Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / #HURDLEMOMENT: An Honest Mental Health Check-In & 5 Strategies for Boosting It

Transcript

#HURDLEMOMENT: An Honest Mental Health Check-In & 5 Strategies for Boosting It · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

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  Speaker 1: Mental health is just as important as your physical health,
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: and if you do not take the time to prioritize it,
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: then that struggle, that inner turmoil, it will manifest itself
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: in other ways in your life. Hey, Handlers hits me
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: Emily a body popping in with another installment of Hurdle
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: moment from Hurdle this week, I am getting vulnerable, and
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: that's because I think it's about time that we get
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: upfront about what's been going on here. And by what's
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: been going on here, I mean let's do a little
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  Speaker 1: bit of a mental health check in. I have certainly
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  Speaker 1: talked about mental health on the show before and also
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  Speaker 1: over on social media, shared a little bit about my journey,
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  Speaker 1: especially a trip that I had to Abiza last year
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  Speaker 1: where I did a self reflection exercise that made me
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  Speaker 1: fully come to terms at the time with the negative
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: conversation that was happening inside my own head. And it
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: was that experience in a visa in early twenty nineteen
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  Speaker 1: where I came to fully understand that we are the
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  Speaker 1: people that talk to ourselves the most over the course
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  Speaker 1: of any given day. And since then, I mean, of course,
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  Speaker 1: a lot has happened, a lot, a lot I mean,
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  Speaker 1: we're in a pandemic, so a lot of us have
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  Speaker 1: been struggling with mental health, dealing with so many emotions
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  Speaker 1: because of the unexpected, because of perhaps a shift in
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  Speaker 1: our work schedule, a shift in our personal life, spending
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  Speaker 1: more time alone, not being able to work out as
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  Speaker 1: you want to.
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  Speaker 2: I mean, the list of reasons.
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  Speaker 1: Why your mental health could be suffering right now is
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  Speaker 1: literally endless. But I'm here to talk about where I'm at,
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  Speaker 1: kind of have an honest one on one with all
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  Speaker 1: of you, and in turn then offer up some of
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  Speaker 1: the tips and tricks that I have used to give
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  Speaker 1: my own mental health a boost when the times truly
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  Speaker 1: do feel tough, and trust me, they have felt tough,
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  Speaker 1: especially lately. I've said it before. Mental health is kind
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  Speaker 1: of one of those taboo topics like sex or your finances.
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  Speaker 1: It's something that people don't often talk about all that much,
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  Speaker 1: but it is so important. Mental health is just as
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  Speaker 1: important as your physical health, and if you do not
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  Speaker 1: take the time to prioritize it, then that struggle, that
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  Speaker 1: inner turmoil, it will manifest itself in other ways in
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  Speaker 1: your life. We have the opportunity to talk about mental health,
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  Speaker 1: to have open and honest dialogues, and that again is
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  Speaker 1: why I am having one here on the show today.
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  Speaker 1: If this resonates with you, if this episode is something
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  Speaker 1: that you can relate to, please.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: Do me a favor.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: If you have yet to do so, head on into
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: the iTunes store, rate and review the show, give it
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: five stars and let the people.
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: Know why you love Hurdle.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: Also, make sure you're keeping up with Hurdle on social
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: media over at Hurdle Podcast.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: I am also over at Emily a Body.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: And if you want to get into some more of
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: the topics that you are hearing about on the show,
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: a great way to connect with me is through.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: The Hurdle sessions.
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  Speaker 1: There are slew of them that have already happened, but
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: live recordings are available for purchase over on the Hurdle website.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: And then some really exciting upcoming sessions as well. I've
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: got building a social media presence and also a media
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: strategy for fitness professionals. If either of those sound interesting
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: to you, I've got your back.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: The links to both of those are in the show notes.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: And with that, let's get to hurdling.
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  Speaker 2: It was a.
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  Speaker 1: Sunday night about I'd say a little bit over a
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  Speaker 1: month ago that I was sitting on my couch really
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  Speaker 1: beside myself. I actually remember that I went on Instagram
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  Speaker 1: and it was the week that I was hosting a
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  Speaker 1: hurdle session on how to find your Power alone, and
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  Speaker 1: I'm sitting on the couch and I'm feeling so lonely
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  Speaker 1: at the time, and I'm just thinking to myself, like,
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  Speaker 1: how am I supposed to show up and preach to
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  Speaker 1: other people and offer them my best tips and tricks
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  Speaker 1: when I myself am feeling some kind of way. But
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  Speaker 1: the reality is is that no matter how much work
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  Speaker 1: that you do, and trust me, I am here putting
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  Speaker 1: in a lot of it, there are going to be
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  Speaker 1: times that certain thoughts and feelings arise. But the difference
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  Speaker 1: is that with time, if you do that work, you
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  Speaker 1: get to be in a better place of handling these thoughts,
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  Speaker 1: these feelings, and these emotions. I'm going to talk a
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  Speaker 1: little bit about that time I reflect on twenty twenty,
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  Speaker 1: and I think a lot of us can agree that
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: in March it was kind of like shell shock, and
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: then in April and early May it was a real struggle.
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  Speaker 1: It was definitely a dark time. Whether you were going
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: through this time solo like me, or navigating it with
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  Speaker 1: a partner around it has been confusing, and especially during
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  Speaker 1: that period, it was just a lot, a lot of feelings,
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  Speaker 1: a lot of wanting things to be how they were not,
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  Speaker 1: a lot of wondering when we would see the other
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  Speaker 1: side of this, a lot of being frustrated in a
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  Speaker 1: new quote unquote normal, a lot of missing friends and family,
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  Speaker 1: of missing physical touch, of wanting to break free of
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  Speaker 1: these boundaries that we were not placing on ourselves, but
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: rather something else was setting them for us. And so,
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  Speaker 1: like many of you, I would assume during that time period,
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  Speaker 1: I was certainly struggling on the mental health front, and
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  Speaker 1: I noticed that I manifested that struggle in my eating habits.
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  Speaker 1: I would often go to my refrigerator walk over to
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  Speaker 1: my pantry like ten to fourteen times in one day,
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  Speaker 1: not because I was hungry, but because I was looking
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  Speaker 1: for an outlet. Right at the time, I was also
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  Speaker 1: dealing with a little bit of a hip injury, and
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  Speaker 1: I couldn't move my body like and so instead I
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  Speaker 1: leaned in to all of these foods and in turn
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  Speaker 1: felt really bad about my body and about the negative
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  Speaker 1: self talk that was going on in my head, and
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  Speaker 1: then summer happened, and summer I felt pretty good. You know.
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  Speaker 1: It was good to have the opportunity to have some
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  Speaker 1: more flexibility while being safe, of course, to see some
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  Speaker 1: friends and family, to get outside of the four walls
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  Speaker 1: of my apartment a little bit more, to enjoy the sun,
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  Speaker 1: and just truly embrace a little bit more of the
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  Speaker 1: normalcy I once knew. But somewhere in the middle of August,
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  Speaker 1: I felt that loneliness creeping back in. And I can
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  Speaker 1: definitely peg it to a few things, But for me,
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  Speaker 1: that loneliness really stemmed from dealing with the emotions of
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  Speaker 1: so many people that I care about, either leaving the
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  Speaker 1: city at that time or letting me know that they
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  Speaker 1: would be leaving the city in a few months, and
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  Speaker 1: worrying about, you know, my place in the scheme of things,
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  Speaker 1: and wondering, am I supposed to be leaving too? Am
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  Speaker 1: I doing something wrong? Should I be reevaluating everything that
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  Speaker 1: I knew? All the things that I thought were stable,
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  Speaker 1: felt completely shaky.
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  Speaker 2: Pair this with me, for the.
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  Speaker 1: First time in a long time, working really diligently to
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  Speaker 1: set some boundaries. These boundaries kind of span from personal
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  Speaker 1: to professional. Admittedly, between August and September, I had a
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  Speaker 1: few really difficult conversations about the capacity in which I
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  Speaker 1: could show up in the relationships as they stood at
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  Speaker 1: the time. I think, especially over the course of the pandemic,
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  Speaker 1: I found that I was leaning into some unhealthy relationships
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  Speaker 1: looking for a sense of stability, but the reality was
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  Speaker 1: that the relationships weren't necessarily providing me with stability. In fact,
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  Speaker 1: they were more so an energy dream and I didn't
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  Speaker 1: recognize that or want to come to terms with that
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  Speaker 1: because they were familiar, right, they were something that I felt.
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  Speaker 1: I felt they were safe, but they weren't safe, and
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  Speaker 1: they were doing more harm than good. And so again,
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  Speaker 1: for the first time in a really long time, I
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  Speaker 1: started to walk away from situationships, so to speak, that
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  Speaker 1: weren't serving me. And that's really weird to talk about,
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  Speaker 1: but it was really fucking hard and really sad. You know,
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  Speaker 1: I got one of those We're not Really Strangers text
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  Speaker 1: messages the other day. If you've never heard about it before,
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  Speaker 1: I've talked about the on the show. Stemming from this
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  Speaker 1: card game We're not Really Strangers, the founder started offering
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  Speaker 1: text messages that you can sign up for in her community.
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  Speaker 1: And it's like hard hitting pieces of advice and facts
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  Speaker 1: that are like super hard to deal with in the
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  Speaker 1: moment when they show up on your phone. So the
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  Speaker 1: one that showed up to me the other day was
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  Speaker 1: pay more attention to who they really are than who
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  Speaker 1: you want them to be. I just candidly speaking, had
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  Speaker 1: a lot of people in my life that I wanted
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  Speaker 1: them to be something that they weren't from me, and
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  Speaker 1: I kept holding on and I kept grasping for more
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  Speaker 1: and wanting more, and I just wasn't getting it. With time,
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  Speaker 1: not saying right away because that would be a complete lie.
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  Speaker 1: I'm still definitely emotionally processing a lot of this stuff,
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  Speaker 1: but with time, this stuff gets better. With time, I
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  Speaker 1: started to fully understand that I need to look out
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  Speaker 1: for me and I need to look out for my
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  Speaker 1: mental health. And so it wasn't just this, you know,
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  Speaker 1: protecting my energy, holding on to good relationships, walking away
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  Speaker 1: from bad relationships, and doing that sort of stuff. There
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  Speaker 1: were also other strategies as I mentioned that I started
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  Speaker 1: to implement to really take back the reins on my
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  Speaker 1: mental health. And that's now what I'm going to get into.
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  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening. To me as I rambled about
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  Speaker 1: all that stuff. I feel as though I am sweating
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  Speaker 1: now speaking into this microphone. Okay, So I want to
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  Speaker 1: transition a little bit into the strategies that I'm using
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  Speaker 1: to boost my mental health. Strategy Number one, find the
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  Speaker 1: things that make you happy and do them. This really
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  Speaker 1: started to stick for me over the summer. On Sundays,
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  Speaker 1: I began taking a two hour or so by gride
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  Speaker 1: to the beach by myself and spending three to four
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  Speaker 1: hours there and then biking back into some people. That
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  Speaker 1: might sound like your own personal version of hell, but
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  Speaker 1: for me, it was a time to reclaim my sanity
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  Speaker 1: and just for the most part, disconnect and take my
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  Speaker 1: me time. So that was one thing that I started
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  Speaker 1: to do for myself that really really helped. But the
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  Speaker 1: other thing that I knew that I loved and have
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  Speaker 1: been really embracing lately are the sacred aspects of my
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  Speaker 1: morning routine, especially on Tuesdays. I'm a member of a
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  Speaker 1: track club here in New York, and we meet on
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  Speaker 1: Tuesday mornings, again in a safe and socially distant way,
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  Speaker 1: and after track club every Tuesday, I've been biking over
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  Speaker 1: to one of my favorite cafes again, mostly solo and
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  Speaker 1: sitting there and indulging in a muffin and loving it
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  Speaker 1: and then sipping warm coffee and just taking a minute.
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  Speaker 1: And I know that Tuesday every week is the time
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  Speaker 1: that's me time. As someone who's constantly giving, I feel
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  Speaker 1: like a good portion of myself by choice because I
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  Speaker 1: want to, because I feel like it is my purpose.
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  Speaker 1: I have to identify the times where I have to
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  Speaker 1: give back to myself fill up my cup. And this
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  Speaker 1: mental health boost for me finding again the things that
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  Speaker 1: make me happy and indulging and enjoying them has been
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  Speaker 1: really really clutch over the past month or so. The
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  Speaker 1: second strategy that I have used to boost mental health
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  Speaker 1: positive affirmations.
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  Speaker 2: I have a couple post its on my front door.
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  Speaker 1: I see them before I leave every morning, and they
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  Speaker 1: include a positive affirmation or seven and that it is
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  Speaker 1: you are capable, you are worthy, you are bold, you
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  Speaker 1: are beautiful, and you've got this. And I see that,
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  Speaker 1: and I'm reminded of all of these things and that
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  Speaker 1: I can do hard things, that I am I'm worthy
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  Speaker 1: of the energy. And I think it's really helpful to
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  Speaker 1: start your day off on that positive note. You know,
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  Speaker 1: people have talked to for the show before. They also
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  Speaker 1: have used the power of positive affirmation. I know Robin
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  Speaker 1: Arzon of Peloton. She keeps post its on the mirrors
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  Speaker 1: in her home and literally says to herself in the
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  Speaker 1: morning something like you are a badass, and like how
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  Speaker 1: awesome is that? Right? Another strategy for boosting your mental
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  Speaker 1: health write a thank you note. I have a book
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: of thank you notes. I know that's super random. I
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  Speaker 1: of course also write thank you notes and send them.
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  Speaker 1: But for me, going back to this gratitude practice, that
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  Speaker 1: is just so so important, finding the time to write
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  Speaker 1: thank you notes to people or even just things that
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  Speaker 1: make you feel good. I have thank you notes written
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  Speaker 1: to real people like my parents, and also in this
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  Speaker 1: notebook gratitude notes written to my favorite restaurant or a
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  Speaker 1: particular pair of sneakers.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: I am serious. I know that sounds bizarre, It's okay.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: And by taking the time to write these notes and
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: pressing pause, it's a moment of solace, and that solace
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  Speaker 1: is just so so valuable. Another strategy to boost your
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: mental health go for a walk. This is the one
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  Speaker 1: that comes in the most clutch for me when I
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: literally feel like I'm going to throw my laptop out
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  Speaker 1: of my fourth floor window in the middle of the workday.
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  Speaker 1: For me, if I feel stuck, if I feel unsure,
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: if I feel cranky, whatever it is, before I let
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  Speaker 1: it get out of hand, I stand up, I put
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: on my sandals or some slip on sneakers, and I
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  Speaker 1: just go for a ten minute walk around the block.
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  Speaker 1: And some days that walk involves me getting an ice
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  Speaker 1: cream cone, nice coffee, and other days it's just a walk.
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  Speaker 1: But whatever happens on that walk, I can guarantee that
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  Speaker 1: I'll walk back up those four flights of stairs and
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  Speaker 1: I'm going to feel more confident at the end of it.
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  Speaker 1: I'm going to feel more centered. I'm going to feel
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  Speaker 1: like I got my act together at least just a
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  Speaker 1: little bit, and more capable of handling what is going on.
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  Speaker 1: And my last important strategy to boost mental health today
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  Speaker 1: is talking to a friend. It is important in our
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: life that we identify the people that have our backs.
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  Speaker 2: And you don't.
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  Speaker 1: Need an army, you just need a few close confidants.
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  Speaker 1: Understand and recognize who those people are in your life,
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  Speaker 1: who you can rely on when times get hard, and
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  Speaker 1: know the importance of opening up to them instead of
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: keeping everything bottled inside. Nine times out of ten. And
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  Speaker 1: I said this on a recent episode. If you feel
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: as though you are going through something and you feel alone,
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  Speaker 1: if you vocalize it to someone else as well, they
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: are going to say right back to you. You know what,
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: I can totally relate and that conversation, that dialogue, It
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: is so important. So identify your squad, and that's a
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: huge step in the right direction. You know, I've been
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: reading a lot on Twitter lately, and I see that
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: other people feel like me. That a lot of people
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: are saying that they too felt like the summer was
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: kind of a breeze and now that the temperatures are
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: getting colder, there's a lot of worry about what's going
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: to happen with our world and the flu and god
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: knows what else. And listen, we're all dealing with the
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: same worry right now. And it's so important to take
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: the opportunity to give back to yourself, to have open
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: conversations about your mental health and just know that you
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: are not alone and taking the time to give back
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  Speaker 1: to you. It's never, ever, ever, ever time wasted. Thanks
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: for hearing me out today, y'all. It means the world
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: at Emilia Body at Hurdle Podcast, another hurdle conquered.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: Catch you guys next time.