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Reclaiming Sovereignty over Your Finances · Cash Confident with Brie Sodano

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Cash Confident podcast.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: I'm Brie Sedano, your fearless host, personal finance expert and the visionary behind the revolutionary Cash Confident community.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Get ready to embark on an electrifying journey where we redefine the rules of money and empower women to harness the immense power to craft the life they truly, truly desire.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: This podcast is the ultimate resource, meticulously crafted, for women who are ready to unleash their financial prowess and embrace a life of abundant success.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: We leave no stone unturned as we delve into the depths of money management, mindset mastery and the undeniable influence of emotions on your financial decisions.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: Prepare to rise above the societal limitations and break free from the chains that have held you back, as we equip you with the tools and knowledge to make bold, confident choices with your cash.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: We believe that true financial power begins with knowledge, and that is exactly what we deliver.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: So buckle up, my fierce and ambitious friends, as we embark on this transformative journey to becoming Cash Confident together.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, hello, hello.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Today we are talking about power and money and how to have more power in your relationship with money, and I love this topic because this is essentially the essence of what I do.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: And when I'm talking about power here, I'm talking about the power to live your life the way that you want to live it and really use money as a tool to help you to do that and not have money as a limiting factor or a thing that you're constantly waiting on.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: So we're going to start our discussion today with some ways that I notice from working with people that they give their power away to money, that they essentially limit themselves and their power in their relationship with money, and how to start to call that back and really have that power to do the things that you want with All right.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: So one of the first ways that I see people give their power away to money is to set money as its own goal.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Now, where I'm not talking about is financial goals.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: Having financial goals makes sense.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: That's the thing that we want to do, but we'll call it chasing money.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: When money is the goal instead of the service or instead of doing the thing that you want, we end up giving a lot of power away to money and really what it can end up costing is living a whole lifetime doing something that we don't want to do.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: So, for example, actually I want to break a pretty common limiting belief here.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: So people come to talk to me all the time and they're going to go to school to do one thing or another.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: And when I'm like, wow, and it sounds like I don't actually want to do that at all, what's going on here?
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: They'll be like, oh well, there's a lot of money to make in this field and I'm like that's interesting.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of money to make doing whatever.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Doing whatever it is that you want to do, and money's not a guarantee down any road.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: I've worked with lawyers who are starving, living at their parents' house, not able to pay their student loans, and I've worked with lawyers making millions of dollars.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: And I've worked with social workers making $24,000 a year in the middle of the night at certain kinds of clinics, and I've worked with social workers making millions of dollars in their own practices.
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: So it's like and if I was to say that about any profession, there are chefs that are making barely able to meet their world famous chefs making tons of money.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: And so every single profession that there is any way that you could do your work.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: There is both a way to do that work and make a ton of money, and there is both a way to do that work where you make hardly any money.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: And so, when it comes to the power to make the decision, that's one of the biggest ways people give their power away, and it's a costly decision to the quality of your life, right?
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Even if you make a lot of money, even if you're very financially successful, if you spend eight hours a day doing something you don't want to do, or you were pining to do something different, like what did you win?
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: Like what did you win?
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: So I want you to understand that one of the ways that you can start to pull your power back from money is to ask yourself like what's the truth of how I, what do I want to do for my work in the world?
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: What do I want to give?
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: Where is it?
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: And I'm talking about, like the wealth that's inside of you.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: What's the wealth?
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: You know, what's the way that I make the world a better place and what feels good for me to do.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: And that's a place that you probably want to be spending your efforts, because that's the place where stuff is easy and fun and like there's a saying.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: It's like well, if you do something you love, you work.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: You never work a day in your life, right?
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: And so that's a place where, when you have a power over your money, when you have the power to say I'm going to do the thing that I want to do and the money is going to follow, then that's cool.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: So that's one way.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: Another place that people give a lot of power to money is in their emotions, where people do a very big emotional roller coaster, like when their money, when, like, they get their paycheck, or when, you know, a client comes in or a customer comes in and they have the money, they feel really good and really excited and really grateful and yes, yes, yes.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: But when the money starts to wane, when the money starts to go out or is that wax, I don't know when the money starts to flow out, right, like then they get tight in a little.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: They get tight and crazy and in scarcity, right.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: And so when our money dictates our feelings, that's another really big place where people give power away to money, and this one is a little bit more difficult to do, because we're human beings and we have feelings and all of that is real and true.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: But one of the best things I ever did for my business was to separate my emotions from my money.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: So when my money is good, of course I'm grateful and I'm appreciative and I love it and I will lean into those extra good feelings.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: But when my money is low, I used to really like get really low.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I used to question myself.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: My self-worth would go down, I would get really weird in the way that I offered or the way that I sold and that was so expensive, because my lows would get lower, because I was acting different, right.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: And so I started to learn to separate my money from my emotions.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: And so when I feel really good about my money, I'm like yes, but also when my money is low and the money is flowing out, I'm also like yes, like I'm so grateful for what I'm ever I'm getting, for that I'm spending the money on, or I'm just trusting, like I'm starting to learn to feel into the trust of knowing that more money is coming my way.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: And so separate like you.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: Basically, where I'm going with this is you're allowed to feel abundant, you're allowed to feel grateful, you're allowed to feel appreciative of money, even when your money is low, and that's more that you can do that, the more authority you're going to have in your own relationship and it really changes your point of attraction.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: It really changes the way that the world will interact with you around money.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: But it's that emotional roller coaster, especially if you have a business.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: This is especially, especially, especially true if you have a business that emotional roller coaster that goes up and down with your revenue or up and down, you know, with your profitability, that is so exhausting.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: So that's another place that I see people give a lot of power over money, and that's a place to start to be able to pull it back.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: And you do that by starting to just decide that you, you get to feel good about money when the money's there or when it's not there, when it's flowing in or when it's flowing out.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: You get to feel good about it either way.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: The same way, you get to feel good about your spouse, even when they're away at work, because you trust that they're coming home Right.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: So that's that's another thing, all right.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: So a third place that I see people really give a lot of power to their money is waiting on decisions, waiting, waiting until the money is right to make a decision, and the reason that this is such a problem is because the money will never be right.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: Money, money does what money responds to you.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: So if you're waiting for the money, the money is also waiting for you and people will wait literal decades, literal decades to go on vacations, literal decades to upgrade their house.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: Like literal decades I'm not even exaggerating because I talk to people all the time.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: So the thing about that is that we have a part of our brain called our reticular activating system and that part of our brain is programmed by our decisions.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: And that's when our attack, when you've made a decision about something, your reticular activating system starts to look for the ways to get it done, starts to look for the opportunity, starts to look for, like, the how is this going to happen?
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: So most of the time people don't make the decision because they don't have the money, but then our reticular activating system never gets programmed to look for the how, look for the opportunities, look for the ways to get it done.
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: So we have to start to pull that power back and say, all right, well, if I want to go on vacation, I'm going on vacation.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: I'm making the decision that I'm going on vacation and I'm going to book one aspect of the trip I'll book the hotels, I'll book the dates, I'll take the time off from work.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: I'll you know whatever step is most appropriate for you at that time and then from there it's like from there then the travel deals show up and then from there the opportunity show up, or from there you get offered.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: You know somebody's got a house in the area and you can stay at a super deep discount.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: Like a lot of times, it's the the decision needs to be made first.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: So when we're waiting for the money to be right and we're waiting until we have the extra money and we're waiting, waiting, waiting, we're giving a lot of our power, away from the quality of our life, to that money, and so it's an ineffective.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: It's an ineffective strategy.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: You know it's not super effective.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Very rarely does somebody say to me oh, I had so much extra money, I was able to do all of this because all of a sudden I had all this extra money, because it's just not the way that it is.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: It's a sentence that I don't think I've heard too many times and talking to thousands of people over the last 10 years about their money.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: So, and that's the same thing about investing, that's the same thing about saving, right.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: So sometimes it's about spending and going on trips or upgrades or whatever, but a lot of times it's even just the investments.
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: People be like, oh, I want to invest and I just never have any money to invest.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: I'm like, dude, you just got to get started.
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: Get started with 1%, get started with $10 a week, get started, get started with wherever you can get started, because once you take that action, once you do the thing, the money starts to respond and that's that's the magic sauce.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: So it's like if you want to be an investor, just open up the account and put whatever amount of money you can reasonably do and then next month look at it and say, all right, well, can I increase this a little bit?
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: Did this hurt real bad?
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: Can I make this $10 a week into $20 a week?
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: Or can I make this 1% into 1.5%?
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: And then from there you'll be surprised and there's so much good feeling, juiciness, watching your money stack and watching your account build up, like it's so satisfying.
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: It feels really good to do so anyways.
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: So that's another place where you can take some power back.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: All right, the fourth thing that I want to talk about is really around limitations, and this is really a mindset issue.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: So to really take this power back, you're going to have to work on your mindset quite a bit.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: But oftentimes people let money or the lack of money limit not even just what they do, but even what they want, right.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: So sometimes I'll talk to people and I'm like, well, what do you even want?
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: And I'll ask a question.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: I'll say, hey, well, if I had a magic wand and I could give you anything that you wanted from your financial situation, whatever you'd be working toward, what do you want?
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: And they will have no answer.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: They're so used to not even not.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: They're so used to the limitations that even in a, even in a question that's, I'm like I have a literal magic wand in this question I could give you anything that you want.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: And they don't even have a desire.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: They don't.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: They're so limited, they're thinking has gotten so small, based on the scarcity, and so some of the I'll give you a couple of tips to start to get around limited thinking.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: But if that's coming up for you, if you like, if you say I can't even imagine this being easy, I can't even imagine having enough money, I can't even imagine, that's a really good indication that you have a lot of limits to your thinking and that your mental landscape is really small for you.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: And so one of the things that I like to do is I like to ask questions that, from the perspective of the question, it already puts me on the other side of the limitation.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: So here's an example A lot of times people don't want what they want because they don't want to be greedy.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: Right, they're unwilling to be greedy.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: And so I'll ask the question Well, if you were a greedy person, what would you want?
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: If you were a careless person?
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: What would you want If you were a selfish person?
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: What would you want If you were?
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: I don't know if you work or dashy and what would you want?
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: And it starts to just put you on the other side, right?
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: So if you're unwilling to be greedy, if you go to the side, you know, if you move your perspective in your mind to the place where you're already greedy, what would you want?
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: Or if you were already selfish, what would you want?
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: And it, so it shifts that perception, and so that's a place that you can start to find your desires.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: But a lot of times people don't even know what they want.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: They're not going after what they want.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: You know it's, it's all limitations, and either it's often based on the lack of money.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: So they're like all I can, I don't even want to go To Europe because I can only afford to go to Cape Cod and it's like, well, all right, but If, if you can't even entangle with that desire, if you can't even imagine that your reticular Activating systems definitely not gonna be looking for it, like, you're definitely not gonna get there.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: So limitations in your thinking is another place where where that reality Right, like the reality of what is you know is always open to change, like life's change in an instant.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: That's why we buy life insurance or a lot of tickets like, like you know, life can change really, really quickly.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: But it's like, if you won't even let yourself have the thoughts, if you won't know, know that mental limitation around your money, then then there's nothing for you to get because you don't even want it.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: Which makes takes me to my last point around really desire and having the truth of what you want, and a lot of times we got in trouble for wanting too many things when we were kids.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: Right, people be like oh, you know, I'm not buying that for you and stop asking.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: A lot of times too, we have to risk disappointment, we have to risk hard feelings to really, really, really feel into what we want.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: And so that's another place where people really give a lot of power away the power of desire.
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: You know, desire is the current of life force running through you, desires where our growth and expansion comes from.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Like everybody that's growing and expanding is following their desire.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: And so when we have no desire, when we, when we shut that down within ourselves, it's, you know, all of that desires got to go somewhere and it's not great in, in metastasizes in our, in our lives, in our body, like unmet desires, unrecognized, it turns into like resentment, like unrecognized, unrecognized desires often turns into resentment and anger and bitterness when, when we don't let ourselves have our desires.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: So you can play with desire the same way that you play with with limitations.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: It's like, well, what do I want?
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: Well, what do I want, and whether or not you get it right away or I Guess right away is Is okay, but it's like learning to have a desire because that desire is super, super powerful.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: Like that's the place where we grow and expand.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: And that's another place where, when you have a really good handle on your desire, it's like you will start to have much more power over your money.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: So those are some things where I see power given away to money and where you can start to really have power in your money is like the first thing is to really figure out what do I want, what do I really really want here?
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: What do I want to be better, what do I want to be different?
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: And then we can start looking at all right, well, what about?
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: My mind needs to shift right so we can start to get over those limitations.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: And then it's taking the action and getting started.
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: Right, it's getting.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: It's taking the action, so it's doing the thing.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: So if you want to save and invest, it's opening the account and getting started wherever you can get started today, you know.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: Or if you want to travel, it's booking the hotel room or you know we're making the calls to the places or putting, you know, the money down on the flights or whatever it is.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: And then it's learning to feel good, regardless of what your money is doing.
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: It's learning to feel good when your money's up.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: It's learning to feel good when your money's down.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: It's learning to become an abundant person and trust that the money's coming back even when the money flows out.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: That's a place that a lot of people get really, really tangled up Because the nature of money is to flow.
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: It's an in and an out, right?
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: So it's like your paycheck comes in, your paycheck goes out, your revenue comes in, your expenses go out, the tide comes in, the tide goes out.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: Your breath goes in, the breath comes out.
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: And when we're afraid to let that money go out, it's unhelpful, it doesn't, it just doesn't work real great.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: So, starting to separate your internal state, so you have power over your internal state, your internal state isn't dictated by where your money is at today.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: That's a really, really big place, you know, and then doing the things that you want to do, serving the world, the way that you want to serve the world, and not having money be the goal.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: And I'll tell you, money is a terrible goal, because people are not satisfied ever, like we're not supposed to be, we're supposed to grow and expand, we're supposed to want more, we're supposed to do more, and so if money is the only goal, what ends up happening is there's so many ways to make money that you cannot get a clear decision on anything, right?
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: There's so many ways, even if you're in your business.
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: And even so, I'll give you an example, because I've totally done this, where I'm like, all right, well, I want to make you know an extra $30,000 this month, so how could I do it?
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, well, I could offer this and I could offer this and I could offer this.
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: And then I get into the pricing and I get into the upsells and blah, blah, blah, and it's like none of the paths look super clear and none of them look super, super great.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: But I'm but I will tell you that if I'm like this is a thing I really want to offer and I really want to help these people with this particular thing, I'm really enthusiastic and eager to do this particular thing.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: The money comes, but it's like when I'm trying to chase the money, the money always eludes me and it's never enough and it's not satisfying and I'm not really.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'm confessing this to you on my podcast, but this is like a thing that happens for a lot of people.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: So you know, when you're thinking about your power and your money, you want to, you want to have the power of decision.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: That's a power that you want to have.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: You want to have that emotional power, you want to have the power of desire and clarity and you want to have the power to take action and trust that the money is going to be there for you.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: You know, like saving the money, investing the money, starting to do the things and really starting to take control of the life that you want to live by starting to harness that money.
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: So those are some ways that you can start to have some more power over money.
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: All right, I hope you learned something.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: I hope this was helpful for you.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: Please leave a review on my podcast and please share with a friend.
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: All right, I love you.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: I appreciate you.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: Thanks, bye.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: It was my pleasure and joy to talk with you today.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: If you found value in our conversation, I kindly ask you to share the show with a friend who deserves to unleash her financial power.
• 21:19
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• 21:24
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• 21:33
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• 21:49
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• 21:58
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