Latest / Two Ts In A Pod with Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra Judge / We Should Talk About This

Transcript

We Should Talk About This · Two Ts In A Pod with Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra Judge

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: This is Teddy Teapot. Hi guys, welcome back to this
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: week's Teddy Teapod. You guys asked and we are delivering
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: the number one topic you guys wanted me to discuss
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: was eating disorders. So it's a sensitive topic, but it's
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: also something I truly believe talking about helps you continue
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: to heal and working on UM I had. I never
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: really had a great relationship with food until after my
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: son was born. So that's about five years ago. Um,
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: not about five years. I know how old my son is, guys,
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: he's five and a half. So that's how many years ago.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: That's when all in by Teddy was formed. But leading
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: back to even when I was a child, I started
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: riding horses from a very young age. And I remember
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: when I was about ten years old. UM, somebody said
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: to me, oh, you should you need to switch your underwear.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: You need to wear a thong because you can see
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: your underwear line through your riding pants. For those of
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: you don't know, if you compete UM as an equestrian,
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: you are wearing skin tight beige pants. And that's when
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: I started becoming aware of my body, UM in a
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: way that wasn't just like a regular kid, in my opinion,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: and I started realizing that food was something I wanted
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: to control. And I noticed that my sister and I
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: were developing differently, Like I would just start to gain
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: a little bit of weight, and my sister was always
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: tiny and she could kind of eat whatever, and you know,
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: I just that wasn't the case for me. And I
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: just remember being aware of it so much younger than
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: I would have thought that it would happen. So around
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: the age of play seventh or eighth grade is when
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: I started creating an unhealthy relationship with food. And it
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: became something where I will eat enough to get by,
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: but I'm not feeding myself the proper nutrition to do
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: it well. So I would be at a horse show
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: all day long and have something like two diet dr
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: peppers and to string cheese and maybe an apple, and
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: I was like, that's good, good enough, and I'm winning
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: so awesome, and people are noticing that I look different
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: and this is a win win, and it became sort
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: of this evil like reward slash. I started feeling like
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: pride and when people would say to me, you're doing okay,
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: like you look all right, you know. As I got older,
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: and then it became something that I couldn't keep up with.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: So there would be years where I would really limit
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: my food and then I kind of be like, I'm
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: sick of this, and then I would go the other direction.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: And that was kind of my entire high school life.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: And it really became around you know, how can I
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: hide it, or who are my friends that I can
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: kind of talk to about this and we can all
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: do it together, and it just it became an obsession.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: And you know, it wasn't to the point where I
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: was hospitalized or anything like that. It was just to
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: the point that it consumed a large part of my thinking.
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: And I started revolving my good days around how little
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: I could eat, and if I still one in the
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: competition that day, then it was a good day. Or
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: if I felt too weak and I made a mistake,
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: then it was a bad day and I needed to start.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: I started calculating my every move. So that was kind
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: of my youth. And then I at seventeen, I had
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: won a big national and had kind of my my
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: best year yet riding horses, and I had gotten a
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: college scholarship to go riding, and I told my parents,
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: you know what, I'm done. I don't want to ride anymore.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: I need a break. I don't want to live in
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: Hilton Head. I want to branch out. I want to do,
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: you know, do different things. Uh, you know, I'll still
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: go to college if you want, but I'm not going
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: under the riding scholarship. Well news flash, no colleges wanted
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: me if I wasn't going to ride horses. So I
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: didn't get into any of the colleges that I wanted
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: to go to. And so I was like, all right, well,
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna move to California. My parents said, great, you
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: can go. We'll help you move across the country, but
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: we're not supporting you once you get there. You need
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: to We're not financially supporting you. Once you get there.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: We need you to go and um, you know, we'll
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: help you get a car out there and stuff like that,
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: and but once you're on your feet, you need to
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: pay your own rent, that type of thing. And I
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: remember moving to Los Angeles seventeen and feeling so completely
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: lost and overwhelmed and not knowing anyone. I started in
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: the CIA mail room and everybody was like Harvard graduates
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: and blah blah, you know, when I was the seventeen
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: year old, and within the first year of moving to California,
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: I gained over eighty pounds. And it was complete emotional eating.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: I wasn't binging, like I wasn't going and hiding it.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: I just was constantly grazing, and I was constantly eating,
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: whether I was hungry or not. And then I would
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: go home at night and eat. And I remember um
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: coming to coming home for Thanksgiving and my parents not
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: really knowing what to say, just like, hey, you good,
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: and me being so angry, so angry that they could
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: even ask such a question, gen like what what you
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: don't like me? How I am? Take me or leave me?
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: And that's not what they were asking. I was putting
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: all of my own and securities and own you know what,
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: I would self sabotaging behavior. I was putting it on them.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: And you know, it wasn't until years and years later
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: that I started really understanding what I was doing. So
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: I was like that for you know, probably five years
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: and or eight years or whatever it was. And then
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: I um started riding horses again, and I went right
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: back to my old habits that I had as a kid,
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: as a you know, growing up I just started eating
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: very little, um, exercising a ton, riding horses a ton,
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: and the way it kind of came off. So once
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: again I was not having a healthy relationship with food
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: or my body image. But I was getting results and compliments.
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: So I was like, Okay, you know what, this is great.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: And I meet my husband and I remember on about
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: our third date, I took him on a like a
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: birthday dinner. And you know when you're at a birthday
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: dinner and there's like thirty people there, and a guy
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: sat kind of near us. And I had never mentioned
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: my past issues with food to my husband, and there
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: was a guy sitting there and I said, Hi, I'm
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: Teddy blah blah blah, and this is my friend Edwyn
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: and he goes, Teddy, h I knew a Teddy that
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: worked at sea. She was a fat and I remember
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: just like my heart sinking and feeling like, oh my god. One,
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: I can't believe he said that, And to what is
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: Edwin going to think? And three I've never told you know.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: It was like this deep, dirty secret that I thought
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: I was having to hide. And I looked at Edwin.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: I'm like, now I no idee like and it just
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: became one of those things. I would go home for
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: the holidays with Edwin and I would have my sister
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: hied photos of us because I didn't want him to know. Um,
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: I don't, I don't know. I think I was ashamed
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: that I was so out of control and felt so
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: lost and you know, these things were happening, and realizing
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: that either whether it's eating too little or eating way
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: too much, I really had no type of relationship with
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: myself or any honesty when it comes to how I'm
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: feeling and what I was actually doing to my body.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: But these crazy fat diets or starvation diets are fasting
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: or overeating or becoming a pizza hut V. I p
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: sad that that's a thing. Um. But once I had
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: my kids, everything kind of shifted for me. So when
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: I was trying to get pregnant with Slate, I had,
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: you know, obviously put on a bunch of weight. Um,
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: but that was fine, that's you know, I was happy
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: to do it. That I wasn't eating the world's best
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: when I was pregnant with her, but I was, you know,
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: I had a relatively healthy pregnancy, and then I didn't
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: lose the weight after slate. And then when I got
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: pregnant with Cruz, I had so much trouble getting pregnant,
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: as you guys have have heard and as I've shared,
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: and I was on all these IVF and blood thinners
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: and all of these things and gained even more weight.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: So the by the time that Cruz was born, and
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: you know, we were past like the first six months,
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: I realized, here I am in a place where I
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: have no idea how to teach my family, how to eat,
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: how to live because I didn't know how to do
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: it myself. I um, and that's the day I changed
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: my life. And I started learning and educating myself on
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: good things to fuel your body, on exercise and being
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: active but not working out, to pun yourself for the
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: things that you've eaten. And it became my life's mission
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: to do this. And being able to talk about this
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: is what's kept me healthy. Because when I wasn't able
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: to talk about it and it was everybody else's fault
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: or somebody was judging me or I was judging myself,
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: I couldn't get through it. And you know, oftentimes people
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: talk about and needing disorder and they're like, oh, you know,
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: you just move right on from it. You know, I
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: I had treatment and then I was better. It's not
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: it's something it's an ongoing battle that is forever within you.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: But if you're open with yourself, if you're open with others,
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: then you can grow and you can change, and you
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: can start to find the positives, and you can start
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: to find the good things about food, the nutritious things
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: that you could be eating, the things that really feel
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: your body, the different color food, how to prep your kitchen,
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: how to prep yourself for success. And yeah, so that's
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: really why I'm so passionate about this because it's something
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: that you know, until my son was born, I never
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: I never had a handle on And you know what,
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: I still won't say I have a hucent handle on
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: it because it's something that I work at every single day.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: So I'm super excited. Today we have guests from all
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: over the spectrum. We have Jessica Clark, who's been open
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: about bening and purging. We have Jackie gold Schneider, she's
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: on Real Housewives of New Jersey, who has been open
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: with her battle with anorexia. And then we also have
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: Christie Morrell, who's a nutritionist and registered dietitian. She is
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: a sports dietitian at USC and for the l A Kings,
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: So stay tuned for that. And um, we're gonna come
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: right back with Jessica Clark to share her story with us. Hi.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: Now we're on with Jessica Clark. How are you, Jessica,
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: I'm doing great. How are you? I'm good? Thank you.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: I appreciate you for coming on and sharing your story.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: I was just talking a little bit about mine and
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: I was saying, the biggest thing for me has been
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: being open and vulnerable and sharing and that's been the
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: one of the main factors and feeling healthy myself versus
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: when I was kind of hiding and in that place
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: in my life. And I was curious, if you'd be
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: open to kind of sharing your story with our listeners
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: and then we can kind of dig into some questions. Yeah. Absolutely, Um,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: I totally agree with that. I think a lot of
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: the healing that I've experienced and a lot of kind
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: of seeing the purpose of my story has come from
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: sharing it. So I definitely agree with that. Um. So
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: I in high school, I was a super competitive athlete.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: I decided I wanted to run talking across country and
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: college and so, um, my junior and senior year, I
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: was on a super strict eating plan. I would literally
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: have nightmares before races about like eating a cookie or
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: having a brownie or something like that. I would wake
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: up sweating and crying, and um, it was really it
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: was weird, and I didn't realize it was weird because
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: I was surrounded by other athletes that kind of were
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: doing the same thing. Um, So that kind of started
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: this unhealthy relationship with food. And then once I got
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: to college and I was running track across country competitively.
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: Um so I'm like, I'm five one, I'm a little human,
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: and I was running with girls that were five eight
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: and Paul and Lean and just were built very differently
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: from me. And so it kind of got to this
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: place where, um, it became like a real issue and
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: I would starve myself all day long so I would
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: look good in the spandex and the sports bras, and
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: running in the nighttime, I would just like it was
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: like an out of body almost of just like eating
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: anything in sight, and then I would purge and then
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: be ready for practice the next morning. And it became
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: the cycle, and slowly my body kind of started to
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: wear down, and I started to lose my hair. I
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: got diagnosed with osteoporosis when I was twenty years old,
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: which is like not normal, but I just didn't have
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: like any sort of bone density, like nothing. I kept
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: getting stress structures and getting hurt, and that UM made
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: me a horrible runner, which put more pressure on me.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: And one morning I woke up and I looked in
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: the mirror and like my skin was dull, my hair
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: was gone, my body looked terrible because UM, when usually
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: when you have any eating disordered, disordered eating, it becomes
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: cyclical when you start to store, everything is back because
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: your body isn't bid or flight mode, and so I
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: had no muscle definition and it was just horrible. So UM,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: that day I went and I quit track, and then UM,
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: I went and I dropped out of the Honors college
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: at my school. And then I drove home to my
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: parents house and I told them so from then on,
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: it's kind of been I guess four years of UM.
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: I would say I was sick for four years like that,
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: and then four years of healing. And that's kind of
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: like the overview of my story. Jumping right out at me.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: You said in high school you started on an eating plan.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: Did you put yourself on this plan or did your coach?
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: And what was the plan? It was my coach and
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: um it I mean usually I feel like, especially for athletes,
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: these plans that you're on sound really good. So it
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: was kind of like no processed food, like eating clean.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: I think that that I have quote I would say
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: that was quotes. But eating clean can become very extreme,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: and that's kind of been like a keyword I feel like,
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: especially nowadays that pops up. Um. So I think I
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: took it to an extreme. I think it could have
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: been good, but then I started to think that if
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: I got off the plan that I was on, I
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be as good as an athlete, And so I
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: was putting a lot of pressure and kind of idolizing
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: this idea of eating cleanly and took it to an
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: unhealthy level. At what point in your as you said,
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: in your sickness, did you realize that you were sick?
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: Um what's crazy is even when I was diagnosed by
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: a doctor with osteoporosis, I still did not think I
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: had a problem, and only I knew what I was
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: doing to my body, and I had people telling me like,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: you don't look good, you look sick. And I still
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: was like, No, this is what I need to be doing.
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: This is like how I'm going to be a good
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: athlete or I'm gonna look good or I'm gonna How
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: many years there the other girls? How many years into
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: this did you find out that you had asked to
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: your process? Four? Four? And how how did you go about?
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: I mean I talked a little bit about with me.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: I I would I would either I wasn't, I wouldn't binge.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: I would eat as little as I could and see
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: what I could manage. When I was in high school,
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: you know, growing up because I rode um, I was
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: in a question and so I was always competing, and
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: so I started to learn the method of what I
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: could do and still perform. But mine never got to
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: that point because then I switched mine to them being
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: like a complete emotional eater and having this huge chip
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: on my shoulder when it came to anything, and food
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: was my answer to everything. Um, you said, you you
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: hit it for a while and at night you would
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: almost like black black out. M do you think you
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: were really hiding it? And what was kind of that
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: process for you? Yeah? I definitely think I was hiding
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: it because I would eat all my news alone. I
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: wouldn't go out to eat. Um, I've lived with other girls,
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: but I would eat in my room and UM. Kind
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: of like after cloth or two during that day, I
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: would just go and I knew that what I was
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: doing wasn't healthy and I wouldn't feel good afterwards. But
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: it literally it was this experience of like I can't
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: stop myself. That's why I would say like blacking out
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: or out of body. It just it didn't feel like me.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: It was like this whole other thing that you almost
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: can't control. I think a lot of it was stress
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: and pressure and um kind of when you get to
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: this place of putting so much pressure on yourself. I
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: don't know if you felt this, but sometimes like your
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: food or your workout regiment, feels like the only thing
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: you can control when a lot of other things are
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: out of your control. And so I think that it
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: was almost like my striving to control something in my life,
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: right I Mine was similar. I think for me it
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: was about I wanted to be perfect, and I took
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: the negative and made that my positive. Like any time
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: somebody was like are you okay? You you lost a
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: bunch of weight, or this happened. I would almost double
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: down on the bad behavior, like I'm doing it right, Yes, okay.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: This is what I tell a lot of people that
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: are like, I think my friend has an eating disorder.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: I don't know what to do or whatever. Never say
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: that they look good, and never say they look bad
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: because any common about their body is going to trigger
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: them to do something. Yeah, you're going to have some
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: that I lost weight. Yeah, I was like, oh, I'm
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: doing something right. Yeah. It becomes this obsession that takes
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: over everything else. And what would you say for our
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: listeners who don't know if they have an eating disorder?
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: What would you say, like a red flag is other
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: than you know, being diagnosed by a doctor, because a
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: lot of people aren't going to see a doctor because
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: they don't want to know. Or if your friend is yeah,
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: I think, um it is chicky, because um, you don't
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: want to say something is something it's not, and you
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: also don't want to ignore something that you're doing. So
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: I think they're eating disorders, and there's disordered eating and
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: you could read about it all day long, but I
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: would say the biggest thing to look for it is like,
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: does the idea of food stress you out? And are
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: you unwilling to eat with others? I think those are
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: the two things that UM when I saw a therapist,
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: which is my other big thing is if you do
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: feel that way, always seek professional help. Don't like read.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: I mean you can reach out to someone that you
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: think is an influencer or whatever, but always seek a
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: professional I think that's the biggest thing. I advice I
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: can give, UM, even if you're not sure, especially if
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: you're not sure, but if food stresses you out and
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: if you're scared to eat with others, I would just
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: take a step back and really look at why are
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: you eating and um, why does it stress you out?
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: And why can't you eat you with another person? UM.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: A phrase that is stuck with me actually that has
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: been really helpful is I was watching an Anthony Bourdain episode, UM,
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: and he was in Greece in a woman UM that
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: was there said I want to walk away from a
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: meal and not tell you what I ate, but who
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: I ate with. And that's kind of changed. Like my
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: relationship with food and with meals is make it in
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: enjoyable experience for sure. That that's exactly Honestly, when you
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: just said that, I was like, Wow, that is something
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: I'm always saying. I'm like, if you're going into the
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: holidays and you're revolving it solely around what you can
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: and can't eat, and it's not around about the people
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: you're spending it with or friends or family, then you're
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: focusing on the wrong things. Yes, And it can become
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: such an obsession. And I think it's hard because so
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: oftentimes we want to put it on, we want to
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: label it on something like I could say it's because
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: I were owed horses and I wanted to win, and
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: I looked best in beag skin tight pants if I
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: looked a certain way. But I'm really curious and what
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: the actual like is this something that starts with us
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: way before that And I don't know. And we're gonna
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: have a like a nutrition like a professional on that's
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: going to speak to us on that. But I think
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: oftentimes we hear about it with athletes and really strong
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: personalities because then they become more open about discussing it.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: But so much of the time it's happening everywhere, and
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: and I don't think that friends, our parents know how
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: to talk to us about it, and I also feel
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: like I remember being on the other end of it,
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: and I had no patience for anybody's opinion. Yeah. When that,
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: whenever someone would like pull me aside and tell me
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: what they thought or how they thought I looked or
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: something like that, it made me angry. And so it's
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: almost like you has to come to a place of
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: realization on your own. And I think that what you
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: can bring that about is talking about it more, just
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: people that have gone through it, being more open about it,
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: because eventually there's going to be a girl that hears
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: you and they're like, I experienced that too, and that's
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: not healthy and I probably need to change. But it
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: has to I think it has to come from an
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: internal place, because whenever someone externally would approach me, I
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: would be like, this is so annoying, Like you don't
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: you don't understand why I'm doing this. I'm doing this
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: so I can run better like you've never run before.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: So you don't get it. So I think it does.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: I think that's why sharing your story is so important,
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: because someone's going to hear is going to click yeah,
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: and you realize you're not alone and you're significantly younger
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: than I am, so I didn't grow up in the
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: world of like social media where everybody's like face tuning
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: their bodies to become something that doesn't actually even exist
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: in this world. And did you find any extra pressure
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: or difference because there was so much online at the time,
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: Like you could look you can go on Instagram and
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: you see people posing in bathing suits every single day.
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: Some are them and some aren't really them. You see
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: them in real life and you're like, what the yep.
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: I definitely think that that was like a subconscious thing.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: Like I said, mine kind of strip from running, So
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: I think seeing runners online was and like seeing how
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: successful they were in day looks like that was more
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: of a trigger for me. But I would say in recovery,
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: it was really important for me to not look at
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: social media and things online because you can't get to
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: that place of like I'm never gonna look like that,
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: like this is hopeless or whatever. So I don't know
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: that wasn't a direct trigger for me, um, but I
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: know it is for other people, and I do think
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: there's a subconscious element there too. It's interesting that you
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: say that about runners and how you start to look
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: at other runners. I read this book. It's called Fast Girl.
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: Susie Favor wrote it, and it is truly incredible her
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: she had developed a complete eating disorder all revolved around
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: how all the different runners looked. And I think so
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: often times we are comparing ourselves to others instead of
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: looking at ourselves and actually loving ourselves. And that's the
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: hardest thing about this world that we live in now.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: Of comparison. Oh yeah, I mean comparisons the thief of joy.
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: I feel like people say that all the time, but
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: it is so true. It really is. If if I
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: didn't compare myself to anybody else, then I would probably
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: be so content. But seeing what everyone else is doing, definitely,
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: and how everyone else looks and having something that you
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: don't have, and it really takes away from the joy
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: that you should be feeling in that moment. And what
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: would you say some of the tools you could give
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: our listeners if they're hearing this and they're relating to
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: your story, what could you what advice need to get them?
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: My biggest piece is seek professional help. Even if you
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: don't think that you have a fall on eating disorder anything. Um,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: there's no shame in going to a therapist at all.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: I think it's the best thing ever um either a
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: therapist or a dietitian, I think it's huge. I think
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: being intentional to spend time with other people face to
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: face and putting your phone down and really like have
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: a three hour long dinner with your best friends at
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: your house and have no phones and just enjoy the
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: people around you rather than looking to the internet and
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: influencers and all these things that you're seeing every day.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: I think that's huge. And then really just listening to
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: your body, like flowing down and not being in a
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: rush and listening to what your body needs that day.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: It might be a glass of water instead of another snack,
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: where it might be another snack or whatever. But I
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: don't think that we pay enough attention to what our
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: bodies are saying. And usually our bodies are right. Yeah,
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: that's true, And it's day by day, you know, I
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: think if you wake up and and also a big
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: thing for me has been preparing myself for things that
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: are and especially now that I'm pregnant, but preparing myself
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: with healthy foods that make me and my baby feel good.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: And there's no shame in bringing snacks with you. Yeah,
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: I mean, for sure, because the worst thing you I
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: could you know, I used to would be like I
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: would be angry, and then I would make decisions based
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: on you know, I need this, write this, as opposed
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: to being like, oh wow, no, I have all these
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: perfectly great snacks that are going to fuel me and
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: make me feel good and then not set off red
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: flags of some past issues. Yeah, no, definitely. Well, I
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: cannot thank you enough for talking to us. And how
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: do people reach out to you if they want to
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: speak to you and kind of get some more tools? Um,
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: they can message me on Instagram. Instagram is Jess Clark
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: underscore and Clark hasn't e at the end. But I'm
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: really bad at checking my messages. So on your profile
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: there's the email button and I check my email more
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: often and that's really meat too, So emailing there from
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: my Instagram perfect. Thank you so much, of course, thank you.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: Bye bye. So, guys who got to tune in after
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: the break because we have Jackie gold Schneider coming on.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: She is a real housewife of New Jersey who has
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: openly struggled with her and arexia, and she is willing
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: to share her story with us. Hey Jackie, how are you? Hey? Patty,
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: how are you good? Thank you? Can you pronounce your
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: last name for me? I'm a hot mess express always
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: gold perfect. Thank you so much for coming on and
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: sharing your story with us. I just got off the
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: phone with Jessica Clark, who had been talking to us
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: about binging and purging, and it's starting at kind of
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: a young age because she had set herself on an
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: eating plan and it was all due to wanting a
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: runner's body and being a successful runner. And I think
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: that oftentimes it is linked to sports, but it's also
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: so much more And I would love to hear kind
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: of your background and your story I think helps so
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: many of our listeners. Yeah, I think mine so I
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: never binged and purged. I never had um bolimia. I
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: was anorexic, and um mine wasn't linked to sports. Mine
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: was just having no concept of healthy eating. I mean,
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: it's not really something my parents taught me. Um So
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: mine was that I got very heavy and then suddenly
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: like the impulse to lose weight was like like I
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: had was like do or die, Like I had to
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: get all the weight off because that suddenly I felt
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: so terrible about myself, and so I just took the quicken. Um,
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: I was sixteen years old. Okay, sorry to cut you off, Yeah, no,
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: no problem. And so I think I just I got
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: involved with some really unhealthy eating habits and I would
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: my weight would fluctuate constantly, and then I figured out
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: that really the less I ate, the more I was
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: going to lose. And I just once I started in
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: my mid twenties, I just couldn't let go of it.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: And it really it takes you on a really downward
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: spiral where you're just afraid of putting any weight back,
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: and you know, got really bad for me and what
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: we're When did you start realizing that it was taking
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: a toll on your life? Um? I think when some
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: of my habits. So I went through a really tough
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: time for about ten years, and I think, UM, when
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: some of my habits began, um taking life of their
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: own when I couldn't when I couldn't stop myself from
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: you know, bringing a food scale to a restaurant or
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: from um, little things like just just terrible habits that
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: I had when I couldn't stop them, when I couldn't
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: talk myself out of them. Then I knew that I
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: was that it was becoming dangerous and my weight started
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: getting very low. Um, I had almost I had like
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: eight percent body fat. Little things. I lost my period,
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: I I never got it back. I you know, I
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: ended up with fertility problems. UM, a lot of things.
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: I realized along the way that it was bad, and
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: I still couldn't stop. Yeah, and do you think that.
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: I mean for our listeners out there that aren't sure
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: if they are developing, you know, a sickness. So some
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: of the red flags for you or you were bringing
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: a scale to restaurants, Yeah, I mean there had a
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: lot of red flags. I knew. I knew that the
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: way I was eating wasn't wasn't healthy. I mean, if
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: you're ever if you ever feel compelled to really restrict
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: yourself so much, it's not a natural way to lose weight.
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: I would say, if it's not a lifestyle, then it's
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: probably not a good idea. I think, Um, I think
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: you know whether or not something is healthy for you.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: I mean I was substituting regular food with diets up
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: to suits like any chance I could, Um, if it's
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: if it's too artificial, if it's you know, I would say,
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: if you if you have a question about it, really
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: try to see a nutritionist, you know, because they'll tell
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: you whether or not it's a healthy habit. UM. You know,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: I wish I had done that sooner. And what kind
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: of led you to the place that you finally did? UM?
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: I somebody referred me to I was really bad, and
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: somebody had referred me to UM, a nutritionist who specialized
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: in eating disorders, and they said, just see her one time,
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: and if you don't, if you don't like her, then
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: you don't have to go back. And the minute I
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: saw her, she she understood what I was going through,
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: and I knew that she could be the person to
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: help me. But when she told me the ways that
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: I was behaving, that we're impacting my children, then I
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: was like, that's it. When I saw so, I was
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: weighing my children's food to UM, and it was just
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: like all encompassing, like I couldn't I couldn't stop controlling
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: what they were eating. Also, And once I realized that
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: I was doing that, I said, this is done. I
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: have to be done. It's so crazy that you said that,
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: because that was it was. It took me to get
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: pregnant to finally change my life to say I I
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: can't live like this anymore. I have no idea what
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: I'm doing. I have to educate myself. I have to
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: start healing because now I have kids and I can't
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: possibly let them see what I'm doing to myself on
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: a daily basis, right, And that's that's the thing. You
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: have to get to the place where you have that breakthrough,
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: you know, like people can't force it on you. Um,
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: which is terrible because a lot of a lot of
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: people want to help you when you're struggling, and it
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: really has to be something that you want to do
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: for yourself. I mean, that's what I found for myself.
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: And this is a controversial topic. But in your opinion,
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: does you're eating disorder go away? Oh? No, definitely not.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: I mean I'm work. I consider myself recovered, but I
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: still have lingering, like terrible anxiety over food sometimes, which
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: is so strange because I really don't have anxiety, and
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: I consider myself confidence and like have everything under control.
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: But when it comes to food and eating, I get
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: like I get the urge to restrict myself more than
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: I need to. Well, it's interesting that you use the
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: word control because that's the one of the biggest triggers
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: when it comes to you know, it's something we in control.
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: Um yeah, definitely. So what when you're feeling when you're
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: feeling it coming back, or you're feeling like you're in
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: a place where your your anxieties high because of it,
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: what are some of the tools that you do to
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: combat it? Now? Um? Well, I first I remind myself
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: that that my children are watching me, and I have
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: a daughter. I mean I have three boys and they
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: watched me too, But I have a daughter and I
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: don't want her to experience any of this. Um I Also,
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: you know, in those moments, then I remind myself that,
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: like what I went through with such torture, and I
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: can never do that again. So even if I skip
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: a meal today, I'm not going to be able to
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: go back to what I was because it wasn't a life.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: It was not a life. All I thought about was
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: food and my my wedding. All I thought about was
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: what I was eating or wasn't eating. I mean, that
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: was terrible to spend your wedding like that, you know,
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: So I just remind myself that, like, it's not worth it.
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to go back to that. I could
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: never go back to that, so you know, you talk
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: yourself out of it, but it's hard. It's still hard.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: I still have a problem when I step on the
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: scale and I'm a pound heavier tooth sons heavier. It's hard.
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: And what would you say to our listeners out there
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: that have a loved one like your husband at your wedding, Like,
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: do you think he was aware of that? What's the
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: best way to support one if they're going through this.
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: You know, my husband, I feel bad because he had
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: no idea what to do with me, and he would
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: always tell me how beautiful I was and like suggest
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: me share something, and I always turned it away. Um.
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: I think it's a lot to put on your loved
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: ones to expect them to know what to do. But
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: for a loved one who does want to help, I
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: would suggest, you know, don't give up and keep trying
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: to get Uh. The person who's struggling to see somebody professional, Um,
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: be it a therapist or a nutritionist who specializes in
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: eating disorders. Um, don't try to do it yourself, you know,
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: don't try to tell them to just eat. It doesn't
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: really work like that. But I would I would really
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: try to take them to see somebody who's specialized in this,
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: because that, I mean, that's the same exact thing Jessica
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: set as well. And that's how I feel. If if
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: you're struggling, if if you know that you need to
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: seek professional help, there's you don't win an award for
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: for grin and bearing it. And the percussions are huge. Um. Also,
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: I'm curious do you think that your kids, because it
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: happened at the beginning, to think they have any idea
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: or No. I don't because I stopped. I started eating
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: again when they were they were pretty little, so they
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: were Um. I have two sets of twins, so my
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: older ones were four. My my babies were too, So
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: I don't think they remember any of it. Um. And
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: I make a real show of making sure they see me,
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: you know, share things with them and eat like heavy food.
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: You know. I also make them see me, you know,
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: be healthy. And they see mommy and daddy exercise almost
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: every day. UM, so they know they know healthy. They
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: don't just see eating crap. You know. They we teach
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: them healthy habits when we make sure they're always active
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: and physical. And you know, my goal isn't just to
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: show them that I eat it's to show them how
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: to be healthy so they don't ever have to go
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: through the struggle. But I went through I know. I mean,
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: I of course I think the same way, you know,
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: like I want to show my kids as much balanced
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: as I possibly can. I try to we try to
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: do active things together because we live in the world
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: now where kids want to get on iPads or you know,
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: social media or Nintendo switch or whatever the new thing is.
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: And for me, it's like, no, let's go out. And
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying let's go run up, but like run
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: I'm like, let's go play soccer, Let's have a Kurtwheel
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: competition or whatever it may be. So that we're doing
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: active things as a family and it doesn't know I
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: have a punishment. Important. I mean, it's really important to
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: show them both. I mean they say that obesity, the
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: obesity epidemic right now is because kids don't go outside anymore. Yeah.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: And do you think, just kind of in closing, do
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: you think there's one trigger that really hits you that
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: then you have to really like dig into or do
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: you think that or it just comes up randomly, like
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: does it come from stress or being busy? Um? No,
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: I would say, I'm most triggered by the scale, which
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: is why I really try to stay off of it now.
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: I used to weigh myself every single day, and if
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: I was if I like straight more than like a
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: half pound from what I was, I wouldn't know what
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: to do with myself. And now I probably weighed myself
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: three times a year. I try to go more by
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: my clothing, um, because I just get it just makes
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: me a little crazy. So when I see numbers on
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: the scale, that triggers me. Um, So I try to
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: stay away from that. Yeah. I think that's the biggest thing.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: You You learn what your triggers are, You learn what
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: works for you what doesn't, and then you know, I
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: think even us being able to have this conversation is
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: something that didn't happen ten years ago. Yeah, absolutely, so right.
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for sharing your story with us,
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: Thank you for for calling in, for letting me, you know,
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: have this opportunity. It was great talking to you. Great
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: talking to you too. Okay, I'm looking forward to bringing
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: Christie on because there are so many of us who
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: are struggling with our relationships with food, but we don't
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: realize are we binging and purging, Um, is it anorexia?
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: Is it body dysmorphia? As it self? Hate? And my
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: emotional eating? What's going on? So? I I think having
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: her lay it all out for us and give us
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: some tools UM is a great way for our listeners
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: to connect and also figure out what support groups they
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: should be reaching out to. Hi, we're on with Christie Morrale.
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: She is a registered dietitian. She's also a sports dietitian
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: at the USC and for the l A Kings. So
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: we're so happy to pick your brain. Thank you so much,
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: thank you. No, I'm happy to be here, absolutely so.
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: Earlier on in this episode, we had on somebody who
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: had a history of binging and purging, and then somebody
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: who on and off has had an active anorexia disorder.
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: And for the people listening who don't understand the difference
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: on all these englisht orders, can you kind of explain
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: them and then also the effects they have on our
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: body long term? Sure? I mean there are many different
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: days and can start with anorexia. Obviously, it's starving the body,
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: so it's not to be your body and your brain
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: enough nutrients. And I mean I've been doing the eating
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: disorder work for almost twenty years now, and I will
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: say that there are long term effects. For example, I
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: had an AX clients who are seeing in her teens,
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: and she made a full recovery, which is awesome, but
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: she was walking down a flight of stairs then missed
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: her step and then literally broke her hip. And she
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: was only at that time, I think twenty two. So
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: the challenges when you're young and you develop an eating disorder,
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: your bones and your body it just doesn't grow properly
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: and you can have a lot of long term effects
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: with possibly getting pregnant or having very brutal bones and
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: you know, your hair may never grow the way that
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: it should have or um, you know your your skin,
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: and there's so many different effects that way. So the
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: restriction is probably the most dangerous because you can you
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: can die and um, when you don't give your body
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: enough food, it pulls from your organs and which is
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: why some matter extits you passed away won't a heart
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: attack because of that. So that's the most fear UM
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: and at that point they're in in treatment in a
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: hospital or getting the type of help that they need. UM.
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: But they're all types of restriction. I mean you can
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: be functioning and be analytics um, and there are plenty. Unfortunately,
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: I see that a lot in the way because everybody
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: tries to be a lot leaner than probably what their
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: body set point should be. So there are sort of
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: in a state of restriction um and obsessive compulsive thinking
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: about it all the time throughout another a whole kind
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: of area of restriction. And then binge eating is um
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: somebody who could bend but not necessarily perched, and so
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: they would just have a bench eating disorder, or they're
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: not doing anything to counteractive enging, but they may restrict
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: all day, which is what I see often, and then
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: trying to be good quote unquote or trying to diet
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: but then not able to us sustain that, and then
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: come up, come home at night and binge and eat
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: you know, three or four thousand calories um, and then
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: the cycle starts all over. And then they get up
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: in the morning and they try to be good and
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: then they restrict. So that's that's a that's a common
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: cycle and see often. And then of course being me
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: is somebody who binges em purges, but not always like
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: some people will not necessarily binge and then perch. You
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: could have somebody who just is terrifying terrified of beaning weight,
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: so they may just eat a normal sized meal, but
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: I don't want to keep that in them, so then
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: they'll part that. So that's another whole level. And then
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: the other line is orthorexia, which is an obsession with
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: eating healthy. Um, so that was really interesting because it's
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: it's people who don't eat, but they only will eat
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: things with no processed sugar and only certain ingredients and
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: are over the top healthy. And I think again that
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: one is very common to get away with an alley
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: because people are almost crazed for eating healthy. And I
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: think that in itself is actually kind of dangerous because um,
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: we're almost like, oh my gosh, you have some of
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: health controller you're so great. But really what they are
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: is completely obsessed and taken over by looking at ingredients,
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: been watching everything. They put no body. So all of
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: these disorders are very like they're just not present in life.
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: They're very controlled and obsessed. I'm thinking about all of
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: that all the time, and that's also another level of
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: dangerous for that too. And do you think there's a
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: root cause of this happening? And do you think the
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: root cause can change by disorder. Oh absolutely, there's so
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: many that I wouldn't say there's one in particular root
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: cause there's so many different levels. But I would say
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: from my experience of being in l A specifically with
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: all the young kids that I see, because I also
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: specialize in adolescents adolescents, and I think that the main
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: issue is this constant pressure of looking good and eating healthy,
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: like over the top healthy and um and the parents.
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of the young kids that I
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: see are very much like that. You know, you can
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: exercise healthily and you can eat healthfully, but when you
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: are cutting out things and exercising its obsessively and talking
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: about it. When that young child, whether it's a bloy
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: or girl, because I definitely have some bloyers in my
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: practice now too, see that and then they could attach
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: that type of eating and lifestyle and that's how it is.
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: I feel it affects the younger the younger kids, and
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: I would say with my teenagers that I see, it's
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: very much so. The Instagram world his has has impacted
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: the way they feel about their bodies, how they should
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: be eating. But they're not eating clean enough, or they're
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: not exercising as much, or I don't how they might
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: not have those apps like so and so has on Instagram.
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: So I think there are many, many different levels to this, UM,
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: and I think that it's just I don't see where
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: it's getting better. And I think that's where it's a
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: little frustrating, UM, being in this practice. So what would
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: you say that? So I have little kids, and I have,
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: you know, consistently had issues surrounding food and body image
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: until after I had my kids. And the biggest thing
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: for me and why I decided I need to actively
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: work on changing my life and I created a business
• 48:16
  Speaker 1: from it and all types of things because I'm so
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: passionate about it is because I want my kids to
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: have a healthy relationship with food. So I want to
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: make sure that I'm doing the right things. And I
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: you know, something that we do in our house is
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: we try to do active things together. But I'm not
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: like saying, hey, you ate that, so now you gotta
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: go run around. I'm like, you know, I we try
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: to do family hikes together, we play sports, we do
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: things that are activities. UM. And then when we're in
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: the house, we all, you know, we eat healthy foods,
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: but if we're out to dinner, everybody picks what they
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: want to eat, But what would you say kind of
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: the best ground rules for having your family kind of
• 48:59
  Speaker 1: follow so you're not leading your kids into some of
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: the same issues that you've once had. Yeah. Absolutely, Now
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: I think that's a great question, because I do think
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: and I get this asked a lot by parents pressing. Foremost,
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: it's creating a healthy relationship, your stuff of food, what
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: you're doing, So it's the dynamic arabs and that there's
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: many like not bad, this is good kind of scenario. Um.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: I think eating together as a family, which I see
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: a lot missing, and I get that my kids aren't sports,
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: parents are busy, but when you can eating together as
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: a family, it's also role modeling what is healthy, what
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: is normal, how everybody eats, not that the I see
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: a lot of kids have dad eats one thing the moment,
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: it's one thing. Everybody's like, you know, the mom like
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: steam spinach and you know, egg whites, and the dad's
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: eating it's just laster disordered. So trying to eat in
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: a more unified way, I think it's very important, and
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: then having conversations about it, you know, you can say
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: obviously when you're both a party today, you don't need
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: to be having you know, something after lunch and I
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: know them for the birthday party and probably have skating
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: or something that that's okay to have this conversation that
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: helps them understand why not that you're saying you're better
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: leave this monthday party then and have nothing because you
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: already have lemonade with lunch, Like that's not useful. It's
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: it's not gonna be mad at them. It's really engaging
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: them and helping them because at the end of the day,
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: they're gonna not always be decide you and they're gonna
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: have to make right decisions. And so you can educate
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: them on why, you know, how we create balance, Like
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: you know what, you really had pizza and French fries yesterday.
• 50:32
  Speaker 1: We're gonna try to do something a little bit different today.
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: Let's try not to have human I mean, and if
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: you help them understand it's balance that I think is
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: incredibly beneficial for young kids because I think they can
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: understand like, yeah, that doesn't mean I feel good when
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: I eat fried foods every day. So I'm going to
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: add in something coold, you know, because yesterday I ate
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: a bunch of you know, fried food or whatever. So
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: I think it's it's talking with your kids, educating them
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: on the why and balance is really and I know
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: for my son, he really loves like if I'm like,
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: you know, spinach is going to make you strong? Or
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: this chicken, you know, because if it was up to him,
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: he would eat like want processed cheese at every meal
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: like you feeling, Can I have agony and cheese for breakfast?
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: And for la Can I have a grilled cheese? You know?
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: Like he just loves all of that type of things.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: But the second that I make it fun and I'm like, well,
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: you know, Popeye love spinach because it made his muscles
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: really big, He's like, MoMA, it's so important. Especially the
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: you know, sports dietician team and I talk a lot about,
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: you know, the nu trands that your body needs to
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: grow strong to you know, maximize your health whatever you um, yeah,
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: maximize or health, but also grows. Pauls we're going to
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: be right, so we all have a step point of
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: where we're supposed to be hepe wise. But if you
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: undernurish yourself and you're not doing the right proper things
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: like that, that can technically stunt grows. So yes, you
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: want to make sure that you're incorporating fruits and vegetables
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: and lots of him tramp dempse foods and explain them why,
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: you know, the muscle and being strong. And I always
• 52:05
  Speaker 1: talk about health like it's no fun on a big
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: soccer game to be sick. So it's important to get
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: a lot of anti accidents into your body so you
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: can hopefully, you know, not get as sick as as
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: other kids. Um So I think that's important too. I
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: mean getting them involved in cooking. You know, I have
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: this whole conversation with parents and their lunches. You know,
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: their kids will come home for lunch and not lunches.
• 52:28
  Speaker 1: That happens to me sometimes. But when they pick, they
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: pick like not lunch, they pick like fifty four snacks
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: and they're like this seems like a good choice, and
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: I'm like, you're not this. You can't have raisins and
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: right right right right. So it's really a struggle. Yeah,
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: it is. I mean it's not easy and there's not
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: one way doing this, Like every family has to kind
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: of figure out what works for them. But if you
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: sit down and you're like, okay, I gotta like have
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: a things of carbohydrates, where is that? Where is your
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: sons of protein? Where is your where a rishable? It
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: might look a little, you know, decopartmentalized like in a
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: in a snack type of it isn't like all the
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: components are there. You're fine, and they look like a
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: traditional sandwich, sticks and fruit or something. But you want
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: them to make sure that they're eating something. So that's
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: when from getting the kids involved, because ultimately they're going
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: to open their lunch box and either tune to eat
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: it or not. And I'd rather eat it to have
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: energy and to be able to concentrate and focus in
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: class versus well, I tell my mom, I did not
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: because you do so much. And I'm still not gonna
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: eat a sand much, you know. So it's it's almost
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: you feel better about today's lunch because lunch looks like
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: a shrikuderie tray. Fine about that? I actually am like,
• 53:42
  Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think there's anything wrong with it
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: as young as they're going to eat it, honestly. And
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: so some reader questions in regards to family, friends and parenting,
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: what are your thoughts on parents pointing out children's weight
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: gains and losses to their own you mean, to your
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: own child, or to their sister or their father or
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: their you know child. However, however, the dynamic is so
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: I guess, let me see poll just on this correctly.
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: So let's say your sister's child or gaining weight and
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: you're noticing that. No, your sister's gaining weight and you're
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: noticing that, or your child's gaining weight, and you're noticing
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: that that. That's a common question that people are having
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: because if they're noticing it, what do they do? Okay,
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: great questions. Okay, so this one is do we really
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: really important? Because this is where the hang up gets
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: started to like kind of go down a disordered path.
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: I always tell parents to put it on the putrition
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: because then you're out of it. Just say, honey, we're
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: gonna take you. You haven't had a check up in
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: a while. We're going to take you to the pediutrition.
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: Just make sure all is good. I mean, that's pretty typical.
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: That doesn't feel like anything's wrong with that. Right then
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: you call ahead to pedu trition and you're like, look,
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: I noticed that, you know, whatever she has pull un
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: some way. I feel like she's and I just don't
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: want you know, I'm gonna prevent anything that can possibly
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: cause like no diabetes or any health related issues, and
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: so I want you to be able to have a
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: conversation with her. It's kind of a dynamic of the
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: parent and the child. I feel like when parents approached
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: the child. But again depends on the kid, but I
• 55:22
  Speaker 1: it's sometimes can go sideways pretty quickly, and then there's this.
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: Then they feel watched. Then they feel like they have
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: to sleep eat because now their parents known has that
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: they're gaining weight. And if the child comes to that's different.
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: If if she says or he says, well, I feel
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: like I'm gaining weight, like like my stomach or whatever.
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: That's a conversation, like you know what I mean. And
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: if you're feeling that way, like, let's look at what
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: do you think you could do differently? You know, I've
• 55:48
  Speaker 1: noticed that you've not been as acting. Maybe we could
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: just start doing that. Be very gentle. This isn't like
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: let's send you to a weight last person. Let's let's
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: I think it's the conversation and really snaing with some
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: passion that's important. But when you're noticing and they they
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: don't say anything to you. I always want to mend
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: that's a perfect opportunity to have the pediatrician because when
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: the parents and again you have to really know your
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: own child. If that's the best direction. Some parents can
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: go to their child and say, you know, honey, I've
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: noticed that you know your parents have gotten smaller and
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: and I just want to make sure, like you know,
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: do you see that too? And see but again it's
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: such a so you know, I mean, because always better
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: when you the pediatrician is such That's what I've had
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: most parents who call me and like, look, I've noticed this.
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: I'm like, right, you have a good relationship with your pedisician,
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: just awesome talk to them, has them have that conversation.
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: They can ask the questions of while are you having that?
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: Are you? You know? Because when the parent gets involved,
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: I'm telling you, it's typically doesn't go well. So what
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: are like some not twos like what are things to do? Well,
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of not tunes for parents. Um, not
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: to a never have a scale that's visible in the
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: battom um. The parents should be very aware of their
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: own body talk of language. Um, if you know, again,
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: like I think saying, you know, let's say your daughter
• 57:22
  Speaker 1: comes to you and so I want to start eating sugar.
• 57:25
  Speaker 1: Could not be like, oh, I mean, that's such a
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: great idea. Let's do that. I think, you know, like
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: I think encouraging them to be like well like always
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: let's have a conversation about that versus you've noticed that
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: your daughter starts to your son like had out things.
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: And I think as parents, as an idea of like,
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: I've had many parents I've time to me be like,
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: how I wish I would have known like I was
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: praising them for eating healthy and calculating their calories, and
• 57:50
  Speaker 1: you know, I just thought they were being healthy. And
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: that's the problem. You could have two people go on
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: a healthy track, one develops a significant eating deferdo and
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: the other one and um, you know, um to sign
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: like thisses a few pounds and feels great, or change
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: her lifestyle and felt amazing. But you just want to
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: be really careful of that. Um. You know, an eating
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: disorder can occur occur no matter which way you were raised.
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: That is, it can and there's no there's no guarantee. Right,
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: you can have very you know, healthy parents who are
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: very normal and healthy food in their bodies and still
• 58:32
  Speaker 1: have a child who again. And that's why I think
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: Instagram world in school becomes very challenging because they talk
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: about it. That's the reality that's nice for meeting. I
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: think the parents would tack about like, hey, I mean,
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: you know, if a girl comes home and be like,
• 58:47
  Speaker 1: oh my gosh, still says on the sign and she
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: lost so much way it looks so good. I don't
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: want to like have a conversation. Stop what you're doing
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: and it will give me. But like those are the
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: moments where like, what do you think about that, honey,
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: because maybe she's gonna she's about to jump on board
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: and you're like, oh, that's great, and you kind of
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: just you know, don't even think twice. But it's really
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: listening to your kids about, you know, what's going on
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: at school. What are the conversations like even if you
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: feel like your daughter son would be that they're totally fine, um,
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: because it can it can sneak up in ways that
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: you don't even realize if you're not paying attention to
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: those kinds of comments, you know. Um. But yeah, I
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: think that that the dynamic at home just needs to
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: be very open dialogue about that in particular, and watch
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: the way they're dressing. I think that's another sign to Um.
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: I've had a lot of girls where moms are like,
• 59:45
  Speaker 1: I didn't even walk still wearing baggy clothes and I
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: got any spail and she was pun pounds down like
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: in two months from being at the pediatrician's office. The
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: mom was just like, how did I not notice? And
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: you know, so I think there are certain things that
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: can go on that you just you just have to
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: kind of know what are the warning signs and just
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 1: communicating as much as you can. Yeah, and how would
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: you know if some if you're struggling with body dysmorphia, Um,
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: it's hold a daughter or just yourself in general for anybody, well,
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: I think, um, that's a fulso big one because I
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: think a lot of people see themselves not as there
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 1: because they're comparing themselves to somebody who looks better than them.
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: So they always still sat and they feel like I'm
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: still not skinny enough because I'm comparing myself too. So
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: and so we're somebody on Instagram. Um, the obsession is
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: really where the danger is when they're looking in the
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: mirror like look. Also, girls like take out this, go
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 1: to the stower, you put your clothes on, you go
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: to the next thing. If you're sitting in examinating yourselves,
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 1: like literally spending more than a couple of minutes, you're
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 1: you're going down at Catchers Road. So why did the more?
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 1: It comes from the lack of self esteem and typically
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: a comparison factor. And um, it's a tough one to
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: get get through because if they're seeing themselves differently than
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: what is that? Obviously there's where the psychological help is needed.
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 1: So I don't see any client unless you're seeing a therapist.
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: So it is that. Yeah, it's much bigger than that. Right.
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: So in closing, if one of our listeners or one
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: of our listeners loved ones is currently struggling, what is
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: your recommendation, Like how do they seek help? If they
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: think I don't have money or I don't know if
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: I have a problem, where do they start? Um, While
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of like I would say, the big UM,
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: you know, the help with eating disorder, there's lots of
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 1: websites like I know that, Um, all the eating disorder
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: treatment fatilities have websites that you can go on and
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: they have like typical questions and you can they can
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: ask um so in questions like Eating Disorder Center of
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: California months meeting. There's are big ones. Um there's a
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: lot of different places here. And then you can even
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: just have reach out to you know, a specialized dietician
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 1: like myself or a therapist and just say can I
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: have a consult like I need to figure out what
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 1: path I need to do? You know, because sometimes it
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: is an outpatient setting and sometimes they at a place
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 1: where they really need more intensive by treatment. UM So
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 1: I guess I would start there. But the TEENA trucition
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 1: is such a good fallback, Like a lot of pediatricians
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: are far to me because that's they they know, you know,
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 1: typically where to um to have the parents reach out
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 1: and and seek help. But that's always a safe place
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: to start because you can kind of see the trends
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 1: like okay, they've lost a lot of weight, or I've
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: seen kids where their heights starts to deplase and that
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: gets really worrisome. So the pediatrician, I would say start there,
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: and then if they want to go online and look
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 1: at some astraining facility that they can help be helpful
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: to just answering some questions well, thank you so much
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: for taking the time with us today. We really happy
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 1: to absolutely have a good day. Okay, thank you so much.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 1: So guys, I know we didn't even get through half
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: of the questions that you'll have, so honestly, please, we
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: want to keep getting these answers to you. Email them
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: to us or d M at Teddy Teapot. If there's
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: something that you feel that we have missed that you
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: want us to cover, we'll get back to you, will
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: send you the resources that you need. And you know,
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: once again, in closing, like what every person here said
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: was comparison. Comparison takes away your joy. Comparison makes you
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 1: believe something that's not true, So really focus on yourself,
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: focus on what makes you feel your best. And honestly,
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: the game changer for me was talking to someone, being open,
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: sharing my story, being okay that I'm not perfect. And
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 1: once I was able to do those things, everything shifted.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: There will always be weird moments or uncomfortable moments or
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: stressful times where you know the red flag will be raised,
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 1: but I'm able to talk about it now, and I'm
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 1: able to have a place where I feel safe, and
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 1: the fact that I can even talk to you guys
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: about it right now. That is helping me heal, so
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: it never goes away. But you're not alone, and you
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 1: know what we're here for you. Thanks for listening. Subscribe
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: to to any Teapot on her radio or wherever you
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: listen to podcasts.