems like they are personally
• 9:45
  attacking you, they are not. They are personally unhappy.
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  Happy people don't attack their exes ex.
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  That happy people don't harass and stalk and belittle their new
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  partners X. That's not what a happy person
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  does. That's what a person trying to
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  fit in does. That's what a codependent person
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  does. That's what a a highly it easily
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  manipulated person does. They go about doing things
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  exactly like that right there. So that's something you have to
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  consider when you're trying to move forward, when you're trying
• 10:16
  to process what you're going through and you're trying to
• 10:18
  just have a good day. Because I know good days can be
• 10:21
  few and far between when you have a you're dealing with a
• 10:23
  personality type like this, right?
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  Having a good day, dealing with somebody like this can be an
• 10:27
  extremely tough thing. It's hard to predict when you
• 10:30
  can have those good days, right. So how are you?
• 10:34
  I'm OK. I'm keep this in short and sweet
• 10:35
  to the point. Yeah.
• 10:37
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• 10:39
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• 10:43
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• 10:46
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• 10:48
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• 10:50
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• 10:54
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• 10:55
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• 10:58
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• 11:01
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• 11:04
  Y'all appreciate y'all shout out to y'all.
• 11:06
  Come on peace, peace.