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You Can’t Feel Love: Understanding Emotional Disconnect · A Capture Deep Vibs A Positive Space For Inspiration And Embracing Of Heart

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  Speaker 1: Someone commented, I know you won't see this, but I
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  Speaker 1: need a video of why I can't feel love in
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  Speaker 1: any sort of way. It's left me damaged and irritated
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  Speaker 1: more times than I can count, and I've just felt
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  Speaker 1: so alone watching everyone else get into relationships all around me.
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  Speaker 1: I've had one relationship in my life, and that only
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  Speaker 1: lasted for a week, and I wasn't really feeling any
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  Speaker 1: sort of love, I just thought the relationship would maybe
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  Speaker 1: open my eyes to it. Nothing I've tried has worked.
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  Speaker 1: Just please make a video about this. We're here to
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  Speaker 1: answer your question. What is it that they have that
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  Speaker 1: I don't? I feel like I'm missing something. Like I'm
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  Speaker 1: not just missing love, I'm missing the ability to love.
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  Speaker 1: I've been in relationships before, but felt empty the whole time.
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  Speaker 1: The emotional and mental whirlwind that follows can be dizzying.
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  Speaker 1: Sometimes I think I just haven't found the right person.
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  Speaker 1: Maybe I'm just too distracted by my other pursuits. What
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  Speaker 1: if I'm a psychopath? Hang on right there. This rabbit
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  Speaker 1: hole has just gone in the wrong direction. Let's look
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  Speaker 1: at some real reasons you feel numb to love. 1.
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  Speaker 1: Practicing love doesn't work. You might be tempted to get
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  Speaker 1: into a relationship with someone just because you believe it's
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  Speaker 1: the right thing to do. You can't grow those feelings
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  Speaker 1: out of nowhere. Relationships take work, and loving them makes
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  Speaker 1: it worth it. If you don't love someone at the
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  Speaker 1: beginning of the relationship, it is almost certainly not going
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  Speaker 1: to last. You can teach yourself to be more generous, patient,
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  Speaker 1: and caring, but you can't teach yourself to love. That
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  Speaker 1: just isn't how it works. In the end, as you
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  Speaker 1: might already know, dating someone you don't love can only
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  Speaker 1: end in pain for them. If you feel numb to love,
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  Speaker 1: it might be because you're trying to force yourself to
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  Speaker 1: love someone that you don't. Number two, it's not a
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  Speaker 1: good time. You might be at a difficult stage in
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  Speaker 1: your life right now, not just with everything going on outside,
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  Speaker 1: but inside as well. Our hormones can make our minds
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  Speaker 1: a pretty confusing place. If you're a teenager or a
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  Speaker 1: young adult and you already believe you're incapable of feeling love,
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  Speaker 1: Don't worry about it too much. It's just a matter
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  Speaker 1: of timing. Right now, your body and mind are a
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  Speaker 1: little at odds with each other. You might be feeling
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  Speaker 1: a yearning to be with someone. You know in your
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  Speaker 1: heart and your head that you don't really love anyone. One,
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  Speaker 1: you are not crazy. You don't have to be in
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  Speaker 1: love right now. That's okay. That goes for everyone. You
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  Speaker 1: don't have to be in love with anyone. Adults aren't
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  Speaker 1: immune to the psychological effects of hormones. It's common to
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  Speaker 1: feel all of this again later on in life, right
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  Speaker 1: when we think we have a good grip on who
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  Speaker 1: we are. Number three. Difficulty Relating Rather Than Loving Your
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  Speaker 1: problem might not be that you're numb to love, but
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  Speaker 1: rather that you can't relate to anyone around you. If
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  Speaker 1: you've noticed that you struggle to feel and show love
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  Speaker 1: to those around you, maybe you just don't actually like
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  Speaker 1: them as much as you think you should. When it
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  Speaker 1: comes to love, it takes more than just a few
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  Speaker 1: shared interests. If you feel numb to love, check if
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  Speaker 1: there is a good foundation for love to thrive. A
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  Speaker 1: good foundation for love can be built on having similar worldviews,
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  Speaker 1: similar values, and complementary personalities. Even if you have all that,
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  Speaker 1: if the feeling just isn't there, that's okay too. Sometimes
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  Speaker 1: we fall in love with the wrong people, and sometimes
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  Speaker 1: we don't love the right people. If you feel like
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  Speaker 1: you want to love someone, that means you're capable of loving.
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  Speaker 1: Sometimes we just get in our own way. Number four,
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  Speaker 1: getting in your own way. A lot of ancient writers
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  Speaker 1: spin stories about self-fulfilling prophecies. We find ourselves in the
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  Speaker 1: situations we want to avoid by trying to avoid them.
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  Speaker 1: Imagine there is a prophecy that you will be alone.
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  Speaker 1: So you never try to get with someone you love
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  Speaker 1: because you know that whether it be through a breakup,
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  Speaker 1: a divorce, or even death, the end won't be pretty.
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  Speaker 1: The problem now is that you're lonely anyway. It's common
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  Speaker 1: for people to avoid relationships and love, believing that they
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  Speaker 1: are avoiding heartbreak. This logical fallacy can stem from depression.
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  Speaker 1: If you have depression, you may already struggle with relationships
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  Speaker 1: and feeling deserving of love. If that sounds like you,
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  Speaker 1: maybe you aren't numb to love but a little bit
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  Speaker 1: numb to a lot of positive things. Number five, dysfunctions
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  Speaker 1: in primary relationships. If you were truly numb to love,
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  Speaker 1: you would struggle to feel it for and from family
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  Speaker 1: and friends as well. As we established, depression and depressive
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  Speaker 1: conditions can make you think you're incapable of being loved,
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  Speaker 1: but you still need the attention of your parents and
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  Speaker 1: the camaraderie of your friends. If you care about your
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  Speaker 1: family or friends, if you want to spend time with
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  Speaker 1: them at all, that should tell you that you have
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  Speaker 1: love inside you. Developing, maintaining, and cultivating your non-romantic relationships
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  Speaker 1: can better prepare you for a romantic relationship and help
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  Speaker 1: you feel more secure in both non-romantic and romantic relationships.
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  Speaker 1: Try not to compare yourself to others. Love comes naturally,
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  Speaker 1: so don't try to force it. When love does come,
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  Speaker 1: allow yourself to feel it. In the meantime, if you
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  Speaker 1: feel numb to love, love those around you and love
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  Speaker 1: your friends and family as much as you can. If
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  Speaker 1: the numbness persists, we encourage you to seek the opinion
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  Speaker 1: and help of a professional for more specific advice. We
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  Speaker 1: want you to live your best life and that includes
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  Speaker 1: feeling loved. If you found this video helpful, please leave
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  Speaker 1: a like and subscribe to Psych2Go for more videos like this.
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  Speaker 1: You got this.