Latest / Untraditionally Lala / An Unlikely Affair: Orange You Glad She Showed Up?

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An Unlikely Affair: Orange You Glad She Showed Up? · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Hi Amber, Hilelah, Welcome to an unlikely affair. Hello, my
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: love Slala Kent, Hi Amber, Hi baby.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Are we alive and well? We are kind of alive.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: We're well though.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah we did twat seed and you had a moment
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: of crying. I've learned to not ask you.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: Are you crying anymore? Are you gonna cry?
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Wait?
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Are you an easy crier? You know what? I ecause,
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: me and Laala are not. Why would cry away?
• 0:34
  Speaker 4: I'm a cancer, So I'm always crying about something. But
• 0:36
  Speaker 4: I feel like in the last year I've done so
• 0:39
  Speaker 4: literally so much. I call it like, uh like melting
• 0:43
  Speaker 4: my like just thawing of my So I cry less.
• 0:47
  Speaker 4: But every once in a while I'll get a little surprised, like, oh, yeah,
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: that still still bothers me.
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it still bothers me. Yeah yeah yeah.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: But you guys, well, you guys recognize that voice. We
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: are going to Bottle Rock Music Festival and we're here
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: with Tamra Judge as our guest. Hello, gorgeous, Hello, birthday twin,
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: birthday twin.
• 1:08
  Speaker 4: But you guys have the same exact many many many
• 1:11
  Speaker 4: years apart with that face.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: But is our birthday? What about your moon? Do you
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: know what your moon is your so your Amber? Okay,
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: you know what it means to be a virgo? Well
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: you are looking at it? Yeah, okay.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: So I'm very excited to talk to you. We have
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: so much in common. We just did your podcast, myself
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: and Amber, and I just have to ask you. You've
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: been in this game where your reality is now for
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: everyone to judge and pick apart, and they see such
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: a grain of sand on the beach of your life.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Yea, how do you keep it together? I don't ask
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: my husband. I don't. I will say that.
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: I have been used to just being that outspoken person
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: on the show that just says it like it is
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: and doesn't hold back.
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: And I get a lot of shit for it.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: I don't make up stories, I don't lie, I don't cheat,
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: I don't do anything.
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: But I will call somebody.
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: I got a lot of shit from the fans. Yeah,
• 2:19
  Speaker 4: but that's why they're watching it.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: So, but that's what's so interesting is there was a
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: period of time that Tamra was not on the show,
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: and this is what always happens. Everyone's like, get rid
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: of them, and then they pick the most boring cast members.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: They're like, we just want to watch this.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: We're like, bitch, if you were just watching that, you
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be watching. And then everyone was begging for you
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: to come back. Yeah, you come back, and the ratings
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: went up. Of course they did, because you're fantastic to
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: watch and I know you on a personal level. Like
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: we talk about things that have not aired, we talk
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: about things that are going on in and I always say,
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: there's a difference between reality and reality, right, we talk
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: about the other part of reality.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: Sure, but I just feel like, no matter what job
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: I've ever had in my entire life, I don't care
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: if I was fifteen years old, I'm working at Burking.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was giving it everything I had. I worked
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: my way up. I was a hard worker. I was
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: a team player.
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: I did everything I could to make a drive through
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: cashier at that time.
• 3:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: Right, So when it comes to reality TV, I did
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: everything Like they would come to me and say ask that,
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: do that, and I would do everything I was asked
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: to do.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: And I was very just transparent.
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: I don't give a shit if you think I'm an
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: asshole for saying what I said or doing what I did.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: In my mind, I'm like I'm just doing my job, right, right, yeah,
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: and so and then I get the backlash. I get
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: that you're mean, you're horrible, and in my mind, I'm like,
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: but I'm just like doing my job. Like I'm just
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: doing my job. So it's like it's a double edged sword,
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: for sure.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: No, it definitely is, which is why I stay completely
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: out of the comments section.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: Oh I do too. Now I don't even read them.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: Because if you don't see it, it doesn't exist. Well, it doesn't.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: If I don't see it's not gonna fact my life.
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. The social media part of it and technology
• 4:04
  Speaker 4: part of it has allowed people to cross and say
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: things that are just so beyond inappropriate.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: Now, did you.
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: See a difference, because obviously you're in scripted TV, do
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: you get that same treatment.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: That I didn't?
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: You know this, this brought me back to when I
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: was on a soap opera back in the day, all
• 4:22
  Speaker 4: my children, but fans. I used to go to all
• 4:24
  Speaker 4: these little conventions across you know, the United States, and
• 4:27
  Speaker 4: the fans literally cannot see the difference between you as like, Okay,
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: that's Amber Childers and that's Colby Chandler. You are Colby
• 4:35
  Speaker 4: Chandler and they will come up to you, and they will.
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: I remember Colby Chandler, you do, I do?
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: My god?
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Can I tell you the most wild story about this?
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: It was during that soap opera the screen test. You
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: were so young, right, How old were you?
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: I was well, I screen tested twice for that one show,
• 4:55
  Speaker 4: so one time I was fourteen, then fourteen fifteen s.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: It was between Amber and my best friend. Do you
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: remember that Adam Sander movie Grown Up to the hot
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: girl over the car?
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: That's her?
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: So how wild that our paths were already crossing.
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: I know in teens me and you. That's crazy.
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: Have you guys seen the movie Crash. It's like a
• 5:23
  Speaker 4: really famous pace. It's about all these different lies and
• 5:26
  Speaker 4: and somehow on one day they all get intertwined.
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: And it's like it reminded me of that.
• 5:31
  Speaker 4: Like you just never know how you could be passing.
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: I don't know. It's true.
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: I truly believe and I always believe this, like everything
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: happens for a reason, and your your past cross for
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: a reason. And like you guys obviously had this weird
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: thing in your teens whatever and now dating the guy
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: and then married you were never.
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: Married, right, you guys? Know we never never married, but now,
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: like now you have a podcast together.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: I know it's such a beautiful, beautiful friendships.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: That is God's work, baby.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: So this is your what season? Are we coming up on?
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: A funny?
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, that's the longest standing because it's the
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: original to watch reality TV?
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: So OC is the original of all of.
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: Second give me, give me a second. Okay, okay, the
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: very first time reality like started popping off, my dad
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: was obsessed with OC funny.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: And I so you and Vicky and the other.
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: Girl, Gena King, the blonde one Peterson, Holy, Laurie Nogre
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: my best friend.
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: Oh right, so I just remember you guys on the show.
• 6:47
  Speaker 4: It's but again what we were just talking about, Like,
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: I didn't watch reality I would watch that though with.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: My dad at night.
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: I mean my dad was like religious, he like he
• 6:57
  Speaker 4: was obviously likes so fucking hot and but now look
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: at I'm sitting here across from you. That's life though,
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: Like it's so weird.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: It's all so I did. Okay, So this season, what
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: would you say? Because it airs July ninth, Thank.
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: God, very quick turnaround.
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: We just stopped filming a couple of weeks ago and
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: we are going to like we have less than two
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: months and we're airing.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: So it was a very quick turnaround.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: It is a quick turnaround because I just ran into
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: Terry and Heather at Craigs and she was.
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: Like, sure, we're just they're always there.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: Everyone is always at Craigs. Not me either. I never go,
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: but somehow every time I go, there's a Bravo face.
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like it's like the place to go to be seen, right.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: I guess I. I do the Early Bird.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: Specials on like, well when do they open? That's I do?
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: Now where's that far?
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: So I Eddie and I eat like at three o'clock,
• 8:04
  Speaker 3: and I mean it's so pathetic, but I.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: And then you have a snack before bed. No, we
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: go to bed like at eight o'clock. Yes, my kind
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: of household.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: Yes, So we go to bed at eight o'clock and
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: we'll watch a TV show and I'll pop a gummy
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: and he pops a gummy and we will be asleep.
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: I have a really into the personal question and you
• 8:26
  Speaker 4: don't have to answer it, or you can't.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: I'm so curious to know. I will do you so.
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: You So my head went to because I'm a sick
• 8:34
  Speaker 4: fuck sometimes like sex being the desserve.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: I was just wait, so seummies have ruined our sex lives.
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: Oh see, you have to have sex before the gummy.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you can't wait. So we in fact, we talked
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: about it this season on the show. But so what
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: happens is is we were very into just working out
• 8:55
  Speaker 3: in life and all these things. So we get up
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: very early, we go to the gym, all the things,
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: you know, but we go to bed pretty early. And
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: I've noticed since well, obviously I'm postmenopausal, so my hormones
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: have dropped drastically, like I have no testosterone.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: I'm working on it.
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: Are you taking it's a podcast, I'm working on it.
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: Yes, I met, like it's actually part of my season, right.
• 9:20
  Speaker 3: So I do believe that gummies have not helped our
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: sexual relationship because I feel like we go to bed
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: and we'll pop a gummy and then all of a sudden,
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: it's like you have a window of opportunity, like fuck
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: it now and.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: Have thirty minutes before it kicks it do it now,
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: or it's like by the way I get you in
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: the morning.
• 9:44
  Speaker 4: That could be fun sex, though sloppy, like half little
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: fuck up, like limp, dick is that?
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: Is it hard? Yet? Like there's a whole lot. I mean,
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: why is this slug on my vagina? Push in a slug? No, No,
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: just can't do it. No, no matter what you.
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: Do, it always finds its way to pop out.
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: Yes, you're like exactly. It's like and then you're like,
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: can't you get hard? Do I not turn you on? Oh? Yeah,
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: it's automatically me.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to conquer that of like, if you can't
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: get hard, this doesn't ever happen.
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: But if it dead, she's living through me.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Well, men in their like mid twenties to what I've
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: been with.
• 10:34
  Speaker 3: Their mid they're not men in their mid twenties.
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: I'm just gonna throw it out there. They can't get
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: a boner, then they're never gonna get it. Hasn't happened.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: I've been with someone who needs a blue pill.
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: Anyway, you don't.
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: Have your problem, not mine, right exactly, you're exactly, But
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: I will say, like, I will agree with that. When
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: you take a gummy at seven o'clock at night, there
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: really isn't much sex happening.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: So then let me ask you, because you've been married
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: for how many years.
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: We've been together for We've been married for thirteen years.
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: Next month, we've been together sixteen years.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: So when you guys are at your your peak where
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: you both feel comfortable, where you're having enough intimacy where
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: you're like we're on a good path, how many days
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: a week would that be?
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: Okay?
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: Well, back in the early days, like we would have
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: sex for like five hours. It was like I remember
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: the crazy thing we were talking about, the five hour
• 11:30
  Speaker 3: energy shot or whatever, like like he would we would
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: just do it all the time. But now we've been
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: together sixteen years and I'm in my fifties, he's in
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: his fifties, and hormones change and life gets busy, and
• 11:43
  Speaker 3: you know, like he's always going to be there, and
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: you're like gay tomorrow, Like there's a lot gay tomorrow.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: They're like, you don't have like that. I don't know.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: It's like you don't.
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: It's not like when you're younger where you would like
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: want to fuck the arm of the couch. Yeah, I
• 11:59
  Speaker 3: mean like so now it's like it's more work and
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: this is something that we're navigating through now.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: It's like, I love you. We spend all the time together.
• 12:08
  Speaker 3: Right, always throw both work out of the house where
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: best friends we work, and I said to him, said
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: to him, I'm like, I feel like our sex life
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: is lacking.
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: So but you don't ever find a moment where you
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: like catch him doing something or like you're disturbating. No, no,
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: just like maybe doing something like wiping the counter without
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: his shirt eye and you're like, oh, and you don't
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: like get that feeling like oh I need to Like
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: yeah I.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: Do, I absolutely do. And then I'm like, okay, I
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: gotta go.
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: By the way podcast, when you when you get your
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: hormones situated, you could like you'll want to.
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: Fuck like a rub right, So I have no testosterone estrogen,
• 12:44
  Speaker 3: like I have zero zero, and then I also have
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: I just found this out a genetic situation where I
• 12:53
  Speaker 3: have no dopamine.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: Oh and it's genetics.
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: So like you know, like I'm very even kill I'm
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: just like, yeah, do I cry once in a while?
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: Do I laugh once in a while? Like I'm very
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: like even. And Eddie's like he gets so excited about
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: the stupidest fucking things.
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: He literally will turn on Instagram and I will hear
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: him downstairs and I'm like, what the fuck are you
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: laughing at? Like he gets excited and happy about everything.
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: He's like, that's like always excited, always, And I'm like,
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: why are you when.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: You're like irritated that he's excited, irritated.
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: That he's having fun on Instagram?
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: I understand, And I'm like, I wish I could be
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: that person, and I'm just not that you will be
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: though once you get that.
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm hoping.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I ask those questions because when you see people
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: who are like really fucking putting in the work, because
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: like you said, when you're first together, it's like you're
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: taking baths together, you're getting seck see for each other.
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like you do the whole.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: Thing, and then time passes, hormones change, and it's like,
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: what is the secret because obviously intimacy has to be there, Yeah,
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: what is the secret to it? Like, so that's why
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: I asked you, like, what what is a healthy sex
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: life for?
• 14:15
  Speaker 3: In all honesty, Like, I am now maneuvering through that
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: and trying to figure that out because it's always been
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: so easy for us for up until the last couple
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: of years.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: You've entured a new stage. Yeah, we entered a new stage.
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: We had a great sex therapist on and doctor Ian Kerner.
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: He's out of New York. And we learned something so
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: great about what like for play actually is, which is
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: not what we imagine it to be. It's like four
• 14:37
  Speaker 4: play starts hours days weeks before the lead.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: Up of having sex. I thought, I'm not so interesting.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: It was so great to hear.
• 14:44
  Speaker 3: Well, we had a so we so we finished filming
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: and then we decided to go to Big Bear for
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: a week and I noticed like we had been in
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: Big Bear, like we have no kids at home, which
• 14:54
  Speaker 3: is new for us. Ever since we've been together, we've
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: had kids in the house. So if he has recently
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: moved out in the past three month and we're in
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: Big Bear in like four days past, and I'm like,
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: we haven't even had sex. So I was I at
• 15:08
  Speaker 3: one point you have to become like intentional about it.
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, listen, I go, do you want to.
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: Go in the jacuzzi tonight?
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: Like, let's just go in the jacuzie and just like
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: hang out. He's not a big drinker, rarely drinks, and
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: so we go in the jacuzie and we ended up
• 15:20
  Speaker 3: getting in a fucking fight about our sex life, a
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: fucking fight, and I'm like, this is not like I like,
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: what the fuck is happening? Like we're fighting about it
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: and then it gets down like it was actually a
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: good fight because we don't really talk about it too much,
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: like neither one of us are big talkers. So he's like,
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: you don't understand, like sex is like an emotional thing
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: for me, like I have to like feel it, and
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: I just feel like you don't love me anymore and
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: you're not into me anymore. And he's very He's he's
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: like the pussy and the relationship, and I'm like the
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: hard ass guy. I am just like I because I
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: don't have dopamine and I didn't grow up like a
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: very touchy feeling family, and I'm just super busy that
• 16:06
  Speaker 3: I make him feel less. Then oh yeah, and it
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: really came out to that like, well, no, I'm not
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: pursuing it.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: In his eyes, I'm not pursuing it because I feel
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: like you don't want me, And I'm like, but you
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: don't want me, so why would I want you. He's like,
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: but you wear sweats every night, and I'm like, both,
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: you go to sleep at seven, Like it's like a fight.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: It needed to happen, though, No, it needed to happen.
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: You have sex every single day since. Then good for you.
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: Oh see, that's amazing.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: But sometimes you just have to have those uncomfortable conversations
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: where you're like, like you don't want to rock the boat,
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: but you don't want to be in denial, Like let's
• 16:42
  Speaker 3: have this conversation. And by the way, Eddie is not
• 16:45
  Speaker 3: a great person to talk about his emotions at all.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: Like I can stay calm and just be like, yeah,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: I'm fucking like that. You'd be like, what the fuck
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: you really think I'm fucking like that? Oh my god,
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: but you do this to me and oh, I can't
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: do this emotional I'm leaving.
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: I'm leaving, leave and I go fucking leave bye, bitch,
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: I like that. And then he's like, I'm so sorry,
• 17:06
  Speaker 3: I'm so sorry I upset you.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: Oh that is so sweet. Damn you're kind of a bitch.
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: I am such a hard Like my daughter's the same way.
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: But again, like we're talking about life. Sorry, life makes
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: you hard sometimes like that, so you have to like
• 17:20
  Speaker 4: intentionally tap in to being feminine and like sensual and
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: like and then you're just like, oh god, yeah, I
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: just want to put my sweats on.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: I know, well, I actually thought about you recently La
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: during sex.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah oh the room. No, but you made a comment
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: about Schwartz.
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: You're like, he's not the guy that's like choking you
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: out and doing all these things, And I'm.
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: Like, fuck, do I need to be choked out?
• 17:45
  Speaker 3: Like? It depends on what you know what I mean, like,
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: am I not having that crazy sex life?
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: You know what?
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: I used to think that if you were not having
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: just fucking like animalistic sex, that it was boring.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: Jungle fucking is what I shall jungle fucking.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: I used to think, like, oh, you're boring, You're a square,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: You're basic. And just like as I've gotten older, there's
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: a time and a place and a mood for everything.
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: There are times where I'll be with someone where I'm like,
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna need you to fucking leave a mark on
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: my ass and I'm gonna need to not breathe.
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: For a second. Go there.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, Then there are moments where I'm like, I
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: just want to be like loved on, Like I need
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: softness sex with Eddie. If you're afer for Eddie, for
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: eddiewhere Eddie, fuck you.
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: Beat out this episode.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: I know, I know, no but he's like the most loving,
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: caring guide. But the problem is is like if I
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: don't give him, if I don't match that energy. And
• 18:47
  Speaker 3: when I don't match it is when I'm filming, because
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: between doing the podcast like five days a week and
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: then have a new prep for it, record it, get glammed,
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: go do uh filming, and then you know, prep for
• 18:59
  Speaker 3: the podcast the next more mean, He's like, I'm invisible
• 19:02
  Speaker 3: for these three months. I'm totally invisible. And he acts
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: like he understands it, but he doesn't. He like he
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: really gets his feelings hurt, like he feels neglected.
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: That is so sweet.
• 19:14
  Speaker 4: But you guys have been together for a long freaking time,
• 19:17
  Speaker 4: so you guys are doing something right and it's working.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I love them to death.
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: Like, and I'm the type of person. I don't know
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: if you're like this, Lalla, I don't know if this
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: is a virgo thing. But people fucking annoy the shit
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: out of me.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm getting there. I like an a guy thing.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: People do annoy me and I just go I don't.
• 19:32
  Speaker 3: I can't. I can't deal with that person. So like,
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: if they're chewing too loud or breathing too loud or
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: doing things. I'm like, you're fucking dumb, Like I like
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: people bug me.
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: You know what.
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: My my little one is uh a scorpio. And I
• 19:47
  Speaker 4: literally have to separate my kids when they eat dinner
• 19:50
  Speaker 4: because the chewing.
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: Oh that's me makes her.
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: And I was like, literally London over there, Riley over
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: everyone's eating and separate rooms like dogs.
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: It's you have to separate dogs with me.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: So I went, we're going to fight.
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: So you know, I actually went to a therapist. What
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: about this?
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: So I went to a therapist and I said, I
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: don't like to be touched. I can't have anybody talk
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: in my ear, like behind me. If somebody talks to
• 20:10
  Speaker 3: me on my ear, I'm gonna fucking die. When I
• 20:12
  Speaker 3: sit in a restaurant, I got to make sure nobody's
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: sitting behind me. And I did all these things, and
• 20:16
  Speaker 3: she goes, you really kind of sound like you're on
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: the spectrum.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: I was just gonna say, I think you're artistic.
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: So then I got slammed for it because I will.
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: I will if somebody eats in front of me or
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: talks to loud or does something, I will have to
• 20:32
  Speaker 3: leave the room because I will want to physically punch
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: them in the face. Like that's the visceral feeling I
• 20:37
  Speaker 3: have towards them, like I want to strangle you.
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: Right, it's so bad.
• 20:41
  Speaker 3: So she told me this, and I'm like consuming this.
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: And I had talked to her about my daughter and
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: the like the emotions I have with that. And then
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: on top of that, I said, I literally when we
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: eat dinner at home, I he knows, like an he knows,
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: he's got to.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: Turn the music on.
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: He's got to make sure because I will be like this, No,
• 21:02
  Speaker 3: that's Riley psychoize.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I'm like, she turns into like someone else, you know,
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: I want to punch somebody in the throat. Oh so
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: we'll punch you in the throat. What are you medicated
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: for it? I should be that, So I should be.
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: I should be. So I went.
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: So I went from I went to therapy where my
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: my you know, doctor is like, you sound like you're
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: you're on the spectrum.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: We need to text you test you. You're on the spectrum.
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: So I go back. I have fifteen minutes to leave,
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: and I go to a podcast with Teddy and it
• 21:34
  Speaker 3: was new. Therapy was kind of new for me at
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: the time, and I told her what the therapist said.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: I got fucking annihilated.
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: How dare you say that? Who do you think you are?
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: And all these things ripped apart.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: Because Stroy, you said what my therapist had told me.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and keep in mind it's the the reason it's
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: called the spectrum is because there are many layers and
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: many places that you can fall onto it.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: Correct, right, this is a professional.
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: By the way, I have adomational I have a daughter
• 22:05
  Speaker 4: who's on the spectrum, so I really know this very
• 22:07
  Speaker 4: That's why I said, like, are you when you said
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: that to me, I instantly thought, oh, like there could
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: possibly and like whil it was just saying you could
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: have a smidge And as women, we hide women who
• 22:20
  Speaker 4: are on the spectrum. They hide it so well because
• 22:24
  Speaker 4: our verbal skills are usually way above kids that are nonverbal,
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: and kids don't get diagnosed till they're fourteen, fifteen, and
• 22:31
  Speaker 4: sometime well into their twenties.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: So you know who's advocating for this right now? There's
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: many women, but a dear friend of mine, Brittany Cartwright,
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: who talks about early intervention and if you see certain
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: traits that just seem different, to take your child in
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: because again it's a spectrum. There's many places that you
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: could land.
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: There's like extreme and then there's and to this day,
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: like I'm like, I'm never talking about that like I
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: was normally.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: And we're having you turn about it right now. Okay,
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: it's okay.
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: I was not only was I in a horrible place
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: in my life, and then I was talking about it
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: with the therapist, and then I shared what the therapist
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: said to me. Then I got fucking annihilated publicly.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: And everyone was allowing you to go to therapy, and
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: you finally do when you share what you've learned about yourself, and.
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: People were like, fuck, yeah, you're that just a wire.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: I feel like you sharing this is extremely helpful because
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: you're not the only person who who is dealing with
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: something like that and going I don't have an answer
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: for this.
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: No, I got a lot of fucked up things in
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: my head.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: Well, you also you also had a very tough childhood,
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: and we and we watched you talk about that for
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: what nineteen years now, about where you come from, what
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: your home life was like.
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: And I think so often.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: People forget, even I forget, that's just how how human
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: beings are built.
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: But when you meet someone.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: Who maybe doesn't move the way you move, you forget
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: what experiences they've had in life to make them who
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: they are. Yeh, you're going to see this season on
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: the Valley with Nia, we have a long I think
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: you know, we're on episode eight or nine now, We've
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: got a long road ahead of us. And I just
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: find that if people can take a step back and remember, like,
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: there's a lot that went into making this person who
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: they are, and guess what, from now until next year,
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: there's going to be a lot of other shit that
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: shifts them again, right, absolutely, And I think that's what's
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: so hard about just being a person, but then being
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: on reality TV is we were talking about this how
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: you act maybe this season and what you believe in
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: and stand for. They can take a clip from ten
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: years ago and insert that and you are held to
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: that standard and put in that box for the rest
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: of your days.
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Now, I relatively had a good season this year. Great,
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: But also I film Ultimate Girls Trip twenty years right,
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: so I film that right before we started filming Orange County.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: Has that cast been released? Yes, it has.
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: So it's Kyle, it's Vickie, it's Luanne.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Oh, I saw all the content you guys were making.
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: Yes, so we did that and me and Channon have
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: this huge fight and we ultimately got fired so to speak,
• 25:15
  Speaker 3: or asked not to go to the season finale of
• 25:18
  Speaker 3: Ultimate Girls Trip. What yes, So in my mind I
• 25:22
  Speaker 3: keep thinking, holy shit, like I relatively, like, I mean,
• 25:27
  Speaker 3: as good as season as you can have, Like I
• 25:29
  Speaker 3: feel like it was.
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: It was a good season.
• 25:31
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, oh god, one month after we air,
• 25:36
  Speaker 3: Ultimate Girls Trip is gonna air at the same time
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: the show is, and I'm like, oh great.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: Like, oh my god, she's now a bitch, now a bitch.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Someone said to me, it's never the first impression, it's
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: always the last. We're always taught like first impressions.
• 25:51
  Speaker 3: It's the first episode of Ultimate Girls Trip. So they
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: have a whole season where I'm not in it.
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: So you only made it one day? Yeah one day? Wow.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: So this season we're gonna see Sophia. Yes, yes, I
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: think your guys' relationship that is her.
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: Where does Sophia fall? Youngest, middle youngest is the baby youngest.
• 26:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she's just such a good kid. She's a cool
• 26:23
  Speaker 3: chick living in a Orange County. Like she doesn't follow
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: the rules. She's not like, I'm gonna wear Lulu limon,
• 26:29
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna have straight blonde hair and have a crap
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: top on.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: She's like, no, it's just the daughter that yeah this morning.
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: So she's I love her.
• 26:36
  Speaker 3: She's edgy, she's cool, she's into music, she's in the art,
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: she's changing her hair color. She only thrifts all her clothes.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: She's just like such and she.
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: Sells clothes online like this girl like she doesn't even
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: have like a regular job, and she makes a ton
• 26:53
  Speaker 3: of money just selling clothes and doing different shit and
• 26:56
  Speaker 3: doing performances.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: And she's just such a cool chick. And you love
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: her boyfriend.
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: I love him so much. I'm like, if you guys
• 27:04
  Speaker 3: break up, on to be heartbroken, heartbroak.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: Long have they been together a year? And is this
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: her first? She's young, she.
• 27:12
  Speaker 3: Was a virgin when she met him. Wow, yeah, so
• 27:14
  Speaker 3: at twenty she was a virgin until she was twenty And.
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: I love this And is she going to talk about
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: this on the podcast?
• 27:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: I love this, you know.
• 27:22
  Speaker 3: And it was like a really weird moment for me
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: because she came up and told me, She's like, mom,
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: you know what I want to talk about like birth control.
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: I'm like, so you're having sex right, and she's like yeah.
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: And then there's like this freaky side of me.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: I'm like, is he doing it right?
• 27:37
  Speaker 3: Is touching? Is he touching in all the right spots?
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: Are you having orgasms?
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: Like?
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: Do you need me to teach you? Like I got
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: like all weird? I am that mom. I will be
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: that mom, and I like it.
• 27:49
  Speaker 4: I go there with my kids, my older one a
• 27:52
  Speaker 4: little bit, and they're like, they think it's so weird,
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: but I want that conversation. Yes, And what was she receptive?
• 27:57
  Speaker 3: Was she willing to like she's like told my kids
• 27:59
  Speaker 3: she said, I was fourteen when I was banging and
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: she was twenty when she started banging.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: So yeah, you know what, good on you. Yeah, you're
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: a fantastic mother. And I had a lot of STDs
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: in the relationships. Do you know what shit happen? I
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: was just banging. I'm like, yeah, you would have bang,
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: yell bang ye oh.
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: When I was my virginity, I was like frequenting planned
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: parenthood and then I would take all the free contents
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: and then they would break and I'd be like, I'm
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: back for planned.
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: Being they're like, la, la, we've seen you here before.
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, Like it just there's there's something And I want
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: to talk to my children when they're obviously much older. Yeah,
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: but losing your your first sexual experience tease you up
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: for how you look at sex for the rest of
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: your life. My friends who did not do it the
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: way that I did it have very unhealthy relationships with See.
• 28:51
  Speaker 3: That's also what I worry about, is like she obviously
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: has a great relationship with Nico, and this is the
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: first guy she's ever been with, and they talk about
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: getting married, and I'm like, you.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: Really want to be married the first guy you ever branged?
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: Like zoom. But then I'm like, I love the relationship.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: They're so cute together. He's such a good guy.
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: He's just like because from a very strict Catholic family,
• 29:17
  Speaker 3: still lives at home, very helpful at home, just a
• 29:20
  Speaker 3: good son, a good likely she.
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: Found her person.
• 29:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she found her person, which was so crazy because
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: she went through so much shit with OCD and anxiety
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: and high school during the pandemic and was depressed and medicated,
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: and she went through a lot of shit she went through.
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: And being so young, like how old was she when
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: you you split with her dad four, Like, that's such
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: a tough There's a part of me that's so glad
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: that I left when Ocean was only seven months because
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: she literally doesn't she won't know.
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: You're so lucky.
• 29:59
  Speaker 3: But even yeah, even Sophia at four, Like you know,
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: I had Sophia was four, Spencer who was nine or ten,
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: and then Sydney who was like twelve or thirteen, I
• 30:12
  Speaker 3: can't remember exactly, but around those ages, each one of
• 30:15
  Speaker 3: them dealt with divorce at different times in their life.
• 30:18
  Speaker 3: So Sophia never really had knowledge, remembered her dad and
• 30:23
  Speaker 3: us being together, right, So as she was the one
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: that it hit latest, it didn't hit her until Polly
• 30:31
  Speaker 3: middle school, wow, which it hit the other kids at
• 30:34
  Speaker 3: different ages, and each kid reacts to it differently.
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: So differently.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: I know, once you think like you've you've parented one kid,
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: you're like, oh, I know exactly what I'm doing. The
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: second comes are completely different human and then the third
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: comes and you're like, what the fuck I thought I
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: had this down. And each kid is so different you
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: need a new set of tools with each and every
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: one of them.
• 30:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel bipolar sometimes when I'm parenting like I
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: have to give, Like Lennon will call me and she
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: he just needs someone to like listen to and and hear,
• 31:02
  Speaker 4: and I get and then Riley she right, She's at
• 31:05
  Speaker 4: the age where I'm like Riley, like you better shape
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: up or ship out, Like it's so different, it's so
• 31:12
  Speaker 4: hard to like transition.
• 31:13
  Speaker 3: Well, I think that, like the biggest advice I give
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: to people going through divorce is like, love your children
• 31:17
  Speaker 3: more than you hate your ex. I just feel like
• 31:20
  Speaker 3: that's the best, because sometimes people hate their ex so
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: much that they involve their children without even knowing that
• 31:25
  Speaker 3: they are involving them. So just love your children so
• 31:29
  Speaker 3: much more than you hate your ex husband, because it
• 31:31
  Speaker 3: will only destroy the children.
• 31:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I do.
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: I love it. Sounds like you do. It sounds like
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: you both do. Yeah yeah, yeah. Well, thank you Tamra
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: so much. We have some parting to go do.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: Now, Yes, getting we're doing this. I feel like we're
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: just talking.
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: We're just just talking anyway. I love you.
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: Thank you you guys, Thank you for listening to another
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: episode of Unlikely Affair. Remember an Unlikely Affair airs every
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: Thursday night at nine pm.
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: Bye A That