Latest / The Spiritual Parent: Mindful Tools for Raising Spiritual and Conscious Kids / Bonus: Are Our Kids Born With Superpowers? Raising Highly Sensitive, Neurodiverse, and Spiritually Gifted Children
Transcript
- 0:00Carrie Lingenfelter: In my house, we have chosen to look at the strengths, the hypersensitivities and the ability to learn things so quickly that your brain jumps from one thing to another.
- 0:11Carrie Lingenfelter: We look at these sensitivities as superpowers.
- 0:14Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, maybe I am turning a blind eye to the challenges, but also I'm a speech therapist.
- 0:20Carrie Lingenfelter: I was born to look at the challenges, so I cannot turn a blind eye to them.
- 0:24Carrie Lingenfelter: They're still there.
- 0:25Carrie Lingenfelter: My brain is still dissecting.
- 0:27Carrie Lingenfelter: How do I help my kid become a better version of themselves?
- 0:30Carrie Lingenfelter: How do I help my kid to be a happy adult one day?
- 0:33Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, our brains are turned onto those pieces, no matter if we are living a mindful, positive life.
- 0:39Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not shutting it off.
- 0:41Carrie Lingenfelter: So when I talk about these positive pieces that we're turning to and looking at these as strengths and tools and as these amazing superpowers, that's because we are looking to empower my kids.
- 0:53Carrie Lingenfelter: Hi, conscious Parents, it's Keri here and I am here with a little info about raising our mindful kids.
- 0:59Carrie Lingenfelter: I've got some tips and tricks about breaking free of the box and becoming who you are and teaching your kids how to do that.
- 1:06Carrie Lingenfelter: Along the way, join us.
- 1:07Carrie Lingenfelter: I feel like I have been hearing a lot in a lot of places on Facebook and Instagram and YouTube a lot about kids who are neurodiverse, specifically autism in the more moderate level of autism, including nonverbal children, and how these kids are being born with amazing gifts.
- 1:26Carrie Lingenfelter: But as a parent that's raising kids who are under the neurodiverse umbrella and have other pieces, such as gifted and talented or even highly sensitive kids, I wanted to bring into our awareness this idea of these kids also coming in with gifts.
- 1:44Carrie Lingenfelter: So a lot of people have been focusing on kids with the moderate severities or the nonverbal pieces, but I myself was a highly sensitive child and grew up in a spiritual family where we were focusing on our gifts, learning about mindsets, learning about mindful tools, and I had all of these amazing guru books that my grandmother, my abuelita, was putting on my nightstand as a 20-year-old.
- 2:14Carrie Lingenfelter: But when you're 20, you don't have time for any of that.
- 2:16Carrie Lingenfelter: Anyway, looking back to what we were talking about, I was raised in that type of mentality and that mindset and I was born and these gifts were nurtured and looked at in our family as these amazing pieces of us, but I didn't necessarily have labels.
- 2:31Carrie Lingenfelter: Looking back, I was in the G&T side, definitely with the highly sensitive side.
- 2:36Carrie Lingenfelter: I want us to acknowledge these challenges that our kids are born with?
- 2:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Heck, yes, it can be a parent.
- 2:42Carrie Lingenfelter: It can be hard to be a parent raising a highly sensitive kid, raising a kid who maybe has ADHD and jumps from one activity to the next faster than other kids, or maybe is highly sensitive and highly scattered in their organization skills.
- 2:59Carrie Lingenfelter: These can be pieces that can be so hard.
- 3:01Carrie Lingenfelter: As a parent, and can feel like you're pulling your hair out day to day looking for that favorite water bottle because the back of water bottles don't work.
- 3:09Carrie Lingenfelter: All of these things can be hard and challenging.
- 3:13Carrie Lingenfelter: In my house, we have chosen to look at the strengths, the hypersensitivities and the ability to learn things so quickly that your brain jumps from one thing to another.
- 3:24Carrie Lingenfelter: We look at these sensitivities as superpowers.
- 3:27Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, maybe I am turning a blind eye to the challenges, but also I'm a speech therapist.
- 3:33Carrie Lingenfelter: I was born to look at the challenges, so I cannot turn a blind eye to them.
- 3:37Carrie Lingenfelter: They're still there.
- 3:38Carrie Lingenfelter: My brain is still dissecting.
- 3:40Carrie Lingenfelter: How do I help my kid become a better version of themselves?
- 3:42Carrie Lingenfelter: How do I help my kid to be a happy adult one day?
- 3:46Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, our brains are turned on to those pieces, no matter if we are living a mindful, positive life.
- 3:52Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not shutting it off.
- 3:54Carrie Lingenfelter: So when I talk about these positive pieces that we're turning to and looking at these as strengths and tools and as these amazing superpowers, that's because we are looking to empower my kids.
- 4:04Carrie Lingenfelter: So I have been connecting and as these amazing superpowers, that's because we are looking to empower my kids.
- 4:06Carrie Lingenfelter: So I have been connecting and hearing these messages since my kids were tiny babies and part of it was my brain would get so loud because I am a highly sensitive person and it can turn to our brain and our ego and our mindset and it's hard to hear our hearts that my messages started to get louder and louder, and louder, and those messages can be actions from my children.
- 4:29Carrie Lingenfelter: The way my husband or partner responds to my kids, the way my parents respond to my kids Can it bubble up things from my childhood Heck?
- 4:38Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, because parenting is often our biggest journey of things that we did not overcome or pieces of us that did not heal or we didn't grow in or learn previously, when we were younger children that are now coming up.
- 4:52Carrie Lingenfelter: So I want to give an example of how we're honoring these challenges and how what it looks like.
- 5:01Carrie Lingenfelter: So this is a two or three year journey of what I have been doing with my kids.
- 5:06Carrie Lingenfelter: So, yes, I've been doing it.
- 5:08Carrie Lingenfelter: My kiddo, my oldest kiddo just turned 10 a little while ago and we have been doing it for a huge piece of their lives.
- 5:15Carrie Lingenfelter: It was shortly after my kiddo my first kiddo, who's 10 now was born that I started to realize that my brain would turn on and I would get cycle into these scary things.
- 5:26Carrie Lingenfelter: Read what Not to Expect when Expecting Like hello.
- 5:28Carrie Lingenfelter: Talk about turning your brain into the scary side of things.
- 5:32Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, and so, luckily, I had all these spiritually connected people like my mom and my grandma and friends around me that said tune into your heart.
- 5:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Put away the baby books, look to your child.
- 5:44Carrie Lingenfelter: They're going to show you what they need.
- 5:45Carrie Lingenfelter: And it wasn't all happy walking through fields of roses and flowers as a parent.
- 5:50Carrie Lingenfelter: After that, it's continually coming back to the root of what I have created in myself, connecting to myself.
- 5:57Carrie Lingenfelter: Coming back to that Because day in and day out, it can be challenging.
- 6:01Carrie Lingenfelter: For example, 10 years later, speed forward and we've been practicing spirituality and mindfulness heavy duty in our house for about three years now.
- 6:12Carrie Lingenfelter: Even so, things still bubble up in me as a parent, because I'm a highly sensitive person and I'm an empath and I'm open to all the energy around us.
- 6:20Carrie Lingenfelter: My kids are starting to bubble up these energies and emotions because the school year is coming up.
- 6:25Carrie Lingenfelter: We have one more week where I live in Colorado, one more week until school starts and my kids are starting to bubble up these highly sensitive people like, oh, school's coming, I'm not ready for it.
- 6:35Carrie Lingenfelter: I want to stay outside.
- 6:36Carrie Lingenfelter: I want to play, I want to be connected with mom.
- 6:38Carrie Lingenfelter: I love this environment.
- 6:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, I want to stay in my house, sheltered and connected.
- 6:42Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, I want to stay in my house, sheltered and connected.
- 6:44Carrie Lingenfelter: It's the easiest right I can be.
- 6:46Carrie Lingenfelter: I can be myself.
- 6:48Carrie Lingenfelter: I don't have to worry about other people's energies.
- 6:50Carrie Lingenfelter: I don't have to worry about where I can't control my environment.
- 6:51Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, yes, I know these things are bubbling up in our house.
- 6:54Carrie Lingenfelter: And still, my husband and I decided we were going to go backpack camping and we had never done it in our lives.
- 7:01Carrie Lingenfelter: I had never done it.
- 7:02Carrie Lingenfelter: He had done it, my husband.
- 7:03Carrie Lingenfelter: Luckily, he was an Eagle Scout, so he's done a lot of it and he was our rock right.
- 7:08Carrie Lingenfelter: This is a highly sensitive mama going into the woods with two highly sensitive kids and highly sensitive husband.
- 7:13Carrie Lingenfelter: He's the only one that knows what to do.
- 7:16Carrie Lingenfelter: He's the only one that knows how to use a jet boil to make a meal.
- 7:19Carrie Lingenfelter: Like I don't know.
- 7:20Carrie Lingenfelter: There's a package it's freeze-dried food.
- 7:22Carrie Lingenfelter: Like what am I going?
- 7:23Carrie Lingenfelter: So I had to release control, which is really hard for a highly sensitive person.
- 7:31Carrie Lingenfelter: My kids were going to have to release control.
- 7:35Carrie Lingenfelter: They were following us, they were living by us.
- 7:39Carrie Lingenfelter: When our kids kids like this maybe want to control their environment, they want to be in control, they want to fight you telling them what to do.
- 7:47Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, and when you're in an outdoor environment like this, it can be life or death If they're getting too close to the water and you're like, let's back up, let's back up.
- 7:54Carrie Lingenfelter: Like these things are serious, right, when you're out and about and you've got animals.
- 7:58Carrie Lingenfelter: And where we were going, there were like signs, 20 signs and also 20 rangers we met while we were hiking with our giant backpacks, like did you know there's a bear?
- 8:08Carrie Lingenfelter: We've been having a bear problem this year and it's right where you're camping, right, where you're camping, there's a bear problem.
- 8:13Carrie Lingenfelter: But do you have your bear box?
- 8:15Carrie Lingenfelter: Did you put your food in your bear box.
- 8:16Carrie Lingenfelter: Are you going to eat?
- 8:17Carrie Lingenfelter: 50 steps away?
- 8:17Carrie Lingenfelter: Okay Right, talk about fear.
- 8:20Carrie Lingenfelter: It's bubbling it up even as I talk about it.
- 8:25Carrie Lingenfelter: So we were going into this moment and we were building up and my husband was getting the gear ready and the pack was going to weigh 30 pounds but I have back problems, so my husband was taking all the weight I don't even know what his pack weighed like 70 pounds.
- 8:37Carrie Lingenfelter: My son, the 10 year old, he was taking his pack and you know he's a kid so we can only give him a certain amount.
- 8:43Carrie Lingenfelter: And then the tiny seven year old she was carrying a pack more for fun.
- 8:46Carrie Lingenfelter: She had all the snacks, but in a little water.
- 8:49Carrie Lingenfelter: As this was all building up, I went to a healing with my girlfriend who does Qigong and I was sitting there with her and she has an older version of kids, which is amazing because I can see my future, an older version of kids that are so similar in some ways to my son.
- 9:04Carrie Lingenfelter: It was so wonderful to connect with her and say am I going to survive?
- 9:09Carrie Lingenfelter: What do I do to stay grounded?
- 9:11Carrie Lingenfelter: Help me, because I'm getting in my head, things are getting a little nerve wracking and she said, we're going to create a bubble of gold.
- 9:19Carrie Lingenfelter: Thank you, anne, for your help in this.
- 9:21Carrie Lingenfelter: By the way, we're going to create this bubble of gold protection.
- 9:25Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to picture that protection and we're going to say everything's going gonna stay out of it ticks, mosquitoes, giant thunderstorms with lightning, bears, cougars, you name it we'll put it outside of the bubble.
- 9:40Carrie Lingenfelter: It's not?
- 9:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Oh, moose, let's not forget moose.
- 9:42Carrie Lingenfelter: We're gonna put that outside of the bubble and you are going to live in the moment.
- 9:49Carrie Lingenfelter: So.
- 9:49Carrie Lingenfelter: So I'm thinking this in my mind bubble, we're going to put the bubble up.
- 9:52Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm telling my kids bubble, we're going to put the bubble up.
- 9:55Carrie Lingenfelter: So we get there and we're driving around trying to find a parking spot and I'm telling my kids oh, let's use our positive mindful tools.
- 10:01Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, we're going to picture the spot.
- 10:02Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to find the.
- 10:03Carrie Lingenfelter: Oh, we found the parking spot.
- 10:04Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, it works.
- 10:05Carrie Lingenfelter: Guys, okay, now all of us are going to white and gold light of protection.
- 10:11Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to picture roots growing deep into the earth.
- 10:15Carrie Lingenfelter: We're doing all of our energy work so that we can feel connected.
- 10:18Carrie Lingenfelter: Then I tell them about picturing the gold and bubble of protection.
- 10:23Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, all of these things are tools of mindfulness and tools of meditation that we are picturing so we can feel empowered to go out into the wilderness by ourselves, with no cell phone protection.
- 10:37Carrie Lingenfelter: We were walking along, we were carrying the shelter on our backs.
- 10:40Carrie Lingenfelter: We're making jokes.
- 10:41Carrie Lingenfelter: When my daughter's like, how long are we going to get there?
- 10:44Carrie Lingenfelter: The seven-year-old, we're like, well, guys, don't worry, don't worry, mom's got the dad's got the house on his back, mom's got the kitchen on her back.
- 10:51Carrie Lingenfelter: So we've got all the things we need here and it's getting a little heavy.
- 10:55Carrie Lingenfelter: At least you don't have the kitchen.
- 10:56Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you want to carry the kitchen for me, sissy?
- 10:58Carrie Lingenfelter: No, I don't want to carry the kitchen.
- 10:59Carrie Lingenfelter: Okay, cool, then let's keep going.
- 11:01Carrie Lingenfelter: So we were working on showing them how to live day to day.
- 11:07Carrie Lingenfelter: In the moment we're not thinking about oh, I see those clouds building up.
- 11:12Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, my husband and I Note the clouds.
- 11:14Carrie Lingenfelter: We've got the rain gear out.
- 11:15Carrie Lingenfelter: Note the clouds, let's do function first.
- 11:19Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to think of number one first.
- 11:21Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to build the shelter first.
- 11:23Carrie Lingenfelter: So we get the shelter up.
- 11:24Carrie Lingenfelter: We're walking around, we run into somebody that we know while we're camping and we're like thank you, universe, for having this back of family, literally 15 feet away from us, that we know how random, but I guess not that random, because everybody we know backpacks too as well.
- 11:42Carrie Lingenfelter: So we are also looking for living in the moment, day to day, moment to moment.
- 11:50Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not in the moment, day to day, moment to moment.
- 11:53Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not projecting the problems.
- 11:54Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not going to continue to focus on the scary thing that could happen.
- 11:56Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not going to continue to focus on not having our cell phones.
- 12:00Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not going to project what could be scary.
- 12:04Carrie Lingenfelter: We're not going to live in our mind and get bubbled up in that emotion and that right, it just continues down the road.
- 12:11Carrie Lingenfelter: It's like this giant avalanche of emotions that we don't need.
- 12:15Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to focus on staying in our heart.
- 12:17Carrie Lingenfelter: We're going to focus on yep, feel some raindrops.
- 12:20Carrie Lingenfelter: Okay, we'll get the rain gear out.
- 12:22Carrie Lingenfelter: Good thing we got the tent up.
- 12:24Carrie Lingenfelter: Hey, my husband knew sensitive kids.
- 12:26Carrie Lingenfelter: He brought this rain shelter fly that we put up between the trees so we could have dinner and not have to worry about the rain.
- 12:33Carrie Lingenfelter: We're focusing on that.
- 12:35Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm telling my husband thank you so much for helping to show me how to make food with a jet boil.
- 12:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Actually, you made it and I was the backup with helping with the kids, but we are monitoring how our kids are handling the situation because, yes, we can't control this outdoors and we are supporting their needs.
- 12:54Carrie Lingenfelter: We're helping them to see if they are starting to decompress, needing to decompress, if they're starting to get agitated, unnerved, bothered by the wind, bothered by the lightning, as we start to go to bed.
- 13:06Carrie Lingenfelter: And we have done all of our.
- 13:09Carrie Lingenfelter: We have done all of our guided meditations.
- 13:12Carrie Lingenfelter: Even though we're in this tiny tent in the middle of nowhere, we are doing all of the things that we normally do at home and we are empowering our kids by being there.
- 13:21Carrie Lingenfelter: We did not shelter them by staying home.
- 13:24Carrie Lingenfelter: We took them outside and we put all of our mindful tools in place for ourselves to help us and to help them.
- 13:32Carrie Lingenfelter: So I want us to think about these kids that are coming in today.
- 13:36Carrie Lingenfelter: They are born with amazing gifts.
- 13:39Carrie Lingenfelter: I myself, in the 80s, I was born with amazing gifts too.
- 13:42Carrie Lingenfelter: But you know what?
- 13:44Carrie Lingenfelter: The world was really heavy at times.
- 13:46Carrie Lingenfelter: The world can feel really intense.
- 13:49Carrie Lingenfelter: Heavy at times, the world can feel really intense.
- 13:54Carrie Lingenfelter: When I was going to college, I was one out of 300 people trying to get a spot for 22 for grad school.
- 13:57Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you think I focused on the 350 people.
- 14:00Carrie Lingenfelter: No, I focused on the 22 spots and I focused on seeing what I was going to achieve.
- 14:06Carrie Lingenfelter: So our brains can easily especially when we're gifted and talented ADHD, have autism, are highly sensitive.
- 14:13Carrie Lingenfelter: All of these different pieces that fit into the neurodiverse umbrella or the highly sensitive child piece.
- 14:19Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm separating those because right now they're separated, but I don't know.
- 14:22Carrie Lingenfelter: I feel like they're also a little bit conjoined right.
- 14:26Carrie Lingenfelter: So when we are watching these kids develop, it's so easy for these active minds that are firing.
- 14:33Carrie Lingenfelter: They're absorbing knowledge very quickly.
- 14:35Carrie Lingenfelter: They're wanting to understand the world very quickly.
- 14:38Carrie Lingenfelter: They're born spiritually connected, asking why does this happen, mom?
- 14:41Carrie Lingenfelter: What happens when I do this?
- 14:43Carrie Lingenfelter: Where did we come from?
- 14:44Carrie Lingenfelter: Mom?
- 14:45Carrie Lingenfelter: Do dogs think about the future?
- 14:47Carrie Lingenfelter: Do they live in the now?
- 14:48Carrie Lingenfelter: My seven-year-old asked me that today.
- 14:50Carrie Lingenfelter: So when they are born spiritually connected and they are so fast-paced, I can't even keep up with my daughter.
- 14:56Carrie Lingenfelter: That's what I asked Qigong was please give me some energy to keep up with this girl.
- 14:59Carrie Lingenfelter: It is easy for them to become anxious.
- 15:03Carrie Lingenfelter: It is easy for them to get into that overactive mind that is powerful and moves fast and moves faster than the human body can move.
- 15:11Carrie Lingenfelter: It is easy for these little people to want to disconnect from their body.
- 15:17Carrie Lingenfelter: The body is hard.
- 15:19Carrie Lingenfelter: It's cold outside.
- 15:20Carrie Lingenfelter: It got really freaking cold when we were camping.
- 15:23Carrie Lingenfelter: You guys, I was freezing.
- 15:25Carrie Lingenfelter: But here's what happened Our son woke us up.
- 15:28Carrie Lingenfelter: Another tangent about this.
- 15:29Carrie Lingenfelter: Our son woke us up at 2 am and said guys, I have to go potty and I have to go potty now.
- 15:33Carrie Lingenfelter: I have to go to the restroom right now.
- 15:34Carrie Lingenfelter: Get outside, guys, I can't go outside.
- 15:36Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm like okay, okay, we're getting up, we're getting up.
- 15:38Carrie Lingenfelter: There was no warning.
- 15:39Carrie Lingenfelter: It wasn't.
- 15:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Hey, mom, wake up in two minutes, I need to go to.
- 15:42Carrie Lingenfelter: No, it was like now, right, these kids move fast.
- 15:45Carrie Lingenfelter: Now we walk outside.
- 15:47Carrie Lingenfelter: And, yes, I'm freezing, yes, I want to scream.
- 15:50Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, I'm upset that he woke me up.
- 15:52Carrie Lingenfelter: And it's very wet outside because it has been raining all night.
- 15:55Carrie Lingenfelter: Husband and I look up at the stars in the sky and we're like whoa.
- 15:59Carrie Lingenfelter: Thank you, buddy, for waking us up at 2 am so we could see this.
- 16:05Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you understand how tiny we feel in this giant universe?
- 16:09Carrie Lingenfelter: What a gift this is to see this so connecting with our kids and teaching them, these mindful moments.
- 16:16Carrie Lingenfelter: That is what these neurodiverse, highly sensitive kids, with any labels are needing, and it's not just our moderate level kids with autism, our nonverbal kids, it's all of our kids.
- 16:29Carrie Lingenfelter: And guess what guys?
- 16:30Carrie Lingenfelter: Majority of our kids are somewhere on this spectrum.
- 16:33Carrie Lingenfelter: They're somewhere in this highly sensitive area.
- 16:36Carrie Lingenfelter: Because these kids are coming in louder and more vibrant.
- 16:40Carrie Lingenfelter: Any of you maybe have heard of Dolores Cannon.
- 16:44Carrie Lingenfelter: She talked about indigo children and how each generation is getting louder and louder and getting more and more gifts as they come.
- 16:52Carrie Lingenfelter: They're more intense and they're more vibrant.
- 16:54Carrie Lingenfelter: So we will listen to them.
- 16:55Carrie Lingenfelter: So let's help them so they can stay spiritual and consciously connected into adulthood, because the world is a hard place as a human and we don't want them disconnecting from themselves.
- 17:07Carrie Lingenfelter: We want to keep them in their bodies, keep them grounded.
- 17:10Carrie Lingenfelter: So continue to connect with us and continue to come along this journey with us as spiritual parents.
- 17:16Carrie Lingenfelter: Signing off live session complete.
- 17:19Carrie Lingenfelter: Well, that's a wrap.
- 17:20Carrie Lingenfelter: Thanks so much for tuning in Changemakers.
- 17:22Carrie Lingenfelter: This is Keri, and if you haven't done a review for us five stars and a little few words about what you've enjoyed in our podcast episodes we would really appreciate it.
- 17:32Carrie Lingenfelter: If you guys would like to ever message me, I would love any questions you have or any feedback.
- 17:38Carrie Lingenfelter: At info at hearttoheartlifecom.
- 17:42Carrie Lingenfelter: We also have a brand new website which we're super excited to share it's hearttoheartlifecom.
- 17:46Carrie Lingenfelter: We also have a brand new website which we're super excited to share it's heart to heart lifecom.
- 17:48Carrie Lingenfelter: Thanks so much for tuning in and happy life, happy times, change maker families.
- 17:53Carrie Lingenfelter: Bye.