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#HURDLEMOMENT: 6 Habits Of Happy People · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

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  Speaker 1: Hurdlers. Emily Abody here with a brand new hurdle Moment
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  Speaker 1: for the smaller obstacles we're all facing on the regular
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  Speaker 1: each and every day. I am fresh off the plane
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  Speaker 1: from London, and I've got to be honest, I am exhausted.
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  Speaker 1: This is the first trip in a really long time
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  Speaker 1: that has absolutely nothing to do with work and just
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  Speaker 1: a lot of touristing and marathon spectating and a lot
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  Speaker 1: of eating. And it was a blast. But I am
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  Speaker 1: ready to be back in the New York groove. This
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  Speaker 1: week for Hurdle Moment, I'm chatting about habits for happiness.
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  Speaker 1: These are just some practices that I've adopted over the
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  Speaker 1: past couple of years that help me keep a positive
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  Speaker 1: outlook even on the days where I'm not exactly feeling
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  Speaker 1: like my best self. If you have some strategies of
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  Speaker 1: your own, I'd love to hear about them. You know
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  Speaker 1: the drill at Hurdle podcasts on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook,
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  Speaker 1: and don't forget to keep those Hurdle Moment topic suggestions
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  Speaker 1: come in my way. You can always reach me over email.
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  Speaker 1: It's Emily at hurdle dot com US. And with that,
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  Speaker 1: let's get this week's hurtle moment. Bad days happen something
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  Speaker 1: as simple as tripping on your way to the bathroom
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  Speaker 1: in the morning, or forgetting your coffee tumble on the
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  Speaker 1: kitchen counter when you're leaving to go to the office.
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  Speaker 1: They can totally throw off your vibe for the rest
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  Speaker 1: of the day. Over the last few years, though, I've
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  Speaker 1: managed to home in on some ways to keep smiling
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  Speaker 1: even when I feel frustrated or tired, or whatever the
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  Speaker 1: case may be. Granted, these are strategies that work for me,
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  Speaker 1: but hopefully they can work for you too, all right.
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  Speaker 1: Habit Number one, be your authentic self. We say this
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  Speaker 1: time and time again. Social media can really be toxic.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, depending on what your rules are for keeping
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  Speaker 1: your phone near or around your bedroom. Pretty much from
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  Speaker 1: the second we wake up in the morning, we are
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  Speaker 1: bombarded with images of what other people are doing, and
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  Speaker 1: it becomes super easy to compare yourself to others people.
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  Speaker 1: What I've come to realize is that both on social
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  Speaker 1: media and off social media, the best thing that you
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  Speaker 1: can do is be you be your authentic self. There's
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  Speaker 1: no point in wasting your energy trying to be someone
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  Speaker 1: or something that you're not. Now. Granted, I think there
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  Speaker 1: are a couple of different exercises that I've done personally
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  Speaker 1: over the last couple of years that have helped me
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  Speaker 1: figure out who I am, at least to an extent. Right.
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  Speaker 1: I talked about this in the first Hurtle Moment, writing
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  Speaker 1: down the things that bring me joy in my life,
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  Speaker 1: or narrowing in on what my values are. It wasn't
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  Speaker 1: something that I sat down one morning and I was like,
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  Speaker 1: these are my values. But instead what I did was
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  Speaker 1: I really thought about the things that are important to me,
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  Speaker 1: and by writing these things down, by taking the time
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  Speaker 1: to put in the work, I learned about me. Every
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  Speaker 1: day we're learning something new about ourselves, but doing small
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  Speaker 1: exercises like this help me identify what's important to me
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  Speaker 1: and give me a nudge to stay on that path.
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  Speaker 1: When you're your most authentic self, you attract the people
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  Speaker 1: that you're meant to attract, which actually brings me to
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  Speaker 1: my next important habit, surround yourself with good people. I
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  Speaker 1: honestly think that this has been one of the biggest
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  Speaker 1: lessons I've learned in my adult life, is that people
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  Speaker 1: come and go. Everyone that comes into your life at
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  Speaker 1: one point or another, they have a different role to
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  Speaker 1: play and each of these people can teach you something,
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  Speaker 1: and sometimes in relationships just feel like too much effort.
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  Speaker 1: It's okay to let them go. We are constantly evolving
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  Speaker 1: and with that, so do our relationships. It takes a
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  Speaker 1: really big person to let someone play a certain role
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  Speaker 1: in their life when they might have hoped that they
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  Speaker 1: would play a different one. But we hear it all
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  Speaker 1: the time. Right, you are a combination of the five
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  Speaker 1: people that you surround yourself with the most. That means
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  Speaker 1: that every single day you have the opportunity to cultivate
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  Speaker 1: your squad to make sure that the people that you're
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  Speaker 1: spending the most time with actually are lifting you up,
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  Speaker 1: that they're faucets not drains. If you're hanging out with
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  Speaker 1: someone that might be a little bit toxic, ask yourself,
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  Speaker 1: why what is it that you're looking for from that
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  Speaker 1: relationship and is it really serving a purpose? Think of
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  Speaker 1: it this way. If you're constantly surrounding yourself with someone
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  Speaker 1: who eats a lot, then you're probably going to eat
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  Speaker 1: a lot. If you are surrounding yourself with someone who's
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  Speaker 1: a go getter, someone that has the same values that
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  Speaker 1: you do. These are shared qualities. These are things that
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  Speaker 1: are going to make you both better. The next habit,
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  Speaker 1: get enough sleep. Plain and simple, happy people make sleep
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  Speaker 1: a priority. No one that is living their best life
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  Speaker 1: is running on three hours of sleep. And anyone who's
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  Speaker 1: promoting that constant hustle, no rest situation, I don't know.
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  Speaker 1: It just doesn't scream happy vibes to me. I truly
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  Speaker 1: believe that your energy, attention, memory, all of these things
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  Speaker 1: are drastically impacted when you're not getting enough shut eye.
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  Speaker 1: And something I really swear by relating to this is
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  Speaker 1: that I really try to get up around the same
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  Speaker 1: time every day, and of course I wake up at
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  Speaker 1: around five point forty five during the weekend. On the
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  Speaker 1: weekend it's a little bit closer to seven. I find
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  Speaker 1: that it's easier to wake up overall, no matter what
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  Speaker 1: the day is, I'm less irritable, and of course I'm
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  Speaker 1: just plain happier. My next haabit let go of the past.
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  Speaker 1: Living in the past doesn't do us any favors period.
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  Speaker 1: In fact, when you're so focused on what happened yesterday
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  Speaker 1: or a month ago or a year ago, it just
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  Speaker 1: gets in the way of you being in the present
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  Speaker 1: and learning from that. There are definitely going to be
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  Speaker 1: times that this is easier said than done. I've gone
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  Speaker 1: through plenty of things where I feel absolutely incapable of
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  Speaker 1: living in the moment, case in point, a breakup. In
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  Speaker 1: that scenario, it's pretty status quo to have some sort
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  Speaker 1: of morning period that involves your bed and too much
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  Speaker 1: alcohol and not enough food and some quality time with
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  Speaker 1: your friends. The truth is, though, is that everything in
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  Speaker 1: life happens to teach us something, even the hard stuff
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  Speaker 1: like those breakups that make you want to scream and
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  Speaker 1: ugly cry, there's a purpose. And when you're able to
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  Speaker 1: truly live in the moment, your moment, you're able to
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  Speaker 1: get the most out of every single day. You know,
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  Speaker 1: more often than not, we take the bat and we
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  Speaker 1: let it hold us back, and it just doesn't have
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  Speaker 1: to be that way. Happy people are truly happy, not
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  Speaker 1: because they don't fail, but because that they've learned to
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  Speaker 1: take their failures in stride. In fact, I find that
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  Speaker 1: the happiest people have come to understand that failures are
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  Speaker 1: not something that need to be a setback, but instead
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  Speaker 1: they can always be a lesson. All Right, the next
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  Speaker 1: habit set aside time to be alone. I remember how
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  Speaker 1: scared I was to live alone. I thought that I'd
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  Speaker 1: just be super lonely all the time, despite having all
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  Speaker 1: of this newfound freedom in a place to decorate and
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  Speaker 1: call my own. What ended up happening is that my
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  Speaker 1: apartment it became my sanctuary. I came to understand that
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  Speaker 1: if I don't take time just to be alone with
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  Speaker 1: me and my thoughts, then I don't have time to
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  Speaker 1: decompress or process. Spending time alone gives you the opportunity
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  Speaker 1: to evaluate how things are going. Of course, what you
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  Speaker 1: do during this time is completely up to you. Maybe
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  Speaker 1: you journal, or maybe you don't. Maybe you watch crappy
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  Speaker 1: reality television that requires absolutely no brain cells whatsoever. Regardless
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  Speaker 1: of what you do, the alone time is your time.
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  Speaker 1: There's a lot of science on this too, you know.
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  Speaker 1: I was reading a Forbes article the other day that
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  Speaker 1: pointed out that spending time solo actually increases empathy and productivity,
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  Speaker 1: and it can also really help you get to know yourself.
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  Speaker 1: Last year, I went on a trip to Italy alone,
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  Speaker 1: and I was really scared. I remember getting in the
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  Speaker 1: uber to the airport and without any thought, I just
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  Speaker 1: felt tears well up in my eyes. I was so
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  Speaker 1: frightened of just tackling the unknown without a right hand.
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  Speaker 1: The reality was that the second I got to Italy,
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  Speaker 1: those tears were non existent. I felt confident and proud
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  Speaker 1: of myself and excited for whatever was about to meet
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  Speaker 1: me in this like truly special place. It taught me
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  Speaker 1: that sometimes doing things on your own, by yourself can
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  Speaker 1: be empowering. It taught me that I, emily, I'm good
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  Speaker 1: just as I am, and I don't need someone else
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  Speaker 1: to validate that. And the last habit work actively every
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  Speaker 1: day to create your own happiness. You have the opportunity
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  Speaker 1: every single day to do things that bring you joy. Period.
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  Speaker 1: Of course, some days there might be stuff that you
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  Speaker 1: don't want to do or you don't feel like doing,
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  Speaker 1: like going into the office or running errands or whatever
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  Speaker 1: the case may be. Every second you spend waiting for
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  Speaker 1: happiness to find you is a second wasted. Of course,
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  Speaker 1: some things do happen by chance. But I think it's
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  Speaker 1: important to point out that I don't think the happiest
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  Speaker 1: people in the world are always the wealthiest or the
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  Speaker 1: best looking. I think that happy people are people that
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  Speaker 1: put in the effort to be happy, that are willing
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  Speaker 1: to put in the work again. When you make yourself
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  Speaker 1: a priority, the rest of the things just fall into place.
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  Speaker 1: All right, Hurdlers, Tell me what are the things that
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  Speaker 1: you are doing every single day that make you happy.
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  Speaker 1: Make sure to tag me with your strategies on Instagram
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  Speaker 1: and share this episode before the end of today. Do
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  Speaker 1: it right now with a friend. As always, I appreciate
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  Speaker 1: you and I just want to let you know you
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  Speaker 1: guys make me the ha happiest. Another hurdle moment conquered.
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  Speaker 1: Catch you guys next time.