Latest / Straight Up Extra Dirty's Podcast / EP 28 - Straight Up. 🍸 Extra Dirty: Red, White & Extra Dirty

Transcript

EP 28 - Straight Up. 🍸 Extra Dirty: Red, White & Extra Dirty · Straight Up Extra Dirty's Podcast

• 0:22
  SPEAKER_04: I haven't spoken to her now.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_04: Well, she did say she was working on a surprise for you.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_04: A surprise?
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_04: A surprise.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: Woo! Yes! Well, what do you think?
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_01: Am I ready for the barbecue?
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_03: What the hell are you wearing?
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_03: This is not the Dallas Cowboy cheerleader.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_03: What are you talking about?
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_03: Tryouts.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_03: What do you mean?
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_03: It's the 4th of July.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_03: It's our 250-year anniversary.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_03: 250-year anniversary for what?
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_03: 250 years America's birthday.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: That's really but yeah, but what's the matter with this?
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_01: I'm wearing the the blue, the white, and I got the red and I got the bigger.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: Alright.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, I'm not a grill master here, so this is not my thing.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what's going on here?
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, it's America's birthday, so we gotta do the grill thing, you know?
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_04: We got hamburgers, we got hot dogs.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: And a lot of smoke coming out.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_04: A lot of smoke coming out.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_01: So America is 250 years old?
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_04: America is 250 years old.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_04: Can you believe it?
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_04: We lasted.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, well, like I I I know that now, but like now we're doing like a barbecue, like friends, family.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: I know this is like the big time, everybody's together.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_01: Like, so what would what would your scenario be for somebody to get banned from a bar from your barbecue?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_04: Besides the small family barbecues.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_04: Let's see.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I don't know, pretty much nothing offends me.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_04: I come from a kind of like an all-American like household, so you know, we're used to like doing keg stands and you know getting rowdy.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_04: On 4th of July.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_04: Always on the 4th of July.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_01: When I so when I was growing up, my uncle Tommy's birthday was on 4th of July.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: And so every so growing up, I thought it was just my uncle's birthday.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't realize, like, as a little kid, I didn't know what 4th of July meant other than fireworks and getting shot at by my cousins.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: Because I was the only female cousin at the time, you know, like I was the only like first cousin that was a girl.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody were boys.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: So then my other cousins, we all got together and they used to chase us down the block with bottle rockets and shoot M80s off.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, it was insane.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_04: That's how we do too.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_01: That was Long Island, it was crazy.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: So I associate Fourth of July with my Uncle Tommy's birthday.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_04: So now, so tell me, tell me if you could do shots with any American president, who would it be?
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it could be Teddy.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_01: It could be Teddy Roosevelt.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_01: Why Teddy?
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: I just think it's.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_01: He sounds cuddly.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: No, he's just kind of like a man of wisdom.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I just like, but if I was gonna go modern day, I'd wanna, I'd probably wanna like have drinks with JFK.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_01: I want to hear all the dirt.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_01: I would get him so I would be like, let's have a couple of things.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_04: I think I'd do a lot more with JFK than drink with him.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: Well, well, who would you want to have drinks with?
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_01: Do you want me to try to do that?
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_04: I wanna say, like, I wanna say Clinton, because I'd probably ask him like all about the stain on the dress of the book.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: Well, wouldn't you want to ask Monica about that?
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_01: Didn't he say I did not have sexual relations with that woman?
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_04: Come on now.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna do the record off the record, like, off the record with Bill.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_04: Like you're having drinks at a barbecue with Bill, like you say, hey, like, you know, what's what's Hillary's deal with this?
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_04: Why did Hillary stay so quiet?
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, she's not the type to sit silently, so no, she's not.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_04: It's crazy that she sat silent and didn't say anything during this whole thing, so you know.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I do have a little confession to make about presidents.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_01: I I don't want to say I had a crush because he's so old, but I thought that George Bush, George W.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_01: Bush, George W.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_04: Bush, not not senior?
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_01: Not senior, the president.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_01: The other president.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: They were both presidents.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_01: The second president, the second president.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_01: I thought that he, I I think I still think he's a very handsome man.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe, you know, like I just thought that he was a man of power, distinguished, from Texas.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: Not just not not saying that because I'm dressed like a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader, but I'm just saying, like, I don't know.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: I got a lot, like I would love to sit down and shoot with him.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I really would.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_01: I would love to sit and like, you know, do burgers and stuff with him.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_01: What do you think?
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_04: All right.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_04: So, what's your opinion on ketchup on a hot dog?
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_01: That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard in my entire life.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_04: I heard that like after you turn 12, that it's inappropriate.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't even appropriate at 12, okay?
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't appropriate before 12.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_01: Why do you not like ketchup?
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: I like ketchup, but it doesn't belong.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's like it it does not, it's like gravy belonging on like meatballs.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: It's not the same.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: Gravy is not I know.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_01: We're not gonna get into that.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: But I'm saying that hot dogs, like it's mustard.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: And I grew up on Long Island, so they had Nathan's hot dogs, so they had a little bit of the relish on there, so like you could only have Nathan's hot dogs.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: I don't like sauerkraut, but I like the ones from Nathan's though.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: Do you have like so?
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't like these, these are like too thick.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: I like the long skinny ones.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_04: These are fing thin.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: I don't no, not the ones.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_01: I like the Sabrette.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: Remember Sabrette?
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_04: I do like Sabret, yeah.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: Sabrette and and Nathan's had the best dogs.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_04: So these are organic ones.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_04: I don't like all that crap.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_04: What do you mean organic?
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_04: You're gonna keep the yeah.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: Wait, what do you mean by organic?
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: What do you mean by organic?
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: How do you have an organic hot dog?
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_04: It's organic, it's not made from processed meat.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_04: Then what's in up grown people in that dog?
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_04: It's just like a normal.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_04: How about your burgers?
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_04: The burgers are.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: If you're getting to like the turkey burger, like I think it should be all be.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, are you with me on that?
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, good.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_01: So at least we agree on that.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_04: Turkey burger is a different ball game, but it's not a real burger.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_04: It's just the turkey patty.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_04: It's a very different very different.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_03: And that should be banned from football.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_03: So, what is your favorite American pastime?
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_01: Football, dude.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, and baseball is a good answer.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_01: That's a very good answer.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_01: And baseball.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: And baseball.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a Yankee fan.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_01: And baseball.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a Yankee fan.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_01: So, what about you?
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_04: I would say I would have said football.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_04: Football is definitely the best answer.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_04: I love football.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_04: And and I guess baseball's, you're right too.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_01: Like growing up, it was like a whole thing with my grandfather, like literally with the So I will say the only time I would eat a hot dog, the only time you'll see me maybe twice a year eat a hot dog.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: And it's always it's at Yankee Stadium.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_01: Or at Yankee Stadium.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: I will I eat a hot dog at Yankee Stadium or MetLife Stadium where the Giants play.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_01: Even though I'm wearing a Dallas Cowboy looking outfit, just remember the Giants are also blue and white.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_01: But I will eat a hot dog at a football game and I'll be.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's the only reason why.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_01: I'm also getting smoked out.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: Sorry.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_01: So what's like the protocol?
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what else do you add to like your grill?
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what like I I'm not a grill person.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_01: I can't grill for s.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_01: I can cook up a storm, but I can everything I do I burn on a grill.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: So how are you making these burgers?
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_04: I feel like when it comes to the grill, I I grill everything on it.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_04: I I do fish, I do vegetables, but not on America's birthday.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_04: On America's birthday, I like ribs, I like brisket, I like What about your side dishes?
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_04: Side dishes gotta do a potato salad.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_01: I love potato salad.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_04: Wait, what kind?
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like there's German, there's like whatever, like German.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's like German potato salad.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know what that means.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, German's warm.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_01: It's gotta be cold.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_01: Mine's gotta be cold and crisp.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_04: I like a cold potato salad.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_01: Do you like coleslaw?
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_04: What about fireworks?
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_01: I'm definitely afraid of spawn.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: I talk when I was a kid, I was chased with bottle rockets.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_01: They used to shoot them down the street at me.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: My cousins were, they were, they were just mean.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like my boy, I like I grew up with a lot of boy cousins, and they would just torture me.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: I am deathly afraid.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_01: I like to see them in the sky far away, but I don't want to be close to a freaking firework.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: I just don't.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: Like Gruochie on Long Island, they would shoot them off in the middle of the water.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: That looked beautiful.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_04: I caught fire one time.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_04: I was actually on Deerfield Beach and I had this knitted sweater on it.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_04: It wasn't cold, but it was like uh the the knit was really wide.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_04: It was a female sweater, but it was had like a like I think the company was called Firefox or something like that.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_04: Had all these big red uh white stars and it was red.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_04: And I was sitting on the beach and this firework went off, and it was really breezy that day.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_04: And literally, the breeze blew, and a cinder came down and landed on my sweater, and I caught fire.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: How did you get out of that?
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_04: Everybody jumped on me.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_04: Dude, I'm afraid of- I was on the beach!
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: I'm afraid of spray- you know those um sparkles?
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm afraid of sparkles.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like they scare the s of me.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_01: Birthday candles that look like they're exploding scares the sht out of me.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's like it triggers something from my childhood.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_04: But like if you if you saw America in 250 years, where do you think we'd be?
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: Oh god, I hope we're still on the earth.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: That's all I could say.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_01: America?
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: I hope that I don't know.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_01: 250 years from now?
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_01: I don't really have an answer for that.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: I have no idea.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_01: Where do you think we you see us?
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I I mean, I know where I'd like to see us, but I don't know if we'd get there.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_04: I feel like the United States of America is not united.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_04: Well, right now we're a little bit not united.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_04: And you know a little?
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_04: A little bit not united.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_04: But I will say this that like we are still one of the best places on the earth to best countries in the world to live.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_04: It's still a land of opportunity, it's still a land of freedom.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_04: We can still say when we don't like things.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_04: You know, and some countries they cut your tongue out for that.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: That's true.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm proud to be an American, and I've traveled outside of this country, and some some of the countries I've traveled to are not big fans of ours.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, you know what?
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_01: I'm proud to be an American.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_01: I don't give a but I just feel like I I don't know.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: I just hope we can get to a better place.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_04: I think it just starts at at home, and you know, doing stuff like this, like having a barbecue, is kind of it's kind of like a a great all-American like way to connect.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: Do you think people understand that it's America's birthday?
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like, or is it just a day off from work and everybody gets together and drinks beer and eats hot dogs and really big burgers and really big dogs?
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what do you think?
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: Really big job.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, uh it would be four in my book, it would be Fourth of July every weekend.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_01: By the way, I would like to be.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_04: I would like to pick up one of these dogs.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_04: These are not jumbo.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: That is big.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_04: This is an average American hot dog.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: No, that is big.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_04: Thank you very much.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, the long ones, the ones that snap.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, I love the ones that snap.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_04: That's like legit.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_04: Like, that's made with like the actual casing and everything.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: What about pickles?
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_01: Pickles on a burger or no?
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_04: I love pickles.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: Let me see.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_04: I love pickles.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_04: I actually do like pickles, but I only like a a half sour.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_04: I don't like a I'm the same way.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_03: I don't like a I do you like it on your burger?
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_03: I don't really like it on my burger.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_04: Do I?
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_04: Alright, we agree on something.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_04: I love a good like like uh I like a lot of things on my burger, but like definitely pickles is not like on the list of stuff that I would I don't know.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_01: So I grew up in New York, and you know, we had burgers, lettuce, tomato, onion, and ketchup, right?
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_01: I would come down and visit Florida.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_01: You live in Florida, you grew up in Florida, and you guys have on yours all that, but you have mustard, mayo, and um ketchup.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: I cannot eat a burger anymore without those three things on it.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: The ketchup, the mayo, and the mustard.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: Honestly, I thought it was a southern thing.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_01: Is it?
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I think it is.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_04: For me, like mayo and ketchup mixed gives me the vibe of like the sauce at Chick-fil-A.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_01: Well, Chick-fil-A wasn't Chick-fil-A back when I was a kid.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: Chick-fil-a's been around for a long time.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_04: Not that I'm old, because we're not gonna get into that again, but you're not as old as America.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: What do you normally do for what do you normally do for Fourth of July?
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: Do you light all fireworks?
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_04: So I do not like fireworks.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_04: I am not a huge firework person.
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: Do you put cheese on your burgers?
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_04: I do put cheese on my burger.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_01: When do you put the cheese on?
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_04: Usually this last minute, but you know, we left it inside, so maybe we can ask Michael if we have any cheese.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like Michael, well, Michael's gonna come out and eat, so.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_04: Where the hell is Michael?
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_01: Where is your husband?
• 14:29
  unknown: He burned my burger.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, Michael.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't burn it! Cheese, Michael, where's the cheese for it?
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: Michael doesn't like things.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_04: Michael doesn't not like things for flavor oils.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_02: I would have any more cheese.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_02: Are you serious?
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_00: You're a midnight cheese snacker?
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: Dude, I'll eat crackers, I'll eat chips.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: You might even see me eat a cookie, but I would never look to eat cheese.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_02: A slice of cheese.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: Like, oh, let me have a slice of cheese in the middle of the night.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like, who craves cheese like that?
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_01: Why not?
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_02: I have a surprise for both of you.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_02: But I'm putting you to the test for America's 250th birthday.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_02: Go America.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_02: You have to answer some trivia questions.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, boy.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_02: If you get them all right, you're good.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_02: If you get any wrong, you gotta jump in that pool right there.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_02: You gotta pray you get these answers right for the American.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_02: We're gonna get it wrong.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_02: You just want us to go in the pool.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_01: He just wants to see you near.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_01: First question.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: You don't want to see me near.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_01: First question.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_02: What year was the Declaration of Independence signs?
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_01: 1776.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: Alright.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_02: Good.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_02: And either of you can answer, because you're both on the line for this.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_02: I'll give you another easy one.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, that I can't.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_02: Who was our first president?
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_01: Washington.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_02: George Washington.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_01: George.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, okay.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_02: There's only been one.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, is there another question?
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_02: Trick question.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_02: All right.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_02: Next question.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_02: How many stripes are on our beautiful flag?
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_02: Oh girl.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_01: Can we take a couple of guesses?
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_02: You have two guesses.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_02: I'll give you a hint.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_02: Very good.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_02: 13.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_02: 13.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_02: Do you know why 13?
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_02: That was the number of money.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no, did not.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_01: I did know.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_02: All right, all right, all right.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_02: Who is on the$100 pen?
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_02: Ben.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_02: Ben what?
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_02: Benjamin Franklin.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_02: All right.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_04: Benjamin Franklin.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_02: So Ben Franklin was not a president of the United States.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_02: There is another person on our currency that was also not a president of the United States.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_02: Adams?
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_01: No, Adams was a president.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_02: You know the other person.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_01: Who's on a$2 bill?
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my gosh.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_02: It's not him.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_02: A famous Broadway show.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, oh.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_01: Hamlet.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: Hamlet.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_01: Hamlet.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_01: Hamlet.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: Hamlet.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: Hamilton.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: Hamlet.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: You're Hamilton.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_01: Hamilton is an animal pool.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: Hamilton.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_02: Alright, alright, you're good.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_02: He's going in the pool.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_02: Guess what?
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not going to pool.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not getting my hair messed up.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_02: No, you got it.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_02: You guys.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_02: Are we tied?
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_02: You're tied.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_02: You are true.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_02: Should I do a tiebreaker?
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, tiebreaker.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_02: Last question.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_02: Last question.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_02: You did not win.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_02: Alright.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I gotta find a good one for you.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_02: Alright.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_02: What is the smallest state in the nation?
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_04: Rhode Island.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_01: Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding! I'm not going to the jump in the pool, baby.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_02: Jump in the pool.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_02: Should I jump in for you?
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_04: I need you to get the cheese, motherfucker.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_04: There is no cheese.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_02: You ate it all.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: You just said you ate all the goddamn cheese.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: Who eats all the cheese when you know you do the burgers on freaking 4th of July?
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_00: Who eats the cheese?
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_00: Who eats the cheese?
• 18:09
  unknown: Mikey.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, what kind of cheese was it?
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_01: Wait, I want to know what kind of cheese it is.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_01: All right, all right, all right.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Michael.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_01: Woo!
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_04: On that note.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_04: On that note.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_04: Happy birthday, America! Happy birthday, America! 150 years and on the way out.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_04: But you know what's missing though.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_01: We've got the burgers, we got the dogs.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_02: Where's the beer?
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: No, where's the beer?
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_02: Where's something?
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_01: Where's the beer?
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_04: The beer.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_04: What you got?
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_04: Girl, I don't know who you're talking to, but what the hell is this?
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_03: This is a celebration.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_03: Hello.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_02: Some booze.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_02: It's a celebration.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_03: We don't do beer in this house.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_03: We do the booze.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_04: We're never 250 years to America.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_04: We gotta celebrate.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_04: Michael, can you crack that up for me?
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_01: We're American.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_01: Beer is American.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_01: We're drinking French.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_01: Well, they helped us to win.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_03: I missed that history.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_03: They did help us to win.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you, France.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_01: Oh boy.
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_01: That's what she says.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_01: So note yourself is never to have a cool glass of champagne next to the I'm gonna drink it out of the bottle.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_01: Michael drink it out of the bottle.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_01: All right, kids.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_01: So here's to the fourth of July, straight up extra dirty.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_01: And two hundred and fifty years of America.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_04: Happy birthday, America.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, America.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Francis.