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Your Worst Moment Doesn't Get to Define You · Intentional Guy

• Michael Chestnut: Hey, welcome back to the intentional guy. It's so good to have you with us today. I want to ask you if your identity is still wrapped around the worst moment of your life, you're carrying something you were never meant to carry. My guest today can tell you exactly how to build an identity that has nothing to do with your worst moment. Randall Gladden, it is so good to have you with us today. And thank you for being on here. J Randall Gladden: Hey, Michael, thanks for thanks for having me. And I appreciate all the effort you put into this. And so yeah, I'm excited to see what God's gonna do. Michael Chestnut: I I am too. You have a terrific story. But if I just want to hand this over to you right now, Randall, and I know that you've got a powerful story, and I know that you understand the message I just said about how we allow the worst moments in our lives. To define us. And I did that for 15 years. God took me on a journey of 15 years. But I can say 20 years later now, I no longer wake up saying I'm stupid. I no no longer wake up saying, Man, I wish I was dead. I wake up understanding what I never understood my whole entire life, and that is being able to have real peace. J Randall Gladden: Yeah, I think there's two aspects, Michael, that I'm gonna give them to you backwards. Okay. The first Michael Chestnut: Perfect. J Randall Gladden: is expectation. Okay. And what is it you expect? No matter for the moment, just forget everything, whatever mistakes you've made, however you what's your expectation? I'm gonna give you an example now. I didn't get married until I was 40. And when I say that, people think, second, no, no, no, first time. I'm a slow learner. And so when my first son was born. Literally the day he was born, I came to a conclusion. I wanted him to grow up with this excitement, this expectation of what God was going to do. So I started, because kids will believe what you tell them. So Michael Chestnut: Yes. J Randall Gladden: I started telling him from the time, literally the day he was born, God has big plans for you, little man. And then four years later, my second son was born, and the same thing. And they at this point, they are so tired of hearing it. But We've got to understand, no matter what your background is, no matter, it doesn't matter. Our God, that's one of the things is the second part is getting established and get it settled in your spirit. Not just words, God is good. You've got to get it so settled in your spirit that God is good and He is for you. Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: Because if you don't have that, you you know, you you made a comment in an email, which I appreciate, like what verse has kept you going, et cetera. I think that's a powerful tool. But what you need beneath that tool, if you don't truly trust the one who's given that promise to you, then then it's good at moments, but it's weak in other times. When you're really under Michael Chestnut: Yes. J Randall Gladden: pressure, you've got to be two points, you've got to be completely established in God is good and he's outrageously generous, whether we deserve it or not. And everything that God says, every promise is an absolute commitment. On his part. God is not like us with our mistakes and with our like you say something and then you don't fall. God is perfect in all of his ways, even when we don't understand. And we've got Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: to get settled in that as a foundation. Because once you get settled in that, then you can slowly, it doesn't, you and you know this. It doesn't happen necessarily overnight, although if it does for somebody else, hey, great, good for you. But it it starts with that recognition that, okay, God, you're good, regardless of how things look for me, regardless of how I feel, that day that I don't want to get out of bed. You know, brutal honesty, those days you're going, God, just can you just like rapture me right now and let's just be done with this? Y you know. Sometimes the conversation was a lot harder than that, if you know what I mean. Michael Chestnut: Yes. J Randall Gladden: It's not a until you can get past looking at circumstances, you will be defined by those circumstances. Michael Chestnut: Hmm. J Randall Gladden: But once you get settled, and again, you know, as you and I have talked about, our story is we went through some battles where we we literally, and other people have similar stories, we lost everything. I couldn't even take care of my family. I felt like that big. Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: And my wife was working at that point. We had lost everything. We're trying to save our house. My wife was working two jobs, one of them from four in the morning stocking shelves for basically minimum wage. And then working till noon and then going to another job. And again, it just I just felt like a complete failure. And but there was still that glimmer that God, I gotta believe you have something for me. I've got to believe you've got something. And it took time. It didn't happen overnight for me. But I think for me, I I did. I had to get settled in God is good even when I'm wrong, even when I've blown it. Whether it's my fault, not my fault. None of those things matter. God is not just good, but he's for you. And and when you've got to get established in that identity, and you've probably used it a hundred times with with your your work, but look at Gideon, and he's such a great example. This is how God approaches us. Gideon is hiding in a threshing floor, in a wine press, hiding from the enemies. Because he's timid. He's intimidated. And the angel of the Lord shows up to him and says, Mighty warrior. Now, I know if it was me in those circumstances, you're kind of looking over your shoulder like, I think there's Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: been a mistake here, right? But that's not what God does. You know, God declared his identity before he empowered him because he goes on and says, You are going to deliver my people from their oppression. And it's that understanding that everyone that you work with, Michael, everyone you're communicating with, even through your podcast, etc., God has an identity for them and a purpose that is bigger than them. God has a purpose for each one of his people bigger than. Then we recognize. And often, I think in the new world also, don't limit it by just traditional ministry. It's a whole new world. God is Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: going to use people in ways you can't even imagine. Don't constrain him by the picture of what you think it has to look like. Just be willing to say, God, you're good. Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: My mistakes, you knew when you claim me as your own, you already knew every mistake I was going to make. And you still said, You're mine. And God, you know, and I've said this to you before, Michael, that when you say yes to Jesus, we think of it as we came to him. But Jesus said, Nobody comes to him but the Father draws him. So Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: God, when you say yes to Jesus, God has claimed you as his very own. And again, that's all part of that getting it really settled that regardless of your circumstances, God has claimed you as his own. He's got good for you. even when you don't see it. And it's interesting for our members. I we we did an episode, it hasn't played yet. Psalm says that, you know, it talks about being blessed, the good man, and blessed, those who pursue God. And it talks about all these blessings. And then it comes down in Psalms one twelve and it says, They will not fear bad news, being steadfast in their heart, trusting in God. Now that sounds great when things are going okay. yeah. Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: I've until and normally it's not necessarily one piece of bad news, but when you're in that cycle where it's just that that repeated battery, and then you get that piece of bad news. And it's like, how do you get to the point where that doesn't phase you? And you have to have that experience of the recognition that the reality of God's goodness touching your life. Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: In his faithfulness. And I've been there where you had to literally go, I don't see a way out of this guy. I mean, I literally, if we go back, Michael, to when we were at the lowest point in our battle. I didn't see how my family would survive. I mean, literally. And now then I'm just excited about. I don't get me wrong, wouldn't want to go through it again. I'm Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: not not that crazy, but I'm just so excited about what God has imparted to me in the process and what He's empowering me to. And I want to see other people live that out, that what God has for them. Michael Chestnut: I agree because I one of the I would never want to go back through what I've gone through. Not never in a million years. But at the in the same breath, I will tell you, I would not give up that 15-year journey. Because in that 15-year journey, I learned so much about God I would never have known otherwise. And J Randall Gladden: You know, this is cool. I I gotta interrupt you because this is so cool. Because so God brings the Israelites out of Egypt, right? Great miracles, they walk out blessed, and He's made this amazing promise. I've given you this land. So what's the expectation? this is easy. God just did the amazing, outrageous miracles. This is going to be easy, right? But two aspects to that. One is he took them into the wilderness. Now we hear wilderness. And we think of dry, desolate, you know, nothing there. But the word wilderness literally is a bad. And what it means is the place where God is heard. And when you so what was God doing? God had to take them to that place where they knew him because for them to take hold, to possess what he had for them, they were going to have to face challenges they'd never faced before beyond what they could do. They had to learn to trust him. They had to learn to trust in his goodness, his provision. And it's the same way for us. That wilderness season, and like you said, I wouldn't want to go back through, I wouldn't want to start that cycle all over again. But in retrospect, you see how, you know, Job, at the end of Job, it's a crazy story we never completely understand, but there's a profound point at the end where Job says. Before I had heard about you. Now I've seen you. The relationship changed. And I think, you know, Michael Chestnut: Hm J Randall Gladden: maybe I'm wrong. Hang on. Maybe I've got to reiterate. I said you gotta hit it at your foundation that God is good. I think if you gotta focus on something, it's letting that relationship change. So many people know about God, they can even quote the promises, whatever. do you get to that place and it's not as hard as it sounds i think everybody approaches it different to where you're knowing god knowing him not knowing about him knowing him in a new and deeper way on a continual basis that's what's going to power your life Michael Chestnut: think the hardest part for me was unlearning what I needed to unlearn because we only know what we know, right? And I'm dealing with a supernatural God. And in my situation that took place, I had never and I I grew up as a pastor's kid and everything else. I had never seen a man fall and restored. Never. And so to me, it wasn't not it It wasn't about whether or not it was possible. I knew it wasn't possible because that was my experience. Right. And I had I had to realize I remember one of someone said something to me, a a friend of mine. and you said this earlier, he said, Mike, when God chose you, did you think he didn't know all this was going to happen in your life? He's like, if You gotta start trusting God and let God decide what he's going to do now with this. And and that was powerful for me because then I realized I I like to catastrophi things. I'm really good at catastrophying things. Right? And I'm having J Randall Gladden: Sorry, that's what Michael Chestnut: to learn to stop doing that because my life first is Proverbs three, five, and six. And all it took was one person when I fell, say, well, you need a new life first. That that doesn't serve you. And J Randall Gladden: Yeah. Michael Chestnut: I but I I accepted what they said, And I'm always the worst case scenario in my own mind. I'm never the hero in my story. I'm I'm I'm the villain all the time. But I have to tell you that it took time to unlearn how to not catastrophi everything happening in your life. And then I had a friend in my life that was like, Hey, but let's look at the winds. Let's look at what God's doing. J Randall Gladden: Yeah. You know it's funny you say that, Michael, but because I think all of us to some degree do that. Again, you get that piece of bad news, you don't see the way out. And but that's a part we forget. And I here's the thing that, because you know, I grew up in church and I think for me, one of the things that I always struggled with is I want this is gonna sound weird, so bear with me. I want the God of the Old Testament. Now, let me explain what I mean there. Because for some people, you think of the God of the Old Testament as like judgmental. No, no, no. Jesus says he perfectly reflected the Father. So how do we reconcile it? What we see is a God who's desperately trying to show people his faithfulness and his love, but also one who is comes through for his people in powerful ways, beyond them. When they were desperate. One of my favorites is 2 Chronicles 2020. They get the news, this massive army is on the march or on the way, and they're so overwhelmed that the king prays. We don't even know what to do. We don't even know what to pray except our eyes are on you. I mean, that's talk overwhelmed. And all they had to do was follow God's instructions. But again, it goes back to that you've got to get it settled. That God is for you, that God is good, that Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: at the darkest moment. Is when he gets glorified. Michael Chestnut: Yes. J Randall Gladden: And even though we don't understand, and there are seasons that we may not love, God is at work. And that's preparation. And if we can change that mindset, make that shift to the recognition. One of the things you you know I talk about a lot about is identity, empowerment, and purpose. And it's making that mental shift. That getting it settled, it's not in our strength. Now we have to apply ourselves. We have to show up for work, so to speak. But it's the expectation, God, you're the one. A great example is I got this young guy down in Mexicali, Mexicale, Mexico, great kid. And he's just a gifted evangelist. And we were on a call a few years ago, and he was really discouraged because he sees the winds once in a while, but he also sees Where didn't, you know, he didn't see any progress. And he was carrying that weight on himself. And I had to tell him, hang on, you're trying to do God's job. And he's like, what do mean? I said, that's your calling. Okay. But here's the thing: one plants, another waters, God gives the increase. Your role is just to share. His job is to bring the transformation. As long as you try to carry the weight of his job, you're going to be crushed. And a great example is Paul says, I worked harder than anybody else. But it wasn't me that worked. It was God's grace at work through me. In other words, he applied himself and God's grace, we think of it as when God covers over our shortcomings. And that's not really it. It does, but that's not the real point. Grace is literally empowerment. It was God's. So what we have to recognize is when you're applying yourself. But you're not putting the hands on, you're not gauging it based on you, then that's when God's supernatural empowerment is at work, touching in ways you never could yourself. And that's who God has called you to be, called each one of us to be, is his sons and daughters, the heirs to his kingdom, that are that living demonstration of his goodness. And that doesn't mean we don't have the battles. We live in a fallen Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: world. Doesn't mean we don't have the setbacks, but it does mean that God is for us and He's working in all of those. And here's the other aspect I think that I had to learn. We we have a tendency, maybe not you, but you've probably seen it. We try to put faith in the outcome. So so, Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: in other words, this is what it's going to look like, or this is what the Michael Chestnut: yeah. J Randall Gladden: promise is. And so we're applying faith to that. But the reality is no. Faith literally means agreement. We think of it as belief, but the problem with that is when we think of belief, then we've got to get this feeling that we believe it. But it literally fundamentally means agree. Okay, God, I agree you're good. I agree you've said this. I'm relying on that. I don't know what it's going to look like, but I'm relying on it. So we make that shift to where putting our faith on God, this is your goodness, this is your commitment. I don't know how it's going to happen. I don't know what it will look like, but this is what I am placing all of my weight. You talked about Proverbs. So when it says trust in the Lord with all of your heart, the word trust there literally means to place all of your weight on something. Like Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: literally, you're you're applying everything you've got, your hopes, your dreams, your life. I'm putting everything on this, God. That's what trust means. It's not just a casual, that's that aspect of faith. And it's not about what the outcome will look like. It's the fact that who's the one doing the work and who is good and who's made this outrageous commitment. And going back to identity, then it becomes the recognition, it's not about how perfectly I've got it. Now we're continuing to improve, don't get me wrong, but it's about that recognition that God called you as his son or his daughter. And he's empowered you. And he's got destiny is a funny word for Christians because it's kind of taking this connotation of a given. I'll put it this way: destiny is what God has available for you if you will lean into it. You Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: know, a great here's a great story. I'll give you a really fast one. So Elijah is this amazing prophet, right? Outrageous miracles. And then he comes up to this young guy, Elisha, who clearly comes from a successful family. Like 12 teams of oxen are all blawing at the same time. And he throws his mantle on the guy. Now that was culturally the invitation to follow me. Okay. Now, Michael Chestnut: Okay. J Randall Gladden: and here's where it gets really good. So Elisha jumps down and says, Let me say goodbye to my parents. And and it says something weird. It's like, Elisha says, What have I done to you? But what that meant culturally is. Count the cost. So Elisha gave up everything, right? And he follows Elisha for years. And then there comes the moment when God's going to take Elijah away, and Elisha kind of starts putting him off, like, I'm going to go here, you stay here. And Elisha could have fallen into rejection. This is where people get bitter, they get frustrated with their leader, their mentor, whatever. But Elisha just was persistent, despite the fact he's kind of get put off. And you know the story, what happens? I want a double portion, you got to be there, and it all happens. But here's the piece we forget. God had told Elisha, if you go back two chapters, God had told Elisha to pick Elisha. Elisha could have given up. He could have gotten frustrated. He could have missed out on what God had already ordained. Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: Because he could have looked at circumstances. You know, I gave up everything to follow this guy, and now he's putting me off, and I'm just, I'm taking my ball and going home, right? But God had ordained so much, you know, years before, this is to be your successor, but Elisha had to walk that out. And it's the same way for you and I and your listeners. God has so much available for us. And we have to walk that out. And the issue is, again, going back to identity, getting frustrated. Circumstances don't look the way we expected them to, the setbacks, whatever it may be. And then you compound it with the reality is we have a very real enemy. And what's his tactic? To whisper in your ear, fill in the blank. You're not worthy. You blew it. You can't fix this. It's too late. It's, I mean, Michael, I'm 63 years old. And I'm more excited about what God has for me now than I've ever been in my life. Michael Chestnut: Yay. Same. J Randall Gladden: Now, if you'd said that to me 10 years ago, I'd be, you know, eight or nine years ago, I'd be like, I don't even know how we survive, much less get excited about what's coming next. And that's that's the biggest battle. The biggest battle is not against your circumstances. It's not against whatever challenges facing you. The foundational battle is: who am I in Christ? Who has He called me? To be, what's he doing? What's he committed to? What's his goodness? And especially when I can't define it. Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: That's to me the foundation of faith. When you get to the point where you can say, God, I don't have a promise. I don't have a verse that relates to this. But I am just absolutely grounded in you're good. Somehow, this is going to be amazing. Somehow I'm going to look back and go. That was worth it. Michael Chestnut: Yep. I tell you, I and I I resonate that so much because fifteen years ago, I saw no end in sight of pain. And that's exactly where the the theme of the show, intentional guy, came from, because then I realized, you know what, you are intentionally listening to the wrong voices. You are intentionally not doing what you need to do. And and so God gave me that word intentional, saying, I need you to be intentional every day when you get up. Even on the days when you don't feel like it, I want you to say, Hey and it started with I told you that Since I was a kid, there wasn't a day go by that I I did not wake up and say, I hate myself. Out loud, that was something I'd always said because of some trauma and stuff in my life. And God said, We're gonna start there. And he was like, Every day that I got up, I got up with, Today you're beautifully and wonderfully made. Did not believe it. Co hard to accept it, but God was like, You're gonna repeat this. And I started doing that. And, you know, over time, that left me. You know, that part left. But I had to be intentionally mindful in what I did. And then I I I learned I need to be intentional who I'm hanging out with, who are the people I'm spending my time with. And I learned about, you know, you are the sum of the five people you you are you hang out with. J Randall Gladden: You know, can I can I interact and tell you a cool story along those lines? So I've got this member, this great gal over in the Czech Republic, grew up in church and but battling health issues. And she brutal honesty, you know, I won't use a name because she, you know, this is private conversation, but she said she didn't really believe God would heal. But she began to pray and quote. God's promises of healing over herself. She didn't really believe they would work, but she just, I'm going to do this. And what she found was it transformed her thinking first. And then she realized her health was being transformed. So, you know, first John says, Beloved, I desire that you would prosper and be in health as your soul prospers. And you know, when I grew up in church, it's like, like, Soul prospering sounded like achieving some degree of righteousness, right? Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: But but that's not what that says. That word soul literally is psyche. I desire for you to prosper and be in health as your thinking prospers. And how does your thinking prosper? By aligning with what God says, whether it makes sense, whether it's stuff we understand. It's not just what he wants for us. If you think about If you if you boil down sin, what's the issue with sin? It's it's three things. I'm gonna oversimplify. One, sin creates a barrier between us and God. Number two, Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: the two others are it either hurts us, it damages us, or it damages someone else. Why does Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: God detest sin? Because it separates us from him and it damages us and other people. So when God says, Yeah, don't do that, he's not being controlling. He's going, this isn't good for you. It's not good for the people around you. I've got better for you. And that's where the enemy and the world system, like, you know, this is harmless, or whatever the case may be. But yeah, you're right. We have to be intentional. And would you say, because you know, you've got a long journey you've been on, it got easier. It had still was volitional. You still had to make that commitment, but would you say you got Call it momentum. Michael Chestnut: yeah. I I were I remember the day that I I was like, you haven't had to fight that thought in forever. And that's when I realized that, you know, I remember that realization of how speaking truth, choosing to speak truth and God's truth and use scripture, overpowered what the enemy had told me for 30 some years, forty years. J Randall Gladden: Yeah. And and here's the funny part though, when you started, I'm guessing you probably didn't have a real confidence that this is Michael Chestnut: Not at all. J Randall Gladden: going to really change. But how much has just that, how much has that self-talk or whatever we want to call it, how much has that one practice transformed your life? Michael Chestnut: Amamazingly. Amazingly. It's changed everything and how I I behave and and you know Not just how I behave, but also how I believe. And it helped it has helped me hear God's voice more because I've been able now to filter out the enemy's voice. J Randall Gladden: And how is it, though? Let's take it to the next level, because you know I love empowerment of purpose. Identity is the foundation. You're never going to be truly effective when you're living from a corrupted identity. But as you've gotten more clear on identity and who God sees you as, because that's the establishment, how have you found that has given you greater clarity on purpose and understanding how? God has empowered you through your own gifts, et cetera, to touch other lives. Michael Chestnut: You know, I don't know if I have the right words to say to to explain it, but the clarity over it is crystal clear now. Where as when I started, it was not. And I was like, I even doubted like, can God even use me? And then it it went from, you know, okay, I'm going to be obedient. And and that I think that was the intentional part was choosing to be obedient and say the right scriptures. I had to I had to find scripture and repeat those over me. But then once I started doing it, then I just started seeing where God was bringing people to me. And before I knew it, I mean it wasn't even a choice because now I'm take I'm watching God use all the crap that took place in my life and now using it to help others. And it was it was tremendous. J Randall Gladden: Yeah, you know, it's funny. I I I have a kind of a weird style. I I, you know, publish books a couple of times a year. Mine are shorter. You know, that's my style is 75, 80 pages. That's that's, you Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: know, I'm pretty sure. Anyway, we just put out my most recent one. It's called Delegated Presence. And here's the cool part of it. We think of salvation is, okay, we get to go to heaven. Okay, remission of sins, but salvation literally means restoration. It's God restoring to his original intention. So if you go back, what's Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: delegated presence? When God says in Genesis, let us create man in our image, our likeness, and let them have dominion. It's very different than what we think. So when God says, let us make man in our image, that word doesn't really mean physical resemblance. It literally means, so so here's the best way to understand it. In the ancient world, kings would put a statue of themselves in a distant province. And that statue was the declaration, I rule here. That's who man was. God put Adam on the earth, and it was the living declaration of God's rule expressed through man. And lightness is not just another aspect of image. Lightness means to function like God. So literally, God puts Adam in the garden, and okay. You're my delegated presence. You are expected to function like I would. And when it says let them have dominion, we think of ruling or something. But what it really means is responsibility backed with authority. And then as I go through the book, we talk about how God, there are assignments in your life, whether it's work, family, relationship, whatever it is, where God wants you to be his delegated presence. And you look at Almost never do we understand that. You look at Esther. You know, here's the story: she's an orphan, she gets chosen, she becomes queen. It would be easy at that point in the story to think, okay, God, you've blessed. That's great. But then later, when the crisis comes, and her uncle says, It may be that God has positioned you for such a time as this. She brought God's purposes, which was Saving lives. Joseph, you know, he has this crazy dream, he makes a mistake at telling it to his brothers. That doesn't work out. We all know the story. Everybody loves Joseph. But there's two aspects of it we forget. Joseph worked his entire life for the benefit of Egypt. Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: And then after his father dies and the brothers are worried, he says two things. Now, the first part we get all the time God sent me ahead to save many a life. But he goes on and says something else, which I think is powerful and we overlook. To make a place for you so you would become a mighty nation. So when we talk about identity and being a leader, a mighty warrior, whatever terminology you want to put on it, why? Because God's purpose is so that He can touch people through you. David gets anointed to be king. Years on the run from Saul. Finally, he's made king, right? And then there's a really cool aspect to the story. And I forget exactly where it is, but the king of Lebanon sends a message down that I want to send you all this beautiful cedar wood so you can build a palace for yourself. And it said, then David realized God had made him king for the benefit of God's people. That's that point where so many people be like, wow, cool. I'm blessed. But what it says is David had this realization. Why was he king? For the benefit of God's people. So for all of your listeners and the men that you minister to and work with, God has a powerful identity that he established before the foundation of the earth. It's not like a hmm, what can we make out of this? Psalms Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: 139, before the foundation of the earth, he wrote the days for you. And that powerful identity is bigger than you. One of the most powerful things we can get is the realization. You want to get settled in your identity is realize it is bigger than you because as long as you're making it just about you, you're keeping it small. Michael Chestnut: yeah. Yeah. J Randall Gladden: And that's who God is calling. You have listeners and you have men you you work with. God has powerful ministries, testimonies, victories He has for them for other people. That's the kingdom model. So when I I said this at a church in England about a year and a half ago. Right in the middle of speaking, I had this epiphany. And I had to stop. And it's like, Dying to self sounds horrible, right? And I had this realization, it is primarily a mental shift. Dying to self is when we get that mental shift that is it's not primarily about me. I get to enjoy some of the benefits. Dying to self is a recognition that God wants you to lift other people up in whatever Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: form He's empowered you to do it. And you get blessed in the process. But what's the focus? And that's half the battle. is when we get that shift off of us, then we can truly live to a greater degree that identity God is trying to reveal to us. Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. And wouldn't you say that's probably one of the I think one of the hardest things is removing the human side of us, especially if we've been raised a certain way of thinking, right? and that's where I believe the power of the local church and totally believe like to a lot of my listeners and to a lot of like the guys that I that I w that I work with, I I'm always pushing getting into a good men's bible group, surrounding yourself with some really godly men, J Randall Gladden: Or starting one. Michael Chestnut: or or starting one, exactly. J Randall Gladden: 'Cause it'll push you that will push you further but anyway, go ahead. Michael Chestnut: Well, no, because you you're right, because I had a I had a guy tell me one time, he said, Well, you don't understand the church that I'm at and where the place where I live, there there are no men Bible study. And I was like, And I said, What you just said, I said, then you be the one that starts it. You be the one who goes and puts that together, you know? And there's such power in that. And and there's such power in the the community of all Other men. And I was scared to death to build some of those relationships, but they have been the best relationships in my life. Allowing those men to be a part of it, rubbing elbows with them and and but also choosing wisely. and I'll be honest with you, I've been going through a health season right now, and Where me and my wife would be right now without that fellowship of them helping us, because sometimes I feel like that one the the script the dad the father in the scripture when he says, I believe but help my unbelief. Because sometimes in the midst of of these hardships, you know, the human side comes out and you're like, Is my faith strong enough? You know, is God punishing me? Is this whatever that? And I love having these other men. Who will come lift you up, pray with you, show you truth, and help you know that, hey, this is not who you are, Mike. This is not who God says you are. And to me that just increases so much J Randall Gladden: Yeah, Michael Chestnut: for me. J Randall Gladden: and and it's it's the fellowship, but and the other part is you've got to continually feed yourself the right things. And Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: you know, going back to the gentleman you were talking about, one thing is you start the group, now you have the pressure to be feeding yourself because you've got to feed others. And that that's the thing is, you know, you've got to get past the knowing about God. And you've got to get settled to where you know God yourself. Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: you know, I've got my routine. I like mornings, I'm an early morning guy. I'll be out with my coffee at, you know, 5 30 in the morning while everybody else is still in bed. And, you know, it it's that's when I like to be with God and and just even at some low points. I remember at some very low points just saying, God, you you are perfect. In your ways are always perfect, your ways towards me are perfect, even when I don't understand. And so I've got y funny nicknames for God. I call him the Majestic One. Like I'll start out a conversation. Hey, Majestic One. You know, it's like He is this amazing, and and I said it earlier, we gotta get understand how outrageously generous God is. Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: Because that will transform your approach also. That when we look at life based on our failures, our our perception of God, you know, we live in a world where you've got to earn stuff. And and and when you come to God with this idea you've got to earn something, you've already limited. What you can see, become, do, what he can do through you. And it's not that we don't, again, improve, it's not like we don't get to know him more, but we're not earning it. It's the recognition that God is, there, there's a Hebrew word of how God describes himself. And that word is Hesed. And I'm going to do a horrible job at this because this word is so powerful, we can't fully translate it. So when we say that God is full of loving kindness, that is one aspect of Hasid. Merciful, gracious, you know, long suffering. These are all aspects of Hesed. And it's it, when God says that about Himself, He's not saying, This is who I will be to you. He's saying, This is who I am. This is his identity. And he changes not. So when we come to the realization that God doesn't change. He is faithful. We don't understand everything. We don't understand, but we live in a fallen world, so we don't understand why certain things happen, why God allowed it. And and it's funny, I I remember in this battle we went through in in This lady said to me, why ask why? Because I don't know if you got caught in this, but but I you know, when we were in this battle, it's like, why, God? We we we're innocent. We haven't done anything. And I think you gotta get past for those who maybe need this, you gotta get past the why. Maybe God shows you, maybe he doesn't. Maybe at the end you look back and you realize, okay, Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: maybe you don't. It's a distraction. That's one of those things that's going to keep you spinning in circles. Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: Because if the understanding the why is the key to your I don't want say victory, but the key to your transformation, key to your getting through this, navigating, whatever, you're looking at the wrong thing. And again, Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: maybe after the fact, God shows you why. I personally believe God allows us to go through that horrible season to push me into what I'm doing now. And Michael, I will say Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: I love this more than anything I've ever done in my life. I hear people talking about retiring life. What are you talking about? I'm going to do this to the day I die. I'm so excited about it. Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: But at the same time, maybe you never know why. Job never knew why. The point is not the why. The point is God's goodness. And that God has still has a plan. We say it so flippantly: God has a plan for your life. God does. And the plan God has for your life is so much bigger and more profound than you realize. And We limit it by our identity of how we see ourselves. We limit it by the identity of how we perceive God. We limit it based on what we think God can do in a natural world. Rather than the recognition, God, you're bigger than I'll ever understand. You love me more than I'll ever understand. And Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: you've got something bigger for me than I can grasp. And I'm choosing to trust that, even if I see no evidence at the moment. Michael Chestnut: Yeah. I for me, you know, I I I went through a long period of whys and blame and all sorts of stuff. And what I came out at the end, I s I still don't have a lot of answers to things, but I have a couple truths. One truth is Yeah. J Randall Gladden: that's good. Not answers but truths. Okay. I like that. Michael Chestnut: You know, truth is he he he made my story his. And he he gave he gave it victory at the end to where now I can use it for other people to help other people. And the other truth is I I I realized could because I was a pastor's kid, I knew the performance-based Christianity very well. I knew what people expected from me. But what I was missing was the relationship with God. And I I hate that it took me Going where I went to get that relationship with God. but however, I don't know, and I don't know if this makes sense to you or not, but because of my world back then, being stuck in this performance-based Christianity and everything, I don't know that I would ever have had this relationship I have now with God had it not been for that. J Randall Gladden: I I Michael, I I look, I can say the same thing about myself. Would I have this relationship with God, this confidence? You know how to pray for my sons. More than anything I want for them, that they would not know about God. They would know God. They'd have a desire for God. Because and I like what you said. That's a br I've never heard it that way, but that's a great way to say it. We are all raised on performance Christianity. Because it's easier to tick a box. You Michael Chestnut: It is. J Randall Gladden: know, here's the checklist. If you're doing this and this and this, you're doing okay. And and and no. Now, there's stuff we do as a response to who God has called us to be, who He's made us to be. And that all sounds obvious, but you don't, when you agree though, you don't realize how much you're being driven by the performance base until you truly break through. And it's like the realization I'm not responsible for the results, God. I'm just Michael Chestnut: Yes. J Randall Gladden: responsible for what you've shown me. And what I'm supposed to do with it. And that's the thing, is I I say it differently. I like your way better. I said this to somebody one day. So I'm not religious. Now I grew up in church, but I love God passionately. And kind of my point there is, and I'm not saying everything in church is wrong. Don't, don't, and you're right, Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: you know, you don't forsake the gathering together of yourselves. You need to be challenged and empowered. But you know, I want God not the set of rules. And that sounds obvious, but how often I've seen it when someone's in crisis, they're in a challenge, even leaders, they want the checklist. Do these five things, which is why so much of you know, like in Christian leadership, there's so many books. And what is it? It's the checklist. Well, it's what worked for you. And I I can all but guarantee it won't work as well for them. Why? Because God wants a relationship. He doesn't want a checklist. Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: This is really cool. If you get a chance for your listeners, go study Deuteronomy 31:3. So here's the context. Moses is getting them ready to finally go in and take possession of what God has for them. And God has promised over and over, I've given you this land. And there's three aspects in that one verse. And the first two make it sound easy. God says, I am going before you myself. Okay. I will defeat every enemy, cool, and you will possess it. So that kind of sounds easy, but it's understanding how the process works. When God took them through the wilderness, he sent the angel in front of them to literally to guard them, to make sure they got to the intended destination in every sense of that word. We don't have time to break it all the way down. And God defeating the enemies doesn't say the battle doesn't happen. He says to Joshua, no one will be able to stand against you all the Michael Chestnut: Mm. J Randall Gladden: days of your life. But you still got to show up for the fight and possessing it. So here's the cool part. And that's not in that, but you, you know, it's really worthwhile to understand that process of how God gives you the victory. You got to recognize God's with you and leading you, even when you don't see it. Number two, he's gonna give you the victory, no matter how big that giant is. But you have to possess it. So here's the cool part. If you think about in the kingdom, inheritance, those are the things. So when God gave the Israelites the promised land, that was their inheritance. Inheritance is bigger than you. In our culture, you're a recipient. You get the inheritance, you do what you want with. In the kingdom, you're a beneficiary. And here's the difference: it came with expectations that you're supposed to improve it, increase it. It's supposed to be a blessing for the whole community. And you get to enjoy the benefits. But it's supposed to be even better when it goes to the next generation. That's the framework. Now here's the thing: because of the fallen nature of the world, we think of when God makes a promise that it should just happen. But because of the fallen nature of the world we live in, it will automatically resist. So literally, when it talks about possessing, there's two aspects. One is treading, it's pushing it down into agreement with what God says. And possessing means to literally lay hold of. What God has said He's given you. So you have the legal rights to it, but you have to possess it. And again, we don't have time to really go into that, but hopefully that'll spark people to realize how often we become passive. So we either fall into the performance. Here's my checklist that I meet everything. And the vast majority of the time I really blew it on item number three. So then I gotta start all over. Or we're passive. God is all powerful, He's all knowing, He loves me, He's got good for me. I'm just waiting. And God is saying, I need you to go possess it. Well, God, I don't know how. I don't. The first step is, so here's the other side, understanding faith. Faith is not just agreeing with God, it comes with the implied aspect of movement, taking action. But I Michael Chestnut: Mm-hmm. J Randall Gladden: don't know what the action is. Well, then what's that first action? You do what Michael did. You start quoting the promises. Michael Chestnut: Right. J Randall Gladden: Then you let the Holy Spirit draw your attention to some step, some action that you are literally demonstrating. I'm owning this. God, you said it, I'm owning it. I'm carrying it around in my pocket. I that's mine. You said it to me. Don't know how. I don't see how it can work. I don't see any evidence. I don't see progress. But you are faithful. You cannot deny yourself. I am. And God, if I'm not possessing it perfectly, that's okay because grace covers me. You will continually show me by the leading Michael Chestnut: Hmm. J Randall Gladden: of the Holy Spirit how to possess this more perfectly, better, until I see it as a manifestation of my life. And more importantly, it's the recognition that in the process it's supposed to bless other people too. It's not just for me. Going back to full circle. Everything God gives us is bigger than us. And I think that's one of the things our culture undermines is Michael Chestnut: Yeah. J Randall Gladden: everything we see is focused on us and our enjoyment. And don't get me wrong, I'm a huge fan. People will tell you, you know, Michael, one of my sayings is go have some fun and take somebody with you. You know, Michael Chestnut: Yep. J Randall Gladden: but at the same time, it's got to be bigger than you. Michael Chestnut: Yep. And I I I'll be honest, there's nothing I like better than when God shows up and shows up and does something that J Randall Gladden: Yeah. Michael Chestnut: only He can do. And I and I love that, you know, and I've seen that in my restoration period because there have been so many things. I'm I was like, God, I this will never happen. Well no, not not with the way I'm talking, it will never happen. So I got some great advice and started changing how I was praying and how I was thinking. And then all of a sudden I started seeing God restoring relationships and things that I never thought possible. And he did it in ways I couldn't I could not even imagine would work. But that that's the beauty of it. And I think God, I think God loved God loved those moments where he said, Mike, look, look. J Randall Gladden: I got this. Michael Chestnut: Yeah. And for me, the beauty of knowing that in those moments the God of the universe was smiling down on me, saying, I love you. And all those other things that I kept s had said for years about who I was, those just helped reidify that those were lies. You know? So it was great. Listen, Randall, it's been so good to have you on our show today. in fact, J Randall Gladden: thanks for having me. This has been awesome. Michael Chestnut: I in fact I I I'll probably reach out to you again sometime here in the near future because we we didn't even haven't even touched the hem of his garment on the on the subject. But before we go, I know you've written some books, got an app, some things. What are what are some tools out there that maybe some of our guys could utilize? J Randall Gladden: Yeah, so you know, as you know, my passion is seeing people become and live out what God has for them. So we have membership on a website, God powered. It's goddash power dot com. And you can find my books there. They're typically four or five bucks. You know, I make them all electronic, I want to make them accessible. We also have a membership. For those who are interested, twice a week, Mondays and Thursdays, I publish content, whether it's videos, articles, books, etc. to continually challenge you to understand identity, empowerment, and purpose and keep you moving down that path that that you don't get stagnant. So for those who are interested, it's like I said, it's $10 a month. But we also have a free app. So if you go into any app store, it's God powered, don't put God powered, you get all kinds of weird stuff. God powered. And it's twofold. One, from members, you get all the members content. You can take it with you on the go, but there's also free content. One of the things I do every Sunday, is I do a power truth. Okay. And a power truth is a verse that you've got to get in your spirit. Not just know it. You've got to get it. So the idea is for a week to challenge you. So the the format is a verse, but understanding it. So this week's like yesterday's from when we're recording power truth is faith made perfect. James says that Abraham's faith was made perfect by his works. That word perfect is not just complete, but it also Produced its intended results, how it impacts others, that God is calling you to literally work, which is the very same sh word going back to Adam in the garden to tend, it's worship. When you're doing it unto the Lord, it's a form of worship. So anyway, that's something it's free that that we publish every every Sunday. So yeah, the God-powered app is free. Go check out our website. There's content, some is free, we've got some books. If you're interested in the membership, we'd love to have you. But you made a comment, and I want to just throw one thing out before we close. you know, I know that you work with men, and so I want to give you a little something for them. So God says to Joshua, chapter one, they're getting ready to go in to lay hold of the promised land. To possess what God had promised them. And there's all these challenges. Okay. In the natural, that's why that first generation failed. In the natural, looked impossible. All these armies, bigger than us, greater than us, etc. And God says to Joshua, be strong and of good courage. Now, here's the thing we have to understand. Strong, you can't just make yourself strong immediately. So what does that mean? What that meant, that word strong means, to continually cling to God's goodness, his character, his how do you make yourself strong? It's not a physical thing. It's not a positive mental attitude. It literally means to continually, it literally means to cling. Cling to God's goodness, his promise, his character. And a great example of it is later, David has been anointed to be king. He's been on the hot run. And then they come back, and the Amalekites have attacked and taken everything. And what they couldn't take, they burned. I mean, there's nothing left but Ash. And his men are so distraught, they're actually talking about killing him. And, you know. So David despaired, and here's what is cool. It says, before he asked God what to do, it says, David strengthened himself in the Lord. Then he asked, What do I do? It's that same idea. What did he do? At that low moment, he had to cling to who God was, what he said, his goodness. And that gave him, it wasn't like God saying, I'm going to give you everything is going to be recovered. Which is what happened. No, no, that wasn't the strengthening. That's where we we want God to say it's going to be great, it's going to be better than you imagined. And that's cool. But the strengthening is clinging to God, his goodness, his promises, even at that lowest point. And by the way, not only did they recover all, they gained so much more. Dave was able to bless all the places that had given them refuge over the years. What looked like Devastation, God turned into a massive blessing, despite the fact it looked impossible. But the foundation was David strengthened himself in the Lord. So if if I left one thing today, hopefully is that get that in your spirit. No matter what, good day, bad day, worst moment you can imagine. How do you strengthen yourself in the Lord? It's not a positive God's good. You got to cling to who he is. His goodness, his character, and his promises. That's where your real strength will come from. Michael Chestnut: Hmm. Thank you so much. Thank you, Randall, for that. And I I tell ya, I have been blessed today very much with all of this. So thank you so J Randall Gladden: Thank you. Michael Chestnut: much for being on here. J Randall Gladden: Thanks for having me. This has been fun. I I you know, I Michael Chestnut: Is it J Randall Gladden: seriously, Michael, I'm gonna I'm gonna make a request. Invite me again. This was fun. Let's do it again. Michael Chestnut: I would love to. I would love to have you on here again. In fact, we'll we'll talk about we got a 200th episode coming up. that might be a great one to to to spin off on. But you know, we'll we will definitely be looking at it. God actually has ordained this moment and thank you. Thank you for reaching out. And to my listeners, so next time, I just want to ask you, just keep being intentional. We'll see you next time here on the intentional guy.