Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 3 - Episode 28 - Conformity…curse or a blessing
Transcript
- 0:01Welcome to the Good Morning From the Chicken Coop Podcast with
- 0:04Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and mastermind set
- 0:08coach. Filled with inspiration,
- 0:10distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
- 0:13cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
- 0:16of yourself you could ever imagine.
- 0:18Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
- 0:21her chicken coop along with all her chickens.
- 0:27Hey, everybody. Good morning.
- 0:29From the chicken coop. So today we're talking about
- 0:31conformity, and it sounds like such a word that most people
- 0:35just don't like. Whenever you use the word
- 0:37conformity, it sounds so heavy, and it sounds like you have to
- 0:41let go of things. The reality is you do have to
- 0:44let go of some things, whether it's within yourself, whether
- 0:48it's in how you're trying to do something.
- 0:50Conformity really is what it means.
- 0:53You have to allow something to. Say this.
- 0:55Is what I want you to do or this is how this should be done And
- 0:58then you fall into that pattern and you conform to very much
- 1:02like jello in a mold. Now the problem is people think
- 1:06I have to resist this all the time.
- 1:08I have to resist this all the time.
- 1:10But the truth is we all do it regularly.
- 1:13If we are part of a group, if we say we identify it on to how a a
- 1:19a group thinks we are conforming to their beliefs instead of our
- 1:22own. So we're we're stuck in a
- 1:25conundrum. Essentially we're stuck in a
- 1:27huge conundrum of saying yes, I don't, I I definitely don't want
- 1:32to conform. Yes, I want to be independent,
- 1:35yet we conform by putting labels.
- 1:38As we've talked about labels last week on ourselves, we
- 1:41conform in many, many different ways.
- 1:44So is it a bad thing? Well, everything always comes
- 1:48down to looking at it from both sides of the coin.
- 1:51Is it a bad thing? No.
- 1:53Can it be a horrible thing? Yes, it can it be It.
- 1:56Can it be a good thing? Sure.
- 1:57If you want to be shaped like the jello mold and if you are
- 2:01looking for something and you're trying to identify and as your
- 2:05role, like let's say you want to become a nurse, you have to go
- 2:08through the training for that and you have to conform to the
- 2:10rules of nursing. So in that case it serves your
- 2:14outcome. It's absolutely necessary and.
- 2:16Highly. Desirable to do that.
- 2:19And then there are other times when you want to be that
- 2:21creative and that inventor and you want to do things and you
- 2:24don't want it to be something that you conform to.
- 2:27You want to think outside the box.
- 2:29And then conformity is not necessarily a good thing.
- 2:32So where we get stuck in our head is when we start to think
- 2:38and believe and show up in a pattern that is rigid.
- 2:43So the conformity piece of this is not really the problem we
- 2:46believe it is. It's more about the rigidity of
- 2:49not being able to look at it and judge it.
- 2:51So as soon as we become rigid, we, you know, I've, I've used
- 2:55this metaphor before because it's such a good one.
- 2:57But any engineer will tell you if you are rigid and you are a
- 3:00bridge, taking people from where they are to where they want to
- 3:04go and that wind kicks up, you will crack, you will break and
- 3:08you will fall and kill people in the process.
- 3:11The same thing in in being a human.
- 3:14When you're rigid, you have these barriers of greatness
- 3:20because you only see it one way and there's no flexibility and
- 3:23conformity is no different. What that does to us, it's no
- 3:27different of how it brings that up.
- 3:28So what's so incredibly important to remember is that we
- 3:32have to look at ourselves. And we have to.
- 3:34Say OK, in my conforming or non conforming and pushing for that,
- 3:39am I actually doing things for the greater?
- 3:42Good of myself? Or am I just causing myself more
- 3:45frustration in the process? Because the reality is that
- 3:49conforming is not a bad thing. Rigidity.
- 3:52Sometimes is not a bad thing, sometimes it has to be rigid.
- 3:55But having the awareness to understand when to say, OK, now
- 3:59is not the time to be the jello in the mold, Now is just the
- 4:02time to be me, whether that's the liquid.
- 4:05State. Of the cello or the chopped
- 4:07state of the jello, whatever that may be.
- 4:09It's always looking at it and saying, okay, where am I right
- 4:13now? And being truthful with yourself
- 4:16about how you feel and if you can't make a decision on it
- 4:19right this moment because you're looking at it and you're saying,
- 4:22gosh, I just don't know if I can, I can do this.
- 4:24I don't know if I can conform. And then give yourself the time
- 4:27and the space to think about it and say, OK, I, I don't have
- 4:31either enough information or I don't have enough space between
- 4:37myself and the emotion that's driving right now.
- 4:40Because this is one of those deep questions that requires you
- 4:44get to a state of neutral or a. State of.
- 4:49Contemplation, which is very close to neutral, where it's not
- 4:52so heated anymore, where you're bringing yourself back to.
- 4:55I'm curious and I need to see how I feel about all kinds of
- 4:59things in this, and that helps immensely.
- 5:02So remember, it's not always a bad thing when someone says you
- 5:05have to conform, yet it. Can be.
- 5:07A terrible thing, all depending upon how you are contemplating
- 5:13your thoughts in that process, how you're formulating what
- 5:17you're point of position is. So always come back and check
- 5:21that point of position my friends.
- 5:23All right. I hope you have a blessed day
- 5:24and I will see you tomorrow. Bye.