Latest / The Mami Collective / How Francesca Resigned From Being a Pharmacist, Beat Burnout & Built a Mom Life That Works
Transcript
- Paulina: Welcome to the Mommy Collective. I'm Paulina Rowe, radio host, TV contributor, writer, and mom of one. This is where ambitious moms come to keep their identity intact while navigating motherhood. Here we talk about the real stuff, career, money, relationships, identity, and... everything that gets messy in between. You won't find sugar coating or cliches. What you will find are unfiltered conversations, real resources, and proof that you don't have to lose yourself to be a good mom. The Mommy Collective is here to remind you, you can be ambitious, you can take up space, and you can thrive in motherhood and in everything else that makes you, you. Before we get into the episode, make sure you're following The Mommy Collective on Facebook, TikTok, and Instagram, and share this podcast with a mommy in your life who needs a inspiration or just a reminder that she's killing it. Also, don't forget to sign up for our newsletter and leave us a review so we can keep showing up and reach every ambitious mom out there doing big things. Let's get into it! All right, Mommy collected. are back another episode. I am so excited for my guest today. I have Francesca herself, or you may know her as Francesca's Nest on the Gram. How are you today? I'm good. How's it going? It's going. It's going good. It's going good. I can't complain. It's a new month. We're recording this in early February, so my favorite month. know. Isn't that crazy? It's like, how? Yeah. I feel like January kind of took forever, but now that it's gone, right? I'm like, huh. I was like, how are we still in January? then usually February goes fast. You live in the Midwest too, right? So like the winters just drag. And so we're just, getting closer to spring. I just keep thinking about that. Like we're almost there. Yes, no, a hundred percent. And you are also Midwest, right? Michigan. Yeah. So I'm in Michigan, but I'm at my parents. They snowbird. They're so lucky. So I'm in Florida. I leave tomorrow. Yeah, but it was, yeah, but I had to hear everyone here complain about how cold it is. And I was like, no, like. You guys don't understand. Michigan was like negatives, snow storms. Yup. So yeah. How nice though. I love it. Well, thanks for coming on and making the time. So I know that you are a mom of two, a four year old and a two year olds, which is a full-time job in itself. So that's a lot going on, but I love it. And your page is always so fun and active and you're very transparent about your like journey of you know when it comes to wellness, mental health. You shared also with me too that you are now full you were a pharmacist so you're a full-time corporate baddie working mom. Yeah. And we transitioned to full-time. I love it. Terrifying, scary but it's been seven months now and it was it's been by far the best decision. So I love that. was scary. What? kind of pushed you to make that jump. Cause I know a lot of times we go back and forth, you know? Yeah. So I know it's hard for people to understand that content creation is a job and how much work it takes. It's not hard work, but it's so time consuming. And what was happening was I wake up really early anyways to exercise, but I was like waking up even extra early to record content, record content edit. Cause I was working with brands and after a certain point it just became there was no way I could keep doing it anymore. So after like discussions with my husband and my family ended up being like, what is best for our family at this time? And I'll always have my pharmacist degree. I did a residency training. So, you know, I have, worked as a pharmacist for over six years. And if I want to go back, then I can, but right now the flexibility of being able to do content creation full time is just what feels right for my family. But it was a very... very, very scary decision. I had put in my two week notice and my whole body was in like full blown hives. And I was very like felt sick over the decision. But then like after I got used to it and everything, it's I am so grateful that I had the courage to do that. So that's incredible. You really bet on yourself with that one. And I love it. Yeah. But you said it too. I always have my degree to fall back on or like the job right of being a pharmacist. You're like, can go back to that. And I love it. Yeah. But I feel like that also kind of had a plain influence on the content that you've created. Yeah. So when I, would say like my first reels that were really getting traction were my working mom vlogs and then also like my exercise vlogs too. So it was like both. And I really loved sharing both because I felt like there wasn't enough like working moms out there. saying that you can balance it all. It's not perfect, but like you can still take care of yourself. And things were good. Like I was able to balance waking up early, feeding myself and my family healthy meals, all of that. was adding the content creation part on top of it. I was working two full-time jobs. So then it wasn't able, it wasn't feasible anymore. I couldn't live that way. But I just really wanted to share, yeah, the working mom aspect and the wellness aspect and my struggles with mental health and all of that. So. So yeah, that's how everything kind of started up. I love it. It honestly is the like you are the definition of mommy collective. Cause when I created this space, was like, I want to create a space for, I mean, it definitely has expanded, but like when I started, I was like, well, I'm a working mom and like, please don't like, don't hate me. I went back to work after six weeks. I kind of chose that. I get it. I mentally was like, I love. this little life in my home and this is wonderful. But I also knew it was best for me. So I'm a big advocate for that. was like, totally get it. I was ready in a way. And plus, I mean, I'm not sure if you guys have the same thing where it's like being a pharmacist, if it's like certain hours or certain days, like mine wasn't a typical nine to five. So yeah, what? Yeah, I can handle it. You feel me? I was like, can kind of share it. So that's kind of what I did. But I created this space because I was like, well, what happens in motherhood? And this is before I became a mom. I've seen friends, family, strangers online. I've seen the loss of identity, right? And that to me, that means more than just like my identity of like, oh, you know, I'm not wearing this like hot dress anymore. It's like, but about that, it's like so much more complex. Sure. I was like, people aren't just, we're not the same when we come become mothers. This isn't true. Right. So I was like, how do we kind of keep parts of ourselves or maybe they're not even the same us, but how do we nurture us financially, right? With wellness, health, all of it. Yeah, and I think I loved, and I still consider myself a working mom, because I put in the same, if not more hours than my corporate job. I have a management company and everything. like, I loved and was so proud to be a working mom. And if it wasn't for social media, I wouldn't have left. And I think that's kind of like, that was one of the harder parts about leaving was like, was the identity part, because I... and still very goal oriented and career focused and right, very driven, but it's not in a traditional sense anymore. And I was like the same as you, like I could not, was like, yes, can't wait to go back to work. Like this is a huge part of my identity. And so yeah, I can totally relate to that. I can totally relate. I love it. And no, when I found your page and everything, I was like, I have to talk to her because I feel like she gets it. So that made me really happy that you were able to come on and do that. So. I kind of want to dive into the wellness part of who you are and like even just the content you made. think the other day you posted something about you posted. I was looking at your weight loss journey perhaps maybe but your treadmill in the gym in the garage. Yeah. I was like what was that my house because I have one in my garage. Ask me how many times I've used it literally once. And with that being said I'm like well how does like Francesca or how do other moms really get the motivation and also just get the I don't know the willpower to Prioritize this because I'm gonna be full transparent and I've accepted it. I'm working on it So there are moves being made but like I'm not really like happy in my body I mean, I know all moms at one point hit that very common and you're very transparent about that, too So like for me, I'll use me as an example Like I have a weight loss goal right now It is 40 pounds, right? And I'm like, I know who I was even before baby like everything right as far as yeah body and I'm taking the steps way we're eating much healthier, just got blood work done. I am going back. tried it like once and I stopped because I couldn't do it, but I am going back on the monjaro. So I'm just getting a little head start. I need something like we need the help. So my question though is when it comes to like the wellness part of your journey, when did wellness sort of shift from being like, oh, this is nice to have and do to being like, I'm non-negotiable for you. Sure. So I've talked about it a little bit on my page, but my first daughter, my four year old was extremely colicky and she was like colicky where you could not sit still with her. Like she always, you had to always be moving. So I would put her in a carrier and I would bounce with her or we would walk and walk and walk. And I gained like over 70 pounds my first pregnancy and then gained 70 pounds my second one or a little less, but regardless a lot of weight. And so, and I was also really struggling with, after my first pregnancy. because I had a colicky baby. It was like my first experience and I was just like, why do people continue to have kids? Like she wasn't sleeping right. So, but I realized and I quickly realized that moving my body made me feel the best. So I had to like switch my mindset, right? Like I could be miserable that I have this child where I have to always be moving and bouncing and walking and walking and walking, or I could think of it as like, ⁓ okay, I get to move my body. I'm privileged. I'm grateful. Like I really had to switch my mindset. So that's when a lot of the wellness as a mom started. And then I was having like milk supply issues. So then I was doing a lot of research on what foods to eat. So I was really focused on my nutrition and my supply went up. Then I was also losing weight. And so I was like, okay, know, everyone's different, of course. But for me, I found what worked and it made me feel good. But ultimately, as my postpartum continued on, I wasn't able to manage it fully with. the diet and the exercise. So I did end up going on to like an SSRI for my postpartum anxiety, which was recommended by my doctor. But that's when I really used exercise and nutrition as a tool. It wasn't to like be a certain size or to lose weight. And so then I really learned to love it. And that continued on. Now it's been like four years. And for me, exercise helps me manage my anxiety, it helps me manage my moods and how I feel. And so even if I were to gain 20 pounds tomorrow, 30, 40 pounds, like I'm still gonna continue to exercise the way that I am because this is what makes me feel good mentally. We have to find a reason to take care of ourselves besides the way that we look as moms. Because you can, like you, it's, has to be, there has to be more of a reason because, The way we look isn't everything. mean, it's just like it's such a small part of us, right? So if you're only doing it for the outside reasons, you're going to burn out so quickly. So I talk a lot on my page of like, I will just walk and watch TV show or do things that I can't do when my kids are around because like, they always want to watch their TV or they need me. And so I've learned to like, really appreciate that time alone. And so For me, it's really early in the morning. Some people it's late at night. Some people it's on their lunch break, whatever. But I love to like, yeah, sit my hot coffee, watch a good TV show, respond to text messages, edit, whatever I can do. And so I look forward to it, but you have to find your purpose beyond how much you weigh or fitting into a certain gene size. I think it's so valid. And you kind of even helped me reframe a little bit of my thinking just based on that. No, that's like very, very, very true. And then what about for you, like, I'm curious, what does like a random, like, I know you post most of this on social media, but I would love to see what's like the random Tuesday wellness day at your house. What does that look like in terms of eating, working out? Like, how does sort of manage all that? Yeah. So I wake up really early. I wake up at four thirty ish and I'm either walking on my treadmill or I'm going to the gym. I do have a gym in my house. I did a really wonderful collaboration. I have all the equipment at my house, but I need to get out of the house, especially now that I'm home and I'm not working out of the home to see my trainer, socialize with other moms. There's other moms that are there with me. so that, again, a reason outside of the way that I look, I want to go socialize. It makes me a better mom. or yeah, or I'm walking early in the morning. And then throughout the day, I'm focused on eating high protein. So each meal has to be balanced, and I mean balanced, like has to have some sort of protein, some sort of fat, some carbs, right? But it needs to be whole foods, things that will give me energy to push through the day because you know how exhausting it is with kids. So again, I look at food as not just to make me look a certain way, but how is it gonna give me energy to like chase after my kids and sometimes have the patience to deal with them instead of being hangry, crashing, binging, so. That's how I look at anything wellness related throughout the day. You've mentioned anxiety and I'm curious, like what did it look like for you and like what kind of help you recognize? Like that's what it was. Yeah, so. At first it was like not really wanting to be around people, which is not like me. Like I didn't really want like me and my baby at the time around people. I was getting worried about things that I never really worried about before. Like my. getting sick, like overly. I wanted to really just be alone and I'm not an introvert. But then as it went on, what was happening was I would feel very panicky, like at a supermarket with my child in line at a grocery store, in line at like I remember in Sephora. I had this like irrational fear that something was gonna happen to me. I was gonna pass out or something and then my child was gonna be alone or I was breastfeeding and I pumped for a very long time and I had this fear of like, what if I get in this car accident and then my child doesn't have milk? Like these irrational, this was on my way to my hospital shifts, just these irrational fears and it was a lot of panic and a lot of anxiety. I wasn't like laying around and I wasn't like, no one would ever know anything was wrong. Let's put it that way. But then it just started to not get better. And I would say at about the year mark, My doctor, like my blood pressure was high. I was anxious. She was just like, is everything okay? And then that's when I just shared everything with her. And she's like, let's try an SSRI, anti-anxiety medication, antidepressant, and started a really low dose. And it changed everything. I always say though, it just takes the edge off. I think a lot of people are worried that anti-anxiety medication, antidepressants are going to change you. They don't. They just take the edge off so you can think. more rationally. So do I sometimes still get those panicky sensed feelings? Yes, but I can change it. I can switch it off. It doesn't control my life anymore. I can still take my daughters to the grocery store. I can still live my life. And I lived like that for a long time, for almost a year. And I'm really grateful that I had the courage just to be like, I don't want to live like this anymore. Because you don't realize like how good it can be. Yes, if you do something about it and some people are like well you could just like people will say like ⁓ diet and exercise can help well only so much right like There was only so much That we can do but if there is some sort of like chemical imbalance then there's nothing wrong with needing help 100 % agree. Thank you for sharing that first of all. Yeah, also like that is that is so true I've been going back and forth with that too because I do feel like I have my anxiety has just been bad since I can remember And so I'm like, am I anxious or am I just this or that? And then I also have ADDs, that's not great. So I'm like, oh, you know what I mean? Like the way my brain works. Yeah. Yeah. I think if it's interfering with your daily life and it's interfering with you being a mother, I don't think there's anything wrong with even just having like conversations with your doctor. They're not going to say like, you need to start this. Right. And I know some moms are scared that like maybe they'll be like admitted into like maybe some sort of hospice. No, it's more just. Opening that door and to having that conversation and finding a doctor who you feel comfortable with to 100 % I'll thank you for like sharing your story and again for breaking the stigma around that because that is so important especially like you said for Mothers we're already like there's a yeah one out in our brains anxiety Depression everything creeps on. Yeah, and Pete there's so many and so when moms are saying oh my gosh like I didn't know other people felt the same way. want to be like, if only I could show you my DMs, flooded hundreds of moms saying they have felt or feel the same way. And some have found other ways to take care of it. And some are still trying to figure it out. So it's like, I know, and I'm so confident in talking about it now because I see like so many other people feel the same exact way. And there's nothing to be ashamed of. Like there's nothing to be ashamed of. There's only, I always say the people that judge are the ones that should be ashamed. If you're gonna, someone's gonna judge you for wanting to take care of yourself, that's a them problem that I always say has nothing to do with you. I 100 % agree. 100! Because I always say that too, like if you have something going on, whether it's like with your body, right? Or let's just say, I don't know. I have a headache, like I'm gonna pop a Tylenol. That's just what I'm gonna do, right? And I know not the same thing, I'm very aware, but I'm also like, well, what's going to help me in this situation? And I think too, like with doctors, like there are doctors for, your pharmacists, you absolutely know firsthand, they will adjust the meds if there's something not right. You know what I mean? Like that'll be handled. Exactly. I think that's so important. Thank you for sharing that. Sorry, I'm an advocate for anything mental health, so I'm just like, yes. Me too. If I could scream it from the rooftop at all times. I would, you and I think when I first meet like a postpartum mom or if there's a postpartum mom that I'm like, or like a mom that I'm friends with, who's there, especially their first child, I'm just like, are you okay? Like, are you really okay? Like you can tell me, tell anybody. Like I'm more so like if I go visit them, I like don't really care to hold the baby. I'm just like, so how are you? Like honestly, tell me how you're doing, you know? And then they'll open up and then I'm always open to tell people like, you know, my story as well. So. 100%. Oh, I love it. So you mentioned like, you're like, hear from women in my DMs and people will comment and they relate to a lot of the stories that you share and things that you post. What do you feel like has been, if you can recall, one of your most memorable messages or connections with someone just based on something you posted or shared? ⁓ I don't know. I think it's more mostly just I get these DMs from women just saying, I've been following you. Like Mike, I've had my account for like a year and a few months and they're just like, I've been following you for a year now or maybe six months. And you've really taught me how to enjoy movement, how to enjoy eating healthy, and that it doesn't have to be perfect. And really, I've noticed such a difference in my relationship with my husband, my kids. I'm just happier. I don't dread taking care of myself. So that really makes me feel good because when I hear moms, especially when you're a mom, you do not know how to take care of yourself. You do not know how to balance it at all. I didn't at all. I think it's important to watch other women give like a realistic idea of, I mean, you don't have to do everything that I do, but that it's okay to take care of yourself. It's okay. 100%. You need to or else you're going to be so resemble towards everyone around you. And this just doesn't help anybody. So I feel like your advice also gives an end, please, you know, whoever's listening to like take what you like and leave what you don't. But I feel like your advice is, really, really resonating with our audience because majority are moms and also I just feel like you are giving them almost a recipe to enjoy motherhood and I think a lot of times I don't know if you don't mind sharing how like your if you can remember how you were raised with like your mom or your grandma I look back at my mom and I'm like yeah I feel like guilt sometimes but I'm like I feel like I have a different motherhood experience for a couple of reasons but I think one of them being like I actually took I'm taking care of myself like yes yeah I prioritize myself And my child, of course, number one, hello. But I also matter. Yeah. You know? Yeah. So my mom, she was or she still is like a stay at home mom. And she put everything into us. She always ate healthy and she exercised and stuff. But it was always like it was just always about us. And I think it's just different, though. Like, I think I don't know if I feel like if I didn't have social media, I would feel really guilty about taking care of myself. I think. Yes. Life is a lot different because I see other moms take care of themselves and I'm like, oh, see, I should too. But so my mom just poured everything into us and I'm so grateful for that. Like sometimes it makes like, I'm just like, how did you do it all? Right. So especially when I was working full time, was like, oh my, we were so, we're so different, but. Oh yeah. You know, but she's so proud that I take care of myself and she's always so, so, so supportive of that. But I just think it was different then. I, talk. They didn't, we're not talking about mental health back then. I mean, it's very different now. it. No, and now obviously, you said we have social media, so it's like so much easier to like, just like talk about your views and obviously share like tips and tricks, advice, anything like having a good day, having a bad day. Yeah. But you're right, like our parents didn't. Sometimes I'm really curious if our moms were around like for social media in this era, I wonder how they would have navigated it. I'm so curious all the time. Well, that's why I'm interested to see what we're going to be like when we're our parents age and what our kids are going to be like having social media. there's a lot of great aspects of social media. Absolutely. It makes us, it makes me feel a lot less alone, but there's also a negative side. So it's just like, what is the future? What's the future going to be? a hundred percent. So speaking of social media, I definitely want to kind of dive into your like, You're just your craft essentially, but also I love that you were a corporate baddie mom, right? Pharmacy turned full-time content creator. So I definitely to know. mean, we kind of figured out what the leap looked like because I definitely can't picture that being easy. And you were mentioning that earlier. was so scary. I know. I'm sure there's no way because I loved my job. Like, OK, I loved my job. I was not miserable. Loved my manager. She's listening to this. Liz, I love you. Like that was so because I had a wonderful partner. I worked in a team. And yeah, we're for a wonderful company. Like nothing was wrong to leave that. was like, what am I doing? But I knew that I had to. ⁓ again, it's been such an amazing decision. yeah, I'm so proud of you. No, it's not easy. It's not easy. What do you feel like if you were to share? Like what are the toughest parts do you feel of full time content creating for you personally? What do you find? Yeah, sometimes. Number one would definitely be you never get to turn it off. So I'm always thinking content ideas and I'm like constantly jotting them in my phone. I never can. You have to like this is my job now. So it's like I'm always thinking of ideas. Things will click in my head and but so what makes that hard is you also need to be present with your kids and it's really hard when it's a it's really is a 24 seven job. Once your account starts making money and I work with brands right there's like the like the more like organic content. And then there's like the branded content, right? And so it's like trying to find a good mix of that and making sure you're only working with brands that you really align with. It's just, but it's constant. It's constant. So one would be not being able to shut it off. Two, at the beginning, especially once you get like those viral videos, the hate. I mean, the hate. on so many aspects of your life because I vlog and I share a lot ⁓ of my life I also don't share a lot. What are we rooting about though when it comes to taking care of ourselves? ⁓ gosh, well okay, so when I was a full-time working mom, I got a lot of hate about my kids having childcare. So much hate, I cannot, but I was so proud. Those didn't even bother me, but they would just say horrible, horrible things. That's awful. I'm sorry. no. ⁓ yeah. bet you their other moms majority, which kills me. I'm like, ladies. Well, but ⁓ yeah, I other women. But then I left my corporate job and then got so much hate from corporate moms about like you. Then that's when I was like, ⁓ like, I'll never be able to win. I also got a lot of hate of just saying my life isn't realistic. You know, whatever, like just and then or like, you know, well, your husband helps you so much. OK, well, yeah, like. Well, I'm married, no matter how. Yeah, like, or mom, this one, got, not one time I got it. A lot of times, like someone's saying, like, yeah, I would love to see what it's like if you were a single mom. And so like, I had one of my followers be like, yeah, Frank, just could just divorce your husband so everyone can see what it's like, you know, it's constantly like a lot of comments are, well, if your life was like A, B, and D, yeah, it wouldn't be like that, you know, and it's always like projecting their life onto mine. Yeah. But at the beginning, It was hard. mean, when you're reading just hate, hate, hate, hate, hate comments. It's part of the game, though. Like now I'm so used to it, it doesn't affect me anymore. But yeah, and then also number three would be like, you're going through any sort of big life change. You feel like hundreds of thousands of people are watching you. leaving my corporate job, I waited about a couple weeks to announce it because I was going through a lot. it was a like mentally I was just and then you get hate comments about it. It's like, it was, it's part of the game though. So that is by far, have to have, you have to have thick skin when it comes to, and I'm sure you probably feel the same way. Like you have to, it is not worth it. If you cannot stay mentally sane by reading the most hateful, mean things about, like it's not worth it. So it became, it got to a point where it was like, okay, I'm either going to continue doing this or like we're done. I can't live like this. not. Yeah, no, I a hundred percent get that. Like you said, you can never win, which you actually just gave me, speaking of content, you gave me a content idea. I'm like gonna take my pen and write it down about a video I make. You never can win. And I've learned that being a mom, was like, whoa, even before that, was like, as a woman, you can never win. And I'm like, now as a mom, no matter what I do, I can join the fucking circus tomorrow. I'm still not gonna, like, nothing, nothing can win. I'm gonna have 200 kids tomorrow. Like nothing, nothing's good enough for anybody. Comment about everything. How many kids do you have? Where do they go to school? Are you working? Are you not working? Like you bounce back? Like, you know, did you lose the weight? Yes, yes, three thing. I'm like, oh my God. So you're right. You have to have thick skin. And I learned that in radio. I my first day on the air. I wanted to like crawl into a hole. was like, well, like you don't even know me. You don't even see me. You just hear me like this was wild. So you're correct about that. It is. It's like you have to be used. You have to be. Oh, yeah. Oh, I've heard it all too. It's I've heard it all. and literally everything. that's why I'm kind of like, all right, it is what it is. And it can actually be funny for a second. I thought the hate comments kind of stopped for like a hot minute and I got really concerned. I was like, ⁓ my God, like, did I fall off? Like, did I become fucking irrelevant? Well, that's the thing. It's like engage, at least in my like, you know, with my Instagram, like all engagement or like all comments are engagement. So whether they're positive or they're The thing, unfortunately, is like a lot of videos that get a lot of hate comments. blow up because they're getting a lot of engagement. So, you know, but you're like, well, I still want to be talked about. I'm like, I'm putting all this work in. Let's talk. Yeah. Yeah. Like give people something to talk about because I mean, but a lot of is, and then I would say number four, and I think a lot of us content creators feel this way and I see it talked about on social media and I talk about it with my other content friends. is you really see people's true colors in your real life. Like the people that are actually supportive. So when I first started, it's cringe, it's weird. And people would accidentally like text me things about myself, like talking about me. no, no. Yeah, yeah. And I was like, okay. And then I would hear, you know, people talking about me, people telling me people are talking about me. And so that also came a point of do I wanna keep doing this? Like this? It really shows you who's supportive and who isn't. And I remember those people that were very supportive of me from the beginning. People that liked, commented from the get-go. I will support them. Like a couple of them have started their own pages. I'm liking and commenting on every single post because I will never forget the people that were there for me and the people that just completely... didn't want anything to do with it. Thought it was cringe, embarrassing. yeah. That's awful. I'm sorry if those people are supposed to be your friends, your village, your support. I'm like, that's awful. So no, I definitely love that you are a girl's girl and you're giving that love back now, especially that, you know, your page is huge and you've really grown in your again, like not only motivating other moms, but I'm sure other people too, that you probably didn't even know it could be just random. I'm so nester or somebody. Yeah. And I love that. like, don't even have kids anymore. I just love your energy. I'm like, thanks. That's actually the nicest compliment. as a creator, you don't even really know why people are following you. Right? For me, it's just my basic, boring life. So when people are asking, ⁓ what's work? I don't know. I'm just being myself. Like, I don't know what's resonating with people. I just share my authentic life. And so I think, I don't know. I don't know if you feel the same way when it comes to your job, too. 100 % my biggest thing is and like I'm also like at work we can be I'm on a show and we are all very Self-deprecating people like for the most part it works in our favor. It's great. But sometimes we're like, you know, sometimes I'm like, do I really feel that way? you know, I like I'll like make them Yeah, I always say to you cannot even hate on me because I whatever you're gonna say I've already said about myself like I true Not get me so like yeah, my thing is like I always ask why do people care like why do you? Like what I'm saying right now, like, I mean, I'm so grateful you care, but I'm like, yeah, like I'm lame right now. Like, why do you care? But then I think about it. It's like, you know, in radio and even I think content creation and radio are both the same. It's like you've built this journey with your followers and listeners. they, and I promise you, I'm sure you remember people will message you like. I remember when you first got pregnant, know, with, like, they'll say things and you're like, holy crap, like, you've been on this ride. So, like, people do care and they're invested. And I love responding to people like you said and interacting with other people because I love that. I love it. It's like, I'm a connection. Like, I can't see you physically, you're not next to me, but, like, we're connected. And I think that's what's been hard about, like, my page growing is I'm trying to keep up with the DMs and trying to still create that connection. But I don't know if your DMs are the same. There's three different sections and sometimes the DMs get lost. And so it's like, I'm not trying to, I'm not ignoring you. I'm going through, reading, I'm spending so much time on my DMs every week. But sometimes they just get lost and it's just like, hurts because I don't want people to not feel connected when they reach out to me because people are taking time out of their day to DM you and they're taking time out of their day to comment. But it's hard because there's only one of me. And, you know, so if I could just clone myself and I'm sure you probably feel the same way every day. I want to clone myself all the time. I'm like, you know, because I want to like I want to I want me to do certain things, you know, so that's that's another problem. Yes. Let me get out there. So speaking of that, actually, I'm always very curious as a mom, you know, former corporate baddie working mom, but also very much still like working, putting in the work for your social, which, like you said, is, know, tips and tricks can you share that are That kind of help you get by day by day. Like, where do you outsource if you do? What does Francesca like when you ask for help, which I hope you are because moms need help. I'm an advocate for that too. What does your system look like? Yeah. So. just really like when I first start out the day I write, I bought this like notepad, it's like $5 off Amazon, it's like my daily tasks. Of course I have like a calendar for the month, but it's like one of the first things I do after I wake up before I hop on my treadmill or go to the gym is I write down my daily tasks. It can be as simple as drinking enough water. It doesn't have to be like amount of balances, but if I write it down, there's more of a chance of it happening for me. So I try and jot down like maybe five or six things, the main things, right? And okay, so after that I have child, so this was something that I struggled with was Once I left my corporate job, so I had full-time childcare, obviously, at the time. Then I felt like, why do I need full-time childcare when I'm just doing content creation? Well, I burnt myself out, and it wasn't fair to my kids, because then wasn't fully present. All throughout the day, I'm trying to get all this work done. So now I have childcare, I would say, a couple days a week for a few hours, and that's just so I can fully do my work. What happens though is early in the morning, If I'm on my treadmill, a lot of the time I'm doing a lot of content editing. So that's why like to wake up early until like pretty much my kids are about to wake up and then school. I kind of love it because you're like getting your steps in, but you're also getting work done. it. Okay. So like that makes me feel good. Like I'm getting my movement in for the day, but I'm also editing, doing everything that I need to do. And then I'm always after like my husband will get back from work, whatever dinner, any free time I can get my husband. Again, it's a job, this is bringing an income, so he'll like watch the kids so I can get time to edit, do whatever. It definitely, you have to plan and you have to organize. When it comes to content, you want to ideally post, especially at the beginning every single day, or at least six days a week, five, six days a week. That takes planning. So you really need to find what works, what's efficient for you. You and I talked about this at the beginning, it takes a lot of time to edit a reel, but it gets fast, it gets faster. And so yeah, so that's more of like the organic content that I make, right? Like my fun stuff. But with brands, that's a whole other thing. So I work with a management company. So I had to outsource a lot of my emails, all of that. got to a point where I couldn't, my inbox, I get a lot of questions. How did I know when it was time to work with a management company? My inbox was very busy and I was bringing in a certain amount of income from brand deals. And so I signed on with like my dream. management agency, I signed with them last, it's almost been a year, it'll be a year in April. Yeah, thanks. And so I have a manager, she's amazing. And she helps me stay on track when it comes to brands. So I get a lot of questions on what do management companies do? They don't create content for me, nothing like that. They are the middle person between me and the brands, right? They have lawyers involved, they deal with the finance part, making sure I get paid, making sure that we're all in agreement of what the brand needs from me. And so it's like, just feel safer having that middle person. And it's, I always say it's a lot of back and forth. It's not like, hey, make a video for me. And then it's done. It's, you have to write out a concept. What are you going to film? Then they have to approve. Then you have to put in draft. You have to submit a draft and editing. And it's just, it's a lot of back and forth. So, so I've outsourced having a management company. You do give a certain amount of your pay and that's okay. But I need to outsource more. need an assistant. It's really hard for me because I like the way that I do things. And so this is my baby. This is my business. And it's really hard to. Yeah, we got to clone ourselves. We have to ourselves. And I think people don't understand how much it's running a business. Like I have finances that I have to be in line. I pay taxes. I have a lot of like admin like administrative stuff that needs to get done. And that It's time consuming. And so I do, need an assistant. I just have to trust that I can find the right person, but it'll take some time. ⁓ yeah. No, you will. You will. It'll take a minute, but the right person will come along. So for somebody who's also creating content and let's say someone's listening who maybe like is getting a couple of brand deals here and there, like they're starting to their toe. Can you explain why, and this is really for any content creator, why it's so important to create that organic content if it is? ⁓ yeah. Absolutely. So I always say you need to be authentically you. Like people are going to resonate with you and who you are as a person. Okay. And brands want to see a certain amount of engagement, which means people liking reposting, engaging with your content. So it's important for you to get out as much organic content as you can. Let the world, let people know who you are, what you care about. Because why would a brand want to pay you to represent them? You have to share who you are. That has to be number one. I think that is something that a lot of people are like, well, I want to start an Instagram page or social media because I want to make money. And truly that was not on my radar at the time because it shouldn't be at the beginning because it's going to take time. main priority should be how am I going to connect with an audience? How am I going to, yeah, just connect with people? And I always say you have to be yourself because if you are going to show up, and I'm sure you probably feel the same way at work every single day, show up as someone that's not you, that is so exhausting and draining. yes, it's scary to be yourself because you think, who's going even like me? I know how that feels. But if you try to be anything else, like it's so exhausting. That also goes into the part of people ask, like, well, how do I know what content to make? It has to be something that you'll never get sick of posting, that you can continuously think of content ideas. So probably for you, being a mom, being a working mom, that was me. I love being a working mom, I love wellness. it's an endless amount of content you can post on that. And you just show up as yourself. And another thing is people get so fixated on follower count. Even if 100 people are following you, that's amazing. I was so excited for 100 followers. To me, I still feel like I'm posting for 100 people because it doesn't matter. at the end of the day, it doesn't matter. And then with the whole pay aspect too, I get asked a lot, how many followers do I need to start making money? I know people with less followers than me that make more money than me. And I make more money than people with a lot more followers than me. It doesn't matter. If you want to make money, you have to really build a connection with your audience. Yeah. 100. So that they trust you and they trust what they're going to purchase from you or the brands are going to trust if they're going to give you however much money that it's going to convert into sales. So it's a balancing act. It's a balancing act. And I always want to, I always want to give people like an easy answer, but I don't. No, totally. I just always felt like even if you do reach a point where you are doing brand deals, I always feel like it's still important to show and you do a great job. That's why I wanted to ask. Show still like the organic Francesca's, this is your day in the life or maybe, I don't know, your toddler had a meltdown, but you still got your workout and whatever it was, you're still showing it. I think it's important. And I think people understand, I hope a lot of followers understand, There's no way I could do this for free. I'm putting in so many hours. Like there's just no, as much as I love it and I love my, it is so much work. It takes away from my family. Like I could not do this for free. So I think of it as like mini commercials. Like I'll throw in like a brand that I really love, but I'm still going to give you that content while you're still here. Sometimes I'm posting twice a day. There was times where I was posting three times just to make sure that, okay, I had this brand deal, but like, I know what you're following me. Let me give you why you're actually following me. But it just, takes more work, but. I mean, everyone has to do what works for them. So 100 percent. And really quick, I'm just curious for the behind the scenes part. What do you use or how do you film those behind the scene moments like I were using like a tripod, the little sticky guy that goes on the wall? I mean, this is like really specific. Yeah. We still carry for like vlogs or for brand deals. Like what do you do? Like you have somebody follow you with a camera. Like is that easy? I wonder. I wish I write my dream. So like I love to vlog when like my like no one's awake. That's why I love doing my early morning one. So now I do like part of my morning when they're awake and sometimes my afternoon, but a tripod. All you need is a tripod. If you are okay with like purchasing like a little mini ring light, can attach your phone onto the tripod, right? That's all you need. That's all I had at the beginning was a tripod. And then as you like start growing and like I have a tripod now on every floor of my house, I have a ring light on every floor. It's just always- Moving around ring lights and all that stuff is a pain. No, it's too much, but- You really, if you want to vlog, you learn what angles, you learn kind of like where I should put the camera. Sometimes you accidentally don't press record, you know. It's not perfect, it's not perfect. It's time consuming, vlogging's very time consuming, but I love it. I think it's a great way to connect with your audience. When it comes to brand deals and stuff, I have like a bigger ring light. It's kind of like more of a production, right? Because brands, people forget brands have criteria that they want, so. You got to give it your best. Yes, you do. So very true. I love it. Well, thank you for dropping all these gems. I appreciate it. No, I mean, this was so great. And again, mental health, wellness, prioritize yourselves, moms. And you're thinking about content creation like it is a full time job. So don't let anybody tell you otherwise. Yes, it is fun. Oh, my God. No, I love this. Thank you for coming on today. My last and final question for you is sure. Finish a sentence for me. And I think you're the perfect person to ask this, okay? A good mom is finish the sentence. One that takes care of herself. I love it. I love it. That was perfect. Francesca, where can we follow you on the gram or if anybody wants to like Dan you, keep up with you, where can we do that? Yeah, Francesca's Nest. Francesca's Nest on Instagram. I'm mostly active. I'm also on TikTok. So yeah, follow along. Beautiful Francesca, thank you so much for coming on. We definitely want to have you back so you're the bad. Anytime I would love that. So thank you.