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Choose Freedom Over Fear · Is Your Way In Your Way?

0:26
Cassandra: Good day out there to all my listeners.
0:29
Cassandra: And I'd like to welcome you to Is Your Way and Your Way.
0:33
Cassandra: And I'm your host, Cassandra Crawley Mayo.
0:36
Cassandra: And Is Your Way and Your Way is also the title of my book.
0:41
Cassandra: And I, you know, initially when I started doing podcasts, I used to talk a lot about self-improvement and finding your purpose.
0:53
Cassandra: And I realized it's the podcast is not ultimately about purpose and self-improvement.
1:02
Cassandra: It's more about freedom.
1:05
Cassandra: It's more about the freedom to be who you really are.
1:10
Cassandra: It's about, you know, and I always just say, it's what I also do is I am really hungry for women to start living their best life on their terms.
1:23
Cassandra: And people say, well, that's a cliche, it's a song, we've heard that.
1:27
Cassandra: And I'm like, well, yeah, it can be.
1:29
Cassandra: But let me change your perspective a little bit.
1:32
Cassandra: Why don't you think about this?
1:33
Cassandra: Are you living in a way that increases your joy, your authenticity, and your fulfillment?
1:45
Cassandra: So think about that.
1:47
Cassandra: If you think about all that kind of stuff, purpose and meaning is all in that.
1:52
Cassandra: Self-improvement is all in that, but you got to be free in order to make all of that happen.
1:58
Cassandra: And today we're going to talk about the topic is the courage to choose a different path.
2:06
Cassandra: And I know for a fact that my guest, Kathy Eastwood, we are had we've championed very similar things like self-awareness, courageous, being authentic, change, wholesome, and all of that.
2:23
Cassandra: So no further ado, I'm going to introduce you to Kathy.
2:28
Cassandra: Good day, Kathy.
2:30
Cassandra: Hi, Cassandra.
2:32
Cassandra: Thanks so much for having me.
2:33
Cassandra: Yeah, I'm so glad you're here.
2:35
Cassandra: Kathy and my listeners, you know, I know you're gonna be sitting there listening and saying, hmm, okay, what qualifies Kathy to talk about?
2:45
Cassandra: What we're gonna talk about?
2:46
Cassandra: Well, let me tell you a little bit about her.
2:48
Cassandra: Kathy is a leadership strategist and creator of the Human First E3 Leadership Code, which is express the threes, engage, and execute.
3:01
Cassandra: She has more than 30 years of executive experience across EY, Hewlett-Packard, startups, private equity-backed companies, and she helps leaders achieve sustainable results without sacrificing trust, culture, or well-being.
3:22
Cassandra: She's also the author of the upcoming book, The E3 Leadership Code, a human approach to high performers.
3:31
Cassandra: Now I'm going to say high performance again because usually those high performers have self-sabotage issues.
3:38
Cassandra: It's a lot of things, but you you do quite well, but you you're questioning whether you can do this or not.
3:45
Cassandra: And she is actually on a mission to replace toxic workplace cultures with a line emotionally intelligent leadership.
3:54
Cassandra: So so my listeners, they there now there I'll say you have it.
4:00
Cassandra: Oh, Kathy, I want to know, well, about your early experiences that shaped both your, it sounds like you had a harmful and exceptional leadership within the roles that you were in.
4:18
Cassandra: So tell us about that early experience that shaped you into who and what you're doing today.
4:25
Cassandra: What went on back then, back in the day?
4:28
Kathy: Well, I think, you know, a lot of it is it starts when I was young, right?
4:34
Kathy: My father was a leader that inspired me.
4:37
Kathy: He taught my sister and I the importance of dignity and respect and how we always have to treat people well.
4:45
Kathy: And here's a man that worked his way up from the mail room to being the president of an international company.
4:52
Kathy: And you take that experience, you take, I had a coach in volleyball that taught me how important it was to show up, you know, with we called it mental toughness extra effort, MTX.
5:05
Kathy: You know, you have to work hard, you have to be engaged, but you have to care.
5:10
Kathy: Right.
5:10
Kathy: So all of this was brewing in me in a young age.
5:13
Kathy: And I was a leader, you know, I was the captain of the volleyball team, of the basketball team, the band, I was the drum major.
5:21
Kathy: So I was always in the limelight, if you will, and and trying to figure out how to lead people forward.
5:27
Kathy: And I thought there was a box that you had to fit into, you know, and I always followed the rules, I did everything according to the plans.
5:35
Kathy: And I was then you talk about, we were talking earlier about things happened for a reason.
5:42
Kathy: Yeah.
5:42
Kathy: I I got married, was following, we had the white pick expense, everything was perfect until it wasn't.
5:50
Kathy: And so now I hit kind of what I would call rock bottom.
5:53
Kathy: And so I'm like, wait a minute, I'm following all the rules, but I'm not succeeding.
6:00
Kathy: Like, even following the rules, something isn't right.
6:03
Kathy: And so I ended up divorced at a young age, and I was like, oh my God.
6:08
Kathy: Yep.
6:08
Kathy: And that caused me to stop and think about what do I really want to do?
6:15
Kathy: Obviously, doing what I have to do or should do doesn't seem to work.
6:19
Kathy: So, what would I love to do?
6:20
Kathy: I might as well do what I would love rather than you know, really falling into this space of showing up as someone I'm not.
6:29
Kathy: And so that changed my life for the positive.
6:32
Kathy: You know, you think it could have been the worst thing to happen, but it caused me to step back and say, What would I love?
6:39
Kathy: And that taught me to pick freedom over fear.
6:43
Kathy: Wow.
6:43
Kathy: And it was go ahead, sorry, Cassandra.
6:47
Cassandra: No, that's okay, because what you love, I think is amazing because I want to know how did you know?
6:55
Cassandra: You know, and I asked that because I'm gonna use purpose a little bit with that.
7:00
Cassandra: And you know, individuals say, well, what you enjoy doing is what you should do.
7:03
Cassandra: And I'm like, Well, you know, you always hear the say I like people.
7:07
Cassandra: Okay, all right.
7:08
Cassandra: How how can somebody figure out what they love?
7:13
Kathy: It's a journey, you know.
7:15
Kathy: I think the biggest thing is self-reflection, right?
7:18
Kathy: And we talk about the importance of awareness.
7:21
Kathy: I think it's awareness of yourself.
7:23
Kathy: And the first thing I did was let go of what I thought I should do and started just choosing, asking myself, what would you love?
7:34
Kathy: Well, I actually would love to go to Europe and work in Europe.
7:39
Kathy: And, you know, people are like, well, you can't, that's not gonna happen.
7:44
Kathy: You know, like, why not?
7:46
Kathy: That's what I would love.
7:47
Kathy: And sure enough, I ended up, you know, moving to England, you know, because I let enough people know what I wanted to do, and they were supportive.
7:57
Cassandra: Okay.
7:57
Kathy: And so they're like, okay, well, we'll make this happen.
8:00
Kathy: Because they had a role in Europe in the company I was at, but it wasn't quite right for me.
8:05
Kathy: So they changed it.
8:07
Kathy: They're like, okay, well, we're gonna expand this role so that it does make sense for you, and you'll go over and and work there.
8:14
Kathy: I'm like, all right, excellent.
8:16
Kathy: And so after a year, the question was asked again: Do you want to stay here?
8:21
Kathy: Do you want to go to another country?
8:22
Kathy: What do you want to do?
8:24
Kathy: And I just sat there over drinks one night and said, and asked myself, you could do anything in the world, what would it be?
8:30
Kathy: And I said, Well, I'd actually love to just travel and not have to work.
8:35
Kathy: Okay.
8:36
Kathy: And every again, everyone's like, you can't do that.
8:38
Kathy: And I'm like, why not?
8:40
Kathy: And so, sure enough, six months later, my bag was packed.
8:44
Kathy: I'd had an app sack on, and I had an aware around the world ticket, and I traveled for a year.
8:51
Kathy: Well, nine months actually.
8:52
Kathy: I finished after nine.
8:54
Kathy: But I just backpacked through Asia by myself.
8:58
Kathy: Wow.
8:59
Kathy: You know, I was told in so many different ways, you can't do that.
9:04
Kathy: You shouldn't do that.
9:05
Kathy: You can't have a gap on your resume.
9:07
Kathy: You can't, you know, a lot of you can't.
9:09
Kathy: And I'm like, well, why not?
9:11
Cassandra: Right.
9:12
Kathy: So I didn't really have a purpose then, Cassandra, at that point, other than trying to listen to my heart and really say what I would love, and then not let the fear, ego, uncertainty, and doubt, I call it feud, get in the way.
9:27
Kathy: And so that it worked right now.
9:31
Kathy: Two things have happened positively from it.
9:34
Kathy: And so that's teaching me.
9:36
Kathy: Okay, you can do whatever you want, Kath.
9:38
Kathy: You just have to decide what it is you want.
9:40
Cassandra: Wow.
9:41
Cassandra: Look at the carriage that you choose to take a different path.
9:47
Cassandra: Now that that was courageous, and I like the point, it wasn't so much purpose at that moment in your life, it was freedom.
9:57
Cassandra: I it it's that's what it sounds like to me.
10:00
Cassandra: I I think I want to move to Europe, and I think I want to travel, and you and you did that, and I applaud you for doing that.
10:09
Cassandra: So I am curious because you know, in the beginning, I talked about this podcast, used to be about self-improvement and purpose and meaning, and not that it's not, that's not the ultimate.
10:20
Cassandra: It's about to me, it's about uh the freedom.
10:24
Cassandra: So what modality did you use to choose freedom over fear?
10:34
Cassandra: You acted on it, but and and I like you indicated initially, it was a journey.
10:41
Cassandra: So being a journey, it wasn't easy, but you acted on it.
10:46
Cassandra: So is there something that my listeners could like think about to start choosing that freedom over over fear?
10:56
Cassandra: And one of the main things people say not negating it.
10:59
Cassandra: Oh, I don't have the money to do that.
11:02
Kathy: You know, we're very good as humans to find to protect ourselves.
11:08
Kathy: We will find every excuse in the book of why we can't do something.
11:13
Kathy: And I think because I hit such a negative in point in my life, right, of the divorce, and you know, to me, it's like, well, what's the worst case that can happen?
11:26
Kathy: I end up back on my parents' couch.
11:29
Kathy: Well, that already happened, and I survived it.
11:33
Cassandra: Okay.
11:33
Kathy: And that's what I find a lot of times when I'm talking to folks is imagine the worst thing.
11:39
Kathy: Put all of your fear, your ego, your uncertainty and doubt, put it all on the table and then name it to tame it, is one of the phrases one of my strategy coasts uses with me.
11:50
Kathy: Because if we name it, then we can tame it.
11:53
Kathy: But if we don't know it's there, then it's really hard to choose the freedom over the fear.
12:00
Kathy: So I think it's really the self-reflection is the most powerful thing because I kept asking myself, what's the worst thing?
12:07
Kathy: You know, why not?
12:08
Kathy: And that that actually, if if there was one question, Cassandra, it was why not?
12:13
Kathy: You know, as soon as I thought about an idea and someone said you can't do that, I'm like, why not?
12:18
Kathy: You know, tell me what's the worst case if I don't succeed.
12:22
Kathy: Wow.
12:23
Kathy: And that just gave me that insight and that courage then of what's the worst case?
12:28
Kathy: I've already been there, I already went back to living on my parents' couch.
12:32
Cassandra: Wow, I love name it to tame it.
12:35
Cassandra: Name it to tame it.
12:39
Cassandra: For some reason, I was thinking of an alcoholic addict, or you know, oh, I'm not an alcoholic, I'm not okay, all right.
12:47
Cassandra: And once you say it, well, come on.
12:50
Cassandra: I mean, like you said, become aware of it.
12:53
Cassandra: This it is what you are, and then that's when you could make a move if you chose to make a move, but you got to identify with what the heck is going on, so yeah, so that that's cool down because you you were free, you did what you wanted to do, you you tamed what you named.
13:34
Cassandra: What did you learn about that?
13:36
Cassandra: And what about and and what you learned, did it have a lot to do with what you're doing today?
13:45
Kathy: It does actually.
13:46
Kathy: It's back to that journey part of it, but learning my own fears, egos, uncertainty, and doubt, and having naming it, I was like, wait a minute, wow, everyone is must be carrying something around.
13:59
Kathy: Right.
13:59
Kathy: Because people would look at me and they're like, Oh, you you have all of the courage in the world, you do what you want, and and you're lucky.
14:06
Kathy: And I'm like, am I?
14:08
Kathy: I don't know if I'm lucky, but wait a minute, this means everyone's carrying something around.
14:14
Kathy: So that was the start for me is to really think about people and how they show up and why they either choose not to continue down the path they want to, and they choose the safe reason, and how you interact with people.
14:29
Kathy: So that really was always in my mind now when I met someone else.
14:34
Kathy: And they're like, I can't do that.
14:36
Kathy: I'm like, why not?
14:37
Kathy: Like, you know, so now I'm using the the frame I put on myself, I'm asking others, you know, what are you fearful of?
14:44
Kathy: And is that really possible, or are you just allowing that to protect you?
14:49
Kathy: And they would go, Oh, yeah.
14:51
Kathy: So I brought that into a lot of the work I was doing in corporations.
14:56
Kathy: I was always involved in massive changes.
14:59
Kathy: And I'm a doer, I love to get things done, I'm an operator.
15:04
Kathy: Yeah, and what I learned is not everyone is like me.
15:08
Kathy: And so, what do I need to do to help others in this journey?
15:13
Kathy: So, all of this change then led me to, you know, I had great leaders to learn from.
15:18
Kathy: We talked about that a little bit earlier, but even through my career, I had amazing leaders, and then I hit the point of having the toxic leader, and then I really stopped and said, okay, what's going on here?
15:31
Kathy: And I left HP.
15:34
Kathy: I left a very lucrative job, which was hard to do, but I realized that I didn't work well under this leader, and so dug into the courage again, left, and that's when I really said, okay, I looked at a statistic that scared me.
15:52
Kathy: Less than 8%.
15:53
Kathy: This one article read 8% of people accomplish their goals.
15:59
Kathy: And I went, whoa, whoa, wait, that's really low.
16:03
Kathy: And then I started doing some more research, and another one says 10%, another one says 12%.
16:09
Kathy: People are telling me I'm crazy.
16:12
Kathy: So I'm like, let's just go with less than 30%.
16:14
Kathy: Can we go with that?
16:15
Kathy: That means 70% are failing.
16:19
Kathy: And I'm thinking, I moved to England because I wanted to do that.
16:23
Kathy: I traveled around the world, I had run successfully a number of change initiatives, run a lot that didn't succeed.
16:30
Kathy: So I have been on both sides.
16:32
Kathy: So what am I doing different?
16:34
Kathy: And that made me really stop and reflect and say, you know, it's a lot of the initiatives around change management.
16:41
Kathy: You learn you need purpose, you need to have an envision, you need to have your people bought in.
16:47
Kathy: And all of this, as I was doing the research, I'm like, oh, there's a repeatable formula here.
16:52
Cassandra: Yeah.
16:53
Kathy: And that's how I came to writing the E3 leadership code was I want to help others accomplish what they want to accomplish, just like I was able to do.
17:04
Cassandra: So what do you think?
17:05
Cassandra: What do you think the the the most common mistakes leadership makes to motivate people?
17:14
Kathy: I think they try to lead like themselves.
17:16
Kathy: You know, they they assume how they show up is appropriate for everyone, right?
17:23
Kathy: And they don't take into consideration that it's it may not be right for everyone.
17:29
Kathy: And I think also, and especially women, I think do this, they think there's a mold where you have to show up in a certain way.
17:37
Kathy: And so they try to be someone that's not them.
17:42
Cassandra: Yeah, and that leads to what try to misalignment, right?
17:49
Kathy: You get in you get in your way, as your book and your podcast talks about, right?
17:54
Kathy: If you're trying to show up as someone else, you're never gonna be successful.
17:58
Cassandra: Exactly.
17:58
Cassandra: You will burn out.
18:00
Cassandra: I mean, burn out, and I love what you said about people lead like like them.
18:14
Cassandra: For example, you know, I listen to I listen to podcasts, I don't listen to mine a lot, but I do listen.
18:21
Cassandra: But I always listen to to to optimism, you know, what's going on because I need that.
18:29
Cassandra: I'm very careful what I look at, listen to.
18:32
Cassandra: And there's a guy by the name of Randy V, and I'm not promoting him at all, but he said something to me.
18:42
Cassandra: He talked about his dad, they were immigrants, and they had a a liquor store, and how toxic, he didn't say toxic, but just listening to him, how his dad handled the employees, it was just ridiculous.
18:57
Cassandra: And he said one day, he said, look, if everybody was uh all these employees were like you would none of them work for you.
19:06
Cassandra: You know why?
19:06
Cassandra: Because they'll have their own liquor store, they'll be doing their own thing.
19:10
Cassandra: And I'm like, you know, look that that's a great point because I too have had toxic leadership, and it just drove me up a wall.
19:19
Cassandra: Now, so can you know, I've heard people say, okay, I'm gonna motivate them.
19:26
Cassandra: Can't can people be motivated?
19:30
Kathy: I believe so.
19:31
Kathy: When you speak their language, uh-huh.
19:34
Kathy: You know, they have to want, you have to, I think you have to learn what will motivate them.
19:42
Kathy: Okay, because what motivates you and motivates me are two different things.
19:46
Kathy: Okay.
19:46
Kathy: And if I walk in and think everyone wants, you know, to eliminate toxic leadership, like I would love to, not everyone does, you know.
19:56
Kathy: So I do believe our job as leaders is to get to know our people and understand what they're I call it with them.
20:04
Kathy: What's in it for me?
20:05
Kathy: What's in it for me?
20:06
Kathy: Yeah.
20:07
Kathy: And so I think, you know, as you talk about like what's in your way, right?
20:12
Kathy: When you can learn what motivates each person, then you should lead them based on that motivation.
20:18
Kathy: You know, some people want to work alone, some people want to collaborate.
20:22
Cassandra: Right.
20:23
Kathy: So then my job as a leader is to make sure that I'm helping them, the ones that want to be alone, stretch to learn to collaborate, you know, to stretch.
20:33
Kathy: But then I give both the opportunity, right?
20:35
Kathy: So if we're doing an exercise, I might give the exercise in advance, give the people that want to do it alone time to prep.
20:43
Kathy: And then, okay, now we have to come together and do this together.
20:46
Kathy: Exactly so.
20:48
Kathy: My job is to balance what each needs, not easy, but possible.
20:56
Cassandra: Exactly.
20:56
Cassandra: So there are some actual leaders.
21:00
Cassandra: I think we're all a leader, depending on you know what way, but how can they how do you think they can figure out what makes them tick and what not?
21:11
Cassandra: Because you know, me being in corporate for so long, it's kind of like, well, I don't have time to figure out who they are.
21:18
Cassandra: You know what I mean?
21:18
Cassandra: It's kind of like, well, I got to do this, well, they have to do that.
21:21
Cassandra: And if you want to be effective, I I you're right on with that.
21:25
Cassandra: So, how could a leader figure that out?
21:30
Kathy: So, number one is awareness and self-reflection, you know, and really to we do an exercise in our boot camps and team workshops, is we call it the E3 leadership profile, and it's a series of questions.
21:45
Kathy: Right?
21:45
Kathy: What are your values?
21:47
Kathy: Okay, you know, what are your non-negotiables?
21:49
Kathy: How do you like to communicate?
21:51
Kathy: How do you how do you like to get recognition?
21:54
Kathy: So it walks people through their own awareness.
21:59
Kathy: So then that creates their profile they can share with others.
22:02
Kathy: And so if you do this as a team and you bring yours forward and you ask your team to do the same, that becomes the ability to build relationships and trust.
22:12
Cassandra: Exactly.
22:13
Kathy: And so then, you know, now I know that's interesting.
22:17
Kathy: Do not call Mary after five o'clock because the kids are home and she needs to eat dinner.
22:24
Kathy: But Mary will get back on at eight o'clock.
22:26
Kathy: I'm okay with that.
22:28
Kathy: But you learn that by asking the questions and being direct and being vulnerable yourself, right?
22:34
Kathy: So if you don't know yourself and you're not able to be authentic and share that with others, you can't expect others.
22:39
Kathy: So it really starts with your own self awareness and then now bringing that on to others and asking directly, you know, and being vulnerable.
22:49
Cassandra: Okay.
22:49
Cassandra: And, you know, that makes me think of, you know, today, times are, I want to say interesting, you know, the unemployment and, you know, cutting costs and cutting back and saving in order to save money.
23:10
Cassandra: And it's the bottom line.
23:12
Cassandra: And I'm like, okay, yeah.
23:14
Cassandra: But your employees can make or break you.
23:17
Cassandra: And if they're not treated with dignity, why would they, you know, want to do what what they have to do?
23:27
Cassandra: Well, many people do it because they want benefits.
23:30
Cassandra: Not that they love it, but they have they have to have benefits.
23:33
Cassandra: And I've known organizations that said, well, we need to cut back.
23:37
Cassandra: And the first thing we need to cut back is training.
23:39
Cassandra: And I'm like, oh my gosh, really?
23:42
Cassandra: You know, it's kind of like the what you just shared about programs.
23:46
Cassandra: How do you engage?
23:48
Cassandra: How do you team build?
23:49
Cassandra: How do you get to know your people?
23:51
Cassandra: No, we're just going to cut training out because that that's cost too much or retreats or whatever.
23:57
Cassandra: And those are the things that enable you to get to know individuals well.
24:03
Cassandra: And it it it's it's ROI.
24:05
Cassandra: That's return on investment, but they don't get it.
24:09
Kathy: Yeah.
24:09
Kathy: No, I I yeah this is a battle I I fight often, Cassandra.
24:15
Kathy: And I've been a chief FEPL officer.
24:17
Kathy: So I know those battles.
24:19
Kathy: I know the cost, the return.
24:22
Kathy: Sometimes hard to quantify it in the short term, but it's proven in the long term when you take care of your people, they then take care of your customers.
24:32
Kathy: And that's when the profitability of a business shows up.
24:36
Kathy: And it's proven that 23% more profitability is when you take a human approach first.
24:42
Kathy: And that's, you know, we talk about the E3 leadership code.
24:46
Kathy: It is about putting people front and center because that is actually how you're going to succeed.
24:53
Cassandra: Yeah.
24:53
Kathy: And the leaders that get it know it and they'll they'll do the right thing.
24:57
Kathy: But some a lot of people get feel like they're stuck in the vicious cycle and aren't they struggle seeing the virtuous cycle they would create by investing in their people.
25:08
Cassandra: Right.
25:09
Cassandra: Exactly.
25:10
Cassandra: I used to work for Marriott and one of the things Mr.
25:12
Cassandra: Marriott used to always say hire friendly teach technical because it's a hospitality business you know so hire the friendly people we'll deal with the other kind of stuff.
25:24
Kathy: So yeah so I I I love that now you mentioned I love it when you said most people live in a feud talk about that a little bit a feud yeah so it's the acronym I I've expanded the FUD the fear uncertainty and doubt to put the in an ego because sometimes ego is what drives people and when times are tough when there's a lot of stress and pressure our feud is going to come into play more we just naturally want to embrace and protect ourselves right so it's our own way of protecting ourselves and it just gets more and more intense when it's hard when there's pressure when there's stress when there's scary unknowns and we're living in a very scary time and I think as leaders we have to respect that and we have to really talk to people about and be open right so one of the things I'll coach leaders on is ask your people what's your feudame it and that's people don't want to ask personal questions.
26:39
Kathy: Yes.
26:39
Kathy: But that's what's going to keep you and your team back if you don't know.
26:43
Kathy: If you try to ignore the negative right it's it's going to blow up in your face at some point because people then don't feel heard they don't feel valued and right yeah I'm out or worse they stay right and don't contribute a hundred percent and and then unfortunately there are many of them that don't want to speak out for fear of retaliation.
27:06
Kathy: Yes absolutely I agree and that's where trust is so important.
27:11
Kathy: You talked about hiring the the people skilled it's with trust as well you have to nurture trust within your team and it's not easy but that's it is powerful.
27:23
Kathy: Yes yes and and is the saying true it takes a while to trust and a minute to is that is that what they say yeah I think it is my dad's got one there it's you can have all the attaboys in the bank and one Ash it excuse my language causes people to not trust anymore yeah so you really have to always be on top of it and care.
27:51
Cassandra: Right.
27:52
Cassandra: That's right.
27:53
Cassandra: How okay so you do okay share with my listeners even though I read your bio and I want to talk about your book too but you you coach what what other things do you currently do that you love doing because I know you love doing what what you what you're doing okay you did the traveling and and all of that you love that you you you you had to go back home but you had courage like well what's what's the worst that could happen right so so what else tell us about the coaching and what other things do you do to to inspire and encourage individuals yeah so the inspire and enable is what really is my motivator that gets me up every that's what I would love.
28:40
Kathy: If I then get paid that's what I want to be doing.
28:43
Kathy: So what I what's in a cherry on top is when I do get paid.
28:47
Kathy: So in a speaking engagement so I love talking in front of large organizations.
28:52
Kathy: I love talking to employee resource groups because then I can really inspire a number of people to think about you know the code and how they can apply it.
29:02
Kathy: One-on-one coaching is something that's always fun because then I can challenge people you know how do you want to show up?
29:11
Kathy: What would you love?
29:12
Kathy: It's funny my question what would you love?
29:14
Kathy: My friends know this this is I ask them all the time what would you love?
29:18
Kathy: My husband would you love and so then also team workshops because if you do the work and self-reflection on yourself when you do that jointly with your team that helps build that trust and when you can you can build the trust quicker when you're deliberate in getting everyone to understand more.
29:39
Kathy: And so that's the ideal is to get in with a team and really all of the leaders right so that imagine an organization where the CEO all the way down to the first line manager is inspired right they're doing what they would love they're leading well they're worrying about their teams and helping to inspire and enable them you create a very virtuous cycle in your business and that's what I love doing is helping spark that within a team so that eventually the entire organization has that culture and that trust among each other.
30:20
Cassandra: Right.
30:20
Cassandra: You know I thought about something I don't I don't know about everybody but I know majority of people have worked in toxic if it's not working they've been in toxic relationships it doesn't have to be corporate or just period and and and you know in the beginning listeners Kathy and I were just talking before we came on and you know and it's kind of like like like she talked about she she didn't because of the toxic environment she was in she's like I I just can't do this.
30:58
Cassandra: You know I can't I I just can't do this anymore.
31:00
Cassandra: So let me do this and and we all say that but yeah there's that fear that okay if I if I I have to have a job you know I have I have to have this but yet you know if you do not have a job if you do downsize lost your job look what Kathy found out of all the drama I'm gonna say drama that she that she had gone through.
31:26
Cassandra: Now we could either sit in that and we could be better or better about it.
31:32
Cassandra: You know we could mull over it and you know yes it is a journey but how long do you want to mull how long do you want to sit in it you know and you can't and it's like Kat she just got to the point you know yeah I want to go to your okay I went there got a job I didn't really like it anymore I wanted to do something different.
31:48
Cassandra: Okay well then okay so I'm gonna travel I travel and then we have this thing well I'm gonna have to probably go back to my parents well okay I did that too but look at the outcome it's like no pain no gain you know and we all are going to go through something life is not a bed of roses all the time and and that's why you know I said is your way in your way Kathy had every opportunity to let her way stay in her way and she probably would have been living with her parents you know you just you just never know and so with that I just I like to know because you coach too and my thing is let's start living our best life on our terms and what you do is you inspire and enable people to accomplish their dreams and their goals so what would you tell my listeners what methodology or what would you share with them to kind of give them that fire in their belly to say okay like you said you can motivate people now you know and you can take them to to the water but you can't make them drink it.
33:11
Cassandra: So what are some of the your your your words of wisdom that you could share with my individuals who are in their way but yet they have dreams and goals they want to do but it's not happening.
33:23
Kathy: Yeah I I think it really comes down to the E3 leadership code which is my simple way of reminding people with a set of questions of how to get out of your way right so number one is being able to express what you want to do what you would love why you want to do it right and really having that purpose on where you want to go and I find you know asking a lot of people what would you love if they're not able to answer it then you need to spend a little more time doing it because that's going to be your grounding tool when you get off the path when you're exhausted when you feel like you're back on your parents' couch whatever it is oh that's right this is what I would love to do.
34:06
Kathy: This is why I'm doing it so that's number one.
34:09
Kathy: The second question is who do you need in your corner to help you with that?
34:14
Kathy: Who do you who are your stakeholders?
34:16
Kathy: You know if you're managing through a change knowing it's your team your peers your boss could be vendors right like who do you need?
34:24
Kathy: And if it's a personal thing, you know who do I have to convince when I was going to go move to England I had to talk to my parents right because they could have made it difficult but I had to get them on board.
34:35
Kathy: So if you want to stop about how do I engage people that are going to help me make this happen.
34:41
Cassandra: Right.
34:42
Kathy: And then the third leg and I think of this as a stool right express the envision engage your people the third leg is execution and this is where a lot of people do fall down in my opinion because it's easier to let the fear ego uncertainty and doubt stop us rather than pushing through you know picking that optimism knowing who we are getting up every morning and doing the tough things as my husband says have I didn't eat my toad yet today right and so it's that repetitiveness that trust that optimism it's the execution that we have to go through.
35:20
Kathy: I had decided I was going to write a book that was I expressed the vision I am writing a book it's going to be on the New York Times bestseller list.
35:29
Kathy: You know I brought all the people in it took me probably five years to write the book wow but I stuck with it every day and when you know I did all the hard work and I'm now one of the one percent like you that have been able to write a book this is not easy.
35:50
Kathy: Oh no I'm sure you'll attest to it right but you're part of the one percent yeah and it's because of that engage that execution side of it and then for me so if you think of the three legged stool express engage execute the seat of it is the emotional intelligence the courage the curiosity the awareness the authenticity empowerment those are all the things that power that express engage execute yeah so you need to think about do I need to be more courageous?
36:23
Kathy: Do I need to be more authentic and those are often scary but you know keep pushing that's accomplish anything you put your mind to that's right emotional intelligence is is key that yeah even AI is the today but you got to have that emotional intelligence too absolutely and and honestly humanity is now more important with AI because AI is going to be the intelligence that's right and you're gonna be replaced if you only go after the technical or smart that's right part of it.
37:00
Cassandra: If you can't connect to people's hearts you're not going to succeed and you're not that's how that's how people change you can keep it to their hearts you're so right you're so right so that book the E3 Leadership Code a human approach to high performance where can my listeners get that book they could check out my website if they want a signed copy they can go to Kathyeastwood.com slash book okay and there's the links to get it on any of the major retailers as well it's on Amazon Barnes and Noble Maximilian okay okay wow this is awesome thank you so much for your insight your wisdom I could certainly relate to so many things and I'm feeling my listeners could do it too and that's why I ask my listeners if they enjoyed this podcast to press like and subscribe and I always say share it if you know of somebody that could really use the content you know I was listening today about you know social media media is all about socialization but also it's now about social interest you know starting with which interests you so that you can continue to grow learn and serve to me that is so important and and Kathy you provided any other platforms you'd like individuals to look at for you to follow you is just your website anything else?
38:38
Kathy: Yeah LinkedIn is a great place because I'm often posting and how to be more self-reflective how to connect to other people's hearts and and little tips and tricks like that.
38:50
Cassandra: Okay great.
38:51
Cassandra: Well it was a pleasure conversing with you this morning or for some this this tonight or this evening or whatever.
39:00
Cassandra: So I thank you so much for being my guest and for my listeners like I always say bye for now and I always say God bless you and Kathy again was my pleasure thank you thank you so much for having me and all the work that you're doing to help bring more humanity to the workplace thank you thank