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09 - Unspecialist · Classic Sci-Fi Tales Audio Library

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Unspecialist. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer,
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: please visit LibriVox dot org. Unspecialist by Murray F. Yaco.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Banner ripped open his orders, read them, stared in disbelief
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: for a quick moment, then cursed wildly while reaching for
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: the telephone. Hello, Gastonia, Yes, I got 'em. What kind
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: of way to waste our time? You lunkheads? Think? Oh
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: it's you, Colonel Banner dropped the receiver and let it dangle.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: He sank into the only soft chair in the apartment
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: and watched hypnotically as the phone's receiver limply coiled and
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: uncoiled at the end of the wire. Somebody knocked on
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: and then opened the door. Hi, pretty boy, he got
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: your orders. Come on in and hear about it, Banner said.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: He got up from the chair, ran his hands compulsively
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: through his recently short cropped red hair, hung up the phone,
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: and shoved the orders into his coal pilot's hands. Harcraft
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: read them over three times and then sank into the chair,
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: just vacated by Banner. Finally, while Banner poured them both
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: a drink, he managed to blurt, potato fertilizer and tractor fuel.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: Oh no, oh, no, no, no, oh, yes, yes, yes,
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Banner said bitterly. We are heroes of the spaceways. Yes, indeed,
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: we trained for ten years acquire great skill in the
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: art of the patrol. We dedicate ourselves to the protection
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: of the Federation. We ready ourselves for war. We gird
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: our young, strong loins. We you gettin' hysterical, said Harcraft,
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: who poured himself another drink, began pacing the floor and
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: took up where Banner had left off. We've never even
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: been lost on patrol, and now they do this. It's unbelievable.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: Potato fertilizer and tractor fuel. We're supposed to travel thirty
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: six light years, pick up one thousand sleds of the stuff,
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: deliver it to some god forsaken farm planet another thirty
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: years out, and return to base. You know what they'll do.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: Then he turned to Banner, pointed his finger accusingly and repeated,
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: you know what they'll do? Then, how would I know,
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: said Banner, glumly, staring into his drink. Well, I can
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: tell you what they'll do, Yes, sir, I can tell you.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: Harcraft's pudgy face and oversized brown eyes seemed to melt
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: into each other, giving him the appearance of an angry,
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: if not very bright, chimpanzee. Okay, what'll they do, Banner said,
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: They'll give us metals. That's what they'll do. For the
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: safe delivery of one million tons of tractor fuel, You
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: two fine specimens of manhood, are hereby presented with the
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: order of the Oil. And for your courageous service and
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: delivering two million tons of potato fertilizer, you are also
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: awarded the Shield of and never mind, Banner said, it
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: could be worse. They could have saddled us with a
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: bean brain. Come on, let's go to some bar and
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: get sober. We're leaving for freight duty. At seventeen hundred.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: The bean Brain met them at the airlock. My name
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: is Arnold, here's my orders, Banner stared at Hardcraft. Hardcraft
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: stared at Arnold. Get inside, said Banner. The bean brain smiled, Uh,
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: could just sort of lead the way. I've never been
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: inside a ship before. If you got some kind of can,
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: it would save a mess. I'll probably vombit a while.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: They stopped calling him bean Brain. Three days later, he
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: was still sick, miserably spacesick, and neither Banner nor Hardcraft
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: had the heart to keep needling him. On the fourth day,
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: he managed to get up and around. They ate their
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: first meal together that day. Let's get something straight right
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: off the bat, Banner said, neither Hardcraft nor I got
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: anything against you except prejudice. That right, Hartcraft, right, Harcraft
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: said in short, continued Banner between puffs on a cigarette.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: All we know is what we've heard, and that's not good,
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: said Harcraft. Item one said, Banner, blowing smoke at the
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: ceiling ventilator. Patrol Command came up with the bean brain
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: idea about six months ago. Patrol Command and its infinite wisdom,
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: has never seen fit to explain why bean brains are
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: sometimes assigned evidently at random, to small patrol vessels such
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: as this. The orders always state that the passenger will
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: accompany pilot and co pilot throughout the entire trip, will
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: obey the orders, yet is equal in rank to the
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: ship's commanding officer. The bean brain has no duties aboard.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: This seems to make sense, at least since bean brains
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: aren't trained for anything and can't do anything. Item too
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: said banner, taking his eyes off the ceiling and pointing
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: a finger at Arnold. I have or had two good friends,
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: both patrol captains who had the honor of taxiing bean
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: brains around the universe. One never came back. The other,
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: captain Slatkin, came back and got a big medal for
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: reasons he'll never talk about. And Slackkin like to brag,
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: said Harcraft knowingly. Arnold stood up slowly. He was a
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: small man, but as he looked up at the ship's
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: pilot and co pilot, he gave both the impression of
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: height and strength. I'll tell you something too, he said,
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: speaking slowly, as if in pain. I don't know why
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: bean brains are assigned to ships like this either. I've
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: never been told. I took the job because I didn't
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: like what I was doing before. I've never had any
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: real training, and this seemed like a chance to do
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: something that sounded like fun. Like I said, I've never
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: been told anything. They tested me for a lot of things,
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: then they gave me my orders and told me to
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: come along. And if you're wondering, I've flung to the
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: esp tests, so there's nothing there. You want to consider
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: me dead? Weight, Okay, your privilege. Leave me alone. If
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: you want to, I'll do the same. Be friendly, I'll
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: be friendly. Ask me to help, I'll do my best.
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: Then he got up and went back to his bunk.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: During the next six weeks, Arnold spent most of the
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: time in his bunk scanning tapes from the ship's micro
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: library on an overhead viewer. At meal times, he was polite,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: offering no further information about himself, yet entering into any
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: conversation that centered around such trivia as terrestrial sports, taxes, money,
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: liquor food, government agencies. By mutual if silent agreement, Neither
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: women nor work were discussed. Working in the ship's control room,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: sometimes together, sometimes spelling each other, Banner and Harcraft speculated
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: bitterly and endlessly about their passenger theories to explain his presence.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: Most of them propounded by Harcraft were created, torn apart,
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: modified exploded in giant sequences of effort, which left both
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: men finally exhausted and tired of the whole business. On
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: the second day of the seventh week out there, Ennui
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: vanished a ship was picked up by the specks. Banner
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: and at their delight at the break and routine. They
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: summoned Arnold up to the cabin. Take a good look,
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: said Banner. It's an anchor Babian ship, probably the first
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: and the last you'll ever see see. Arnold watched as
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: Banner's finger tracked a slowly moving point of light across
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: a recessed ceiling screen. Yes, Sir, said Harcraft, you are
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: looking at the representatives of mankind's only sibling, the noble
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: anchor Bades. Then he recited, in a sing song voice,
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: a simple race the anchor Bades. They wear no clothes
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: and live in caves, but out in space they do
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: in minutes what our ships do at speeds and fine.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Cultural paranoia added Warcraft. Huh, I mean just what I said.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: You and a million others recite that ditty or variations
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: of it every day of the week. It all adds
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: up to the fact that the world is full of
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: small egged animals who, for ten years have done nothing
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: but just scream that we're about to be attacked by
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: the savage anchor Bades. Tis tisk, said Banner. Treason, my lieutenant, treason,
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: of you. I had expected at least a show of chauvinism.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: Stop tiss tsking me Harcraft said irritably. You've known how
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: I felt about this mess for a long time. Yes, indeed,
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: said Banner, yawning. Ever since you took that micro course
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: in culturalogy, you have insights into the situation, denying to
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: the rest of the race anyway, Harcraft said, making a
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: small adjustment on the screen, You and countless other atavisms
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: are reacting in a very predictable way, since you can't
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: reconcile the naked anchor bades and their superior technology, and
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: since they are alien to point of showing no interest
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: whatsoever in our elaborate art institutions rituals, instance, piped up Arnold,
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: startling both men. The human unconscious can't help but equate
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: nakedness with savagery. We have armed our mighty planet to
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: the teeth, convinced that armageddon is around the corner. Wow,
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: said the surprise Hardcraft. Where'd you pick that up? Asked
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: Banner from Captain Slatkin, said Arnold, smiling. I met him
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: when I was indoctrinated. He took the same micro course
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: in culturalogy. Of course, he only believed that stuff when
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: he was scared. Oh you don't say, said Banner, tell us,
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: my little friend, Are you too convinced that armageddon is
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: around the corner? Not that I really think you're capable
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: of having an opinion. I got plenty of opinions, all right,
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: said Arnold, quietly, staring at his shoes. Opinion number one
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: is this, we're not really at war yet, but within
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: the past two years, fifty six patrol ships have disappeared
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: in the vicinity of our friendly neighbor. Well, that's not
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: an opinion, Banner said, And disappeared can mean a lot
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: of things. Opinion number two continued Arnold, scratching him under
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: an arm. About the only diplomatic relations we got with
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: them animals is when they write a note complaining about
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: some patrol ship getting too close to some piece of
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: dirt in their system. Speaking of that, you'll have to
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: excuse me for a moment, Harcraft said, Stop clowning, snap, Banner,
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: listen to him. Here's your chance to get some insight
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: into the nature of the thorn in your side. Go on, bean, brain,
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: any more opinions. Yeah, if you're such a wise guy,
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: tell me why you're here right now. Why Arnold's mouth
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: screwed itself into a knowing, bitter smile when both of
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: you were children, you heard the story about the big fleet,
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: so you made it into the patrol, spent the rest
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: of your life training looking thinking that someday Hartcraft broke
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: in That tale about anchor Badian fleet build up has
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: been discredited a full thousand times. When they pried that
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: crazy scout out of his ship was an hour away
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: from the crematorium. You try spending forty six days in
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: space without food or water. Sometime you'll see hidden arsenals
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: of alien ships. Till Hell won't have it and added banner,
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: where is this fleet build up supposed to take place?
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: The Patrol has had every planet and reachable space under
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: scheduled surveillance for the past twenty years. You don't hide
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: a thousand S type cruisers in somebody's pocket, so nobody's scared. Huh,
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: said Arnold. So the entire Space Command has been playing
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: foot seat all over the galaxy for twenty years, looking
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: for a thousand ships that aren't there in the first place. Huh.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: Routine surveillance, said Harcraft. A thousand ships, said Arnold, slapping
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: his sweaty forehead. They'll burn through our defense system like
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: you're a paranoid rabble Rouser, said Banner lightly, We've got
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: work to do up here. How about getting back to
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: your bunk. Two days later, they made scheduled contact with
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: the caravan of potato fertilizer and tractor fuel one thousand
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: sleds in tandem or in proper orbit two hundred miles
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: above seed do or two. Their orders provided for a
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: landing on the planet and a short ship leave at
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: the discretion of the ship's pilot to refreshed personnel. Banner
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: and Harcraft decided against landing. All necessary contact now that
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: they were out of hyperdrive, could be accomplished with the
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: ship's radio. Short planet falls were psychologically more trouble than
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: they were worth, often destroying the hard earned dedicated space orientation,
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: which was their only defense against the abysmal boredom. It's
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: a dull place, anyway, explained Harcraft to Arnold, who had
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: come up from the control room. It's a mining and
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: processing settlement, maybe five hundred families altogether. Got a funny
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: religion too, Huh what kind, well, began Harcraft breezily. Sort
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: of sacrificial, you might say. They believe in killing strangers
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: who annoy their women. A dull place Arnold agreed, wiping
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: his nose with his sleeve. Speaking of religion, said Banner,
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: I just talked to their monitor on the radio. They've
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: picked up twelve big ships on their scanner during the
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: past two days. Anchor Bades asked Arnold quickly. Uh huh,
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: but not what you think. It's Easter time or some
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: such thing at home. They all returned to the home
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: planet and stay there for about thirty days in the
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: spring religious festival. Oh yeah, they paint themselves blue and
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: howl at both of their moons for a month. I
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: read about at once. We'll be home too pretty soon,
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: ventured Harcraft, for whom the return journey was subjectively always short.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: Let's hitch up to those sleds, Banner said, It's time
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: to get going. Four weeks later, two of the fertilizer
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: sleds went out of phase and automatically cut the ship
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: out of hyperdrive. A welcome diversion, Banner said to Harcraft,
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: you are now about to meet your mortal enemy, face
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: to face. Manual labor, never, said Harcraft, assuming the pose
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: of a man bravely facing the firing squad. Patrol duty
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: is my lifeblood, even freight duty such as this I
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: can stomach, but manual labor. Please Captain, let the air
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: out of the ship if you will, but never shall
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: these hands. Did somebody call me? Asked Arnold, appearing silently, Yeah,
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: said Banner. How'd you like to help? Sure? What do
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: you got? A couple sleds are out of phase. You
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: and Harcraft are going to slip into suits and go
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: out and find the trouble. Arnold shrugged. Okay with me?
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: When do we start? Pretty quick, said Banner, who had
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: turned to look at the ship's speck scanner. Looks like
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: we're in a belt of meteorites. We'll be able to
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: match velocities, but we could still be creamed if the
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: path gets too eccentric. Show him the way, Hartcraft. I
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: don't want to take any longer than necessary either, understand.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: Fifteen minutes later, both Arnold and Harcraft were out of
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: the airlock, each clutching a new phase unit. Harcraft called
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: instructions to Arnold over his suit's intercom, but within minutes
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: the smaller man was, if anything, more adept at the
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: business of maneuvering himself through the void than his teacher.
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: They replaced the phase unit in the first sled the
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: fiftieth from the ship, with Hartcraft doing the work and
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: Arnold watching. Can you do the next one alone? Harcraft asked,
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: easy as pie? Arnold said, where is it? About two
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: hundred sleds farther back? Numbers on the side, number two
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: hundred and sixty three. Can you remember? I ain't dumb.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: Where are you going to be back in the ship.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: We'll be waiting for you. Back again. In the control
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: cabin with Banner, Harcraft was about to congratulate himself on
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: inventing the apprentice system when a piercing scream brought both
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: men to their feet. It's Arnold, Bernard said, Arnold, Are
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: you all right? Hartcraft pushed Banner away from the speaker. Arnold,
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: what's wrong? You okay? The speaker remained silent. You better
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: suit up, Banner said quietly. Yeah, Harcraft said, staring dumbly
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: at the speaker. Yeah, I better suit up. Wait, better
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: take a look on the viewscreen. Hey, he's coming this way. Quick,
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: get ready at the airlock. It was fifteen minutes before
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: they could get anything out of him, and then he
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: wasn't too coherent. They gave him an injection of herodine
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: to quiet him down, but his eyes still rolled wildly,
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: and all he could manage was big hunk of rock,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: Big hunk of rock, rock, quick monkey ships. Any idea
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: what he's talking about? No, Banner said thoughtfully. There was
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: a sizable meteorite that came pretty close while you were
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: on your way back to the ship. But I'd already
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: tracked it before either one of you went outside. How close? Hm,
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: visually a dozen kilometers. I guess I could run the
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: tape if you're velocities are almost the same, asked Harcraft,
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: who was now fiddling with the viewscreen controls. Yeah, shouldn't
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: be too hard to find. How about lugging bean bringing
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: back to his bunk. I'll run the tape, then you
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: can plot it on the screen. When Harcraft returned to
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: the control cabin, Banner had already plotted it on the screen.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: I'll say it's a big piece of rock about four
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: kilometers in diameter. Yeah, but nothing out of order. Uh huh.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: Let me turn up the magnification a little and see
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: if Banner watched his Hartcraft turn the control buttons skillfully
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: increasing magnification without losing hold of the view. Suddenly, the
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: object exploded into iridescence. Wha watch, Harcraft said. He bumped
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: the magnification as much as he dared the anchor Badian fleet,
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: said Banner between clenched teeth. They spent the next hour
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: scanning the ship's micro library for anything at all on
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: Anchor Baedian religious practices. There was nothing. Arnold awoke in
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: another hour and seemed remarkably free of hysteria. What do
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: you know about our friend's religious holiday, asked Banner. We
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: checked the library without any luck. Arnold scratched the side
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: of his face. Oh let me think. Yeah, I remember
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: they go home to celebrate spring. Like you said, they
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: all go home. Uh huh, they got to only time
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: they can mate, only place two. How long they stay?
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: I've heard it's about one of our months, but we
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: have to know exactly. That's all I know. Read it
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: someplace a long time ago. Can I go back to sleep, Now,
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: go back to sleep, said Banner. They spent the next
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: three hours maneuvering carefully around the asteroid. They took six
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: thousand feet of movies and stared at the projections for
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: another three hours. One thousand, seven hundred and thirty silvery
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: needles flashed reflected starlight into astonished wild eyes. At least,
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: whispered Banner. There's nobody there A lot of good that
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: does us. They'll be back from their home planet in
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: a few weeks, just as soon as the breeding season
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: is over. Why should they leave anybody here. There's not
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: a map in the galaxy that indicates the position of
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: this piece of rock, and we haven't any weapons. I
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: don't suppose the computer you can't compute an orbit without
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: at least one more reference point. Besides, we're four weeks
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: from any kind of fleet contact. Great. In other words,
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: they'll be back here ready to roll before we can
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: even tell anybody that we don't know how to find
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: it again. Right, and since there's not any room left
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: to park another ship of that size, it's a pretty
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: safe assumption that they're ready to roll Armageddon, muttered Harcraft.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: You sure we don't have anything to weapons? Yeah, we
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: have a pistol and three small nitro packs in a
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: locker someplace. You couldn't even blow your way inside one
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: of those ships, and if you could, it'd spent two
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: weeks and then blow yourself to hell before you know
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: anything about the armament. Okay, let's land and look around
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: go get Arnold. They cut off the sleds and plunged down,
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: landing between two of the ships before putting on suits.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: Banner sent Arnold to the locker to get the three
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: nitro packs. He hoped it would help him overcome the
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: terrible feeling of nakedness and impotence. They spent only a
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: little time out of the ship. There was nothing to
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: see that hadn't been seen before, and the heavy artificial
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: gravity generated by the alien ships, coupled with a maze
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: of deep crevices, made walking difficult and dangerous. Back in
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: the control cabin, Banner turned to Hardcraft. Any ideas ideas
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: you mean for saving Homo sapiens, I'm afraid not. I
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: simply do not feel up to saving six billion sentient
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: organisms today. I feel as you're getting hysterical, said Banner,
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: whose own tight, small voice was very audible. I got
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: an opinion, said Arnold. You guys, stop crying for a
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: minute and I'll tell you. It took him five minutes
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: to explain the whole thing. When he was through, both
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: Banner and Harcraft turned him down flat. Not a chance,
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: said Banner. It would take a week to set the
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: thing up and then it wouldn't work. Our best chance
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: is a long one, but maybe we'll make it. We're
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: four weeks away from any fleet contact, but it's the
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: only sensible course of action, and that makes it a
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: total of eight weeks with four to get back here.
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: That's two months, said Arnold. You think they're gonna wait
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: two months before they shove out of here? Maybe not,
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: Banner said, but that's the only thing to do, and
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: the sooner we get started, the better the chances. Let's
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: get going. You look here, Arnold began. No more opinions
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: being brained. You're not entitled to an opinion. You think
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: we should take your word for everything you told us.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: Tell me why you said yourself. You never had any training,
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: so you're guessing and hoping. It would take a staff
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: of two dozen highly specialized technicians to even evaluate your idea,
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: much less put it into action. Hell man, face it,
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: what do you know about geology, chemistry, mining, What do
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: you know about anything? Arnold pointed a trembling finger at Banner. Look,
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: I told you guys that I know rock, I know
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: plenty of gardening too. I gave you guys a chance
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: to say okay, but you still say no, I have
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: it your way, but we'll do it my way. Both
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: Banner and Harcraft found themselves staring into the barrel of
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: the ship's only weapon. Harcraft recovered from his astonishment quicker
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: than Banner. O K Bean, brain, have it your way. Quickly, casually,
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: he started for the cabin door. Then, with such speed
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: that Banner hardly saw the movement, he chopped down viciously
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: toward Arnold's wrist with the edge of his hand. Harcraft
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: recovered consciousness a half an hour later. Don't try that again,
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: little boy, said Arnold, with unconcealed hatred. I'll give you
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: another thirty minutes to catch your breath, then we all
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: go to work. It took ten days instead of seven.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: Under Arnold's close supervision, they made the ship perform like
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: a tractor, an air hammer, a foundation borer, and an
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: angle dozer. Once, when they told him that some particular
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: maneuver couldn't be done, he took the controls himself and
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: came so close to killing them all that Banner, out
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: of sheer terror, took over and made it do the
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: things Arnold decreed necessary. Finally, it was finished, two million
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: tons of potato fertilizer. One million tons of tractor fuel
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: combined into a slimy pulp lay jammed into the largest
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: crevice on the asteroid. A few hours later, they were
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: a thousand miles out in space. Now, asked Banner, Now,
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: said Arnold. With a viewscreen at maximum magnification, they watched
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: as the asteroid blew itself into a thousand million pieces.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: In the control cabin, a short week away from fleet contact,
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: Banner was still gloating over the movies. Look at these
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: before and after? How many metals do you think we
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: can carry on our strong manly chests. I really couldn't
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: care less, answered Harcraft. While you've been sitting there and
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: riching your fantasy life, I've solved the mystery of mysteries.
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: Out with it, okay. While our little friend has been
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: lying in his bunk, ruining his beady eyes on the
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: micro viewer, I've been asking myself significant questions. Question number one,
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: what kind of person does it take to survive the
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: inactivity and boredom of three, four, maybe six months in
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: a space can like this answer? It takes a highly
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: trained and conditioned person such as yours truly or yourself.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Arnold is obviously not such a person obviously, Question number two,
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: under what circumstances can a person as obviously intelligent as
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: Arnold manage not to become a highly specialized member of society?
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: And last, what kind of person can be so revoltingly
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: unspecialized as to know with fanatical certainty that the main
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: ingredient of a good potato fertilizer is ammonium nitrate, That
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: such a substance is rather ineffective as an explosive unless
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: you mix it with a good oxidizable material such as
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: diesel fuel, that a four square mile chunk of rock
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: is brittle, And don't forget to add another nice facet,
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: that he's a lot cleverer in the manly art of
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: self defense than you'll ever be. I acknowledge my humiliation,
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: and at the same time repeat my question, what kind
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: of person can be so unspecialized and at the same
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: time so miserably competent? I give up? Do you really
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: know the answer? I know this, I know that whoever
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: he is, it makes good sense to send somebody like
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: him along with two over specialized robots like us. Look
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: at us. You couldn't pull a cotter pin with a
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: pair of pliers if you knew what a cotter pin was.
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: As for myself, if I'd gotten that gun away from Arnold,
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: I'm not even sure I'd have known how to fire it,
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: which still doesn't answer any questions. There are still a
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: hundred places on our primitive homeland that proved the answer,
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: said Hartcraft thoughtfully, places where men spend half the year
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: working with vegetables and fertilizer and the other half breaking
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: rock with a sledgehammer. Yes, and there's probably no better
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: place than a cell to train for the isolation of space.
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: Uh huh. It also explains a certain familiarity with makeshift
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: explosives and weapons, and brother Bean Brain summed up Hartcraft wistfully.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: What better place in the universe to find asylum from
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: specialization and of unspecialist By Murray F. Yako